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8 Ways to Rebuild a Positive Life After Trauma

January 22, 2015 by Power of Positivity

The word ‘trauma’ is a derivative of the Greek word for ‘wound.’ This term, of course, encompasses physical, psychological, and emotional ordeals. One commonality between all types of trauma is that it interferes with the daily functioning of a person’s life, sometimes to a severe degree.

“Trauma is the glimpse of truth that tells us a lie, the lie that love is impossible, that peace is an illusion.” – David Morris, author

From nearly the beginning of the 21^st century, people have had to deal with conflict increasingly. Without a doubt, the individuals that have suffered the most have been the men, women, and children placed in harm’s way. In addition to the obvious physical damage caused by war, there is a high psychological cost.

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a form of psychological trauma that is most commonly associated with war or violence. While this may have brought the condition to the surface, there are various reasons why someone develops PTSD. The condition usually results because the person saw or lived through a dangerous event.

The most common adult symptoms of PTSD include flashbacks, nightmares, frightening thoughts, emotional numbness, depression, difficulty sleeping, angry outbursts, and hypertension.

For children who experience PTSD, symptoms may include: bedwetting, re-acting the event, being clingy with a parent or adult, and loss of verbal skill. Teens often experience symptoms closer to those of adults. Regardless of age, symptoms can be reduced.

PTSD is one obvious form of trauma, but there are many others. Some other situations and events that can lead to trauma include:

– Acts of violence – ex: assault, child abuse, domestic abuse, rape and suicide

– Disasters – ex: earthquake, hurricane, flood, etc.

– Serious vehicle accidents

Regardless of the type of trauma experienced, there are ways to cope. You can build a positive life after trauma…any trauma.

Here are 8 ways to build a positive life after a traumatic event.

1. Remember that your past does not define you.

When someone experiences trauma, they become haunted by the event for a long time. Given the nature of what trauma sufferers have seen and experienced, this is understandable. Acts of violence, disaster, and war are absolutely abhorrent events for someone to live through.

Remember this: your past does not define who you are. The brain is very adept at replaying events that strongly impacted your life – this includes trauma. This cannot be stated enough and is a recurring phrase on this site: be present. Study meditation, prayer, spirituality…whatever you need to do to keep your mind focused on the present. You can do it.

2. Forgive yourself and others for past hurt and resentment

This is understandably difficult, especially those that have experienced acts of violence. Just remember that you don’t have to forgive someone because they deserve it, …but because you deserve it. Forgiveness can liberate you from the resentment and anger occupying your heart and mind, allowing you to replace it with something far better.

Again, forgiving others is not about them; it’s about you. Holding onto anger and resentment damages you far more than it does who committed the act. Release and let go of this negativity, my friend.

3. Take time for self-love and self-care

Of course, be good to yourself by taking care of your body and mind. Do things that cater to your physical and mental health – exercise, meditate, eat healthily, etc.

People who experience PTSD, including soldiers in combat, have experimented with mindfulness meditation and found it to be beneficial. According to Dr. Elizabeth Stanley, a professor at Georgetown University, and former U.S. Army Captain, “It’s clear that mindfulness can lower stress in many contexts. We (also) think it can work for soldiers dealing with the extreme stress of combat.”

Please see the article about making self-care a top priority. You will find many additional good tips.

4. Replace negative thought patterns with new and healing beliefs

This is another area where meditation may help in dealing with trauma. Negative thought replacement is an actual method designed to reduce the amount of depressive and negative thoughts.

It’s normal not to believe new, introductory thoughts at first; however, making a habit of introducing new thought patterns works it one keeps at it. According to a study in Psychology Today, speaking positive thoughts aloud creates two forms of memory replacement.

The practice is relatively simple – whatever negative thought comes to mind, think, or say the exact opposite. Positive words and thoughts breed positive words and thoughts. It may take some patience and work, but replacing the negative thoughts will have a profound impact in the long-run.

5. Take small steps to make subtle shifts

“The journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step.” – Lao Tzu

What a beautiful quote, one that is directly applicable to those affected by trauma. This may be one to commit to memory.

Again, in dealing with trauma, healing will not happen quickly. You must remember to be patient and gentle with yourself while allowing the process to unfold. It is important not to be harsh with yourself. Indeed, you’ve already experienced enough.

6. Learn to trust life again (trust people, new experiences)

Traumatic events can make it extremely difficult to trust life itself – the process, the experiences, and the people.

This is certainly true if a person has hurt you, which makes it more difficult to trust people as a whole. But you must move past this barrier.

You must have faith and trust in people and in life. Think about the repercussions of living a life in which no trust is given. You are resentful, angry, and discouraged. Instead, trust in people, trust in yourself, and trust in life. Reframe your mind.

7. Keep a close positive circle (people who uplift you and encourage your healing and new life)

Being surrounded by positive people is important for everyone, but especially those who have experienced traumatic events. If you’ve experienced trauma, make a commitment to be around people who will encourage your healing process and not judge you.

Refuse to be surrounded by those who will make your transition more difficult. Negative people breed negative people. When people of a negative disposition present themselves, walk away, or ignore them. There are plenty of good, positive people that will assist and encourage your healing process.

8. Acceptance of personal tragedy is liberating – Suffering should be expected as a part of life experience. This is when we learn the most.

As with most experiences, you can learn and grow from what has happened to you. Even though it may not resonate now, what you’ve gone through has made you stronger, not weaker. Sure, you may feel weak and even hopeless at times, but there are an inner strength and courage far beyond what you can imagine.

The strongest steel is forged from the strongest fire. Remember this as your battle rages, and trust that the final outcome will be one worthy of the highest praise.

7 Tips to Raise Your Vibration

January 22, 2015 by Power of Positivity

Did you know that you can influence your energy, and therefore your reality, based on your thoughts, actions, and feelings? The more in tune you become with yourself, the better your connection will become to the entire universe. Ongoing scientific studies have proven that your existence extends beyond just your physical body; you have an “energy body” that others can feel and respond to. The events, people, and places you encounter in life directly represent your current vibration levels.

If you want to begin to raise your vibration, consider the following tips:

Feed your body nourishing foods.

If you fill your body with highly processed, chemically enhanced, unhealthy foods, your energy body will have a very low frequency vibration. This simply means that your connection to yourself and the divine will become blocked by these toxic foods. If you want to feel light and vibrant, try eating mostly raw fruits and vegetables; these foods have an abundance of nutrients that go directly to your cells, allowing you to connect more deeply to yourself and the world around you.

Quiet your mind.

Our thoughts govern almost all aspects of our lives because these thoughts directly influence the reality you experience. However, if you let your mind run on autopilot, you won’t even realize your predominant thought patterns that subconsciously create your reality every single day. In order to gain control of your life, you have to learn to take charge of your mind.

Meditation greatly helps with this, but you don’t have to set aside time each day to silence your mind. You can do this throughout the day, in your car, office, at the gym, or even the grocery store. Anytime you catch your thoughts running wild, just take a few deep breaths and tell your brain to slow down. Master your mind, and you will begin to master your life.

Walk outside barefoot.

Try to spend a little time outside each day with no shoes on – you will absorb Earth’s healing energies, which will, therefore, permeate your cells and fill them with life. We have become very detached from the natural order of things in modern society, and many people crave more time in nature as a result of this. Luckily, you can easily incorporate the great outdoors into your life by removing the barrier between you and the Earth.

Take off your shoes, get a little dirt on your feet, and let the Earth transform your DNA. This practice, called earthing, will help strengthen your root chakra, which represents safety and stability. Become one with the Earth, and you will feel more grounded and secure in your daily life.

Start your day with positive affirmations.

If you have a negative mindset, your aura will become dimmed, and your outer experiences will start to reflect your inner state. When you flood your mind with positive thoughts and images, your reality will become a lot brighter, and you will probably start to attract uplifting things and people.

Begin your day with something like “I am a beautiful being of light, and I am powerful beyond measure.” You can even write these positive affirmations on sticky notes and place them on your mirror or desk so that you can read them every morning and start each day on the right note. Positive thoughts alter your brain chemistry, therefore changing your perception, which determines your reality.

Get excited about life!

As you increase your vibrational frequency, your atoms begin to move more rapidly, and life around you starts to respond to your new energy. Think about the speed of light; it travels at 186,000 miles per second. In just the same way, your own cells will begin to travel at a faster speed when you become excited about your life! If nothing in your life excites you, your energy will start to become dull and heavy.

However, if you start to live life authentically and honor your highest calling as a spiritual being, you will start to buzz with enthusiasm and a newfound appreciation for life. Love your life, and it will start to love you back!

Smile every chance you get.

Anything positive that you do will affect your energy in a positive way. Most people don’t smile enough these days, even though smiling uses fewer facial muscles than frowning! Smile at strangers, at your parents, at your dog, at the flowers growing near your door, or even at yourself. Even if you don’t feel particularly happy at the time, just the sheer act of smiling will raise your vibration.

Smile, laugh and enjoy your life as much as possible. See beyond the veil and realize that you have infinite potential as a light being, and don’t take life so seriously. You came here to be victorious, not to let life beat you down. Smile more often, and life will give you even more things to smile about.

Give more, take less.

Life presents copious opportunities for us to give, in the form of possessions, food, words, or even hugs, to name a few. As the famous saying goes, “Give, and you shall receive.” You could volunteer at the local homeless shelter or animal sanctuary, or even just write uplifting letters and pass them out to strangers. Anything you do from the heart will have a huge impact on those around you, and may even inspire those people to give as well. Giving to others will also make you feel better because you will improve someone’s day or even their life.

You may find that you don’t desire as many material items these days, so give them away to someone in need. When you give, you increase the compassion on this planet, which will help transform you into the divine being you were meant to be!

Join the discussion in the comments or on Facebook. What practices can you share to help the community raise their overall vibration?

5 Daily Disciplines that Reprogram Your Mind to Stay Positive

January 22, 2015 by Chris Butler

Did you know there are simple ways to override default negative thoughts, essentially hypnotizing your mind to think positively?

There is no getting around the fact that negativity is all around us, which significantly impacts our minds. The brain is innately programmed with a “negativity bias” – the tendency for your brain to be more sensitive to unpleasant stimuli.

Scientists believe the tendency to react more strongly to negative input had a good reason – our distant ancestors had to deal with danger constantly; thus, their survival relied on being able to detect and avoid dangerous situations. In short, the bias has evolutionary roots.

Then, there is the incomprehensible complexity of the human mind, with approximately 100 trillion neural connections. This unfathomable number of synapses explains our complex way of thinking. It also explains why we have negative thoughts that replay themselves repeatedly without us understanding why.

The good news is that you can control what your mind produces. While you may never be able to rid your brain of negative thoughts completely, you can drastically reduce them. With patience and the willingness to discipline yourself, you can reprogram your mind to stay positive.

Here are 5 daily disciplines that will help you reprogram your mind to positive…

1. Keep a gratitude journal

Research has shown that practicing gratitude regularly makes your brain healthier and happier. Some benefits of being grateful include more motivation, better sleep, and a better mood throughout the day.

One gratitude study involved assigning a group of young adults to keep a daily journal of things they were grateful for. The other group was instructed to keep a daily journal of things that annoyed them or why they were better off than others. The group that kept the gratitude journal demonstrated greater increases in attention, determination, energy and enthusiasm.

This study demonstrated three important takeaways: (1) gratitude has great psychological benefits, (2) thinking that you are “better off” than another person is not gratitude, and (3) true appreciation is an important aspect of being grateful.

Gratitude is not a comparative practice. It is honing in on the positive aspects of your life that make you more appreciative.

2. Repeat positive affirmations

In numerous studies, positive affirmations have been shown to change how the brain is wired effectively. This rewiring changes how the brain filters incoming stimuli, effectively resulting in a more positive mood.

Dr. Mona Lisa Schultz, a neuroscientist and author of various books on the subject of affirmations and the brain explains:

“We can rewire the patterns in our brain with cognitive behavior therapy or affirmations. Affirmations change the way our brains are wired and the brain lights up differently. So it’s not just this flow, woo-woo stuff…(affirmations) have a bio-chemical, neuro-chemical, and neuropharmacological affects just as effective, if not more effective, than Prozac, Zoloft, or whatever else you have.”

Here’s a quick 4-step method to create positive affirmations:

– Take some time to think about areas of your life you’d like to improve or how you’d like your life to be.

– Write down a list of the most important improvements you’d like to make.

– Write down a few positive statements for each item on your list. Jot them down in the present tense, and focus on what you want, not what you don’t.

– Post these affirmations around your home and read them frequently.

3. Associate and surround yourself with supportive people

Positive people have a positive effect on your thinking. Embrace the company of individuals who display a positive mindset. Doing so will inspire, empower, and motivate you to be your best.

As mentioned earlier, the brain has a default setting that remembers and holds onto negative events. Negative people are no different. They will alter your way of thinking, and you will, consciously or unconsciously, begin to mirror their behaviors, words, and thoughts. This makes it all the more important to mind the company that you keep.

Refuse the company of negative people by keeping in mind your end goal – developing habits that allow your brain to stay positive. Your mindset is more important than accommodating people that negatively affect your brain and slow your progress.

4. Ignore negative thoughts

Remember this: you are not your negative thoughts, period. Our negativity bias makes it probable that negative thoughts will surface throughout the day.

Negative thinking is simply tabloid material for the mind. There is no substance to tabloid material…it’s designed to attract the curious shopper into paying for useless and intellectually dishonest information. Publishers of tabloids rely on the impulses and misguided curiosity of people who see them.

The brain is the same way. It may be clever to present the information, but in the end, it’s void of anything representing the facts. The facts are these: you are a person dedicated to improvement, you are positive in your outlook, and you innately know that you are a positive person.

When negative thoughts present themselves, don’t acknowledge them. Don’t wage a thought war by attempting to rationalize with them. You observe them, sure, that’s natural. Observation doesn’t indicate acknowledgment.

When you don’t engage negative thoughts, they fade away; in the same way, the desire to buy that tabloid magazine diminishes when you leave the store…and you’re better off.

5. Stay active

Idleness gives ample time for the brain to overanalyze and overthink. The easiest solution is recognizing when your brain is taking you down this road and diverting the course.

There are many ways to become active, but exercise is the best (by far). Exercise releases endorphins, the hormones that are responsible for feelings of euphoria. It’s a natural antidepressant that far exceeds the capabilities of any prescription drug. Its positive effects are also long-lasting, remaining with you throughout the day.

Other benefits of exercise on the brain include:

– Oxygenizes the brain, improving its function

– Releases a plethora of hormones, aiding and providing nourishment for brain cells

– Stimulates brain plasticity by stimulating the growth in critical areas of the brain

– Improves learning and memory

– Reduces the risk of brain-related illnesses such as Alzheimer’s and dementia

5 Ways to Make Happiness a Habit

January 22, 2015 by Power of Positivity

In today’s society, happiness can seem like some elusive state of mind that only certain people can attain. However, anyone can cultivate a happy attitude, and keep it for the rest of their life. Happiness starts from within, no matter your current circumstances.

Happiness simply means finding joy in this very moment, regardless of what you have or what you’re doing. Everybody possesses the capability to choose happiness because every attitude we have is a choice.

“Happiness held is the seed; happiness shared is the flower.” – Author Unknown

Make happiness a habit with these 5 tips:

1. Be happy with who you are.

Not surprisingly, the current state of the world reflects the collective consciousness, which means the planet needs a good dose of happiness to turn things around. That transformation begins with you because when you become happy within, that energy ripples out far beyond your physical body, affecting the entire universe. No matter where you live, what job you have, or how much money you make, choose to feel happy with who you are on the inside.

But how do you become happy with yourself? Simple – just choose happiness in any given moment. See yourself as the perfect, limitless being that you are, and let your true nature shine through. When you start to love yourself and reveal your unique, raw essence to the world, you encourage others to do the same. Remember, happiness is contagious, so spread it as much as you can!

2. Ask someone what made them happy today.

At the checkout counter at the grocery store, or while you wait in line at the bank, strike up positive conversations with strangers. Invite them to engage in an encouraging conversation that will make them think about what made them happy that day. Not only will this help them forget about anything negative they may have encountered, but it will make them realize how much better they feel focusing on the positive aspects of their life. Make happiness a part of your daily conversations, and it will naturally become a habit after a while!

3. Find an exercise regimen you love.

Whether you enjoy yoga, running, biking, swimming, or hiking, just find something you genuinely love to do that doesn’t even feel like exercise. Cultivate a regular routine so you don’t get sidetracked or discouraged, and maybe find some friends who enjoy similar activities and can tag along with you. Whatever you do, just choose to get active often. Exercise releases endorphins, which will give you a natural high, promoting feelings of well-being and vitality. It also makes you more confident, which will help increase your overall happiness.

4. Get uncomfortable often.

Unhappiness often arises when people give into normalcy and mundane routines, not allowing themselves to get out of their comfort zone. If you want an adrenaline rush, try something new. Go base jumping, skydiving, rock climbing, or sing karaoke in front of a crowd. Conquer your fears, and you will conquer yourself. Plus, you will get to know a whole new side of yourself, and gain confidence from your accomplishments.

Make trying new things a habit, and you will soon find that your life feels more exciting and unpredictable again. It can be easy to get stuck in a rut and hide under the familiar blankets of security, but as they say, “variety is the spice of life.” You can choose what kind of life you live, so choose one that makes you come alive, not one where you feel under-stimulated and unhappy.

5. Think happy thoughts.

A happy life and happy thoughts go hand in hand; you can’t have one without the other. Negative thoughts will inevitably enter your brain from time to time, but you don’t have to give into them. Just observe them, let them pass, and reinforce happy thoughts. Even in highly stressful and undesirable situations, you can still choose to look at the bright side of things. For example, if you get into a car accident where your car is totaled, but you and the other driver come out with just a few minor scratches, keep your attention tuned to the fact that you made it out alive.

You can avoid a lot of unnecessary inner turmoil by staying focused on the positive aspects of life, and avoiding any drama that you might create for yourself and others. Life becomes a lot simpler when we simplify our thoughts and realize that we must strive to maintain happiness if we want to thrive during our time on Earth.

What do you to to keep a happy heart? Join us on Facebook and tell us! We would love to hear.

10 Ways to Show Gratitude in a Relationship

January 21, 2015 by Power of Positivity

If you’ve been in a long-term relationship or marriage, or are aiming to attain one, you come to understand that the initial infatuation and lust period eventually fades a bit. This is normal human behavior. After all, the person who would eventually become your significant other was completely new to you – a novel, attractive, interesting person. Of course, they still personify these characteristics…it’s just not as fresh in your mind. Showing gratitude can renew that spark.

As our relationship grows, so does our love for one another. Unfortunately, so does complacency. We just sort of expect the other person to be there, which can affect our thoughts and behaviors. Among the behaviors affected is our gratitude for the man or woman that we love.

Despite the tendency to take one another for granted, we should do the exact opposite. In fact, research shows that displays of gratitude make your partner more attached, pleased, and satisfied.

The benefits do not end with the recipient of the admiration, however. The person that gives any type of gratitude will not only feel more appreciated but satisfied with their good deed. This is because a display of gratitude initiates a physical, emotional and mental connection between two lovers – no matter how long the relationship!

Simply put: acts of gratitude elevates relationships. Expressions of appreciation are, in essence, expressions of love and thoughtfulness. Relationships are strengthened and empowered when the one you love makes a conscious decision to show you how much they truly care. Further, acts of gratitude continually renew the feelings that brought two people together in the first place.

Here are 10 ways that you can show gratitude to that special someone…

1 – Say “Thank You”.

It’s easy to forget how powerful a simple “Thank You” is. There is no need to wait until a birthday, anniversary, or Valentine’s Day to demonstrate how thankful you are to have them in your life.

Giving thanks to your partner is one of the best ways to demonstrate gratitude. Thank him or her for a prepared meal, spontaneous kiss, doing the laundry, or something else. Aside from saying it, you can leave a quick note on their nightstand, give them a card, or do something around the house that shows your thankfulness.

2 – Appreciate them for their efforts.

If your partner works extra hours, cooks dinner, brings home groceries, or otherwise demonstrates their effort in providing for you, make sure to thank them for their time spent taking care of things. Even if they happen to mess something up while trying, still shower them with love and appreciation to demonstrate your gratitude for their efforts.

3 – Use some creativity to express gratitude.

Saying “Thank You” is nice, but if you are constantly saying the same words to express appreciation it can lose its well-intended meaning after a time. Use phrases such as “I appreciate when you…”, “I love it when you…”, “I am thankful for…”, “I am grateful for…” or some other similar phrase. You’ll find that your partner is a little more receptive and appreciative when you mix it up a bit.

4 – Praise them, both privately and publicly.

Giving praise to your partner is wonderful in private, but it’s also perfect in front of other people. Even if your partner is a bit shy, they will appreciate the fact that you’ve made a bold statement about them while among the company of others.

Your loved one wants to feel that you are proud of them when it’s just you together and when you have other people around. It’s bold, it’s confident, and it’s incredibly attractive…especially when you are a man praising your woman… don’t you agree, ladies?

5 – Flowers…or chocolate (for men!)

Admittedly, flowers can be a bit cliché but that doesn’t mean they’re not appreciated. Women really do like flowers, even if it’s just a tangible expression of thoughtfulness. To make this a little more special, give her flowers when there is no reason other than showing your love. An outward display of gratitude via a flower arrangement is great when it’s spontaneous.

Of course, if your Goddess isn’t a fan of flowers, buy her something that nearly every other woman on the face of this planet adores…chocolate. Buy them in a heart-shaped box for an added effect. A chocolate bar is not really desirable in this case…or maybe it is. How about chocolate “kisses”? That kind of makes sense…okay, we’re done.

6 – Pay attention to the little things

Try to pick up on subtle hints that indicate wishful action on your part. Maybe it’s a softly spoken word about having the dishes put away, the garage cleaned, the laundry folded, or the car washed. Perhaps it’s a date night for two out of town, or maybe something that would add to their wardrobe. Whatever it is, pick up the cue and take some action. This is an incredibly powerful form of gratitude. Attention to detail!

7 – Disrupt the established routine

If you’re a woman, does your man usually take the garbage out? If you’re a man, does your woman usually go grocery shopping? These are clearly established roles where a bit of switcheroo can get the gratitude flowing to (and from) your partner… not to mention how great you’ll feel afterward.

Sure, these may seem like tedious chores to take on, but imagine the look of surprise and genuine appreciation on your partners face when they realize you’ve done something you hate!

(The author of this article is a married man and can testify how much he adores seeing his bewildered, loving wife react in surprise to him doing the laundry or making breakfast).

8 – Show gratitude when you succeed

If you’re a woman who received a promotion, state how you couldn’t have done it without your man’s support. If you’re a man who received a promotion, state how you couldn’t have done it without your woman’s support. Get the idea here?

The truth is it doesn’t matter what the success is; it is a shared success if you’re in a committed relationship. You support one another, you have different responsibilities, and each of your efforts makes it possible for the person you love to make strides in their life.

9 – Be there when they need help

Circumstances arise when the other partner’s normal “routine” is interrupted – sickness, work, family issues, etc. A truly grateful partner will combat anything that stands in their way of being there and assuming whatever responsibilities are necessary. Do the chores, help with the kids, clean the house, give a massage…do whatever is needed until your partner is able to get back in the saddle.

10 – Consistency is key

Most of us are capable of showing gratitude from time to time. The real value lies in being able to display your gratefulness on a consistent basis. Know this: he or she loves you with their entire being. The willingness to show your appreciation for them is well worth the effort. In fact, you’ll likely see some form of gratitude coming right back at you.

How do you show your significant other how much you appreciate them? Share your thought in the comments or on our Facebook page.

Need to clear your mind? Ask yourself these 20 questions

January 20, 2015 by Power of Positivity

It is nothing new to say that we are overstimulated, overworked, and constantly distracted. As a result, our minds have become wired for constant stimulation. This is not a healthy way of being, however, and scientists constantly churn out research that reiterates this fact.

Through the redirection of your attention, you can clear your mind and discover what truly matters in life. One way to do this is by asking yourself some important questions. Keep in mind, there are no right or wrong answers – just questions that may provide some insight in how you live your life.

Here are 20 questions to help clear your mind from the daily grind:

Is it worse to fail or never try? Some people are more afraid of failing than giving themselves the opportunity to fail – the question is why?
If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be? We all have things we’re passionate about but what are we doing about it? Think about what you’d like to change in the world and do something, even if it’s something small.
Do you truly believe that your career is a calling, or are you just settling? If you’re not making a living out of your passion, perhaps there is some other outlet that would enable you to do so – even if it doesn’t involve money.
If you could offer one piece of advice to a child, knowing that they will follow it, what would it be? The knowledge and advice that we share with children can have a definite impact on the world. Try to give this advice where and when you can.
What’s holding you back from doing the one thing that you truly want to do? Again, this doesn’t have to be career-related. Perhaps it’s the trip you haven’t taken, the family member you haven’t visited, or the book that you haven’t taken the time to read.
If you had to move to another country besides the one you currently live, where would you go and why? The country that you grow up in often impacts how you think and live. If possible, try to visit this place at least once and see if there’s anything you can take away from the experience.
Have you been the type of friend that you would want as a friend? We are all happy to receive the company of a good friend, but are we returning the favor? We should all be loyal, kind, supportive, affectionate, and reliable to those that we call friends.
What are you most grateful for? Even though we are all extremely busy, it’s good practice to think of one or two things each day for which to be grateful. You’ll also find that making a habit of this positively affects your disposition throughout the day.
Do you tend to base your opinions in how you feel or how you think? Human beings are unique in that we can be both emotional and rational. There are times in which to follow your heart and there are times in which to follow your head.
Would you rather do work that you love or work that provides a good income? No wrong answer here. We all have different priorities, and some have people who rely on them. However, it’s still worth examining if only for your own knowledge and future choices.
How do you try to make each day count? It’s no secret that our days on this planet are limited. When looking back on your life, will you be able to say that it was lived to the fullest?
What is the difference between feeling truly alive and just living? I think we all want to feel as alive as possible without the complacency that daily life can bring…but what does this mean to you?
How would being rich change your life aside from being able to acquire a bunch of possessions? Our world is very materialistic – we want money to buy stuff. If you are seeking a big payday, do you have another reason other than buying things?
When was the last time that you focused on your breath? Chalk up another reason why a hectic world and lifestyle is bad for us – it makes it nearly impossible to be present. Focusing on your breath can have a positive, calming effect on your mood. Try it!
When you have time alone, what do you do? What do you do with the precious few moments of solitude that you have throughout the day? Consider the importance of solitude and make this valuable time count.
What actions have you taken on a cause that is important to you? Our world is filled with problems – problems that require a solution. You likely have some cause near and dear to your heart. Consider contributing in some way. Volunteer, donate, organize…you can make a difference my friend.
Who do you truly love in your life? How have you demonstrated this recently? Speaking of precious moments – how are you showing love to people that are important to you? Visit, call or send a quick text to someone who’d love to hear from you!
When you make a mistake, how do you treat yourself? Some of us hold ourselves to high standards and that’s okay! But do you beat yourself up for making a small mistake? How we react to a setback is often more important than the setback itself.
What are you doing to further understand yourself and your place in the world? Complacency is another reason why our hectic lives are not good. On the other hand contemplation, about yourself and your place in the world, is very good.
When living your life, do you truly make the decisions or does someone else make them for you? If there are any married men reading this, you are given a pass – we all know who makes those decisions! (Just kidding, just kidding). On a serious note, we should all consider to whom we’re giving the authority in regards to our decision making – is it you or someone else?

3 Ways to Improve Your Prayers for Healing

January 20, 2015 by Chris Butler

Many civilizations and cultures throughout history have utilized different forms of meditation or prayers for healing. In the modern world, people still incorporate prayer into their daily lives to find peace, hope, comfort, or even remedies for illnesses.

Unfortunately, many people become frustrated when their prayers aren’t answered immediately and sometimes give up the practice altogether. Do you still believe in the power of prayer and want to experience true divine healing? Then you will definitely want to read on for some powerful advice!

Praying Provides Substantial Health Benefits

Most people know that offering prayers for healing can help them grow spiritually. But many don’t know that you can also manifest physical benefits, too!

Note that these benefits do not point to any specific religion. Instead, they affirm your spiritual being and your faith. So whether you worship God, Allah, Jesus, Buddha, or any other being, these truths are universal. The name or label you assign to your deity does not matter in terms of the outcomes.

1 – Improvement in Heart Health

A 2014 study published by the Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine tracked thirty Muslim men during their prayers. They took electrocardiogram feedback tracked before, throughout, and after they prayed. They found that the heart rate was reduced during their worship. Besides that, their heartbeat sounded stronger. The researchers noted that this could help decrease their odds of developing cardiovascular disease.

2 – Help Overcome Depression and Trauma

In addition to physical benefits, prayers can have a positive impact for mental health. Specifically, an article in the journal Complementary Therapies in Medicine found that people who have depression rooted in childhood trauma engaged in worship as a form of meditation.
The research team noted that the meditative state spurred activity in the prefrontal cortex, which seems to help with emotional regulation. Additionally, they believe that praying seemed to help the subjects disassociate from the root trauma.

3 – Increased Optimism Helps You Bounce Back

Having an optimistic outlook can help someone navigate even the most stressful days with poise and a good attitude. But how do they do it?

Positivity helps contribute to learning to overcome those unexpected daily obstacles while remaining unruffled. As it turns out, the science backs up that claim!

Original research published in 2016 rounded up over three hundred articles that cited connections between prayer and wellness. Of those articles, 21 studies noted that praying had a two-pronged impact: decreasing depression (as mentioned in #2) and improving optimism. Optimism, they noted, relates directly to developing more advanced coping skills.

So when you say your prayers for healing, you are getting more than you bargained for.

Here are 3 Ways to Improve Your Prayers for Healing

All you need to do is ask. Have faith that your requests will be granted to manifest them into reality.

Include Chants or Mantras for Healing in Your Daily Practice

In reality, everything in life represents sound through vibrations and energy. Some sounds give off positive energy, while others operate at lower frequencies. Many ancient cultures and indigenous people believed in the power of chanting to heal themselves and others. Also, they used sacred instruments such as Tibetan singing bowls and gongs to capture the full spectrum of sound and combined these with their intention to instill healing within themselves or others.

As you sit down to pray, try putting on some relaxing music that includes such instruments, or you could even find a recording online of someone chanting certain mantras or sounds that resonate with you. Sounds have a potent effect on the mind and body and have even been known to eliminate tumors and other serious ailments within the physical self. By eliminating the negative energy that has built up over time, you will be in a much better position to receive physical and spiritual healing.

Set Your Intention Clearly in Your Prayers for Healing

Before you begin your practice, remember what you want to pray for. Or think of what messages you would like to receive from the higher realms. You may have many things on your mind. However, it helps to break them up into individual prayers so that you can deliver the prayer more clearly.

This will prompt your angels and spirit guides to offer you specific advice and knowledge. This guide will help you overcome the current challenge you face. If you pray for twenty different things at once, the universe will not know which of these takes priority over others. Therefore, you may not receive the full spectrum of healing.

Also, think of how you can offer your help in order to get what you’re asking for. For example, if you want more money, think of ways you can utilize your talents and skills in order to bring about peace and healing in the world. The universe wants to help you. But you must be willing to put in the effort and meet it halfway.

Imagine that Healing Has Already Taken Place

If you truly want healing and peace in your life, you must consider it already done. You must believe that you have the capacity to heal yourself through the power of prayer and then picture what it would feel like to accept that gift into your life.

Picture yourself as already healed, and then it will be so. Don’t think of yourself as a broken, incomplete being that will never reach your full potential, but rather, think of yourself as a powerful part of the universe that can accomplish extraordinary endeavors beyond your comprehension.

It’s a paradox; even if you don’t feel you have been healed yet, you must picture it as already so, and the metaphysical vibrational realm will slowly work to match the physical realm if you hold your intention long enough.

Final Thoughts on Putting Your Prayers for Healing Into Effect

Our thoughts and intentions have a genuine and significant role in how our physical realities play out, so you must pay attention to what your thoughts tell you and transform them to match the reality you want to see.

If you want to heal, you must think peaceful, transformative thoughts in order to see them manifest before your eyes. You have to wholeheartedly believe in the power of what you cannot see to make your vision come to life. After all, believing is seeing. If you believe in something long enough, you will inevitably see it.

Remember that prayer represents something different for every person. Thus, these tips only serve as a guideline to help you in your spiritual practice. If you have any other tips or advice to help others in their prayer for healing, please join in the discussion below!

10 Things to Figure Out Before Falling In Love

January 18, 2015 by Power of Positivity

If you’re not currently in a romantic relationship but open to the possibility, it’s the perfect time to assess both yourself and what you desire out of your true love. We plan so many different aspects of our lives – education, finances, career, health. So why don’t we prepare for finding love? As a consequence, most people tend to “figure things out” as they enter (and especially exit) many relationships.

Contrary to popular belief, certain knowledge and understanding can be acquired that helps the likelihood of true love. Yes, love is an emotion and a powerful one…but it’s not as mysterious as many make it out to be. In other words, there are ways to prepare yourself to experience love – ways to figure it out. The great thing is that by preparing yourself beforehand, when true love does come, it’ll be more blissful than you could imagine.

Here are 10 things to figure out when preparing to find true love:

1 – Focus on yourself

This is number one for a very good reason – you should not prioritize romance before yourself. If there are any areas of your life that are off-balance or things that you wish to rectify, do so. Do you feel there are emotional needs to be tended to? Then, take care of them. If your finances are a problem, figure them out. Or, if you hate your job, don’t like your appearance, whatever the case may be – focus on taking care of yourself before attempting to care for someone else.

You’ll find that you’re more confident and, as a result, will put your best face forward. Yes, this is important when finding your true love, but it’s even more important for you.

2 – Understand what you want

Relationship experts continue to state that many of us remain clueless about what we want or need in a relationship… and then wonder why the divorce rate is sky high. Other people remain in a cycle of dating merry-go-round – getting on and off without going anywhere.

Psychologists and relationship experts recommend the following four tenets for successful dating:

– Define your core values – religious beliefs, financial priorities, views on divorce, wanting children or not, money management skills, etc.

– Understand your emotional needs and personality type

– Don’t get physical before assessing long-term potential

– Assess the relationship to your core values as it progresses

3 – Observe good relationships

What better way to learn what makes a couple tick than to learn from people in great relationships? Maybe your parents or grandparents have been married for a good while. Take some time to sit down with one of them and ask a few questions about how they’ve been able to make it work.

If you feel uncomfortable asking a family member, talk to a good friend that is in a solid relationship. Have an open, honest conversation with that person and learn from their experience. Just make sure to speak with someone in a long-term relationship. No, your best friend that’s been dating someone for two months doesn’t count.

The people that care about you want to see that you’re happy, and if they feel that they can contribute to this they’ll be more than willing to oblige.

4 – Learn from the past

While reliving past relationships isn’t the most pleasing experience, there is much wisdom to be gained from them. As we’ve said before – when you enter a relationship, you either acquire a person to be loved or lesson to be learned.

Among the lessons to be learned from past relationships:

– We all need alone time and space.

– Nobody else can complete you but you.

– You can’t change someone else.

– Lust fades away; only love grows.

– Relationships often reflect our own circumstances.

5 – Forget the relationships that failed

“Regret is useless” as Marlon Brando once said, and this includes regretting failed relationships. The bottom line: that relationship failed for a reason. Perhaps you were not compatible or the circumstances weren’t right. However, that person is no longer there, and each moment spent regretting past relationships is another moment you can be preparing for the next one… the right one.

As with learning from the past, forgetting past relationships (especially a recent one) can be a difficult thing to do. However, this is necessary if you are going to live in the present and move forward in potential relationships.

6 – Be your true self – all the time

Part of compatibility in a relationship is being comfortable in your own skin and having someone who is comfortable in theirs. This compatibility leads to appreciation for each other while the relationship continues to flourish.

There isn’t anyone worth changing yourself for – this includes any potential mate. Anyways, it’s only a matter of time before your “true self” is revealed.

7 – Control your anxiety

When you first meet someone, it is normal to have butterflies in the stomach. Even after the first couple dates, those butterflies may still be there. After a while, those feelings should start to diminish, and you’ll begin to feel more comfortable.

Much of this anxiety is because of self-consciousness – it’s natural. However, if you are being yourself and remaining in the moment, there is nothing to be overly anxious about.

8 – Practice honest, effective communication

How you communicate with someone shouldn’t be determined by the situation. Regardless of the individual in front of you, speak with honesty and sincerely – especially with someone you’re just getting to know.

Moving forward in your relationships, make the sincere effort to speak with integrity and courage. Don’t negate your thoughts and feeling by not speaking about them. If you are being sincere and the other person doesn’t like what you’re saying, that’s their prerogative.

9 – Don’t force anything

Having somebody to share your life with is a nearly universal desire. Who doesn’t want to experience the love and companionship of one special person?

While you may internally want this to the utmost, it is important that you don’t force anything. Someone may be attractive and charming, but if there is no chemistry there it’ll never work. If you implement the things on this list and remain steadfast, you’ll eventually find that one person – without forcing anything.

10 – Put this list into practice

You can read all the articles, books and blogs in the world, but none of it helps if it’s ignored or forgotten.

BONUS: Be friends first.

When you decide to get into a relationship, be sure to establish a good friendship. The best relationships come from a place where there is more than a physical attraction. Without a good understanding of each other as people, rather than lovers, the physical attraction may wear thin with nothing left to support it.

Final Thoughts on Preparing Yourself for Falling in Love

If you remember nothing else, remember this: a relationship is supposed to be natural. Don’t place so much pressure on the outcome. Be yourself. You’re going to make someone, somewhere extremely happy when you do.

Add to the discussion: What did you have to learn before finding true love? Share your life lessons in the conversation below! Or, feel free to weigh in on Facebook.

35 Ways to Improve Your Relationships

January 18, 2015 by Power of Positivity

Complicated relationships = a complicated life.

Most people would take simplicity over complexity any day, but many aren’t sure how to improve their relationships to get to that point of simplicity, where their relationships seem to flow (and grow) effortlessly. If you want to improve your relationships and create stronger, longer bonds, this simple guide is sure to help:

35 Ways to Improve Your Relationships

1 – Stay true to yourself.

Be honest with who you are and what kind of life you want to live. By living with integrity, it allows the right people to come into your life, and it helps you become your best self.

2 – Share your flaws with your significant other.

Your flaws don’t define you, but others will feel more comfortable with them once you begin to accept them yourself.

3 – Simplify yourself.

Align your thoughts, actions, and words, and your life will automatically become simpler. Be you, all the way through.

4 – Don’t seek approval from anyone but you.

Be confident in your ability to discern bad choices from good ones, and remember that only you can determine the right path for your life.

5 – Practice self-love, self-care, and self-respect.

Before anyone else can care for you, love you, and respect you, you must give all of these things to yourself.

6 – Observe yourself without judgment.

Next time you feel inferior, try to look at the situation from a neutral point of view. Don’t be so hard on yourself – everyone is human, and everyone makes mistakes.

7 – Feel comfortable with your partner having friends of the opposite sex.

Even if it might make you slightly jealous for them to hang out with other guys or girls, let them have the freedom to hang out with who they want. Time apart makes for fonder hearts, too.

8 – Give up your need to have the last word.

You can’t always be right, so don’t try. Sometimes, silence really does speak louder than words.

9 – Show unabashed love.

Love freely, and open your heart to others. Let small acts of kindness or affection show your partner how much he or she means to you.

10 – Always follow your heart.

No one knows you better than you do, so honor your soul and what it wants for you. It will always have your best interest in mind.

11 – Be independent, but not too independent.

Take help when it’s offered; you don’t have to do everything alone.

12 – Accept others for who they are.

Don’t try to mold others into what you think they should be; instead, love them exactly the way they are.

13 – Have open communication with your partner.

Talk about problems, fears, insecurities, dreams, doubts, funny memories, and everything in between. Your partner should be your best friend who you can come to with anything, so don’t hide your feelings or thoughts from them.

14 – Don’t blow problems out of proportion.

Talk about things rationally with your partner, and the problem will likely get solved a lot quicker.

15 – Practice minimalism.

Only keep things that you absolutely need; a simple life gives way to simpler relationships.

16 – Explore spirituality personally and with your partner.

While a spiritual journey is a personal one, invite your partner to meditate or go to Reiki sessions with you. This will strengthen your relationship and open up a whole new door of exploration for you two.

17 – Love without expectations.

Love is not a competition; it moves freely through each of us, and we can make this world a much more beautiful place by offering our love regardless of what it can give to us.

18 – Appreciate other people.

Tell them and show them that you notice their positive attributes and that you value who they are as a person.

19 – Be proud of yourself.

Take pride in your accomplishments and your character; you’ve come a long way in life and deserve your own attention and recognition for it.

20 – Listen more, talk less.

Be a listening ear for others; you might be the only person in their life that listens to them.

21 – Practice gratitude.

Remain thankful, through the good and the bad. There’s always a lesson within every experience in life.

22 – Try not to complain.

Complaining only lowers your energy levels; try to see the silver lining in the clouds, and take it as an important lesson learned.

23 – Talk calmly and honestly.

Don’t let your emotions get the best of you – always try to speak from a place of love and understanding.

24 – Compliment your partner.

Show him or her that you notice that new outfit or haircut, or that you’re proud of their hard work.

25 – Be mindful of your actions.

What you do usually affects more people than just yourself, so keep that in mind when you make big decisions in your life.

26 – Remind yourself that you’re beautiful, inside and out.

Give yourself love, always. Don’t be so critical of yourself; love who you are, where you are, exactly HOW you are.

27 – Let go of past pain.

It helped shape your character, but it doesn’t have to stick with you your whole life.

28 – Have simple dates, like picnics.

Enjoy nature and simpler foods. Relish in the outdoors and the freedom it can bring from time to time.

29 – Let your guard down.

Bring down your walls so others can get inside.

30 – Support each other’s goals.

Encourage one another to go beyond yourselves and reach for your wildest dreams.

31 – Be there for one another, always.

Help each other out when you need it, and offer support when necessary.

32 – Let your partner grow in whatever way they need to.

Even if it means you have to grow apart for a while, let them walk their journey however they see fit.

33 – Try new things together.

Getting out of your comfort zone will actually make your life simpler because it will help you get rid of any fears you may have about the world.

34 – Set aside time each day for relaxation.

Drop out of the fast pace of the world for a while, and just take pleasure in some good old-fashioned R&R.

35 – Live in the now.

Now is the only time we really have; live fully in the present.

Weekly tips, affirmations, and small actions to feel your best.

Every day is a day to shine. Shine on!