Weekly tips, affirmations, and small actions to feel your best.

15 Daily Self Care Tips Most People Ignore

Do you find that you’re so busy caring about everything and everyone in your life that you end up putting your own needs last? It’s a common problem for many people. When you constantly put your needs on hold, your health and sense of well-being can suffer. You need a good plan for daily self care!

Why is self care so critical?

Self-care is taking time to do what benefits your mental and physical health. Self-care helps you achieve these outcomes:

  • Manage stress
  • Lowers your anxiety
  • Reduces your risk of getting sick
  • Improves your energy and stamina

Research shows that even seemingly small self-care daily habits impact your health and happiness.

20 Daily Self Care Tips Most People Overlook

Your self-care might look different from someone else, but that’s okay. Find what works best for you and incorporate it into your daily or weekly schedule. Here are some daily self care tips that most people overlook.

daily self care1 – Spend time alone

Getting some time by yourself seems luxurious when you have a busy life. But it could be the self-care that you need to get recharged and refreshed. A study found that “spending time alone” was the fifth-most restful activity people liked to do. Whether you read a book or binge-watch a favorite television show, try spending some time alone this week to practice a little self-care.

2 – Unplug for some daily self care time

Life revolves around your phone and computer. But once in a while, you need to take a break from technology. Unplugging gives your brain a rest. It gives you the chance to listen to your thoughts and focus on what makes you happy. Sit in a cozy chair with your coffee in your hand and think. You may be surprised by how pleasant it is. Getting unplugged can help you not relax but connect to some simple pleasures in your life.

3 – Add a brisk walk to your self care checklist

Going for a daily walk can do wonders for your mind and body. Walking has so many benefits. Some of them include the following:

  • Lose weight: Walking just 30 minutes a day tone your body and help you burn calories.
  • Improve your health: Individuals who walk regularly are less apt to have a heart attack or stroke.
  • Lowers your cholesterol: Regular walking lowers your blood pressure and raises your HDL, healthy cholesterol. It also lowers your LDL, which is bad cholesterol.
  • Improve your mood: Walking makes you feel happier. When you walk, your body releases hormones that give you a sense of pleasure and make you feel more optimistic.
  • Reduces stress: While you walk, breathe in the fresh air and enjoy the sunshine. You can let go of tension and stress.

4 – Buy a small luxury for yourself

Sometimes it’s the little things that have a significant impact, like treating yourself to a small luxury. It’s a simple way to take care of yourself. The item doesn’t need to be expensive, but just something to help you feel special. You could get a new outfit or some special dessert plates, or a cute beaded bracelet. Whatever you choose, enjoy the pleasure of doing something nice for yourself for a change.

5 – Write in a self care journal

Journaling is a helpful way to get your thoughts out of your head and onto paper. Research suggests that journaling can decrease your mental distress, increase your sense of well-being and improve the quality of your life. There are so many nice looking journals, so pick the one you love. Purchase the perfect pen and start writing. Try to not just write down your problems in your self-care journal, but also note what you’re grateful for, plus the positive things that happened to you each day.

6 – Sleep is essential to daily self care

Sleep is one of the most overlooked self-care tips on your self-care checklist. Getting good quality sleep isn’t always easy with little kids, a busy social life, and a demanding career. But if you’re committed to good self-care, then it may be time to make sleep a priority. Here are some tips for getting good sleep:

  • Keep a sleep routine: Try to keep a routine bedtime every night.
  • Keep your bedroom for sleeping: Remove your television, desk, and exercise equipment from your bedroom. Make it a room just for sleeping or sex.
  • Don’t eat too close to your bedtime: Eat your last meal several hours before you retire for the night.
  • Turn off your phone and computer: An hour before you retire, reduce your exposure to blue light devices. Blue lights affect your brain, so you can’t fall asleep if you’re on them near bedtime.
  • Relax: At least two hours before your bedtime, relax. Take a bath, read a book or sit outside on your patio and enjoy the stars.

Aim to get at least seven to nine hours of sleep every night. If you cannot sleep, try a natural remedy like melatonin or a supplement of calcium and magnesium.

7 – Stay connected to your friends and family

Part of self care means staying connected with your friends and loved ones. These relationships are essential to you, and not getting time with them can harm your life. These relationships provide you with emotional support as well as practical help. Research suggests that you have a decreased risk of disease when you’re in high-quality, close relationships. So, get that hug from your grandma. It’s an excellent way to take care of yourself.

daily self care8 – Lower your stress level

Self care is understanding what causes you to feel stressed and avoiding it. Perhaps you find your commute to work incredibly stressful, or your busy weekends stress you out. Could you take the train to work instead of driving? Could you do less on the weekends to give you time to rest?

One family took a break from their kids’ sporting events for a year. On the weekends, the family visited local museums and parks. The entire family felt it was a less stressful year and helped them grow closer as a family.

9 – Play a game

Games are a great stress reliever. Whether you choose to play a board game with your family or friends or select an online word game, it’s a great way to let go of tension. Plus, playing games stimulates your brain and makes you feel relaxed.

10 – Eat healthy snacks

If you’re aiming for better self care, don’t forget about your snacking habits. Try eating to nurture your body rather than trying to reduce calories. For instance, eat foods higher in protein to offset your hunger for a more extended period. Choose high-protein foods like:

  • Nuts
  • Hard-boiled eggs
  • Lean meats
  • Peanut butter
  • Yogurt

Eating healthier proteins helps you avoid a carbohydrate blood sugar crash that zaps your strength and makes you foggy-brained.

11 – Read (a top self care idea for many!)

Reading is a natural way to relax. Researchers found that leisure reading improves your health. If you’re not much for long reads, try reading some short self care quotes. The benefits of reading include the following:

  • Reduced stress
  • Better ability to think
  • Better communication skills
  • Improved understanding

You can listen to audiobooks to get the same effect as a regular reading session. Find a cozy chair, close your eyes and let the audiobook transport you to another place.

12 – Exercise

Regular exercise is a simple way to take care of yourself. Walking thirty minutes a day boosts your mood and improves your health. Whether you break it up and walk for ten minutes during your lunch break and twenty later in the evening, small amounts of exercise are just as beneficial.

13 – Try relaxing with music

Music is therapeutic. Most people don’t realize that music is an easy way to improve your mood and reduce anxiety and stress. Music makes you feel happier and

14 – Declutter

Did you know that decluttering your house can improve your mood? When there is clutter around you, you’re more likely to feel stressed and anxious. Living in a cluttered space will raise your cortisol levels. Tackling a messy closet or room for just a few minutes will make you feel more in control of the area and less stressed.

15 – Get a massage

Self care is essential for your physical and mental health. Scheduling a massage is a great way to increase your relaxation and lower your stress. Massages reduce your heart rate, calm your mind and body. Other benefits of a weekly massage include

  • Increased relaxation
  • Reduced joint pain
  • Less muscle soreness
  • Better circulation
  • More energy
  • Feeling more alert
  • Lower blood pressure
  • Lower your heart rate

daily self careFinal thoughts on Trying These Daily Self Care Tips

If you’re busy taking care of everyone and everything in your life, maybe it’s time to schedule some self-care time for yourself. Taking care of yourself is essential to be the best person you can be at work, home, or school. It’s not selfish to want to get a break from life’s busyness. Self care is different for everyone, but hopefully, one of these tips helps you incorporate some self care into your daily routine.

16 Perfect Affirmations for Your Self Care Routine

Positive affirmations can help improve your self care routine by helping you prioritize yourself. Using these phrases can remind you of the good things in your life. Plus, they’ll help you take care of yourself and spend time focusing on these self care ideas.

It’s easy to fall into negative habits, including putting yourself down or telling yourself you don’t deserve self care. However, you deserve time each day to focus on yourself, doing things you love or relaxing. You must prioritize yourself and spend time focusing on self care if you want to be happy.

Affirmations are most powerful when you say them out loud, and you can try looking in a mirror as you repeat them. If you can’t say them out loud, you can repeat them in your mind instead. Either way, they will help you along with your self care plan.

Affirmations to Add to Your Self Care Routine

Consider writing your favorite affirmation down and posting them in an area you frequently see. With constant reminders and positivity running through your mind, your self care routine will improve. You’ll notice that all other areas of your life improve, too.

self care routine1. I know that my life is a gift, and I enjoy every minute of it.

This phrase reaffirms how great life is when you look for all the good parts of it. You aren’t guaranteed another day, so embrace the life you’ve been given and make the most of it. When you can enjoy every minute of your life, you’ll find that it all becomes easier as you become more resilient.

If you add this affirmation to your self care routine, you’ll start finding the joy right away. The time spent on yourself will help you appreciate your body along with another day to live in it. Then, you’ll feel positive and more fulfilled as you go about the rest of your day.

2. I am thankful for all of the things that I can do.

You only get one body and mind, so be thankful for what you can do with it—express gratitude for living freely and doing all of the things you need or love to do. When you’re grateful for these things, you’ll find joy in the other aspects of life that you overlooked before.

3. I am well-rested and relaxed.

If you tell yourself that you’re well-rested and relaxed, you’ll begin to feel that way. You believe the words you speak and the thoughts that go through your mind. Make sure you stay positive so that you’re constantly reaffirming good things in your life.

4. I listen to and trust my body.

If you listen to signs from your body, you’ll likely know when something is wrong. Once you recognize the signal, trust that you must quickly change to improve your health and well-being. Sometimes, it might be as simple as getting more sleep, but don’t ignore more significant issues.

5. I feel negativity leave my body as positivity takes over.

As you repeat this affirmation, visualize the negativity flowing out through your toes and fingertips. Visualization helps you feel better and experience positivity sooner. As the negativity leaves, begin thinking positive thoughts about the situation that you are in right now.

6. I embrace my imperfections and love myself fully.

Everyone has imperfections, and these unique qualities are worth embracing. If everyone were the same, the world wouldn’t be the exciting place that it is. As you go through your self care routine, use this affirmation to learn to love yourself fully.

7. I practice self-love because I deserve love and happiness.

You don’t need anyone else to give you the love that you deserve. Practice self-love, and you’ll always experience love and happiness, no matter who is in your life. When you can turn to yourself for love, you’ll never feel lonely again.

Adding this affirmation to your self care routine reaffirms your value and worth. It reminds you that you deserve love and that you have everything you need already.

8. I have already done so much, so I know that I can handle anything.

Think of all that you have accomplished so far in life. You have gotten through everything in the past, and you’ll only continue overcoming things now and in the future. When you add this affirmation to your routine, you’ll feel more confident as you go about your day.

As you repeat the affirmation, think of the things you are most proud of in your life. Plus, think of all the things you have overcome to get to the place you’re in today.

self care routine9. I am kind to myself and my body.

When you are kind to yourself, you’ll take better care of your mind and body. By using this affirmation during self-care, you’ll embrace your time a little more thoroughly. Then, you’ll be more likely to take breaks to take care of yourself throughout the day.

Once you start being more kind to yourself, you’ll notice improvements in all areas of your life. You’ll think clearer and more positively, and you’ll physically feel better.

10. I take care of my body because it takes care of me.

This affirmation reminds you that taking care of your body is essential. Your body is what keeps you alive, so you must put in the effort and take the time to take care of yourself. Repeat this affirmation during your self care time to ensure that you remain mindful throughout the experience.

11. I try new things and learn from my experiences.

Try some new self care activities to encourage yourself to try new things. When you’re relaxed, you’ll be more open to new things, so using this affirmation can further your courage. Remind yourself that you’ll learn from your experience and get better each time you try.

12. I am happy with who I am, and I don’t need to change.

There is no better feeling than being entirely happy with who you are. You can be pleased with yourself despite your imperfections because we are all still learning. Stop waiting for perfections to embrace who you are, and use this affirmation to become happier with yourself.

13. I am a strong person, and I’m only getting stronger.

You are strong enough to get through anything, and now is the perfect time to remind yourself of that. As you go through your self care routine, this affirmation will help you recognize your inner strength. Then, you’ll begin building on that strength, developing it to help you get through hard times later on.

14. I take care of myself with healthy foods to fuel my body.

Self-care is about more than pampering yourself and spending time relaxing. Taking care of yourself is also about eating healthy foods that give you sustainable nutrients. As you improve your diet, you’ll notice that you have more energy and feel better overall.

Many people don’t realize or acknowledge that the foods they choose to eat can affect their well-being. This affirmation will keep that fact at the forefront of your mind as you go through your day. Once you make a habit of choosing healthy foods, you will notice a drastic improvement in your life.

15. I permit myself to relax and have fun.

Sometimes you might need permission to have fun and let loose. If you struggle to relax during your self care time, use this affirmation until you feel the tension ease up. Your mind might race with thoughts of work or other life problems, but push them away and focus on the present.

As you focus on what you’re doing at the moment, you’ll become more aware of your positive thoughts. Repeat this affirmation as you begin your self care time, and you’ll find that relaxation and fun come a little easier.

16. I find and embrace the joy in each day.

Your self care routine might be the highlight of your day, and that is okay. Using this affirmation during your routine can help you embrace the joy that comes along with self care. Plus, the phrase will help you recognize joyful moments throughout the day, too.

self care routineFinal Thoughts on Affirmations to Add to Your Self Care Routine

Let’s end with this thoughtful self-care quote and a few final notes:

“Be you, love you. All ways, always.”
― Alexandra Elle

Your self care routine is a necessary time to focus on positivity and self-improvement. Using these affirmations during your self care time can help you relax and make you feel comfortable taking time for yourself. Plus, they remind you of what self care truly means.

Make the most of your self care routine by implementing some of these positive affirmations. They’ll help you embrace the time to focus on yourself, and you’ll get in touch with your innermost thoughts and feelings. Then, you can improve all areas of your life as you address any issues or stressors.

Your self care routine can set the tone for your entire week, so make sure it’s a beneficial experience. Adjust the affirmations to customize them for your situation, or use them just as they are. Either way, you’ll notice the life-changing improvements that come along with positive affirmations.

Milwaukee Bus Driver Helps an Elderly Man Get Back on His Feet

On a snowy day in Milwaukee, bus driver Kaniquka Jackson made one man’s day a little better. As usual, she parked at a bus stop off Route 14 near the Bayshore Town Centre in Glendale.

While waiting for people to board the bus, she noticed an elderly man walking through the snow. The snow had begun to pile up, and the man tripped while crossing a snow bank. Kaniquka immediately jumped out of her seat and ran out into the cold, snowy conditions to help him.

A real-life hero

She and another bystander quickly got him to his feet. Kaniquka then took the man’s walker onto the bus for him, and came back to help him on board. In the viral video, you can see her walking with an arm around the man for support. After ensuring he boarded safely, the kind-hearted bus driver told him to take a seat.

She showed him where she’d placed his walker, then asked if he was alright. She asked him if his knee hurt, and if she should call for help. However, he assured her he was okay. Luckily, he’d only taken a light fall, but without Kaniquka’s help, the situation could’ve been much worse.

The Milwaukee County Transit System (MCTS) honored the bus driver for her kindness, posting the video on their website. The video quickly went viral, being shared all over the world. Actor Christopher Meloni, who plays a detective on Law & Order SVU, even reposted the story. He retweeted the MCTS video and hashtagged it “superhero.”

The bus driver’s compassion and quick response have certainly earned her recognition. People like Kaniquka make the world a better place by simply reaching out a helping hand. If we all look out for others like this bus driver did, we can create so much positivity together.

Luckily, so many good people live on this planet, and you can always find kindness if you look for it. You may not hear about it on mainstream news, but we will always share the positive stories with you. The people below are also everyday heroes, making the world brighter one act of kindness at a time.

mcta employeeOther people who have made a positive impact on the world

Let’s meet some incredibly kind and positive people.

1. Instead of asking her parents for birthday presents, this little girl asked for donations.

She wanted to donate toys and birthday supplies to The Happy Birthday Project, an organization that throws birthday parties for children in need.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Jackie Nguyen (@ms_jaxnguyen)

2. This woman, Ms. Sandy, decided to show her gratitude for police officers by treating them all to Subway for lunch.

3. As a huge fan of Anthony Bourdain, one kind woman created a movement called #Bourdainitforward.

It encourages people to do good deeds involving food or mental health/suicide awareness. She decided to spread a little kindness by buying dinner for a single Dad with three children!

 

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A post shared by Marie Cardona (@iammarie_raquel)

4. These kind-hearted young boys wanted to make the world a bit brighter by handing out flowers at a nursing home.

(Note: This happened pre-pandemic)

 

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A post shared by Tina Tower (@tina_tower)

5. A barbershop in Houston, Texas, dedicates time each Monday to giving haircuts to the homeless.

Hairstylists travel around the city with their supplies to do free hair appointments on the spot.

6. A marathon runner in Honduras didn’t care about winning the race.

He helped his blind friend make it to the finish line by tying a string around both of their hands so they could stay together.

 

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A post shared by Robbie Mullinax (@robbiemullinax)

7. At a Dairy Queen drive-thru in northern Minnesota, 900 people paid for the car behind them.

The pay-it-forward chain lasted for a whole two-and-a-half days!

8. A dying woman wanted to see her favorite hockey team play one last time.

Fans helped made sure it happened, helping carry her into the arena where she watched the game from her bed.

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9. Police officers in Detroit got a call about a man standing on an overpass attempting to take his life. Truck drivers passing through the area lined up underneath the bridge to save him.

10. An anonymous patron at a restaurant paid for a man’s meal.

What made it even more special was the fact it was his birthday lunch!

It is stuff like this humans that makes me still have faith in humans – and to even make it better it was a birthday lunch with wife and baby and no one knew! Thanks anonymous nice person!
byu/MuuaadDib inpics

11. A restaurant posted a sign on its doors saying they’d be closed on Thanksgiving.

However, they’d be eating inside with friends and family. The owners invited anyone who didn’t have family or needed a meal to dine with them.

View post on imgur.com

12. In the brutal winter months, a warm coat, gloves, and a hat are essential.

Homeless people are very vulnerable as many don’t have access to these items. In one city, someone decided to hang bags full of winter clothes on street posts for anyone needing them.

View post on imgur.com

13. Unfortunately, one man’s bank account got hacked right before a father-son camping trip.

He had only enough money to get to the campsite and back. When he woke up the next morning, a nearby camper had left $20 on his windshield. Whether you call it karma or fate, humans are pretty amazing sometimes!

The day before I was to take my son camping my bank screwed me over. We left for our trip with just enough cash for gas there and back. But some wonderful strangers paid us a random act of kindness. We found this on our car in the morning.
byu/Starample inpics

14. After his house flooded in Hurricane Sandy, one man and his pregnant wife had to move out.

When they came to check on their house, a stranger had left money in an envelope on their door.

Random Act of Kindness, My pregnant wife and I found this on our door after checking on our house at night. No contact info, no name or anything. I want to thank this person and hug them for making us happy.(House flooded from Hurricane Sandy)
byu/billdaff inpics

Final thoughts about the Milwaukee bus driver and other amazing humans in this world

If you take the time to notice, you’ll see that this world is overflowing with kindness and love. Sure, it has its problems, but the good far outweighs the bad. Some people have dedicated their whole lives to feeding, clothing, and helping people in general.

However, every little act of kindness, no matter how large or small, creates a ripple effect. No act of selfless service is too small. If we want to create a more harmonious world, let’s start today by being the change we wish to see.

Like these incredible humans, we can all make a difference somehow. Have you ever witnessed or taken part in an act of kindness? We’d love to hear about it in the comments!

How Being Obsessed With Winning Makes You Stressed and Anxious

Are you obsessed with winning?

Everyone wants to win, but many people don’t have the drive to get there. On the flip side, though, there are people with all the drive that they can muster, a razor-sharp focus on the concept of winning, and a powerful idealization of the result of such success.

Yes, on the surface, it sounds like being obsessed with winning is a good thing. Wanting success so badly that you’ll do anything for it is how many of us have been conditioned to achieve our goals. But that may be working against you. And it’s damaging your mental health, too. Here’s how being obsessed with winning makes you more stressed and anxious.

1.    Your Focus Shifts When Obsessed With Winning

The goal of winning is a perfectly sound one, and many people have one. But there’s a difference between wanting something and being obsessed with it. When you’re too obsessed with winning, your focus changes. So your priorities shift to make the concept of simply “winning” your entire life and goal.

This kind of focus shift can damage your emotional and mental wellbeing, adding stress to your life from these lofty goals and making you anxious with every perceived “loss.” If all you want to do is win, the things that usually help you feel better don’t work out. Here are some ways that your focus may shift so that stress and anxiety are heightened.

obsessed with winning·         You Forget Your Passions

Winning can be all-consuming, and it can make you forget that passions aren’t things you need to win at. Sometimes, passions can even be wholly separated from something where you face competition. Without passion in your life, you’ll lose positive thinking and feel more anxious and stressed out, and you may even lose your sense of passion because of how much you focus on “winning” it rather than simply enjoying it.

·         You Forget What Truly Matters

Did you know that the happiest people who claim to have led the best, most positive lives never consider “winning” to be among the reasons for their happiness? That’s because research shows that the happiest people are those who focus on what matters: loved ones, loved activities, and what makes you truly happy outside of all the competition. Your obsession with winning can rob you of that happiness, which doesn’t help your mental state.

·         You Focus On Other People’s Ideas Of Winning

Not everyone has the exact definition of what it means to “win,” and you need to define what that success would look like and mean to you. Unfortunately, an obsession with winning will make you focus on other people’s ideas of what success is to them, and you’ll chase – and maybe even achieve – these things and still feel empty inside. That’s a quick way to get stressed out from all your effort and anxious from all your perceived inability to find a “win”!

2.    You Damage Your Social Relationships

The relationships you have with others are essential. You need at least a small positive support system to have your best mental health, and anxiety and stress may begin to mount when you don’t have that in your life. And, of course, the strain of managing complex social interactions is often a source of negative emotions that can ruin your stress levels. Here are some ways that an obsession with winning damages social relationships:

·         You Lash Out

An obsession with winning can turn you into a sore loser. When you don’t win, you lash out harshly at the people around you, hurting them due to something petty and relatively unimportant and thus damaging your relationships with them.

·         You Turn Everything Into A Contest

People want to have fun. But you also want to win, and that can put a real damper on an otherwise enjoyable time. No one wants to hang out with someone who takes everything way too seriously. If you keep ruining game nights, it’s time to chill out.

·         You Try To One-Up Everyone

A little healthy competition is a good thing, but sometimes you need to support and be supported by those around you. Others have successes and wins that they want to celebrate, too, and it’s not all about you and how much better you think you’re doing. One-upping everyone is pointless and is a poor attempt at attention-grabbing that will get tiresome for people.

3.    You Compare Yourself To Others

Obsession with winning means obsession with competition, so you’re going to start checking out the people who you consider your competition. This makes you ripe for falling into the trap of constant self-comparison. You might:

  • Attempt to match up with the progress and work of others, even if their methods don’t work well for you
  • Change your ideas of success regularly to be “whatever the person closest to the finish line has.”
  • Desire the wins of others, even when there’s no possible way to get them due to separate contexts and circumstances
  • Become complacent when you think you’re further ahead than others, setting yourself up for a “tortoise and the hare” type of situation
  • Become discouraged when you can’t seem to have precisely what other people do

Some kinds of self-comparison can be helpful. Looking to people who are successful for inspiration is a fantastic way to learn from them and apply knowledge to yourself. But there’s a line to draw with that motivation. Too much comparison and your positive thinking drop as you desperately try to keep up with what you see in others.

Comparison is always a little flawed because you know all your worst sides, but you only see the positive sides that they choose to show to the world in others. You don’t know what is going on in the lives of others, what is helping them, and what their journey is, so you’ll never have an accurate comparison here.

obsessed with winning4.    You Don’t Practice Self-Care

To achieve success accurately, you must be in good health. It is challenging to give chasing a goal your all when you’re tired or burned out. Unfortunately, an obsession with “winning” tends to make you push yourself too hard. You’ll be unable to focus on what you need and may not even realize that those needs are screaming for your attention!

Of course, all acts of “winning” can require a little bit of sacrifice. But that shouldn’t come at the cost of self-care. Without self-care, your stress and anxiety will mount as your positive thinking depletes. Believe it or not, part of successfully winning is knowing when to rest and give yourself a break! Make sure you:

  • Get enough sleep. It would be best if you were aiming to achieve at least seven hours of nightly sleep.
  • Eat and drink well. Your body requires the proper nourishment to stay strong, and you can’t win without the right nutrients.
  • If you feel tired, listen to your body. You will need to set some things out and even back out of a few things. That’s okay!
  • Pencil it regular “me-time” for your schedule where you’re not allowed to do anything other than rest. Then do something that isn’t related to your goals of winning.

5.    You Focus On Preparation, Not Doing

To win, some degree of preparation is needed. It would be best if you had the right tools, suitable equipment and may even need to be strategic about things. But all that focus on preparation has a limit. At some point, you need to do, not just think about doing and get ready for action.

An obsession with winning can cause you to focus so much on the desire to win that you lose sight of the fact that you need to make an effort to get there. You may constantly wait for the “right time,” assuming that other people’s success is only due to their tools and trick yourself into thinking that what you’re doing is wise and a mark of patience. In reality, you’re avoiding action and delaying the vital part of the competition!

Over time, all the anticipation you collect from “getting read” can cause anxiety and stress, and it’s a deadly cycle. That stress and anxiety can then make you feel like you need to prepare more. The sad part is that you could’ve gotten so much farther if you’d just stopped “preparing” and started “doing”! Preparation cannot prevent failure; the best way to succeed is to keep trying actively.

6.    You Aren’t Grateful For Wins

Gratitude is one of the critical components of positive mental health. You can often be anxious and stressed when you’re not grateful. Worse yet, a lack of gratitude may even contribute to a lower chance of “winning” in the way you want to.

Here’s why:

  • Gratitude allows you to focus on the good things in life, finding silver linings in even the darkest clouds. When you don’t have an appreciation, difficult times become sources of disappointment that prevent you from striving for wins and facing hurdles head-on.
  • Gratitude teaches you to be grateful for the lessons that come with your losses. In turn, this outlook helps you win more. When you’re not thankful, you take losses personally as a massive sign of your failings. You can’t learn from them. Thus, you tend to make the same mistakes again and again.
  • Gratitude is critical to have in life, and it can rewire your brain to train itself on positive things. That’s the kind of mindset you need to win and be successful. But ironically, you can’t find that mindset if you’re too obsessed with winning.

pop memeFinal Thoughts On How Being Obsessed With Winning Makes Us Stressed And Anxious

The world has convinced us that we must constantly be on our “grind” to win, but that’s not how humans behave. It would be best if you were motivated to win and desire to do so, but don’t take it to the point of obsession. You’ll only make yourself anxious and stressed out!

Why Some Mature People Prefer to Remain Single

It’s considered normal for everyone to find a long-term relationship eventually. There’s even some negative social stigma against those who never couple up. Singles may be viewed (unfairly) as loners or as those with sad, unfulfilling lives. But if that were true, why do so many mature people actively choose singlehood?

The truth is that there are many benefits to being single. It’s just like there are many benefits to being in a relationship! The only difference is which benefits a person values more. Someone who wants to put themselves and their growth first may prefer to remain unattached. Here are four reasons why mature people prefer to stay single.

1.    Fewer Commitments Mean More Freedom

There’s nothing wrong with being committed to someone. But at specific points in their lives, some mature individuals desire freedom over that sort of responsibility. They recognize that there are many things they want to do that would become more burdensome if commitments are present.

As such, these individuals know the more responsible thing to do is to focus on enjoying that freedom until they’re ready. This freedom can include:

·         Time

In a relationship, you spend lots of time with your partner. Hours a week are spent texting, hanging out, dating, and doing various things with them. It’s great to devote some of your time to a partner. And you can (and should) carve out me-time just for yourself, even in a long-term and very committed relationship. But mature individuals who want more time to spend will appreciate that being single affords this effortlessly. They’re not constrained by the responsibilities of making time for a partner. This allows them to do more things for themselves, their family, friends, and hobbies. Their schedule is entirely their own to dictate.

mature people·         Compromises and Lack Thereof

A relationship only really thrives with regular compromise from those within it. This applies to serious things most of the time, but it also applies to random, casual, and fun events. You have to take turns to decide who picks movies, which can be a bummer if you have different tastes. You need to go rock-paper-scissors on where you eat – if you can choose where to eat! It would help if you considered your partner’s opinions for many things when you commit to another person. Mature individuals who choose to stay single appreciate that they don’t need to compromise to keep everything peaceful.

·         Travel

Traveling with a partner is possible, but it can be more complicated. You have double the concerns about taking leave, collecting travel documents, and financial needs during that trip. And while you can travel alone despite being in a relationship, you’ll miss your partner while you’re gone! Plus, being single allows you to be more spontaneous. When in a relationship, it’s reasonable to include your partner in planning discussions. As a singleton, you can travel with no hesitation and on a whim.

Remember that this does not suggest that committed relationships are constraining or imprisoning. It merely means that at different points in life, other people want different levels of responsibilities!

2.    There’s More Room To Grow

Life is all about learning and growing as you go. Mature people tend to cherish that much about building experiences and collecting knowledge. For the sake of their continual improvement, they may decide that remaining single is the best option.

This doesn’t mean that committed relationships stifle growth. But, just like having more freedom as a singleton, you can’t deny that you have more opportunities when you’re unattached. This is something that mature people may find attractive concept. Here are some areas where there’s more room for growth when you’re single.

·         Growth Between Events

A lot of people experience something called repetition compulsion. This compulsion indicates that individuals tend to rush into situations where they’ll repeat their past mistakes without thinking. Research shows us that it’s widespread in relationships. This is why rebound relationships often have the same toxic patterns as the previous partnership did. Mature people may prefer to remain single to process previous events from a failed relationship properly. They may want to grow, improve, and dig at the roots of past pain before they feel ready to move forward. For some, this may include an understanding that they strongly prefer to remain single long-term.

·         Career Focus

Having a relationship while working means you must juggle your personal and professional life well. It’s perfectly respectable that many individuals like or are satisfied with this balancing act. But it’s also reasonable for mature people to appreciate the opposite more! The ability to dedicate yourself to a career entirely is something that those in long-term relationships can’t always do. A mature individual may want to focus solely on their job before seeking a relationship.

·         Resilience

Resilience, or the ability to bounce back from traumatic or adverse events, is a highly positive trait. It’s crucial for surviving the ups and downs of existence, and studies show that singletons have more of it! It makes sense, then, that someone of a mature age may still want to stay uncommitted. It allows them to develop this skill to bring their best self forward.

·         Self-Sufficiency

You get used to having someone always around or with you in a relationship. You have someone to rely on constantly; honestly, that’s beautiful! On the flip side, though, not everyone wants that kind of reliance, even if they recognize its merits. There’s a lot of power in being fully self-sufficient. You can learn to be autonomous in a relationship, but developing that skill is much easier when you’re single. Studies have shown that those who choose to stay single above the age of forty can develop better self-sufficiency. This attitude affords them improved positive thinking and life satisfaction.

3.    They Are Generally Healthier

Science has shown us time and time again that being married is often correlated with worse health. This outcome is especially true for women but applies to any gender. A mature person who wants to be their healthiest self may prefer a single life. Some parts of life are healthier when you’re unattached, backed by research.

mature people·         Physical Activity

Exercise is essential for overall health; you’re more likely to get it if you’re single. Married individuals get the slightest physical activity overall, and those who have never been married get the most of it. According to research, this also says that divorced people are more active than married ones to boot. This may be because they have more time and energy to exercise. Regardless, mature people may see this as an excellent reason to stay unattached!

·         Healthy Weight

When you’re single, you ironically often put more effort into your appearance and health. You constantly strive to be your best self; mature individuals can like that about being uncommitted. Studies show that married adults are significantly more likely to have a too-high Body Mass Index or BMI. This extra weight means they have a higher risk of being overweight or obese. An unhealthy weight can decrease positive thinking, disease risk, and other health problems.

·         Stress Management

Anyone can experience stress, whether single or in a relationship. But being single often comes with fewer stressors than a relationship does. You won’t need to worry about a commitment and your responsibility to it. You won’t have to learn to manage conflict with someone unique in such close quarters. And you won’t need to navigate the other person’s stressors, too! It’s easy to see why some mature individuals consider relationships a significant source of stress and prefer to remain single. They may find that they can manage stress in much more positive ways to focus on themselves alone.

·         Financial Health

Being single means only having to pay for yourself. You don’t need to spend money on a partner, suitable houses or vehicles for couples, or potential children. You can split the money with a partner to pay bills, but you also have more. Mature individuals who want to focus on saving money may therefore prefer a single life. Debt.org’s research shows that singletons are less likely to incur serious credit card debt!

4.    They Have Better Other Relationships

When you’re in a long-term, committed romantic relationship, it takes precedence over others. Or, at the very least, it’s on equal terms with your other meaningful relationships. Mature people who value their non-romantic bonds may not want to compromise by adding a romantic one to their list. Here are some scientific ways that being single can help in this regard:

·         Acts Of Compassion

When you’re single, you’re more likely to extend help and aid to the people around you, says research. Some even believe that singletons are the social glue of many groups! Mature people who want to be of better aid to their community may enjoy being single for this reason.

·         Diversity

People don’t consciously choose their friends for their differences or similarities. Still, studies say that when you’re in a relationship, you’re less likely to explore and make friends from different backgrounds. You don’t have as much time to enter new spaces and try novel things, so your friends are all quite similar. Maturity often means people who want a wider circle of more diverse friends will like that singlehood makes that occurrence more natural!

·         Attentiveness

Even in healthy relationships, you still aren’t going to be as attentive toward family and friends. That’s understandable and fine, but it may not be the preference for some mature people! Research shows that being single means you can focus much more on your friendships, creating better bonds overall. That same study indicates that you’ll also be more willing to focus on maintaining those connections.

mature peopleFinal Thoughts On Some Reasons Why Mature People Prefer To Remain Single

Staying single can be the perfect option for many mature individuals! You shouldn’t feel pressured to enter a relationship because that’s the social norm. It’s up to you what you do with your life and what direction you want it to take. If the benefits of being a single appeal to you much more than a relationship could, your preference is perfectly valid!

Woman Hopes to Help Others Beat Insulin Resistance

When you go through a life-changing transformation, you’ll naturally want to inspire others to reach for the stars. After losing 80 pounds in 19 months, one woman from Atlanta, Georgia, wanted to share her secrets to success with others. 26-year-old Julie Black motivates people daily on social media to achieve their weight loss and health goals. She’s had to struggle just like everyone else trying to lose weight, but she rose above her excuses.  An unexpected diagnosis of insulin resistance from her doctor made Julie realize she needed to make a change.

She knew losing weight wouldn’t come easily, but she wanted to take her life back.

The journey toward better health

“I was rapidly gaining weight, and I didn’t understand why. I ended up at 306 pounds, and I went to the doctor and found out that I was actually insulin resistant. My world was turned upside down when I got the news of the insulin resistance because with that diagnosis came a huge lifestyle change.”

Insulin resistance happens when the body’s cells respond abnormally to the hormone insulin. Since the cells can’t process it correctly, your body can’t utilize blood glucose for energy. As a result, your blood sugar goes up. This can eventually lead to type 2 diabetes if left untreated or mismanaged.

A lot of people can’t tell by their symptoms if they have insulin resistance. When Julie went to the doctor, it came as a shock because she had no clue anything was wrong. However, there are a few signs to look out for.

The most common signs of insulin resistance include:

  • A waistline above 40 inches in men and 35 inches in women
  • Blood pressure readings of 130/80 or above
  • A fasting glucose level over 100 mg/dL
  • A fasting triglyceride level over 150 mg/dL
  • HDL cholesterol level under 40 mg/dL in men and 50 mg/dL in women
  • Skin tags
  • Patches of dark, velvety skin

Risk factors/causes for insulin resistance

  • Obesity, particularly fat around the midsection
  • Sedentary lifestyle
  • Eating a diet high in carbohydrates
  • Gestational diabetes
  • Health conditions like nonalcoholic fatty liver disease and polycystic ovary syndrome
  • Hereditary diabetes
  • Smoking
  • Ethnicity — insulin resistance occurs more often in African, Latino, or Native American individuals
  • Being 45 or older
  • Hormonal disorders like Cushing’s syndrome and acromegaly
  • Taking medications like steroids, antipsychotics, and HIV medications
  • Sleep disorders such as sleep apnea

To find out if you’re insulin resistant, your doctor can perform simple blood tests. Lifestyle changes like losing weight, exercising, and eating a balanced diet can help manage this condition. Julie is a perfect example of how changing your habits can ultimately change your life. Now, she hopes to inspire others to take control of their health as well.

 

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“By far, the best thing that has come from this journey has been being able to inspire other women to start their own journey,” she says. “There are so many of us out there who are struggling in silence, and the truth is that we are not alone.”

Julie hopes to inspire others to become the best version of themselves

She began her health journey in September 2019, and at first, it was hard to get accustomed to eating differently. However, she learned to enjoy healthier foods after a while.

“I had to go low carb which was a really big transition for me, but I persevered. I am now down 80 pounds in 19 months. I know that’s longer than most people, but with this condition comes a way tougher time losing weight. So, I’m really proud of myself for how far I’ve come.”

After dieting, the next step was a gym membership

Once she got her diet down, she decided to sign up for a gym membership. After trying out a couple of gyms, she found one that seemed like the perfect fit for her goals.

“I didn’t start working out until about 3 months into the journey. I started off at Orangetheory and then switched over to Burn Boot Camp after about 8 months at Orangetheory because I wanted to get a lot stronger. So, that’s where I’m currently working out. I’m loving it, and it’s been a huge part of my journey.”

Like anyone else, Julie’s story has been full of ups and downs. However, even on the hard days, she kept her goals in mind. Even if she took a small step each day, it was better than doing nothing at all. For Julie, giving in to bad habits just wasn’t an option. Now that she’s made it to the summit, she inspires others to climb that mountain, too.

She actually started her own business called “Say Yes 2 the Fresh.” It’s a weight loss and accountability program that teaches women positive behaviors regarding fitness and nutrition. According to the website, the program can help you “improve your relationship with food, your attitude towards life, and learn to love yourself more fierce than you could ever imagine.”

 

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A reminder for anyone trying to get healthier

“If I had to give anybody advice who is just starting out their journey, I would say choose something that you like doing,” she advises. “Just don’t bite off more than you can chew at the beginning.

Health and consistency look different on everyone, so just make sure that whatever you choose to do is something that you’re enjoying and that you can sustain for a long time. You can do it. If I can do it, you can do it too!”

Final thoughts: Julie lost 80 pounds, now inspires others to overcome insulin resistance

Julie didn’t take any shortcuts with getting healthier; she remained consistent and kept her eyes on the prize. After nineteen long months, she’d lost 80 pounds, going from 305 to 225. Her goal weight is 180 pounds, but she’s made massive progress so far. Julie continues to inspire others every day online and has even made a business from her weight loss success.

If you need some inspiration to lose weight or battle insulin resistance, you can check out Julie’s Instagram here. Remember, you can do anything you set your mind to – all it takes is willpower and dedication!

How to Keep Love Alive Without Being Desperate

Many people compare romantic love to a blazing fire. No matter how powerful the flames, they will dwindle to embers without air and firewood. Likewise, it takes hard work and commitment to keep love alive.

The relationship that’s so powerful today can be nothing in five years from now, which is why you must put some effort into keeping things blazing.

Sixteen Ways To Keep Love Alive for the Long Haul

Are you and your lover sitting in the smoke of a stagnant relationship? It’s never too late to fan the flames and rekindle your devotion. Here are 16 ways to keep your love buzzing for a lifetime.

1. Appreciate Each Other

The downfall to many beautiful relationships is when couples take each other for granted. If you want to keep your love alive, you must show gratitude to your partner every day. When was the last time you told your mate how much they mean to you?

Show them gratitude for the many things they do for you. Thank your partner sincerely, and be specific about why you love them so much. One of the best ways to be grateful is to return the kindness and support them.

keep love alive2. Pay Attention

As a couple, you both deserve to have the other be fully present with each other. It’s essential to hear somebody truly and to be an active listener. When you’re having a conversation, focus on what they’re saying instead of reading the newspaper or browsing social media.

Being present means that you’re listening with an open heart and mind and mirror their emotions. In an article published by Psychology Today, Dr. Karyn Hall explains that validating your partner can support them and make your relationship stronger. Active listening, empathy, and validation are the fuel that keeps love alive.

3. Always be Polite

Familiarity doesn’t have to breed contempt if you respect each other and mind your manners. During the blossoming of your relationship, you tried your best to be courteous and make them feel special. It’s easy to relax your manners after you’ve been together for a while.

However, manners never expire and are essential if you want to keep things alive. Don’t forget the basics of please, thank you, and you’re welcome. Guys, your sweetheart still likes to have the doors opened for her and be treated like a lady.

4. Share Responsibilities

A healthy relationship requires you both to put forth the effort and to share responsibilities equally. In today’s society, both partners usually work outside of the home. Be fair to each other and split up the household chores and other duties.

If one partner is shouldering more than their fair share, it only causes resentment. Have a conversation about dividing the chores to keep your relationship balanced. Some couples find it helpful to post to-do lists, so each partner knows what needs to be done and by when.

5. Make Your Lover Feel Special

There’s never a point in your relationship when your mate doesn’t need to feel special. Offer genuine compliments every day and tell them how beautiful or handsome they are. Keep your love alive and tell them that you still get butterflies in your stomach when you’re together.

6. Keep Dating One Another

Remember how excited you were when you went on your first date together? If you want to fan the flames of your romance, make time together a priority. Designate an evening each week as a date night.

Always plan and make reservations at their favorite restaurant, and be sure to get a sitter for the kids. If you’re going out, wear your best outfit and dine and dance in style. It’s also fun to have the house to yourselves and cuddle on the couch for a good movie and popcorn.

7. Respect Your Differences

As much as you love each other, you’re still individuals with different tastes and opinions. It’s one of the beautiful aspects that make opposites attract. While it’s normal to butt heads occasionally, a dedicated couple respects their differences.

Allow each other the right to express your thoughts and feelings. While you may not share them, you learn to make compromises. You both know to be more flexible and empathetic.

8. Laugh Together to Keep Love Alive

In his article published by Psypost, Eric W. Dolan cites research on humor and relationships from the University of Kansas. Dolan interviewed the head of the study, Dr. Jeffrey Hall. After examining data from 15,177 participants, Hall found promising evidence that couples who appreciate humor tend to have more satisfying relationships.

Not only is it essential to have a good sense of humor, but you keep your love alive by creating laughter together. Share inside jokes, harmless teasing, and sit back and laugh at yourselves. Laughing releases endorphins that ease stress and bring you closer together.

keep love alive9. Be Spontaneous

Nothing puts a damper on a relationship like staying in a rut. You put your relationship on autopilot and never change your restaurants or go anywhere different. Plus, your romance becomes bland, boring, and predictable.

Keep your love alive by keeping your partner guessing. Surprise them with a heartfelt gift that lets them know you’re thinking of them. Visit different restaurants and take a weekend vacation to a new destination. Have them wondering what’s going to happen next.

10. Do Something Fun Together

Speaking of spontaneous, have you ever wanted to learn a new skill or hobby? Why not do it together? Discuss some ideas and decide to do something fun that will enrich both your lives.

Consider learning a foreign language so that you can take that dream vacation. Try a relaxing and enjoyable hobby like art, crafts, or sports. You needn’t become a professional or spend a fortune to have a good time.

11. Don’t Hold Grudges

To have a fulfilling and lasting relationship, you can’t keep score. Resist the urge to preserve every slight and mistake your lover has ever made. Using this list as an arsenal against them can eventually destroy your relationship.

While you can’t forget an offense, your love helps you to forgive. It doesn’t excuse the behavior, but it frees you from bitterness and allows you to go on with life. If you’re the transgressor, apologize sincerely, make amends, and try not to repeat the mistakes.

12. Be a Sanctuary

As a couple, you can offer each other something that nobody else can. You are your lover’s safe place where they can be vulnerable without fear or judgment. Their loving embrace is a virtual shelter where you find peace, encouragement, and solace from the world.

Since you find validation and security in each other’s company, it’s normal to vent your frustrations. However, take care that you don’t take your aggravations out on each other. If you’ve been a little snappy, apologize and find forgiveness in your sacred place.

13. Be a Team

It takes two people to make a relationship work. It becomes unbalanced if you don’t share credit where it’s due. A lasting relationship has no room for big egos and selfish motives.

Just like with any successful team, you have your partners back and be their best cheerleaders. It builds trust and equality that’s essential for a lasting relationship. Teamwork also cultivates trust, mutual respect, and shared ethical behaviors.

14. Spend Some Alone Time

It may sound counterintuitive to keep your love alive by spending some time alone. However, you both need a little break to recharge and reconnect with yourself. Try to devote a part of your day to journaling, meditating, or praying in your own sacred space.

Just because you’re a couple doesn’t mean you’ve lost your individuality. It’s just as vital for you to explore a few of your interests and hobbies. In a trusting relationship, occasional solitude brings you closer together.

15. Be Mindful of Appearances

As an individual, you still deserve to have a fun night with your friends. Have a ladies’ night out, watch a game, or play poker with your buddies. When you and your mate have enough quality time together, you are happy to let each other have some away time.

However, sharing time with old friends doesn’t mean taking a break from your commitments. If you do have friends of the opposite gender, they can be friends with both of you. Never allow yourself to get in a situation that would jeopardize your relationship.

16. Create Traditions

What were some of the beautiful memories you had as a child? Most of these include holidays, special occasions, and being together with your family. You also observed traditions that have been passed down throughout generations.

It’s essential to remember your customs and traditions and share them. Keep your love alive by creating some of your traditions. Not only will it bring you closer together, but you’ll be preserving your customs and pride for your children.

keep love aliveFinal Thoughts on How to Keep Love Alive

The relationship with your sweetheart is a living entity that needs to be cultivated like a garden. By following these and other suggestions, your love can blossom beyond your expectations. It’s a love that you can celebrate now and in the years to come.

4 Things That Drain Your Spiritual Energy And Make You Less Mindful

Your spiritual energy is akin to your soul. It’s the force that keeps you motivated, the fire of passion and strength in your belly, and the power of faith and trust that you have in yourself and the world around you. It’s an essential facet of your overall well-being.

But what happens when you don’t have enough spiritual energy? You begin to lose yourself and become a blank robot, almost like a shell of the person you’re meant to be. And, unfortunately, there are things you could be doing that are actively draining that power! Here are four things that drain your spiritual energy and make you mindless.

1.    Seeking Other People’s Validation

The quickest drain on spiritual energy is an over-reliance on other people. While validation from others is excellent and can feel rewarding, especially when from loved ones, it shouldn’t be the main thing you exist on. If you rely solely on the external rewards of others to keep you going, your spirit will begin to die out. This can leave you without your personality, mind, or soul. Here are some ways you may be seeking the validation of others in this unhealthy way:

spiritual energy·         Trying To Please Everyone

It’s not possible to become the perfect people-pleaser. The more you try to make everyone happy, the less happy everyone will be with you. At the end of the day, you need to listen to your spirit and follow it or risk becoming exhausted and mindless from the effort of pleasing those around you.

·         Not Wanting To Say No

Some people become yes-men who can’t bear the thought of saying “no” to someone because they don’t want to stir up any conflict. Don’t fall into this trap. You have limited energy to expend, and you’ll lose your head quickly if you overcommit to other people. Pick and choose who you spend your time with.

·         Worrying What Other People Think

People are always going to throw their judgments and have their varying perspectives on your life. It’s already tough to think of what’s best for you – adding the additional filter of other people’s perspectives is sure to drain you. The only person whose opinion truly matters when it comes to your personal life is your own.

·         Constantly Helping

There’s nothing wrong with being kind and helpful, and you should be those things. But there comes the point when helping people around you is more negative than positive, as you spend all your time and energy on others and are left with nothing for yourself.

·         Staying In Toxic Relationships

Any relationship can be toxic, not just romantic ones. If there are toxic people in your life and you continue trying to be pleasant to and with them, it’s time to stop and cut them off. Nothing they can give you will be worth the drain on your energy for sticking around.

·         Trying To Meet Societal Norms

The rules of society follow the majority and aren’t worth the validation. What that majority cares about may not be what you care about, so don’t feel pressured to meet those norms if you don’t want to. Your spiritual energy is better spent focusing on doing what you want, no matter what society says.

·         Maintaining A Low Self-Esteem

A lack of positive self-esteem lends itself to envy, attention-seeking, and other behaviors that rely on others to boost your mood. It can be exhausting, and not being fulfilled with yourself is a surefire way to drain energy. Of course, improving self-esteem is difficult, but if you know you have trouble with insecurity and similar problems, it’s time to focus your efforts on improving those aspects of yourself.

2.    Negative Thinking

Negativity and negative thinking are a drain on you and those around you. When you focus too much on evil thoughts and make them central to your mind and being, you’re becoming a part of the problem. Your spiritual energy will die away without positive thinking, leaving you confused, lost, angry, and mindless. Here are some forms of negative thinking to avoid:

·         Overthinking

It’s easy to overthink when you’re anxious, have big or difficult decisions to make, or are aware that outcomes to your choices aren’t obvious. While considering different avenues is crucial to wise decision-making, there’s only so much you can ruminate on something before you’ve exhausted productive thought and all your energy. Learn to take a leap of faith and trust your instincts – or your capability to sort things out if you made the wrong choice.

·         Worrying All The Time

A little worry is normal and natural. Too much of it, and it becomes unproductive. Some things are out of your hands, and worrying about them will no longer be of any use. Instead of worrying, focus on learning from past events and on what you can control now. Your spiritual energy is better spent in this way.

·         Constant Complaining

Complaining as a method of expressing negative emotion isn’t necessarily a bad thing. But if you find problems and things to bemoan in every aspect of your life, then you’re just keeping yourself in a negative headspace and losing your spiritual energy in the process. Instead of complaining, ask yourself what can be done about the situation you’re in, then work on that solution.

·         Taking Everything Personally

Not everything that happens in life is out to get you. People have bad days and take it out on others randomly. Bad things happen in the universe, and sometimes your luck isn’t great. Lots of things have nothing to do with you, so why waste your energy focusing on wondering where you went wrong or what you’ve done to “deserve” misfortune?

overthinking quotes3.    Being Disorganized

Some people enjoy having a little clutter in their lives. But a full-blown lack of any positive organization can mess with your spiritual energy and leave you with none leftover to think or perform daily tasks. You can lose positive thinking, gain lethargy, and feel overwhelmed thanks to disorganized living. Here are some signs that your disorganization is getting dangerous for your energy:

·         Your Tasks Aren’t Well-Managed

If you have many things to do and many small daily tasks to juggle, you need to stay organized enough to manage them, their deadlines, and their descriptions. A lack of organization can add a lot of effort and time to what would typically be quicker jobs. Finding organizational methods for your task list can help you accomplish each goal without too much spiritual drain.

·         Your Workspace Is Messy

Some people work well with a bit of mess. But for the most part, the human brain doesn’t do well in cluttered environments. Your eyes will naturally latch onto mess, distracting you from your daily tasks. Finding ways to add a semblance of order to your workspace can be tiring at first, but it will preserve your spiritual energy in the long run.

·         You Tend To Multitask

People often pride themselves on their ability to multitask. However, the reality is that doing so is usually pretty bad for overall productivity. When you multitask, you’re not doing many things at the same time. What you’re doing is swapping between multiple different tasks, which uses up your energy as you try to switch jobs and re-focus every few minutes. It’s best to do things one at a time, then take breaks between each task.

·         You Can Never Find Anything

Organized chaos can be a valid form of living. But if it takes you ages to find things that you have lying around, the chances are that it’s time to improve your organizational system. Use drawers, folders, boxes, labels, and other organization tools to ensure that you can find things quickly, wherever they may be. Spending a lot of time trying to find the things you need can be tiring. Plus, you will waste too much time.

4.    Eating or Drinking Poorly

It’s surprising to think that your spiritual energy can be affected by what you eat or drink, but it makes sense. Your body needs fuel to function, and your energy levels depend on that, too. When you fail to eat and drink properly, you’re depriving your organs, including your brain and mind, of the nutrients they need to function productively. Here are some ways you could be eating or drinking so poorly that it’s making you mindless:

·         Drinking Too Much Caffeine

A lot of people rely on a cup of Joe to start the day with freshness. One cup in the morning is typically fine, but problems begin to arise when you start drinking too much caffeine too late in the day. Research has found that drinking coffee after 2 in the afternoon can affect your sleep cycle, which in turn drains your energy and positive thinking.

·         Skipping Breakfast

Sadly, a lot of young people skip breakfast to hurry along to their jobs. But your body needs breakfast to get itself started and energize itself, especially as it is still trying to run on whatever you had for dinner. You’ll feel sluggish and foggy if you don’t get some nutrients in your body before you kickstart the day, and your energy levels will suffer for it.

·         Not Drinking Sufficient Water

Even a tiny little bit of dehydration can sap away your energy, reducing any positive efforts you may be taking in your everyday life. The average American fails to drink their recommended eight glasses a day, with most winding up with just 50% of that needed amount. When you’re dehydrated, your blood becomes thicker, and your organs start functioning at sub-optimal levels. This is enough to drain your energy and put you in a brain fog.

·         Eating Too Much Junk Food

We all know that junk food is bad for your physical health, but did you know it’s also bad for your spiritual energy? Junk food contains trans fats, sugars, and refined carbohydrates that spike your blood sugar dramatically, causing you to feel more tired. If you’re hungry, try to go for whole grains, proteins, fibers, and healthy fats, and limit your intake of junk food treats.

spiritual energyFinal Thoughts On Some Things That Drain Your Spiritual Energy And Make You Mindless

Spiritual energy is an essential resource. In fact, it is one you must guard closely to maintain your sense of self, personal drive, and mindfulness. Try to avoid performing habits that drain it, especially if those habits have other adverse effects on your wellbeing!

5 Ways Making Assumptions Can Harm Self-Esteem + How to Prevent It

An assumption is a statement consisting of a belief or concept that is accepted to be the truth, even though there is no actual evidence that indicates its reality. It means coming up with explanations for things without any real reason to believe in those explanations.

To some degree, assumptions can be harmless. But repeatedly making these assumptions time and time again is awful for your mental health. When you’re constantly assuming, you’re not grounded in reality, and your ideas of the world around you are very much obscured and clouded by falsehood.

Your mental health can be affected by the assumptions that you make. One of the commonly affected aspects is self-esteem, which refers to a personal view of your value and capabilities. It seems that the more assumptions you make, the more likely your self-esteem is to crumble.

But why does that happen? Can it be helped? Is it possible to fight off a habit of making assumptions, especially if you have an anxiety-based disorder? And, honestly, how does self-esteem even factor into this? To explain this topic, here are five ways making assumptions can hurt your self-esteem.

1.    Assumptions Lead To Stress

making assumptionsWhen you make assumptions, you’re opening yourself up to undue stress. You’re coming up with all sorts of ideas for why something may go wrong or how someone might have an issue with you, but you don’t know if any of that is true. Worse still, this will affect your self-esteem! For example, consider:

  • Your boss asks you to come in for a chat. You immediately begin making assumptions that you’re going to be fired, and you wonder where you went wrong and how you’ll recover from this financial blow. But it turns out that your boss just wanted to ask about upcoming reports, and you’re not being fired at all.
  • Your friend has been acting a little distant lately. You make an assumption that you have done something to upset them and that they hate you now, and you wonder if you’re an awful person or an unworthy friend. But it turns out that they were going through a personal issue and weren’t feeling up to interaction.
  • Your partner has been on their phone a lot and hid their screen from you the last time you came to look at what they were doing. You jump to an assumption that they’re cheating, and you start snooping to find evidence. In the process, you feel terrible and wonder if you’re unworthy or not attractive enough to hold your attention. But it turns out that your partner was gift shopping for you on their phone and didn’t want you to see to ruin the surprise.

Your assumptions are entirely wrong in all these situations, easily avoidable with communication, and packed with stressful energy. All that stress will deplete your positive thinking and self-esteem over time, and studies have found that these factors are all closely linked. Why put yourself through that kind of panic?

2.    Assumptions Make Things Harder For You – For No Reason

A lot of your self-esteem comes from your confidence in your capabilities and strengths – and you don’t exactly keep them going well when you make assumptions. This is because beliefs take away from your abilities and increase your risks of failure, which can damage your self-esteem when you have to take blow after blow. Ideally, you’d learn from your mistakes each time, but with assumptions in the mix, that can be hard to do. Here is how assumptions may make things harder for you:

·         You Miss Opportunities

Assumptions can make you underestimate yourself or gain incorrect impressions of others. Combined, this can cause you to miss out on a significant number of opportunities. You don’t apply for jobs because you assume you won’t get them. Or perhaps you don’t connect with someone because you assume they aren’t interested in you. You can miss out on so much when you keep assuming things, and it’s not worth the mistake!

·         You Make Hurdles

When you assume certain things are problems and don’t take the time actually to check if they are, you wind up trying to circumvent or protect yourself from imagined hurdles that aren’t even there. Even if there are challenges ahead, making assumptions means you have a fair chance of guessing incorrectly about what those challenges will be. And of course, there is always the chance that there won’t be any hurdles – so why invent them?

·         You Box Your Creativity In

Assuming that there’s only one way to do something means you never get to think outside of the box. And when that one tried, and the proper method goes down for whatever reason, you’re stuck and confused, unsure how to make things work. To limit your creativity is to determine the options that you have and make things harder for yourself.

3.    Assumptions Can Set You Up For Rude Awakenings

Most people’s assumptions indeed have to do with negative beliefs, but sometimes assumptions can be made about good things instead. You can become overconfident and have a dangerous level of positive thinking when you assume everything is going exactly your way. As that old saying goes, you shouldn’t be counting your chickens before they hatch!

Overconfidence doesn’t seem like the worst trait, but all pride will lead to a downfall eventually. There will come the point where you will meet with a reality that shattered your overconfidence and your expectations, sending your self-esteem plummeting down a dark hole.

Worse still, assumptions that lead to overconfidence are typically cycles that are difficult to break out of, leading to even more assumptions. You’ll have an entire stack of them piled up before you get your rude awakening, which is even worse for your self-esteem. This is because:

  • You feel overconfident due to an overflow of toxic positivity, which has caused you to make assumptions on that high.
  • Being overconfident makes you begin to take things for granted, which damages your life and your chances and opportunities as you make more mistakes and miss crucial details.
  • In your overconfidence that is naturally more careless, you are also less likely to note any signs that something terrible will happen.

assumptions4.    Assumptions Are “Lazy.”

Laziness as a concept doesn’t mean what people think it means. Many people define it as an unavoidable trait, saying that someone lazy is irredeemable and can’t ever do work or tasks efficiently.

But in reality, laziness doesn’t exist in that manner. According to studies, it’s a cover for other underlying issues, and a lot of these issues stem from poor self-esteem. By continuing to make assumptions out of so-called laziness, you are perpetuating your poor self-esteem and even fostering it, as if you’re encouraging yourself to feel worse!

Here are some ways that assumptions are “lazy” – or, more specifically, a product of poor self-esteem:

·         Assumptions Are An Easy Out

When you make assumptions, you meet no resistance and carry along on your way without learning, growing, or asking. This means you don’t get the chance to improve yourself, which can further damage your self-esteem when you don’t see your life’s trajectory moving.

·         Assumptions Stop The Gathering Of Knowledge

The act of learning means getting up, cleaning the air, and asking questions. Jumping to conclusions is an easy action that doesn’t give you any of the information that you genuinely need in life. It’s lazy, and it’s no good for your mental health.

·         Assumptions Make You Ignore Responsibility

When you make assumptions, you’re choosing to put up a fake version of reality and hide behind it. In real life, you’d have to get off your behind and take ownership of the life you’re living and the things you’ve done. Hiding behind the act of blaming others is “lazy” behavior rooted in self-esteem problems, and when you lean into them, you send the spiral down further.

5.    Assumptions Make You More Negative

To have positive self-esteem, you also need to have a lot of positive thinking. Optimism is one of the critical factors of good self-esteem because it teaches you to find good things about yourself and love yourself more than before.

Unfortunately, the act of making assumptions can damage these kinds of efforts. You become a more negative person when you make assumptions, and you develop a negative mindset that focuses on worst-case scenarios and unfounded beliefs about what will happen next. This is terrible for your self-esteem! Here are some reasons that assumptions make you more negative:

·         Assumptions Are Toxic

Assumptions are the opposite of open communication and the opposite of self-improvement drives. It’s draining to assume the worst of everyone constantly. Besides, it’s tiring for others to be around someone who’s always assuming things about them. You’ll push many people away because of your assumptions, and being alone is always a blow to self-esteem.

·         Assumptions Trap You In The Past

Many assumptions are born out of adverse circumstances from one’s past. When you use those experiences to fuel your expectations and assumptions, you’re essentially imprisoning yourself with these ways of thinking. You can’t move on from things that hurt you, nor can you heal self-esteem damaged by that if you make assumptions.

·         Assumptions Are A Cycle of Negativity

As previously mentioned, assumptions often manifest in a cycle. They become a bad habit that is hard to break out of, especially if making assumptions has paid off for you in the past.

making assumptionsFinal Thoughts On Some Ways Making Assumptions Can Hurt Your Self-Esteem, And How To Prevent It

While assumptions may occasionally be valid, most of the time, they aren’t. And if that’s the case, then why would you want to spend any time making them? They harm your self-esteem, relationships, stress levels, and opportunities, after all.

Naturally, it’s not as easy as it sounds to break free from assumptions. Learning to face the root cause of why you make assumptions can be helpful in overall recovery. Don’t be afraid to speak to a mental health professional, such as a counselor or therapist, about this if needed. It will take time for you to unlearn the habit of assumption-making. But your self-esteem will thank you when those quirks are no longer present!

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