Weekly tips, affirmations, and small actions to feel your best.

11 Ways to Deescalate a Family Conflict

As long as there are families, there will be some sort of family conflict. These can occur between the parents, or it may be a sibling rivalry between the children. It’s normal and healthy for family members to share a difference of opinion if it’s done respectfully.

If someone says his family is drama-free, he is lying, or nobody in the family can honestly speak their mind. Unfortunately, most family conflicts arise regarding financial situations. Others fester over petty offenses that have long been forgotten.

11 Ways to Deescalate Family Conflict

Conflict has been the ruin of many family relationships.

Have you ever been a reluctant party to a family disagreement? How can you remain calm, stick to the facts, and work out an amicable solution? Here are 11 helpful ways to deescalate a family quarrel and keep your relationships intact.

1. Take a Break

deescalateWhen a disagreement within your family gets heated, you can often deescalate the situation by standing back for a moment. Remember that anger is the most comfortable emotion to show, and it usually masks insecurity and fear.

If you are caught in the middle of a family dispute, and the situation is reaching the boiling point, you should take a break, use deep breathing, and count to ten. This short pause may help you catch your breath and get a better view of the conflict.

If you feel that you need more time to gather your thoughts, it’s okay to walk away. When you have improved control over your emotions, you can think and reason better with others.

2. Stay Calm

It’s not easy to remain calm when everyone around you is yelling and blaming everyone else. When someone is belligerent, it’s human nature to mirror his emotions and snap right back. In these situations, your survival instinct kicks in.

Your body floods with stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisone, causing panic and anxiety, among other things. The best tactic to deescalate a family argument is to stay calm. When you speak in a standard, unthreatening tone, it sets the stage for everyone else.

Avoid telling others to calm down because it will probably be met with another stream of hurtful words.

3. Choose Your Battles

You must prioritize things so that you know what is most important in your life. Then, it’s less difficult to decide when it’s time to stand up and fight and when you should let something go.

Think back over your life and recall major squabbles within your family. Did the issues at hand prove crucial to everyone’s lives, or were they something trivial?

It can help deescalate a conflict if you ask yourself if this issue will mean anything next month or a year from now. Don’t risk losing a precious family bond over pettiness.

4. Turn Down the Volume

Why is it that when arguments escalate and tempers flare, everyone seems to have lost their hearing? Raising your voice is an innate human tactic to dominate others. When you think people aren’t listening and aren’t complying with your demands, yelling may be your go-to to force.

A loud voice isn’t going to sway others into your way of thinking. When you mix misplaced anger and raised voices, it creates an infernal whirlwind of hurtful words and potential violence.

To deescalate conflict in your family or with others, purposely lower your voice if you feel a flash of anger. It’s easier to understand each other’s points of view and resolve the issue when everybody isn’t screaming.

5. Listen, Listen, and Listen Again

One of the significant causes of misunderstandings and senseless arguments is that many people don’t listen to each other. Active listening requires you to be part of the conversation by using neutral body language, mirroring the speaker’s emotion, and restating what she’s said to gain clarification.

The golden rule of settling a dispute is for each party to be heard. Listen to what your friend or loved one has to say without interruption. Show mutual respect and listen to each other’s viewpoints. It’s the best way to resolve an argument.

pop meme6. Avoid Saying “Always,” or “Never.”

Many buzzwords should be avoided when deescalating a family feud. “Always” and “never” are indefinite qualifiers that usually make a statement more hostile. “You NEVER do your share, and you ALWAYS mess everything up.”

These statements aren’t helpful, and they do nothing but fan the flames of conflict. If you must address an issue with a friend or family member, “sometimes” can make him feel less defensive.

For example: “Sometimes when we don’t divide the work between us, I feel overworked and resentful.”

7. Express Your Feelings with “I.”

When you’re in an argument, the easiest way to put the other person in defensive mode is by starting your statements with the word “you.” Saying something like “You are just like your mother” can make matters worse.

To deescalate a family argument, be inclusive and make “we” statements. For example, “How can we do better planning for dinner when one of us is running late?” “Can we sit down together and go over the bills to create a more feasible budget?

These statements show that you are willing to work together for a solution, and you will avoid pointing the finger and blaming others.

8. Keep Past Grievances off the Table

Unless you have dementia or another brain condition, you can forgive, but you can never forget. Forgiving someone does not excuse the action. Rather, it puts the ball back into the offender’s court, and it gives you the freedom to go on with life. While the offense may still be written forever on your mind, it will never serve you well as a tool for control or revenge.

During a family conflict, try to stick to the facts at hand. You’ll only add fuel to the fire if you start dredging up issues from the past. It won’t help the situation and will only make you look bitter and vengeful.

9. Do Some Brainstorming

Frequently you can deescalate a family argument by giving everyone some breathing room. Take this time to brainstorm ways to resolve the conflict. You may need a couple of hours or days.

What’s important is that you don’t come together until the flaring emotions have somewhat cooled. Agree beforehand that everyone will get a chance to give his input without interruption. When everyone has calmed, it may be easier to see possible solutions that you couldn’t see because of the emotional storm.

Write ideas down on paper or a whiteboard so they appear clear to everyone present. Now, civilly discuss the ideas to come to a solution.

10. Be Able to Compromise

Is being right more important to you than your family relationships? Many family squabbles never get resolved because some people refuse to back down, apologize, or compromise.

You may come closer to a resolution if everyone involved feels like they’ve been heard, and their feelings have been validated. Of course, hearing and validation doesn’t mean they are right.

Listen to each other and find ways to compromise. If the conflict is over material goods or money, ask yourself if it’s worth your relationship. You can lay your head on your pillow at night when you have done the right thing, even if you had to compromise.

11. Bring in Professional Help

Some family disagreements are multi-faceted and involve generations of ill will and miscommunication. These problematic situations may not be the kind that can be resolved at the family dinner table. Before you see your precious family, bonds destroyed, deescalate the situation with professional help.

Family therapists are trained and experienced in family dynamics and familial disputes. Find a therapist you trust that makes you and your family feel comfortable. Your therapist isn’t there to take sides, but they can facilitate respectful conversation between opposing views.

Even if you can’t come to a resolution, you can still stay civil with each other.

deescalateFinal Thoughts on Knowing How to Deescalate Family Conflict

Whenever people are in a group, whether family, friends, or coworkers, there will be conflict. Arguments are a normal part of life. Since they are so common, you must learn effective strategies for resolving these issues without turning them into an all-out war.

If you find yourself in the middle of a torrential family dispute, try your best to stay calm and work together to find a solution. There is a reason that peacemakers are called blessed as it’s not an easy task. Count to ten, think about what you want to say and remember that you love the person.

10 Ways Your Romantic Partner Helps You Reach Your Goals

Lao Tzu said, “being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” Strength and courage are two qualities that everyone needs to achieve goals. Having a supportive romantic partner is one way to make sure you have plenty of both qualities.

You probably never thought about it, but your romantic partner could be one of the biggest reasons that you’re being so successful. They’re probably low-key assisting you in your efforts. In many cases, just being themselves is of immense help.

It’s okay for your partner to continue helping you in the background. However, you may want to recognize some of the ways your partner enables you to succeed, so you can say thank you. Here are ten ways your partner is probably helping you achieve your goals.

1. They inspire you to do better.

Your romantic partner can be one of the biggest inspirations in your life. Whether it’s because you imagine yourself taking care of them, you want to have a stable and luxurious future with them, or you aspire to be as successful as they are, something about having them in your life pushes you to do your best.

There is something about love – it can inspire the most amazing things in life. Love has inspired the world’s best music and art. It encourages you to be strong. Love gives you the strength to face challenges you never imagined you’d ever be able to meet. It’s the most perfect and genuine inspiration in the world.

2. They make you feel good about yourself.

romantic partnerEvery part of being in love feels good (if it doesn’t, you should exit the relationship immediately). Your romantic partner should make you feel good regularly, not just concerning your goals. When you have someone that makes you feel good, you’ll love yourself more and believe in yourself more.

A partner who makes you feel good about yourself helps you develop the self-confidence you need to tackle challenging goals. You’ll feel worthy of success, which will encourage you, even more, to go out and make things happen. You’ll shine like a star while you work your way to success.

3. They are a shoulder you can lean on when you’re down.

You’re human. As good as you feel about yourself, there will be times where something comes along and makes you feel bad. However, you don’t have to worry because your partner will be there to be the shoulder you can cry on.

Having a loving partner there when you’re feeling down allows you to express your frustrations to someone that you know genuinely cares about you. Even better is the fact that you’ll feel comfortable expressing your sorrows to them because you know they won’t minimize or dismiss your feelings.

Sometimes all you need is to vent, and your partner will listen, be patient, and be gentle. Once you’ve vented, they’ll make you feel good again, and you can get back to being the overachiever you are.

4. They’ll help you in your time of need.

Being successful doesn’t mean you have to do it alone. However, it can be hard to find people you trust to help you with your goals. Your partner is a person you should be able to trust with anything, and if they care about you, they’ll be willing to help you achieve your goals in any way possible.

They may take on tasks like cooking dinner, running errands, or cutting the grass. They may handle the kids more so you can focus (if you have kids). They won’t make you feel wrong about not being able to do it all yourself.

The best part is that you know your romantic partner doesn’t want anything from you. They’ll help you simply because they love you. It’s refreshing to have someone who genuinely wants to help you when you’re striving to achieve goals.

5. They don’t judge you.

Depending on your personality type, people’s judgment can hinder you or not affect you at all. If you’re the first type, it’s great that your partner won’t judge you. Your partner is probably the one person in the world you would feel genuinely open and safe with, and everyone needs at least one person in their life like that to stay sane.

Being in a judgment-free zone allows you to be as creative as you need to achieve your goals. You don’t have social restrictions, and you don’t have to worry about pleasing others or fitting it. Your romantic partner can provide this for you giving you the freedom to soar to new heights.

capricorn zodiac sign6. They help keep you balanced.

Sometimes when you’re working hard to achieve goals, you can forget about everything else around you. It can become the classic all work and no play situation. Your romantic partner can quickly break you out of that stressful routine.

Your partner understands that it’s crucial for you to reach your goals, but they also understand that your physical and mental health is essential. You need a break to take care of yourself and your needs. Your partner will remind you of that, preferably with a romantic date, and you’ll get the downtime you need to recharge.

7. They don’t mind taking a back seat to your goals sometimes.

While your partner knows when you need a break, they also know when it’s time to back off. Sometimes you may be on a roll, having a breakthrough, on the cusp of succeeding, or in a zone that you don’t want to break. Your partner will understand this and not make you feel guilty about diving into work.

Your partner will give you the space you need, and you won’t have to worry about them going anywhere. When you come down off the wave, they’ll be right there waiting for you with a smile and maybe even a romantic getaway.

8. They help keep you motivated.

Romantic partners can be a great motivator. This is similar to them being an inspiration to you, but this one is more rooted in action than ideology. You may think about how much you love your partner, how much you want to show that love, how you want to take care of them – you get the picture. You know that achieving your goals will allow you to do all those things, so you achieve your goals out of love.

They may even purposefully motivate you because they know what you’re made of. Sometimes your partner can see things in you that you can’t see in yourself. Every now and then, it may take an outside influence to help you reach your potential. It’s a bonus when that outside influence is someone you love.

9. They can keep you organized and help to delegate work.

Achieving goals can take a village! There is so much to do, and you are one person. You may have to give all your attention to critical situations, so your partner supports you by handling all the smaller stuff goal-related stuff, so you don’t have to.

They may even be your assistant for a little while, taking some of the work off you so you can focus on the priorities. Similar to how they’ll help outside of your goals, they can do the same inside of your goals. Some partners may even be an actual partner in your goals, so you’re sharing the work and the success. After all, no one ever said success had to be lonely.

It can be such a relief when you don’t have to do everything by yourself. Knowing that you have someone to pick up the slack gives you the freedom to focus on winning. You won’t be stressed and worrying about little things that don’t align with what you’re trying to achieve.

10. They help you celebrate your success.

This may be the best way your romantic partner helps you achieve goals. When you know you have rewards waiting on you, you’ll be inspired to work that much harder to achieve the goals you’ve set for yourself. After all, everyone loves recognition.

Your partner knows what recognition would motivate you the most. In fact, they probably know you better than anyone else does. This lets you know that however they decide to celebrate your success, it will be worth it.

romantic partnerFinal Thoughts on How Your Romantic Partner Helps You Achieve Goals

Recognizing all the ways that your partner helps you achieve goals does not take any credit away from the work that you’re putting in. Most of your success is due to your actions. However, it doesn’t hurt to have someone who truly cares about you to help you a little along the way.

You are lucky to have a partner that is so supportive. Believe it or not, it can be not easy these days to find someone who will be in your corner unconditionally. If you’re lucky enough to have that person, be thankful, say thank you, and let them know how much you appreciate them.

UC Davis Researchers Find New Threat to World’s Wild Bee Population

The wild bee population has been in trouble for a long time. Researchers have been looking for causes and solutions for decades and have come across several factors that could be contributing to their possible extinction. Like humans, bees face several problems that can contribute to bad health and, ultimately, death.

In the last few years, researchers have come across new threats to the insects. The study was conducted by researchers from the University of California, Davis, and was published in the Proceedings of the Royal Society B Journal. Dr. Mia Park, currently a Postdoctoral Fellow in the Biological Sciences Department at North Dakota State University, Fargo, led the team.

Other researchers included:

  • Clara Stuligross, a Ph.D. candidate in ecology at UC Davis (lead author)
  • Professor E.J. Blitzer of Carroll College
  • Jason Gibbs, Entomologist
  • John E. Losey, Professor of Entomology at Cornell University
  • Bryan Danforth, Professor of Entomology at Cornell University

The study was conducted over the course of a couple of years. It was a very thorough study that involved a lot of data and analyzing. The results were completely verifiable and have shed light on what needs to happen to help the bee population. Please keep reading to find out the details of the study and the ultimate conclusion that was drawn from it.

Study Finds New Threats to the Wild Bee Population

wild beesAfter conducting the study, the researchers found that pesticides and a lack of flowering plants contribute to a waning bee population. Out of these two threats, pesticides were the biggest. It reduced bee reproduction 1.75 times more than the scarcity of their food source. Pesticides were responsible for devastating diseases that ravaged many bee species, especially in the United States.

The sample of bees used in the study came from 19 orchards. The sample included 1820 honey bees and 3200 wild bees, collectively including 71 species of bees. There were plenty of controls so that results would be as accurate as possible.

They ensured the orchards were a larger distance than the bees’ typical foraging distance so there wouldn’t be overlap in observations. Then they observed the activity during the same time frame each day during the same temperature range. They also used pesticide spray records for the entire season from all participating orchards.

The results showed that pesticide use decreased the population of wild bees. However, the decrease was more significant in solitary bees than social bees. It was also observed that orchards with less surrounding natural landscape resulted in a more significant decrease than the others.

The study clearly shows that pesticides are killing bees. However, the significance of the size of natural landscape is slightly more complex. According to the researchers, having a smaller surrounding natural landscape equates to less natural pest control. This causes farmers to rely more heavily on pesticides which increases the mortality of the bees.

This study clearly identified these threats to bees, but the solution is going to take a lot more effort. However, it’s a solution that is essential to the survival of wild bees as well as humans. Keep reading to find out how wild bees contribute to human life.

The Importance of a Healthy Wild Bee Population

You may think that the most important thing bees do for humans is to make honey, but you would be wrong. Bees are pollinators. Without them, a lot of plants cannot reproduce. They are an integral part of the ecosystem, and without them, the ecosystem will undergo a profound change, not for the better.

How Bees Pollinate Plants

According to the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA), approximately 250,000 species of flowering plants depend on bees to spread their pollen. Bees enter these plants to feed on the pollen and end up brushing against the anther. This is essentially the male reproductive part of the plant.

They then fly to another plant and brush up against the stigma, which is the plant’s female reproductive part. The pollen is then transferred from the anther to the stigma. In order for pollination to occur, it must be transferred to the same plant species (which is not a problem since bees land on many plants).

Unfortunately, bees get covered with pesticides just like they get covered with pollen.

breast cancer

Read about how honeybee venom is a breakthrough in breast cancer research.

The Benefits That Come from Bees

Bees are essential to the commercial production of over 90 essential crops that put dinner on the table. Honey bees are the most important bees to these crops. The extinction or even the reduction of bees could launch a food shortage on a global scale.

You must also consider that the plants that bees pollinate provide food for other animals as well. Without bees, humans won’t be the only animals that starve.

Besides food, bees are the source of many other products that people use regularly. Some of these products include:

  • Beeswax
  • Royal Jelly
  • Propolis
  • Bee Pollen

Other Threats that Bees Face

As stated before, bees were already in danger before researchers discovered the negative effects of pesticides. The danger is so significant that there are groups dedicated to saving bees popping up all over the world. Their efforts to shed light on the situation have been going slowly, but successfully because now the bee problem is garnering more attention than ever.

The decline in the honey bee population first became noticeable in the United States in 2007. It was so noticeable that many major news outlets were reporting on the mysterious case of the missing bees. Many beekeepers suffered dramatic business losses as bees seemed to abandon their hives. There seemed to be no explanation for the disappearances.

Finally, it was discovered that a rare bee disease called colony collapse disorder (CCD) was a major part of the problem. The disease was spread to the U.S. from Australia several years ago, leading to almost 45 percent of bees in commercial bee hives in the country to be missing. On top of that, it was discovered that hives that were affected with CCD were also affected by a bee virus known as the Israeli acute paralysis virus (IAPV). This virus is lethal to bees.

It took a lot of time, but as research into this matter continued over the years, scientists discovered that although IAPV was present in all the devastated bee colonies, it wasn’t the primary cause of CCD. Instead, CCD occurred due to several factors that affected the bees. These factors eventually became too much for the colony leading to something like a bee genocide.

Ironically, one of those factors was pesticides.

What Can Be Done to Protect the Wild Bee population?

Protecting bees is a task that is going to require more than government agencies and bee enthusiast groups. It’s going to require a mass effort including as many citizens as possible. Bees are in trouble and humans have to be the ones to fix it.

Helping bees starts in your own yard. You can create habitats in your yard that are friendly for bees. Don’t be afraid to do this.

Many people have a fear of being stung by bees. However, bees have no interest in stinging humans because they’ll die when they do so. They’ll only sting you if you are a threat to their colony or if you antagonize then while they’re out searching for food.

You can make a garden of local, low-maintenance plants in your yard and add nesting places for bees. Bees like downed wood, stems, or even sheds. Of course, you don’t want them in a shed you use so consider building some little decorative “mini-shed” near your garden. Some bees like to nest in the ground. They’ll appreciate loose soil that’s been recently turned.

Above all, ease up on the pesticides! If you must use pesticides, opt for natural, organic pesticides that don’t have harmful chemicals. You could also go for natural pesticides – pests that keep away harmful pests.

wild beeFinal Thoughts on the Imminent Threats to the Wild Bee Population

If you’ve read this article, you obviously have some interest in bees, even if it’s only a passing interest. However, don’t shrug this information off. Bees need your help, and the recent research proves it.

Don’t dismiss bees as some buzzy insect that you’d rather not be around. Bees are important to the balance of the ecosystem. Without them, humans will suffer serious consequences, especially in the global food supply.

Pesticides are one of the biggest problems that bees face. It’s up to humans to do their part to eliminate harmful chemicals on the plants that bees eat. Please do your part by buying organic foods, and hopefully, with time, pesticides will be a thing of the past, and the great pollinators can thrive in their natural habitats again.

Is Yawning Contagious? Scientists Explain Why We Do It

Yawning has been observed and researched for many years, but there is still much to figure out. It has remained a mystery all along, but there are some theories about it. Scientists believe they are beginning to figure out why humans yawn and if it is contagious.

The definition and the mechanics of it are well known, of course. It is a natural bodily reflex that includes taking a deep breath in, opening your jaw wide, and quickly and forcefully exhaling. Yawning causes a feeling of relaxation, stretching of the eardrums, and eyes to close tightly.

One theory of why people yawn is that they need oxygen, bringing more oxygen into your body. This theory isn’t well-supported, however, and many researchers believe it isn’t true. It seems to have more to do with brain temperature, empathy, and other factors.

Scientists Explain Why We Yawn

While all of this is still being researched, scientists have discovered some reasons why people yawn. They have also done work to figure out if the reflex is contagious, as it is widely believed to be.

1 – It Cools Your Brain

yawningThermal images show that yawning might help to cool the human brain. When you inhale deeply during a yawn, it pulls cool air into your mouth and body. This then cools the blood that goes to the brain.

This theory could explain when you yawn more when you have a fever. If your brain is hot and this reflex cools it down, it’s only expected that you yawn more at this time.

This seems to occur anytime the brain is too hot, not only when there is a fever present. It removes hot blood from around the brain and replaces it with cool blood.

Another thing to consider is how often you yawn in the winter compared to the summer. In the winter, most people yawn quite a bit less than they do in the summer. This further supports the theory that it happens when your brain needs cooled.

2 – You Feel Stressed

High levels of cortisol can trigger a yawn, and cortisol levels increase when you are stressed. So, if you are feeling stressed, you’ll notice that you yawn more often.

3 – To Change Your State of Awareness

Your body has to function in different ways at different times of the day. Sometimes when you yawn, it is a way for your body to change its state. Then, your body will be able to function accordingly.

When you yawn at night time or before bed, it is your body’s way of preparing for rest. If you yawn when you are bored, it’s a sign that your body is shifting to a lower level of alertness. Likewise, if you yawn after exercising, it’s because your body is changing from high energy to low energy.

4 – Communication

Humans communicate with one another in physical ways that they don’t even realize. One way this is done is through a yawn. It is believed to be an unspoken way of indicating boredom or a need for sleep. Research suggests that this might be the most “contagious” yawn of all.

5 – To Make Up for Elevation Changes

When you are on an airplane or driving up a mountain, this natural reflex is a way to equalize ear pressure. You will likely do it involuntarily and continue to do it on purpose when you realize it works.

6 – To Show Empathy

If you have social empathy, you will likely yawn at the same time as other people. This happens when you are reading about it or talking about it, as well. Even the mention of a yawn can trigger the reflex.

While this could be true for everyone, those who are more empathetic will be more likely to yawn when someone else does. It is also believed that the closer you are to someone emotionally, the more likely you are to yawn when they do.

7 – To Keep You Alert

Many people believe that a yawn is an indication of sleepiness, but this is not entirely accurate. Instead, it is believed that a yawn is a way to keep you alert. Since you likely aren’t very alert when you are exhausted, this is probably why it continually happens when you are tired.

When you yawn, your heart rate increases, which is why it can make you more alert. It only works for a short time, so you’ll notice it frequently happens during these times. This is also why you tend to fidget and stretch during this because those are other ways to increase alertness.

When you yawn just after waking up, it helps you become alert and ready for the day. It will stretch the lungs and tissues and help the body flex the muscles before starting to move. Plus, it forces the blood toward your head, which is sure to make you more alert.

Another way this natural reflex helps keep you alert is by keeping you more in-tune with your surroundings. When you yawn, muscles in your ears are stimulated, which leads to greater hearing sensitivity. You will be able to hear things you wouldn’t have otherwise heard.

Plus, the activation of those muscles will increase your range of movement. Plus, you will squeeze your eyes shut and open them back up during a yawn, making your eyesight clearer.

So, Is Yawning Contagious?

empathNow that you know what the scientists say about why you yawn, it’s time to learn if it is contagious. You have probably yawned when you saw someone else yawn, and this likely even occurs often. Plus, you may have yawned while reading this since even the thought of a yawn can trigger one.

As you have probably already guessed, the answer is yes. Yawning is contagious, but only for some people and during certain times.

Empathetic people are generally the only ones who yawn when someone else does. The situation has to allow for it, as well. If someone is angry or feeling other negative emotions, they may not be as empathetic as they normally would be.

Another factor that contributes to this is how close you are to someone emotionally. You will be more likely to “catch” a contagious yawn from someone you are close to rather than a stranger.

If you still aren’t convinced that a yawn is contagious, try watching a video of people yawning. Chances are, if you are empathetic, it’ll make you yawn at least once. Then, pay attention to when the people you are close to yawn and see if you yawn, as well.

What to Do if You are Yawning too Much

If you think that you yawn too much, you should pay attention to that. While it may be nothing, there are medical reasons for excessive yawning. These reasons include:

  • sleep apnea
  • narcolepsy
  • side effects of medications
  • heart failure or bleeding around the heart
  • a brain tumor (although this is uncommon)
  • epilepsy
  • liver failure
  • multiple sclerosis

Before you panic, however, you should think about your lifestyle. If any aspects of your life could be causing the excess, you should try changing those first. Normally, it’s a common and easy fix, but if the following ideas don’t take care of it, you should see your doctor.

How to Stop Yawning So Much

1 – Practice Deep Breathing Techniques

In a way, this goes back to the idea that a need for oxygen causes a yawn. While that idea has been debunked, it is still commonly believed to be linked to it. Even though oxygen doesn’t seem to play a role, deep breathing still helps.

One study even published results that showed nasal breathing helps decrease how often and frequently you yawn. Many people suggest breathing deeply through your nose when you notice you have been yawning excessively.

2 – Get More Sleep

If you have to yawn to continually stay alert during the day, you probably need to sleep more. It’s easier to be alert when you have had enough rest. Your body won’t need to do this natural reflex to get you to be more alert if you already are.

Try to limit caffeine in the hours before bed, and avoiding alcohol may help, too. You can also set a sleep schedule for yourself, but you have to stick to it to be effective. Getting more exercise and having a comfortable place to sleep will help, too.

3 – Take a Break

If you notice you’re yawning too much, take a break and move around. It will stimulate your brain and help you become focused and alert again.

4 – Cool Down

You will yawn less if you aren’t hot, so make sure to stay cool whenever you can. Drink water or other healthy cold beverages when you are outside on a hot day. Plus, try to keep your indoor environment cool.

yawningFinal Thoughts on the Things That Trigger Yawning

Yawning is a natural bodily reflex, but most of the details remain unknown. While scientists and researchers have been working on it for many years, there is still much to learn.

Even so, the information that scientists have given is pretty incredible. They are beginning to understand why we yawn, and it’s been confirmed that it is contagious. With these facts, there will be many more studies to follow in the future.

7 Traits of A Narcissist That Prove They Are (Almost) Impossible to Love

Do you know someone that is self-centered and shifts the blame whenever they’re caught in any wrongdoing? The traits of a narcissist are hard to deny, especially when you’ve been around these kinds of people all your life. However, what if you don’t know about these natural-born manipulators?

Is there a way to protect yourself from people who think they do no wrong, and all the blame always lies on your doorstep? Dating is hard enough in today’s society if both parties try their hardest to make things work.

Sadly, things can become really complicated when you add personality disorders and other annoying traits to the mix. A person that suffers from a narcissistic personality has a heightened view of themselves. They don’t show empathy for others as it’s beneath them to care about others more than they care about their needs.

These people will walk on you, damage your pride, and even hurt you deeply to avoid being in trouble. They will blame you for things you didn’t do, and they can turn their wrongdoings around and make it your problem.

It’s tough to please this type of person. While everyone has some toxic traits that they must deal with, living or dating someone with narcissistic characteristics can be psychologically damaging. You may begin to question your sanity as well as your relationship.

Seven Traits a Narcissist Often Exhibits

Sadly, some of the psychological damage that is caused by a manipulator never goes away. It’s tough to date or be in a long-term relationship with this person. Before you get into a mess you can’t get out of, here are seven traits of a narcissist that you should be aware of.

1. They Love to Play Head Games with You

traits of a narcissistHave you ever heard of the term gaslighting? It’s a relatively new word used to describe someone who uses a situation to make someone doubt their sanity. It’s a classic game that narcissists use that shifts the blame from them to the other person.

For instance, let’s assume that you are suspicious that your lover is having an affair behind your back. You confront him or her and want answers to the evidence that you’ve found. Instead of them admitting or denying it, they turn it around and make it about you.

They can either claim that you’re the one having an affair or that you’re experiencing mental decline and need professional help. These master manipulators have the innate ability to turn the focus off of them by creating drama. The result is you doubting what you saw and thinking perhaps you need to see a doctor.

2. Their Personality Does a 180 Degree Turn

When you met your partner, they probably were attentive and full of nothing but love and admiration for you. However, they can only keep up this ruse for so long. Eventually, their true colors will come shining through.

This behavior is so typical that psychologists call it grooming. They use their wit and charm to groom you, and then they sink their claws into you like a prized possession. Once they have you where they want you, they will start the never-ending cycle of lies.

They commonly use tactics of idealization and devaluation to break you down. When you see the traits of a narcissist in your partner, then you need to run the other way.

3. They Degrade Everything You Do

Since a narcissist has such a lofty opinion of themselves, they will see everything you do as inferior to their methods. For instance, you don’t mop the floors good enough, or the steak wasn’t cooked to perfection. They look down on you, and it starts to weigh on your psyche.

They see you as a person that can’t get anything right, and it’s hard to live and be in a relationship with someone who has such a low opinion of you. If you feel that you must walk on eggshells and tiptoe around them so that you don’t get attacked with verbal abuse, it’s not a healthy relationship.

4. Your Opinion Doesn’t Matter to Them

Remember, no one is as gifted and unique as they are, so that they won’t view your opinions as valuable. It’s not bad enough that they think you can’t do anything right, but what you have to say isn’t necessary either. One of the traits of a narcissist is that they think they know it all.

They may not consult you on major purchases like a car, house, or investments. They feel that they know what they’re doing, and they don’t think that you can add anything to the situation. If you’re in a long-term relationship with this person, it can be hard to have open communication when what you say has no importance to them.

Your opinions and views are essential to everyone who truly loves you. It’s almost impossible to love a narcissist because their master manipulative ways are so damaging.

narcissist

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5. They’re a Ticking Time Bomb

One thing that is hard to deal with in a narcissist is that they can go from 0-100 in about two seconds. They seem like a bomb that is ready to explode with the slightest jostling. This person’s mood will reach scary heights before you can even realize what has happened.

They may resort to physical violence as well as emotional abuse that you don’t have to take. This self-centered individual will never love you as much as they love themselves, so how can you have a relationship with them?

6. They Have Zero Compassion or Empathy for Others

Let’s assume that one of your parents passed. Rather than being there as a shoulder to cry on during the viewing and funeral, they act like it’s just another day. They go about with their life like they don’t have a care in the world.

The sad thing is that your heart is broken, and you’ve lost a monumental person in your life, but they can’t see past their needs to attend to yours. When confronted about the need for support during this difficult time, they may say things to you like, “Well, they were sick, and you knew they were going to die anyway.”

Don’t expect any support from them as they are incapable of giving anything of the sort. They may shy away from any emotional issues as it can uncover problems they have within themselves. There is no reason to be cruel when life hands you blow, but if you need support, then you should move away from this manipulator.

7. They Crave Control

This person loves to be in control of the situation. When dealing with this personality, part of the disorder is that their low self-esteem needs a boost. They get this boost by being in control. If they feel that they can run the situation, then they can feel at ease.

For instance, it’s the mother-in-law who steps in and tries to help plan the wedding of her daughter to be. The only problem is that she is taking over the entire event and making decisions that are not hers. The bride doesn’t want to cause a stir, so she goes along to keep the peace.

The only issue here is that this person is using her insecurities to manipulate the show. She has no right to take the decisions away from the bride, but she will do what she is allowed as if there are no boundaries.

traits of a narcissistFinal Thoughts on Recognizing the Seven Traits of a Narcissist

There are many personality types in this world as it would be a boring place if everyone were the same. Being in a relationship should be fun, adventurous, and make you feel warm and fuzzy at night. You want to be with someone who makes you feel like a better person and is not continually tearing you down every chance they get.

It’s often challenging to spot traits of a narcissist initially as they come off as the person with much charm and wit. Sadly, they can only keep up with this ruse for so long before their true nature comes shining through. Ask yourself these questions when having doubts about your relationship:

•Does my opinion matter?

•Does my partner pick me up or tear me down?

•Do they sympathize with me when I am sad or have had a bad day?

•Do they love the way I cook, clean the house, or dress?

•Are they the person that I can see spending the rest of my life with?

•Is our relationship a haven for me when the world is cruel?

•Am I at ease and peaceful when I am with them?

If you can’t answer these questions with “yes,” you need to look for someone who can fill your emotional and physical needs. This person cannot give you the kind of relationship and love that you crave and deserve.

They have a personality disorder that makes it hard to live with them and almost impossible to love. If you see any of the traits of a narcissist in your current relationship, you need to evaluate it seriously.

Dogs Heart Rates Jump When You Say I Love You, Backed by Science

Many dog owners frequently tell their pet that they love them, and science shows that they aren’t crazy for doing so. In fact, a dog’s heart rate jumps when you say ‘I love you’ to them. Even if your dog can’t use words, they’ll respond lovingly, showing that they do understand.

It is no longer a guessing game as to what happens to a dog when they are shown loving attention. A behavioral expert on dogs concluded that a dog’s heart rate increased by 46.2% when they heard the words ‘I love you’. Similarly, dogs experience the same effect in reaction to most other kinds of love, as well.

What love means to a dog is still up in the air, however. There is no way of knowing if a dog’s version of love is the same as ours, but it is pure bliss either way. It is still a nice feeling knowing that you are the reason for your pet’s excitement and happiness.

Dogs have a wide range of emotions, and there is finally scientific evidence to back up some of the theories. Knowing that dogs’ heart rate jump when hearing ‘I love you’ is one step in the right direction. To better understand and learn some signs that your dog’s heart rate has increased, it’s important to know what the researchers determined.

Researchers Explain How and Why Dogs Heart Rate Jump

dogs heart rateIn a study published by the National Library of Medicine, researchers focused on dogs’ emotional state and how it affects heart rate. The researchers determined that a dog’s heart rate would increase during moments of excitement. This included when they saw their owners and when their owners gave love to their pets.

Using heart rate variability (also known as HRV), researchers compared dogs when they weren’t being social and when they were. Through their research, they determined that this is a valuable way to determine the emotional response of a pet dog. When the heart rate increased, the dog was feeling excited, which is what occurs when a dog is given love.

While that study confirms the emotional response of dogs, another study further explains why this occurs. When a dog is shown love, such as being told “I love you” by their owner, it causes an increase in oxytocin levels. Oxytocin is known to make people and animals feel happier and experience a sense of well-being.

Oxytocin is released when there is a feeling of love, comfort, or socialization. When a dog feels loved, it will have a higher level of oxytocin present, resulting in wanting to spend even more time near you. Continuing the cycle, they’ll become excited anytime you love on them and give them special attention.

The Thing That Doesn’t Make Their Heart Rates Jump

Now that you know why and how their heart rates jump when you say “I love you”, you may be wondering what has the opposite effect. Instead of making a dog excited like saying “I love you” does, cuddling can help lower the heart rate. It helps calm the pet and lowers its pulse, allowing both of you to bask in the comforting cuddles.

How You Can Tell When Your Dog Is Excited and Feeling Love

Contrary to popular belief, wagging their tail isn’t the only way a dog will show that they are excited. Many signs indicate your dog has an increased heart rate resulting from excitement and love. Some of them are extremely surprising, while others you may already know.

1 – They Chew Your Stuff

While you may think your pet is being naughty when they chew your slippers or tennis shoes, this isn’t the case. They aren’t trying to be bad, instead, they are just trying to show how much they love you.

Since your scent is on your item, a dog will feel closer to you if they are near it or on it. Then, to release endorphin and relax, dogs will chew on things. Before you realize it, they’ll be chewing on your slipper trying to relax while picking up your scent.

Keep in mind that this is only the case if your dog is chewing things while you are away from the home. This means that they are missing you. If they are doing it while you are home, however, it could be a sign that they desire more attention.

2 – They Come to You When They are Hurt

When a pet comes to you when they are hurt, it’s a sign of affection and comfort. You may notice they hold their paw out to you when they have hurt it. Or, you may experience a dog laying its head on your lap when they aren’t feeling great.

If a dog wasn’t excited or feeling a sense of love from you, they wouldn’t behave in this way. They would go somewhere alone when they are in pain. So, if your dog comes to you during moments of distress, you should be flattered.

dogs3 – They Give You Licks and Kisses

This is a sure sign that a dog is excited to see you. They love to kiss and lick their owner, and this is one of the best ways they can.

If you wonder how much you are missed, just think about how many kisses you get from your pet when you return. There will be no doubt in your mind that you are their person if you get endless licks and kisses.

4 – They Greet Your Excitedly

Here is where the tail wagging comes into play. When a dog is excited to be near you, they will immediately begin wagging their tail. Plus, they’ll jump around and wiggle all over the place to show their delight.

5 – They Beg

Believe it or not, dogs don’t beg just to be pests. If your pet is begging by pawing at you and giving little barks while you’re holding something, it’s a sign of love. Give them some attention and affection and you may be able to ease some of the begging behaviors.

6 – They Bring You Things

If your dog randomly brings you their toy or a treasure from outside, it’s a gift. Dogs won’t share with those they don’t love and trust, so if your pet does this, it’s a good sign.

7 – They Lie with Their Belly Up

There is no position more vulnerable for dogs than lying with their belly facing up. If your dog will do this with you around, they truly trust you. They know that if you touch their belly, it’ll be for love and not to do them harm.

8 – They are Loyal

Dogs are known to be loyal, so it’s no surprise that when they are loyal, they are feeling love. This is shown in a few ways, including barking at strangers near your home or on your porch. They want to protect you and keep you safe, and this is the way that they know how to do so.

Do Human Hearts React the Same Way to Dogs?

You’re likely wondering if this works both ways. Since dogs are known to cheer their owners up, it’s a good indicator that human heart rates jump when in the presence of their pets. The same studies mentioned before show that a human heart rate increases by around 10% when they see their dog.

Humans must truly treasure their pets because their love goes beyond that 10% heart rate increase. Many people have even said they cancel plans with other people to spend time with their dogs. Now if that is not love, I don’t know what is.

Benefits of Having a Pet

Now that you know the effects dogs have on you, you can enjoy the thought that pets are good for you. It goes beyond an increase in heart rate for you, however, and a desire to spend time with your pet. Pet owners also experience the following benefits:

  • a decrease in blood pressure
  • lowered cholesterol levels
  • decreased triglyceride levels
  • fewer feelings of loneliness
  • more exercise and outdoor activity
  • increased socialization
  • offers social support to kids
  • improved behavior for children who own a dog
  • a greater sense of empathy
  • decreased anxiety and stress levels

dogs heart rateFinal Thoughts on Dogs Heart Rates Jump When You Say I Love You, Backed by Science

While you already know that your dog loves you, it is nice to have that thought backed by science. With science proving that dogs’ heart rate jumps, it’s all the more reason to tell them more often. Plus, it will be beneficial to you, as well.

Remember all of the signs that your dog is excited, feeling love, or missing you. When they do things that seem naughty at first, it may just be their way of easing those intense feelings. Oftentimes, these types of behaviors are signs of love from a dog.

Dogs will love you unconditionally and be undeniably loyal to their owner. Remember the effect that showing them love has and continue to let them know they are loved and cared for. The next time someone tells you that you’re crazy for talking to dogs, share these facts and studies with them.

10 Reasons to Open Up Carefully When You Meet Someone

Do you open up carefully, or do you meet someone and divulge everything from the time you were born? Wouldn’t it be nice if you could trust the motives of every person you met? In a perfect world, you could meet a new friend, tell them all your darkest secrets, and know that they would be there through thick and thin.

Sadly, many people pay a considerable price when they’re too trusting of others. You may be lured in by good looks, a charming smile, or someone that is gifted in charisma. Some individuals are more trouble than their worth, and there’s no way to know that when you first meet.

While you may have all the right motives, some people only use others because they want something in return. Have you ever heard of someone “sleeping their way to the top?” Using sex appeal and hormones’ power, people will stoop to the lowest level to get what they want.

Thankfully, there are people in this world that will be a true friend. They will stand beside you no matter what life throws your way. It’s hard not to be pessimistic when you meet someone new, but you must protect yourself.

Ten Reasons Why You Should Open Up Carefully When Meeting New People

If you tend to divulge too much too quickly when meeting someone, you need to be careful. Here are ten reasons why you need to open up carefully when entering new relationships.

1. You Don’t Want Everyone Knowing Your Secrets

open up carefullyLet’s assume that you met a lovely lady and shared a night of drinks and laughter. During this period, you felt so comfortable that you started telling her about all the pains of your past. You’ve placed yourself in a very vulnerable position by exposing yourself heart to her.

She can take that information and file it in the back of her mind for future reference or use it to get ahead in life. What if this woman was trying to push you out of your position at the office? Any dirt you give here could be used against you.

Though life doesn’t function like a court of law, keep in mind that anything you say can and will be used against you. When you keep that mindset, then you will monitor what you say. Never tell anyone anything that you are afraid they will repeat. No wonder it’s said that gossip can be as cruel as the grave.

2. Some People Don’t Have Good Motives

While some people may want to be your friends, not everyone has your best interests at heart. What if a person you just met and seems pretty chummy wants to get information for your ex to use against you in court?

If you have any other conflicts going on in life, like a pending child custody case, open up carefully to anyone new. What if this person is a paid agent for the other party? Sadly, you shouldn’t have to think this way in life, but people will use you for revenge.

3. You Could Be Used

Have you ever heard people with money say that they want people to like them, not what they can do for them? Maybe you have money, or you hold a prestigious position. Anyone new in your life might not be there for the right reasons.

You must open up carefully when it’s someone that knows you have authority or clout, and they want to use that to their advantage. They can use words as sweet as honey and pretend to be your best friend. The sad fact is that they are only in the relationship to see what they can get.

4. You Put Yourself in a Vulnerable Position

No one likes to be vulnerable and exposed. Even if a friendship starts on the right foot, what if things go sour later on? Anything you’ve said can be used against you.

What if you told your girlfriend that you once tried a serious drug while in college? You never became hooked on the drug, and you didn’t even like how it made you feel. However, they put their spin on it, and the story becomes worse.

It could go around your place of employment, house of faith, or group of friends, that you have a drug problem. When you tell secrets, they are open to interpretation. Your view of things may not be how someone else views it, and it can end in disaster.

5. A Bad Friend Can Destroy Your Life

Have you ever seen the movie Single White Female starring Bridget Fonda? The psychological thriller has a terrifying premise. The main character in the film has everything going for her in life. She has the perfect boyfriend, a great apartment, and a fantastic career. When her boyfriend cheats on her, she is forced to get a roommate to share expenses. The roommate she picks has a horrible past and has murdered in another state.

She seems like the perfect friend, but in the end, the main character nearly loses her life. While this is a movie and you must suspend reality, the premise is scary enough to consider. The woman was running from her past, and before it all came to an end, she wanted to take over the life of the main character.

Keep in mind that not everyone has your best interests at heart. While murder is a bit extreme, you have to keep your guard up in today’s society.

trust6. Self-Disclosing Can Push Others Away

What if you have a past that isn’t the best? Nobody is perfect. You could have a divorce, affairs, past drug abuse, bankruptcy, and all sorts of things that you’ve dealt with in life. What could happen if you don’t open up carefully?

Could you scare others away? What would happen to a new friend if they found out your deepest darkest secrets? Would they still want to be friends with you?

No law says you have to open up about your life. You can choose what you divulge to your friends, and some secrets should remain buried.

7. It Takes Time to Build Trust

It takes months or even years to build the kind of relationships that last a lifetime. Don’t be so eager to dive right into a friendship. Whether you’re dating someone new or have a new BFF to hang out with, be careful and allow yourself time to build trust.

8. If You’ve Been Burnt Before, Don’t Rebound Quickly

Have you been hurt in previous relationships? Why do people break up with a boyfriend or girlfriend only to marry six months later? Rebound relationships seldom work.

Your heart and your emotions are all over the place when you’ve lost someone near and dear to you. Since your emotionally vulnerable, it only stands to reason that you are looking to latch onto someone else. When it comes to matters of the heart, don’t rebound too quickly, or it can cause significant problems.

9. You Need an Aura of Mystery About You

Keep a little mystery about yourself when meeting someone new. Don’t start telling them about your parents, siblings, a dog you had growing up, and all your failed love interests. Instead, let some things be left to the imagination.

If you want to make sure that people don’t use you, you must open up carefully. Keep things surface until you’ve had enough time to feel comfortable talking about your life. Some people naturally want to tell you anything and everything about themselves, but no law says you have to do the same.

10. Somethings Should Stay Private

Why is it so hard for some people to realize that some things need to stay private? One of the reasons you open up carefully is that no one needs to know your business. If it’s a romantic relationship, you don’t want to ruminate about everything that went wrong in previous relationships.

If it’s a friendship, then you should be very selective about what you tell them. Intimate details and horrific experiences that don’t add anything to your relationship should be avoided topics. Instead, if you need to discuss past hurts that have harmed you, talk to a therapist.

open up carefullyFinal Thoughts on Opening Up Carefully to New People in Your Life

Sadly, you must be careful when meeting new people. Not everyone in your universe is the perfect friend and there to support you. Some individuals will come along your path to use and abuse you for their gain. You don’t have the time or energy for the drama.

When meeting someone new, go very slow in the relationship. Don’t be eager to tell all your secrets and never tell them anything they can use against you. How long should you wait before you start being more intimate in conversation?

Some experts say a year is a reasonable time frame to see if your friendship will last the test of time. If you feel that your relationship is fizzling out or stale, you’ll be glad you didn’t tell them too much. However, if you still feel love and admiration for this person at the one-year mark, you should start opening up carefully to them.

A good friendship is great for your mental health and can be what gets you through life. You need friends to surround you as a support system, so you need to make sure it’s the right ones.

Science Explains What Happens to Your Body if You Use Too Much Essential Oil

Essential oils have become common in homes, on jewelry, and for skin application. With the different scents, all-natural ingredients, and plentiful benefits, there is a good reason they are popular. While they are all-natural and beneficial, there is still such thing as too much essential oil.

Since they are so commonly used and sold in many stores, you may not think they can be unsafe. Using too much of them poses many health risks, however, despite the easy access. They are highly concentrated and should be treated as you would treat medication.

The consequences of using too much essential oil can be life-threatening in extreme cases. Even in minor cases of overexposure to essential oil, you can still be left uncomfortable and in pain.

When used correctly and safely, however, they are highly beneficial. They can be used for depression, anxiety, eczema, insomnia, hair growth, and many other conditions. It is important to know the risks involved, however, to know what to be careful of.

What Happens If You Use Too Much Essential Oil

Scientists have done intensive research on essential oils to determine how they affect the body. It has been determined that, in many cases, when using too much essential oil, the body is negatively impacted. Many of the plants the oil is extracted from are highly toxic, and their oil is highly concentrated.

It is important to understand what can happen if you use too much essential oil. This way, you can plan and use precaution in the future. These things all vary in severity but should all be taken seriously.

too much essential oil1 – Overdosing on Too Much Essential Oil

It may sound crazy that you can overdose on something all-natural, but it is possible. Since the oils are so highly concentrated, being exposed to too much can be extremely harmful.

An essential oil overdose can occur by inhaling or consuming too much or applying too much to your skin. Some of the things that can happen when you overdose on essential oil include the following potential outcomes:

  • skin rash or burn
  • headache
  • nausea or vomiting
  • gastrointestinal issues
  • feeling weak
  • liver malfunction
  • coma
  • seizures
  • hallucinations or other altered mental state

2 – Allergic Reaction

While this isn’t exactly an issue of too much essential oil, it can fall into the same category. Some people may not react when exposed to a small amount, but when too much has been used, it can trigger an allergic reaction.

Try to only introduce one new oil at a time to your household. Then, when a new one is used, watch everyone to see if a reaction occurs. Make sure to watch your pets, too, as they can have allergies, as well.

3 – Photosensitivity

Citrus oils often cause sun sensitivity, so it’s important to avoid exposure before going outside. It can cause severe sunburn with blisters very quickly. You’ll experience pain, swelling, and potentially irreparable skin damage.

If you know you will be outside, try not to handle them at all. These oils include:

  • Lemon
  • Lime
  • Grapefruit
  • Orange
  • Bergamot

4 – These Products Might Interfere with Prescribed Medications

Some oils can interfere with essential prescribed medications when used too much or at all. Your best option is to discuss the oils you are using with your doctor. This way, you can determine if the oils may interfere with any of your medications.

If you want to use new essential oil, hold off until you can talk to your doctor. You don’t want to cause any major health issues when combining things that shouldn’t be mixed.

5 – Skin Irritations

Too much essential oil can cause severe skin irritations. Before applying any oil to your skin, you have to be sure to dilute it with a carrier oil. Common carrier oils include jojoba, coconut, and almond oil.

Generally, you should use one teaspoon of carrier oil for every three drops of essential oil. Once it is diluted, test it on a small patch of skin two to three hours before applying it to a larger area. If irritation, itching, or redness develops, don’t apply the mixture to any other body part.

Skin irritations from essential oil can vary in severity, too. Some of them may be mild, while others can cause a serious rash or loss of pigmentation.

6 – Asthma Attacks May Trigger from Too Much Essential Oil

When someone has asthma, too much essential oil can trigger an attack. An asthma attack can also occur if the diffuser is left on for too long, so remember to shut it off after half an hour.

essential oils

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7 – Headaches and Migraines

Exposure to and inhaling too much essential oil can cause headaches or migraines. This often happens if too much was put in the diffuser. Interestingly, some essential oils can ease headaches, instead, however.

8 – Pregnancy Complications and Decreased Milk Supply

Pregnant and nursing moms pay attention to what they eat and drink, but they should also pay attention to the oils they use. Not all oils are safe to use during pregnancy and when you are nursing.

When you are pregnant, the oils can cross the placenta and affect your baby. Essential oils get into your bloodstream and contaminate your milk, causing your baby to consume the oil. The oils that should be avoided include:

  • Wintergreen
  • Sage
  • Mugwort
  • Tarragon
  • Birch
  • Aniseed
  • Camphor
  • Hyssop
  • Parsley
  • Pennyroyal
  • Tansy
  • Thuja
  • Wormwood essential oil

Nursing moms should also avoid peppermint essential oil. It can drastically decrease your milk supply and be hard to get back.

How Much is Too Much Essential Oil?

Knowing how much essential oil is too much can get confusing because it’s different for each oil. It also depends on if you are diffusing it, applying it topically, or ingesting it. It’s best to keep that information handy, just as you would a dosage chart for a prescription.

Normally, it is safe to assume that a couple of drops of essential oil is enough for a diffuser. This will allow the fragrance into your home and the medicinal benefits to kick in.

Some oils aren’t safe for ingesting at all, so even a little bit can cause a problem. These oils include sage and eucalyptus, which can both cause seizures when consumed.

When an allergy is present, even a little can be too much. As stated before, only introduce one new oil at a time to your household and watch for any allergy symptoms.

If you are applying the oil to your skin, make sure to dilute it first. Then, test the mixture on a small skin area to ensure you don’t react to it.

Special Note on Essential Oils and Children

If you have a child in the home, you should be especially careful. Since their skin is still so thin, essential oils will be absorbed into the bloodstream more quickly. It’s important to keep them away from children at all times.

Store the oils in a place where children can’t reach them. If possible, store them with the medication so you have all the potentially harmful things in one place.

When you diffuse essential oils with a child in the room, consider doing a smaller amount than you normally would. Before diffusing anything, however, check if the oil you are using is safe for children.

How You Can Prevent Using Too Much Essential Oil

Now that you know the risks of overusing these products, it is important to know how to prevent it. Prevention is key when it comes to safety, and you won’t have any negative outcome this way. Some recommendations include these measures:

  • keep the dosage information for each oil readily available
  • don’t use the full dosage multiple times a day
  • use only high-quality essential oils without added chemicals
  • know the intended use of each oil and use them for only that
  • discuss which oils you use with your doctor to prevent medication interference
  • diluting the oils
  • prevent spills by placing diffusers in a safe spot and closing up oil containers
  • use carrier oil on your skin if accidental exposure happens. Water can make it worse
  • don’t run your diffuser all day long
  • store essential oils in a safe place, away from children
  • never apply oils on a child’s skin or a pet

too much essential oilFinal Thoughts on Science Explains What Happens to Your Body if You Use Too Much Essential Oil

While they are amazing when used correctly, you have to be careful not to use too much essential oil. Using too much can cause serious health problems, cause allergic reactions, and have other negative impacts.

This information is not intended to scare you away from the natural products. It is simply a guide to using them safely and know what can happen if you use too much essential oil.

By following the intended use and dosage guidelines, you’ll be on the right track to using them safely. Remember to keep them in a safe place and avoid leaks or spills from occurring.

Psychology Explains How Manipulators Shift Blame to Make It Look Like Your Fault

Abuse comes in many different forms, although a few aren’t as apparent as others. If you’ve ever been in a personal or professional relationship with a manipulator, you probably faced mental and emotional abuse. How do manipulators shift blame to others for their personal gain?

Not all manipulative personalities present as cruel, abusive villains. Many seem genuinely caring and may have good social skills. However, they cleverly use their psychologically warped craft to control people to make themselves look better.

If you know people past or present who are manipulative, you may have noticed that most of them are also narcissists. It may not seem evident at first, but their provocative and controlling nature is apparent. Relatives often use their familial ties to justify why you shouldn’t just walk away from them.

Why Do Manipulators Shift Blame?

These people are typically narcissistic personalities, and they care only for themselves and what they can get. If you are unfortunate enough to become entangled in their dark web of manipulation and abuse, it will be more apparent. They will do anything within their power to protect their delusion of perfection.

manipulators shift blameIf you confront them when they are at fault, don’t expect an admission or an apology. Rather than bruise their ego, they will deny any wrongdoing. They will also go to the extent of passing the blame unto you or someone else.

The Manipulator’s Toolbox

People don’t grow up with the goal of being a narcissist and master manipulator. However, these traits are usually seen at a young age. They often model manipulative parents and have years to cultivate their craft.

Even if manipulators must lie or do other unethical things, they will refuse to own up to wrongdoing. They would much rather let someone else take the fall for their trespasses. Here are some typical ways manipulators shift blame to make themselves look better.

1. They Use Drama

Manipulators often work best when they are in a crowd. If they are at fault, they may up the drama factor. They may get overly emotional and say things loud enough for everyone in the room to hear. With this clever ruse, manipulators shift blame to you, so it looks like you are the one who is being abusive.

2. They’re Constantly Digging up Bones

Another way a manipulator shifts blame to others is by bringing up the past when they are caught. Rather than to own up for their faults and failures, manipulators refuse to be anything but blameless.

To get the spotlight off them, they will quickly remind you of your past mistakes. They hope this ploy will move the blame to you. Often, the subject has nothing to do with the present situation. Manipulators are never without a shovel to dig up the past to use against you.

3. They Ignore Facts

It’s fascinating how manipulative personalities can suddenly claim amnesia when confronted with a fault. They want to ignore any facts or situations that point to their role in the wrongdoing. When you mention the issue, these narcissists may refuse to face the facts or act as if you are lying.

4. They Use Religious Exploitation

If you consider some of the most infamous religious cults and abuse cases, you’ll discover a delusional and narcissistic leader as the common denominator. When manipulation and psychological abuse flourishes, the victims will follow their leader no matter what happens.

Even if you aren’t in a cult, you may still be challenged with spiritual abuse. Religious manipulators shift blame to others by suggesting that you aren’t holy enough to “God’s standards.”

When you experience a loss or a difficult situation, these people are quick to blame it on something you did to displease heaven. Don’t fall for this emotional abuse. Religion is supposed to boost people spiritually and enrich their lives, not tear them down. Anyone who uses religion to manipulate others is not someone worth your time.

5. They Like Playing the Martyr

Nobody likes to be at fault, but honest and mature people will confess their wrongs and make amends. However, manipulative people will do anything within their power to push the blame over someone else, so they look innocent. One tactic they often use is to play the victim card.

Do you know someone who would rather play a martyr than to admit to a fault or failure? These narcissists prey on your compassionate nature to gain your pity. They will use a past loss or grievous situation (real or imagined) as an excuse to deflect any blame from themselves.

6. They Love Emotional Manipulation

Narcissistic personalities are skilled actors, and they know exactly what words to say or emotions to display to manipulate those around them. No doubt, you’ve seen manipulators shift the blame on others by turning on the waterworks when they are confronted for doing wrong.

They burst into a torrent of crocodile tears in hopes that you will feel sorry for them instead of making them confess. On the flip side, some manipulators use fear as a tactic to tiptoe around blame. These abusive people will often use rage and intimidation when they are called to task for faults. It’s a standard tool used by those who are physically, verbally, and sexually abusive.

abusive narcissist

These ten signs unmask an abusive narcissist.

7. They’re the Classic Social Bully

When narcissists are in a room of people, they want to be the ones who are seen and heard. They want all the attention and often dominate the conversation, so nobody else has a say. Should the situation go south, these manipulative personalities become defensive and ready to blame others.

They will often talk louder and over top of the crowd to get their point across. If they are to blame for anything, they use their voice and aggression to change the subject. Substance abuse usually makes their social bullying even worse.

8. They Love Gaslighting

This is a recent psychological term that describes how abusive personalities can manipulate others. They use their skills to make another person feel mentally unstable and to blame for everything wrong in their lives.

For example, you may confront a narcissist for infidelity. Instead of confessing, he may gaslight you into thinking it’s all your imagination and may question your sanity. He might also imply that you are accusing him of cheating to block your guilty conscience because you are the cheater.

9. They Use the Big Switch

Another classic way a manipulator shifts blame to others is to cloud the confrontation with irrelevant topics. If their excuses don’t work, they may try to tear you down with abusive language and verbal attacks on your character. They might degrade how you look, your intelligence, and your trustworthiness.

For example, you may confront him about stealing money out of the family budget for his chronic gambling addiction. Of course, he isn’t going to listen, even if you show him irrefutable evidence. He may lash out and say that the reason he gambles is that you are such a nag that he needs an outlet.

10. They Love Telling Lies

Remember that narcissists are willing to do almost anything to keep their rouge. While they will sometimes distort the facts when they are manipulating you, they aren’t above outright lying to reverse the blame.

This is a particularly harmful tactic because lies can destroy lives, especially when other people believe them. Even manipulative people can’t find a reasonable excuse to blame others for their shortcomings; they may create lies as a distraction.

Strangely, narcissists usually feel justified by lying to others if it means making themselves look good.

11. They Gain Pleasure by Manipulating Those Around You

What can narcissists do when they’ve exhausted every manipulative tool against you to no avail? They will turn to family and friends in your inner circle. If they can’t manipulate you, they will use those around you to cast a shadow of doubt on your character.

They will use one or all the above ploys to place any blame on you and make you look like the villain. At first, they will usually bring one or more people into their confidence. Then, they will use drama, emotional tactics, fake humility, and blatant lies to get those closest to you on their “side.”

Be aware that manipulative narcissists will use any opportunity to make you look bad, especially in a crowd. While you may have realized their abusive tricks, others may not be as psychologically savvy. As they put on a stellar performance of tears and vulnerability, you’ll be the one who looks bad.

manipulators shift blameFinal Thoughts On Manipulators and Blame Shifting

Never allow yourself to become a pawn when manipulators shift blame to you and others. These toxic personalities will never own up to their shortcomings and stop the abuse cycle without professional help.

If you have an unhealthy relationship with a lover, family member, friend, or coworker, now is the time to walk away with your sanity and dignity intact.

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