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9 Signs You Can’t Trust Someone

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Trust is an important part of any kind of relationship. However, trusting someone is hard when the world is filled with deceptive people.

In the book, “The Science of Relationships,”  the experts wrote that trust, which entails a person’s hopes and aspirations, is put side by side with his fears and worries. No wonder you might be having trouble giving their trust completely because you know there’s a risk your closeness with someone might turn into betrayal.

Fortunately, life will give you red flags and warnings. Here are some signs that may indicate you cannot trust someone:

Here Are 9 Signs You Can’t Trust Someone

“Trust is earned when actions meet words.” – Chris Butler

1.    If the person gossips about other people

It might seem like an innocent pastime at work or among your friends but gossiping has hurt and ruined a lot of relationships.

  • Anyone who gossips to you about another person may easily gossip about you to other people, too.
  • Some people might start gossiping as a way to vent about a colleague at work or a friend. But it would be very inappropriate for a boss to talk about another staff member with his peers.
  • If your friends are judging someone else’s business, you don’t need to be in this circle.
  • If you’re uncomfortable about hearing gossip, subtly say that you’d rather talk about this when the person involved is around so you can also hear their side.

To be completely fair to the other side, a study in the journal Psychoneuroendocrinology showed that there are positive effects to gossiping. It can strengthen bonds between friends or groups and it can also help you figure out who to trust.

2.    If the person is not approachable or secretive

Do you work with someone who doesn’t seem to be approachable? Does he keep to himself and seem inaccessible when you have questions or concerns? Do you have a friend who’s a bit secretive and keeps information to herself, or avoids getting into a serious conversation?

  • There’s a lot of reasons a person might have a wall around him. For this reason, it’s important to define the kind of secrecy a person demands.
  • He might be secretive if he values his privacy and would like to impose boundaries that align with his belief.
  • Being secretive might also be a way for an individual to protect himself or his interests from judgment, reprisals, or consequences.

The impact of the secrecy will depend on the information or detail that was hidden. It also depends on the type of relationship, because certain secrets do not have a place in committed relationships. Sneaky actions from your partner can immediately send your radar running wild, even if you’re not a suspicious person.

If you think that the other person is being secretive, try to approach the situation by inviting a dialogue or a serious conversation. If you allow the person to open up, then you’re giving him the opportunity to explain himself and prove that he can be trusted.

3.    If they flip-flop

Now, people have the right to change their mind even on critical matters that may impact a lot of people. At work, for example, if your colleagues have the right facts, information, or data, they are entitled to veer in a different direction. In this case, flip-flopping arises from a necessity.

In other cases, however, it might be an indication of opportunism. It is hard to trust a flip-flopper who changes his stand due to pressure or convenience. It’s even harder when the person places the blame on you when something goes wrong.

Unfortunately, some flip-floppers look for scapegoats and behave without consideration. For instance, no matter how friendly you are with a colleague at work, your friendship will only come second when he’s under a lot of stress and pressure from the higher-ups. So, he’ll easily change his mind to please his superiors and leave you on the lurch.

In friendships, flip-floppers don’t have any qualms taking advantage of people. They may emotionally and financially drain you if you don’t set some boundaries. You might extend your help to a friend like this but eventually, being in a relationship with someone who can’t make a solid stand for what he values or who’s contradicting himself can be toxic. Don’t ignore the red flags.

4.    If they are insecure

Some people with low self-esteem mask their insecurities by having an animated persona. They can be exuberant and over-eager to make their presence felt. As a result, anyone who’s getting more attention or recognition might be seen as a threat. So, they may behave in a petty manner and raise accusations against you even when you’re not doing anything wrong.

You cannot trust a person with insecurities because they can manipulate situations to favor themselves while avoiding issues or instances that might highlight their shortcomings or expose their vulnerabilities. As with flip-floppers, spending time with someone who’s insecure can become emotionally draining. You have to set boundaries as well, lest you become this person’s caretaker.

If this person is someone you have to face every day, it might help to sit down and have a heartfelt conversation about their pettiness and insecurities. In your discussion, don’t forget to stress the positive aspect of your relationship, whether it’s personal or professional. Also, try to do the following:

  • Reassure the person that there’s no reason to be upset.
  • Demonstrate that you are committed to your relationship or partnership.
  • Emphasize that for this partnership to work, you have to trust each other.
  • Explore past issues that might trigger why this person can behave irrationally.
  • Show encouragement.

5.    If they always agree with you

The very nature of people-pleasers is that they are untrustworthy. They are similar to flip-floppers who don’t have a stand or opinion on matters. The “Yes” person will always agree with what you say or do.

These people are motivated to say yes because they think it aligns with what you want from them. Don’t mistake this for being supportive though. Deep in the hearts of people-pleasers, they have different ideals and goals than yours.

If they cannot be authentic about their feelings, then how do you know if their support is sincere? Worse, people who always agree with you may end up resenting you because they were never able to express their true self around you.

A study from UC Berkeley stated that people-pleasers do not have any integrity and aren’t exactly fooling anyone. Those who think it’s beneficial to please others actually end up more stressed or anxious because inauthenticity can take its toll.

6.    If they are cruel to their friends or colleagues

Good-natured ribbing between friends is common, especially if you’re familiar with each other. But in some cases, familiarity may also breed contempt. Teasing can quickly escalate into an abuse if the person who does the teasing has a strong or abrasive personality.

  • People with abrasive personalities have a way of making others feel uncomfortable.
  • They might lack empathy and are missing a sensitivity chip so they say the wrong words at the worst times.
  • They may sound cruel and undermine the people in their inner circle or group.
  • If they can behave like this with their friends, they will likely behave the same way towards you even if you’re just getting to know them.

The problem with abrasive people is that they often don’t know they are being cruel to someone. According to the Harvard Business Review, they need to be told over and over about the impact and reality of their actions. They might be too defensive to see how their behavior is costing friendships or the harmony in their relationships.

7.    If they apologize with a “but…”

People who say, “I’m sorry, but….” are not in any way apologizing for whatever they’ve done. The “but” is an excuse and a justification, thus they will not likely change their ways or correct their mistake. They will not also own up to this mistake so they are bound to repeat it.

Politicians are notorious for non-apologies like this. It’s no wonder they have a hard time earning the people’s trust. Insincere apologies are the mark of people who don’t respect or value others, so why should you give this person your trust?

On the subject of apologies, sometimes it’s better not to apologize by saying the words. Sometimes an action to fix the problem is in order. People see a person’s authentic sincerity more through actions than words.

8.    If they cannot give explanations

Any time someone blurts out the words, “Why should I have to explain everything to you?” it’s a red flag that this person might not be worthy of your trust. If he’s not willing to answer your questions or provide clarity on an issue that’s bugging you, then he is not being honest and may be hiding something.

trust

If this is happening at work, it’s your right to ask questions. Requesting an explanation enables you to be properly guided in order to contribute better to the project. You won’t be able to do your work right if your boss doesn’t define what’s needed or give you needed resources and tools. If he withholds information altogether, you will end up not effectively completing the project at hand.

In a personal relationship, uttering the above phrase may sound defensive, especially if you were just asking a simple question. Don’t ignore the alarm bells that start ringing.

9.    If they take credit for other people’s accomplishments

A credit-grabber falls in the same category as the one who flip-flops and the “Yes” man. This type of person will not think twice about throwing anyone under the bus to save their own skin. Such an attitude can breed distrust among a group or team.

If this happens to you though, here are a few steps you can take:

  • There’s no better response towards someone who takes credit for your accomplishment except to take the high road.
  • Don’t let this attitude affect you since her lies will likely be discovered sooner than later.
  • Instead, find other opportunities to shine in your work and get recognized by the people who are higher than your boss.
  • Volunteer or tag along in special projects that you know you can contribute to or give superiors regular updates and progress reports so that they know you are part of the contributing team.

Final Thoughts On Signs You Can’t Trust Someone

Trusting someone is often a judgment call. If you’ve taken note of these nine red flags carefully, you will be able to learn how to filter untrustworthy people out of your life. This way, you can protect yourself from becoming a victim of deception or unfair treatment.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WeJ8dXDZUcA

15 Signs of a Gifted Child

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Let us begin this article by making one crucial point: Intelligence, true intelligence, is a notoriously difficult thing to measure. During his childhood, Thomas Edison passed on to his mother a note from his teacher, saying that his child was “addled” – an old-time word for “dumb.” Edison was many things, but dumb he was not. In fact, he was a truly gifted child.

One of Einstein’s teachers also said he was “mentally slow, unsociable and adrift forever in foolish dreams.” Perhaps he was dreaming about physics. Maybe he was developing the greatest mind that history has ever known. You certainly get the picture. (And what on earth was wrong with teachers in those days?)

The National Association for Gifted Children (NAGC) defines giftedness as “ability … significantly above the normal for [a child’s] age.” A child may be gifted in one or more areas, including:

  • Artistic
  • Creative
  • Intellectual (I.Q.)
  • Leadership
  • An academic field such as language arts, mathematics, or science. (1)

“Gifted children already know nearly 60 percent of all kindergarten material on the very first day of class.” – The National Association for Gifted Children

Eight Areas of Intelligence

There are likely many more areas of intelligence than those listed above. The theory of multiple intelligence put forth by Harvard Professor Dr. Howard Gartner proposes eight abilities that can be considered elements of human intellect:

  1. Bodily-kinesthetic: physical abilities; bodily agility; hand-eye coordination; handling of objects.
  2. Intrapersonal: abilities applied “within the self”; self-awareness or introspection of beliefs, emotions, goals, and motivations.
  3. Interpersonal: interacting with and understanding others – verbal and non-verbal communication; sensitivity to others’ moods and temperaments.
  4. Logical-mathematical: understanding abstract and complex ideas; deductive reasoning; detecting patterns; working with numbers.
  5. Musical-rhythmic: discerning pitch, rhythm, and tone; movement to music; development of rhythms; the creation, recognition, reflection, and reproduction of music.
  6. Naturalistic: relation to physical surroundings; growth of natural foods (e.g. fruits and vegetables); nature survival; knowledge of animals, plants, etc.
  7. Verbal-linguistic: understanding and use of language; verbal and written skills; use of rhythm, sound, and tone in words; memory of images, faces, and fine details.
  8. Visual-spatial: cognition involving images and pictures; spatial judgment and reasoning; visualization of objects. (2)

gifted woman

The Differences Between “Gifted” and “Bright”

We must understand that gifted children are not just “bright” – a highly subjective label. This is certainly the first step in understanding how to give them the help they need to succeed. Christopher Taibbi, M.A.T., an expert in the field of gifted education, explains four critical differences between the gifted child and the bright child:

Smart kids work hard to achieve. In contrast, gifted children quickly can become bored.

Intelligent kids are a teacher’s dream come true. They show up on time, behave themselves, and work hard. As a result, they succeed in the classroom. Smart-yet-not-gifted kids are more likely to succeed in the traditional academic setting, as they are motivated primarily by grades and recognition. Therein lies a big problem for gifted kids: neither grades nor recognition typically drives them.

Gifted kids often already know the answers without much effort. This can cause problems in the traditional classroom. Gifted kids will often withdraw into their rich inner worlds without internal incentives and external stimulation.

Smart kids know all the answers; gifted children ask all the questions.

Bright kids are excellent at processing and retaining information. This fact and their work ethic lead to outstanding academic achievement. Gifted learners often do not need nearly as much repetition to become familiar with the material. As a result, gifted kids are forced to sit through hours of class time when they could “pass a test” and move on.

Since the gifted kid’s insatiable curiosity is not being quenched, they’ll dig more deeply into the subject and want to know everything about it. They’ll ask themselves questions, use Google or a book to find the answers, and effortlessly retain their newly acquired knowledge. So, when the next class comes around, the gifted kid is already well beyond anything the teacher teaches.

Bright kids like the classroom; gifted children don’t (usually).

As mentioned, the typical classroom setting is perfect for a bright child to succeed. In contrast, this is often not the case for gifted kids. Gifted children’s incompatibility with the traditional classroom setting is generally attributable to a lack of stimulation.

Due to opposing extremes – extreme curiosity and extreme boredom – gifted kids usually become self-directed learners, taking responsibility for their own education. Unlike the classroom setting, self-learning allows the gifted child to indulge their highly inquisitive nature – an absolute must for them to learn effectively.

Bright kids are clever, while gifted children are original.

Think of the great innovators – da Vinci, Tesla, Graham Bell, Edison, Gates, Jobs. All original minds, these men were (likely) what we now recognize as “gifted.” Most noteworthy, some didn’t have the best scholastic records.

Many gifted children live for putting their ideas into action. When something (like an academic subject) catches their attention, gifted kids want to both learn and apply what they learn. This penchant for original thinking and innovation is another reason why an alternative educational environment is often optimal for gifted kids.

15 Signs of a Gifted Child

You may be wondering how to identify a gifted kid. Well, here are fifteen signs to look for:

1. They sound like a professor:

Gifted children often reach knowledge milestones much faster than average. Language skills, in particular, seem to come more naturally for the gifted children. An extensive vocabulary and speaking in complex sentences are two ways that a child may exhibit these skills.

2. They identify patterns:

Pattern identification (e.g. a jigsaw puzzle or what time of day Mommy comes home) isn’t ubiquitous in little ones. Unless that is, your little one possesses gifted-level intellect.

3. Gifted children are voracious readers:

Gifted kids, as mentioned earlier, have an insatiable curiosity. To satisfy this curiosity, they’ll read every book they can get their little mitts on. This sign is especially evident when something piques their interest.

4. They’re incredibly talented at something:

Gifted is just another word for “exceptionally talented.” Some kids are naturals at certain things, like sports, science, or the arts. Extreme talent is almost assuredly a sign of gifted intelligence.

5. They like the company of adults or older kids:

Because of their advanced intelligence, gifted kids have difficulty relating to their peers. They may be misunderstood – or just plain bored. As such, they may seek out older kids, teachers, and other adults for stimulation.

6. A gifted child has excellent focus:

Okay, so there is a caveat to this one. Most gifted kids have an exceptional ability to focus on the things that interest them. However, a gifted kid stuck in a boring classroom will quickly lose this ability. As such, they might even be considered as having poor focus in a typical classroom setting.

gifted children

7. They are mature:

A gifted child can also have deep emotional intelligence. If you have a gifted child, they may shake their heads at the antics of their peers. Gifted children won’t pull too many pranks or get into (too much) mischief.

8. They are original:

Being gifted and problem-solving often go together. Not only do these kids approach everyday problems differently, but they may also offer suggestions on improving something.

9. They are leaders:

Because of their maturity and uncanny ability to solve problems and think outside the box, some gifted kids show a remarkable aptitude for leadership. Of course, these skills are more evident when the child is in a desirable setting.

10. They don’t need directions:

While some kids patiently wait for the parent or teacher to say how they want something done, gifted kids jump right into it and ask questions later. Or not ask questions at all, having figured things out independently.

11. They’re high energy:

Gifted kids, probably because their brain is always going, seem be in perpetual movement. Notice, too, that really smart and gifted kids tend to speak way too fast. The reason for this verbal assault is that they’re trying (unsuccessfully!) to get their words to catch up with their thoughts.

12. They need some “me time”:

Like most children, gifted kids love spending time with people. But solitude allows them to be alone with their thoughts and exercise their creativity. Gifted kids enjoy solitary activities such as reading, writing, and drawing.

13. Giften children love nature:

Some gifted kids, especially those with high artistic intelligence, love the sights and sounds of nature. Their curiosity and talents of observation may be on full display when out in nature.

14. They underachieve:

Yes, you read that correctly. While highly intelligent, gifted kids tend to devote most of their mental energy toward things of interest. It is not uncommon for an advanced kid to excel at one subject and struggle with another. Underachievement for gifted kids usually results from short attention spans, carelessness, frustration, and flat-out boredom.

15. They think learning is fun:

Gifted children love learning so much that it becomes a hobby. Because of their advanced intelligence and love of learning, the child may share few interests with his or her peers.

gifted child

Final Thoughts: The Importance of Identifying Gifted Children

“An accurate label, and a clear explanation, and ongoing guidance about what it means to be gifted will help gifted children adapt.” – Gail Post, Ph.D.

Identifying intelligence is vital to a child’s development despite all the problems associated with identifying intelligence. For example, finding out if a child is developmentally challenged can mean the difference between success and failure. This also applies to a gifted child.

Gifted children who remain unidentified often become targets for labeling and bullying. Indeed, we cannot afford to let this happen. A gifted child has the potential to become a leader in this complex global society. Above all, children with unique gifts must be placed in the right situations and allowed to obtain success – on their terms.

11 Signs Someone Is Hiding Their Feelings

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As children, we’ve been taught that certain negative emotions like anger or sadness have to be suppressed. But shoving these feelings under the rug can have a high cost to our general emotional well-being and health.

According to the Scientific American, these negative feelings have to be acknowledged and addressed in the same way that positive emotions have to be cultivated. If these feelings aren’t threshed out, then people won’t be able to find contentment in their life. At worst, they may even descend to fits of depression.

Here Are 11 Signs That Someone Is Hiding Their Feelings

“Life is too short to hide your feelings. Don’t be afraid to say what you feel.” – Unknown

1.    They put a positive spin on the negative things in their life.

People who hide their feelings try, as much as possible, to show people around them that they are fine. So, they remain the optimist that cannot be dampened even if life has thrown them many challenges.

According to Tali Shalot, the author of the book “The Optimism Bias,” humans are wired to be positive as a coping mechanism. People who remain hopeful despite the odds stacked against them are apparently more relaxed and less stressed out than those who fill their hearts with anxiety and negativity.

A study in the journal Cancer Nursing showed that pessimistic patients are likely to die within eight months of their diagnosis. Being an optimist has also been proven to influence job and relationship success.

But some experts have criticized that staying positive isn’t always a realistic approach to dealing with a person’s real feelings. Unless this person has a balanced mindset when it comes to facing a major roadblock in their life, their positive thinking might sometimes be misplaced. In short, it won’t help them with their struggles in the long run.

2.    They are constantly busy.

Someone who could be hiding their feelings needs distractions so they don’t have to deal with their emotions. So, they stay at the office late at night. They keep their social calendar booked. Additionally, they enlist in many recreations and activities that take up their time and focus.

It’s easier for these people to occupy themselves with things to do even if their jam-packed day makes them physically tired. The exhaustion is nothing compared to facing their emotional struggles, which they are obviously not prepared to do. They stall with these distractions.

Something positive might come out of being a workaholic because they can fatten up their bank account and enrich their experience as a social butterfly. Unfortunately, the feelings they try to suppress will still keep popping up. It will remain unless they deal with it.

3.    They withdraw from the people who matter most.

While people who repress their feelings might try to make themselves busy, some withdraw from the important people in their lives as their coping mechanism. They do this to avoid confronting their emotions, which are likely triggered by the ones they are running away from.

“Out of sight, out of mind” might work for a while. Disconnecting may bring temporary peace of mind. Once they have buried negative feelings deep inside their psyche, they resurface as if nothing happened. But this coping mechanism has its risks.

If those feelings come back, will they disappear again? The truth is running away can work …  until it doesn’t. Sometimes, the ultimate realization that a person isn’t really okay could be more painful and destructive than dealing with those feelings when they first come around.

4.    They’d rather deal with other people’s problems than theirs.

Do you know someone who’s going through something but is still willing to help another friend in a crisis? It’s possible she’s masking her own feelings by absorbing herself in someone else. She avoids dealing with her own problems by spending so much time working out other people’s issues.

Think of it this way:

  • Sometimes it’s easier to solve other people’s problems than your own.
  • Giving your friends advice puts you in a better position to disengage from the problem.
  • It might seem you are thinking with more clarity.
  • But if you refuse to deal with the consequences of your own problems, that means you’re probably not following your own advice.

To understand why it’s easier to solve other people’s problems, researchers looked into something they termed as “psychologically distant,” as per the Scientific American. The experts learned that people have more creative ideas and can better solve problems when they are not psychologically attached to the situation.

Those who like to “fix” the problems of others are also not responsible for the consequences. For instance, if you’re trying to help a friend patch up her marriage, you’re not going to be in the room dealing with a painful conversation with your friend’s significant other.

Ultimately, taking care of someone’s problems is another delaying tactic used by people who hide their feelings. It’s one thing to have compassion for other people. It’s another thing if it’s used as an excuse when you should really be compassionate to yourself and address what’s troubling you.

5.    They become consumed with irrational anxiety or paranoia.

Repressed feelings can surface in other ways that might lead to the development of irrational fears and paranoia. For example, you’ve sent a friend a message asking if she wants to watch a movie. When she does not respond, you immediately think she doesn’t want to spend time with you.

That irrational anxiety can escalate to other thoughts that might bring you to conclude that none of your friends like you and they probably never did.

  • When you have irrational fears, you start to notice little details.
  • Your perception grows distorted and clouded.
  • Hiding somewhere in your psyche is the actual problem or feeling you’ve never acknowledged.
  • It’s messing with your thoughts, giving your a generally negative state of mind.

Do you know that repressed feelings may impact your physical health, aside from your mental health? Studies have shown that unresolved emotions can affect sleep quality, as per Psychology Today. Some people experience sleep disruptions or difficulty going to sleep because of their bottled feelings.

People can also become literally sick when they have episodes of anxiety, as per the Harvard Health. They develop muscle pain, digestive problems, a weakened immune system, constant headaches or colds, and other illnesses. Apparently, this is the body’s way of confronting what ails the emotions.

6.    Their self-esteem drops.

People who hide their feelings might choose to drown out and numb their emotions by letting go of the issues that bother them. On the surface, it might seem like they are taking the high road but it’s actually a way for them to protect what’s left of their self-esteem.

A person with low self-esteem will generally not assert herself. She will avoid showing her true feelings and abilities to other people. Afraid of perceived failures, confrontations or rejections, she might think that she’s not entitled to bring up feelings of hurt and being broken. She likely fears her other friends would only disregard these emotions.

7.    They turn to self-destructive behaviors.

When a person is overwhelmed with emotions, he might turn to self-destructive behaviors to cope. Some examples of self-destruction include:

  • Addiction to drugs
  • Addiction to intimacy even with random strangers
  • Sabotaging their own happiness or success
  • Alcohol abuse
  • Self-injury
  • Eating disorders
  • Suicide attempts
  • Dating people who are bad influences

Aside from being unable to manage emotions, self-destructive behaviors may also stem from low self-esteem and a lack of self-confidence. Dr. Peggilee Wupperman via Psychology Today stated that when a person habitually suppresses the negative emotions, he likely decreases any positive feelings too. Uncertain of any value, meaning or hope in his life, he becomes self-destructive.

8.    They don’t like being spontaneous.

People who can’t deal with their true feelings might be uncomfortable with spontaneity and surprises. They want to plan everything ahead of time because they want to maintain control of what’s going to happen. They want the ability to predict what they can expect from every situation.

Though spontaneity might spring positive surprises, they don’t like any opportunity for hitches to crop up when they have not planned ahead. This will easily send them straight to panic mode because they might have to confront emotions they have been trying to hide.

As with maintaining a busy schedule, getting downtime or a free day won’t be welcome for someone who hides their feelings. Downtimes mean there is room to sit down and process. This is not something such a person will be ready for.

9.    They vent but not to the one they have issues with.

This passive-aggressive behavior is evident in social media today. Ever notice a friend posting quotes or messages that seem to hint at their struggles, frustrations, or anger at someone? But while they vent about what’s bothering them in a public platform, usually the person that should read or see the message has no clue. Your friend who is hiding their emotions probably never discussed her problems with the person involved.

feelings

But when questioned about what has been shared on their social media status, people who hide their feelings usually downplay the situation. They might deny that something’s wrong or post a smiley emoticon to show that they are happy and at peace.

Communicating in a passive-aggressive manner is quite unproductive and may harm the relationship even more. Though it is calmer than an actual confrontation, being upfront and honest about your feelings still brings the message across better.

10. They blow up over insignificant things.

Hidden feelings bring up misdirected anger. So, it’s not surprising to see a person who has been suppressing her emotions to blow up over things that aren’t worth the energy.

For instance, you might have forgotten to buy milk so you cannot have it for breakfast. But this sends your partner in a fit that ends in a big fight between the two of you first thing in the morning.

You might think that your partner is blowing up over nothing but her anger is rooted in a deeper problem. Because she has not been sharing this problem and hiding her feelings, it might look to you that she’s being petty.

11. They act like they’re fine.

They might seem fine, tough, and placid on the outside. They might look like nothing bothers them even if their world is already crumbling down. But this is a mask. The harder they pretend they are not affected, the more help they really need.

Final Thoughts On Signs Someone Is Hiding Their Feelings

Keeping emotions locked up is like having a ticking time bomb. The one who will suffer the most when this eventually blows up is the person who’s hiding their feelings.

If you realize that you have been hiding negative feelings, don’t feel like you’re the only one. Many people have a difficult time dealing with overwhelming emotions. At the same time, try to realize that you cannot really run away from your feelings. Both positive and negative emotions are integral parts of human nature and survival. Learning to deal with the negative emotions in a positive way will lead you toward a road of healing and happiness.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FnJLrAQrzjw

11 Habits of Truly Polite People

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The simple act of being polite can improve your life. Polite people often have better relationships, gain respect, and increase self-confidence and esteem. On the other hand, being rude can make life much more difficult.

It is fair to say that one’s propensity for polite behavior comes down to exposure. That is, if you grew up in a household where being polite was emphasized (or expected) you probably have proper behaviors and habits. On the other hand, if you were not taught the importance of being polite, you may lack some needed social cues.

In this article, we’ll talk about eleven habits of genuinely polite people, what studies say, and how you can be more courteous! Let’s get to it!

Here are eleven habits of polite people:

polite people

1. They’re excellent listeners

Polite people always seem to have excellent active listening skills. Active listening is the act of fully concentrating, understanding, responding to, and remembering what the other person says. Active listeners resist the urge to speak over someone. You allow people to finish their thoughts before introducing your own.

To improve your active listening skills:

  • Give your full attention to the speaker. If your attention drifts, bring it back.
  • Show that you’re listening by maintaining eye contact, nodding, and using positive body language.
  • Give proper feedback by reflecting on and paraphrasing the speaker’s words
  • Most importantly, do not interrupt unless necessary.

2. Polite people smile often

“Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.” – Thich Nhat Hanh

What do you think of when you see someone smiling? Well, like most people, you want to smile back. Have you ever considered why you often want to smile back when someone smiles? Well, besides being the polite thing to do, it turns out that smiling is (literally) contagious.

In one Swedish study, participants were shown a picture of a smiling face and asked to frown. Instead of frowning, the participants mimicked the facial expression in the picture – a smile!

3. They pay no mind to drama

Genuinely polite people don’t waste their time or energy listening to drama. They’re mature enough to know that not only is the drama pointless (no matter the form), but that it is also probably harmful to someone. While some less conscientious people see drama and think, “I can be a part of something,” the polite person sees drama and thinks “I want no part of it.”

Dismissing drama needn’t be abrasive or uncomfortable. When the local drama queen comes your way with a juicy tidbit, acknowledge with an “I see” and change the subject. No harm, no foul.

4. They’re not complainers

Okay, there is a time and place for (constructive) complaining. But there are complaining and complainers. The former is used as a conversational tool to air grievances; the latter is a type of person who takes the former to the extreme – by complaining about every little inconvenience.

Instead of complaining about something, write a gratitude list of three things for which you’re thankful. Put that list in your pocket. When the urge to complain about something arises – and it will – read your list.

5. Polite people think before speaking

We’re all adults now. As adults, we have the capacity – in fact, the obligation – to think before we speak. Not following such simple advice has led to many arguments, broken hearts, and damaged relationships. Polite people think before they speak at all times.

Here are a few things ways you can become a more thoughtful conversationalist:

  • Don’t feel pressured to say anything, ever.
  • If you require more time to respond, that’s okay; say so.
  • When you are about to say something impulsively, acknowledge it, take a deep breath, and think before responding.

6. They remember names

If you’re bad at remembering someone’s name, you’ve probably had that embarrassing moment when you wanted to utter the person’s name but couldn’t remember it. So, you had to fill in the name with something else. (“Oh, hey … man/buddy/chum/m’lady … nice morning, eh?”)

If being seen as polite isn’t enough motivation to file away someone’s name, consider it an opportunity to avoid face-flushing embarrassment. Here are a couple ways to remember that “person next door”:

  • Make a conscious decision to begin remembering names.
  • Actively listen.
  • Repeat their name, writing it down if you so wish.
  • Associate the first letter of the person’s name with a physical or personality trait. (“Jen with the shiny Jewelry,” “Tom with the buck Teeth,” etc.)

7. They neither gossip nor listen to it

Guess we could’ve filed this one under number three, but here it is. Gossip is something that mature adults shouldn’t do, period. Anyone who despises gossip will tell you it’s pointless, energy-draining, annoying, and despicable.

Let’s put it simply. If you’re (a) initiating gossip or (b) partaking in any way, please stop. You’re not only hurting someone, but you’re also draining your own energy and positivity.

8. Polite people don’t proselytize

Having beliefs and opinions is okay. Trying to force your beliefs or opinions onto someone else is not okay. Needless to say, polite people don’t drone on about their precious beliefs and opinions, knowing that such behavior is immature and rude.

Polite people don’t proselytize about anything. Ever.

9. They respect personal boundaries

Few things are more sacred to most people than personal space. In fact, attempting to impede someone’s personal space is often punishable by a look of disgust and forceful “Excuse me?!” Violating a polite person’s personal space may result in a subtle step in the opposite direction.

Speaking of personal space, not everyone is okay with casual touching or patting, even when done with the best of intentions. Hey, don’t scold the messenger (a huge patter/hugger/backslapper, BTW!)

10. They treat others as equals

You’ve probably heard of Warren Buffett. For those who haven’t, Mr. Buffet is one of the world’s wealthiest men with a net worth of around $90 billion. Buffett, though a shrewd businessman, is also incredibly modest and unfailingly polite. Some people in the financial sector who follow Mr. Buffett have actually complained about Buffett’s flawless manners, writing an article titled “Mr. Buffett, you are too polite.”

Buffett has a reputation of treating everyone he meets with dignity and respect, regardless of so-called status. Polite people treat others with respect and as equals.

11. They don’t judge others

Truly polite people do not judge others. The reason is quite simple: they don’t know the other’s story, nor do we. Judging someone is the epitome of ignorance, not to mention rudeness.

The truth is that when we judge, there’s something about ourselves – not someone else – with which we’re miserable. It’s up to us to find out what that “something” is and cease with the malicious judging of others.

polite people

How to Be More Polite

Here are some things that you can do to be seen as a polite individual:

Say Hello!

Greet people properly, initiate and sustain eye contact while smiling, and be approachable. The simple act of giving someone a genuine “Hello” helps make an excellent first impression.

Make light conversation.

Light conversation is different than small talk. The former is constructive and polite, while the latter is annoying and pointless. Ask someone how their family is doing, how their new job is going, or if anything is new in their life. Be friendly and open while remembering to pay attention to verbal and non-verbal cues.

Make an effort to remember details.

Remember the person’s name and any pertinent information they share with you. Don’t be embarrassed to write the info down so as not to forget. Greeting someone by their first name is warm, thoughtful, and kind.

Polite people say “please” and “thank you.”

When asking for something, say “please.” When receiving something, say “thank you.” Simple, but you’d be surprised how many of us don’t say it.

Hold doors open for others.

There are few things more rude than some able-bodied person not holding the door open for someone who is right behind them. Don’t be this person. Hold the door for a couple of seconds. You can handle it.

Polite people use proper language.

Respect other people and use appropriate, well-mannered language. The words that come out of your mouth should fit with the situation. When in public, lay off the cursing (and yelling). Actually, it would probably be wise to avoid this type of speech in private, too.

Respect other people’s time.

This one’s simple: be there when you say you will be there. If you aren’t, you should have a good excuse. Also, use your good judgment in determining how much time to take up; consider that the other person may be busy.

Be assertive when needed.

Being polite doesn’t mean letting people take your kindness for weakness. Put your foot down when someone tries to get one over on you.

Apologize when you screw up.

“I’m sorry” are two words that would save our world a whole bunch of trouble if people said them more. While your pride may be telling you to do something else, ignore it and apologize when you make a mistake.

Use balance – don’t overdo it.

There’s being polite, and there’s being just plain weird. If you start talking like Ned Flanders from “The Simpson’s,” you act the latter. Be polite, yes, but be authentic and honest as well!

polite people

Final Thoughts on Polite People

Politeness, a seemingly simple concept, comes from several virtues: respect, kindness, restraint, and empathy, to name a few. As detailed, polite individuals are not just passive observers of etiquette. They actively embody practices that elevate their interactions, making the world around them a little brighter and more harmonious. From active listening to refraining from judgment, these behaviors reflect internal character and a testament to the conscious choices one makes daily. As society becomes increasingly polarized and, at times, tumultuous, the role of polite people stands out starkly as beacons of decency and civility.

Their actions of polite people remind us that treating others respectfully and kindly isn’t old-fashioned. Indeed, it’s timeless. Embracing and practicing politeness is an investment in personal growth and nurturing a more compassionate and understanding world.

Science Explains 15 Health Benefits of Almond Milk

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Almond milk is more than a substitute for dairy milk in your diet. The dairy-free alternative allows vegans, vegetarians, and those with lactose intolerance and allergies to enjoy a milk-like beverage or use it in their recipes. Can it be more than that?

Yes. It’s more than a substitute.

Due to almond milk benefits, it has a place in nearly everyone’s diet. Whether you buy it ready-made at the grocery store or make it yourself, you should consider making a full switch or supplementing some of your dairy consumption for increased health benefits.

What is Almond Milk?

You can make your own, or you can buy it ready-made in the supermarket aisles. While there’s nothing wrong with making your own, many people prefer the convenience, flavors, or constant consistency. Plus, you’ll need to supplement or fortify it yourself.

Plant-based milk replaces dairy in most recipes without issues. This includes in sauces, baked goods and smoothies. You can also enjoy it on cereal or plain in a glass.

Almond milk benefits aren’t limited to drinking it. You can use it as part of your hair and skin care regimen too.

How to Buy Almond Milk

You should choose unsweetened, organic almond varieties for the most benefits and leave the sweetened or flavored varieties for special occasions. They tend to contain more preservatives and sugar. If you’re looking to lose or maintain your weight, the added sugar increases your calories despite the sweetened versions still containing around or fewer than 1% milk.

15 Almond Milk Benefits Backed by Science

1. Great Source of Vitamin E

Did you know one glass of almond-based milk contains roughly 50% of your daily-recommended intake? Did you know vitamin E is an antioxidant and shields your skin from sun damage? It does more than protect you from damaging rays.

Vitamin E benefits

• Combats inflammation
• Reduces bodily stress
• Boosts brain health
• Protects against heart disease
• Protects against cancer
• Might protect bones
• Might protect eyes
• Might combat Alzheimer’s disease

Your normal glass of cow’s milk contains no vitamin E. Even by swapping out one serving of your dairy milk, you can enjoy many of the increased vitamin E benefits (1).

2. Might Lower Your Risk of Heart Disease

Scientists have linked a lower risk of heart disease with diets rich in nuts and unsaturated fats (2). Almond milk contains both, including oleic acid, which can have beneficial changes to your blood lipids (3).

One study found a correlation between lowered bad cholesterol and triglycerides, increased good cholesterol, and almonds.

3. Lower Calories

Unsweetened almond milk contains 39 calories per serving; although, this number can vary between brands. If you’re counting calories, you can save about 75 calories without sacrifice to taste or texture.

In this study, researchers saw decreases in waist circumference, BMI, weight, and hip circumference from swapping one dairy product serving with almond-based milk.

It’s suitable for many special diets and programs since it’s also low in carbohydrates and fat and contains moderate protein. If you’re purchasing ready-made, you’ll also find fortified varieties that decrease nutrient and vitamin differences.

Homemade varieties will vary, depending on how much water you use to dilute it. However, for low-carb and higher protein/fat diets, you will have more control over your macronutrients without preservatives and sweeteners. The same applies to taste and consistency if weight loss or control aren’t important to you.

4. Doesn’t Spike Blood Sugar

Unsweetened almond milk benefits include a low G.I. due to its higher fat and protein counts versus its low carbohydrate number. Whether you’re a diabetic or following a low carbohydrate lifestyle, it might be the better choice over cow’s milk (5).

5. Might Prevent Bone Related Injuries and Disease

Almonds don’t contain a large amount of calcium; however, fortified ready-made milks do contain about 25% of your daily recommended dose of calcium per serving. That’s almost twice the amount of calcium as you’ll find in low fat cow’s milk.

Women are more susceptible to bone loss as they age. Because calcium plays a major role in reducing osteoporosis, you can lower your risk by drinking calcium fortified almond-based milk (6).

6. You Might Lose Weight

Full of healthy fats and low in calories, you might lose weight if you change your dairy options. A study showed a reduction in both weight and waist and hip circumference, which the CDC, FDA, and USDA consider significant markers for overall health and risk than weight alone.

7. Low Potassium and Phosphorus

If you have chronic kidney disease, your doctor has warned you against consuming cow’s milk. The same goes for people who have heart disease, certain bone diseases, and hyperparathyroidism. The potassium and phosphorus build up in the blood to dangerous levels, and the risks are death, heart attack, and irregular heartbeat.

Almond-based milk contains a fraction of phosphorus and potassium compared to cow’s milk(7).

8. Fiber

Almond milk boasts both soluble and insoluble fiber, both of which your body needs to maintain healthy digestion. The fiber also regulates sugar absorption, controls cholesterol, keeps you fuller, and protects your intestines and colon.

9. Might Prevent Age-related Eye Disease

Vitamin E, when taken in conjunction with vitamin C, beta-carotene, and zinc, might protect you from macular degeneration and cataracts. This is the most common cause of age-related blindness. Because many have been fortified with the other vitamins, it makes it a good choice to add to your preventative measures.

10. Might Slow Alzheimer’s Disease

Vitamin E passes to the brain according to this study. It offers a glimmer of hope for caregivers and those with early stages of Alzheimer’s disease.

More research is needed, but scientists are looking at correlations to Alzheimer’s as a way to slow progression and protect the brain. One long-term study shows promising preliminary results.

11. Controls Blood Sugar

Diabetics tend to have low to below normal levels of magnesium, which helps control hunger and blood sugar via reducing insulin resistance. In theory, it might be beneficial to you if you’re already at risk for diabetes, too.

Non-diabetics can still see the same benefits of lower insulin resistance, including appetite suppression, from the magnesium.

12. Healthy, Glowing Skin

While some sites tell you to use almond-based milk directly on your skin, you can reap almond milk benefits from drinking it. It’s suitable for all skin types. According to FitDay, you can expect anti-aging benefits from the high vitamin E content.

almond milk for glowing skin

However, what does the science say? Vitamin E, such as you consume in an almond-based milk, is responsible for repairing your damaged skin and protecting it from further damage from daily things like sun exposure, cigarette smoke, and pollution. Unfortunately, more research is needed, but it’s a natural product with no side effects and might be worth trying in conjunction with your current routine.

13. Might Combat PMS and Menstrual Symptoms

Vitamin E does more than promote healthy skin; it also restores natural balance to hormones, specifically prolactin. This hormone is responsible for mood swings, acne, bloating, and cramps.

During PMS and menstruation, your hormones are off kilter. It’s these hormones that are responsible for the symptoms women feel, so by restoring the balance or preventing them from going off balance, you could essentially have an almost symptom-free period since menopause is the only true cure.

Most studies speak about supplement forms of vitamin E, but because almond-based milks contain high amounts of it, you might see benefits from including it in your diet.

14. Vitamin B-12

Many brands do fortify their almond-based milk with upwards of 50% of the B-12 daily recommended value. For anyone following a plant-based diet, you’re most likely taking a supplement form or receiving it from a fortified cereal of this essential nutrient. It is one of the top ten sources, and it’s also suitable for daily use on low-carb or low fat diets.

Why is B12 important?

Deficiency leads to anemia, which can cause many symptoms from exhaustion to balance problems to cognitive issues.

Conditions such as celiac and Crohn’s disease can cause absorption issues with vitamin B-12, putting you at a greater risk for anemia. If you suffer from these conditions, you should consult with your doctor to first check your levels to rule out deficiency.

If you’re over the age of 50, you’re more likely to develop diet-based anemia as well since your stomach acid production and absorption lowers. You might require more from your food sources, and it might benefit you since your calorie intake raises minimally from a single serving.

15. Might Decrease Allergies if Consumed During Pregnancy

According to a Danish study, contrary to what some might think, if you consume known allergen foods during pregnancy, your baby is less likely to be allergic or develop an allergy to the foods. The study included common allergens, including tree nuts.

Final Thoughts on Almond Milk

Many people will see benefits from swapping to almond milk, and few concerns exist when using an unsweetened variety. The taste and texture are slightly different, but you’re unlikely to notice the difference in recipes or on top of cereal if you’re already used to low-fat milk. Almond milk benefits are both plentiful and scientifically sound.

It’s a suitable beverage for vegans, vegetarians, and those with intolerances and allergies to dairy as it provides your body with essential nutrients, such as vitamin E and, if fortified, calcium and B-12.

You can make it yourself at home with water, almonds, and a blender or food processor. This is essential for anyone looking to control the consistency and additives or who is using their own sweeteners and flavorings at home.

You have little to lose by trying almond-based milks, and you have many healthful benefits to gain. You’ll be hard-pressed to find another readily available, affordable, and easily adaptable source of vitamin E. What are you waiting for?

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

5 Ways to Tell Women They’re Attractive (Without Talking About Sex)

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Just like men, women like to get compliments. According to a study in the journal PLOS One, a compliment can give any person a positive boost that may be akin to getting a monetary reward. However, it can be tricky for a man to tell a woman that they are attractive.

In these days of the #MeToo movement, a compliment may be easily seen as insensitive and disrespectful to women. When done the wrong way, letting the woman know you think she’s attractive might send a message that her beauty is just for consumption and pleasure and that nothing else about her matters.

So, here are some ways to tell someone that they are attractive without demeaning the person.

Here Are 5 Ways To Tell Someone They’re Attractive, Without Talking About Sex

“The secret of attraction is to love yourself. Attractive people judge neither themselves nor others.” – Deepak Chopra

1.    Be chill about it and have good timing

Approaching a woman to tell her she’s attractive might not seem a chill thing to do. The unexpected gesture could flatter her. But on the other hand, you could be interrupting someone who’s got a list of things to do for the day, and talking to a stranger isn’t one of them.

You could also potentially make the woman uncomfortable even if you only want to express your admiration. According to a sociologist via Huffington Post, making a someone uncomfortable by encroaching on her space borders on human rights infringement and it could be dehumanizing.

So, resist the urge to say something corny (and potentially offensive) when trying to talk to a woman. Don’t attempt a complicated pick-up line or pull off a shallow gimmick. Some men behave in odd ways when they approach a woman to cover up for their nervousness. But women can easily sense a man who’s being dishonest. You surely don’t want to risk coming off offensive in this day and age.

The best thing you can do is to be normal so you can relax. Even if you have to pretend, try regarding her as an old acquaintance you haven’t seen since college. This might help you feel more comfortable chatting with ease.

A few pointers

  • Try to create a rapport first so that you’ll have a more pleasant conversation and obtain a positive outcome.
  • If you’re in the bar, maybe start by asking her about her drink or talk about the general vibe of the place.
  • Always be aware of the importance of good timing when approaching a woman to tell her she’s attractive.
    • Observe what she’s doing first. Is she having a deep conversation with someone else at the bar? Is she furiously texting on her phone? Does she keep making calls? Does she look distracted or harried?

Approaching a stranger who’s preoccupied might not be a good move in any situation. Even if you’re on your best behavior and she finds you interesting, she might not be able to carry on a conversation properly if she has to keep calling work or texting a friend in crisis.

2.    Consider the delivery and context.

The reality is you can tell a girl she’s attractive without being creepy and awkward. It all depends on the delivery and context of your approach. The key is not to be vulgar or put the woman in an embarrassing and defensive position. You want this encounter to be a positive one and not the kind of stuff talked about and judged on social media.

So, always exercise tact when approaching a woman to tell her she’s attractive. Don’t compliment her around plenty of people who can hear what you say. Don’t honk your car horn at her and shout, “Hey lady, you’ve got a fine a**!” In case you have not heard, catcalling a woman is never a compliment. It is considered harassment, plain and simple, according to the National Organization for Women.

Keep in mind:

  • The direct approach of telling a woman she’s attractive might not work, especially if you’re going to chat with a stranger.
  • If your first words to her are “I think you’re beautiful,” she’ll likely turn and run as far and quickly as possible.
  • So, the best method is to let her know that she’s attractive in a subliminal way.
  • The art of flirting is very important in this situation. If she feels safe around you, she might well take your lead and flirt back.

For instance, if you’re already deep in the conversation with her and having a laugh, you could just blurt out, “I love how your eyes squint when you laugh!” Or, if the woman is someone you always run into at work but have never really gotten to know better yet, you could try giving her a compliment about what she’s wearing. Try, “That outfit really suits you!”

Now, if you’ve reached a more comfortable level in your acquaintance with her or if you’ve been out on a couple of friendly dates, perhaps you can send her a text out of the blue and profess your attraction. Write, “I just want to let you know that I think you’re stunning.” And then leave it at that.

3.    Choose your words carefully.

If you like a girl, don’t choose words like “hot” or “sexy” to tell her she’s attractive. Definitely don’t use the word “bangin” because that might land you in real trouble (especially if this woman is a co-worker). If you have to dish a pick-up line, don’t describe her feminine physical assets because that is sleazy and disrespectful. You’ll likely get a (well-deserved) slap on the face if you try to objectify her.

  • Complimenting a woman for her looks might come off as needy for some guys.
  • Words like “hot” and “sexy” have sexual undertones so men shouldn’t try to pull this off.
  • Save the sensual stuff for getting intimate later on in your relationship. Instead, use words like “pretty” and “cute” and you will likely get a positive reaction.
  • The key is to use words that are complimentary but not objectifying.
  • Sound earnest with your non-sensual compliments as well.
  • Unless you’re already a couple or have seen each other a few times, even innocent words might come off like a harassment. If it does not feel right, then it’s better not to say it.

Sometimes, you don’t have to use descriptive words at all. For instance, if she’s done talking, don’t respond first but hold her gaze and maintain eye contact and say, “I’m sorry, I’m having a hard time focusing when I look at you,” and then divert back to the conversation.

Women are also into details so rather than saying outright that she’s beautiful, try specifically making a comment on her face, her eyes, her makeup, and her clothes. You could say, “That blouse really goes well with the color of your eyes.”

4.    Don’t make a big deal out of it.

As soon as the compliment is out, don’t pay much attention to it or make it seem important. It should not be a big deal if she does not respond to the compliment or if she acted as if what you told her went over her head.

Downplaying a compliment is a natural reaction for women. According to a study in the journal Language in Society, only 22 percent of women accept or acknowledge a compliment. For this reason, don’t expect her to say thank you to what you’ve said and don’t demand it either. Understand, it’s not a rejection when a woman doesn’t say anything after being told that she looks nice. Women are just wired this way.

The study also cited that most women don’t respond well to compliments for fear of being seen as too confident or cocky. In some cases, downplaying a compliment can be a cultural thing too. A woman might also have been raised in a household where they are supposed to act meek when being complimented.

So, don’t take it personally if it looks like she didn’t notice or hear you say you think she’s attractive. Trust that she got the message loud and clear even if she won’t show it.

5.    Be self-aware, not self-conscious.

When you are self-conscious, you become too worried about what you’re doing and start to sweat bullets. You end up acting awkward or making moves that completely pull her away from you. But when you’re self-aware, you basically know how you’re coming across. This means that you’re also aware:

  • Whether she’s comfortable and at ease with you.
  • If you’re seated or positioned well, instead of encroaching on her space.
  • If there’s decent distance between you.
  • Whether other people are looking in your direction.

attractive

Being aware of these things are important because it’s a way for you to test the boundaries if you’re trying to flirt with her. Apart from your words, you can also tell a woman she’s attractive with your body language.

Does she flinch or does she move closer when you lightly touch her arm or hair or put a hand on the small of her back? Do you notice her lean toward you when you talk to her or pull away? Does she tilt her head when you talk? Does she have her purse in front of her like a wall?

If you’re observant about these things, you could be emboldened to let her know how you really feel about her not just in words but also in your gestures.

Final Thoughts On Ways To Tell Someone They’re Attractive

In an ideal world, there should be nothing wrong when a man tells a woman she’s attractive. It’s part of a human’s need to find a mate in life. But in today’s social landscape, a man has to consider a lot of things before blurting out the words that show his attraction to get a positive result.

These days, there’s a fine line between giving women compliments and offending or harrassing them. When the words are said properly and with the right timing, any person will appreciate the praises. But when the wrong words are said, it could come back to bite the person who said it.

A man who respects women will act with foresight, poignancy, and sincerity. He will not come across as a guy whose only agenda is to bed the woman on their first meeting. Respecting and considering a woman’s feelings and comfort level is vital if you want to take a relationship any further.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WeJ8dXDZUcA

Beauty Expert Explains 15 All Natural Ways to Remove Blackheads

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Acne is a skin infection that affects nearly 50 million people in the United States. A blackhead is defined as a feature of mild acne that can form on your face, shoulders, back, cheat, neck, and arms.

A blackhead is classified as a small lesion that appears on your skin when your skin’s pores are clogged. They can be clogged with either dead skin or excess oils that glands beneath your skin create, called sebum.

Overall, blackheads can be avoided by doing a multitude of actions, such as avoiding oil-based and alcohol skin products and always cleansing your skin. Although extra measures can be taken to avoid blackheads, they can still form and they can be difficult to get rid of. But you’re in luck because there are natural ways to remove blackheads on your skin without using harmful chemicals.

15 Natural Ways to Remove Blackheads

 

1. Baking Soda

Baking soda is a chemical compound that has antiseptic qualities that exfoliate your skin and eliminate blackheads. Baking soda has the ability to scrub away dead skin cells, and it offers many other benefits for your skin, such as the ability to neutralize your skin’s pH balance and the ability to encourage your skin to produce less oil.

How to Use It

 

  • Mix 1 tablespoon of baking soda and water until a thick paste forms
  • Apply paste to your blackheads
  • After 15 mintues, rinse the mixture off of your face

2. Oatmeal

Oatmeal is a porridge that’s usually made from rolled oat grain, and it has the capability of cleansing your skin and loosening your pores. Since it loosens your pores, it allows the clogged debris inside your pores to easily come out. Oatmeal is also responsible for soothing irritated skin and removing dead skin cells from your skin, which contribute to the accumulation of black heads.

How to Use It

 

  • Cook oatmeal following directions on container, using distilled water
  • Let the oatmeal sit for a few minutes
  • Apply the oatmeal to your face and let sit for 20 minutes
  • Rinse the oatmeal off and moisturize

3. Honey

Honey is great for clearing blackheads on your skin because it contains both antibacterial and antiseptic properties that have the ability to remove blackheads in addition to the impurities in your skin that cause black heads. Honey also has the ability to tighten and hydrate your pores, which gives your skin great complexion.

How to Do It

 

  • Heat up honey by putting the jar in a warm bowl of water
  • Apply warm honey to your blackheads and let sit for 15 minutes
  • Rinse the honey off and moisturize

4. Egg Whites

Aside from the cooking benefits that they offer, egg whites benefit your skin in multiple ways including the ability to benefit your skin tone, to tighten your skin, and to remove blackheads. Not only this, but egg whites also have the ability to prevent blackheads from occurring in the future.

How to Use It

 

  • Separate egg whites from yolks
  • Apply egg whites to your blackheads
  • Place toilet paper on top of egg whites
  • Let mixture dry and repeat
  • Once the mask is dry, peel it off and rinse your face

5. Sugar

Although sugar is unhealthy for your body’s consumption, it acts as a great exfoliant for your skin to remove blackheads. When sugar is added to a carrier oil, it has the ability to remove blackheads from any area on your skin. Removing blackheads by using sugar also gives your skin many other benefits.

How to Use It

 

  • Mix 1 cup of sugar with carrier oil
  • Rub mixture onto your blackheads and massage into pores
  • Rinse mixture off and moisturize

6. Apple Cider Vinegar

Apple Cider Vinegar is a vinegar that’s made from fermented apple juice, and it contains acetic acids that are known for their ability to eliminate and break down tough skin. Not only this, but apple cider vinegar also has the ability to restore the pH levels of your skin, preventing blackheads from occurring in the future.

How to Use It

There are multiple ways to use apple cider vinegar to remove a blackhead, but the most popular way is by using the vinegar as a face wash in the mornings. Apply the liquid to your face by blotting it with a tissue, and then rinse your face with warm water afterwards.

7. Clay Mask

Clay masks are a great way to remove blackheads because they harden and allow the debris inside your pores to harden to the substance. The most popular type of clay mask in removing a blackhead is bentonite clay because it contains a variety of beneficial minerals for your skin and it’s extremely absorbent.

How to Use It

 

  • Mix 1 tablespoon of clay and water to form a thick paste
  • Apply paste to blackheads and let sit for 25 minutes
  • Rinse the mask off and moisturize

8. Salt and Besan Powder

Salt and besan powder is great for clearing blackheads from your skin because besan powder is a type of gram flour, which is known for its ability to treat infections and reduce acne. Salt and besan powder mixed together have the ability to treat blackheads effectively because they both prevent your skin from producing excess oils, which is what ultimately contributes to blackhead formation.

How to Use It

 

  • Mix 1 tablespoon of besan powder with 2 tablespoons of milk and 1 tablespoon of salt
  • Apply the thick paste to blackheads
  • Let dry for 15 minutes and rinse

9. Turmeric

Turmeric is a ginger-powder that is often used in cooking, and it contains antioxidant properties that are great for your skin. Turmeric has the ability to remove blackheads, and since it often stains your skin, you’re advised to use the non-edible spice.

How to Use It

 

  • Mix non-edible turmeric with water to form a paste
  • Apply paste to blackheads and let sit for 15 mintues
  • After 15 mintues, rinse the mixutre off and moisturize your face

10. Epsom Salt

Epsom salt is an inorganic type of salt that has the ability to remove your blackheads. Additionally, it also has the ability to remove dead skin cells and excess oil from your skin.

How to Use It

 

  • Mix 1 tablespoon of Epsom salt and a half cup of hot water
  • Add 4 drops of iodine to the mixture
  • After the mixture is combined, apply it to the affected areas of your face
  • Massage the mixture into your pores and then rinse afterwards

11. Lemon Juice

Lemon juice contains citric acids that are known for their ability to remove dead skin excess oils from your face. Not only this, but lemon juice also has the ability to unclog your pores, eliminating and preventing blackheads from forming on your face.

How to Use It

 

  • Add 1 teaspoon of lemon juice into a bowl
  • Apply the lemon juice to your face with a cotton ball
  • Allow the juice to dry for 10 mintues
  • Rinse the liquid off and moisture your face

12. Salicylic Acid

Salicylic acid is a chemical acid that is designed to treat acne and other skin impurities. It has the ability to unclog your pores and even remains on your skin afterwards to prevent future blackheads.

How to Use It

You can purchase salicylic acid at any pharmacy or grocery store and apply it to the affected areas of your face. Make sure to moisturize afterwards to prevent dry skin.

13. Green Tea

Green tea is made from a unfermented leaves and is usually found in tea bags. It provides your skin with a variety of vitamins and antioxidants that can not only remove acne and blackheads, but it also prevents them from occurring in the future.

How to Use It

 

  • Boil 1 cup of water and place 2 tea bags into the cup
  • After letting soak for 1 hour, pour the liquid into a bowl to cool off
  • Apply the liquid to your face and let it dry for 10 mintues
  • After 10 mintes, rinse the liquid off

14. Toothpaste

Toothpaste not only has the capability of cleansing your mouth of bacteria, but it also has the ability to cleanse your pores of bacteria and oils. By removing excess oils and bacteria from your skin, toothpaste removes and prevents blackheads from forming.

How to Use It

 

  • Apply a small amount of toothpaste to the affected area of your skin
  • Let the toothpaste dry for 20 mintues
  • Rinse the paste off and moisturize your face

15. Tea Tree Oil

Tea tree oil is oil that contains antibacterial and anti-inflammatory ingredients that are known for their ability to remove blackheads and reduce acne on your skin. They are known for unblocking the glands in your face that trap excess oils.

Remove Blackheads

How to Use It

 

  • Mix a few drops of tea tree oil with apple cider vinegar and water
  • Spray the mixture onto your face
  • Moisturize your face

Overall, blackheads can be difficult to remove and prevent from occurring again. But they’re not 100% avoidable and studies show that every single person will experience at least a few blackheads in their lifetime.

Following the natural methods above to rid your skin of clogged pores can be beneficial and can even work for varieties of skin types. But there are countless more ways to get rid of blackheads.

Ultimately, keep your face clean and cleanse it before you go to bed at night in addition to when you wake up in the morning. Avoid touching your face throughout the day and always wash your hands. Blackheads are going to make their appearance, but they can be removed if your skin is taken care of properly using the natural methods above.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YeKgaiwOtXo

11 Traits of A Woman You’ll Never Forget

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Have you ever met the woman of your dreams whose traits check all the boxes? Sometimes, this woman appears at the most unexpected moment and the most inconvenient time in your life but she could change your life forever.

Clearly, if she has made an impact on you then she’s not going to be easy to forget. But if she popped in your life when the time is right, then the universe has blessed you with finding this rare woman. Do yourself a favor by recognizing her amazing traits and never, ever letting her go.

NOTE: If you want to know the traits of an unforgettable man, please check out our separate article on that topic.

Here Are The 11 Traits Of A Woman Who Will Be Very Hard To Forget

“Authentic feminity is a combination of class, tenderness, and virtue. When a woman possesses these traits, a man will naturally want to be more of a gentleman around her.” – Jason Evert

1.    She has a positive outlook on life

You’ll never forget a woman whose best traits include having a positive outlook on life. If she’s someone who always sees the glass as half full, you’re likely going to be touched and inspired by her optimism.

  • People who are positive will always leave a good impression. They will be motivating and encouraging compared to those who see the glass as half empty.
  • Experts say that if you spend more time with negative people, you will also turn out like them because you’ll adopt their mental state.
  • You may also be risking your physical health if you stay with a negative person in your life.

According to a study in the journal American Academy of Neurology, cynical and negative people develop diseases faster than positive people, so for your health and sanity’s sake, stick with a positive person.

2.    She is honest about her feelings

A man will never forget a woman who’s honest about her feelings and perceptions in life. Even if this honesty means showing her displeasure, frustrations, and anger, the men will appreciate her for being authentic about it even more, according to experts from Florida State University.

  • Apparently, it’s this honesty that men look for in a long-term relationship.
  • They appreciate a woman who wears her heart on her sleeve and who doesn’t have any pretensions or put-ons.
  • Men want a woman who will be upfront about what’s really bothering her and not someone who’ll give subtle hints and make him guess if something is wrong. (This will just drive the guys crazy but not in a positive way.)

3.    She’s smarter than her partner

A smart woman will be more unforgettable and stimulating than a gorgeous woman because she can challenge you intellectually.

  • Beauty fades, as you may already know, but when you have a woman who provokes your mind, your mental faculties are always sharpened.
  • You will also not run out of interesting stuff to talk about so life with her would be very enriching.
  • Although it’s common for people to say that women should act dumb around men, the truth is that guys aren’t really superficial. They will be impressed by a woman’s mind as much as her physical beauty.

A study in the University of Aberdeen revealed that men who end up marrying a woman who’s smarter than them end up living longer. Perhaps the saying is true that “Behind every great man is a greater woman.”

4.    She has a kind and nurturing heart

You won’t forget a woman with a kind and nurturing heart. These characteristics are generally the mark of a good person. If she’s not kind-hearted, she will not likely make a great impact on your life. Worse yet, she could give you trauma that you won’t be able to shake off.

Experts say that men have craved for nurturing women since the beginning of time. But with today’s conveniences, it’s not always easy to find this trait in modern women. This doesn’t mean, however, that men aren’t looking for this.

Some people associate a kind and nurturing personality to having a maternal instinct. However,  even if a woman can’t physically bear children, she can still develop this natural response to those close to her, according to National Geographic.

5.    She can be loads of fun and game for doing crazy stuff

It’s hard to forget a woman who doesn’t take herself seriously. What is not to love about a person who can also laugh at herself? People will likely want to be in her company if she’s game for some fun and won’t back down when asked to join in something crazy.

  • She’s willing to take risks because she lives her life to the fullest.
  • She’s not afraid to try things or go off the edge especially if she knows you are there to support her.
  • Women who have a good sense of humor and a playful quality are seen as non-aggressive types so it’s not surprising that men would want to stick around them.
  • The fact that they embrace childlike wonder about life makes them ideal for long-term relationships, according to the American Journal of Play.

6.    She’s an independent woman

A woman who is able to enjoy time alone and who values the pursuit of her own pleasures and goals is a woman who loves her independence. She can be in partnership with a man but still have a good life of her own. She doesn’t need a man but she still enjoys the company of men. Can you see the difference?

  • An independent woman has her own identity, her own sets of interests, and her own group of friends.
  • She works hard for her goals but she’s not bitter toward men.
  • If she has a partner, she supports his goals and pushes him to find his own identity and interests, too.

This is the kind of woman who’s established, mature, and secure about who she is and what she wants. It shows the strength of her character.

7.    She makes you feel like you are home

You won’t forget a woman who makes you feel that you belong. Being around her is so comforting and soothing that it’s like you’re always home. If there’s no other place you’d rather be than with her, it’s hard to let go of this kind of person.

If she gives you contentment, you’ll feel more positive every day. A woman like this will give your life order and a sense that everything has fallen into place.

8.    She compromises and makes things work

A woman who’s willing to compromise and adjust is hard to forget because life with her is about making things work. These days, it’s not easy to find someone who puts forth an effort to make it work.

A woman who is willing to compromise makes a great relationship partner because she’s willing to set aside her ego, as well as her own wants and needs, for the good of the partnership. How lucky are you to have a person like this in your life, who won’t give up at the slightest problem!

Disagreements and arguments are inevitable if you’re trying to remain in a committed relationship with another person. But if she’s willing to compromise, chances are she will influence you too. It’s hard to forget a woman who can compel you to make the right choices that will positively impact another person.

9.    She’s strong but feminine

She’s a strong woman in a sense that nothing will dampen her spirit or ruin her passion. She might demand equality but she will also acknowledge that men should woo and please the ladies once in a while.

The true strength of an unforgettable woman is in her ability to embrace her femininity despite her accomplishments and her intelligence.

  • She can be soft but still powerful.
  • She’s practical as well as spiritual.
  • She can be nice but she’s also tough.

Women with these qualities are rare; it’s hard to forget about them if they have touched your life.  Men won’t forget a girl who’s strong enough not to put up with their nonsense.

10. She’s accepting of your flaws

Finding a woman who’s accepting of your flaws is like winning the jackpot. How can you forget a woman who will love you for who you are? It’s this kind of a person who’s in it for the long haul and who’s serious about making a lasting commitment.

It’s a choice and a sacrifice to stay in a relationship. It takes hard work to make a union work between two flawed human beings. If she has seen you at your worst and still wants to be with you, you know that this woman genuinely cares for and loves you. So, forgetting and letting go of this woman would be a big mistake.

11. She’s forgiving

According to the Journal of Behavioral Medicine, being forgiving is the secret to long life and good health. If a person chooses to be accepting of her partner’s flaws and mistakes, and still loves unconditionally, she can actually live longer.

forgiving woman

So, if you find a woman who has a forgiving heart and who doesn’t bear grudges, you’ll likely remember her. What is more, it would make sense to never let her go. This is a keeper. Your life will be a lot better if you have a partner who’s able to forgive you and your imperfections.

Final Thoughts On Traits Of A Woman You’ll Never Forget

The uniqueness of a human being is what makes the search for that perfect mate challenging but also interesting. For decades, scientists have been trying to study the behaviors of humans who fall in love, find a partner, and commit to a long-term relationship.

While every man has a different standard, these 11 traits in a woman could help it make it easier for you to recognize and find your true love. When you see these traits in the woman you’re dating then you have a positive chance of making the relationship last.

Now, it’s not easy to spot this great personality with just one date. You have to put yourself out there; mingle, date, and also do your part to make the relationship work. If she’s the woman who brings light to your life because she has all these qualities, don’t make the mistake of taking her for granted.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FnJLrAQrzjw

How To Beat Adrenal Fatigue (Without Medicine)

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Preventive and positive health advocates prefer to stop disease before it becomes a problem. In this article we will show you how to beat adrenal fatigue without the use of medicine for your proactive adrenal health. From a holistic wellness view, stress – which we can experience both mentally and physically – important hormones, and the adrenal glands are all connected.

The concept of adrenal fatigue is controversial in medical research. The term is a relatively new one; it encompasses a group of symptoms and bodily dysfunctions. The brain and the adrenal glands are linked together, so a medical problem with the adrenal glands can be rooted in either place.

This dual location of adrenal function brings up another controversy: the debate over which comes first, stress or adrenal fatigue. Does stress in the mind cause the adrenal gland to be unhealthy or does an unhealthy adrenal gland cause us to feel the emotion of stress?

What is adrenal fatigue?

Adrenal fatigue is a term for the symptoms that occur when your adrenal gland function is less than optimal. What happens in the body when the adrenal gland is not functioning properly? A lot of major bodily functions are impacted. Adrenal glands are responsible for around 50 different hormone chemicals that the body needs.

The adrenal glands are responsible for some very important bodily functions:

  • Regulation of blood pressure
  • Activating the stress response
  • Burning fat and proteins
  • Controlling blood sugar
  • Coordinating with the HPA axis (more on this later)
  • Producing cortisol

You can imagine that disrupting just one of these functions, like how you process blood sugar, for example, can have a wide range of negative health affects for the whole body. This short list of adrenal gland functions, and the vast health problems that can result, illustrates how challenging it would be to list all of the symptoms that can indicate a problem with adrenal fatigue.

Adrenal gland 101

When necessary, the brain sends a signal to the adrenal gland to start functioning more. This usually happens when you wake up in the morning to jump start your day. Functional Medicine Practitioner Dr. William Cole says, “The adrenal glands, which sit on top of your kidneys like little kidney baseball caps, release several important hormones, one of which is cortisol.” Cortisol is your “revving up” hormone for when you have to get things done, or when you face a stressful event.

Dr. Cole adds that it is more of an issue with the brain than with the adrenal glands when a person suffers from adrenal fatigue, stating, “Typically, adrenal fatigue is when the brain-adrenal (HPA) axis isn’t working so well.” This particular dysfunction of the HPA axis can result in an incorrect level of cortisol being released. For instance, the gland may release low amounts of cortisol when when it should be producing higher levels of this hormone.

When adrenal glands continue to produce cortisol under stressful conditions, the glands can grow depleted and therefore stop producing the cortisol that the brain is signaling the body to make. Basically these glands have become overworked and fatigued, and are asking for a day (or several days) off.

Symptoms of adrenal fatigue

Tiredness is another word for fatigue. If you are experiencing adrenal fatigue, you feel like there is not enough coffee in the world to give you the energy you need.

Read more in our article 8 Signs Of Adrenal Fatigue Most People Ignore

We have already mentioned that symptoms of adrenal fatigue are wide due to the many bodily functions that are affected from a low functioning adrenal gland.

Causes of adrenal fatigue

There are three possible causes of adrenal fatigue:

  • Heightened stress and activity for too long can cause adrenal fatigue.
    • The adrenal glands become tired of continuously producing excess cortisol and they begin to shut down production in protest.
  • Poor adrenal gland development as children is a possible cause of adult adrenal fatigue.
    • Researchers have found that a natural tendency toward adrenal fatigue and low cortisol levels may be inherited at birth when babies are born to parents of traumatic stress.
  • Degeneration of the adrenal glands as we age.
    • Decreasing function of adrenals due to immune system dysfunction is called Addison’s disease or primary adrenal insufficiency (PAI).
    • A tumor or disease of the adrenal glands can also result in degeneration.

Of these three, we obviously have the most control over stress reduction. We can also help our body by giving it nutrition and antioxidants to help it age as gracefully as possible and prevent disease.

Healing adrenal fatigue in the medical system versus healing without medicine

Positive people prefer to approach their health care and wellness without prescription medicine. The most common prescription for adrenal fatigue is cortisone and other corticosteroids that reduce various kinds of inflammation. The dosage of medicine prescribed may change depending on stress levels, illness, the need for surgery, or a medical emergency.

Medical professionals monitor your blood levels for hormones like cortisol to determine whether prescription medications are having the desired, positive result. Other medications may be prescribed based on the symptoms. Blood pressure medications and blood sugar control drugs are often prescribed, since these bodily functions are impacted by adrenal fatigue.

The holistic wellness options to beat adrenal fatigue without medicine include lifestyle changes, nutritional changes, and alternative wellness.

1.  Lifestyle changes to beat adrenal fatigue

Lifestyle changes are small actions that you can take to impact your health in a positive way. Here are a few healthy improvements you can make from day to day that should have a positive impact on your adrenal health:

  • Identify the sources of stress in your life.
  • Reduce stressors and time spent in stressful situations.
  • Make fewer commitments.
  • Decrease the amount of work you do in a day.
  • Take regular walks outside.
  • Try meditation.
  • Listen to and speak positive affirmations.
  • Use visualization techniques.
  • Exercise, specifically choosing calming yoga poses.
  • Build more down time into your schedule.
  • Eat whole vegan foods and eliminate added sugars.
  • Stay hydrated.

Changes to your life that remove triggers of stress and add relaxation are the goal. If walks outside cause you stress, then find a substitute activity that gets you in motion but fits your personality.

2. Nutritional remedies to beat adrenal fatigue

Does poor diet cause adrenal fatigue? No, but causing your body to be in a state of stress because it lacks proper nutrients won’t help beat adrenal fatigue either. Healthy vegan protein sources and vegetarian fare will provide your adrenal glands with necessary nourishment.

According to research on stress, cortisol production, and adrenal fatigue by 30-year clinical practitioner Dr. James Wilson, the following nutrients might provide optimal adrenal function:

  • B vitamins including:
    • Niacin (B3); 125–150 mg/day
    • Pyridoxine (B6); 50+ mg per day
    • Pantothenic acid; 1200–1500 mg/day
  • Vitamin C; 2500–4000mg/day
  • Bioflavonoids to help enhance the antioxidant power of Vitamin C
  • Magnesium (citrate); 400 mg before bedtime
  • Vitamin E (as mixed tocopherols)

Dr. Wilson also says that salt and salty foods are dietary additions you may want to add to increase adrenal function. Remember that reducing stress helps your adrenal gland function. Therefore, you can reduce stress caused by inadequate nutrition by choosing good vegan sources of protein and a wide variety of sources of vegetarian nutrients.

A healthy, balanced, and well-rounded diet will help your body get what it needs rather than starving it of vitamins and minerals. Seek advice from a nutrition professional if you need further guidance in achieving your health goals related to adrenal wellness.

Alternative medicine to beat adrenal fatigue

Herbal supplements and natural remedies may also be of help. Dr. James Wilson suggests some alternative methods that may work to beat adrenal fatigue and have the potential to “help balance HPA axis function, and promote evenness and calmness during the day, and sound sleep at night.”

  • Eleutherococcus senticosus root (Siberian Ginseng)
  • Ashwagandha root (Indian Ginseng)
  • Maca (Peruvian Ginseng)

Avoiding certain foods may also be a positive action step to beat adrenal fatigue without medicine. Licorice root has also been noted as a potential adrenal enhancer, but noted elsewhere in research as a food to avoid so we advise caution with licorice root. Grapefruit is also mentioned in research articles as a food to avoid for recovery from overstressed adrenal glands.

Acupuncture, massage, reiki, cranial sacral therapy, and other healing modalities that focus on a return to the natural energy flow and state of wellness for the body are also helpful alternative methods without the use of medicine to relieve stress.

adrenal fatigue

Final Thoughts on Ways to Beat Adrenal Fatigue

If you feel stress, it is likely that your adrenal glands could use some positive attention. In summary, you can provide your body and mind with superior vegan nutrition. Additionally, avoid sources of environmental and bodily stress and seek out what soothes your soul to beat adrenal fatigue.

Your adrenal glands will function better if you choose to pursue healing methods that support your wellbeing, because these will also support your optimal adrenal health.

Note: Always consult your wellness advocate before starting any new regimen.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXxTtXOz5JQ&t=9s

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