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Therapists Explain Importance of Setting Ground Rules Before Marriage

May 22, 2020 by Power of Positivity

Marriage is a consensual union where two people love and commit to each other for life. While tying the knot is done out of love, a couple truly does not understand the meaning of the word until they have weathered life’s storms together. Marriage is not for the faint of heart, but setting ground rules can prevent misunderstandings down the road.

Some find that once they are married, they feel more like roommates rather than spouses. The daily grind can get to everyone, and the responsibility that comes with such a commitment can be overwhelming. Ground rules are essential, and they should be established before you walk down the aisle.

Ground Rules for a Successful Marriage

If you want a successful partnership and a happy life, then you need to establish some ground rules early on. You may think that it sounds silly to put requirements on a relationship that has a foundation of love. But nothing can be nastier than a married couple throwing verbal punches during an argument. Here are some ground rules that can help you ensure your union is a long and blissful one.

Also, know that while you agree to these ground rules, they can be flexible–when both parties agree. For example, your feelings about starting a family might change one day. As long as both of you agree to amend these decisions–and play by the new ruling–you’ll do just fine!

1. Don’t Go to Bed Angry

There’s an old saying that states that you should never let the sun go down on your wrath. This is so important because the longer you allow frustrations to boil, the more apt it is to drive a wedge between the two of you.

Most arguments start over silly things, and they should be resolved before you go to bed. You will lie there all night and stew about what happened. As you replay the events in your mind, you will build the situation up to be bigger than it is, and it can easily cause you to resent your spouse.

If possible, don’t go to bed before at least committing to sort things out in the morning and to apologize for any wrongdoing.

2. Vow to Never Allow Family to Interfere

One of the most significant problems in marriages is the in-laws. In many cases, they act like outlaws when it comes to their loved ones. It’s essential to establish firm boundaries regarding the relatives early on.

Never allow your parents or siblings to speak ill of your partner. Additionally, you must ensure that they don’t stick their nose into your business. Your union must be strong, and you cannot let your relatives ruin your successful partnership.

In-laws can quickly destroy your relationship with meddling, especially when you have children. So it’s best that you set firm boundaries with them on what behaviors you expect and what you won’t tolerate.

3. Decide the Financial Stuff

There was a joint checking account in the olden days, and one person handled all the bills. Today’s couples are a bit more diverse in how finances are done. Do you tend to be old fashioned, or do you want to keep money separate?

It’s important to discuss these issues upfront. It can get very messy if two people are trying to pay bills and dipping into the proverbial cookie jar. Finances are one of the problems that can ruin a marriage quicker than anything else, so establish early on how things are done. Decide on a plan that is acceptable for both of you.

Another thing to consider is that neither party should make a significant purchase without talking to one another. Set a dollar limit that you shouldn’t go over without discussing it. The same should be said about opening credit and going in debt.

4. Determine if You Want Children

Another issue that is common among couples is the desire to be a parent. One may want to be a mom or dad while the other one isn’t interested in offspring. It doesn’t matter which side of the fence you are on; you need to voice your desires to your partner.

Don’t skip over the issue because you are afraid to tell your partner how you feel. It could cause a significant rift later.

5. Don’t Bring up the Past

Everyone has a past, and some histories are sketchier than others. When you create a union, you cannot consistently throw your partners past in their face. If your spouse was once addicted to drugs but pulled themselves out of that lifestyle, then they shouldn’t have to live with it being brought up constantly.

You cannot change your past, but you can change your future. Leave what’s behind you alone as it’s not a life sentence.

6. Always Be Honest

Dishonesty can be a quick way to head to divorce court. It’s easy to tell a little white lie now and again, but it can get you in real trouble. Trust your partner enough, to be honest. Make a pact that no matter how upset it might make the other person that you don’t lie to each other.

7. Vow to Keep the Doors of Communication Open

It’s hard to communicate once you’re not dating, and you’re living together. Make one of your ground rules that you keep an open line of communication with each other. Even though life is busy, you should at least have one night a week reserved for date night.

If it helps, keep a list of all the things you want to discuss during that time. Take time for each other, no matter how busy you are in life. Money and prosperity can only get you so far, but if you want true happiness, you will invest in your marriage.

8. Divorce is Not an Option

There may come the point and time in your life when you want to call it quits. Perhaps, you’ve grown apart, or you have had an affair. Life never goes as you plan. Marriages that last more than five years are the anomaly these days.

How do these people that stay married for 40-50 years do it? The key is they don’t quit, no matter how hard they want too. They keep going because they took vows to the other person to have and to hold, through sickness and in health.

While not every union withstands the test of time, don’t be so eager to give up. Make up in your mind that you’re not going to quit, but instead plan to honor your commitment.

9. Don’t Use Harsh Words

Negativity can destroy a bond. For every bit of constructive criticism that you give out, you should follow that with four things of praise. If you’re always telling your spouse all the things they do wrong, you will destroy their morale, and they will avoid you.

Even when you’re amid a heated argument, and you feel like calling names, don’t resort to childish games. Be a grown-up and civilly talk about things. Make a pact and set ground rules that you won’t call names or hit each other no matter what the situation.

10. Make Sure to Keep Personal Things Personal

One of the most significant ground rules in a marriage is learning to keep private things private. If your spouse calls their family or friends and tells them all your personal stuff, it can destroy your union. Make sure these rules extend to finances, romance, children, or any information you don’t want to be shared.

Establish rules about what things should never be shared beyond your union, and make sure you both keep these things out of the public.

11. Don’t Argue in Front of Children or Others

There are very few couples that agree on everything. However, take your arguments to a private area and don’t fight in front of children, relatives, or the public. When you disagree, no matter how trivial, go somewhere that you can discuss it calmly, and don’t get everyone else involved.

12. Make Your Relationship a Priority

Marriage takes work, and it’s not easy. Your union must be a priority every day. Your spouse, their needs, and desires, should always come before your own. When your commitment to your job is complete, your spouse and children get the next priority in your day.

If you want to hang with friends or relatives and do other things, they should be after your relationship needs are met.

Setting Ground Rules for a Happy Life

There’s no rule book when it comes to marriage; however, by establishing ground rules that cover the basics and significant issues, you can take care of many problems before they happen. Love and cherish one another no matter what life throws your way.

There are going to be hundreds of times that you want to throw in the towel and file for divorce. However, there’s something special about those who stick together no matter what comes their way. In sickness and in health are significant vows to make to a person.

Take advice from older couples that have been married for decades. They can give you the keys to a successful marriage. Don’t take advice or seek wisdom from someone who has been divorced a couple of times. You want to make your union last, so you want all the help you can get.

15 Ways to Feng Shui Your Home and Get More Peace

May 22, 2020 by Power of Positivity

Are you looking to create positive energy in your home? Feng shui has been used for centuries to help balance and promote the flow of good chi in your abode. In Chinese, it is a beautifully blended word that means “wind-water.”

Feng shui uses standard principles that anyone can incorporate into their home. It’s one of the Five Arts of Chinese Metaphysics, and they are beneficial to your entire being. If you are looking to create a harmonious environment, then you should consider practicing this art.

The purpose behind this art of space, light, and color, is to clear all the invisible forces that take away from your spiritual focus. The concept is quite simple. Think about your living space and how your furniture is arranged.

The goal is to create an efficient flow so that you can go into and out of a room effortlessly. However, this Chinese art takes things one step beyond good flow and organization. The good news is that it can be incorporated into any design style with ease.

Many have found that these ancient practices help them to set up their new house or redesign an existing room. The goal is to maximize the use of each space and allow it to add beauty and pleasure to your life. You and your whole family will benefit from the domestic harmony it imparts.

According to wind-water philosophy, chi is the life force of the universe. Your home resonates with you and your family’s chi. When it can flow effortlessly, you can enjoy a tranquil home and a prosperous life.

15 Ways of Incorporating Feng Shui to Bring Positivity to Your Home

It may sound a bit overwhelming when you don’t understand this art. While there are many steps to incorporate and tips to follow, it’s all about creating prosperity and a harmonious environment. Try these fifteen things that you can do to help give your Feng shui a jump start.

1. Plant Goodness All Around You

Plants have a special place in the Chinese home as they are the embodiment of life. Bringing nature inside helps you to stay connected, plus it brings along numerous benefits. Feng shui 101 is to strive to have better health and vitality, and when you bring plants inside, it puts you on the right path.

It would be beneficial if you bought foliage that will grow according to your specific environment. Most important is that you don’t buy a bunch of plants and have them die. It’s worse to have a dead plant in your space than to have none. This decor element is a fundamental way to start incorporating these principles that most people can do with ease.

2. Get Rid of Clutter

Do you have piles of books, magazines, and clothes that need to be donated to your local charity? Most people don’t understand that the clutter is stopping the natural flow of energy in their homes. Do you want to disrupt the balance and peaceful calm of the space?

Some things in life weigh you down. If you have a room that is heavy with clutter, then it needs to be addressed. You can enhance the energetic function of space by merely tossing and donating all that extra stuff.

3. Learn Commanding Positions

A commanding position is a feature or piece of furniture in your home that stands for something else. For instance, your couch can be a stand-in for you. Your desk space might be a stand-in for your job, and your dryer might be a stand-in for productivity. The goal is to position these things right so that you can take control of your space and life.

4. Balancing the Elements

Try to incorporate the elements into your peaceful home, which are metal, water, fire, wood, and earth. By having them in your living space, it helps to bring balance. Have you ever been in a room that had wood paneling, wood floors, and wooden accents?

Using too much of one element can be overwhelming to any area. However, when you use wood floors, a stone accent wall on a fireplace, and some metal wall hangings, you will bring the right balance. A room using only one medium is suffocating, but when you have a mixture, they complement each other.

If you cannot use actual elements, such as fire, then you can use the color of fire. A beautiful warm red tone or a bright orange can help to give you the same effect. For water, you can use shades of blue and green. Don’t try to stuff all five elements in each room as it will be too much. However, you should strive to have all five inside your home.

5. Bring in the Light

Natural light is a big part of Feng shui. Have you ever noticed how you feel when the sun breaks after a storm? This invigoration can be created when you let the sunshine in every day.

Never close off windows with blinds and curtains to block your view. Instead, let them bring nature to the inside. Once you expose the windows, make sure to clean them and get off any dirt or debris that can block the flow of sunlight.

If you must have curtains, then choose an excellent opaque style that still allows the light to penetrate. A mirror placed directly across from the windows can also allow the light to reflect throughout the home. Natural radiance lifts everyone’s mood.

However, if you’re in search of high-quality, custom curtain options, consider exploring the top-rated merchandise MaisonDuBeau.com offers. With a wide range of fabrics, colors, and designs, you can easily find the perfect curtains that harmonize with your home’s unique style while still promoting the flow of light. The right curtains can not only add beauty but also contribute to a serene and uplifting space, making every room feel more vibrant and welcoming.

6.The Door to Your Spirit

In the system of wind-water, your home’s front door symbolizes the entry to your soul. Practitioners recommend making it the focal point of your home and avoiding using back and side doors for entry. Make your entryway attractive and clutter-free and painted the color of the direction it faces.

7. Points to Forget

Sharp, angular décor, and features don’t have a place in a chi-centered home. They represent broken relationships and cutting words. Instead, opt for soft, sloping lines and rounded edges. Circles are especially encouraged since they embody eternal life.

8. Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

Ever since humans first saw their reflection in the water, we’ve had a collective affinity for mirrors. If you want to make a space look larger and more abundant, mirrors do the trick. They represent the water element in your space and enhances its chi.

Remember to use round mirrors and use a large one or a few small ones to create a focal point. As the mirror reflects things before it, so your home reflects your soul. Consider at least one mirror in each room.

9. Keep Your Flooring the Same

Have you ever been into a home that used different styles of flooring in each room? That feeling of unbalance wasn’t just in your head. For chi to flow uninterruptedly, keep the same flooring throughout your house.

If you can, consider using natural floor elements rather than carpet. Not only are they easier to clean, but they bring in positive wind-water balance. It’s best to use wood or stone tile.

Hardwood floors, in particular, are a fantastic option for creating a seamless transition from room to room. They not only provide an elegant, timeless look but also help to maintain a sense of balance and unity throughout your living space.

This type of wood is resistant to dents and scratches, making it a practical yet aesthetically pleasing option for any home. For those looking to invest in quality, the Gulvxtra online store offers a variety of hardwood flooring options, perfect for enhancing your home’s chi and bringing in the natural elements of wood to create a balanced, positive energy throughout.

Whether you’re remodeling a single room or renovating your entire home, choosing the right flooring can make a big difference in both the look and feel of your space.

10. Fixing Squeaks

Did you know that something as small as a door squeaking when you open it can affect your chi? If your front door is making a terrible creak when it opens, then you need to fit it.

It’s possible that you have become so accustomed to the sound that it doesn’t even bother you, or you may not notice it. However, subtle noises can mess with your vibrations, which means it needs to be fixed. Get out the oil and fix that creaking joint.

11. Use a Water Fountain

A water fountain is an excellent way to incorporate the water element into your home. Finding where to put this fountain can be another problem. It’s best to place any water element near your entry door, but you want to make sure the water is flowing towards the center of your abode.

12. Keep Your Bathroom Door Shut

You know that keeping your bathroom door shut is good for obvious reasons, but there are also some harmonious reasons for it. Your bathroom is the place where water leaves, which can also indicate wealth being flushed away. You don’t want to lose any wealth that is coming your way.

13. Cover Any Television in the Bedroom

If you have a television in your bedroom, and it’s not the best idea, then you should cover it when not in use. A television is a form of active energy, and it can disrupt the peaceful haven you are trying to create.

14. Fill the Space Above the Cabinets

One of the commandments of Feng Shui is to make sure that there is no empty space above the kitchen cabinets. If you do have space, then it’s a great location for some houseplants. You don’t want your chi to become stuck in dead spaces, so fill it up with life, and it will enhance your energy.

15. Use White Sage for Space Clearing

Finally, once you have redesigned your space according to this Chinese art, then it’s time to cleanse it with white sage. Go through each area of the home, making sure that the smoke from this herb penetrates every corner.

Sage can help to cleanse impurities as well as get rid of old, stale energy. You don’t want anything standing in the way of your new, fresh energy.

Final Thoughts on How Feng Shui Fits Everyone

The beautiful thing about Feng Shui is that it fits everyone with a myriad of lifestyles. By simply arranging your furniture and items in a specific method, you can change your entire life.

If you want prosperity and a peaceful home, then why not use some items from this list to change the energy and harmonious balance of your space?

Psychics Explain How to Open Up Your Gift of Clairvoyance

May 21, 2020 by Power of Positivity

A clairvoyant is a person that can see beyond the physical realm into the spiritual one. You can communicate with a world that many doubts exist and receive spiritual guidance from the angels. It’s a unique ability that comes with great responsibility.

Clairvoyance is one of many spiritual gifts, and it should not be confused with other callings. Everyone has the power to open themselves to see and receive messages from beyond. You must commit to open your third eye to see into mystic realms. You may take online classes with a Witchcraft Teacher to open up your spiritual abilities.

Once this gateway opens, you can receive guidance, wisdom, and truth to help you and others.

Start with the Basics of Clairvoyance

If you want to delve into spiritual gifts, then you must start with the basics. Do you have an intuitive nature? It’s always best to have a basis in which you can build. Usually, someone who has callings knows it long before they ever come to terms with it.

Do you have visions, dreams, or see things that you don’t understand? Perhaps, part of your spiritual awakening is to accept what you already know to be true. You must make a conscious choice to open these pathways and allow information to flow.

Many people don’t understand that your spiritual gifts have always been there, but it’s waiting for you to accept them. Your unbelief can block the spiritual world from communicating with you, and it can make you miserable until you come to terms with the callings on your life.

Here are six signs you are on a journey to a spiritual awakening.

Every Person Observes Spirit Differently

Each spiritual ability is unique and is subject to interpretation. Spirit can give you the same dream as another, but you will have a different understanding of it. It doesn’t mean that one person is higher on the spiritual ranks than another; it just means that one sees things differently.

It’s hard to grasp this concept as people think that psychics or mediums might have enhanced skills over clairvoyance. Everyone can open their third eye, but some don’t stop with just one gift as they want all spirt has to offer them.

Don’t ever let someone make you feel inferior to their abilities. You don’t have to bow to anyone who tufts their skills as you have the same power within you. Everyone is born clairvoyant, but few choose to open the door to walk into this realm.

Clearing the Blockages to Clairvoyance

How many times have you heard that a baby can see or perceive into divine realms? When you are born into this world, your third eye opens, and naysayers haven’t poisoned you. Sadly, most children have their gifts blocked or closed for whatever reason.

As you age, you may want to address the blockages to re-open your third eye. Did you know that many children have psychic experiences that they don’t know how to explain? They may not tell anyone because they don’t know how to put things into words, or they’re afraid of rejection.

If you have a child, they may see ghosts walking through your home, spiritual mists wafting about in your hallway, or see an energy field around someone. They don’t know how to label the things they see.

Does your child drawn unique pictures or have an imaginary friend? Many choose to communicate with spirit without telling anyone. They fear they will become an outcast, so they remain silent. These children need to have the power to develop their clairvoyance as they may later want to enhance these callings.

Fear and negativity are the most significant blockages in the spiritual world. Your worries will block your clairvoyance. Even if you have a unique gift, the ability can be turned down or off due to your fears. If your child came to you and said that they saw a ghost in their bedroom, the first thing you would do is downplay their visions.

As a parent, you want your child to rest easy and not be fearful of things that many children dread. However, your child may have seen something, and you downplayed it. Now, you’re an adult, and you want to enhance your abilities, but you are left with the dubious task of clearing the blockages from decades of negativity and fear.

Learn ten techniques to open your third eye.

Canceling Fears

We’ve established that fear is the biggest block in the path of your spiritual awakening. Religious sectors often used fear tactics and said that psychic gifts are evil and not from God. Thankfully, this statement is not valid. Being intuitive is all part of your spiritual makeup.

Another common fear that people must overcome occurs from a past life. Remember the Salem Witch Trials? People didn’t understand the gifts, so they thought that these enlightened individuals were evil witches. Thus, the people lost their lives because of the fear others carried.

You might have experienced traumatic events in your past that have affected your life today. The fears from things that happen to you in another realm might block your gifts. You may have the fear that you will lose control when you are communicating with, and you won’t be able to stop anything scary that you might see.

Once you learn how to release the fear, then you can open your third eye with ease. How does one release the doubt when it’s been a part of them for so long? Well, the first thing you can do is ask Archangel Michael to help you.

You need help to clear your mind, body, and spirit from all negativity surrounding you. Ask for help to see into the realms of the soul. With each breath you take, you can release the fear and negativity that has held you down for so long.

Affirmations to Increase Vibrations

Fear is not the only reason why you may have your spiritual gift blocked. Did you know that you may have problems opening your third eye based on your diet, lifestyle, and substance use? Think of the spirit world as a biofeedback system.

Anything that lowers your vibrations can decrease your abilities to walk into the gift of clairvoyance. However, you can increase your vibrations by using positive affirmations. Say the following things out loud every day:

I will embrace my clairvoyance.
It’s safe for me to open my eyes to see the spiritual world physically.
I will remember my dreams and visions.
I’m a clairvoyant that is highly visual.
I will love and approve of myself.

Did you have problems saying those things? If they don’t flow freely from you, then you still have fears or doubts blocking your path. Say these things over and over and till you can reprogram yourself to live profoundly as a clairvoyant.

Read some tips how to increase your vibrations.

Calling on the Angels

You know that you can call on Archangel Michael, but he’s not the only divine being that can help you with the process. Did you know that archangels are generals over the angels and powerful allies to assisting you with your spiritual awakening?

These mighty messengers of the divine are there to assist with your physical and spiritual eyesight. If you are unsure of who you should call on for help, then here is a list of the most commonly used spirit guides:

•Raziel

Raziel is an archangel that is known to supervise both the secrets and mysteries of the universe, and he can help you to develop your psychic abilities.

•Haniel

Haniel is known for her ability to help you become more intuitive and to improve your clairvoyance. She can help with your third eye-opening since she has close connections to the moon’s energy. Ironically, she is also a clairvoyant.

•Orion

Orion is a great teacher and guides into the spiritual realms, and he is a powerful ally to keep in your corner. He can help you to use the authorities of the universe to raise your vibration levels, which will also cleanse your energy as well as bring abundant blessings into your life.

•Metatron

To delve into the divine, you may need to cleanse your chakras and open your clairvoyance. The archangel Metatron can help you to release all the fears and negativity that holds you back from your spiritual gifts.

Final Thoughts on Developing Your Clairvoyance

We are all spiritual beings, and there is nothing wrong with you wanting to know more about the world we see and the one many cannot. Remember that each person will perceive information from spirit differently. Some will be psychics, while others tend to be more clairvoyant.

You may sense something, while others can see a vision of it. It’s all the same spirit working with you to guide you. Embrace the gifts and powers that you’ve been given and erase fear and negativity from your life. Lastly, remember that you have the archangels standing by ready to help you.

12 Traits of a Genuinely Honest Person

May 21, 2020 by Power of Positivity

Ben Franklin coined the phrase, “Honesty is the best policy.” Back in Ben’s day, honesty was important in relationships. It’s no different today. Truth-telling is important. You may wonder how to tell if someone is telling the truth or lying. So, what are the behaviors and traits of a genuinely honest person?

Here’s why we have trouble pinpointing them. Everyone lies.

Even if you say you’re an honest person, you probably lie every day without realizing it. If a friend buys you lunch and asks if you enjoyed the meal, you might say yes out of a desire to save the person’s feelings even though your food was cold and tasteless. On average, you get lied to 200 times a day. One study found that 40% of adults said they fib at least once a day, usually in small ways.

12 Behaviors of an Honest Person

1. Drops the profanity

You may have heard that the use of profanity means a person is honestly expressing their thoughts and opinions. In fact, politicians who believed this began using more profanity in hopes of appearing honest. Curious about this premise, researchers conducted a study to find out if it was true. They found that, in fact, the opposite is exact. Sincere people tend to use less profanity, not more. Honest people don’t need profanity to make their point or to convince you they’re being honest. They’re just honest.

2. Won’t use the word, “honestly”

If you’re talking with a person who peppers their conversations with “honestly” or “to tell you the truth,” they’re lying to you. This phrase may appear as being candid or straightforward, but it’s a dead give away of being dishonest. Liars also use phrases like “to be perfectly honest” or “let me be honest with you,” to convince their listener they’re sincere. This kind of qualifying language discredits the speaker and reveals their deceit.

3. Gestures correctly

Dishonest people tend to gesture AFTER they speak instead of during or before they talk. Everyone uses gestures, it’s reasonable to gesture while you’re talking. But when someone gestures at the wrong time, it’s a sign of deception. It’s as if the person is making up the answer as they go along, and their gesturing can’t keep up with their words. Honest people gesture in the right way and at the right time for emphasis, not because they are lying to you.

4. Normal voice tone

Liars change their voice tones in conversations. They may get louder as they talk. The more they talk, the louder they will get. Or they will lower their voice as if they’re telling you something in confidence. It’s as if the person feels defensive, and their pitch is revealing this to you as they continue to lie. It’s a dead giveaway when someone does this, so don’t believe them. You can spot an honest person in conversations because their voice will be consistent throughout the discussion.

5. Blinks normally

It’s thought that a person who is lying to you blinks more often and has longer blinks than a person who is telling the truth. Changes in their blinking patterns are also a sign of lying. This subtle clue is worth watching while you’re in conversations. It’s a pretty clear indicator the person isn’t being honest with you.

6. No throat clearing

Honest people use a normal voice tone without constant throat clearing or hard swallowing before they answer. A person who continually clears their throat before he answers your question, he is probably lying to you. He’s probably feeling anxious about lying, and this may cause his throat to feel dry out, so he needs to cough or clear his voice to talk.

7. Mouth looks normal

Honest people hold their mouths regularly during conversations with you. A dishonest person purses their lips or tenses their mouth while in chat. They may give you a fake smile or a half-smile. A real smile involves the eyes, not just the mouth. When a person smiles, there are wrinkles at the edge of their eyes, called crow’s feet, that will appear. A person who is fake smiling smiles only with their mouth, not their eyes.

8. Movements are natural

Non-verbal clues are often the best way to tell if someone is lying to you. If the person you’re talking to shuffles their feet or moves around in their chair or fidgets with the clothes, there’s a good chance they’re lying to you. But a liar may also become unnaturally stiff, freezing their upper body movements. In general, unnatural movements being either too stiff or too busy, are indications a person is lying to you.

Learn how to stay calm during an argument (even when you don’t feel it).

9. Pupils aren’t dilated

It’s often thought that when someone doesn’t look you in the eyes, they’re lying. But studies show that looking either to the left or right isn’t necessarily a sign of lying. Liars will look at you too much. Practiced liars maintain eye contact with a type of stare-down ability. When they do this, the pupils of their eyes will dilate, indicating they’re not being truthful.

10. An honest person looks relaxed, not moving too much or too little

If you’re in a conversation with someone who is lying, they will often wiggle or tap their feet nervously. Honest people are calm. They don’t shuffle their feet to distract you or out of nervousness. They’ve nothing to hide, so they aren’t worried you’ll find out they’re lying to you.

11. Uses non-formal language

Liars use formal language to cover up their lies. Saying, “I did not commit a crime,” instead of “I didn’t do it,” tells you that the person is working hard to cover up their lie. Liars use this formal way of answering questions to try to appear sincere and truthful. Honest people use ordinary, everyday language when they answer questions because they don’t have anything to hide.

12. Doesn’t give you too much information

When a person is lying to you, they’ll often repeat your questions back to you. They’ll give you lots of unnecessary details as if to overload you with information to deflect their lies. These are subtle but clear clues the person isn’t being honest with you. They’re stalling, trying to come up with an answer they think you will believe. It’s a classic indication of lying.

Final Thoughts on Identifying When You’re Dealing with an Honest Person

Figuring out if someone is an honest person isn’t simple. Many gestures get misunderstood as lying when the person is just nervous. It takes practice and the ability to get to know the person to understand whether they’re lying to you. Ask lots of questions, probe into what they’re saying to you. Look for inconsistent patterns in their speech, nodding yes when they say “no.”

Also, look at their attitudes and subtle movements. If someone is co-operative and ready to work with you to help you to get the truth, that’s a pretty good indication they’re being honest with you. They’ll be willing to share their ideas or brainstorm or provide details to solve the problem. Clear indicators that the person you’re talking to is lying will include looking down frequently, pausing, or being withdrawn, unnecessary head shakes, or shrugging.

Therapists Talk About 10 Healthy Ways to Cope With Anger Issues

May 21, 2020 by Power of Positivity

Do you ever find yourself lashing out in sudden or uncontrollable anger sometimes? Perhaps you know a coworker or a family member that has issues dealing with anger? We’re not talking about simple “tantrums” that may occur because of some type of annoyance. We’re referring to explosive, all-out, scary anger that can leave people confused about why you reacted the way you did.

If you’ve experienced this type of anger, you aren’t alone. Close to 9 percent of Americans (almost 22 million people) have had some uncontrollable moments of anger. It’s a major problem in this day and age.

If you’ve recognized that you have anger issues, congratulations! That the first step in fixing the problem. Now you need to find ways to cope with it.

Below are ten healthy ways that psychologists agree will help you deal with anger issues.

1. Calm Down Before Addressing the Issue

When you suddenly become angry or enraged, dealing with a problem in a civilized way is probably not where your head is at that moment. Your emotions are running high and you’re reacting instead of responding. Doing this won’t accomplish anything other than aggravating the situation more.

If you’re able to, remove yourself from the situation. Take time to calm down. It doesn’t matter if it only takes a few minutes, a few hours, or a few days. After your anger subsides, you can return to the place or person to work out the problem calmly.

2. Breathing Exercises

Breathing exercises are great for dealing with anger. They have both physical and mental benefits. When you get angry, your body sends “signals” to your brain signaling something similar to a “fight or flight” response. This is why you can have such an explosive reaction to a situation.

Breathing in and out helps to calm this response in your brain. Slow, steady breathing signals to your body that things are okay and there is nothing to be concerned about. This brings you to a calm state so you can resolve your issue without overreacting. There are several breathing exercises you can try, but in the heat of the moment, breathing in and out a few times is the quickest way to calm down.

3. Know Your Emotional Triggers

When you know your emotional triggers, you can make the choice to avoid situations that will make your issues with anger flare-up. While this isn’t a “solution” to your anger issues, it will at least keep you from blowing up until you can get a handle on it.

With this being said, some people aren’t aware of what their triggers are. It can take some time to be able to recognize them. Here are a few ways to spot your emotional triggers in a situation:

The situation makes you feel uncomfortable
You begin feeling things like shame, guilt, sadness
You feel singled-out and/or embarrassed
Certain needs like respect, fairness, and acceptance aren’t being met
You feel out of control
You feel misunderstood

Here are ten red flags that show when someone feels entitled.

4. Meditate

Meditation has long been regarded as a way to fight health conditions, psychological disorders, and pain. It’s also a great way to practice being calm, to reduce stress, and to control your anger. If you have issues dealing with anger, incorporating meditation into your life a few times a week can help you begin to manage your anger issues over time.

The great thing about meditation is that it’s easy to do, free, and can be done in the comfort of your own home at a pace that suits you. There is plenty of information online about how to start meditating. The key is to not give up – keep your sessions going and you’ll be surprised at how well you start handling issues that usually cause you to fly off the handle.

5. Think Before You Speak

You’d be surprised at how different your reaction would be to a situation that makes you angry if you just take a few seconds to think about what you’re going to say. Angry outbursts are usually done in the heat of the moment. As stated before, you react to the situation instead of responding to it.

When you force yourself to stop and think, your anger gets a “cap” put on it. Essentially, by focusing on your response, you delay the reaction which weakens the outburst. The longer you think, the more your anger will subside.

6. Lower Stress Levels

Stress has such a major effect on your life, especially on your emotions. When you’re stressed out, even the smallest things can set you off. In many cases, it can cause you to react in such a bizarre way that you regret your reaction almost instantly.

Any number of things in your life can contribute to your stress. In fact, stress can cause more problems than the ones you’re already dealing with, which will make you even more stressed. Getting rid of stress is easier said than done, but you must try anyway because your temper isn’t the only thing that stress will affect.

Research shows why it might be okay to go to bed angry.

7. Get More Sleep

A lack of the proper amount of sleep can indirectly lead to your issues with anger. The average adult needs from seven to nine hours of sleep. Without this amount, there can be short-term and long-term consequences, with the short-term affecting your anger issues and the long-term affecting your health.

Without getting too scientific, the reason that sleep deprivation leads to anger issues is that the amygdala (a gland that is responsible for emotions) doesn’t function correctly. It becomes more susceptible to negative emotions so anger gets a bit of a boost. The good news is that, as long as you aren’t deprived of sleep long-term, you can reverse this by getting a few good nights of sleep.

8. Don’t Let Anger Build Up

Unexpressed anger is sometimes called “pent up anger”. Many people keep their emotions to themselves. They are incapable or unwilling to express how they really feel. This allows their emotions to be directed inward and to simmer. The result is that eventually you’ll get full and the anger will boil over.

Pent up anger can cause a phenomenon called displacement. This can cause you to act your anger out on the wrong target. For example, you yell at a coworker because you had a fight with your spouse before you got to work. Avoid pent up anger by expressing what’s bothering you at the time that it’s bothering you.

9. Exercise

Exercise is a great way to reduce anger. Not only can it reduce anger at the time you’re angry, but regular exercise can help to control issues with anger long-term. Anything from a brisk walk to a few push-ups can be helpful in a heat of the moment situation.

Exercise helps to reduce stress levels and it does it rather quickly. It also triggers a chemical reaction in the brain. Exercise triggers the release of endorphins. Endorphins help to put you in a better mood, essentially stamping out your anger. Although any exercise will do, aerobic exercise is the best for stimulating endorphins.

10. Seek Professional Help

All nine of the above steps are “self-help” steps. They work wonders, but sometimes they may not be enough. Depending on how severe your anger issues are, you may need to seek professional help.

Uncontrolled anger issues can build into something dangerous. You may end up verbally and physically abusing people around you even though you don’t mean to. It may cause you to lash out violently towards people. It can wreak havoc on your life.

There is no shame in getting professional help. It’s better to get help than to drive away people that are important to you.

Final Thoughts on Dealing With Anger Issues

Anger is often a misleading emotion. It can be directed to the wrong person or invoked in the wrong situations. Even in the right situations, it can be downright scary. In many cases, you may find you aren’t even sure what you’re angry about.

For a while, people may understand that you’re just going through some things, but anger tends to get worse over time if it’s not dealt with early. Eventually, people will get tired of being abused, even your closest family members. They may distance themselves from you which can make matters worse.

Having to deal with anger problems is no way to live. That’s why following the steps above are so important. They are easy, self-managing steps but if you feel they aren’t working, remember that there is plenty of professional help available for you. With a little effort on your part, plus the advice from psychologists on the healthy ways to cope with anger, you can get back to having normal, healthy relationships with the people you care about.

12 Behaviors That Show a Man Has Lost Interest in A Relationship

May 21, 2020 by Power of Positivity

It’s normal for a relationship to have some ups and downs. Sometimes you feel madly in love with your partner, and other times you feel frustrated at them. But sometimes, there are indications that your relationship is in trouble.

Studies show that when a relationship breaks up, it can lead to depression, sadness, and loneliness. No one wants to end a relationship, but sometimes it happens. Relationships often fail within their first year. If the bond lasts up to five years, the chances of failure go down 10% every year.

You may wonder if your partner is having doubts or feeling disinterested. So, what are 12 behaviors that show a man has lost interest in your relationship?

12 Behaviors Reveal When a Man Has Lost Interest

1. Withdraws

Studies show that when someone has hurt feelings or feels like they aren’t being treated right, they will withdraw from the person or groups they feel rejected by. Your partner may withdraw emotionally by not sharing his thoughts or feelings with you. He may withdraw his affection or not want to have sex with you.

Additionally, he may start to withdraw physically, perhaps moving out or being busy with friends all the time. He may not be sharing that he has hurt feelings. Ask him if there’s something you did or said that had hurt him. If he’s unwilling to tell you or doesn’t show concern enough to repair the broken relationship, this is a clear sign he’s lost interest in the relationship.

2. Being overly critical may reveal lost interest

If your man is suddenly critical of you, blame-shifting or acting irritated at you all the time. He may be drifting in his love for you. His criticalness could just be his immature way of wanting to back out of the relationship. Instead of telling you honestly that he’s lost his interest, he makes it sound like it’s your fault.

3. Lack of concern

A general lack of interest in you or your relationship is a clear indication your man is drifting. There’s a typical kind of jealousy a person may feel when they think a relationship doesn’t mean as much to another person as it does to them.

If your man doesn’t show any kind of healthy jealousy about your relationship, if he’s doesn’t care to fight for the relationship, he’s probably lost the love. The best way to find out if this is true, of course, is to ask him. Press him about his lack of concern. Allow him to be honest about his disinterest. It’s best for you to find out the truth rather than to keep guessing while the relationship painfully limps along.

4. Slow to respond to your calls, texts or emails

If your partner isn’t responding to your texts or calls, he may be avoiding you or withdrawing from you. He may not want to talk with you or find out how you’re doing. Or if you’re the only one initiating calls or texts, this is an indication something is wrong.

His thoughtlessness isn’t a good sign, and you can’t try to keep the relationship together by always initiating. In a healthy relationship, there is an initiative from both partners.

5. He doesn’t plan

When a guy stops asking you out or planning unique dates, he’s lost interest in you and the relationship. He’s not making your relationship a priority or making an effort like he once did. Early in relationships, men typically show lots of attention, bring gifts, and planning little times together.

Over time, if they’re becoming disinterested, they lost their desire to make these efforts. If you’re the one who plans the time way or dinners out, you may want to reassess the relationship. He may be drifting along but lacking any interest.

6. He flirts with other women

Men with a wandering eye aren’t truly committed to their partner. They’re still looking around when they shouldn’t be. If your man is openly flirting with women when you’re around, it’s a really bad sign. He does not care enough for you to even try to act like he’s interested. You shouldn’t put up with that, but bring it up to him when you’re alone. If he denies it, then you have a problem.

If he’s sorry and wants to change, there’s hope for your relationship. Don’t cheapen yourself by making excuses for a partner who doesn’t want to change or who refuses to give up flirting. You deserve better than that.

7. He doesn’t want to talk about your relationship.

A man who doesn’t want to talk or work on a relationship is a man who’s not ready for a long term relationship. Relationships are hard work. There must be lots of conversations about priorities, values, money, and intimacy for the relationship to grow.

If your man changes the subject when you bring up this kind of stuff about your relationship or he shrugs off conversations, it’s a bad sign. If he’s non-committal about issues, it’s his way of saying the relationship isn’t that important. No doubt, he’s not ready for or mature enough for a long term relationship.

8. Poor hygiene

If it seems like your man isn’t really motivated to freshen up, it could mean he’s trying to put you off. No doubt, he’s lost that loving feeling if he won’t take the time to shower or shave. His lack of effort is a clear message. The romance may be dead or dying.

Don’t make excuses for him or say it’s just the way he is. Remember the earliest days of your relationship when he showed up looking sexy and smelling sweet. If that’s missing, it’s a sign his love is growing cold.

9. Lack of affectionate touching when he’s lost interest

If he doesn’t want to hug you or cuddle with you, it’s a bad sign. Affectionate cuddling and hugging are a normal part of an intimate relationship. If he acts put off by your hugs or kisses, this is a red flag.

Don’t mistake wanting sex as being in love. This is a physical desire, not the kind of emotional love you have in a relationship. Many women get this wrong, thinking a guy is interested in her when the guy is just lusting after her body without feelings of love.

If you’re sensing this, talk to your partner. If he denies it or shrugs it off, this is a sign he’s not invested in a long term relationship with you. Don’t walk, run. Find someone who truly cares for you and wants to have a long term relationship with you.

10. Don’t want to be around your friends or family

Part of a healthy relationship involves getting to know your partner’s family and friends. It’s a sign of a healthy relationship when your partner makes a priority of meeting and knowing your friends or family.

If your partner refuses to hang out with your friends or visit your family, it could be a sign he’s lost his desire to be with you and to be around the people that are important to you. He may choose to hang out with his own friends or family instead of yours. Or he may complain if you ask him to go with you to visit your family.

This action is a big red flag; you shouldn’t assume it’s normal. The behavior is a clear sign of lost interest and a lack of true concern for what’s important to you and what’s important to the relationship.

11. Doesn’t ask you questions about yourself or your day

If your man isn’t asking about you-how your day went, or how you’re doing with certain situations, there’s a good chance he isn’t interested in you and your life. Relationships should have the proper amount of give-and-take with equal concern for one another. If you’re the only one showing concern or care, it could mean your man is losing his interest.

Is he mostly interested in himself? Does he more about himself than asking you about yourself? These are indicators of a selfish person and an immature person who isn’t interested in a growing relationship.

12. Disrespectful towards you

Blame shifting, irritation, or a lack of respect for you are all signs a man is losing interest in you and your relationship. In a healthy relationship, your man cares about you and treats you with dignity and value. He cares about what interests you and finds ways to let you know he respects you. When his interest is dying, he may act like he couldn’t care less about you or what’s important to you. He will become self-focused and ignore you or your interests.

He may be downright rude to you, which can be hurtful but revealing as to where his heart is. Don’t put up with disrespect. It can quickly turn into contempt. A man who can’t respect you isn’t worth the emotional energy you spend on trying to fix the relationship. He’s lost interest, and you should move along, too.

Final Thoughts on Letting Go of a Man Who Has Lost Interest

Before making a clean getaway, have an honest chat with your partner. Try to reach the crux of the lost interest. Perhaps you can salvage the relationship if he also wants to. But If he comes clean about wanting to break things off, then you deserve more.

12 Tips to Help You Accept Compliments Gracefully

May 20, 2020 by Power of Positivity

You’d be surprised at how many people don’t know how to accept compliments gracefully. If you thought you were the only one, don’t feel bad. You are not alone.

It seems to be hard for people to just accept a compliment. The reactions and responses that are given are often awkward, surprising, hilarious, or even rude. The wrong answer happens so often that there should be a workshop on how to accept praise from others.

There may not be a workshop available, but we have some fantastic tips to help you work on your compliment-accepting etiquette. Here are 12 tips that will make you better at accepting praise gracefully.

12 Tips to Help You Feel More Comfortable When You Accept Compliments

1. Acknowledge the Person Giving the Compliment

One of the worst things you can do when someone compliments you is ignoring them. Ignoring a person that complimented you is cold and rude. People will quickly stop liking you. No one is saying you must have an extended conversation with the person, but even a small acknowledgment of their compliment is the right thing to do.

The first step to accept compliments gracefully is acknowledgment. Without it, none of the other steps in the list matter. So, when someone gives you a tribute, don’t just walk by like you don’t hear them or see them.

2. Say “Thank You”

The absolute best way to accept compliments gracefully is simply to say, “thank you.” That’s it – nothing more. Sometimes it can feel awkward to say only those two words. You may be left wondering what to do next. Should you return the favor? Keep the kind words going? Don’t worry – just act naturally, as you would if they hadn’t complimented you.

Simply smile and be humble about receiving the compliment. The person who gave you the praise isn’t expecting anything in return from you. Thank you are two powerful words.

3. Watch Your Body Language

Your mouth can say one thing, but your body could mean something different. You don’t want to send mixed messages when you’re receiving a kind word. The person complimenting you might feel as if they’ve offended you. Even worse, you don’t want them to think you’re smug.

The best body language in this situation is the approachable body language. Have good eye contact and a slight smile (to show that you like the compliment). Also, try to keep yourself “open” to the person. Don’t cross your legs or arms, and don’t try to “hide.”

4. Be Humble

When someone pays you a compliment, you should be appreciative that they took the time from their day to notice something beautiful about you. The way you respond is everything – you don’t want to come off as some stuck-up person who thinks they’re better than everyone else. This advice might sound a bit extreme, but that’s how people will feel about you if you can’t humbly accept a compliment.

To be humble, don’t respond with comments like, “of course I look great,” or, “what do you expect? These are designer shoes.” While this may be true, you still shouldn’t say it. If you make comments like these jokingly, that might be okay, but you again must watch your tone of voice to avoid coming off as stuck-up.

5. Be Genuine

You could do the three tips above, plus the rest of them in this list, but if you’re being fake, people will spot that from a mile away. Even if you think you’re the best liar in the world, sometimes people will still see right through you. There is no need to be disingenuous when someone compliments unless you don’t like compliments. However, like every other human on the planet, of course, you like them.

When someone is kind to you, you should genuinely appreciate that. After all, they didn’t have to spend a minute or two of their time on you, but they found it essential to do something to brighten your day.

6. Don’t Let Pride Take Over

There is nothing wrong with having pride in your accomplishments, but when someone gives you a compliment about them, don’t be so prideful that your response comes off as rude or arrogant. Sometimes people do this, and it’s not even on purpose. They may not realize the type of response they’re giving because their pride is blinding them.

Take pride in your accomplishments, but when someone compliments you, push your satisfaction back just a little bit so you can be more down to earth. Remember, even if only briefly, that you’re not better than anyone else. This humbling approach will help you accept a compliment gracefully.

7. Repay the Compliment

Repaying the compliment is a great way to accept compliments gracefully. Just as their praise made you feel good, yours can make the person feel good also. As long as it’s done in good taste, everyone walks away from the situation feeling like a winner.

Keep in mind that you need to keep the compliment genuine and straightforward. Don’t overdo it, or it will seem like you’re merely trying to outdo their tribute. For example, if someone says they like your shoes, you could respond with, “thanks! I like yours too!” However, only give honest compliments! If you don’t like their shoes, choose something else.

8. Don’t Be Overly Excited

A compliment is a small gesture of kindness and acknowledgment. That means it doesn’t warrant an over-the-top reaction. Besides thinking you’re a bit bizarre, you’ll make people think you are disingenuous. While you may merely be trying to show your appreciation, your over-the-top reaction can make people feel uncomfortable.

So how do you know when your reaction is just too much? Most compliments are done so in a “conversational” manner. Therefore, if your response is out of the bounds of a normal conversation, you’ve probably done too much. This point leads to the next tip on the list.

Here are ten red flags that show someone feels entitled.

9. Match Their Level of Enthusiasm

This bulletpoint expands upon the last tip. If you overreact, people are going to think you’re just a bit off. However, if you under-react, that can leave them feeling a bit confused. They could believe that you misunderstood their compliment or that they may have unintentionally said something wrong. Either way, under-reacting is not a way to accept compliments gracefully.

Instead, try to match their enthusiasm. This includes their tone, volume, and rate of speech. This doesn’t mean you have to fake it or analyze the compliment before responding. Just match their energy. If you allow it to flow naturally, it’s not hard to match energy levels.

10. Don’t Toast Your Toast

There is a right way and a wrong way to receive a toast. Many people aren’t aware of this, and they don’t mean any harm when they receive their toast the wrong way. However, it’s very ungraceful to toast to yourself. In other words, if the toast is to you when everyone else raises a glass and drinks from it, your glass should remain firmly on the table.

Drinking to your toast is like complimenting yourself and patting yourself on the back for the compliment. Instead, smile, nod, and accept the toast. Drink after your toast is over. Even better – return the compliment by toasting someone else.

11. Don’t Attack the Compliment

Sometimes insecurities can cause you to question a compliment, but attacking compliments is not a way to accept compliments gracefully. When people give compliments, it’s coming from their hearts. Attacking the compliment is equivalent to discrediting their judgment. Even worse, it can come off as condescending.

Say, for example, your coworker says, “you nailed that presentation!” You then respond by saying, “if you thought that was good, you must not have seen very many presentations.” While you didn’t intend to cause harm, this can make the person feel like you’re saying they’re not qualified to compliment you. Avoid this by only accepting the compliment.

12. Don’t Go Fishing

You may have heard the saying “fishing for compliments”. This habit isn’t a good thing. When someone compliments you, just take it. Don’t try to stretch it out or pull more out of the person. If they tell you that your dress looks nice, don’t ask them what they like the best about it. That just makes the conversation awkward and makes you look self-centered. Simply accept the compliment, then change the conversation or move on.

Final Thoughts on How to Accept Compliments Gracefully

Most of the time, when people respond wrong to a compliment, they don’t mean any harm. They simply don’t know how to accept the compliment. Some people may even be slightly embarrassed by a compliment. However, with practice, you can get good at taking them.

The 12 tips above are great starting points in accepting praise gracefully. You don’t have to do them all. Start with a few and keep trying them until you find the ones that work best for you. Before you know it, you probably be able to accept compliments more gracefully than you’d ever imagined!

How Grandma Jean Taught Me to Live it Up Without Regrets

May 20, 2020 by Kristen Butler

NOTE: This is a fable, fiction story with a great life lesson about living life without regrets.

On the first day of distance learning, our professor challenged us to get to know someone on campus that we didn’t already know. Social distancing made that tough, in fact, almost impossible. I couldn’t see my friends, how could I possibly meet someone new?

He assured us that everyone was feeling this way, but we could still connect and meet other students through online groups. So, I joined a few and posted an update talking about my little social experiment.

To my surprise, I received a response almost immediately from a very wrinkled, old lady with a huge smile. A profile picture that could light up a room, but she had to be well into her 80’s. I couldn’t even believe she was using social media, let alone being a college student? I was intrigued.

After my response, she introduced herself immediately, “Hello dear, I’m Jean. I’m 87 years old. It’s nice to meet you. Since I cannot physically give you a hug, here’s a virtual one. I hope you are staying healthy during this unprecedented time.”

I was not expecting such a positive response. Even though I wasn’t exactly feeling positive, I responded back enthusiastically. “Yes, I’m doing fine. Thank you for the hug. I hope you don’t mind me asking, are you really a college student?”

She responded, “Yes, I am. This is my 3rd year. I have always dreamed of having a college education and now I am getting one.”

I couldn’t believe what I was reading. This was going to be an interesting assignment.

That day I chatted for hours with Grandma Jean. And as the stay at home orders continued to be extended, we continued to keep in touch.

Our chats grew into zoom talks where she shared her “time machine wisdom”, as she referred to it. Her optimism was hypnotizing. She was a person who was at the highest risk during this time. In fact, I never heard an ounce of fear in her voice.

She was full of faith and gratitude, was fun, and made the best of each long, lonely day. She enjoyed her days and made the most of it, even though she was home.

Over the course of a few months, Grandma Jean became someone very near and dear to my heart. Her life stories were full of adventure and wisdom. Even her days in quarantine were still filled with happiness.

Her personality was contagious and her positive thoughts occupied my overthinking and worrying mind. She made me see the silver lining in life, even during quarantine.

Meet a grandmother who sets a world record, proving that age is just a number.

For my end-of-the-year project, I had to give a speech about what I learned about living without regrets from my new friend.

“Grandma Jean taught me that age is just a number. We do not stop learning and playing because we are old, we grow old because we stop learning and playing. In order to stay young at heart, be happy, and achieve your dreams, you have to laugh and enjoy each day – even the difficult ones. Keep your dreams in your heart.

Never let them go, no matter how old you are. When you lose your dreams, you die. So many people are walking around, dead inside, because they have given up on their dreams. Live life without regrets.

Most importantly, I’ve also learned that there is a huge difference between growing older and growing up. Anyone can grow older, that doesn’t take effort, talent, or ability.

Growing up is always looking for the opportunity to improve and waking up each day with a positive mindset. Even on hard days, one positive thought can change your whole day. It doesn’t mean you have to be happy all the time, just trust that better things are coming.”

Do you know someone like Grandma Jean who lives without regrets? Tag and tell us about them in the comments.

Counselors Explain 10 Habits of Parents Who Raise Successful Kids

May 20, 2020 by Power of Positivity

Raising children is not for the faint of heart. These little wonders don’t come with a manual, and by the time you figure out how to do things right, they are grown and gone. Thankfully, counselors have discovered what things that parents teach to make them grow from successful kids into thriving adults.

10 Habits of Parents of Successful Kids

There are no perfect parents in this world; there are only those who try with everything within their powers to raise good kids. Some children are more complicated than others, and for those challenging kids, you will need to keep reinventing your techniques. If you need a little parental help, then here are ten habits of parents who ensure they’re raising successful kids.

1. They Help Build Esteem

Successful kids are almost always the product of hard work. They have parents behind them that have helped to build their esteem. It’s easy to become so frustrated with life, even at a young age. Kids face pressures that adults often label as inferior, but in their world, these events are traumatic.

If you want your child to be successful in all aspects of life, then you must build their self-esteem. Even when they hit those rough patches, you will give them the skills and tips they need to overcome. Once they learn they did something once and can do it again, they will feel a sense of pride.

2. They Don’t Let Them Quit

Children are notorious for wanting to start something and then never finishing it. They may want to get involved in a sport or instrument, but they become bewildered after a short period. Parents mustn’t let children quit just because they are tired or have lost interest.

If they learn early in life that they can bow out when things get rough or they simply don’t want to do something, they will continue that pattern throughout life. Raising successful kids always starts with a drive and determination to keep going even when you feel like quitting. It will really be beneficial when they enter the working world.

3. They Teach Them Respect

Respect is taught at an early age. To get your children to respect you, there must be firm boundaries that they are expected to adhere to. Let them know what you will and will not tolerate.

If a child learns at the age of three that backtalking is not permitted, they will grow up with that mentality. Teaching principles such as these early on is the best way to raise successful children. If you want them to respect you, then you must also respect them.

A successful parent will never call names, put them down, or say anything derogatory, no matter how angry they become. Additionally, the child will automatically learn these words and actions are not permitted.

4. They Have Open Lines of Communication

A parent’s first choice is to yell, punish, or get angry when a child doesn’t do what they are told. However, you must step back and look at the situation through their eyes. Your child is subject to mood swings, bad days, and feeling off just like you.

The best way to combat when your child is acting out is to talk to them. Keep those lines of communication open. You must establish that they can easily talk about their feelings and find a resolution. Communication skills will follow them through life, and they are essential for working and having good relationships.

5. They Spend Time with Them

Your children need you. They don’t want to see you in passing as you are on your phone or computer all the time. Carve out a specific time that is for them each day. They can say how they want to spend their time.

They may want to play games, color, ride bikes, or watch a movie. If you just designed a particular hour like 6-7 pm every evening, make sure they know that they are important enough to be a part of your day.

You don’t want them to grow up with inadequacies because they were lonely or didn’t have time for them. Successful kids had parents who made time for them no matter how busy their life.

6. They Have Chores

Many parents are divided on the chore issue. Having responsibility doesn’t mean that a child must clean the whole house; it just means that they need to help. Having chores is essential for raising successful kids.

Do you want your child growing up thinking that they don’t have to do anything, and they will be waited on hand and foot? No! You want your child to know the value of hard work and why it’s essential to do an excellent job in the smallest of tasks.

7. They Teach the Value of a Dollar

Some kids are natural savers, while other children tend to love to spend their money the minute they get it. Giving your child an allowance and teaching them about savings accounts and a rainy-day fund is always advisable. They should know how it feels to save and wait to buy the one thing they’ve always wanted.

Children have lots of opportunities to put back money. Think of all the birthday and Christmas funds that they receive. Unless they need something, they should put it all in the bank but a small amount to spend. Many children can buy a nice car when they are 16 years old because their parents helped them to save.

If you just hand everything to your child, they will never know the value of a dollar. Many parents find that when a child must work for something they want, then they tend to respect it a bit more. There’s nothing wrong with a small allowance and utilizing tools to help them save.

8. They Give Firm Discipline and Direction

Gone are the days of corporal punishment, but you must discipline your children in ways that are effective for teaching. Discipline is a chance to redirect a child from a wrong behavior by showing them what to do that is right. Teach them that for every action, there is a consequence.

They should know that if they don’t make their beds and take the trash out of their room, they will be punished. Discipline should always be done in love and never in rage. Remember, they are little humans and make mistakes too. They just need a gentle nudging to learn that life isn’t always easy, and you need to do your part.

9. They Teach The Kids to Acknowledge their Feelings

The old philosophy that men aren’t allowed to cry, and girls cry too much is psychically disturbing. Your children should know from the toddler years that it’s okay for them to express themselves.

Now, you may need to show your children appropriate ways of expression, as anger is the most natural emotion to show. However, if you raise a male child to think it’s not okay to cry, then they will build anger and resentment inside. Allowing children to acknowledge their feelings and voice their concerns can help them prepare for the real stress when they get into corporate America.

10. They Enforce the Value of a Good Education

If you don’t make school valuable, then your children won’t value their education either. There should be firm guidelines for school from kindergarten on. Let them know that no matter what schoolwork and their learning come first.

Successful kids almost always have a parent behind them who is pushing them to be all they can be. Teach your children that college is not an option but rather a requirement for a good life. Once they have these things ingrained into their brains, then they will learn that school is an obligation that they must attend.

Final Thoughts on How Parents of Successful Kids Provide Firm Foundation

Raising successful kids is not an easy job. You need all the parenting tips and tricks you can find. Look to others who have raised good kids and ask them their secrets. Maybe they did something that you can efficiently utilize with your children.

Remember that everything you do, either positive or negative, will have an impact on your child and their future. Children require constant care and attention, and you must be steadfast on the rules and discipline for a good outcome.

Above all else, don’t forget to have fun and spend as much time with your babies as you possibly can. You will blink your eyes, and they will be grown. The real regrets happen after they leave the nest. So many people say they didn’t learn how to be a good parent until after their children were raised.

One of the best tips of parenting advice that anyone could give you is not to miss all the little moments as they will soon be gone. You don’t get a second chance at this monumental task. So you must ask yourself, are you raising a successful child?

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