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5 Ways To Stop Struggling And Suffering (And How To Live A Fulfilling Life)

June 22, 2021 by Lakeisha Ethans

Do you often feel as if you’re struggling? Do you worry that you’ll never live a fulfilling life? Are you trapped in your mind or circumstances and can’t see a way out?

Don’t fret. It’s normal to feel a little lost sometimes, and it’s not the end of the world! Here are 5 ways to stop struggling and suffering and 4 ways to live a fulfilling life.

5 Ways To Stop Struggling And Suffering In Life

1. Acknowledge That You’re Struggling

Often, people try to downplay their emotions or talk themselves up by insisting they’re not struggling. On the one hand, this can come from a place of genuine desire to promote positive thinking. On the other, it’s not getting rid of those feelings – it’s just repressing them.

Studies indicate that those who bottle up their emotions and try to repress their struggles suffer from it, while those who express their problems feel more positive afterward. Acknowledging that the problem exists allows your brain to confront it, lets you express those complex feelings, and validates what you experience.

Here are some ways to acknowledge that you’re struggling:

Simply say that you are struggling or what your problem is out loud; “I am struggling” or “I am upset because I lost that promotion” are some examples.
Write down everything you feel and all the struggles you face in a private journal; don’t filter yourself and write absolutely everything that comes to mind, no matter how silly it sounds.
Talk to someone you trust and who cares about you regarding your struggles, or seek a counselor who can listen.

2. Take Responsibility for Creating a Fulfilling Life

It’s easy to blame all sorts of things for the problems you face. It’s tough to hold yourself accountable, especially for things like your own suffering or struggling. You may blame:

Your family
Childhood factors
Your situation
Environmental influences
Your friends
Those who have wronged you
Your disorders
Your disabilities

While it’s fair and even necessary to acknowledge how all these factors have influenced the person you are today, that doesn’t mean you should continue to blame them forever. At some point, your life falls entirely into your hands.

You are the person at the sails of your life. You have the ability to heal, to do the most with what you have, and to choose the way you outwardly respond to different events and the people around you.

This is not to say that all your problems, including those initially caused by things outside of your control, will go away as soon as you hold yourself accountable. But it does mean that it’s time for you to get your positive thinking going and accept that you are the only one with the ability to sculpt your future and your attitude towards your struggles!

3. Remember The Goodness In You

There are many things in your life you may wish you’d done better on. You may wonder if you’re truly a good person or if the people around you even like you. When this happens, you can empower yourself by remembering the goodness that naturally lies in your soul.

Shambhala Buddhist beliefs involve the concept of “basic goodness,” which refers to the tradition of belief in inherent basic goodness within everyone and the universe, no matter how negative or chaotic the world or life seems. No matter what your religion is, it’s important not to lose sight of the knowledge that good exists in the world.

Despite everything you’ve been through, there are things about you that are good, and there are things in the world that are good. With the internet, you can easily find charities, acts of kindness caught on camera, and even simply adorable, loving animals that can remind you of the positive things the world holds. Keeping positive thinking by maintaining this belief can help reduce feelings of suffering or struggle.

4. Grow Accustomed To Change

Change is a common part of life, but it’s part of why many people feel like they’re struggling. Some people lament change and hate the fact that their life has been altered. But listen closely: your life is in a constant state of change! No matter what you’re doing, it’s changing because change is constant and unstoppable.

Being uncomfortable with change can hurt you in the long run, as it often means you’re uncomfortable with life. It can also make you:

Spend too long dwelling on the past instead of focusing your energy on moving forward
Wallow in regrets and lost opportunities instead of learning from mistakes
Hold onto things for too long instead of realizing it may be time to let go and move on.

Change is inevitable, and it’s happening every second of the day. This means that bad times will change to good and good to bad, and that’s just how it is. Learn to embrace and encourage change instead of resisting it, and you’ll be much better at riding life’s waves.

5. Do Things Differently for a More Fulfilling Life

As you get used to accepting change, you’ll also discover that so much power lies within you. If something is causing you to struggle, you can simply decide to do things differently. You can change things about your life! Here are some examples of things to do differently to stop your struggles:

· Emotions

When a negative emotion comes, it is always good to acknowledge it. But then, instead of stewing in it, you can assess it. Is this emotion reasonable? Is the situation warranting it? How else can you react to the situation more positively? Changing how you feel about things takes practice, but you’ll soon find that you naturally have more positive thinking about the world.

· Routine

Life is full of routine, and some of them may unknowingly be contributing to your suffering. Furious at everyday traffic? Take a different route or leave at a different time. Sick of feeling like you have nothing to do at night? Take up a new hobby or add a nightly activity to your routine. Tired of waking up feeling exhausted? Set an earlier bedtime. There are so many possibilities!

· Perspective

Your perspective is one of many. If your perspective focuses on your suffering and your life’s negative aspects, you can choose to find new ways to look at the world. Appreciate the things around you and find silver linings in even the darkest clouds. Ask or listen to others who have different perspectives on life. It’s incredibly empowering to realize how much a paradigm shift can change your life!

4 Ways To Live A Fulfilling Life

1. Perform Acts Of Kindness

Being kind to others allows you to shift the focus away from yourself and onto others. While you need to prioritize yourself, when you have the time to spare, using it to devote yourself to helping others is a wonderful way to feel fulfilled.

Research has found that positive social behavior can decrease feelings of stress while improving mood, strengthening relationships, and even leading to better physical health! Here are some ways to perform acts of kindness:

Be a shoulder for someone to cry on
Volunteer with or donate to a cause you believe in
Do a favor for someone else.
Give a gift to someone you care about
Give a massage to a significant other

2. Leave Your Comfort Zone

Remaining in a bubble where you only ever feel safe and secure sounds nice, but it can stifle you and prevent you from reaching your full potential or fulfillment. It’s always nice to have order in your life, but you could do with a challenge, too!

Research has found that people who leave their comfort zone enjoy more positive progress in their personal learning journeys. It gives you:

New experiences
Tough lessons
Additional insight
More options in life
Chances to find passions

So every day, do something that puts you a little outside of your comfort zone. Learn to challenge yourself and get comfortable with discomfort. You will always learn more and be happier by doing more than doing less, and no one feels fulfilled from being bored.

3. Prioritize Your Health

A healthy body makes for a healthy mind. It sounds “lame” to have to be physically healthy to be mentally healthy, but health allows you to live longer and enjoy more things without suffering from them. Here are some ways you should prioritize your health:

· Exercise

It would help if you were exercising regularly. 150 minutes of elevated heart rate per week is all you need, so get started on scheduling some physical activity. You don’t need to hit a gym, either – dance your heart out, play sports, do some gardening, or even go for a brisk walk!

· Eat Well

You don’t need to have a perfect diet, but eating balanced meals and making mindful food choices will allow you to feel better. Limit your unhealthy treats, so they truly feel like rare rewards, don’t skip meals, and eat good, reasonable servings.

· Get Enough Sleep

A lack of sleep makes you feel terrible, and it’s hard to feel fulfilled when you feel awful! Make sure you’re getting at least 7 hours of sleep every night, and if you’re still tired after that, see a doctor find ways to help!

4. Go For Your Dreams

You only get one life, and if there’s something you’re passionate about or something you’re dreaming of, you should go for it! While your passions and accomplishments can’t solve all your problems, they can certainly contribute to feelings of success and fulfillment.

Of course, achieving goals is easier said than done, and it’s easy to go about it the wrong way. Here are some tips for achieving your dreams:

Create measurable, reasonable, and deadlined short-term and long-term goals
Surround yourself with people who support you and your dreams
Join communities of people who have similar dreams
Learn to take calculated and reasonable risks with healthy backup plans
Don’t let anyone ridicule your dreams.
Remember that progress isn’t linear, and it’s okay to have both bad and good days as long as you keep learning and don’t stop moving forward.
Let yourself rest now and then, and don’t overwork your efforts to the point of burnout.
Keep your expectations challenging but reasonable.

Final Thoughts On Some Ways To Stop Struggling And Suffering To Live A Fulfilling Life

There are many ways to overcome your struggles and create a fulfilling life. Your unique life journey can lead you there if you put effort into it. The power always lies within you!

Forgive a Cheater, But Never Forget…

June 22, 2021 by Chris Butler

Should you forgive a cheater?

Infidelity is a very delicate topic, but plenty of people around the country know the pangs that come along with this act of betrayal. It’s not a new phenomenon, but it creates a deep wound when you find out that someone you love had a physical relationship with someone else. So should you continue a relationship with someone who cheats or send them on their way?

When your partner is in the wrong, how can you forgive their act and continue the relationship? Another thing you must consider is if it’s even worth trying to repair. Remember the old saying, “once a cheater, always a cheater?”

So, if you use the mentality that a tiger never changes its stripes, you might second guess your decision to forgive them. Plus, there is the self-dignity aspect, as some people believe if you take a person back once they’ve cheated, you’re permitting them to do it again.

Should You Forgive a Cheater?

It feels good to think that you’ve forgiven someone who has done the unthinkable to you, but breaking fidelity isn’t so easy to get over. You know that you deserve better and more from a relationship, but there’s always the ties that bind. For example, if you have children, a long history, or financial commitments, then it’s not so easy to send them packing.

If you’re considering forgiving your cheating partner, there are some things that you need to consider. So here are some questions to ask yourself.

1. Have They Cheated Before?

History always has a way of repeating itself. One of the most significant indicators of future behaviors is the actions of the past. If this person has a history of cheating, don’t fool yourself into thinking that things will be different.

Don’t ever think the problem was you or something you’ve done. If there’s an issue, your partner needs to communicate with you about it and not go elsewhere for a fling. Relationships are complicated at best, and if you can’t turn to each other, is it worth saving the relationship?

2. How Is Their Demeanor?

Attitude is everything when it comes to cheating. Is your partner apologetic towards you and truly feels remorse for what they did? You must remember they’re human and will make mistakes, but if their attitude is not regretful, it’s an issue.

A person who isn’t sorry for what they did should be given different considerations. They will cheat again; they need the opportunity. Another issue is when someone denies and acts like it didn’t happen, especially when you had proof that it did. You may not want to forgive a cheater that pretends like it was no big deal.

3. What Type of Cheating Did They Engage in?

With the creation of online dating and the entire virtual world, there are many different types of cheating. Someone can step outside of the relationship emotionally, and some consider that infidelity. To be classified as an affair, one must have a physical relationship, but that doesn’t mean that it lessens the blow of any other types of affiliations.

Each couple establishes boundaries and beliefs in their union. You may consider it a horrible mistake if your mate talks or texts with someone they met online. Decide what you consider cheating, and before you forgive a cheater, you must weigh the gravity of the situation. Most people are more eager to forgive those that have emotional affairs more so than physical ones.

4. How Would They Act If You Cheated on Them?

Look at the situation through reverse lenses for a minute. How would this person act towards you if you were the cheater? While they may be in the hot seat now, how would they be if the shoe were on the other foot?

5. Do You Have the Time and Patience to Work Through Things?

Before you decide to forgive them, do you have the time and patience to do all that it requires? For instance, you will likely need counseling, a cooling-off period, and lots of conversations with each other about the relationship? Is this person worth all the effort that fixing things requires, or is it better to send them on their way?

6. Can You Truly Forgive Them?

Many folks say that they can forgive their partner for cheating, but they don’t truly forgive them. If you harbor ill feelings towards them in your heart, then the relationship will never work. To truly forgive someone means that you don’t think about it 24×7 and harbor resentment for their actions.

Now, keep in mind that it doesn’t mean it won’t hurt, but you can’t replay the events like a loop in your brain. Instead, you must forgive and move on. Are you strong enough to get over such an act of betrayal and have a future with this person?

7. Is It Possible to Repair the Trust You Once Had?

The biggest issue with forgiving a cheater is the trust between you two has been destroyed. Unfortunately, repairing that broken trust isn’t going to be something that happens overnight. In fact, it can take years to rebuild something once it’s been lost.

According to Smart Health Women, trust issues can develop overnight, but it often takes a lifetime to overcome. Once an individual has been cheated on, they often live with the residual pain and become untrusting of future partners too. In addition, the article says that this person usually has insecurities, jealousy, and paranoia, which will hurt the relationship.

8. Is Your Confidence and Self-esteem Destroyed?

While it’s impossible to predict the future and how you will feel, you can tell if what’s been done has destroyed your confidence and self-esteem. Some people flat out don’t deserve your forgiveness, and this is especially true if the relationship has been nothing but rocky. However, if a person is willing to get counseling, eager to ask for your forgiveness, and terribly sorry, then you might be able to work through this issue.

When their act causes you to change your views of yourself and the world around you, then you should think twice. You need to rebuild your self-esteem, and it might be easier to do that if they’re not in the picture. This all goes back to whether you can genuinely forgive them or not.

Some people have the unique ability to let things roll off their backs, but other folks can’t get over something so quickly.

9. Are They Trying to Repair Things?

Evaluate the entire situation from the time you found out until now. Is this individual doing everything they can to repair things with you? Their attitude, eagerness for counseling, and willingness to try speaks volumes.

Someone who is genuinely remorseful is going to do everything they can to make it up to you. However, someone who feels justified in their decision won’t care. Someone selfish or narcissistic will undoubtedly pin this error on you, so why would you want to forgive a cheater who acts like that?

They can make you think that your actions caused them to have their needs met elsewhere. According to Mental Health Matters, those with a diagnosis of narcissistic personality disorder often feel they’re entitled to cheat. They have no remorse for the situation, so they can and will do it again.

10. Are They Worth It?

If possible, you need to remove yourself from the current situation and look at the big picture. Is this person and the relationship worth it? If you’ve been together for ten years, have three kids, and outstanding debt, you might feel differently than if you’ve only been together for a year with no ties.

Each situation is different. You know the person you’re with, or at least you thought you did. You must decide if they’re worth putting the time and effort into repairing this relationship. There’s something broken in the union, or they would never step outside the relationship.

The chances are that this whole situation has little to do with you and so much more to do with them and their feelings.

Final Thoughts on Forgiving a Cheater and Whether You Decide to Move Forward in the Relationship

Let’s face it, people cheat. A study conducted by Health Research Funding Found that infidelity happens in at least 60 percent of relationships. That staggering number is, no doubt, why the divorce rate is so high.

It takes a strong person to forgive a cheater, and the relationship may or may not be salvageable. You must consider the type of cheating involved, their attitude towards the events, and the future. Can you truly forgive this person and continue the relationship?

You will need counseling and time to heal such wounds, but many people flourish after such an event. Some even say it’s the wake-up call their relationship needed. However, since each person handles stressors like this differently, you must decide if you can move on from such a blow to your self-esteem.

When you forgive a cheater, it doesn’t mean that you must continue the relationship any further. In many instances, forgiveness does more for you than it does for them. However, you don’t have to choose to live with someone who has broken trust with you and has an overall lack of respect.

15 Habits That Cause Inhibition and Unhappiness

June 22, 2021 by Power of Positivity

Have you ever wondered if your inhibition is holding you back from being happy? Sadly, your hang-ups can not only drain you mentally, but they can wreak havoc on your emotions.

If you feel stressed and anxious most days, it could be your fears that are causing you much duress.

It’s normal to have some anxieties in life as everyone is different, and you come with their own thoughts and belief system. However, for the person who struggles with inhibitions, you believe that you have the gift to read others’ minds, and you think they’re always having derogatory thoughts towards you.

The good news is that you can let go of these hang-ups if you’re willing to put in the time and effort to work on you. It would help if you learned that the challenges that come along with life are beyond your control. Remember, you cannot regulate things like whether it rains or snows, genetic conditions you were born with, or your intellect.

How Inhibition Can Hold You Back

Though you may influence others, you will never control other adults’ thoughts or actions. Wouldn’t it be great if you always got what you wanted in life? Sadly, that’s never going to happen. As you start on this journey towards becoming a better you, keep these things in mind:

In some circumstances, being unhappy or miserable will be inevitable.
You may be the cause of much of your pain.
Only you have the power to stop your mental torment by controlling your hang-ups.
You can have a good life if you stop creating your own suffering.
You need to define your values and goals and not let anyone detour you from them.

Fifteen Ways Your Inhibition is Interfering with Your Joy

Did you ever consider that your thoughts and actions might be harmful to you? Many people cause useless suffering to themselves. Here are some of the behaviors that can zap your happiness.

1. You Bite Your Tongue to Avoid Conflict

Rather than speaking up about something you know is or isn’t right, you choose to stay silent. You’re afraid to stand out from the crowd and be different. Sadly, you watch many injustices done and do nothing about them.

2. You Miss Out on Meeting Wonderful New People

Your shy and often self-conscious personality makes you afraid to step out of your comfort zone. You could meet new and exciting people and enjoy more experiences if you could only let go just a little bit. Stop worrying about the possibility they might not like you.

3. You’re Afraid to Change Jobs for Fear of The Unknown

You’ve probably passed over many jobs or even a career path because you’re scared. You don’t trust in yourself enough to learn something new or to leave a job that you’ve stagnated in just because it’s familiar.

4. Traveling to New Places Is Out of The Question

You tend to choose the same vacation spots, maybe even identical cabins or hotels each year. When it comes to eating out, you have your favorite restaurants where you order the same thing. You are terrified to go to new places because you’re afraid you won’t fit in or people will stare at you.

5. You’re Afraid to Ask for Raise or a Promotion

You’ve been looked over for a promotion or raise for many years. You refuse to say anything or stand up for yourself no matter how much you deserve it. You’re so afraid the boss may get mad and fire you that you become a doormat where they can walk all over you.

6. You Don’t Speak Up for Yourself

You let people walk all over you, and it hurts you deeply. Still, you would rather keep friends and relatives close that are toxic than to have no relationships at all. You’re incredibly fearful of losing this relationship, so you let them treat you any old way.

7. You Can’t Say No

One of the biggest problems that you have is that you don’t know when to say no. Your schedule is already full, and you’re exhausted. Yet, when anyone asks you to do a favor, you don’t have the power within yourself to say no.

8. You Take Responsibility for Things That Are Out of Your Control

Quit blaming yourself for things that are out of your control. You put a lot of baggage on your shoulders when it isn’t your burden to bear. Of course, you can’t help it if your parents get a divorce, your spouse is sick, or that the weather is terrible outside. You will find comfort when you learn that you’re not at fault for everything.

9. You Put on An Act for The Outside World

You wear a mask every day when you go to work because you’re afraid for people to see the real you. One person in this entire world is uniquely you, and no one should ever make you feel like you must hide.

You can be free to play the music you want, wear the clothes you love, and it’s okay to drive a small gas, nice car. Stop conforming to what others think is a perfect world and live for you.

10. You Put Others Ahead of Yourself

You’re a kind person, and you often let the needs of others come before you. Your children have more clothes than they know what to do with, but it’s been three years since you’ve bought yourself anything. It’s good to take care of family and those around you, but at some time, your needs must come into play. Self-care is essential.

11. You Hide Your Emotions

There have been many times you’ve wanted to cry or get angry, but you keep your emotions stifled. It’s okay to show people that you’re not happy all the time. If you are afraid to show your feelings, then you’re not real with others.

12. You Try to Please Everybody

Being a people pleaser is one of the most significant inhibitions that folks must overcome. It doesn’t matter what others think of you. Your opinion is what counts most, followed by your spouse. You can try your entire life, but you will never please all the people all the time.

13. You Ignore Your Intuition

How many times has your gut tried to tell you something, but you won’t listen to it? You’re so afraid to trust yourself that you don’t even listen to your intuitive nature trying to help you out.

14. You Don’t Believe in Yourself

Sadly, you don’t need anyone else to put you down or feel less than because you do a good enough job of this by yourself. One of your significant hang-ups is that you don’t see the value and worth you carry. If you don’t believe in yourself, then how can you expect others to?

15. Inventing and Dwelling on Painful Inner Dramas

Your inhibition may come along with an anxiety disorder. For instance, you just received word that there was a terrible accident two miles from your job. The interstate is shut down.

The first thought that comes to your mind is that your spouse travels this way to work. Your mind instantly goes to ideas of how you would carry on if they died. Then your mind leaps to a conversation yesterday, and you assume they probably fell out of love with you anyway.

In the next five minutes, you’ve convinced yourself that you need to start job hunting or you will live in poverty because you’ve probably lost your spouse. You have a vivid imagination, and it’s killing you mentally. You should seriously consider using these talents to write a screenplay, but it won’t do you much good in this life.

Your imagination can spin tales that are scary, outrageous and will rock your peace of mind.

Final Thoughts on Shedding Your Inhibition So You Can Be Happier

Every person has experienced one of these fifteen misery makers a time or two in their life. No one is perfect, but you can become better at recognizing when you’re contributing to your own suffering. Once you realize what you’re doing, you can stop and switch mental gears so that you can be happier.

Try using this acronym to help you identify issues: S.T.O.P.

S – See yourself as others see you and stop self-sabotaging you. If you want to change then, you need to be self-aware.
T – Take control over your life. If you make a conscious decision that it’s time for you to change, it will be easier to accomplish.
O – Options. You have options. What things can you do differently to change? Remember, you’re one decision away from an entirely new life.
P – Practice new mindsets. Once you alter your perspective, it’s time to put this new way of thinking to fair use. Practice new ways to change old habits.

When you changed your inhibition, then you can change your life. Are you ready to get rid of some of the baggage that’s holding you back? Today is a brand-new day, and it’s time to be a brand-new you. After all, you deserve to be happy.

Experts Reveal 6 Ways To Overcome Fear And Live Life To The Fullest

June 21, 2021 by Lakeisha Ethans

Fear is a potent emotion. It can cause people to falter, give up, and allow opportunities to slip by them. Perhaps it can even stop someone from being able to live life to the fullest. Life would be so different if everyone stopped allowing fear to be their guiding force.

If you find that you are often held back by fear, then there’s good news for you: you can break free from this mentality! Here’s how experts reveal 6 ways to overcome fear and live life to the fullest.

1. Stop Looking For Negatives

There will always be negative things in life. People who live in fear often hold a spotlight on those negative things, using them as a reason to not step out of their fear. You might even actively seek out bad things as a justification for why you’re too afraid to live fully. Here are some ways you can stop looking for negatives in your life, according to life coach and author Chris Ellis:

· Don’t Focus On Little Problems

Small stuff will go wrong all the time, and little things will be out of place often. While some of them are worth your attention, the fact is that genuinely significant issues are ones with enormous stakes behind them. Small problems with small consequences often iron themselves out!

· Stop Looking For Things You Can Fix

It’s tempting to seek to improve absolutely everything in your life, claiming that you can only really move forward if you fix it all first. But not only is that impossible, but it’s also just unfair! There is beauty in being happy with what you currently have, and there is wisdom in knowing what to work on and what doesn’t have to be perfect. You don’t need to keep fixing things before you’re worthy of success.

· Don’t Fixate On The News

You can and should keep yourself up-to-date on current events. But you shouldn’t use bad news – which the world is full of – as a reason to not live your life to the fullest. In fact, if news programming affects your fears significantly, you may want to cut down on home much of it you consume. Studies show that reading or watching the news can reduce positive thinking. So make sure you balance out your bad news with good!

2. Address Your Fears Directly

You cannot live life to the fullest when fears hold you back.

Many people try to ignore or even repress their fears, either in denial or to hope that they’ll go away. Of course, this isn’t something that happens. The more you bottle up your fears, the more likely they are to come out to bite you.

Studies have found that naming, confronting, and being honest about negative emotions can lead to the resolution of those emotions or even decrease their intensity. Basically, if you want to approach your fears in a positive way, you have actually to admit that they exist – and even address them! This can seem a bit frightening at first. Life coach and writer Elyse Santilli recommend the following methods to address fears directly:

· Hold Fears To Scrutiny

Find a fear that plagues you the worst out of all others in your life. Then, hold it up to the light of your mind. Talk to yourself about your fears – why do you believe this fear is true? Is that realistic? Can you know this thought is accurate? Are there other perspectives? What would the best version of you say?

· Compare Fears To Gains

Instead of focusing on your fears about something in your life, try writing a list of all the gains you could earn if you stepped outside of that fear. How will you grow? What achievements will you have? How much wiser will you get? You may find that the gains far outweigh all your fears.

· Reframe The Fear

Did you know that the human nervous system cannot easily differentiate between excitement and fear? So the next time you feel fear, change the narrative – you’re afraid, yes, but you’re also excited for the opportunities and the lessons you’ll learn from being brave!

3. Find Inspiration

When you’re overwhelmed by fear, your thoughts are governed by it. All you can see and think of is that fear and the anxious things you think will happen as a result. It’s time to break out of that and find positive thinking. How? Through inspiration!

Being inspired by the world around you reminds you of all the great possibilities that await you outside of your bubble of fear. Mentally Strong People Podcast host and mental strength trainer Amy Morin outlines these great ways to find inspiration in your life to overcome fear:

· Find People To Look Up To

Lots of people can inspire you in different ways. Some will have the perseverance that makes you strive to do better. Some have achieved goals that you want to reach. Others have tales of how they rose from the bottom. Finding a wide variety of people you can look up to is a great way to find inspiration.

· Find Support

Talk to people you trust and care about you and tell them about your fears and goals. You can also seek communities of people who are working towards similar dreams. Not only will the people in your life keep you accountable, but they’ll also be there to support you.

· Remind Yourself Why You Do It

Whenever you’re tempted to throw in the towel, stop and think about yourself and why you decided to go on this journey. Why do you want to achieve these goals? Why are you willing to do all that it takes? Write a list of reasons that you want to keep going and use that to inspire yourself. As it turns out, sometimes great inspiration comes from within!

4. Use Your Thoughts Productively and Positively

Fears are part of your thoughts, and they take up a lot of your mental energy. Instead of wasting your thoughts on them, try and spin your beliefs to more positive ground. Here are some ways that counseling psychology expert, courage coach, and author Tess Marshall recommends you positively use your thoughts:

· Don’t Devote Excess Energy To Fear

It’s okay to feel bad sometimes. But there’s a limit to how much energy you should give to fear. Please don’t give it excess attention, time, or energy. Save all of that effort for finding solutions and living your life!

· Make Positive Thinking Dominant

Negative thoughts only attract more negativity. By making sure your dominant thoughts are usually positive, you’re attracting more positive thinking into your life.

· Think Of Victories

Whenever your fear gets to you, think of your achievements. Please think of how well you did, how capable you are, and how amazing it felt to succeed. Hold onto that and use those thoughts against fear.

· Don’t Get Stuck On What You Lack

You’re always going to be “missing” something in life. Instead of being caught up in scarcity, fill yourself with gratitude. Gratitude is known to work wonders on positive thinking, according to studies, so live your life that way and leave fear behind.

5. Make A Plan

So, you now know that you definitely want to leave fear in the past and truly live your life. Great! But how can you go about it? Morin recommends making a plan of some kind or listing down goals. It’s common knowledge in academic circles that goal-setting is crucial to positive success! Here are some tips for making plans:

· Make A Timeline

Generic goals like “I want to publish a book one day” are too loose and vague, and there’s nothing in them that boosts productivity. Create a general timeline of when you want to achieve different steps along the way to that big goal. “Someday” isn’t a definite time, and your fear can allow you to always keep “someday” in the future.

· Set Short-Term Goals

Breaking down big goals into smaller chunks is a great way to ensure that you don’t get overwhelmed. It allows you to easily follow a path towards success made up of small, easily noticeable checkpoints. Your fear will be less powerful when you can clearly see the progress being made.

· Look Before You Leap

Before you make huge decisions or take big risks, make sure you have a plan for what you’ll do in the event of failure. For example, you shouldn’t quit your job right away if a failure in your goals would render you homeless. Think about things and formulate a plan before going for your dreams. There’s a difference between being brave and being foolish!

· Take Steps Daily

Find ways to make little steps towards your goals every day. Turning goal progress into a habit helps relieve some fear as you see just how well you can work towards something!

6. Respect and Believe In Yourself

If you truly want to overcome fear, you must believe that you can, and you must value yourself enough to try. A lack of self-esteem and constant self-deprecating won’t get you anywhere. Here’s how Ellis recommends taking steps to respect and believe in yourself to overcome fear:

· Trust In Yourself

You’ve had your fair share of bad days and bad experiences, and yet you emerged through them all unscathed. You have overcome all the struggles of your past, and you can continue to break through obstacles and barriers, even if it’s difficult.

· Know Your Power

You have strengths, skills, and abilities that make you a capable person. So whenever your fear rears its head, remember how strong and amazing you are. Reassess negative thoughts about yourself – why do you have those beliefs? Isn’t it time to put them to rest?

· Know Your Worth

Over the past years of your life, you may have received many subliminal or even direct messages that degrade your worth. But no matter what anyone says, one thing remains true: you are worthy of love, success, of your dreams, and happiness. You, just as you are, are enough.

Final Thoughts On Some Ways To Overcome Fear And Live Life To The Fullest

Life is beautiful when lived to the fullest. But fear, anxiety, and worries of all kinds can stop people from seeing that beauty. It’s easy to get lost in fear and allow such emotions to hold you back. You deserve better than to be trapped in one place forever. So step out of your comfort zone, face your fears, and go live the life you’re worthy of.

Kind Bus Driver Rescued a Baby Boy Wandering Down a Busy Road

June 21, 2021 by Kristen Lawrence

A heroic Milwaukee bus driver saved a baby boy wandering alone in the cold.

While Irena Ivic drove her usual route on December 22, 2018, she spotted something shocking on a freeway overpass. A baby boy was walking alongside a busy road without any adult supervision. He had no shoes or coat on even though it was freezing outside.

She immediately stepped into action to rescue the poor boy. Irena was driving in the opposite direction, so she parked the bus and ran across the road to help him. In the video footage, you can see her running in front of moving traffic to save the baby.

When Irena got to him, he was crying, obviously lost and scared. She scooped him up and brought him to the warm bus. The Milwaukee County Transit System(MCTS) bus driver was in a state of shock. How could any parent allow their baby boy to wander alone in frigid temperatures?

Not to mention, the boy toddled down a bustling road improperly dressed for the weather. He was wearing a red onesie and a diaper, hardly appropriate for the weather. When Irena got onto the bus with the child, she said,

“Oh my God. Oh my God. No – I’m shaking.”

Passengers couldn’t believe it either. While they waited for help to arrive, one passenger offered her winter coat to wrap around the boy. Irena talked soothingly to the boy, caressing his hair to keep him calm. Everyone on board the bus helped to keep the baby boy warm and comfortable until first responders arrived.

They didn’t have to wait long; firefighters and police officers quickly arrived at the location. When they walked to the bus, they saw the baby boy was already asleep in Irena’s arms. Clearly, he was exhausted from walking down the busy roads and trying to keep his body warm.

The baby boy was then reunited with his father.

While he had been exposed to freezing temperatures, the toddler suffered no injuries. The baby boy went missing after the mother had a mental health crisis, according to authorities. She’d left him outside, and the boy must have gotten confused, prompting him to wander the streets.

They tracked down the father and brought the baby boy to him instead.

“I’m just grateful I was in the right place at the right time,” Ivic said at a ceremony honoring her for her heroic actions.

Ivic said she used to be a teacher and has children of her own, so she adores kids. She felt happy she could reunite the sweet baby boy with his dad. Irena is definitely a hero, and this is a perfect example of humanity at its finest.

According to the MCTS, this was the tenth time bus drivers found a lost or missing child in recent years.

Other times Milwaukee bus drivers rescued children in the area.

Jenny Mitchell was driving her route in Milwaukee’s north end when she spotted two young children alone. She decided to pull over and ask if they needed help. The children, ages one and five, appeared lost and scared. Immediately, Jenny sensed something was wrong. She asked where they were trying to go, and they pointed in every direction. They said they’d left their house where a babysitter had been watching them. They were now trying to get to their aunt’s house. So, Jenny called the police to help them make it to their destination.
(MCTS) Driver Cecilia Nation-Gardner noticed a young boy wandering through traffic after running away from school. She’d just pulled up to a bus stop on May 15, 2019, when the child began crossing the street in front of cars. Cecilia began frantically honking her horn to alert the drivers, but most didn’t stop. So, she got out of the bus to chase down the boy. She took the six-year-old’s hand and brought him to the bus to wait for the police. Officers later learned the boy had a disability and wandered away from school. They later reunited him with family members. The miracle of the story was that Cecilia normally didn’t travel this area on her route. She’d been in the right place at the right time.
Another time, Milwaukee bus drivers saved two lost children on the same day! Cecilia once again came to the rescue of one of the children. In the morning hours of July 5, 2019, she noticed a young girl walking alone along Route 15. The girl was crying, carrying a blanket, and dressed in pajamas and slippers. The girl told Cecilia she was looking for her mom, who lived in another state. However, the girl’s relatives were searching for her. They soon made it to the bus and took the girl back home.
On that same day, MCTS bus driver Cressida Neal drove for an early shift at 4:40 am. She suddenly spotted a baby boy wandering alone near an intersection. The boy was barefoot, scared, and crying. Cressida told him to come on the bus, where she gave him water and comforted him until police arrived. Apparently, the boy had been spending the night with his grandmother. He wandered away in the early-morning hours and got lost. Luckily, the police took the baby boy back to his family.

Final thoughts on the Milwaukee bus drivers who went and above and beyond the call of duty

Not all heroes wear capes. Most of the time, they’re everyday people like you and me. The MCTS bus drivers have a history of excellence, going far beyond their job requirements. Many of them had saved children from danger, like when Irena Ivic rescued a baby boy wandering the streets. Unfortunately, parents face mental health issues and leave their children unattended. But luckily, guardian angels are looking out for them.

It seems that in Milwaukee, at least, the bus drivers are always willing to help children in need. It’s stories like these that restore your faith in humanity and remind you that heroes walk among us.

10 Lifelong Impacts of Growing Up in a Dysfunctional Family

June 21, 2021 by Power of Positivity

There is no perfect childhood. However, growing up in a dysfunctional family can give you wounds so deep that it affects you for the rest of your life. What defines dysfunction, and how do you know if you fit into this classification?

Growing up in a dysfunctional family can mean many things. In most instances, the home was unstable and full of conflict. Commonly, there is abuse, neglect, and dependency on drugs or alcohol. Sadly, there is often a combination of these things that make the child suffer every day.

One family may struggle to find stable housing due to substance abuse issues and run-ins with the law. While another family may have a mental illness that leaves them unable to work, they turn to illegal activities to make ends meet. 101 scenarios can fit into this category, but all these dysfunctions dramatically impact a child who depends on their parents for everything.

Ten Lifelong Impacts of a Dysfunctional Upbringing

When you see an adult who has issues, it’s almost always because childhood affected them profoundly. The pangs of abuse radiate throughout the decades and can leave this person severely altered for life. Were you a victim of some abuse or neglect growing up? Here are some of the lifelong impacts that this trauma can have on you.

1. Trust Issues

One of the first and foremost problems that growing up in a dysfunctional family brings is trust issues. When you cannot trust your parents who gave you life, you grow up with a sense that you cannot trust anyone. Often, children of parents with substance abuse issues are made promises that the parent can’t keep.

These children live complicated lives because there is often violence and being raised around unscrupulous people. They learn they must look out for themselves at an early age.

2. Learn To Lie

A child who grows up in such an environment full of turmoil learns to lie. They lie for their parents to cover up their actions because they fear child protective services will step in and take them away. Lying becomes a mechanism to shield themselves from the dangers the parents have brought their way.

Sadly, dishonesty becomes such a normal part of this person’s life that it interferes with relationships and jobs in adulthood. Pathological lying, according to the National Library of Medicine, is rooted in a deep-seated mental health issue.

3. Poor Communication Skills

Since no one ever wants to address the elephant in the room, people in this family learn to brush things under the rug. Communication skills are lacking because no one wants to deal with issues, so they spend little time interacting. When parents are involved in illegal activities, they don’t openly talk about their children’s lives and feelings.

Kids growing up in this environment learn that it’s a don’t ask, don’t tell the type of situation. This can severely stunt their ability to communicate in the future.

4. Problems With Anxiety and Depression

The National Institute of Mental Health states there are forty million adults in this country, or one in five people, that suffer from anxiety disorders. The erratic or unpredictable conditions that a child grows up in can affect their nerves. They’re constantly on guard because they never know what will happen next.

Though they grow and have a place of their own that’s safe, the brain has been hardwired to live in a constant state of alert. The fight or flight mode is not so quickly left behind, mainly when your body is used to higher stress hormones like cortisol.

5. Feelings Of Being Unimportant and Unworthy

Self-image can be badly destroyed when you grow up in dysfunction. Even as you grow and have healthy relationships, the past can certainly put a damper on your happiness. Being in a relationship with someone who has so much baggage from their childhood is challenging.

This individual will need constant reassurance and support to help them move past this damaged thought process. It can take years of therapy and aids like journaling and positive affirmations to help overcome such a troubled upbringing.

6. Shame

It’s hurtful to grow up with such chaos all around you. Sadly, many children learn to protect and defend their parents and their actions. Even into adulthood, you may find that you’re still supporting them. Many people won’t talk about their past because it’s too painful to recall.

7. Bury Feelings

One thing you don’t do in a dysfunctional family is let your emotions out. When you cry, scream, or have a temper tantrum, it can make the abuse worse. The child who remains quiet and stays out of the path of the abuser fares better than the one who challenges them.

Children quickly learn that they must suppress their feelings and emotions not to become a target. This pattern is not broken easily, and the suppression can continue until you know to break the cycle. The emotional aspects of feeling unimportant and unloved sting deep.

8. Poor Financial Management

Many folks who grow up in chaos never learn to manage money effectively. Having no positive example of paying the rent, cable, electricity, and water can have a considerable impact. Many of these families lack financial stability, so the child never learns the importance of not spending all they have on frivolous purchases with no thought for tomorrow.

9. Learns Violence

Have you ever heard that the abused become an abuser? It’s sadly quite common for someone who was abused to become an abuser. The reason is that they never learned effective ways to handle conflict.

If they grew up in a home where they were beaten with a belt to get them in line, they believe that this is the proper way to discipline a child. Hitting never resolves anything, and it only tends to make matters worse.

Growing up in an environment where violence was used for conflict resolution causes problems. You must stand up and say, “It stops here!” You don’t have to let the cycle of abuse continue.

10. Self-Medicating with Drugs and Alcohol

You’re a product of your upbringing. Many people don’t know how to deal with all the things that happened to them in the past, so they try to self-medicate the pain away. The downside to this thought process is that the numbness wears off when the intoxication is gone, and then you must still face reality.

Growing up in a dysfunctional family is no picnic, and rehabilitation centers across the country are full of people who don’t know how to cope with what happened to them.

Three Ways to Get Over the Mental Chaos

You’ve identified what it means to grow up in dysfunction, but now you need practical tools to overcome these things. You can and will overcome them if you put some effort into healing. It’s not going to happen overnight, and you may struggle with overcoming these things for the rest of your life.

However, you should know that it can be done when you get the proper help. Here are some ways that you can help to heal from the past.

•Counseling

The most effective defense you have against your past is learning to process what happened. Many times, you have feelings of guilt and shame that need to be addressed. Counseling is an effective outlet to helping you overcome this trauma.

•Practice Meditation and Mindfulness

Learning to live in the present is hard for someone who was always on edge. However, meditation is a great tool to help you purge negativity from your mind. Don’t let the past rob you of your future.

•Incorporate Movement into Your Daily Routine

When you exercise, you release potent endorphins in your body that help you to have good mental health. Often chemical imbalances are to blame for bipolar disorder, anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues. You can improve your state of mind by moving your body more.

Final Thoughts on Growing Up in A Dysfunctional Family

There is no perfect childhood. Even if a person says their upbringing was wonderful, there are always things to overcome. You must be careful because the cycles of abuse become so commonplace that you can become the very thing you loathe.

If you have children, remember they’re watching your every move. Do you want them to grow up with the same neglect and feelings of despair that you did? What happens in a dysfunctional family is hurtful and wrong on many levels, but there is a way to overcome it.

You’re past doesn’t have to define you a minute longer than you allow it. You have the power to overcome the hurt and pain, and you can live a normal, healthy life. It’s all about your mindset and getting the help you need to overcome the unthinkable.

Study Proves How Rising Early Decreases Depression

June 21, 2021 by Power of Positivity

A new study shows how rising early can reduce a person’s risk of major depression by 23%. A groundbreaking genetic analysis reveals that waking up just one hour earlier can produce these results.

The journal JAMA Psychiatry published the article on May 26, 2021

Researchers from the University of Colorado Boulder and the Board Institute of MIT and Harvard led the study. It included 840,000 people, one of the most extensive studies of its kind to date. The research provides solid evidence that chronotype – a person’s tendency to sleep at a specific time – impacts depression risk.

It’s also one of the first studies to determine the change in sleep habits required to influence mental health. Many people have experienced drastic changes in their lives and sleep patterns during the pandemic. As more people have switched to working and attending school from home, it’s led many to push back their bedtimes. Perhaps this new study will help shed light on the importance of going to bed and rising early.

“We have known for some time that there is a relationship between sleep timing and mood, but a question we often hear from clinicians is: How much earlier do we need to shift people to see a benefit?” said senior author Celine Vetter, assistant professor of integrative physiology at CU Boulder.

“We found that even one-hour earlier sleep timing is associated with significantly lower risk of depression.”

Prior observational studies showed how night owls have twice the likelihood of developing depression as those rising early. This holds no matter how many hours they sleep. However, many people with mood disorders have difficulty falling or staying asleep. This makes it harder for researchers to determine whether the mental illness causes insomnia or vice versa.

The new study may have found the answer.

Past studies have had several flaws which skewed results:

some of the sample sizes were too small
others relied on questionnaires that covered only a single time point
they didn’t consider environmental factors which can impact both sleep timing and mood

However, there was one large, long-term study that included 32,000 nurses in 2018. The study, performed by Vetter, found that rising early led to a 27% reduction in depression risk over a four-year time period. However, the findings left out a crucial question: How early should people wake up to reduce depression?

So, in this study, researchers wanted to quantify exactly what being an early riser means. They had two main goals: to determine whether rising early truly protects mental health and what waking time provides the most benefits.

To do this, lead author Iyas Daghlas, M.D., analyzed data from the DNA testing company 23andMe and the biomedical database UK Biobank. Then, Daghlas used a method called “Mendelian randomization. This technique investigates causal relationships between modifiable risk factors and health outcomes using genetic variations.

Daghlas, a recent graduate from Harvard Medical School, says this:

“Our genetics are set at birth so some of the biases that affect other kinds of epidemiological research tend not to affect genetic studies.”

The research found that over 340 common genetic variants impact a person’s chronotype. One of these includes variants in the PER2 gene, known as the “clock gene.” Experts estimate that genetics plays a role anywhere from 12-42% of our sleep timing tendencies.

The researchers then analyzed deidentified (removing data that could identify patients) genetic data on variants from 840,000 people. This included data from 85,000 people who had worn wearable sleep trackers for seven days. It also included 250,000 individuals who had answered questionnaires on sleep preferences. This gave researchers a more detailed picture, down to the hour, of how gene variants impact our circadian rhythm.

The study found that rising early greatly reduces depression risk

The largest of the samples revealed the following:

around a third of the participants identified as early risers
9% reported being night owls
the rest fell somewhere in the middle
the average sleep mid-point was 3 AM, meaning they went to bed at 11 PM and woke at 6 AM

After gathering this information, the team then analyzed data from another sample. This one included genetic information, anonymous medical and prescription records, and surveys about diagnoses of major depression.

Finally, the team used novel statistical techniques to ask the million-dollar question. Do those with the habit of rising early due to a genetic predisposition also have a lower depression risk?

The answer? A definitive yes.

The study found that with each one-hour earlier sleep midpoint, the risk of significant depression fell by 23%. The midpoint refers to the halfway point between bedtime and wake time.

So, let’s say someone normally falls asleep at 1 AM. If they went to bed at midnight instead and slept the same amount, they’d have a 23% lower depression risk. If they fell asleep even earlier, at 11 PM, their risk would fall by about 40%.

Researchers are unsure if these benefits would apply to those already in the habit of rising early. However, for the night owls or people somewhere in the middle, going to bed and getting up earlier would help.

10 Ways to Awaken Your Inner Morning Person and Be More Productive

Final thoughts on how rising early benefits mental health

Prior research suggests that getting up early decreases depression due to having more light exposure. People who rise with the sun receive hormonal benefits, which can boost mood. However, experts believe that societal norms also come into play. Having a circadian rhythm vastly different from other people can feel isolating and depressing.

“We live in a society that is designed for morning people, and evening people often feel as if they are in a constant state of misalignment with that societal clock,” said Daghlas.

He also said that to confirm whether rising early can reduce depression, a large randomized clinical trial is necessary. “But this study definitely shifts the weight of evidence toward supporting a causal effect of sleep timing on depression.”

If you’d like to get in the habit of rising early yourself, take this advice from Vetter:

“Keep your days bright and your nights dark,” she says. “Have your morning coffee on the porch. Walk or ride your bike to work if you can, and dim those electronics in the evening.”

15 Behaviors Reveal That Someone Leans Toward Introversion

June 21, 2021 by Power of Positivity

Are you an introvert or an extrovert? The two personality types are opposites, and it’s easy to identify which type you’re based on a few key characteristics. People who gravitate towards introversion prefer to keep things simple.

Unlike the extrovert who likes to mingle and keep people close by, the introvert would rather be alone and enjoy the peace that comes with solitude. Carl Jung was a Swiss psychologist and psychotherapist who believed that every personality was made up of four facets: thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and perceptions. He was the one who originally came up with the idea of the human personality, according to Psychologia.

He was the one who coined the phrases introversion and extroversion through more than two decades of research. Jung wanted to merge Sigmund Freud and Alfred Adler’s psychological findings, where he formed his theories in 1948. Though his discoveries were groundbreaking in psychology, many of his works didn’t get published until he passed.

Jung forever changed the mental health world by introducing personalities and analytic psychology. Today, both psychiatrists and psychologists still use his founding studies to help patients understand and cope with their mental health.

Fifteen Behaviors That Indicate Introversion

Things have certainly changed in the world of psychology, especially in the past few decades. The stigma is beginning to lift as people learn that they should embrace their differences and seek help.

Some of these individuals are mistaken to have depression, especially since this personality tends to be reclusive. Thankfully, it’s not sadness but rather their makeup and how they are hardwired.

Here are some other habits of the introvert that you should familiarize yourself with:

1. Must Charge Internal Battery

One of the reasons why an introverted person prefers to be alone is because it gives them a chance to recharge their batteries. It wears them out to be around a large group where everyone is talking and mingling. They need quiet times so that they can reflect and refocus both their mind and their body.

Have you ever used rechargeable batteries for your electronics? It’s a similar process with these individuals. They become drained by life, especially when they are pushed to their limits. So, they must be alone to rejuvenate. They plug into solitude and peace and quiet to refresh themselves.

2. Very Guarded and Private

Privacy is essential to the introvert, and they don’t like to answer any questions about themselves. They tend to get frustrated with people who tell everything they know. Some may think that introversion makes a person stuck up and not friendly, but nothing could be further from the truth.

They are not the kind of person with social media, or if they have these accounts, they would never post anything personal online for all to see.

3. Prefers Low Key Activities

Going white water rafting or climbing a mountain probably isn’t going to be an activity an introvert engages in. They love simple things like watching TV or reading a good book. Their appreciation for low-key activities also extends to people.

They prefer to hang with those who are modest and don’t engage in drama. Introverts often choose people just like themselves to have as friends.

4. Enjoys Quiet, Solitude, and Being Alone

You won’t hear music blaring from the introvert’s cars or homes, as they prefer peace and quiet. They don’t need to be with friends to be entertained as they love flying solo.

They’re the kind of person that can go out to eat all alone or enjoy a movie without any friends in tow. Their simplistic lifestyle and need for solitude allow many of these individuals to live in rural areas. It’s okay if there’s no neighbor for miles as the location’s tranquility turns its crank.

5. Always on The Outside Looking In

One might describe an introvert as someone who is on the outside looking in. They would instead observe than engage in activities. These people are often good judges of character, so they tend to watch and observe before interacting.

In a business meeting at work, they’re over in the corner, hoping no one calls on them. They don’t do large groups, so even in essential situations like work, they tend to stay outside and let others handle negotiations.

6. Keeps the Inner Circle Small

Due to their nature that prohibits them from opening up to others, their relationships are usually few. They don’t let many people into their inner circle, so they prefer to have a couple of good buddies they can trust.

Family is usually essential, so they allow certain members to join their circle. These individuals don’t see the need to have more than a select few friends.

7. Functions Better in Small Groups

When it comes to introverts, they prefer to stay away from social situations. Some may think they’re too withdrawn or have a challenging personality to get to know. However, there is a biological behind introversion.

According to the National Institute of Health, the brain of the introvert is wired differently. Social signals don’t flow normally in their brain, and they tend to be guarded. They prefer to stay in smaller groups with fewer stimuli.

8. Prefers Face-to-Face Interaction

Forget phone calls and texting as this person prefers to handle things face-to-face. While they may love modern technology, they are old-school in their methods. Since they’re cautious, conversations on the phone won’t allow them to see the person and read body language, which is especially important.

If you have a conversation with them on the phone, they won’t talk long, and they will have very few things to say.

9. Generally Quiet and Reserved

Introverts like to listen more than speak. You will often see these people in careers like a therapist because their listening skills are superior. They make great spouses and friends as they always seem to make others feel at ease.

Since many people talk non-stop and don’t allow others to get a word into a conversation, this aspect of the introvert is a breath of fresh air.

10. Think Long and Hard Before Speaking

Many people accuse them of not responding or listening when they speak. However, their pause to answer stems from the fact that they prefer to think before they talk. They are very calculated, so they weigh their words wisely.

Remember, this individual doesn’t like drama and prefers to stay more subdued, so they usually have few words. So, when they do speak, their words are meaningful.

11. Prefers to Be Home

Rather than going out and socializing with people, those who display traits of introversion tend to be more of a homebody. According to the National Institute of Health, these people would rather engage in activities like writing or quilting as they can be done from the comforts of home. They also make great IT professionals and other careers where technical expertise is necessary.

12. Don’t Like Group Activities

Since this person is a loner, they don’t like to work in groups. Being alone allows them to focus and not become overwhelmed with social distractions from peers. Work at home jobs is perfect for this person because they feel the most comfortable in their home environment.

13. Cautious in Relationships

Whether a friend or a lover, the introvert is extremely cautious about getting involved with anyone. They’re not quick to share any details of their life, so letting people inside is often a challenge. However, once they open their heart to someone, they are very loyal and committed and tend to stay in the friendship/relationship for the long haul.

14. There’s No Time for Small Talk

Small talk is just a waste of their time. They prefer to be engaging in something, even if it’s just a good book. You won’t see this person sitting around “shooting the breeze” as they have more important things to do. It’s not that this person is rude or unfriendly; it’s just that they don’t need all the social stimulation that others crave.

15. A Calculated Risk Taker

Don’t count on this individual to make any decisions at the spur of the moment. They’re very calculated risk-takers, and they think long and hard before making decisions. These people are the ones that drive sale professionals crazy because it may take a few weeks to a month to decide on the right automobile or other major purchase.

Final Thoughts on Introversion

Whether you’re introverted or extroverted doesn’t matter. Both have enduring characteristics that people love, but introversion tends to be a more subdued personality.

Nevertheless, you must identify these classic traits in yourself, your spouse, and other family members. Not only will it help you to enhance your relationship, but it will help you understand how the other person thinks and feels.

16 Signs It’s Time to Let Go of a Toxic Partner

June 21, 2021 by Deborah Tayloe

It’s a basic human need to have a romantic relationship. Nonetheless, the person you consider your soulmate jeopardizes your well-being. So how do you know when to break away from a toxic partner?

You must guard your heart if you see these red flags.

Sixteen Warning Signs of a Toxic Relationship

Just the thought of falling in love with a beautiful person may send your heart soaring. Although, as your relationship matures, you see the best and worst sides of each other. Of course, every couple has its rocky moments, but the good should always outweigh the bad.

Are you and your significant other compatible? What are some clues that your togetherness is doing more harm than good? Here are 15 signs it’s time to walk away from a toxic partner.

1. Communication Breakdown

Excellent communication is the lifeline of any relationship. If you and your person aren’t having meaningful conversations, it’s a red flag that something is wrong. Couples in love value each other’s opinions and are eager to hear about what’s going on in their minds.

Of course, any couple can get too busy or be angry at each other briefly. However, a toxic partner may stop listening to you and disregard your feelings. They may even become belligerent, eerily silent, or verbally abusive. It would help to consider that this person isn’t good for you anymore.

2. No More Emotional Support

The beauty of being with a partner is knowing that they have your back and you have theirs. When the going gets rough and you feel like you’re a failure, their loving support reminds you that you can make it. You know your lover is holding your hand whenever you feel down or in need.

You don’t have that safety net if you have a toxic partner. Instead of being your best cheerleader, they are harmful and make you feel even worse. You don’t need someone who can’t support you emotionally and uplift you.

3. Dishonesty

The foundation of healthy relationships is trust and honesty. When those are broken, the whole structure will fall. Are you and your mate transparent and honest with each other?

When little white lies start compiling into bigger ones, and things are swept under the rug, it breaks down trust. If you constantly must second guess your toxic partner’s motives or stories, how can you feel secure in the relationship?

Do you keep catching your person in lies, and they refuse to own up to their responsibility? If they chronically lie about one thing, what other things are they hiding? Maybe you need to evaluate your exit options.

4. Total Disrespect

Another essential facet of a committed relationship is mutual respect. You and your mate may not agree on everything, but you respect one another’s feelings and opinions. When they appreciate you, you are their top priority, and they are quick to apologize if they’ve inadvertently hurt you.

The relationship may turn toxic if they’ve lost their respect for you and take you for granted. You deserve to be respected by the one who says they love you. If not, don’t tolerate the disrespect anymore and walk away with your pride intact.

5. Your Relationship is Chronically Stressed

Anyone who says their relationship isn’t stressful is oblivious or lying. Of course, it takes a lot of work and determination to keep a relationship healthy, which involves pressure. However, without some stress, neither of you would learn, grow, and evolve as a couple.

On the other hand, your partner should not be a source of avoidable and chronic stress for you. According to an article by the National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health, chronic stress can harm physical and mental health. If your health declines because your person is overloading you with anxiety, you may have a toxic partner.

6. Jealousy

Has the green-eyed monster set up camp to terrorize your relationship? While being somewhat jealous of your person’s attention is normal, it can destroy a relationship if it’s a constant problem. Unfortunately, so often, severe control issues are masked as jealousy.

Does your mate make you feel more like a heavily guarded possession than a lover? Are they so paranoid and jealous that they can’t go anywhere or have any friends or family around? These are signs of an unbalanced person who is not only toxic but may also be dangerous.

7. Irresponsible Financial Deals

Are you in love? Contrary to romantic myths, a healthy relationship requires more than love. Just remember that romance without finance isn’t happening.

No, this doesn’t mean that money rules your heart. A relationship built on greed and materialism is doomed to fail, too. However, you want your partner to be responsible in work and financial management.

Some toxic partners are reckless spenders who can bog you down in debt and other financial ruin. Take notice if they are spending money erratically and are always expecting a bailout from you. Consider breaking ties before they ruin your credit and bankrupt your savings.

8. Your Support Network is Dwindling

We all have different personalities, so understandably, some may clash. Likewise, you may have the occasional family member or best friend who doesn’t get along with your mate. The difference is that mature people know how to be civil, even if they don’t like each other.

This situation becomes problematic when your lover can’t get along with hardly any of your family and friends. Your mate may be the problem, but they want you to take their side and cut ties with others. Beware of toxic partners who try to keep you isolated.

9. Your Mate Won’t Accept Blame

Making mistakes and having shortcomings are all part of the human condition. Unfortunately, couples in the best relationships still make mistakes every day. However, the saving grace is that they take responsibility for their words and actions and ask for your forgiveness.

A toxic mate may refuse to acknowledge fault and will shift the blame to you and everyone else. According to an article published by the American Psychological Review, blame-shifting is one of the many ominous signs of gaslighting.

10. You Ignore Your Needs

A healthy relationship fulfills a couple’s need for companionship, intimacy, and validation. If your relationship feels more one-sided, consider that you may be giving too much. Your mate should respect and love you enough to ensure your needs are paramount.

With this attitude, joy and fulfillment are mutual. However, be wary if your person shows signs of a narcissistic personality and is only concerned with their needs. They can’t love you and watch you ignore your needs in favor of them.

11. You Feel Lonely

One of the sweetest advantages of falling in love is that you can be with one another. Why bother if your person is emotionally unavailable and isn’t interested in fixing the situation? When they say they are there for you, they must be “there.”

You can sit on the couch next to your lover and still feel lonely. Do you share your thoughts, feelings, and dreams as a couple? Do they take time to have meaningful conversations with you?

12. You Are Bitter

It’s been said that bitterness is the only poison meant to hurt someone else, and it only destroys you. So how can you stay in a relationship if you or your partner harbors resentment? Whether it stems from your relationship or other people, it’s bound to create overwhelming toxicity.

Maybe your person is embittered and refuses to extend forgiveness to whomever. As a result, their dark feelings will seep into your relationship and soon make you feel angry and resentful. It’s a negative whirlpool that will hurt you in the end.

13. Controlling Behaviors

A significant other who loves you isn’t interested in controlling you. As an adult, you remain the person who makes your own decisions. A toxic mate often tries to control what you think, what you do, and where you go. A relationship shouldn’t be a virtual prison.

14. Waiting for a Change

If you stay in an unhealthy relationship hoping your mate will change, you’ll sadly be disappointed. While people can work on changing bad habits, many are already set in their ways. Wanting to change a toxic person isn’t a basis for a beautiful life together.

15. Are You in Their Future?

Listen closely when your partner discusses plans and dreams for the future. Are these “I” or “We” plans? If you aren’t part of their future, why are you part of their present?

16. You Feel Depressed

How do you feel when you are with your significant other? Do they bring out the best in you, or do you feel lost and trapped? These negative feelings may lead to depression.

Final Thoughts on Leaving a Toxic Partner

It’s difficult to walk away from a relationship in which you’ve invested time, energy, and heart. Leaving might be your best option if you’ve recognized these tell-tale signs of a toxic partner. You’re a worthy person, and you deserve better.

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