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Transformation Might Be Hard, But It Doesn’t Need to Be Complicated

June 7, 2021 by Laura Araujo

If you’re anything like me, you’ve spent the last year donning your finest pajamas, scarfing snacks long after dinner, and spending maybe a little more time in a chair and at your computer. And, with the end of the pandemic in sight, you are probably feeling a powerful desire to reset. So take advantage of this moment of rebirth and transformation after a year that invited you to really question everything.

Or is all that just me?

Well, you’re still here reading, so I’m going with “I’m not alone” and that you share my desire to shake things up and take the best of what we’ve learned in this last year and use it to create something new — an existence more rooted in what is truly important to you.

BUT — there’s always a but, isn’t there? — there’s only one problem: Change. Is. Hard.

I’ll explain why it’s so hard in just a moment. But let me say up-front that while change is hard, it’s not impossible. But if you want to change, you’ll need to, well, change the way you approach it.

And there’s also some good news in there: while truly affecting lasting transformation is an investment, it doesn’t have to be complex. In fact, there’s a super simple way to do it. But it’s probably going to sound counterintuitive to you.

But before we go there, let’s get into why changing is so very hard.

Why Transformation Is So Hard

You’ve heard it. I’ve heard it. EVERYONE’S heard it. Your thinking can re-wire your brain. Neurons that fire together wire together. Your thoughts alone will allow you to change anything you want in your life. If only it were truly that simple.

While there is verifiable power in positive thinking and affirmation, on their own, they run smack into a problem with how we think our brain works. We tend to think of it sort of like a sponge, always ready to take on something new. However, the harsher reality is that as adults, our brains are not very malleable at all.

So, if we want to transform ourselves, we’re going to have make our brains a bit more open to change by doing some work to nurture our brain’s soil and facilitate what is called neuroplasticity, or the malleability of our brain.

Despite what popular magazines may tell you unless you’re under twenty, it’s actually quite hard to make changes to the stuff between your ears.

We are born with thousands of neurotransmitters (wires, if you will) loosely floating around in our heads. That’s exciting because it gives us so many possibilities, but as we age, those neurons form neuropathways and, eventually, form into even more solid neurohighways.

Moreover, the space between those neuropathways reduces as well, filled in with glial cells. These special cells function like packing peanuts and make it harder for our brain to make new connections.

In short, as time goes by, we get more customized to meet our particular needs. But all that customization makes it harder for us to change.

This process is why cultivating and sustaining malleability in the form of brain plasticity is so critical! But malleability alone doesn’t enact transformation. That’s why we need to leverage a somewhat counterintuitive tool to create it: routine.

Leveraging a Routine to Drive Change

While you may think of a routine as something that you do when you’re trying not to change. In fact, it’s actually one of the most powerful tools you have to enact change.

In fact, it’s by cultivating a healthy routine that you can take that malleability and turn it into actionable transformation.

With a malleable brain, you can not only adopt new habituations, ideas, and concepts.. But you can also build a routine that serves your objectives. Just like our brains get customized over time, our routines can be deliberately customized to serve our purpose.

You get to decide what works and what doesn’t, and, in turn, you can cull away anything that doesn’t resonate with you and your intended purpose.

But beware. The problem with both routine and this neural culling are that you can fall into habits that don’t fulfill your purpose or lead you to the life you desire to live if you aren’t intentional.

However, the exciting news is that you can use this customization process to your advantage by making deliberate shifts to your routine to realize the change you seek.

Preparing for Transformation

Are you starting to feel excited? You know the players, you know what’s going on inside your brain, and you now understand why all those past efforts to make a significant change in your life hit some speed bumps.

Most importantly, you now know what it’s going to take to make your hope for transformation into a reality. It’s exciting stuff! And, if you’re anything like me when I first discovered all this gooey goodness, you’re probably chomping at the bit to get started.

Woah, there, boys and girls!!

It’s not that simple. Well, actually, it is, but you need to know a few things first. To create a new routine that will lead you to all this amazing transformation, you’re going to need to do something first: create healthy, fertile soil. You need to create a wee bit of that brain plasticity.

Uh oh. Does that sound complicated?

The good news is that it’s not. In fact, there’s a simple, 5-step protocol that will help you create higher levels of brain plasticity. These five practices will allow you to improve and maintain malleability in your brain — precisely what you need to do if you want to build a new transformation-powering routine. Here are the five steps:

Step 1: Decide

The first step to kick-starting your transformation is building elementary wiring that corresponds with your desire for change. This step is foundational because making that decision essentially programs a part of your brain called the prefrontal cortex (or the PFC). It is the executive decision-maker of your brain (the boss, if you will) and determines how you react and engage with emotions. It is the driver of self-control and the engager of new habits. Therefore, the first step in establishing fresh wiring is to establish that you would like that new wiring to exist and make sure your PFC is on the job!

Step 2: Fertilize

The second pivotal factor for increasing plasticity is what I fondly refer to as brain fertilizer. You can dream about making changes all you want, but if your “soil” is unfit for nurturing new neuropathways, you will be disappointed. Brain-derived neurotrophic factor (commonly referred to as BDNF) is the ultimate brain fertilizer because it helps neurons grow — and that helps make new neuron-to-neuron connections possible. Although you can’t go to a garden center for this particular fertilizer, you can upregulate BDNF production through aerobic exercise, whole foods, and a healthy fasting practice.

Step 3: Be Alert

The third ingredient in this plasticity recipe is to be alert and aware of what’s happening. Contrary to what you may think, you can’t just be alert whenever you want. We think of it as alertness when our body releases epinephrine (more commonly known as adrenaline). Epinephrine, when released from the locus coeruleus at the top of our brain stem, wakes up your brain, showering it in adrenaline. This primes your brain and puts it into action mode, making it ready to receive new information — which is critical if you’re going to introduce a new change-inducing routine.

To increase your alertness and, therefore, openness to new information, you need to up your epinephrine levels. Some ways to do that is ideally through a good night of sleep, but also through a protocol that may not be for everyone, including things like fasting, taking coffee, or using stimulants like nicotine, Adderall, and nutraceuticals.

Step 4: Fuel Your Focus

As you’ve probably experienced, however, simply being alert doesn’t automatically lead to better focus. Likewise, alertness, in and of itself, does not result in plasticity.

In addition to the alertness from the epinephrine release, you also need to focus on that alertness — something that is handled by acetylcholine, another neurochemical released from both the nucleus basalis and the brain stem. You can think of it as the fuel to your alertness engine. When it’s released, it kick-starts your nervous system and opens your brain to change. The best way to help this process is to ensure you’re getting enough of a nutrient called choline in your diet (or via a supplement if you must). The best way to do that is to focus (pun intended!) on eating a diet rich in whole foods.

Step 5: Rest

Kick-starting is great and important, but for transformation to really bake in and be long-lasting, you’re going to need to rest. I’ve written about the importance of sleep — and this is part of the reason why.

But if you are not a huge fan of sleep or can’t make time for it in your busy schedule (eye roll), you can also explore what is called non-sleep deep rest (NSDR, for short). In this practice, you’re basically putting yourself into a state of sensory deprivation (no music or sound, eyes closed, supine).

Yes, I am saying that naps are good! In fact, research has found that practicing NSDR for less than 90 minutes directly after learning was actually more effective for learning retention than even a solid night of sleep! Take that anti-nappers!

That said, not only does getting adequate shut-eye to protect and preserve your nervous system and brain function, but it’s during that 8 hours of rest that any neural circuitry that activates during the day gets strengthened. In other words, sleep is what really seals the deal when it comes to neuroplasticity and adaptability.

Reset Your Routine

Now that you’ve prepared your brain for a change, you’re ready to get things moving by instituting a new routine that will rewire things to create the change you want in your life.

But before you either dive in (or maybe dismiss this as too simplistic), you need to understand what a routine actually is and how it works inside your brain — because there’s a good chance you have an incomplete picture of what’s going on.

A routine is an intentional series of micro-choices (or what we call activations), from brushing your teeth to meditating, to spending an hour learning a new language, that you repeat regularly.

Unlike habits, however, routines are NOT automatic. They require you to be intentional, deliberate, and disciplined. They take a consistent daily effort — and that’s the key to their power.

Routines are the key ingredients and building blocks that lead to sustainable and life-changing habits if you do them intentionally.

This is because a habit can take anywhere from 66 to around 300 days to form. This process means that you need a whole lot more than willpower to push through to make that habit stick. That’s where the routine kicks in. It provides a resource and roadmap for your prefrontal cortex. It takes out all the extra guesswork and prevents the emotional part of your brain (your limbic system) from taking over and engaging reactively.

So by making the intentional choice up-front and building it into a routine, you are essentially programming your brain with the change you want to see in your life.

However, as you probably know from experience, establishing a new routine is not as simple as it sounds. In fact, because using a routine to reset and power change is both so critical — and so challenging — we’ve actually created a free mini-program to walk you through the process step-by-step and help you accomplish it.

While profound and critical, the steps towards transformation are actually pretty straightforward:

Recognize your purpose and what matters most to you. To adopt a routine that is truly transformative, you need to start with your why. How do you want to be remembered in your last days? What drives you to wake up each morning? These are challenging questions, so we created an exercise that we call The Obituary Test to help.
Take Inventory. With your purpose and the change you want to make clear in your mind, the next step is to inventory what you’re presently doing on a day-to-day basis. Now, I know that this is not a fun thing to do. But it’s important to be honest with yourself and note what you are actually doing on a day-to-day, hour-to-hour basis in your life. Doing an honest assessment and writing out how you fill your hours is the first essential step.
Make Room. After you’ve noted those three hours of Netflix you’ve been binging each night, you MAY decide that your steady diet of Schitt’s Creek is not exactly driving transformative shifts in your life. If so, it’s time to make some room by going through and cutting out any activities that are not aligned with the change you want to make.
Reset Your Routine. This is the most pivotal moment. Now that you’ve made some room, this is when you choose which activities you will adopt to shape and mold your new existence. This is the map to your new transformation! Be choosey here. This is not a place for comfort zones.
Chunk & Cue. There’s one last step — and it may be the most important. Part of why it’s hard to get new routines to stick and why, as a result, they don’t often lead to the change you seek is that things get in the way and knock you off-track. To prevent that, you should take the important parts of your new routine and group them in a series of “chunks.” Then, create a “cue” for each chunk that triggers you to perform it.

Take Action

Last but not least, your job is to put this new routine into action. Slap it on your refrigerator, plaster sticky notes all over your house. Do whatever you need to do to follow this new protocol. Yes, it may feel a bit like you’re micro-managing yourself for a while, but remember it will take as long as 300 days to cement your routine into a habit, so you need to make sure that you nurture these new practices. So they become second nature!

And don’t forget, you can always use our free Routine Reset mini-program to help you walk through this process step-by-step!

Final Thoughts on Transformation to a New, Positive, Post-Pandemic You

Despite the challenges of this past year — and let’s be honest, it WAS challenging. It has also been a time rich in opportunity and one that has shown us all our potential. It’s given us all the gift of a reset, a fresh start, and a blank slate.

What will you do with yours?

I hope that you will be intentional and craft a routine and existence that will not just help you reach your goals but help you live a more purposeful life!

Unexpected Job Loss Becomes a Woman’s Greatest Blessing

June 7, 2021 by Kristen Lawrence

Unfortunately, job loss is a part of life, but knowing this doesn’t make it any less hurtful or scary when it happens to us. However, even if it feels like the end of the world, sometimes beautiful new beginnings come from painful endings. Jesse Devine, a former artistic director, and theatre instructor learned this firsthand when she lost her dream job in 2018.

An opportunity of a lifetime

“You know that feeling like you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be? Like where your feet are planted is exactly where they were always meant to be?” Jesse said. “When I walked into that theatre’s lobby, it was that kind of knowing in my soul and the job description felt like it had been created for me.”

While waiting to hear back about the job, she finally got a call back from the theatre one day. Jesse felt like her heart stopped, like the whole world had stopped at that moment. She anxiously anticipated the answer she would receive on the other end of the line. However, she got a pleasant surprise. Indeed, she heard the words she was hoping for.

“We’d like to offer you the position of Artistic Director,” they said.

Jesse thanked the woman calling, holding back tears of joy and excitement. After hanging up, she immediately called her husband and dad to tell them the wonderful news. She felt like she was the star of her own real-life movie, and every experience she’d had finally made sense. To her, it felt like she found home at last.

A sudden and unexpected job loss

“Skip to almost a decade later – May 21st, 2018, 10:10 AM… – when a big part of my identity, that job, was taken away.”

They told her they wanted to go in a different direction, and Jesse was completely shocked and heartbroken. She couldn’t breathe and didn’t even know if she wanted to anymore. Feeling like a criminal, she got escorted out of the theatre for the last time. As she put the last box in her car, she heard them redo the keycode on the door behind her.

“295-ish nights a year of great programming, produced in the black, on a salary that kept myself and all those I supervised very much in the red,” she said. “50 to 70 hour work weeks, years without healthcare and/or benefits, and yet here I was, out on the curb with the trash.”

She’d taken the job for her love of theatre and drama, not the benefits or pay. So, the unexpected job loss hit her even harder, because it hadn’t been just a job – it became her identity.

“What would I do? What do you do when you lose your identity?” she thought. “Well, at first I did nothing. The relative silence of a community I loved and I dedicated myself to make doing anything more than breathing impossible.”

Job loss can spur an identity crisis

Of course, eventually she got tired of mulling over the past, so she tapped into her artistic side. She wanted an answer to how she could move on with her life and recreate herself to feel whole again. So, she dug deep into herself, taking the puzzle apart piece by piece. Day after day, she brainstormed and soul-searched, trying to figure out where to go from there.

“I went down YouTube rabbit holes, which led to TED Talks, podcasts, audiobooks. This led to new questions, which eventually led me to asking the right question of myself,” she said. “Spoiler alert – looking for answers within really does help!”

She realized that identity isn’t defined by a person, place, thing, or job. Suddenly, she had an epiphany that a sense of self comes from “what we bring to every person, place, or thing that we interact with.”

She felt like she finally wanted to breathe again, if her idea of identity could manifest into reality. Going from there, she thought deeply about what she brought to the table that no one else did. What could she offer the world?

In letters she kept for decades, she found her answer. Her former colleagues, employers, employees, and students helped her realize what made her stand out.

“Their words helped me reclaim my real identity, and what my soul once knew,” she said. “I brought two non-negotiables: 1) a fierce determination to fight for and stand by the underdog, no matter what the consequences and 2) an ability to find and bring out that special spark in someone. A spark that I believe everyone has.”

“I give it oxygen, I help it to grow. I’m a firestarter, and this identity – it can’t be lost or taken away or taken in a different direction because it lies within,” Jesse realized.

She could finally catch her breath after finding her answer.

Job loss happens to the best of us, because nothing in this life lasts forever. We can’t always plan for something like that to happen, but it doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It just means you’re ready for something better, and the universe intervened for you.

Jesse explained:

“People, places, jobs – they’ve always come and gone and they will continue to – no matter how much we love them and wish it weren’t so. So choose it to define and root our identities as something that lies within us that can’t be taken away.”

If you define your identity outside of your job, you’ll always have something to build from when everything around you crumbles. This realization led Jesse to discover her true self – the fire starter.

“The indestructible identity within us all – it’s no small matter. It’s ALL that matters. Because the world needs everyone’s spark, especially now.”

Jesse hopes that her story can help someone out there breathe again and remember their true identity. Her experience shows that even if you’ve lost your dream job, you can find light at the end of the tunnel. Perhaps a job loss can open a new door, a new opportunity, that sparks the fire in your soul even brighter than before.

Yoga Teacher Shows Every Student How to Live Their Best Life

June 7, 2021 by Kristen Lawrence

Living your best life looks different for everyone, and for some, yoga makes life worth living. Robin Martin, an international yoga teacher, living in Seattle, helps others find their spark in life through this ancient science. She’s been practicing it for about 20 years now, and she says that there are both physical and mental benefits. Robin has noticed these benefits in herself and her students as well.

“I focus on my teaching in joint longevity. So, healthy joints that carry you through a lifetime of physical health, and of course, the mental benefits are moving meditation, and the opportunity to just kind of let go of things going on in the world. When the world is especially challenging, it’s really nice to just kind of shove things off for a little while.”

How yoga can help you live your best life

Studies on yoga have reported on many of these mental and physical benefits. A new study found that 89% of people practicing yoga saw a reduction in chronic pain symptoms. Yoga helps strengthen and stretch the joints, which gets the energy flowing in the body again. Once your energy becomes more balanced, instances of pain or discomfort start to lessen.

Yoga also decreases stress, a huge complaint in today’s world. Many studies have shown that yoga lowers cortisol levels, helping practitioners feel more relaxed and at ease. In fact, women in a three-month-long yoga program had lower cortisol, anxiety, depression, and fatigue.

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A post shared by Robin Martin (@robinmartinyoga)

Reduced inflammation

Chronic inflammation is also a growing problem, an epidemic even in our modern world. Our unhealthy diets, stressful lifestyles, lack of sleep, and imbalanced living, in general, promotes inflammation. This can lead to diseases such as cancer, heart disease, and diabetes. However, yoga can reduce inflammatory markers significantly.

A 2015 study divided 218 participants into two groups: yogis and non-yogis. Both groups performed moderate and intense exercises to test their stress levels. At the end of the study, the yogis had lower levels of inflammatory markers than non-yogis.

Better sleep

Yoga can even improve your sleep quality, a lifestyle factor that many people need help with today. In a 2005 study, 69 elderly patients were told to either do yoga or take an herbal supplement or were placed in a control group. The yoga group ended up falling asleep faster, sleeping longer and feeling more rejuvenated than the other two groups.

Another study looked at how yoga impacted sleep in patients with lymphoma. They found that yoga reduced sleep disturbances, improved sleep quality, and duration and reduced the need for sleep medications. Though scientists are still not sure how it works, yoga helps increase melatonin levels, regulating sleep cycles.

Improves mental illness

Finally, yoga can cause significant changes in certain chemicals in the brain that lower mental illness risk. In a Boston University study, scientists performed brain scans on 19 volunteers: eight seasoned yogis and 11 non-yogis. The brain scans were done using advanced magnetic resonance spectroscopic imaging to measure gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA) levels. People with anxiety and depression usually do not have enough of this chemical.

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A post shared by Robin Martin (@robinmartinyoga)

Scientists took the scans at the beginning of the experiment. Afterward, the yoga group participated in an hour-long yoga session, while the other group read a book. Researchers performed another scan after the groups finished their activities. What they found was remarkable, to say the least.

“We showed a 27 percent increase in the brain GABA levels of those doing yoga – a really significant increase,” said Dr. Chris Streeter, professor of psychiatry and neurology at Boston University School of Medicine. Researchers didn’t notice any change in GABA levels for those who read the book.

These are just a handful of the wonderful benefits you can enjoy from a regular yoga practice. Robin says she definitely notices a difference when she hasn’t practiced in a few days.

How Robin is living her best life with yoga

“I stay motivated to continue to practice yoga because I know that if I don’t, I fall into sometimes depression, sometimes anxiety,” Robin says.

She also says that when she doesn’t practice, she notices her body doesn’t feel refreshed or vibrant. However, she usually notices the mental aspects first when she goes a few days without practicing.

“If I’m not moving and I’m not breathing, I tend to just not feel well, so that is enough to keep me motivated and keep me moving in my practice,” Robin says.

If you’re starting, you don’t have to feel pressured to do any difficult poses. Go at your own pace, and let your body and mind ease into the practice. There are many types of yoga, but most beginners start with Hatha yoga. This consists of holding poses for a longer time period than the Vinyasa style, which focuses on moving through many poses relatively quickly.

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A post shared by Robin Martin (@robinmartinyoga)

“The most rewarding thing about what I do is to share a practice that I know really has a big impact on people mentally as well as physically. It’s really pretty amazing to know that after an hour or so of moving your body, how much you can clear your mind, relax your thoughts, let go of anxiety, let go of stress, and end up more physically well.”

Final thoughts: yoga offers many benefits to your mind and body, helping you achieve your best life

Robin and many other yogis around the world can attest to the amazing benefits of yoga. Not only does it help relax your mind and reduce symptoms of mental illness, but it also lowers stress in the body as well. People everywhere can improve their quality of life by adding a simple 30 minute or hour-long routine into their day.

The point of yoga is to unite your individual consciousness with the universal consciousness, or Spirit. By priming your body with yoga poses, you can improve your mental and physical health, helping you sit longer in meditation. However, if you aren’t interested in that aspect of yoga, you can still experience a better quality of life through the practice.

Great Dane Helps a Woman Overcome Loneliness

June 6, 2021 by Kristen Lawrence

Most people have experienced loneliness at some point, and have gotten through it with the help of their furry friends. One woman who adopted a beautiful blue Great Dane found this out firsthand when she felt isolated and alone. Her dog Iris gave her friendship when she needed it the most, and they now have an unbreakable bond.

Stacy moved from Canada to the U.S. to live with her husband, but she didn’t know anyone else in the country. Since she didn’t have friends or family here and had a lot of free time, she often felt bored and lonely. After a while, she felt like she’d go crazy from the isolation, so she brought up getting a dog to her husband.

“Growing up, I had never had a dog before, so Iris was my first dog,” Stacy said. They quickly fell in love with each other and became best friends.

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A post shared by •I R I S•T H E• G R E A T DANE (@iristhebluegreatdane) on Jun 21, 2020 at 2:12pm PDT

What Stacy loves the most about her Great Dane

“I would say the most rewarding thing about being a pet owner is seeing how happy you are making this loving little being that you are fully and entirely responsible for. And, knowing what you are doing is making them happy and giving them a comfortable, safe, enjoyable life.”

Stacy feels that taking care of Iris gives her a sense of purpose, and she loves the bond they share. She enjoys loving and caring for her Great Dane, because she knows it makes a huge difference in her life. They make a perfect pair and spend much of their days together. No matter if they’re taking a nap, throwing a Frisbee or just watching TV, they enjoy every memory made.

“I’m with Iris pretty much all day, every day, so when it comes to one favorite memory it’s kind of hard – but, one of my favorite things is when my parents come to visit or we drive together to Canada, me and Iris.”

Stacy says they also enjoy long walks together and have trained Iris to walk off leash. They either walk in the neighborhood or take advantage of the local trails near their house. While Indianapolis doesn’t offer many off-leash options, they have found a few places to take Iris. Either way, Stacy says the training was a good investment for the times they can let Iris roam freely.

“She loves walking through the water – I’ll go knee-deep, she’ll go knee-deep, which is about the same depth of water. She is actually taller than me on her hind legs!”

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A post shared by •I R I S•T H E• G R E A T DANE (@iristhebluegreatdane) on Jan 30, 2020 at 4:06am PST

A gentle giant of a dog

You can see this in the video posted below. Great Danes can stand at over 6 feet tall on their hind legs, so they know who’s boss! They’re definitely the “top dog” in most households. They also have a habit of taking up the entire couch or bed due to their large frame, so be prepared if you get one!

“My number one piece of advice for anyone looking to bring an animal into their home would definitely be to match their lifestyle to yours. So, even though Great Danes are very lazy, they miss their humans a lot when the humans leave them. They don’t do well for long periods of time left alone.”

This explains the relationship between Iris and Stacy, as Iris can’t stand even a minute without her mom. They have a very tight bond due to all their time they spend together. Great Danes may look a little intimidating, but they’re well-known for being sweet and loyal to their owners!

Here are some interesting facts about this beautiful dog breed:

They’re known for being “gentle giants”
The modern Great Dane was bred in Germany to hunt boars.
They’re the tallest dogs in the world. Males can reach up to 32 inches in the shoulders, and females 30 inches. Males can weigh up to 175 pounds and females usually get to 140 pounds.
Great Danes make wonderful family dogs due to their loving, patient, gentle demeanor.
They need daily exercise – a couple brisk walks should suffice. Though you may think you need to run a marathon due to their size, they actually tire quickly. (Great Danes can be a bit lazy).
They live on average 7 to 10 years.
Obedience classes are vital when they’re puppies, as their sheer size makes them harder to control as adults.

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A post shared by •I R I S•T H E• G R E A T DANE (@iristhebluegreatdane) on Jun 30, 2019 at 8:26am PDT

Do you want a Great Dane?

If you have a lot of room in your home, Great Danes can make wonderful pets! Iris helped Stacy overcome loneliness and give her a best friend in her new city. She also showers her with love and affection, and Stacy returns it ten times over. They truly make the perfect duo and seem to enjoy every second they get to spend together.

Loneliness can strike when we least expect it, and it’s often our furry friends who give us the love we need. When the world shuts us out, we can always count on our pets to give us the unconditional love and support we need!

10 Strategies to Break Bad News with Compassion

June 6, 2021 by Power of Positivity

Giving bad news to someone is never easy, and there’s no suitable method to go about it.

Thankfully, you can improve your communication skills to make the situation easier for them and you. How you break the news differs depending on whether you’re speaking to a child or an adult.

For starters, you want to make sure that your delivery is good. Your tone can mean everything when it comes to giving the message. When you are precise and calm in your delivery, those receiving it will clearly understand what you’re trying to tell them.

Did you know that people often model your behavior when they are being confronted? If you come at them in a combative tone, then they are likely to return the attitude. You can expect some opposition or push back if you’re firing someone, but you won’t get the same type of response if you’re telling a person of their relative’s passing.

When breaking bad news, you want to make sure that you use compassion and empathy. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes for just a minute and see how you would react. The individual knows that you can’t resolve their problem, but they will want to feel like you understand their feelings.

Five Tips on Breaking Bad News to A Child

One of the hardest things you will do in life is breaking bad news to children. The challenging aspect is that they don’t understand because their maturity level is not that of yours. The age of the child plays a part in how you will talk to them about the matter.

Children can feel the emotions of their parents and those around them even if they don’t have the ability to grasp what’s going on. The goal is to explain it to them in the most simplistic way possible. When dealing with grade school kids, they don’t need excessive details as their brains cannot process such data.

However, by the time a child gets to be around ten years of age, they can have more meaningful conversations with you, so you don’t have to beat around the bush. Here are some tips on how to break the bad news to children.

1. Be Honest

Many people think that children can’t handle the truth, but what they can’t handle is being lied to. If you learn anything today, remember that children will always find out if you’re lying. If their beloved pet died, don’t tell them they ran away or some other made-up tale.

Sit down and discuss life and death with them; after all, death is just as much a part of life as living. When you’re not honest, you can allow their little minds to try to invent fantasy explanations that can be downright frightening to them. What if a parent lost a job and the child is going to be forced to move?

Moving can be quite terrifying to a child, but what they need from their parent is to know that they have a lovely, warm house waiting on them. The job loss, even to a kid, can be overwhelming. They need to hear from you that everything is going to be okay.

2. Don’t Overwhelm Them with Details

Your child doesn’t need all the particulars about the situation. If you and your spouse are getting a divorce, they don’t need to know if there were infidelity and substance abuse issues. They need to know that they are still loved and will be taken care of regardless of what happens.

They also need to know that mommy or daddy will still be an active part of their life. Being truthful doesn’t mean that you must say everything you know. If that parent has done wrong things, let your child form their conclusions later in life.

It’s never wise to badmouth a spouse because it will only make the situation worse for the child who loves them.

3. Give Them A Chance to Speak

Don’t just drop a bomb on a child and then walk away. They need to be given a chance to speak. It’s quite therapeutic for a child to get what they’re thinking out in the open.

Don’t assume that just because they’re younger that they don’t understand, because most kids understand more than what you think. The last thing that you want to do is allow them to harbor resentment and to develop ill feelings about the issue later.

4. Repeat Important Information Twice

The point must get across to the child, so you may need to repeat parts of what you say twice. Children only can ingest so much at one time, so repeating the important parts ensures that they receive the news. If the key topic is divorce, reiterate that you’re getting a divorce, but they will always be loved and cared for.

5. Show Affection

Depending on the child and the situation, it’s usually appropriate to follow up horrible news with an outward expression of affection. If you just told your little girl that you are divorcing their other parent, they need a hug to help solidify the feeling that they’re okay. Keep an eye on them afterward as children can become depressed too.

Five Hints for Breaking Bad News to Adults

Giving some horrible news to an adult is a different ballgame than delivering it to a child. Adults can handle the big topics, but that doesn’t mean that they don’t need empathy and kindness. Here are some tips on how to break horrible news to adults with compassion.

1. Try Not to Blindside Them

In some respects, there is no way to avoid blindsiding a person with horrible news. However, if you can give them advance notice, it may help. People who are given bad news without warning often react negatively.

2. Make Sure You’re In A Comfortable Environment

The environment you deliver the news in is also essential. When dealing with private and hurtful things, you don’t want to tell them in a restaurant that’s full for the dinner rush. Use tact and pick a place where you can talk candidly and privately, so they are not forced to deal with emotions publicly.

3. Use Tactful Wording

Choose your words wisely. It’s okay if you rehearse your speech in front of a mirror before giving it to them. If you’re telling your spouse that you’re leaving and are in love with another person, then you certainly want to choose your words wisely.

If you come to them in an overly emotional state, then they will return the emotions. Try to be calm, cool, and collective. Some topics will invoke an explosion of emotions no matter how tactful your wording, but you must do the best you can with the situation.

4. Have Tissues Ready

If you will deliver life-altering news, it helps if you have the tissues ready. Learning that a mother or father has passed is devastating, and there will be tears. Please give them a shoulder to cry on and let them know that you’re there for them.

The worst thing you can do is compare your grief to theirs because even if you lost your parent, you don’t know how they feel. Your emotions and feelings are different, and it’s not helpful to soothe someone by telling them that you understand their pain. It can make some people mad if you’ve never experienced it, and you try to make such parallels.

5. Follow Up with Them Later

If you’ve dealt a devastating blow to someone with some bad news, don’t just leave them alone. You need to check back in with them later. If you just told someone that their spouse was cheating or their parent died, then you need to do a follow-up. Grief can do all sorts of things to the emotions, and if someone already has mental health issues, they can become suicidal or very depressed.

Check on this person in a few hours, and then keep in contact with them in the upcoming days. If they’re dealing with a devastating situation, then they will need your friendship and compassion to help them get through the mountain they’re facing.

Final Thoughts on Delivering Bad News with Compassion and Grace

Whether dealing with an adult or a child, there’s no easy way to tell someone news that will alter their life. Above all else, use empathy and kindness because you never know when it will be your turn to get such shattering news. Life changes and things happen that alter your destiny continuously, but your ability to help others through these times will speak about you as a person.

When it’s your turn to receive bad news, the same kindness that you extend to others will come back to you. Some situations are not easy to handle no matter how eloquently someone delivers the news, but you can show them love and support to make the difficult time easier to handle.

20 Tattoo Meanings Most People Don’t Know

June 6, 2021 by Power of Positivity

Getting a tattoo is a serious matter. Sure, some people have a wild night out where they get a tattoo they regret the following day, but you don’t want to be that person. Most people get a tattoo that means something important to them. That’s why it’s good to know the meaning of tattoos.

Not all tattoos have underlying meanings, but enough of them do that you’ll probably want to take the time to learn about them. This article has 20 tattoo meanings that many people aren’t aware of. Read through these so you’ll be prepared for your first or next tattoo appointment.

A Brief History of Tattoos

Tattoos aren’t just really fantastic body art that people recently started getting. They date back to ancient times; researchers and archaeologists believe that they date back as far as 4,000 B.C. in ancient Egypt. The evidence of this is found in ancient figurines and tomb scenes.

In ancient Egypt, tattoos were mainly for women to protect them when giving birth. In ancient Greece and ancient Rome, they were for both genders and indicated that the person belonged to a specific religion or sect. During ancient times in what is now South America, people, especially women, often had large, ornate tattoos.

Over in ancient China, during the Han dynasty, officials often put on the face of criminals to indicate that they are a danger to society. In some cases, they also marked Chinese heroes as such.

In ancient Japan, starting around A.D 3, people began to see tattoos positively, and men would adorn themselves with beautiful tattoo art. Native Americans often had tattoos on their faces and arms.

Tattoos were common in many different cultures worldwide, and in each culture, they had very specific meanings. Today, some tattoos are simply novelty art, but most hold specific meanings and/or purposes. The following section will highlight 20 tattoo meanings you may not know about.

20 Tattoo Meanings That Are Unknown to Most People

These symbols are popular for a reason!

1. Swallows

These birds were often symbols for sailors. The number of swallows could indicate how many successful voyages a sailor has taken. There were usually seen in pairs to show when the sailor set off and another to mark his return home. It’s also thought that if the sailor drowns at sea, the swallow can take their soul to heaven.

2. The Diving Girl

This tattoo is a bit more modern and is a traditional American tattoo. It’s believed to be a variation or evolution of the Jantzen Swimwear Company’s logo. The significance is that this company made women’s first form-fitting, activewear style swimsuits. Before that, women’s swimsuits were oversized, baggy, and unsuitable for swimming. In a sense, the diving woman can be seen as a token of women’s liberation from being covered up all the time.

3. Unalome

This is an ancient Buddhist symbol that indicates a spiritual journey towards enlightenment. The spiral design indicates life’s turmoil during the person’s quest, while the straight line indicates that the wearer has found the path and achieved enlightenment.

4. Butterfly

Butterfly tattoos are immensely popular, especially among women. However, they have a deep meaning in addition to their beauty and vivid colors. In Native American culture, a butterfly is a spirit animal that represents transformation. It’s a great tattoo for someone who has improved their life.

5. Doves

Throughout time, doves have often been recognized as symbols of spiritual peace. They are often paired with rest-in-peace imagery to symbolize that the spirit of the deceased is at peace and has been whisked away to heaven. The soft cooing of these birds is also associated with peace since it can create a calming effect.

If you see doves often, this is what it means.

6. Na Maha Samred

This detailed tattoo is a symbol of success. Some say it’s a symbol of power. These meanings can be combined to mean, “the more successful you are in life, the more powerful you become.”

7. Maple Leaves

Maple leaves aren’t a popular tattoo and it’s probably because most people don’t know that they have a deep meaning. In China and Japan, a red maple leaf symbolizes beauty and love. It’s also a symbol of sexuality and the sweetness of love. The tattoo meanings of maple leaf designs could be that the person is very sexual or very romantic.

8. Lighthouses

This is another tattoo that stems from sailors. Lighthouses represent guidance, hope, and comfort for sailors. Getting a lighthouse tattoo is a way for people to remind themselves that life won’t always be stormy and grey. The tattoo helps them to look forward to calm, sunny days.

9. Fox

The fox is another Native American spirit animal. You may have heard the saying, “as sharp as a fox.” This comes from the Native American belief that the fox represents anticipation, observation, and stealth. In fact, foxes are often portrayed this way in modern culture.

10. Gungnir

This symbol is from Norse mythology. It is the name of the spear of Odin, the mighty Norse God which may be the most popular God out of all ancient mythology. A tattoo of the Gungnir represents many of the traits associated with Odin. The most popular characteristics are wisdom, healing, war, and victory.

See nine tattoos that are actually fantastic scar cover-ups.

11. Eye of Horus

In ancient Egyptian lore, Horus was the love child of Osiris (who was brought back from the dead) and Isis. He got revenge for his father’s death, losing his eye in the process. His sight was restored with a magic eye. One of the most common interpretations of this tattoo is a reawakening of your health. It can also be seen as dominating over your enemies.

12. Kwatakye Atiko (also called Gyawu Atiko)

This is an adinkra symbol from the Ghana culture. This West African symbol is said to be the hairstyle of an Asante war hero. It represents bravery and fearlessness. Tattoo meanings featuring this symbol indicate someone who is brave, truthful, and honorable. A soldier would be a great example.

13. Eye of Providence

This is a famous symbol you often see in art and fashion. While it is very recognizable, many people don’t know its meaning. It symbolizes the eye of God and represents the fact that God has his eye on his people. It’s one of the more obvious tattoo meanings you’ll come across.

14. Sword

Sword tattoos are popular because they’re just really cool, but many people don’t know what a sword (or a sword tattoo) represents. The most obvious representation is a warrior or a knight, but it’s a little deeper than that. It represents honor, chivalry, strength, power, authority, and protection. It can also express the desire for justice.

15. The Chinese Symbol for Friendship

Chinese symbols are trendy for tattoos. However, some people get them without knowing the meaning. Chinese characters themselves don’t necessarily have a “deep” meaning. They are a part of the Mandarin language. However, if you pair it with some other symbol or intricate design, it could represent deep tattoo meanings for the person wearing it.

16. Bald Eagle Tattoos

As the national bird of the United States, the bald eagle symbolizes freedom and the ability to soar to new heights. A bald eagle tattoo is a way to show American patriotism. It’s also a way to indicate that the person is determined to be the best they can be in life.

17. Turtle

You may not have ever thought of getting a turtle tattoo unless you’re into The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. However, in Native American culture, a turtle is a spirit animal representing good health and long life. This makes sense because turtles can live for hundreds of years.

18. The Blessing

This is a Wiccan symbol that represents the blessing of the moon goddess. It’s similar to the more popular Triple Goddess symbol; the three teardrops represent the Mother, the Maiden, and the Crone, just as the Triple Goddess symbol does.

19. The Pentacle

Some people mistakenly associate this symbol with evil or dark magic. It is actually a symbol of protection. This represents the four elements, and the fifth star point represents the wearer.

20. Egyptian Scarab

In modern times, people see the beetle as a destructive creature associated with villains or evil. In ancient Egypt, the scarab represented renewal and rebirth. They were also related to the rebirth of the sun each day. As a tattoo, it can be a symbol of spiritual rejuvenation for the wearer.

Final Thoughts on Understanding Tattoo Meanings

Tattoos are an art form that is only limited by the skill of the tattoo artist. More often than not, people get tattoos that represent personal meanings. However, it helps to know what certain symbols or images mean historically or culturally so the tattoo can make sense.

If you’re looking for something that hasn’t been done a million times, these 20 tattoo meanings and symbols are a great place to start. Not only have you sparked some new ideas by reading this, but you’ve increased your knowledge. Hopefully, this information has helped spark your creativity for your next tattoo.

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Therapy Dog Sheds 100 Pounds and Leads a Healthier Life

June 5, 2021 by Kristen Lawrence

Kai, a golden retriever/lab mix therapy dog, lost a whopping 100 pounds in just a year. He now gets to live a fuller, happier life as a result of his huge weight loss transformation. At one point, his weight made it hard for him to even walk. But now, he can run and play like a normal dog.

His story began when his previous owners brought him to the vet last March and found out he weighed 173 pounds. The vet said they’d have to put him down. Instead, his owners took him to a local animal rescue. From there, his foster mom Pam adopted him, helping him lose the excess weight. She wanted him to enjoy life again. Kai’s vet monitored his weight loss closely, making sure he stayed healthy in the process.

A new family for Kai

“When I first met him, I was just amazed that he could still be so kind and loving when he had to be in a lot of pain,” Pam said. She also said that Kai couldn’t do any normal things that most dogs did when he was overweight. “He couldn’t run, he couldn’t play at the park.”

Seeing that he needed help, Pam decided to foster him and help him lose 100 pounds. Once he lost all the weight, she said he could finally enjoy life and do normal dog activities again. It broke her heart to see him struggle so much when she first met him. She said that it took two or three people to lift him. Also, he could only walk 5 or 10 steps before he got too tired.

To lose the extra weight, they went on a lot of walks together, and Pam made sure to feed him a healthy diet. She also went to lakes and other places with water, so Kai would have some resistance training by walking through it.

Kai becomes a certified therapy dog

After he lost the weight, Pam said she signed him up to become a certified therapy dog so he could do hospital visits. Aside from making people smile at the hospitals, he also enjoys going to the dog park. Other activities he loves include playing with his dog siblings and eating fruits such as bananas, strawberries, and blueberries. Kai truly lives his best life now after his dramatic weight loss transformation.

“Nothing makes him happier than dinner time when he knows he’s gonna be fed, and he loves to go on road trips,” Pam said.

Pam says that if you’ve ever thought about fostering or adopting, you should try it because it helps dogs find loving homes. “Fostering is a really great way – it’s like trying on a pair of shoes – and you decide whether that’s the perfect fit for you.”

While Pam initially just fostered Kai, he seemed to fit in wonderfully with her and her family, so she adopted him. Her decision to make him a part of her family transformed Kai’s life forever, both physically and emotionally.

“He is literally always happy, and I am just so grateful that his owners chose to surrender him instead of having him put down. I’m eternally grateful to have him as a part of our family.”

Kai seems to have the best mom ever, who takes him on beautiful hikes all over their home country of Canada. Here, they explored Elk Island National Park in Edmonton:

“Spent an amazing afternoon hiking and sightseeing at #elkislandnationalpark
We hiked Lakeview Trail (Astotin Lake), and then we did Moss Lake Trail. The weather was a little bit of everything- sun, rain, and even a little hail.

The Bison were out and so beautiful. Our hike to Mud Lake was cut short due to a herd- and since we’re in their home, mom said respect is key. If you look closely, you can see them in the trees. Some were really close to the road- so close up photos.”

Kai gets a new friend.

A few months ago, Pam decided to foster another overweight dog named Woody. She wants to help him become his best self, too, just like she did with Kai!

“I’ve got some BIG news – everyone meet my new foster brother, Woody! Woody tips the scales at an unbelievable 209 lbs (95.2 kgs). I’m going to help him on his weight loss journey- I kinda know a thing or two about that.”

Pam says he should weigh around half that, but she will help him get there little by little. Will Woody also become a therapy dog?

Does your dog need to lose weight?

Luckily, both of these dogs have an amazing owner who helped them have better, healthier lives. Sadly, many dogs suffer from overweight or obesity in our modern world. If you own dogs, please remember that they need a healthy diet and regular exercise just like humans do. Your dog’s vet can answer any questions you may have about recommended foods or supplements for your specific dog breed.

All dogs deserve to live a happy, long life, and we can play a big part in that. Dogs love humans unconditionally, so we should do the best we can to give them that love back. If you enjoy outdoor activities, take your dog with you! It gives a perfect opportunity for bonding time as well as exercise for your fluffy friend. Or, even a walk around the neighborhood will help your dog stay in shape and get out of the house a little.

What kinds of activities or adventures do you enjoy with your dog(s)? Share with us in the comments!

Psychology Explains How Daydreaming Reduces Anxiety

June 5, 2021 by Power of Positivity

Sometimes you need to get away from it all. Daydreaming is a great way to do this if you can’t physically get away. Fantasizing about something that makes you happy…well, makes you happy.

Sometimes it can be taboo – it comes with a notion that you’re wasting time or not being efficient. However, it can be healthy for you and has other perks. In this article, you’ll learn how it reduces anxiety.

What is Daydreaming?

You probably already know that daydreaming is when you sit or lay somewhere, stare off into space, and imagine being somewhere else, doing something else, or being someone else. It’s where you fantasize about your wildest dreams. It’s where you imagine a private alternative life in your head where you’re delighted and free of judgment.

This is a perfect description, but, scientifically speaking, it goes deeper than that. Dr. Eric Klinger, professor of psychology at the University of Minnesota, says that daydreaming helps reveal your goals, innermost desires, and fears. It’s safe to say that having daydreams helps to keep you mentally focused and balanced.

Benefits of Daydreams

Having daydreams regularly can offer you several benefits besides the ones mentioned above. While the benefits are mostly related to mental and emotional health, improving these two can improve physical health. Some of these benefits include:

Decreased stress
Improved memory
Better mood
Increased creativity
Enhanced performance and improved productivity

With all these benefits, it should be no surprise that having daydreams is a great way to reduce anxiety. It’s almost like a holistic and natural approach to better health. As long as daydreaming doesn’t become interruptive to your life, it’s a great way to escape your stressors temporarily.

Downsides of Having Daydreams

There are a bit of controversy surrounding daydreams. While most psychologists agree that there are benefits to fantasizing about your desires, some say that daydreaming may cause more harm than good. Some psychologists believe that having daydreams is indicative of a mental illness.

Before you panic, keep in mind that these psychologists who believe that having daydreams is harmful to refer to people who daydream excessively. Some believe excessive daydreams could signify concentration difficulties, which occur in many mental illnesses. You should be fine if you aren’t zoning out in the middle of important tasks.

There is also an issue of having daydreams about bad things. This is known as intrusive thoughts. You may dream of a loved one or yourself dying or committing suicide. You may dream that some random disaster will occur or that you’d catch some random, deadly disease. Psychologists say this is a sign of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD).

If your daydreams are along these lines, you need to get help. However, if they’re harmless, they can be helpful in your daily life.

How Daydreaming Reduces Anxiety

When discussing how daydreams reduce anxiety, it will be under the assumption that you’re having good daydreams, not intrusive thoughts. Because daydreams and fantasizing offer so many mental health benefits, it’s no surprise they relieve anxiety. Here is some background on anxiety, which will help you understand why daydreaming helps relieve it.

What is Anxiety?

Anxiety is a natural response that your body gives when you are stressed. It’s that feeling you get before a first date, on a job interview, or before a major test. You may sweat, have a rapid heartbeat, and feel uneasy.

Anxiety has a bad reputation, but it’s not necessarily bad. Anxiety was (and still can be) a survival mechanism that the human body developed to protect itself from danger. It causes a release of adrenaline that prepares you for the fight-or-flight scenario.

In ancient times, this was helpful when humans were trying to survive the wild, but the fight or flight response isn’t needed for dates and interviews in modern times. Unfortunately, anxiety doesn’t know this, so it’s still there.

Anxiety can sometimes be irritating and unwelcome, especially if you are doused in a bucket of sweat. However, whether it’s good or bad depends on how often you get anxious, how anxious you get, and how you handle anxiety.

Anxiety vs. Anxiety Disorder

There is anxiety, and then there are anxiety disorders. A little anxiety is okay, but it can be called a disorder when it becomes debilitating. While having daydreams helps people suffering from anxiety and anxiety disorders, it’s most needed for people suffering from disorders.

There are many types of anxiety disorders:

Generalized anxiety disorder (GAD)
Panic disorder
Separation anxiety disorder
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
Phobias
Social anxiety disorder
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)
Illness anxiety disorder

According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA), anxiety disorders are America’s top mental health illness. It affects 40 million adults in the U.S., but only about 37% receive treatment. Phobias are the top anxiety disorder affecting Americans, while social anxiety disorder comes second.

Even if a person is suffering from a disorder instead of regular anxiety, it’s easily treatable. Having daydreams isn’t a replacement for medical/professional treatment, but it helps.

Relieving Anxiety with Daydreams

This section is the meat and potatoes of the article. Having daydreams can relieve the symptoms of anxiety as well as how often a person may experience anxiety. Here is for ways how daydreams do this.

1. It can make you happier.

Fantasizing about things that make you happy can make you happy, even if those things aren’t real. Being happier helps to reduce the effect that stressors have on your psyche. The happier you are, the more things can “roll off of you.” When you can shake things off so easily, they are less likely to make you anxious.

2. You’ll have a safe space.

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs indicates that feeling safe is a basic human need. According to Maslow, the needs above safety (psychological and self-fulfillment) can’t be met until the need for safety is met. As you can imagine, a person whose psychological needs aren’t being met will have a high risk of suffering from anxiety disorders.

Having daydreams is a way that a person can create a safe space. This is extremely important for people who may not feel that they have a safe space in real life. While fantasies should never replace real life, it’s okay to retreat to a safe space until you can have one in real life. It’s a survival mechanism that can get people through the toughest times.

3. You can let your creativity run wild.

Many people have so many thoughts and ideas jumbled up in their brains. While these creative thoughts aren’t bad, constantly having your brain clogged up with repeated thoughts and ideas can lead to stress and exhaustion. This can cause a person to have a higher risk of anxiety.

The best way to stop this is to get it all out. Having daydreams is a great way to let your imagination run wild without being judged. Not only will it clear your mind, but it can lead to some of the best ideas you’ve ever had.

4. You may reveal things about yourself you weren’t aware of.

Having daydreams is a bit like meditating, except that you aren’t clearing your mind. You’re letting it roam. You would be surprised at how much your unconscious mind holds. When you’re aware, you might be blocking these unconscious thoughts, but letting your mind roam in a safe space that you’ve created can allow these unconscious thoughts to reveal themselves.

You may discover needs that aren’t being met, things in your living or working area that’s making you unhappy, issues that may be affecting your health, and more. Discovering these things allows you to fix them, leading to an environment and lifestyle less likely to trigger anxiety.

Final Thoughts on Daydreaming

There are so many opinions, both professional and amateur, about daydreaming. Some people say having daydreams are good, while others think it’s bad. Psychologists even say that it can indicate mental illness.

The truth is that anything is bad for you if you do it too much. If you allow daydreaming to interfere in your daily functioning or if you replace reality with fantasy, then yes, it’s a problem. However, if you escape into your fantasies for a little while to get away from stress, having daydreams can be unbelievably valuable.

As long as your daydreams are kept under control, it can be beneficial for your health. There is no debate about whether it can help with anxiety or not – done in small doses; it can be as relaxing as a massage. Plus, the other benefits you get from daydreams make it even more worthwhile. Don’t be afraid to try it – it’s normal, and most people already have daydreams anyway.

Motivated by his Children, Man Loses Over 150 Pounds

June 5, 2021 by Kristen Lawrence

When you feel motivated, it makes it much easier to create the habits and lifestyle you need to achieve your goals. Robert Glover, also known as “The X-Fat Boy Ambassador,” wanted to get healthy to be a good example for his kids. As he trained in the gym and ate more nutritious foods, he saw the pounds start to melt away. In total, he ended up losing around 150 pounds, transforming both his mind and body.

He knew he had to make some changes after dealing with mental and physical health problems. Motivated by his children as well, he started to incorporate healthier habits into his life.

“I was depressed. I was dealing with anxiety, and I really drastically needed to make a change in my life.”

Of course, making such a dramatic change in his life wasn’t easy, but he stuck with it. He started looking into a healthy lifestyle, and just kept learning more as he progressed. However, in the beginning, he said he encountered major challenges since he had no idea what he was doing.

I didn’t know anything about good nutrition; I didn’t know anything about exercise,” he said. “But, the more research I did, the more fit friends I acquired, I slowly started to build my confidence, and it was through erasing my ignorance about the weight loss process – specifically about nutrition.”

Robert said that it took about 2 or 3 months before he noticed any significant changes in his appearance. He felt excited and overjoyed at his results, though, which motivated him to keep going. His kids played a huge role in his desire to become better as well, he says.

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A post shared by Robert Glover (@brixfitness)

His children motivated him to achieve his weight loss goals

“The idea of being a good example for my kids is what really kept me motivated. I wanted to lead by example. I want my kids to take care of their bodies and to live healthy lifestyles, and in order for them to do that, I had to practice what I preach. So this is the number one thing that kept me motivated throughout my entire journey.”

Even though he had the support and willpower to achieve his goals, however, he got frustrated at the slow process. It gets difficult sometimes to stick with a routine if you don’t see results right away. Through these setbacks, though, Robert learned the value and importance of consistency and patience.

“The biggest obstacle that stood between me and successful weight loss was my lack of patience,” he says. “I tried to do things to speed up the process, I would try to cut corners. I would try fad diets, I would overtrain and undereat because I thought that this is how you speed up the weight loss process.”

He learned the hard way, though, that he couldn’t cheat the system. Working out too hard or eating too little only depleted his energy and hurt his metabolism. So, he decided to focus more on the journey and not the destination, and let his hard work speak for itself. He learned a lot about nutrition and exercise along the way as well.

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A post shared by Robert Glover (@brixfitness)

Robert’s diet and exercise advice

“So, the key to success for nutrition for me was not having such a restrictive diet. I ate a lot of veggies. I had a high protein diet. But I still consumed carbs. I still had snacks every once in a while. It wasn’t so restrictive. When it was restrictive, that didn’t work out for me. When I learned how to have a little bit more balance, that’s when I was able to stick to it.”

Regarding exercise, Robert said he tried to incorporate things that brought him joy. He wanted his workouts to feel fun, not just like a chore. For him, he found out that he didn’t like high intensity workouts, so he mostly avoided those. He focused more on staying consistent and truly immersing himself in the exercises.

He says he aimed for 5-6 workouts per week, and didn’t set strict rules on the intensity level. For example, some days he just felt like going on a 20 minute walk, so he listened to his intuition. Other days, though, he felt like upping the intensity, so he did weight training or cardio for those workouts. Overall, Robert prioritized consistency above anything else, finding that this mindset helped him achieve his goals.

Robert offers some words of wisdom for anyone out there, wanting to get motivated to start a weight loss program.

“If you’re trying to lose weight and you want to start living a healthier lifestyle, my advice to you is this: prioritize consistency, focus on being consistent. Try your best to be patient. It takes time. And thirdly, develop good habits. Habits are the keys to a successful weight loss transformation. Habits are the keys to a successful life in general.”

Also, remember what motivated you to lose weight in the first place. At some point, you may start to lose focus and determination when the journey gets tough. During those times, you have to remember your “why,” whether it’s to improve your health, give your kids a better life, or something else.

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A post shared by Robert Glover (@brixfitness)

Above all else, though, make the journey about you and reaching your highest potential. By becoming your best self, you will inspire others to do the same as well.

Final thoughts: find what motivates you, and stay consistent

Robert’s incredible weight loss journey proves that you can achieve anything if you create good habits. No one likes working out or eating healthy at first, but if you stay consistent, it will become second nature. Also, remember to make your journey about self-love rather than just sheer discipline. You will have a hard time sticking with a workout routine that you don’t truly enjoy.

While you may grow impatient when you reach a plateau, keep in mind that you can’t build a fit body overnight. It takes time to achieve a goal, but all your hard work will pay off in the end.

Weekly tips, affirmations, and small actions to feel your best.

Every day is a day to shine. Shine on!