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15 Red Flags Someone is an Emotional Vampire

September 19, 2020 by Power of Positivity

If you’ve never dealt with an emotional vampire, you’re lucky. However, it could be that you don’t realize that a friend or loved one is like that. These types of people will drain you of your energy and emotions, and, to make matters worse, they won’t care.

For your health, it’s important to recognize when someone is an emotional vampire. Once you identify this energy zapper, learn to deal with them pleasantly while keeping them at arm’s length.

Know the fifteen signs someone might be an emotional vampire

Here are 15 red flags for which you should look.

1. They always turn the topic to themselves.

For some reason, no matter what you’re talking about, they’ll find a way to make it about themselves. Are you talking about your college grades? Somehow the conversation will turn in to how your scores affect them. What about a great date that you had yesterday? Yep, all about them.

If you’re feeling left out of a conversation with someone all the time, this is a significant, glaring indicator. This self-centered friend is incapable or possibly unwilling to allow someone else to be the center of attention in a conversation.

2. They always seek validation.

They probably have low self-esteem, so they require constant validation. The crazy thing is that you probably know this on some subconscious level, and you feel bad that they have low self-esteem. Therefore, you try to be friendly and supportive because you care.

They feed on this caring emotion from you. Indeed, they may even always fish for compliments. No matter how tiring this gets for you, they’ll continue to do it until you put a stop to it.

3. Emotional vampires thrive on and seek out drama.

Problems, negativity, and drama have a lot of energy. Energy suckers are naturally drawn to drama because it feeds their personality. Sometimes they may even go to extremes to instigate drama.

Continually seeking out drama is childish, but emotional vampires don’t see it that way. Instead, it’s a thrill to them. If you’re not careful, you can find yourself squarely in the middle of their drama simply because you’re associated with them.

4. They are emotionally unavailable.

If you think that your energy-sucking friend will be there for you when you need a shoulder to lean on, think again. They are selfish and emotionally unavailable. They will suck away all of everyone’s emotions, but they are unwilling to share when you need some.

Of course, they may be so wrapped up in themselves that if you tell them exactly how you’re feeling, they’ll dismiss it and change the subject to how they’re feeling. Even worse, they might make you feel bad that your bad feelings are making them feel bad. It’s a crazy cycle.

5. They always seem to have a negative vibe.

If you are a spiritual person, you may be able to detect people’s vibes when they come around. An emotional vampire will always project a negative vibe or aura. It can be so strong that it’s hard to ignore.

If you keep yourself around such a strong negative vibe, some of it may rub off onto you. Even the healthiest people might be slightly affected. The best thing you can do is stay away from people with negative vibes.

6. Every situation is always a crisis.

You may notice that your friend over-dramatizes every little thing. The most superficial problems that can easily be solved seems like the Titanic is about to sink again. What’s worse, it may seem that your friend is always having these minor-major issues.

People who suck up energy and emotions need to turn everything into a crisis so they can get more power and feelings out of you. It’s a vicious cycle in which you’ll continuously feed their needs until they wear down your last nerve.

7. They hold ridiculous grudges.

If your friend is holding grudges from elementary school, this is a big red flag. It seems that they can’t let anything go, ever. You can be sure that your friend will be holding grudges on their death bed.

This grudge-holding stems from their desire for drama all the time. If they forgive people, there will be no more drama. That means no more emotions for them to suck up, and they can’t have that.

8. They will complain about everything all the time.

It may seem like nothing is ever good enough for your friend. They have a problem with everyone and everything. They never have compliments or anything good to say.

Life can be very dull and harsh, being around a person who complains about everything. They’ll try to suck all of the joy out of whatever you’re doing so you’ll be as miserable as they are. If you’re a healthy person, you can fight against this, but it doesn’t make it any less irritating.

9. These friends seem to be unaware of others.

A person who is an emotional vampire doesn’t pay any attention to the fact that there are other human beings on the planet. They can happily go through life, never connecting with people, giving them credit for anything, or even recognizing that they have feelings and emotions.

Examples would be dismissing the excellent job that their waitress did or ignoring how their partner feels about them forgetting their anniversary. They can be cold, cruel, and seemingly heartless.

10. These folks never accept responsibility for their actions.

As much trouble as your friend can cause, they will never accept responsibility for their role in the drama. According to your friend, everything is everyone else’s fault. They play the victim role exceptionally well.

Even when it’s obvious that your friend is to blame, they will deflect that blame elsewhere. There is no reasoning with a person like this. You’ll only drive yourself crazy, trying to get them to see the light.

11. Emotional vampires continuously try to one-up you.

Unfortunately, they don’t just suck up negative energy. They suck up all energy. This means they want the power of being “the best” at all times. They won’t celebrate in your successes. Instead, they give you an empty compliment and immediately compare it to something they’ve done better than you. Here is an example.

“Oh, you finally lost that ten pounds? Great. Keep working at it, and you might be able to look as good as I would in that dress.”

It’s an empty compliment. This phrase is not a compliment (because they are incapable of giving real compliments). It’s just your friend trying to prove that they’re better than you.

12. They think that only their needs matter.

This makes sense because a person like this doesn’t pay any attention to people around them anyway. It’s almost like they live in a bubble, and they only pull you in long enough to drain your emotions. In their bubble, no one else’s needs matter.

Just keep in mind that if you keep this person as a friend, they’re not going to care about what’s happening in your life genuinely. They are more of a “surface” friend. They’re incapable of caring about your needs.

13. They are masters at guilt trips.

Emotional vampires seem to be skilled at making you feel guilty. They can even make you feel guilty about something that you had absolutely nothing to do with. Before you know it, you’ll be caving into what they want in an attempt to apologize for nothing.

Sometimes it can take a little time to recognize that they do this to you. However, when you realize it, get out of it. They’re not going to stop guilt-tripping you. It’s just who they are.

14. Emotional vampires are bullies.

People like your energy draining friend are unpleasant to be around. They have a nasty personality. They’re mean, selfish, insecure, and hostile. They are also bullies.

Bullying doesn’t work on everyone, but emotional vampires seem to have an innate quality that allows them to sense weaker people. They’ll bully these people into giving them what they want – energy and emotions.

15. Talks nonstop.

After reading the other fourteen red flags, it shouldn’t be surprising that all those energy suckers talk nonstop. If they don’t even acknowledge the people around them, it’s not going to occur to them that people have an opinion (or maybe they don’t care that people have an idea). To them, they are the only ones that exist or matter, so why would anyone else have anything to say?

They may rarely give you a chance to even reply to what they’re saying. Why? Because they don’t care what you think or how you feel.

Final Thoughts on Dealing with the Emotional Vampires in Your Life

Throughout this article, we’ve referred to the energy sucker in your life as your friend. However, let’s be honest. This person is not a friend. They’re a leech. They’re simply a parasite in your life feeding off of your energy and emotions. They’ll keep mooching off of you until there is nothing left, or until you put a stop to it.

Don’t allow emotional vampires to consume you. Use these 15 red flags to recognize them for who they are. Then cut them off and enjoy your life.

Family Therapist Explains 10 Ways to Win Over Your In-Laws

September 18, 2020 by Power of Positivity

Getting married is an exciting adventure filled with love and plenty of planning. One thing that the happy couple doesn’t prepare for is what it’s like to meet the in-laws. There have been movies made about the dreaded encounters when you meet your mother and father-in-law, and they learn that you will take the hand of their son or daughter. The good news is it makes for great movies and videos, but you can have a beautiful relationship with your family, and everyone can live in harmony. Now, it all comes down to the personality of each party and their views on things. Some people are easier to win over than others.

Not only can an awkward relationship with your love’s family cause you anxiety, but it also puts your partner in the middle of any disputes. Over the long-term, your partner will also suffer stress from this predicament.

10 Tips to Build an Excellent Relationship With Your In-Laws

If you want to have a good relationship with your in-laws and win them over from the start, here are some tips that can help you accomplish this task.

1. Respect Their Religious Beliefs

Whenever you join two families together, you are bringing different backgrounds, traditions, and beliefs. You must respect their family and their views, even if they don’t align with yours.
In some faiths, women wear caps over their heads as a covering. Here are some examples. In the Mormon faith, they don’t believe in drinking caffeine of any kind. In the Muslim faith, alcohol is a no-go.

It’s easy to see how just these three examples could bring about major conflict with some people. However, while you don’t have to live by their rules and regulations, you should follow them while you’re in their home. So if the family is against drinking, you shouldn’t bring a flask in for dinner.

These little gestures of kindness can have a significant impact on your relationship with your in-laws. Additionally, you want your husband or wife to feel that you have respect for their family, or it can cause a significant rift. Being positive about religious diversity will go a long way, according to studies.

2. Always Show Kindness

It would help if you treated your partner’s parents how you want your parents to be treated. Even if they step across the line or say inappropriate things, you want to make sure that you treat them with respect. It’s perfectly acceptable to say something like, “I respect and value your opinion, but we will have to agree to disagree.”

There’s no need to argue and fight when you can state your feelings and move on. This world would sure be a boring place if everyone had the same opinions.

3. Include The In-Laws When Appropriate

One of the things that cause rifts with the in-laws is they feel excluded. When a son or daughter starts spending time with a love interest, the family often feels left out. They may not be present at Sunday dinners anymore, or they may not be as readily available to help with household needs.

You will probably encounter a lot of ill feelings because you take him or her away from them. The vital thing to counteract these feelings is including them. If Sunday dinner is a big thing at their house, then make sure that you attend also.

Though it’s difficult, you need to make sure that you don’t cut off people that were so special just because you’re busy being in love. You will need those relatives one day, so it’s best to start on the right foot.

4. Be Up Front and Honest

Honesty will go a long way with your future relatives. It’s easy to want to embellish your accomplishments to put yourself in a brighter light. Frankly, who doesn’t want the family of their future husband or wife to think they are going places?

It would help if you remembered that the things you say could and will impact your relationship at some time. If you exaggerate your salary or social standing, eventually, they will know the truth. Dishonesty can cause you plenty of problems when it comes to your in-laws, so it’s best to stick to the facts and be truthful from the start.

5. Defend Them When They Feel Slighted

One way to get on your mother or father in-law’s right side is to come to their defense. According to research, family members care if others in the unit feel they receive justice. Even if it’s just in family arguments or disagreements with the cell phone company, you need to play their defender.

When you rush to their defense during times of adversity, it shows that you are rooting for them and on the same team. They will appreciate that you stand up for them, especially when it seems like they’re on the losing end.

6. Laugh at Their Jokes

Some new family members may try to win you over with levity. Even if they tell the dumbest jokes you’ve ever heard, and they are not remotely funny, you still need to laugh.

When you give them the pleasure of thinking they’re funny, it’s a form of bonding. They want someone who is not only going to treat their son or daughter properly but will also listen to what they have to say.

7. Keep Conversations Light

One of the biggest mistakes you can make with your future relatives is to delve into in-depth topics too soon. Never discuss politics or religion unless you have no choice. These two subjects have caused war and many violent encounters across the country, and the last thing you want to do is talk about such matters with the family.

Try to keep things neutral and positive. Please talk about the weather, sports, and your partner when they were a child. If you want to make a good impression, then don’t get into anything controversial.

8. Offer a Helping Hand to the In-Laws

If you want to butter up the in-laws, then you can offer to lend a helping hand. A mother loves nothing more than their soon to be daughter in law to help peel potatoes or do other mundane tasks.

Perhaps, they need a new light hung in the Livingroom as the old one is on the fritz. If you have electrical skills and can hang that light for them, they will bond instantly with you. Helping them doesn’t mean making them feel like they can’t do something for themselves.

You want to tread lightly because some people may find it offensive if you try to take over their home, and this is especially true about a woman in her kitchen. Make sure it’s known that you want to help and not take charge.

9. Become Interested in Family History

Every family has a story. They may be relatives of a famous person, or they may have some well-to-do millionaires that they are close too. When you are going to marry someone, you must know about their family.

Additionally, family members will like the fact that you seem interested in their clan. Therapists advise that there are always destructive dynamics that you want to steer clear of in every family. So you should learn as much as you can about their history.

10. At Least Consider Taking Their Last Name

The older generation is a bit more old-fashioned. It was always commonplace for the women to take the man’s name in marriage. However, millennials have changed things dramatically. These days, you can hyphenate your name, keep it the same, or the husband can take the wife’s name.

If you want to impress them and let them know that you love their family, you can at least consider changing your name to match theirs. They will respect the fact that you at least considered the possibility.

Final Thoughts: What Not to Say or Do to The In-Laws?

Now that you’ve learned all the things you should do to get in your new family’s good graces, there are a few things that you should avoid. Here are the top things to avoid when dealing with your in-laws.

1. Don’t talk about religion or politics.
2. Avoid Subjects about alcohol or your consumption.
3. Don’t criticize their parenting skills or offer suggestions.
4. Never put down their son/daughter’s ways to them.
5. Don’t call them mom or dad right away without being told it’s okay.
6. Never tell them they have a standing invitation to your home.
7. Avoid making them feel inferior to your family.
8. Don’t talk about your family’s finances or yours either.
9. Avoid discussion holiday schedules in advance.
10. Don’t let the relationship turn into a power struggle.
11. Keep your not-so-nice opinions to yourself.
12. Never discuss the not-so-savory circumstances you’ve faced.

Dealing with in-laws can be a nerve-wracking experience. You want to put your best foot forward and hope they like you. Remember, these are the people that you’re going to see on every holiday, birthday party, or other special occasions. You want to forge a good relationship with them even if you don’t like them.

No one says that you must be good friends with your relatives, but you must find ways to get along even if it’s just for your spouse’s sake. If you want to win these people over, then you must be cautious during your first few encounters.

11 Surprising Rosehip Oil Benefits for Your Skin

September 17, 2020 by Sarah Barkley

Rosehip oil has many benefits that will immediately make you want to add it to your skincare regime. As it gains popularity, more people wonder about rosehip oil’s benefits for the skin. Surprisingly, there are many, making it a beneficial ingredient for all areas of your skincare.

Rosehip oil, harvested from the seed of rose plants, contains vitamins, antioxidants, and fatty acids. These components are essential for skincare, giving you the beautiful skin you desire. You may have already noticed, but many skin care products in the store contain rosehip oil because of their beneficial properties.

Research shows that rosehip oil skin can reduce redness, slow aging, eliminate acne, and moisturize your skin. Many products claim to do these things, but dermatologists back rosehip oil, agreeing it is beneficial for skin care.

Your skin is your largest organ, and it protects all of your other organs. Considering this, taking care of your skin is essential to maintaining your overall health. Learn about the benefits of rosehip oil for the skin and implement it into your daily skincare routine.

What Is Rosehip Oil (and what is it good for)?

Rosehip oil gets extracted using a cold-press method from the crushed seeds of a wild rose plant called Rosa canina. The oil contains many nutritional benefits, including vitamins, antioxidants, and fatty acids.

While rose oil comes from the petals, rosehip oil comes from the seeds and fruit, which sit just below the rose. It is a light, unscented oil, making it ideal for skincare or mixed with other ingredients.

Rosehip oil is often used with essential oils as a carrier oil. Essential oils are sometimes too intense to put directly on your skin, but the rosehip oil dilutes it safely. Plus, using rosehip oil with essential oils can offer many more benefits than just using essential oils alone.

Eleven Benefits of Rosehip Oil for Skin

Let’s look at rose oil’s benefits for face and skin care.

1. Rosehip Oil Hydrates Your Skin

Your skin can lack hydration due to extreme weather or as your skin ages. Rosehip oil rehydrates it with its essential fatty acids, linoleic and linolenic. These acids keep your cell walls strong, so they don’t lose water, resulting in soft and supple skin.

Rosehip oil for the skin also contains high levels of antioxidants, which further the hydration benefit. Your skin will easily absorb the oil and its antioxidants, allowing nutrients into the skin’s deepest layers.

2. Rosehip Oil Moisturizes Your Skin

Since rosehip oil locks moisture in your skin cells, it is a natural moisturizer. The oil isn’t greasy, making rosehip perfect for any skin type. It contains fatty acids and water, which are essential for skin nourishment.

3. Rosehip Oil Exfoliates and Brightens Your Skin

Rosehip oil contains high amounts of vitamins A and C. Vitamin A, also known as retinol, promotes skin cell turnover, while vitamin C helps with cell regeneration. Together, these vitamins eliminate and replace dead skin cells, leaving your skin vibrant and smooth.

Additionally, rosehip oil is high in beta-carotene, an antioxidant that promotes skin cell renewal. As you exfoliate with the oil, your skin becomes brighter, and your skin tone evens out.

4. Rosehip Oil Enhances Collagen Formation

Collagen is essential for skin firmness and elasticity and is known as your skin’s building block. As you get older, your body naturally produces less collagen. The vitamins A and C are essential for collagen production in rosehip oil.

Plus, studies show that rosehip oil stops creating enzymes that break down collagen. Breaking down those enzymes ensures that your collagen levels aren’t compromised. Collagen also helps improve the appearance of wrinkles and keeps the skin moisturized.

5. Rosehip Oil Helps Reduce Skin Inflammation

Rosehip oil contains polyphenols, anthocyanin, and vitamin E, which all have anti-inflammatory properties. This oil also contains the anti-inflammatory fatty acids linoleic acid, alpha-linolenic acid, and oleic acid. These components help control inflammation and redness, bringing relief to your skin.

Because of its anti-inflammatory properties, rosehip oil can help treat:

rosacea
psoriasis
eczema
dermatitis

6. Rosehip Oil Protects Your Skin from UV Rays

Exposure to the sun’s harmful UV rays can lead to premature aging and other skin issues. The UV rays interfere with your body’s ability to make collagen, making it lose elasticity and defining wrinkles. Research shows that vitamins A, C, and E combat visible sun damage and reduce the detrimental effects of UV exposure.

7. Rosehip Oil Helps Reduce Hyperpigmentation

When excess melanin forms dark spots or patches on your skin, it is hyperpigmentation. This condition can occur because of sun exposure, hormonal changes, and certain medications. The retinoids found in rosehip oil can help reduce the appearance of these spots.

Additionally, rosehip oil contains lycopene and beta-carotene. Studies show that these two components can lighten the skin, helping reduce dark patches.

8. Rosehip Oil Helps Reduce Scars, Wrinkles, And Stretch Marks

The fatty acids and antioxidants in rosehip oil promote tissue and skin cell regeneration. This benefit allows the oil to reduce scars, wrinkles, and stretch marks as it heals and revives damaged skin.

In one study, researchers studied two groups of people for twelve weeks after surgery. One group used rosehip oil twice daily on their incision, and the other didn’t use it at all. At the end of the study, the results showed that those who used rosehip experienced significantly more healing.

The beneficial properties of rosehip oil can prevent and undo oxidative damage and promote collagen production. It also promotes healing as it stimulates the healing macrophages.

9. Rosehip Oil Helps Fight Free Radicals

The vitamin C and antioxidants found in rosehip oils help fight free radicals in your skin. By fighting free radicals, this oil helps protect your skin from oxidative stress. This oxidative stress protection prevents skin damage and eliminates the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles while brightening your skin.

10. Rosehip Oil Helps Fight Acne

Since rosehip oil has anti-inflammatory and anti-microbial properties, it helps fight acne. It promotes cell turnover and reduces clogged ducts. Plus, it calms redness while reducing acne cysts.

11. Rosehip Oil Is Known to Have Anti-aging Properties

The vitamin C in rosehip oil gives it a strong anti-aging effect. It protects and repairs your skin from damage and reduces the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles. Plus, rosehip oil contains carotenoids that promote skin cell turnover.

How To Use Rosehip Oil

Here are some ideas of how to use rosehip seed oil to benefit your daily beauty routine.

1. As a Spritzer

Using rosehip oil as a spritzer can help when your skin is dry as it infuses your skin with hydration. Mix filtered water in a small spray bottle with five drops of rosehip oil and two drops of lemon balm oil. Spray it on your face and skin whenever you need some hydration.

2. As an Exfoliating Scrub

To help remove dead skin cells, exfoliate your skin with a rosehip oil mixture. Combine one teaspoon of sugar or baking soda, ten drops of rosehip oil, and three drops of lavender essential oil in a small container. Then, use your fingertips to gently rub it on your face in a circular motion before rinsing it off with cold water.

3. As a Moisturizer

You can make a moisturizer using rosehip oil and a few other ingredients. Fill a glass bottle ¾ of the way with rosehip oil, and then add ten drops of moisturizing essential oil. Add a few drops of lavender or lemon essential oils to give the moisturizer a scent.

4. As a Remedy for Oily Skin

To relieve oily skin, mix one teaspoon of rosehip oil with one tablespoon of sweet almond oil in a glass bottle. Then, add three drops each of lavender, tea tree, and frankincense essential oils. Apply three drops of this mixture to your clean skin, gently massaging it with your fingertips.

5. As a Makeup Remover

You can effectively remove makeup with this rosehip oil and don’t need any other ingredients. Put a few drops onto a cotton ball and use it to wipe away any makeup. You can use rosehip oil on your face daily, making it the perfect addition to your routine.

6. As a Blemish Remover

If you have blemishes, you can use a rosehip mixture to reduce their appearance and heal them quickly. Mix one small bottle of rosehip oil with three drops of vitamin E and tea tree oil. Rub the mixture on your blemishes twice a day for the best results.

Possible Side Effects of Rosehip Oil

Rosehip oil is safe for most people, but there are a few issues you should watch out for. If you experience any side effects, discontinue use right away because it could indicate an allergy. Some of the side effects include:

red, itchy skin
itchy or watery eyes
scratchy throat
nausea or vomiting
difficulty breathing
wheezing
swollen mouth, throat, or face
rapid heartbeat
stomach pain

Final Thoughts on the Benefits of Rosehip Oil for Skin

The benefits of rosehip oil for skin seem never-ending, and they work for any skin type. Rosehip oil can make your skin healthier, radiant, and more refined even as you age.

This all-natural skincare product helps ease inflamed or dry skin and prevents it from recurring. Your skin will feel and look better, and you don’t have to use chemicals to achieve the result.

15 Reasons Why People With Kind Hearts Live Happier Lives

September 17, 2020 by Power of Positivity

People with kind hearts lead happier, more rewarding lives.

Think about it.

Does it seem like people have forgotten the “Golden Rule” these days? Wouldn’t it be nice if one of the soft drink companies could come up with a kindness cocktail or a niceness nectar for people who need a boost of humanity? A Harris Poll found that only one-third of the population considers themselves happy.

The study gave a survey to 2,345 U.S. adults. It was shocking to see that two-thirds of the population isn’t content with their lives, jobs, or overall well-being. These numbers are awful, and something must change. A happy person is usually someone who is kind and looks out for others.

Why Kind Hearts Are Happier?

While the number of joy-filled people may be lacking, those who are kind tend to live longer lives. It’s a novel concept to think that showing kindness to your fellow humans could make you live longer.

Why would being happy affect your longevity on the earth? Here are 15 reasons why kind hearts tend to stick around longer than those who tend to be melancholy.

1. Being Kind Boosts Happiness

When you’re doing something for others, it gives you a sense of accomplishment. Everyone is busy and has a hectic schedule, but when you take a few minutes to be kind even when you don’t have to, it gives you a whole different outlook.

Imagine how different the world would be if people automatically loaded groceries for senior citizens, opened doors for mothers with infants, and just did random acts of kindness for no other reason than the feeling of warmth and happiness it brings. It feels good to help others, and it puts a bounce in your joy-filled bounce in your step.

2. Luckier in Love

Have you ever seen a couple that is so in love that they ooze with mushiness? Then there are those people who tend to be so unlucky that they find every narcissist and toxic person along life’s highway. Why are some people so blessed with good relationships while others struggle?

The key to being lucky in life may be having a kind heart. There are all kinds of people that you date when you’re playing the field. However, the one you choose to marry or commit too is always the one that completes you.

It’s the person that makes you want to do better and work harder. Perhaps, it’s the person who is kind to others, and you see their heart before anything else. Generous people tend to be happier in love because they attract people with like minds.

Being kind and having a big heart are attractive features that everyone wants in a spouse.

3. Engage in Philanthropic Activities

Some many charities and organizations reach out to those in need. Doing philanthropy work tends to get your mind off your troubles and focus on what matters most.

It’s hard to complain about your sore knees when you see someone who lost their legs due to a disease. Benevolence helps you to view the world through a different pair of lenses.

When you have a joyous existence, you count your blessings instead of pinning for your wants.

4. Don’t Suffer from many Health Problems

Harvard Medical School recently did a study regarding the health link to happiness. Happy hearts generally don’t have as many health problems as those who tend to be negative and pessimistic.

True happiness is learning how to free yourself from stress. When you are under constant duress, your cortisol and adrenaline levels are too high. Having these hormone levels at accelerated heights causes your heart to work overtime.

Lowering your stress levels decreases your risk of heart attacks and strokes, not to mention other muscle tension issues. A joy-filled heart is like good medicine to the soul.

5. See the Good in all Around Them

How many times do you look at the good around you? You might look at your home and see a dripping faucet, carpets that are worn, and lights that need to be replaced. However, kind hearts and happy people will be thankful they have a place to lay their heads.

You can extend kindness to others when you see the blessings you have and think of those who are less fortunate.

6. Tend to Have Many Friends

When you’re in the market for a friend, you want the kind, loving, and eager person who is willing to help you. No one wants a needy friend who keeps the relationship one-sided.

Kind hearts attract the masses because everyone wants to be their pal. They’re the ones that you can count on when you need to vent, and they will be there at a moment’s notice when you call anytime day or night.

7. Take Time to Enjoy the Simple Things

Kind hearts love to enjoy the simple things. They find grounding in the beautiful aroma of a rose or the splendor of rainbow after a storm. They have an infectious manner that brings everyone into their simple life.

These people tend to be laid back and don’t allow the simplest of life’s pleasures to pass them by.

8. Never too Busy to Help Someone in Need

Martin Seligman wrote a book about how to have a meaningful life. For this story, he conducted a study. He wanted to see who was happier the people who chased after their pleasures or found pleasure in helping others.

He dubbed the study “Philanthropy versus Fun.” The first group sought happiness by self-pleasure, and the second group found contentment by doing charitable acts. The results were remarkable. The group that helped their fellow man was happier for longer than the group that sought to please themselves.

Happy hearts are never too busy to read to the blind, work in a soup kitchen, or run errands for the elderly.

9. Would Give the Shirt off Their Back to Someone

Happy people would gladly give you the shirt off their back. They are not stingy with their possessions, and they will gladly share. They’re the person that always has a small gift or token to give you whenever they see you.

They may make crafts or baked goods for a new neighbor moving in. Sometimes, they are often a doormat because people take advantage of their generosity, but they don’t let these negative experiences stop them from being kind.

10. Forgiveness Comes Easily

Their forgiving heart is apparent in life’s troubles. These people usually don’t hold grudges or stay mad too long. They are easy to forgive and forget about the past because they don’t want to let it affect their future.

11. Believe Life Comes with Purpose

Someone who has joy chooses to live their life with purpose. They are not content with getting up in the morning, going to work, and returning home. They want to live each day to the fullest. Therefore, they look for opportunities to give back and to make an impact every day.

12. Never Stop Chasing Their Dreams

Just because kind hearts want to help others doesn’t mean that they ever stop chasing their dreams. These people are often goal-driven. They can set goals and make sure they accomplish them. Their tenacity and drive are attractive to others.

13. Always Put Their Family First

Family is an integral part of life. A kind person makes sure to see their mom on Mother’s Day. They send cards to everyone on their birthdays, and they would never miss a family function. They put family first and try to be actively involved with their close and extended relatives.

14. Are Accountable for Words and Actions

Being accountable for your words and actions is a big job. Kind hearts would never want to hurt you for anything. If they feel they have hurt you, then they would be the first to apologize. Though they try to do right, they will admit that they’re not perfect, but their ability to quickly resolve wrongdoings makes them a joy to be around.

15. Prioritize Relationships over Possessions

Worldly possessions don’t mean that much to someone who puts their investments in relationships and experiences. They don’t find joy in new cars or bigger homes. Rather, they make connections and people a priority.

It’s a blessing to be around someone who has their priorities straight and doesn’t spend time trying to keep up with neighbors and family members who seem to have more money. It’s refreshing to find someone that can find contentment in the things they have.

Final Thoughts on How People with Kind Hearts Always Seem to Be Happy

Every day when you get out of bed, you make choices. You select the clothes you will wear, decide what cologne or perfume to put on, and pick out your food for breakfast. Additionally, you choose whether you will be happy or sad.

You decide whether you will help the lady struggling to load her groceries at the supermarket, and you choose whether you will blow up at your spouse for leaving their dirty clothes on the floor. Make a conscious choice to take joy over sadness and happiness over sorrow.

You have the power to change your entire life by simply altering your mindset. Be the person that everyone wants to be around and the one that is considered one of the kind hearts.

15 Natural Insomnia Cures Most People Forget

September 16, 2020 by Power of Positivity

It’s three o’clock in the morning, and The Sandman is nowhere nearby. You’ve tried to count sheep but lose track after 100. It sounds like you could use some of the many natural insomnia cures that have been used successfully for years.

Good sleep hygiene is essential for the quality rest. You need to revitalize your body every night. While you sleep, your brain goes into energy-saving mode. As it stays busy filing information and monitoring vital systems, your body relaxes and produces millions of new cells.

If you don’t get enough sleep, this process is interrupted, and your health will be affected. It’s normal to have occasional bouts of sleeplessness. However, chronic insomnia is a severe condition that needs to be addressed before it causes damage. Those who are struggling with insomnia may consider taking organic supplements from Kratom Earth.

Try These Fifteen Natural Insomnia Cures

Before you risk getting hooked on sleep medication, try some lifestyle changes to promote good sleep hygiene. Then, you can look for ways to get some rest naturally. Here are ten natural insomnia cures for you to consider.

1. Turn Down the Lights

Your brain is hardwired to awaken when stimulated with light. If your room isn’t dark at night, any light can mess with this function, and you will lose sleep. Consider using blackout shades in the windows and turning digital clocks away from your sight.

2. Stay Cool

Set your thermostat to keep your room between 60-67 degrees, which is the temperature that is comfortable for most people for sleeping. Temperatures above or below this point make sleeping difficult. Purchase a mattress that supports your body and use pillows that cradle your head and neck properly.

3. Create a Sacred Space

Your bedroom should be your personal space of refuge and tranquility. Avoid doing paperwork or any other chores in there. Reserve this sacred space for rest, romance, and for sleeping.

4. Try Using White Noise

Does the sound of silence sound like a foghorn in your head? Some people rest better when they sleep with the noise of a fan. If you don’t want the extra breeze, you can also purchase an inexpensive white noise machine to keep at your bedside.

5. Yoga

This ancient practice goes back to the 6th century BCE in India. Ayurveda practitioners developed yoga as a philosophy that benefits the body, mind, and spirit. Modern scientific research suggests that yogic practice can not only strengthen and tone your muscles, but it can also encourage well-being, relaxation, and restful sleep.

Whether you are experienced or a newbie to yoga, it can help you get the sleep you crave. All you need is an inexpensive yoga mat and a comfortable, quiet place to practice. Try simple poses like Wide-Knee Child, Reclining Bound Angle, and Corpse Pose to encourage a good night’s sleep.

6. Meditation

One of the reasons you may be staring at the ceiling all night is the constant chatter in your mind. All night, you replay the events of the day while worrying about things happening tomorrow. Does that sound familiar?

Meditation is an ideal way to reel your thoughts in and allow your mind to rest. While it doesn’t erase your thoughts, it will enable you to acknowledge them and allow them to pass. Before you get to bed each evening, sit in a comfortable place, close your eyes, and be fully aware as your body relaxes.

7. Warm Milk

Some of the old-fashioned natural insomnia cures can be backed by scientific research. Did your mother ever give you a warm glass of milk before bedtime, or if you were having trouble sleeping? Part of why it worked was probably your mother’s nurturing, but the other part was ingredients in the milk.

Tryptophan is a natural chemical in milk that can stimulate the sleep portion of your brain. Did you know that milk also contains melatonin, the brain chemical responsible for your sleep/awake process? As always, your Mom knew what she was doing when she recommended warm milk.

8. Valerian Root

No discussion about natural insomnia cures would be complete without mentioning valerian root. For centuries, the humble valerian plant has been recommended for everything from nausea, to epilepsy, to congestion. It was also valued for inducing restful sleep.

Today, valerian root is a common herbal sleep remedy that is used throughout the world. It comes in different dosages and is available in most pharmacies and health food stores.

9. Remove Electric Devices

Isn’t it ironic that the technology that is supposed to make your life easier can create different problems? For example, go into your bedroom at night, turn out the lights, and look around the room. Do you see total darkness or a multitude of small red and blue eyes blinking at you?

If you spend time watching television, chatting on a cellphone, or scrolling on a mobile device before retiring, they may be sabotaging your sleep. These electronic devices emit low-frequency blue rays that alter your brain’s sleep/wake cycle. Avoid technology at least an hour before bedtime and remove electronic devices from your bedroom.

10. Insist on a Consistent Bedtime

When you are juggling work, caring for your family, and other responsibilities, it’s often difficult to keep a consistent bedtime for yourself. Perhaps you wait until the kids are asleep to catch up on chores or finish a work project. It’s no wonder why so many Americans are sleep deprived these days.

Make a consistent bedtime part of your daily routine. Even when you’d rather sleep in on the weekends, a varied sleep schedule will do more harm than good. Do the math to see when you should go to bed to get 7-8 hours of sleep and make that time a constant.

11. Kick the Caffeine

Are you like many Americans who depend on caffeine to get through the day? Whether you sip a gallon of coffee or tank up on caffeinated sodas, the caffeine overload can keep you counting sheep instead of sleeping.

If you can’t give up caffeine entirely, compromise, and try to drink less. Try decaf coffee, herbal tea, and sodas without caffeine. Avoid drinking anything with caffeine a couple of hours before bedtime.

12. Herbal Tea

Like coffee, tea leaves have caffeine and can cause insomnia. What if you’re used to a hot cup of tea or frosty glasses of iced tea? Instead, why not switch to a delicious herbal tea?

Herbal teas have always been among the plethora of natural insomnia cures, plus they don’t have caffeine. Consider a comforting cup of chamomile, valerian, or passionflower tea to relax your nerves and encourage a good night’s sleep. Herbal teas can be enjoyed hot or iced with the same benefits.

13. Lavender Oil

Among the many essential oils used for natural insomnia cures, lavender remains the Queen of Calm. The lovely purple blossoms native to the Mediterranean region have been prized for food and medicine since recorded history. Great ancient societies such as Babylon, Egypt, Greece, and Rome used lavender oil as a nerve tonic and an essential sleep aid.

Purchase pure essential lavender oil and put a few drops in a diffuser to use at night. You can also spray a bit of diluted oil on your pillows and sheets so the delicate scent can drift you off to dreamland. Lavender promotes a sense of calm and tranquility as well as inducing sleep.

14. Journaling

Do thoughts and ideas race through your mind and keep you up all night? Journaling is a great way to put your thoughts onto paper and leave them for later. Write about the topics that worry you or make a list of things you want to accomplish, so they aren’t cluttering your mind.

You can use a plain notebook or get creative and make a lovely journal that appeals to you. Set aside a time each evening to write in your journal. Write whatever is in your heart and mind, and nobody needs to read it unless you want.

15. Make Your Room Comfortable

Did you know that your bedroom may be the root cause of your sleepless nights? Is your mattress comfortable, or is it too soft or firm?

Do you fight with uncomfortable pillows that go flat and keep your neck in a pinch? Is your room too hot or too cold to sleep comfortably? Make your space a haven that encourages rest.

Final Thoughts About Trying Out These Fifteen Natural Insomnia Cures

Before you take any herbal supplement to promote sleep, tell your primary healthcare provider about your medical history and any medications or supplements you are currently taking. Some herbal supplements are not safe for pregnant or nursing mothers, so get medical advice first.

Without sleep, your body can’t function. If you are tired of tossing and turning in bed every night, there’s hope. With a few adjustments in your lifestyle, like remove electronic devices from your room and practicing natural insomnia cures, you will be sleeping comfortably before you know it.

Eastern Healers Explain 10 Ways Kokum Butter Boosts Skin Anti-Aging

September 16, 2020 by Power of Positivity

The famous singer and actress Cher once wrote a song about turning back the hands of time. Perhaps, if you had the money and access to beauty treatments like this iconic star, you wouldn’t worry about fine lines and wrinkles. Thankfully, you do have products that Eastern healers use like kokum butter.

If you haven’t heard of it, then you’re not alone. It’s been a secret that Indian healers used for centuries, but it’s’s just gaining popularity in the United States. Unlike putting a glossy mask over your hair, trying to improve the look, this butter goes deep to the root to penetrate and heal. Your hair and skin can both benefit from kokum butter.

Do you feel that your hair and skin is looking a bit lackluster these days? Do you see actresses with gorgeous locks and skin, growing old gracefully, and you wonder what their secret is? While you may not have a stylist, who does hair and makeup for you, you can find ways to get the healthy glow you want.

Why Does Aging Affect You So Much?

As you age, you will notice that your skin will become rougher, thinner, have some slack to it, and becomes more fragile. You will bruise more quickly, and you may notice some unsightly dark spots. Part of the problem is that your body produces less collagen than it did in your younger years.

Your genetics and lifestyle both play a factor in the production of these proteins. Due to the lack of this substance, your skin’s surface layer becomes thinner, and you can see blood vessels, which is why you bruise so quickly now. Remember all those times you baked in the sun for hours without sunscreen?

The sun’s rays might not have affected your skin when you were younger, but the damage it caused will undoubtedly find you as you get older. If you want a youthful, lustrous glow, you may try to spend thousands on a facelift or other reconstructive procedures.

However, you’re wasting your time and money because nature has all you need. Eastern healers trust kokum butter to help with anti-aging aspects. The best part about this is that it’s an all-natural cream that doesn’t have any harsh side effects.

As an alternative to invasive procedures, stem cell therapy offers promising avenues for combating the effects of aging. Stem cells possess unique regenerative properties that can aid in tissue repair and rejuvenation, addressing issues such as skin thinning and collagen loss.

This therapy targets age-related diseases by harnessing the body’s natural healing mechanisms, potentially providing a more holistic approach to maintaining youthful skin and overall health.

For those considering non-surgical options, exploring the benefits of stem cell therapy could be worthwhile. To learn more about how stem cell therapy can contribute to anti-aging efforts, visit DVC Stem website for comprehensive information and resources.

Yes, you won’t have redness, dryness, or any other troublesome issues that come with some claimed miracle elixirs. Why is this butter so much better for your skin than what you can buy over the counter at your local drug store?

The Healing Properties of the Kokum Fruit

If you’ve reached for shea or cocoa butter for your skin issues, then you probably didn’t know there was something much better. Kokum butter works like the other varieties in that it helps to restore and protect your hair and skin. Using heating products like a curling iron or straightener causes significant damage to your hair.

Also, the effects of aging on your hair and skin cannot be denied. Do you have any gray hairs on your head? Another problem with aging is that you lose melanin. Melanin is the substance that gives your hair color, as well as the iris of your eyes.

As you age, your body doesn’t produce this pigment, and your hair loses its hue. Your once chestnut or golden locks become white or silver. Not only does the color fade, but you will notice that your gray hairs are wiry and unmanageable.

They seem to be dry and brittle and have a mind of their own. While Kokum won’t restore your tresses’ color, it can rehydrate and make your hair manageable again. All the damage from heat, aging, and chemicals that are put into your hair can be erased using this healing butter.

The 411 on Kokum Butter

The butter of the kokum trees is made from the fruits of this plant. You will find them growing tropically in India. When harvested, the insides of the fruit, or the yellow butter, are gathered. Since it has stearic acid in it, the fat must be stored at room temperature.

It has a consistency that is very much like shea butter, and it will melt once from the gentle warmth of your hands. The fruit is also edible, and the people of India also enjoy mixing delicious chocolates and nuts with this sweet treat. However, most commonly, it’s’s used to make cosmetics, shampoos, soaps, lotions, and other skincare products.

Alone, kokum butter is exceedingly challenging to spread because it has such a stiff consistency. Remember, it needs heat to make it pliable. Thankfully, when mixed with other plant-based butter, it can make it easier to spread.

In terms of weight, kokum butter is not nearly as heavy or greasy as shea or cocoa varieties. So that means you can use it on your face or any other part of your body without having an oil glow.

To test the healing properties of this butter, a university in India conducted a study on 23 patients. They applied Kokum to their cracked heels for 15 days straight, both in the morning and again in the evening. At the end of the study, the results were uncanny.

The heels of all 23 patients were smooth and healthy. It was as if they had grown new skin. Not only did this butter smooth the cracks, but it seemed to restore and rejuvenate the skin, too.

Since kokum butter has no smell and is not greasy, it was easy enough to apply and not worry about it offending someone’s nose or getting oily residue on beds and socks. If they had used shea or cocoa butter in this trial, it might have the same outcome, but the smell and oil factors would have been challenging to handle.

10 Ways to Boost Healing with Nature’s Butters

By now, you’re probably sold on the healing properties of Kokum, but before you commit to buy this butter, you want to know all the things it can do. Well, here are the anti-aging and other benefits of the kokum plant.

1. Softens Heals and Rough Feet

The study mentioned earlier proves that cracking heels and rough feet can be soft as a baby’s skin in a matter of days. It’s easy to see why so many people love this butter during sandal season.

2. Works Great on Acne

One of the problems with aging, especially women during menopause, is the presence of acne. If you thought you were done with pimples, then guess again. Since Kokum has antibacterial and antifungal properties, it works great to heal your embarrassing blemishes.

3. Rejuvenates Thin Skin

Kokum provides oxygenation of the cells, which means that the necessary nutrients get to your skin. You will be amazed at how much better your skin looks with regular use.

4. Adds Shine and Luster to Your Hair

The same oxygenation that Kokum provides to the skin it also does to the hair. While it’s not greasy, it gives strength and viability to the hair shaft.

5. Can Restore Moisture to Your Scalp

Stop reaching for a dandruff shampoo or a conditioner that only leaves an oily buildup on your locks. Use the power of nature and this butter to ensure you repair and seal moisture to your dry scalp.

6. Soothes Dry, Itchy Skin

Nothing is worse than dry or itchy skin. Thankfully, you will see a difference after one use of Kokum.

7. Can Help Treat Rashes

Do you get rashes from rosacea or rash from lupus on your face or other parts of your body? The dry and itchy sensation, as well as unsightly redness, can be gone with Kokum.

8. Prevents Wrinkles

The cells’ oxygenation can help with fine lines and wrinkles you already have, and it can prevent new ones from forming.

9. Works as Medicine to Cuts and Wounds

While you may reach for antibiotic ointment when you get a cut or scrape, you should reach for nature’s butter instead. With its healing properties, it can get deep into the wound’s surface to heal and restore health to the area.

10. Makes a Great Lip Balm

Nothing makes your face look and feel worse than dry, chapped lips. Thankfully, Kokum makes an excellent lip balm when used with another carrier oil to soften it. Soon you won’t dread the effect of the winter season and the way it dries out your skin.

Final Thoughts on Trusting Kokum Butter to Provide Skin Anig-aging Benefits

There are so many beauty products out there that are made with the thoughts of turning back the clock on your skin. While some of them work, others fall short. You can spend a fortune on creams and surgical procedures to make your hair and skin look better or look to nature for help.

Kokum is a plant that makes an incredible butter for your skin, hair, and body. Stop trusting chemicals and human-made products that can irritate or even burn the skin. Mother Nature provides everything you need in the Garcinia indicia tree from India.

Psychology Explains 10 Ways to Be Empathetic, Even When It’s Hard

September 16, 2020 by Power of Positivity

Do you know how to be empathetic? Have you ever talked to a friend when the conversation suddenly takes a downward turn and becomes a challenge? Perhaps, your friend has lost their job, had a relative diagnosed with cancer, or their significant other broke up with them.

To make matters worse, they’re a single parent trying to raise a toddler. It’s hard to find the right words to say when it seems like chaos is erupting on the other end of the line. You’re sorry that your friend is going through so much, but you don’t know what you could say to make things better for them.

Trying to be a good human being, you might offer a thoughtful, “I’m here for you, and things will get better.” While you may sympathize with your friend because you do feel sorry for him or her, sometimes people use vain words just to fill the silence.

However, empathizing with them means that you understand what they’re going through and can relate to them. How do you learn to get beyond sympathy and move into an empathetic realm? If you’re struggling with mastering the concept, then here are ten ways to be empathetic.

1. Listen More Than You Talk

When your friend is going through a difficult time, they want you to listen to them. Let them say what’s on their mind and troubling them at that moment. Please give them the platform to speak and show your support by listening and giving them your undivided attention.

In most cases, the best way you can be empathetic is by just giving someone your ear and pouring their heart out to you. At times, it’s difficult to hear all your friend’s troubles, especially when you have your own issues. However, it’s what a good friend does for another.

2. Don’t Try to Fix the Problem

Unless you’re a licensed counselor or psychologist, let them tell you what’s wrong in their life without trying to diagnose or psychoanalyze them. You can show your support by listening.

The chances are that you don’t have the answers to their dilemma either, but you can be empathetic and build trust with them by not trying to play the person who can fix everything.

Your friend doesn’t need you to fix his other life as she will figure things out. She just wants you to take time out of your busy schedule and listen to their hurts.

3. Never Compare Your Story to Theirs

Why is it when someone goes through a rough part in life that the human in you tries to compare it with things you’ve been through? While an empathetic person will try to see things from their perspective, you should avoid using sentences that start with something like:

I know just how you feel
I’ve been through something similar
I felt the same way when

All these introductions start with the word “I.” The problem is that this situation with your friend isn’t about you; it’s about them. You might have lost a job previously and know the pain that it causes, but you don’t know their specific feelings.

Every person handles things differently and has a varied circumstance, so it’s impossible that you know exactly how they feel. Situations may be similar, but there is no way that they are the same. If you compare your situation with theirs, it negates their unique feelings and experience, which is not empathetic.

4. Validate Their Feelings

Validation is an essential part of being empathetic. The first thing you should do is to be active in listening, and the second thing is to validate how they feel. Don’t try to correct their thoughts or feelings.

Instead, it would help if you listened to how they feel and register that as a matter of importance. If they tell you that they don’t want to live anymore, be sympathetic to those emotions. Don’t patronize them and say things like, “No, there’s no way you want to give up on life.”

Additionally, since suicidal thoughts are commonplace when someone has a rush of bad luck, then you need to be friendly enough to ask them if they need help and then follow through.

5. Be Vulnerable

To build trust with your friend, you need to show your vulnerability. It would help if you were open and honest with them above all else. If the situation looks bleak, don’t paint the picture as something that’s an insignificant bump in the road.

The real art of being vulnerable means that you share a bit of yourself with your friend. It can be something that is very private, and it’s a thing that you don’t tell many people. While you shouldn’t compare the situations, you can talk about your insecurities and worries.

Nobody wants a friend who acts like their world is all sunshine and roses when facing some of the biggest challenges of their life. They want to see and hear your worries and insecurities too.

Only share something about your life if it can help the current situation. Remember, this isn’t about you right now. It’s about your friend.

Learn how schools in Denmark now include empathy training in the classroom.

6. Put Yourself in Their Shoes

While you must be careful and don’t deflect from the focus on your friend, you need to learn to put yourself in their shoes. How would you feel at this moment? What would you do to resolve the matter?

This tip is not something you vocalize but rather something you internalize. Before you answer any questions or give advice, put yourself in their shoes for a minute. It’s easy to tell someone else what to do when you sit there with a job, spouse, and no relatives in medical distress.

Now, when you put yourself in their shoes for a minute and consider their thoughts, it will change your whole perspective. Being empathetic allows you to feel their fears and anxieties for a moment.

7. Be Present

How many times have you tried to have a conversation with someone, and they can’t put their phone down for five minutes to talk to you? Don’t deflect from the conversation, and make sure that you give your friend your undivided attention.

There’s nothing worse than trying to talk to someone, and they are answering their kids, have a bunch of noise going on in the background, or are a million miles away. An in-person conversation can be just as frustrating when you don’t make eye contact and are too busy texting or answering phone calls to digest how your friend truly feels.

8. Strive for Compassion

Compassion helps you to put things into perspective and take things on as a team. When you’re compassionate about others, you are suffering together. Understanding is what allows you to hug them and tell them that you will be there for them during these difficult times.

To be empathetic, you must learn how to channel your compassionate side so that your friend doesn’t feel all alone in the battle.

9. Don’t Make Assumptions.

It would help if you never made assumptions. Instead, you should focus your mind on the truth of the matter, not on what you believe to be the truth. It’s essential that you see your friend’s situation for the way it is, and make sure that you don’t read things into it and see it the way you want to see it.

You may not believe the assumptions your mind creates, but the energy of your thoughts that you invested in your friend will return to you. Be active in listening and not jumping to conclusions.

10. Learn to Withhold Judgement

Why are human beings so judgmental? You should show your support to your friend and be empathetic and not be critical. No one on this planet is perfect, including you. Everyone makes mistakes and has deficiencies in life.

Always be willing to give people the benefit of the doubt, even when you have every right not to. Remember, karma will come back on you someday, and if you have lived your life in the judgment of others, then it will come back to bite you.

Remember when you’re pointing your finger at your friend and telling her all the things your friend needs to do; you have more fingers pointing back at yourself.

Final Thoughts on Learning to Be Empathetic

Mastering empathetic listening is not an easy skill to conquer, particularly today, when many things are competing for your attention. What your friend needs now more than anything is for you to be there and listen to her.

Your friend doesn’t want your judgment. And they don’t want you to tell them all the things they could and should be doing. Be a sounding board and compassionate listener. Part of empathy means that you are quiet and allow the other person to speak. Give him or her your undivided attention, and don’t compare your journey with thiers.

Though it seems like a lot for you to do during a conversation, you can master empathy with some work. Someone who can show sympathy and empathy has good character and will be a person that everyone will want as their friend.

10 Tips for Helping Family Caregivers to Avoid Burnout

September 16, 2020 by Power of Positivity

If you know a family caregiver, you know how exhausted and overwhelmed they usually are. They often feel like they lack control over what is happening and that they have too much to do. Taking care of others full time can take a severe toll on their mental health if they don’t have help.

With help, they will be able to find a balance in their hectic schedule. The caregiver will have a chance to experience joy and hope again. Without help, those who give so much to others won’t have time to do everything. Indeed, they often have many things on their plate, including the following:

work
kids
spouses
hobbies
errands
giving care to others
self-care

Unfortunately, many family caregivers find that their old friends seem to disappear. They don’t want to stick around when their friend is too busy to do the things they used to do. It is important to remember that this does not mean they don’t care; they don’t know how to offer support.

They need friends and loved ones, though, and people to support them and be there for them. Even if you have been an absent friend since they became a caregiver, it isn’t too late to change. They’ll enjoy the company and support even if they haven’t seen you in a long time.

What is Caregiver Burnout?

Most caregivers find caring for their loved one rewarding, but it is also stressful. When they don’t get a break, it impacts their mental health and only gets worse as time goes on. It affects their health, relationships, and emotional well-being.

After some time of experiencing burn out, it can affect the person being cared for, as well. It isn’t just for the person giving the care you are offering help, it’s for the person receiving care, too. The caregiver’s health and well-being are just as important as the other persons, and they often go hand-in-hand.

Signs and Symptoms of Caregiver Burnout

They don’t normally tell anyone when they are experiencing burnout. They suffer in silence because they don’t want to put a burden on anyone else. There are some burnout signs and symptoms you can watch for, though.

anxiety
depression
irritability
feeling run-down or exhausted
difficulty sleeping
overreacting
health problems
difficulty focusing
feeling resentful
increase in the consumption of alcohol
smoking when they didn’t before
overeating
neglecting themselves or their responsibilities
cutting back or quitting leisurely activities
lack of life satisfaction
inability to relax
impatient
feeling hopeless or helpless

As you can see, the symptoms of burnout are intense. If you can get ahead of them, you can help prevent burnout. You should step in immediately, especially if you already recognize many of the symptoms on this list.

Tips for Helping Family Caregivers

1. Listen to The Person’s Needs

Sometimes, they need someone they can vent to and express their feelings. They don’t need you to solve their problems for them. They need someone to listen to them.

Do not offer advice unless they solicit it, because that can be frustrating to them. Instead, spend the time listening and only chime in with sounds or comments to let them know you’re still listening.

By being fully engaged in this way, they’ll know that you truly care. Keep in mind that people tend to know when you aren’t fully listening. So, don’t tell them they can count on you if you aren’t fully engaged.

2. Avoid Being Negative or Telling Agonizing Tales

Someone who is going through this situation doesn’t want or need to hear about other instances. Although you may believe you are simply making conversation, it could cause worry and stress for them. Unless you have something positive or comforting to say, please keep it to yourself.

3. Ask What You Can Do to Help

If they deny your help at first, tell them you are helping anyway. This person will struggle with asking for and accepting help, even when they truly need it. Offer to do whatever they need because there is quite a bit on their plate.

Avoid saying things like, “let me know if you need some help”, because they may never tell you anything. Instead, ask them specifically what they need.

They often have many errands you can run for them, including a trip to the library or post office. They might also need to get the car washed or perform an oil change. Other errands you could run for them, including going grocery shopping or picking up prescriptions.

Household chores are another task that they may need help with. From raking leaves to shoveling snow, there is always yard work to do. Otherwise, you could help with cleaning or dusting things around the house or take care of computer problems.

You could help them with regular maintenance on their HVAC appliances or changing the batteries in smoke and carbon monoxide detectors. Another option for helping them is updating or fixing the décor in their home to help them enjoy it more.

A few other options include walking their dog or taking their pets to the vet. You can help plan their meals or take their kids to do fun activities for a while.

Additionally, you can help them with carpooling or taking over when they have events they want to attend. Whatever help you are ready and willing and able to offer, they will be appreciative. Plus, it will help them avoid burnout.

4. Don’t Second Guess the Tough Decisions

If you second guess their decisions, they will feel judged, which will only stress them out more. This means keeping negative stories or thoughts to yourself. You don’t know the reason they have made the decisions, so support them through all of it.

5. Give The Person Space Whenever They Need It

Don’t continually nag them to go out, and don’t push to spend time together if they’d rather be alone. Sometimes a caregiver needs alone time so that they can regroup and de-stress. Watch out for uncharacteristic isolation, however, because they can be harmful and have severe consequences.

Research shows that grandparents who babysit could live longer.

6. Bring Food to the Household

Whether you bring a full meal, a dessert, or just finger foods, they will be undeniably grateful. If the food can be frozen, that is even better because they can use it whenever they need it. Even a fresh dish to eat right away is great, however, because they often neglect themselves.

7. Take The Caregiver Out for a Break

Help them find someone to take over their duties for a little bit, and then take them out. Please make sure the person you help them choose is trustworthy, of course. If they are worried the entire time, they won’t enjoy their experience of being out.

You can take them shopping or out for a meal. Another option is to take the caregiving person to get their hair or nails done. You could also take them to a fun event or anything else you think they might enjoy.

8. Don’t Cause More Work for Those Who Work So Hard

Causing more work for them will only cause more stress and overwhelmed feeling. One instance of creating more work for them would be telling them you’re bringing people over to their home. Additionally, don’t have them cook for you or clean up after you.

Even when you continually tell them not to go through any trouble, they will anyway. Instead, ask your friend when a good time would be before simply dropping in or springing visitors on them. When you visit them, especially if you are bringing others with you, be sure to take care of all preparations.

9. Don’t Exclude The Caregiver from Your Life

They will frequently decline invitations, but you should invite them anyway. It will make them feel uplifted if they know you thought of them. Plus, when things are happening in your life, be sure to tell them, so they don’t find out from another source.

When you do, invite them somewhere, help them find help if they need it. Finding someone to help with the care is sometimes the reason the person might turn down invitations in the first place.

If they can’t come when you have invited them, don’t give them a guilt trip. Sometimes they are too exhausted to come, and other times they don’t have the help. Making them feel bad will only make their situation worse.

10. Take Over Caregiving Duties for Just a Few Hours

Often, the best thing for them is to get away for a while. A caregiving provider does not normally have others that they can trust to take on the responsibilities. So, when you offer, they will feel completely comfortable leaving for a while to take care of themselves.

Final Thoughts on Tips for Helping Family Caregivers to Avoid Burnout

Family caregivers need help sometimes, even when they don’t ask for it. If you notice they are beginning to become burnt out, step in and help them out before it becomes severe. With so much workload on their plate, it is only natural that they become overwhelmed, and their mental health will suffer.

Even if you don’t know how to help, offer to pitch in somehow. They will appreciate the kind thought, and the help you give them will ease some of their stress. Remember to be patient with caregivers and give them space when that is what they need.

OB/GYNs Reveal 8 Signs of Prenatal Depression (and how to help it)

September 15, 2020 by Power of Positivity

There’s a reason that we call babies a bundle of joy so often. What could bring a couple to feel more blessed and excited than to know that they are expecting a child? If you have children, you can relate to these feelings.

As a mother-to-be, do you remember how friends and family would flock around you to share your nine-month-journey? People probably complimented you on the radiant glow as you carried a gift of life inside. Of course, you felt elated. But you also likely felt stressed and apprehensive at the same time.

Your Internal Nursery

Without the innate ability to procreate, humanity wouldn’t exist. The female body is uniquely structured to conceive and nourish a child from a fertilized egg to a newborn. As the zygote attaches to the velvety walls of your womb, a protective amniotic fluid surrounds it and later forms into a baby.

While your little one is snuggled in your abdomen, its belly is attached to your placenta by an umbilical cord. This vital lifeline has connective blood vessels which provide fresh blood and filtration through your body. The umbilical cord also functions as a port that carries nourishment from the mother’s body to the baby.

Throughout the usual nine-month gestation period, your body is in full nursery mode. It takes orders from your brain, endocrine structure, and the powerful pregnancy hormones coursing through your system. Your baby’s well-being depends on how healthy your body is and the delicate balance of nutrition and hormones.

These hormones will stimulate milk ducts in your breasts to prepare milk for the soon-coming infant. Humans, like all other mammals, produce breast milk to feed their young. It’s loaded with vitamins, minerals, and essential antibodies tailored especially for your newborn’s needs.

Although your body is genetically programmed to produce hormones in specific ratios, the balance can sometimes be skewed, and your body responds accordingly. New mothers usually feel these frequent hormonal fluctuations and experience what’s called “The baby blues.”

What is Prenatal Depression

While birthing a child can be one of the most excruciating and exhausting experiences you’ll ever have as a woman, it’s also the most joyful and exciting one. It’s no wonder that your mind is a flutter of emotions and hormones during expectancy.

Amid your overwhelming excitement are feelings of exhaustion, uncertainty, and depression. Thankfully, after a couple of weeks, most expectant mothers go through more changes, and their perceptions of depression diminish or disappear. However, you may be among the many moms-to-be who has depression that lingers, and they don’t know what to do about.

Prenatal depression, also called perinatal depression, affects approximately one in eight pregnant women in America each year. Although medical experts believed that pregnancy hormones play a role, additional evidence suggests that an imbalance of these hormones is a primary culprit. The signs and symptoms of prenatal depression correspond to those of clinical depression.

Signs and Symptoms of Prenatal Depression

If you are carrying a baby, your body and mind will experience a plethora of changes. It’s normal to become overwhelmed and have feelings of depression. However, if you notice these signs and symptoms for more than two weeks, you may have prenatal depression, and you should consult your healthcare provider:

No longer are interested in hobbies and activities you’ve always enjoyed
Extreme anxiety about the baby
Self-doubt and low self-esteem issues concerning your ability to be a good mother
Change in eating habits that result in malnutrition and inadequate prenatal weight gain
Substance abuse such as alcohol, tobacco, or illegal drugs
Lack of proper prenatal care and indifference to medical advice
Inability to be reassured
Contemplating suicide

A few symptoms of clinical depression are also common in pregnancy, such as lack of interest, poor sleeping habits, and feelings of hopelessness. Maybe you ignore these because you think it’s just your hormones. Even then, you and your healthcare provider must talk about these symptoms to see if they are linked to prenatal depression.

Perhaps, you are hesitant to seek medical advice because the thoughts of a mental illness diagnosis would embarrass you. Unfortunately, many expecting mothers avoid treatment because of how society continues to stigmatize depression and other psychological issues. Such avoidance can only make the situation worse.

When you’ve experienced these symptoms over a couple of weeks or more, they may increase your anxiety and cause unnecessary feelings of guilt. The emotional storm can intensify and create a health crisis for you and your unborn child.

Risks and Potential Causes of Prenatal Depression

Are you at risk for prenatal depression? Just as with other mental disorders, certain risk factors may make you more prone to experience it. If you fall into one or more of these categories, you should be especially mindful of any signs or symptoms. Along with hormone imbalances, here are seven possible causes for this depression:

History of perinatal depression with your previous pregnancies
History of mental illnesses, especially depression and anxiety
Undue stress in the home/financial difficulties
Family history of perinatal depression or other psychiatric disorders
Lack of a support system
A toxic or abusive relationship with your partner
Unintentional or unwanted pregnancy

How is Perinatal Depression Diagnosed?

When you find out that you are pregnant, your OB/GYN will accompany you on your nine-month journey. At some point in your first trimester, your healthcare team will ask you a standard set of questions related to signs and symptoms of perinatal depression. It would help if you answered these questions thoroughly and honestly for early detection and diagnosis.

They will probe into your medical history and current condition to rule out any other health issue. Some of the next questions will pinpoint any signs and symptoms of perinatal depression, and if you have any risk factors. Thankfully, if you’re suffering from depression, your healthcare team can discuss viable treatment options for you.

How is Prenatal Depression Treated?

Just like the treatment for other mental health issues, treatment for perinatal depression is not a one size fits all. Every mother diagnosed is different, so your treatment plan will be tailored to your needs. Your prenatal healthcare team may discuss a blend of therapy, medication, and things you can do at home.

Build Your Support System

Mental health treatment is more successful when patients have a proper support system. Do you feel like you have adequate support from family and friends? Does your support network reach out to your local community, and you feel like you have a voice?

Even if you aren’t diagnosed with perinatal depression, you need a healthy support system throughout your pregnancy and after you deliver your baby. When you feel overwhelmed and inadequate, having someone on your side is a great benefit.

If possible, you need your mate’s support more than anyone. Your person can be there to listen, encourage, and help you every step of your journey. If you don’t have a partner, maybe your go-to can be a beloved family member or trusted friend.

Research links taking acetaminophen during pregnancy to ADHD in children.

Give Therapy a Try

There is no shame in admitting that you have a problem and that you need help. Therapy is an excellent tool for treating mental health conditions like prenatal depression. Again, don’t allow false conceptions of the past to stand between you and having the treatment you need for you and your unborn child.

If you are diagnosed with perinatal depression, ask your prenatal healthcare team for a referral to a therapist who has experience in this area. It should be a specialist whom you trust, and you feel comfortable in the communication.

You and your therapist can explore the type of therapy that would be best for you, be it Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), psychotherapy, or another mode. You don’t always need to turn to medications for help.

Get Some Exercise

When you carry a baby inside and have the added pounds of expectancy, the last thing you may think about is exercise. However, prenatal experts recommend that expectant mothers stay reasonably active during and after their expectancy. Not only does it benefit your body, but it can boost the chemicals in your brain that control your moods.

Talk to your healthcare provider before you attempt any exercise regimen while pregnant or afterward. Many traditional exercises can be modified so you can safely do them without hurting yourself or your unborn child. Even a short walk outside can brighten your spirits.

Antidepressants (the last resort for treating prenatal depression)

If natural remedies fail you, antidepressants are a final option a doctor might try.

Many of the same medications used to treat other depression disorders can also be used to treat perinatal depression. Your prenatal healthcare team can discuss options with you that are considered safe for expectant or nursing mothers. Talk to them about any other medications or supplements you currently take.

During your pregnancy, be compliant with your medication and talk to your provider before changing or discontinuing any antidepressant. If you are feeling better, it means that the drug is working, it doesn’t mean you no longer need it. Sometimes, new mothers may need medication after the baby is born and beyond.

Final Thoughts on Beating Prenatal Depression and a More Enjoyable Pregnancy

Having a baby may be one of the hallmarks of your life, but you don’t have to allow perinatal depression to rob you of your joy. With the right diagnosis and treatment, you can welcome your precious baby into the world in good health and vitality.

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