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5 Reasons Why It’s Okay To Be Single, According to Therapists

August 23, 2021 by Lakeisha Ethans

It’s okay to be single–really! It is!

Have you ever felt like there’s something wrong with you because you can’t seem to find the one? Do you feel pressured to always be in a romantic relationship? To get married, have kids, and settle down as soon as possible?

In this day and age, society tends not to understand single people. People learn since they are young that the goal should be to find a spouse. That’s an archaic belief. More and more people are beginning to be happily single. The norm is starting to crumble.

5 Reasons Why It’s Okay To Be Single

So, whether you are single by choice or haven’t found the right person, here are five reasons why it’s completely okay not to be engaged in a romantic relationship.

1. Singles Have More Time For Themselves

Being in a committed relationship takes time—a lot of it. Constantly having to slot in some couple time can be tiring and can stop you from building the life of your dreams.

Imagine trying to pursue a dream while in a relationship. While it’s not impossible, it sure requires a lot more sacrifice when you have someone else’s needs to consider. Say you want to travel, move to another city because of career opportunities, or otherwise follow your dreams. You can’t expect your partner to give up their dreams to follow you worldwide. Thus, all your dreams will have to either be kept on hold or pursued with half-measures.

Relationship expert Niloo Dardashti, Psy.D., explains that people committed to a relationship tend to stop doing things independently. People in couples usually lose touch with themselves because they have less time to focus on personal development.

She explains that being alone makes you more self-sufficient, more willing to “roll with the punches” and take on whatever life throws at them. When your life is wholly yours, you are more likely to take risks and pursue whatever dreams you have.

What the Experts Say

Psychologist Jenny Taitz sees singledom as a chance to figure out what you want from life. The extra time you have compared to people in relationships allows you to understand what you want and value.

While you might think that people in relationships can do all that to understand themselves and pursue their dreams, the reality is that whatever they do in life has to consider someone else’s needs. You cannot fully understand your values while being influenced by someone you spend all your time with. Your principles and needs will always be skewed to accommodate your partner while in a relationship.

So, being single is the best way to make time for yourself. You can be who you want to be, build your dream life free of constraints. Want to go to boozy brunch with friends? No one is stopping you. Want to take a year to travel the world? You don’t have to ask for permission. Be single and go live your best life!

2. Singles Develop Stronger Friendships And Ties With Family

People in relationships tend to focus so much on keeping the flame alive, keeping the relationship intact, that they run out of time to ensure their other interpersonal relationships don’t crumble. Surely, you’ve had that one friend who got into a serious relationship and vanished off the face of the Earth. And it’s not even their fault. It’s hard to juggle managing connections with your partner, your friends, and your family.

Studies show that the whole white picket fence married dream life of nuclear families living in the suburbs tend to have little to no connections to their neighbors than single people, who develop a large social network.

Bella DePaulo, Ph.D., is a social scientist specializing in the intricacies of single life who has extensively researched and documented truths and debunked misconceptions about single people. She has backed up the idea that coupled people tend to withdraw from social life and cut ties with family and friends on multiple occasions. Her research has shown that people who have always been single spend more time helping others, socializing, volunteering, and participating in civic activities. They are more likely to help their parents and be their caregivers as opposed to married people. She has also found that once people marry, they have less contact with friends and siblings.

A Study That Confirms It’s Okay to be Single

One study showed that couples were no happier and no more likely to have high self-esteem. The only noticeable difference was the time allotted to socializing and maintaining ties with friends and family.

So, instead of being sad about your single life, remind yourself that single people are the social glue holding everything together. You are the ones maintaining real connections with friends and family, those who will be there for the needy or sick, and those most involved in civic duties. Be happy about your relationships; remember, people in relationships have a lot to learn about networking from you.

3. Singles Tend To Be Healthier

Health and romantic involvement seem completely uncorrelated, but somehow, they aren’t. It all comes down to what you value most in life.

Coupled people tend to value time with their partners the most. Thus they tend to give up certain activities they once engaged in. It was found that exercise is one of the first things that gets neglected by people involved in a serious relationship. The reason why is quite simple: they either have no time to be healthy, or their priorities have changed. Maybe they don’t strive for that summer body anymore.

Whatever the truth is, couples have been shown to eat worse and work out less. Research supports this hypothesis, reporting that always-single men have reported eight hours of exercise over two weeks, unlike married men, who reported a little under five hours/two weeks. For always-single women, the rate was five and a half hours/two weeks compared to the four hours/two weeks reported by married women.

Studies also show that single women have reported their overall health as better. They had fewer disability days and fewer doctor visits.

Grab a workout buddy and go for a run. Take your time to meal prep. Singles can spend as much time as they want taking care of their health without having to feel guilty that they’re at the gym instead of with their partner.

4. Singles Don’t Settle

You’ve probably seen your friends go having to deal with abusive relationships, not being able to let go of toxic partners, always rushing to be with someone that they forget to think about whether that person is good for them or not.

Studies have shown that fear of being single can make someone long for their ex-partners. Du to something called repetition compulsion, the people who have been hurt in the past tend to rush into new relationships with the wrong people in a subconscious attempt to fix the pain.

Being in a relationship is pretty complicated. Luckily, single people don’t have these issues. If you’ve been single for a while, you aren’t afraid of being alone because you are content with yourself. Not only that, but you know that not being involved doesn’t mean you are alone. You still have tons of friends and a supportive family.

Without the issues that can make people used to being involved rush into new relationships with the completely wrong person, a single person can take a step back and analyze if someone is right for them or not. You don’t feel the psychological need always to have someone by your side. Therefore, you can be pickier and set high standards to make sure that, when the time comes, you will spot the red flags and you won’t jump into something toxic.

Here’s Great Reassurance Why It’s Okay to Be Single

Being single also allows you to discover who you are and what you want, thus making you more capable of understanding what you need from a partner further down the line.

Have fun, work on yourself, remember that you are single because you have clear standards and that a relationship, when unprepared, can be destructive. The more you learn to be happy with yourself, the better prepared for a relationship, and the more chances you’ll have to find Prince ( or Princess) Charming. You might even find that your knight in shining armor is none other than yourself.

5. Singles Are Often Better Workers

For some people, a career is just as important, if not more important, than the idea of having a life partner. Wanting to be single and focus on a job is not only legitimate but simply the best way of living for some people.

Single people don’t just work because they have to. They are the people who value meaningful work. They are the ones who work because they are passionate about what they do.

Studies have found that single people passionate about work were that way ever since high school. In 1991, high school seniors were asked what would be most important when looking for work. The ones who valued stability and work were most likely to be married when surveyed nine years later. In contrast, the ones who were motivated by intrinsic factors, like how meaningful the work is, were more likely to be single after nine years.

If you are single, the chances are that you are just too absorbed by your work to have time for a partner, and that is legitimate. Life is about finding meaning, and whether that meaning comes from your work, your passions, your family and friends, or your partner, that is your choice.

Focus on what you do and what you love that will bring you fulfillment. Forcing yourself into a relationship when your work is your real passion can only bring you harm. Get that promotion, start that business, do what you need to do, and don’t look back.

Final Thoughts On Why It’s Okay To Be Single

Being single is seen as a situation that needs to be fixed in this society. And if you were made to believe that being in a relationship is mandatory for a complete life, that is understandable.

Remember, being single is legitimate and can make you happy. Singles have more time to develop on a personal level, to pursue their dreams and careers. They have better bonds with friends and family. They are healthier, and, most importantly, they never settle.

So, embrace your single self and do whatever you want. When you are single, the world is your oyster.

This 2 Ingredient Colon Cleanse Flushes POUNDS of Waste FAST

August 22, 2021 by Power of Positivity

Do you feel bloated, even when you’re eating healthy? Have a weekend of over-indulging, and wish you could have a do-over? It might be time for a cleanse. You can do it right in the comfort of your own home. It’s so easy and inexpensive. You probably have the ingredients for this colon cleanse in your pantry right now.

A colon cleanse is an excellent way to flush toxins from your body and restore your digestive system. After, you will feel like you were given a fresh start.

This specific drinkable home remedy is easy, gentle, effective, and natural (unlike some, yikes). This is not a fast flush type of colon cleanse. It will simply purify the system as the ingredients work to help your body filter out toxins as waste. Then, it will help you retain the good bacterial balance of your digestive system.

Colon Cleanse Ingredients

This colon cleanses recipe is very simple. The two ingredients you will need are unpasteurized apple cider vinegar with the ‘mother’ floating at the bottom and some raw, unprocessed honey. Shake the bottle of apple cider vinegar to mix up the unfiltered part that settles at the bottom before measuring out the amount of vinegar to use.

Raw, unfiltered apple cider vinegar has recently gained a lot of interest from the medical research community and those looking for natural remedies for health problems. It is inexpensive and provides many health benefits for your colon and the rest of your body.

When you shop for apple cider vinegar, look for the raw variety. It’s the bottle that still has the murky stuff floating at the bottom. It’s the good stuff called the ‘mother’ and has many nutritional benefits that have not been filtered. These unfiltered particles will give you the most benefits to cleanse your colon fast.

The ‘mother’ of apple cider vinegar contains the bacteria acetobacter, which combines with oxygen to ferment the apple cider into vinegar. This is a helpful bacteria that breaks down food in our gut. Apple cider vinegar may also help reduce irregularity of the bowels and lower blood sugar levels after a meal and reduce blood pressure.

The Colon Cleanse Study That Supports This

Raw, unprocessed honey contains many excellent health benefits, and they work to help remove toxins and cleanse your colon fast. Honey, according to recent research in the Journal of Biomedicine and Biotechnology. Honey contains eugenol, a phenolic compound that has been shown to have anti-tumor properties. Playing with the concentrations of eugenol in the study, researchers could reduce the spread of colon cancer by almost 40%.

The active compounds in raw honey help kill cancer calls in your body, which is a great reason to use it in a safe colon cleanse. We also get probiotics from unfiltered honey. Probiotics help restore healthy bacteria to your digestive system. These bacteria help you digest your food and absorb nutrients. Honey helps increase these levels of good bacteria in your system.

Colon Cleanse Recipe:

To a glass with 8 ounces of warm water, add:

2 tablespoons of apple cider vinegar
2 tablespoons of raw honey

Stir this mixture well until the honey dissolves. You can drink this at the start of your day or anytime you feel like you need to cleanse your colon. Feel free to continue your normal daily activities without concern about when the cleanse will take effect. You do not need to be near a bathroom constantly with this type of colon cleanse.

Health Benefits:

Researchers in the Journal of Food Science say that vinegar is a serious health-beneficial food-enhancing substance with many healthy compounds. They say that the therapeutic effects of vinegar arise from consuming the many bioactive components that it contains, including acetic acid, gallic acid, catechin, epicatechin, chlorogenic acid, caffeic acid, p-coumaric acid, and ferulic acid.

The researchers say that vinegar’s many bioactive compounds have health benefits that include:

Antioxidant
Prevents diabetes
Antimicrobial
Prevents cancerous tumors
Helps obesity
Hypertension
Lowers cholesterol

Specifically, concerning colon cancer, the researchers cite a Japanese study that found that rice wine vinegar reduced colon cancer in rats and killed other types of cancer cells, including lung, breast, bladder, and prostate cancer cells.

As always, if you have any health problems or areas of concern, please consult with your primary care physician first before trying this colon cleanse. Good luck!

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

22 Things an Authentic Person Will Do Without Realizing It

August 22, 2021 by Chris Butler

It’s believed that fake people have an unrealistic perception of the world, while authentic people see things realistically. They know there’s good and evil, but they find contentment within themselves no matter what’s happening around them.

The fake folks tend to be like the bubble of soap that bursts when the sun shines. However, the genuine person can withstand sun, wind, rain, and even snow and remain unaltered. It comes down to being a deep thinker who generates their powers from within rather than looking to the outside.

22 Things an Authentic Person Does

Do you tend to be more of an authentic individual? Do you have a steady hand in life, or do you shake with every indifference that blows your way? Here are some classic signs of someone genuine you might be able to relate to.

1. They Are Free To Be Themselves

In a world of so many fake people, it’s nice to find an authentic person. This individual doesn’t have to be anything other than themselves; they’re happy living in their truth.

They’re honest, and you won’t catch them lying. If you don’t like what they have to say, then they don’t want to offend you, but they aren’t going to change because of it.

2. An Authentic Person Would Rather Hear About You Than to Talk About Themselves

One thing you will love about someone authentic is their great listener. They would rather hear what you say about your day than discuss their life. They’re far from a narcissist, who is self-absorbed and loves to ramble on about themselves.

3. They Make No Apologies to Anyone for the Way They Are

While they’re free to live their life, they don’t care if you don’t like how they conduct themselves. They make no apologies to anyone, though they’re not conceited or arrogant about their choices.

4. They Practice Self-Care To Remain Centered

Being authentic also means they must take care of themselves. They know that if they don’t take care of their needs that they can’t help others. According to Southern New Hampshire University, folks in this country work long hours and pass on vacation days, which can cause them to burn out.

However, authentic person knows they’re responsible for keeping their mental, physical, and spiritual health in check. While they like to make time for family and friends, they know that tending to their needs is non-negotiable.

5. They Add a Sparkle to Every Situation

The nice thing about authentic people is they usually have a good personality. They’re not loud or proud, but they tend to add a special sparkle to the room. They’re the kind of people you want to come to your party; they are charming and don’t cause drama.

6. They’re Not Held Back by the Opinions of Others

If you disagree with their opinions, it will not make them change their minds. They’re confident enough within themselves to believe what they want without interference. They like being a unique individual as it means they’re genuine.

7. They Don’t Follow the Crowd or Give in to Peer Pressure

Peer pressure to do or be a certain way doesn’t bother them at all. They have learned over the years that people will try to sway you in 100 directions, but they are strong enough to stand up for what they believe is suitable for their life.

8. They Choose a Career They Love

Being authentic means that they must be true to themselves too. So they won’t waste their time in a job that makes them miserable. They choose career paths that make them happy so that their days are not filled with misery and regrets.

Remember if you choose a job you love, you will never “work” a day.

9. An Authentic Person Exudes Self-Confidence

This person is not afraid to make bold moves, as they believe in themselves. They have an aura of self-confidence that tends to make them eager to try things others might be leery of attempting. They show that the sky is the limit when you believe in yourself.

10. They Don’t Wear Their Emotions on Their Sleeve

If you have constructive criticism, they can take your critique and apply it to their lives. They don’t tower in the face of rejection, either. They try to find the good in what’s being said and discard the rest.

11. They’re Not Afraid To Think Outside the Box

These people can be very creative when it comes to problem-solving. They don’t conform to society’s norms, so they have no problem thinking outside the box. This is probably why so many people come to them when they’re in a crisis.

12. They Strive To Be the Best Versions of Themselves

While they want people to like them, they focus more on being the best person possible. These people usually have smaller inner circles as they don’t see the need for many ingenuine folks.

13. An Authentic Person Will Always Try To Keep the Peace

Remember the old parable that starts with “Blessed are the peacemakers?” Well, authentic person likes to keep peace and contentment in their world. Now it’s not always possible, but they sure will try to live a life with little drama, as it just makes things better when there’s no a bunch of chaos.

14. They Live a Life That’s Present in the Moment

Being true to themselves means they’ve learned to live in the moment. They don’t waste their time worrying about things that haven’t or might not ever occur. They want to embrace each moment and make time for their loved ones.

15. They Can Listen to Your Opinion Without Being Offended

If you have an opinion you want to share with them, they will be glad to listen. However, even if you disagree with them on the big things like religion, politics, and other hot topics, they won’t look at you any differently. They know life is about diversity, and they embrace your differences.

16. They Tend To Look To the Inside More So Than Your Exterior

They certainly don’t judge a book by its cover, as they’re more interested in what’s on the inside. You might be a beauty queen or someone who is homeless, and this person will treat you the same. Their non-judgmental nature makes them a great person to have on your side.

17. They’re Flexible and Allow the Unpredictable

Just because someone is authentic doesn’t mean they haven’t been to the school of hard knocks a few times. They know that life requires you to be flexible because your entire world can change in the blink of an eye. The unpredictable nature of this world means that you must bend but never break.

18. They Have Realistic Perceptions of Reality

Rather than seeing the glass as half-full or half-empty, they see it for what it is. They don’t tend to be pessimistic or optimistic but take a realistic approach to living. They won’t feed you with some hopeful quotes if the situation is not good, as they’ll be up front and honest.

19. An Authentic Person Recognizes the Emptiness in Material Things

Material things are of little value to people who are thankful for what they have been given. They don’t need fancy cars and big houses to help them maintain their image.

In fact, they don’t care about the image at all. They want to be a good person and live good life, and anything else that comes their way is a blessing from the Universe.

20. They Look at the Bigger Picture Each Day

Rather than getting all caught up in the small, trivial things of the day, they tend to focus on the bigger picture. It’s easy to become frustrated by the annoyances that come from around, but they always keep their eye on the prize.

21. They Don’t Judge Others

There’s nothing worse than someone who judges everyone else. Thankfully, you won’t find that in an authentic person. They want to be loved and respected for who they are and will do the same for you. Judgmental people sometimes make negative moral assessments to increase their inner worth.

22. An Authentic Person Does Not Complain Often

You won’t hear them complain much about their life and the other happenings. They’ve learned to be content in most situations. That doesn’t mean they’re not human and won’t have down days, but they won’t stay down for too long.

Final Thoughts on the Actions of the Authentic Person

Being authentic is an excellent quality to have. In a world full of faux people who long for attention and material possessions, be someone who finds their strength from within and doesn’t need hype or glamor. Authentic people live the best life they know and won’t apologize to anyone.

A Team Player Does These 13 Things Without Even Realizing It

August 22, 2021 by Deborah Tayloe

Are you a team player, or do you tend to do your best work flying solo? In many instances in life, you’ll be required to work collectively with others rather than by yourself. Working as a team can be challenging for some folks, especially since you must put your needs and wants aside and consider the thoughts and feelings of others.

How often have you been a part of a team in school, work, or a social event where one party wasn’t pulling their fair share? The slacker is annoying to handle, especially when they take credit for everyone else’s hard work. Some folks let others carry and cover the load because they would rather use their time in other ways.

Sadly, the workforce is full of people who do very little. They are there for no other reason than to bring home a paycheck. They aren’t going to give any extra effort or go out of their way, as they do only what’s required of them.

Since each personality is different, it’s hard bringing all these different characters together to work as one unit. Some want to excel as a perfectionist, but others are happy to accomplish the status quo. Think of teamwork as an older home you’re remodeling.

Most older homes have rooms or individualized spaces that are very closed off from one another. However, most newer homes have an open concept. Teamwork is like redoing a house that’s a closed concept, and you’re opening it up to make it light and airy.

You change the atmosphere once you tear down the existing proverbial walls that cause a hindrance. Teamwork is very much like this, as you must tear down the walls between the workers so that you can get the job done.

Thirteen Things Team Players Do Naturally

Can you perform effectively with a group? Some will emerge as a leader, while some sit back and let other folks do the grunt work. Where do you see yourself falling in the mix of teamwork?

It’s challenging to work as a team. But this skill set is vital for your personal and professional life. How do team players do things differently, and how can they bridge the gap to work effectively?

1. Engage in Friendly Competition

A little competition can be healthy, especially if it helps you to get the job done faster. Someone good at team playing will know that competition can be very motivating, and it can help increase the team’s momentum.

According to Monnica T Williams, Ph.D. from Psychology Today, she writes that men and women can be equally competitive in their work. While competition can be unfriendly at times, it can be a great motivator when done right.

2. Embrace the Team Mentality

Remember the old saying that there’s no “I” in team? Well, you must realize that you cannot be about personal gain. When working on a team, everything you do is not for your glory, but the collective unit gets the praise.

Plus, in most instances, it’s not about recognition but more about doing a good job. Embracing the team mentality means you forgo personal accolades, and you must be willing to give credit to all who worked. If someone compliments this person on their efforts, they will quickly state that it wasn’t just them but the whole team who should be commended.

3. Commit Their All

Within a team, there’s a dynamic of who gives what. For instance, you will always have the slacker that may provide 10 percent, while you have the overachiever who takes control and offers 75 percent. Strive to give 100 percent, but never step over others to take the lead role.

Sure, a leader will naturally emerge in any team, but you need to give your all and work with others for the greater good regardless of your position.

4. Team Players Respect the Ideas of Others

You may have great ideas and opinions, but you must consider what others have to say. A team player always listens to the entire group and helps to find a good resolve without offending anyone. Two minds are better than one, and everyone has a say when you’re working with a team.

5. Be Willing To Do Whatever It Takes

Being a part of a team isn’t always easy, but you must be willing to do whatever it takes. There may be times that you have to give up your free time to get the job done, but going the extra mile is often required. A team player doesn’t mind going out of their way to ensure the task is accomplished.

6. A Team Player Will Be Transparent

Anyone working in a team knows that you must be 100 percent transparent with the other members. If you have any secret agendas or try to push for your personal gain, it can be a recipe for disaster. Always let others know what you’re doing so that there is never any confusion on your objectives.

7. Meet Important Deadlines

Someone who works well with a team knows that deadlines are essential and must be met. They know they might have to push themselves a bit to get it done, but they ensure that the team makes the goals set forth by the powers.

8. Stay Late or Go to Work Early

Sometimes, being in a team means working early or staying a bit later. The person who is all about teamwork will have no problem giving more to get a better return. Some folks thrive off the team spirit and have no issue doing whatever it takes to help them get ahead.

9. A Team Player Knows How to Remain Flexible

Things would always go like clockwork in a perfect world, but the world isn’t perfect. Additionally, someone who plays on a team must be flexible. Deadlines may change, and things can alter in the blink of an eye.

Someone who is all about the team will not fall to pieces when things don’t go their way. Rather, they’re going to stay in the game until they bring in the victory.

10. Keep Good Lines of Communication

You must communicate with one another to work in a team. Sure, it can be challenging when stress and tensions are at an all-time high. However, a good sport about teamwork knows that you must talk about your feelings, status on parts of the job, and other aspects to keep things going smoothly.

Think of a marriage. How well would your relationship be if you never communicated? The stronger your communication, the better your marriage. Keep this in mind when working with a group, as it can make or break the unit’s success.

11. Synchronize With the Rest of the Team

Have you ever watched synchronized swimmers perform? This hybrid form of dancing requires that everyone is working together. If one person does their own thing, the entire routine will be off.

When you’re working on a team, you must work together as a whole unit. If one person gets off the schedule, then it can make the entire group look bad. Someone who is all about the team knows the importance of synchronicity.

12. Honor the Individual Skills Within the Team

If someone can type 90 words per minute on the computer, they should do all the typing for the group. If another person is great at customer service, they should handle all the client interactions.

Within a team, you will find people with many skills, and each of these individual skills should be put to good use. Someone who’s all about being a team player knows that you put your best foot forward to get the job done.

13. Motivate One Another

Everyone has bad days; sometimes, you may not even feel like doing anything. However, the team players know that you must motivate one another. If you’re feeling down one day, then you can count on your team to lift your spirits.

The best part about being with a team has that camaraderie to help you when things get too stressful. According to Sterling, a highly engaged workforce can increase productivity by over seventeen percent. Workplace camaraderie only makes the team unit stronger.

Final Thoughts on Things Team Players Do

Do you see yourself as a team player, or do you tend to be someone who works best alone? If you were given a task as a team, would you emerge as the leader, or do you prefer to take a back seat?

Teamwork isn’t for everyone, and some downright hate working with a large group of other people. However, there are times in life when you have no choice but to work with others. Whether the task is for monetary gain, to help someone in need, or to organize a family gathering, it’s always best to do your best job.

5 Things That Prove That Life’s Best When You Can Be Yourself

August 22, 2021 by Deborah Tayloe

Have you ever tried to be something you’re not to impress someone? How did that turn out for you? When the person finds out that you’re not being honest, they won’t stay around long.

Molly met a handsome boy, Jake, who is from an affluent family. Molly’s family doesn’t have money, so she is afraid that he won’t like her. So, she lies about her job and family’s wealth to get a date with him.

Things are sizzling between the two of them almost from the start. However, there’s a black cloud of deception hovering over them that could ruin their relationship. Jake finds out the truth, and Molly has some explaining to do.

Sure, he might have given her a chance if he got to know the genuine person on the inside, but since she decides to lie and not be herself, she created a toxic situation that led to their demise.

Molly lacked self-esteem and confidence in who she was as a person, and it cost her the one thing she wanted more than anything. The key here is that you need to stop being so hard on yourself and beating yourself up over things you can’t control. If you can’t love and accept yourself, how can you expect others to do the same?

Had Molly only been honest, the story might have an entirely different ending. The lesson is that you can’t get anywhere in life by being something you’re not. You must be yourself, and if people don’t like you, then it’s on them.

Five Benefits You Reap When You Can Be Yourself

It’s imperative that you’re honest with yourself and those around you. If you can’t be who you’re, you will drive yourself crazy trying to fit into molds that aren’t made for you. Here are five ways you can live your best life when you be yourself.

1. You Have Your Own Identity

Science proves that there’s only one of you in this entire world. Looking at your DNA demonstrates that no two human beings are alike, even if you’re an identical twin. Science Daily posts this unique research that proves that you’re uniquely you, and there will never be anyone like you.

Looking beyond DNA and science, you can see that your individuality is remarkable. The things that make you different are how you do your hair, smile, talk, and dress. The world is full of people who live behind a façade, but when you can live in the truth and be yourself, it gives you freedom that feels amazing.

Have you ever met a person that tends to “march to the beat of their own drum?” They dare to be different, and they don’t care what anyone has to say about it. These are the people who are truly happy inside, as they don’t try to fit into the box of normality.

2. Be Yourself–You Will Gain Courage

Have you ever tried creating a whirlpool effect in a swimming pool? What happens when you try to turn and go against the current? It’s nearly impossible to do.

The same things happen in life. When you dare to go against the grain, you face fierce opposition. However, do you realize the courage that it takes to be different?

Remember back to the high school days when peer pressure was so great as kids sprouted their wings? If you told the “in-crowd” that you didn’t want to do certain things, they might have called you names and pegged you as an outcast. However, you were the winner, as you didn’t need to fit into their clicks to be happy.

If you don’t stand for something in this life, then you will fall for anything. When you be yourself and don’t apologize to anyone for it, you will gain courage you never knew you had inside.

3. You Have Defined Boundaries

Boundaries are a topic that few people like to talk about. Setting limits is healthy both for you and those around you. The key is that you don’t cross these limitations for the sake of your sanity.

A healthy boundary for a newly dating couple would be no intimacy for one month of dating. Even if the other party tries to break that rule, you’ve decided that you want things to be at a higher level before you involve romance. The people you date, who truly care about you, will respect those boundaries, as they’re important.

Maybe you were the kid in school that wouldn’t tell a lie no matter what the situation. The kids around you would soon recognize your limits and know better than asking you to lie for them. When you can freely be yourself, you can set boundaries that allow you to be authentic with yourself and the world around you.

4. You’re Focused and Have Direction

People who are preoccupied with being something they’re not, can genuinely have a miserable life. It’s often observed during the teen years when kids experiment with expression. They may express themselves through wild hairstyles, unique clothing, and headbanging music.

However, as you age, you tend to find what works for you. Only, the problem is that some people never find their niche and where they fit. When you can be yourself without any preoccupation with what you should be, you can remain focus and heading forward.

It’s exhausting to be something you’re not, or to attempt to fit into a box that wasn’t made for you. It’s as productive as chasing rainbows, and the result is one unhappy person. Be true to yourself, and your focus and direction will be enhanced.

5. You Live With Purpose

Some believe that each person is here on earth with a purpose to fulfill. Maybe, you’re supposed to help the elderly in hospice as they pass from this world to the next. Perhaps you’ve been called to work in a hospital with sick people who need kindness and care.

What is your purpose, and what makes you feel fulfilled as a human being? If you get distracted by silly things, you may not satisfy your destiny. Sure, there may be thousands of nurses in the city you live in, but you can make an impact just by being you.

Here is an illustration

Take, for instance, the cab driver in New York City who dared to be different. As reported on Daily Ten Minutes, Wally, the taxi driver, wasn’t like the other cabbies in the city. Harvey was in town visiting and needed to hitch a ride to the airport.

There are hundreds if not thousands of cab drivers in the city, but there was something different about Wally’s cab. When it pulled up to the corner, it was abnormally clean. Even the tires on this vehicle were sparkling. Wally got out of the cab to help Harvey with his luggage, and his presentation was just as clean as the vehicle.

He dressed as if he were driving a limo. Once inside, Harvey couldn’t help but notice the sign that talked about customer service. He was offered a soft drink or water since Wally kept a cooler upfront to refresh his guests.

He also has a thermos with coffee in it should his clients need a little caffeine boost, though he also had decaf. As the ride continued, Harvey was offered a newspaper, the choice of radio stations, and even the temperature that suited him best. Intrigued by this unique riding experience, Harvey asked Wally if he had always been this way.

To his surprise, Wally wasn’t always the best taxi in town, but he decided that’s what he wanted to be for his customers. He told Harvey that he spent the first five years of his career complaining and griping about his job just like all the other drivers, but he decided to change. He wanted to be the best driver around, giving his customers a great experience.

Fast forward two years, his cab is always full, and he is the most recognized cabbie in the area. The first year with his changed attitude did well for him, as he doubled his regular income. The following year his income quadrupled. He works for a large company, but people call to request him specifically.

See, it doesn’t matter what you do in life or where you go; when you be yourself, the sky is the limit.

Final Thoughts on Why It’s Pretty Great to Be Yourself

When you think beyond the here and now and stop trying to fit into molds created by society, you can accomplish amazing things. Look at Wally, the cab driver from NYC. He didn’t have a high school education and never went to college, but what he did was magnificent for his customers. His vision and drive to be different and stop fitting into the molds made him a legend.

When you dare to be yourself, the world is your oyster. Amazing things can and will happen when you stop trying to be something you’re not. This world needs people like you that are willing to bust out of the shell and think outside the box. Remember, ducks quack and eagles soar, and which one you want to be is up to you.

9 Ways To Speak Your Mind Without Hurting Feelings

August 21, 2021 by Lakeisha Ethans

People often hear that they should stand up for themselves, that if they know something important, they should go ahead and say it. That’s not always so easy, especially if you mustn’t offend anyone. Speaking your mind and not getting backlash can feel mutually exclusive at times. It’s just another stage in learning how to coexist with seven billion people. Here are nine ways to speak your mind without offending anyone.

1. Don’t Make Assumptions

Jumping to conclusions makes you seem careless and has led to many a debacle. Looking before you leap applies to constructive dialogue, so don’t go making assumptions. It’s disrespectful and caters to an inflated sense of self.

· Let Go Of Stereotypes

Even if you don’t believe certain stereotypes, referencing them has the potential to offend. People don’t want to be reminded of the unkind or unfair assumptions that come from stereotyping. If an observation you make is couched in stereotype, people will take you less seriously.

· Hold Your Tongue

Good conversations require patience. Sometimes it’s best to keep listening before you run your mouth. Get the whole story, think about it, and then give your opinion. It’s all too easy to make unhelpful assumptions about a person or what they’ve been through.

· Learn About People Before Deciding You Know Them

People hate when you assume what their opinions are instead of confirming with them. If you’re about to make a logical leap, stop yourself and ask for more information. What they say could completely change your perspective and save you from making a fool of yourself.

2. Be Open To An Earnest Discussion

Have a good back-and-forth by being open-ended instead of confrontational. It’s a lot harder for people to get offended when you accept and encourage disagreement. No one has to be on any particular side when many opinions are exchanged in good faith.

· Make Your Biases Clear

You’ll appear relatable if you clarify who you are from the start. Whether you’re skeptical of veganism or an activist for gun control, say what you’re for and against. Getting everyone on the same page lowers the chance of misunderstandings.

· Be Firm But Fair

You can have strong opinions while also saying you could be wrong. Author Liane Davey, Ph.D. teaches to validate others by reflecting on what they’ve said, showing their perspective is clear. Argue in favor of your opinions, but not in a way that makes personal slights.

· Take Criticism Well

Getting things wrong in a discussion can be a positive experience. Learning something new is good and fosters common ground with those you’re talking to. The conversation doesn’t have to be a competition, and people will take what you say more seriously if you’re graceful about your errors.

3. Be Empathetic

Accommodate people’s emotions to foster positive thinking and prevent offense. When someone is trying to get their point across, please give them the benefit of the doubt. Develop a good rapport so that what everyone says receives a fair hearing.

· Reassure People

Make it clear that the emotions of others are essential to you. Include phrases like “how would you feel if,” “I’m not singling you out,” and “I know it could be uncomfortable.” They may return the favor and react less harshly to controversial things you say.

· Think Altruistically

Staying positive fuels altruism, letting you explore how the conversation can help everyone. Speak your mind, but request input and expertise. Pick up on details without interrupting, and then offer your opinion, so people know you’re attentive and they’ve contributed.

· Rudeness Is Risky

Disagreements shouldn’t lead to rude comments. Some research shows that rude behavior makes people more likely to perceive rudeness in later interactions, convincing them to be mean in retaliation, spreading negativity like a virus. If you pointedly respond to someone, be careful that you don’t sound angry and defensive.

4. Don’t Make Sweeping Statements

Rushing to prove themselves right, people like to make ignorant generalizations about the world. It can put others on the defensive, feeling slighted and condescended to. This is a recipe for disaster and something you can stumble into even if you’re typically more level-headed.

· Antagonistic Framing

Generalizations frame things divisively and easily create tension. This includes offensive accusations that everyone disagreeing with you is wrong. You might claim nothing a politician did was good, or no actor in a movie performed well. This is toxic, as research shows that being offended hurts a person’s sense of reputation, challenging their feelings of personal value.

· Over The Top Claims

It isn’t very reassuring to make bold, barely-provable claims, especially with some call to action. This can include trying to scare people into adopting your perspective or making people feel guilty for disagreeing. It’s best to back what you say with evidence and don’t jump to convert people to your thinking. Just say what you heard about and let others weigh in.

5. Respect People’s Privacy

Privacy is tricky since it’s hard to gauge how much people are willing to share about themselves. In general, stick to the side of caution. If you touch a nerve, quickly apologize and get out of dodge.

· Choose Your Topics Wisely

Don’t ask a question you know you wouldn’t want to answer, and don’t abruptly broach sensitive topics. If you have something important to say about someone’s job or love life, assess what you know and proceed respectfully. Memorize what to say ahead of time to keep the situation palatable.

· Dance Around The Issue

Before you offer your head on a silver platter, say and ask things to guess what could offend. Scrutinize reactions to see if you can speak your mind more directly. Someone repeatedly changing the subject when you try to steer the conversation is a dead giveaway that you should drop it.

· Be Wary Of Warnings

With a shrewd eye, you can tell if someone is starting to get offended. When you get closer to the subject you want, a person’s tone of voice can warn you not to go further. If someone outright says they won’t talk about a particular subject, you’re in a tough spot. One option is to apologize beforehand and then say your opinion.

6. Don’t Corner People

Being excessively argumentative is a good way to offend people. Don’t make things all about you, engaging in long-winded spiels that end with saying people should agree with you. Use positive thinking to maintain your emotional intelligence and speak amicably.

· Polarized Thinking

When you’re sure about something, it’s tempting to corner people into agreeing with you. But think for a second about how that would make you feel. You wouldn’t want someone giving you ultimatums, saying you’re immoral if you disagree. That sort of polarized thinking tends not to be convincing and makes people argue.

· Mutual Understanding

People will be offended by you trying to dominate them. You may be reciting what you think is a perfectly crafted, non-aggressive argument that will proselytize your listeners. But research shows that there can be a marked dissonance between your intentions and the reaction of the offended person. This relies heavily on context, and if you’re condescending to someone without giving them a chance to respond, you’re looking for trouble.

· Ranting Keeps You Agitated

Once you get started, it’s hard to stop. Ranting keeps you in a frenzy where you say anything to convince people you’re right. People can feel uncomfortable disagreeing because of how they think you’ll react. There’s nothing wrong with being passionate, but you should clarify that with everyone and respectfully ask them to hear you out.

7. Be Vulnerable

When speaking your mind, it helps to make it clear that you’re just a vulnerable human like anyone else. Be cheerful and generous, unafraid to make mistakes. Coming across negatively will bias people against your opinions, so cultivate an atmosphere of understanding.

· Maintain The High Ground

If someone sounds rude, don’t take the bait and get heated. You could even say something nice to the person so that they’re forced to give you a chance when you speak your mind. Pace yourself and don’t say everything on your mind all at once, which could hamper people’s sympathy.

· Prioritize Friendliness

Be self-deprecating and make jokes to lighten the mood. Keep your reactions measured and balance your opinions with concern for others. Life coach Carolyn Hidalgo, CPCC, recommends communicating non-judgementally by stating your personal feelings first and asking people for theirs.

8. Use Concrete Language

Say what you mean clearly and completely. Speaking vaguely can make listeners read between the lines and develop false impressions. They’ll put words in your mouth if you’re not careful. Speak groundedly by knowing what point you’re actually trying to get across.

· Begin With The End In Mind

When speaking off the cuff, you can end up rambling, leading to a lost train of thought and you plugging in any regrettable statement. While others are engaged, think for a moment to define your position. Be specific and prepare details that’ll make you convincing.

· Ambiguous Phrasing

The nuance of language is hard to navigate, so be positive that people understand what you’re saying. Ambiguous phrasing is open to interpretation and may get you in trouble. For example, the statements “unneeded inventory assessment,” “he’s been riding me pretty hard,” and “I’ve never tasted it cooked that way” have contextual meanings.

· Weasel Words

Weasel words are unnecessary qualifiers that keep you from commitment. They make you sound disingenuous, like someone speaking from a place of unearned authority. Be specific instead of saying things like “lots of people agree,” “nowadays we know,” or “political analysts will tell you that.”

9. Read The Room

Sometimes you need to read a room and consider what everyone has been through lately. If it’s someone’s birthday or an important holiday you’ll want to speak your mind with care. Unfortunately, a lot of this can boil down to guessing about what is and isn’t said.

· Arrange Things

It can be better to finish up a conversation with more sensitive topics. If you try to get too personal too quickly, people may clam up, especially if it’s supposed to be a happy occasion. Let everyone have their fun first and then get to the nitty-gritty.

· Signs And Portents

Be careful that speaking your mind doesn’t get you snapped at. If someone answers you with one-word replies and doesn’t make any comments, they could be in a bad mood. To know if someone is closed off, watch for crossed arms, crossed ankles, and staring off into space.

· Rewording

It doesn’t matter how badly you want to say something. You have to figure out the right way to way it. You can offend someone having a bad day even if what you’re saying isn’t bad. For example, don’t be forceful with phrases like “people in your line of work,” “have to use,” and “if you don’t.” Psychologist Jennice Vilhauer, Ph.D., says that it can be helpful to express what you do want before what you don’t, so people can start thinking of solutions instead of bearing the brunt of your negativity.

Final Thoughts On Some Ways To Speak Your Mind Without Hurting Someone’s Feelings

If you think human relationships are fraught and tiringly difficult, you’re right. Just hold on to your positive thinking and give people a chance. You may want to speak your mind, but so does everyone else. Please do your part to guarantee that there’s a little more patience in a world badly needing it.

Meet the Queen of the Cyr Wheel (MUST SEE!)

August 21, 2021 by Kristen Lawrence

If you’ve ever been to a circus, you’ve probably seen a Cyr Wheel performer. The Cyr Wheel is an acrobatic apparatus consisting of a large ring made of aluminum or steel. The wheel is about 10-15 cm taller than the performer. It first appeared in performances at the end of the 20th century but wasn’t officially named until 1998.

The Cyr Wheel, or roue Cyr in French, takes the name from its founder, Daniel Cyr. The Canadian circus performer first unveiled his invention in 2003 at the Festival Mondial du Cirque de Demain (“Circus of Tomorrow World Festival”) in Paris. Cyr ended up winning a silver medal for his dazzling routine using the homemade Cyr Wheel.

Cyr created his first wheel from a rough piece of steel. Later on, he began using aluminum to make the wheel lighter, adding PVC coating for smoothness. Finally, he created a more portable five-piece design that one could disassemble and put back together using screws.

Today, thousands of acrobats and circus performers use the wheel for their routines. From the giant stages of Las Vegas to the streets of London, spectators can’t get enough of the Cyr Wheel performances. They make it look easy, but it takes great skill and precision to master this sport.

While the idea of the Cyr wheel didn’t take off until recently. However, it’s been around nearly a century. Historians believe that American dancer Doris Humphrey was the first modern performer to incorporate a monowheel into her act. Photographs taken at one of her shows in 1923 capture her performing with an apparatus very similar to the Cyr wheel.

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German manufactured mass-produced the closest forerunner of the Cyr Wheel, the Einreifen, in the early 1950s. Cyr first experimented with wheel designs in the 1990s. He claimed he inspiration from a large hula-hoop and a round wrought-iron coat rack.

How does the Cyr Wheel work?

If you’ve never seen a Cyr Wheel performance, it usually begins with the performer rolling the heavy wheel on its edge. Once the wheel starts to wobble, the acrobat steps in and out of it in a well-timed, mesmerizing dance. Then, the performer steps onto the wheel, gripping it with both feet and hands.

As the wheel continues to gain momentum, the user performs spins, inversions, somersaults, and pirouettes while keeping the wheel and himself in perfect balance. Of course, it takes hundreds or thousands of hours of practice to gain control of the wheel and feel comfortable with complex moves. However, if you’d like to give the Cyr Wheel a try, you can start with these basic movements:

Skate start:

Keep one foot on the wheel. Then use the other foot to push off like you’re on a skateboard. Then, put your “pushing foot” back on the wheel and keep spinning.

Wheel-to-toe start:

Use your arms to start spinning the wheel Then step onto it once it starts to rotate.

Roll-by start:

With your arms in the 9 and 12 o’clock positions, start spinning the wheel. Next, twist your torso to keep the wheel at your side, then spin it in front of you, stepping onto the wheel in one graceful movement.

You can also find many free sources such as YouTube channels for tutorials and tips.

Meet the Queen of the Cyr Wheel

One woman had humble beginnings with the Cyr Wheel and now performs all over the world. Meet Tosca, the undeniable queen of the Cyr Wheel.

“When I started out, Cyr Wheel was just something I practiced on my own in the gym at night, and I never really thought it would bring about so much change in my life,” Tosca said. “I travel a lot, I get to work with my friends, I never expected that coming out of merely what I thought was a sport and a way to stay fit at the beginning.”

She grew up playing soccer and doing gymnastics, which has given her a solid foundation for the Cyr Wheel. Since performing with the apparatus requires both grace and stamina, her background gives her an advantage. While it’s physically demanding, it’s also an art form that allows performers to showcase their creative side.

“I am originally from Prague, I moved to LA 10 years ago and have performed for a long time. I still do, but now I also produce full concept shows, which has been nice,” Tosca said. “Since I segued from doing Cyr Wheel as merely a sport into combining it with more of a performative Burlesque element, I’ve always been inspired by Dita Von Teese, the undisputed queen of Burlesque. It has been incredible getting to work with her, and I hope that the tour we were supposed to do this year is able to happen next year in Europe.”

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Tosca says she works long hours but greatly enjoys all the challenges along the way. She finds happiness in her career as a Cyr Wheel performer. Besides, she feels motivated to continue creating exciting shows for her audiences. Whether she’s training, putting together a show, or talking to friends about her ideas, Tosca always finds something to keep her busy.

It’s amazing to watch a Cyr Wheel performer using only their bodies and an aluminum wheel to create mind-blowing visual art. Tosca’s come a long way in the sport, and we’re excited to see where it takes her next!

Final thoughts on the Cyr Wheel performers that entertain audiences around the world

Are you interested in trying out the Cyr Wheel or seeing a live show? It’s certainly a fascinating sport. Humans never cease to inspire, especially when it comes to acrobatics or performances that test the limits of the mind and body. It requires monumental control and precision to master the Cyr Wheel, along with years of practice.

Tosca deserves every bit of success she enjoys today. Hopefully, you get to see her perform live someday!

Have you ever seen a Cyr Wheel performance in person or tried it out yourself? Let us know in the comments!

4 Positive Ways to Live in Harmony with Aging Parents

August 21, 2021 by Lakeisha Ethans

Are you planning to start living with aging parents? Whether this is for the sake of practicality, caregiving, a mix of both, or something else entirely, this can be quite a difficult transitional period! Your parents may be struggling with numerous aging issues, which can make interactions with them more challenging.

Harder still, your whole parent-child dynamic is changing! Gone are the days when, as a child, you depended on them for guidance and life’s necessities, and gone are the days when everything they said was a hard and fast rule to follow. This is a considerable shift in what is “normal” from what you and your parents are used to, which can be very stressful to navigate.

So, how can you handle these changes and navigate the shifting structure of your bond with your parents? Here are four positive ways to live with aging parents in harmony.

1. Communicate Well

Communication is central to any harmonious relationship, but positive communication can be tough when you live with aging parents. There may be cognitive impairments that make conversations harder. There could be stubbornness and fear that leads to unproductive discussions. Perhaps there may even be frustrations and old emotional wounds that further cloud the table.

Remember that your parents are more than just parents – they’re human beings with feelings, thoughts, and opinions, and they want those things to be validated. They’re trying to deal with the change of moving in together, just like you; for that reason, positive communication is necessary as personalities collide and spaces change. Here are some tips for healthy communication with your aging parents:

· Practice Empathy, Always

Empathy is the key to living with aging parents in harmony. With a shifting dynamic, the frustration of aging, and additional responsibilities, there will be many things that require your patience, understanding, and compassion. There will be moments when you are frustrated, and that’s when you must bring kindness and empathy to the forefront of your mind. Put yourself in the shoes of your parents and seek to understand their point of view.

· Be Patient and Persistent

When you bring something up, it’s okay if it doesn’t get resolved right away. Many complex topics may require breaking up into more digestible pieces for your parents, particularly if these topics may dredge up fear in them. Don’t expect everything to be fixed the first time you bring it up. Persistently revisit the topic with patience, and your conversations will become productive.

· Ask Them Questions

It’s easy to talk at instead of with your parents as they age, as they may not be engaged in communication when you initiate. Please encourage them to participate by asking questions that give them a chance to think and reflect. Use open-ended questions when broaching complex topics and seek to listen to and understand their answers truly.

· Use “I” Statements

When you need to bring up a sensitive or difficult topic, avoid the brewing of conflict by using “I” statements. These statements focus on your concerns instead of coming off as accusatory, which can avoid arguments. For example, instead of saying, “You’re not eating enough. You should eat more!”, say, “I’m concerned because you haven’t been eating all your meals, and I’m worried that you might not be eating enough.” Your parents are likely the ones used to being in control and having the final say, so presenting feedback or difficult topics in this way allows them to adjust to the shift in dynamic with positive thinking.

2. Draw Lines and Boundaries

Depending on how you were raised, there’s a chance that you didn’t have that many boundaries with your parents while you were growing up. Regardless of how that helped or harmed you back then, the fact is that now, a lack of boundaries is sure to harm your household.

Studies show that clear boundaries are crucial to cohabiting a space with the family. After all, they’re healthy and important for all relationships, and your relationship with your parents is no different. Here are some ways to draw lines and boundaries so you can live with your aging parents in harmony:

· Set Expectations Quickly

From the beginning, you should set some expectations with your parents about how your home will be run with your parents. This is especially true if you are also living with other family members aside from your parents. What areas are private personal spaces? Which areas are shared? Who is in charge of what responsibilities, from a household, financial, and caregiving perspective? Setting expectations is challenging, but it’s crucial for everyone’s sanity!

· Don’t Fall Into Old Patterns

There are a lot of parent-child patterns that may linger from your younger years. Please don’t fall into the trap of repeating them. Your parents don’t need to know every single detail of your life. They don’t get a say in your every waking moment, and they definitely don’t get to veto your personal decisions about your own life. At the same time, you shouldn’t rely on them for opinions, instruction, and validation, and you don’t need to ask them for permission to do things. Everyone here is an adult and deserves to be treated as such, so don’t slip into patterns that infantilize you.

· Keep Living Your Life

You have new responsibilities now that you live with your parents. But you also have your old ones. You should continue to maintain the lifestyle that you always have, including your routines, social relationships, work, diet, and commitments. You had a life before they moved in with you and should continue to have that life, even if some adjustments need to be made. This familiar routine also ensures that you’ll maintain health and positive thinking to make you a better caregiver.

· Don’t Expect Them To Change

While the saying “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks” is a bit of an exaggeration, it’s worth noting that many parents are stubborn and can be stuck in their ways. If, ultimately, your parents decide that they don’t want to change a habit or behavior that may not be the best for them, if it’s their personal decision, you’ll have to respect it. Apply context and nuance here to make the right decision and practice simple acceptance where necessary.

3. Ask For Outside Support When Needed

Don’t try to be a hero when it comes to taking care of and living with aging parents! There’s no shame in needing help when the going gets tough. External support can be your lifeline, especially on particularly rough days. Here are some forms of outside support you can avail of:

· Talk To Friends

Your friends (and relationship partner, if applicable) can provide support and outside opinions, whether you need a shoulder to cry on, an ear to vent to, or some advice from a third party. Sharing your thoughts and feelings with someone from outside of the family can be instrumental in helping you through this transitional phase of your life.

· Bring In Other Family Members

If you have siblings or other individuals linked to your parents somehow, you can bring them in for assistance when necessary. It’s a good idea to set expectations, boundaries, and agreements beforehand, so all family members feel satisfied with the outcome. Just make sure that you and the person you bring in are on the same page and that you can trust them completely with your parents’ care!

· Seek Counseling or Therapy

The changing dynamic involved with living with aging parents can be stressful and emotional. Sometimes, you need some extra help from mental health professionals to process and regulate those new feelings. The help that you get from therapy or counseling can keep you going and prevent resentment from brewing in your home.

· Get Professional Caregiving Help

If your parents require care that you cannot devote yourself to due to your work or other commitments, don’t try to add that care to your plate anyway. Talk to your parents about the need to hire additional help of a professional kind. Explain the benefits that they’ll be able to receive from a trained caregiver. It’s essential to use our aforementioned communication tips in talking about this to your parents, as you’ll want them to be on board with receiving professional aid. That prospect can be frightening to them. So make sure to maintain a good rapport with the professionals you hire and listen to your parents if they have complaints or request a change in care!

4. Don’t Lose Sight Of Fun

Living with aging parents isn’t all serious. It can be fun, too. With all the changes that you have to navigate, you and your parents deserve a chance to enjoy yourselves. Your parents are still your parents, no matter how old they get. So the familial love that you share is something that you’ll continue to have, even in this new chapter of all of your lives.

People sometimes make the mistake of forgetting to enjoy their time spent with their parents, especially in new cohabitation arrangements. You can make the best of these moments and be appreciative of the time you get to spend with your family members in the twilight of their lives! Every moment spent with family is one to be grateful for, after all.

So spend time with your parents, watch movies and shows together, enjoy good meals with each other, and find activities that you can all participate in at once. Seek to capitalize on things you have in common, respect each other’s autonomy, and try to make each day fun and happy for all involved!

Final Thoughts On Some Positive Ways To Live With Aging Parents

It can be challenging to start living with aging parents. Finding a way to strengthen, maintain, and cement better, healthier bonds with them may be complicated. But like all parts of life, it’s just a chapter that needs to be adapted to, and the concept is no different from any other challenge you’ve faced.

As time passes, you’ll learn how to navigate this new phase of all of your lives. With communication, boundaries, external support, and the continual creation of fun bonding time, you and your parents will be able to live together in harmony.

4 Effective Habits To Cultivate Acceptance

August 20, 2021 by Lakeisha Ethans

For such a simple concept, acceptance can be hard to build. It’s a trait that allows adaptability and implies that you can allow situations, experiences, people, and yourself to be as you are. It can create positive thinking and help you progress in life when you cultivate acceptance.

But acceptance is a daunting trait to try and develop. So many times, it’s hard to accept things that are painful and difficult. So how can you build this skill? Here are four effective habits to cultivate acceptance.

1. Separate Yourself From Your Thoughts and Feelings

Cognitive defusion refers to a skill where you can let go of and separate yourself from your emotions and thoughts. Contrary to the way it sounds, this is not a tactic for avoidance or denial, and it’s a significant part of cultivating acceptance. This method of distancing works in the following ways:

· It Lets You Notice Emotions Without Being Controlled By Them

You need to pay attention to your feelings to accept them, and it’s not healthy to repress or deny your genuine emotions. But focusing on how you feel can also cause you to become stuck in them, leading to the risk of being controlled by those complex emotions. That’s why separating yourself from your feelings is so valuable – it lets you watch them and pay attention to them in a logical way without being innately affected by them. Research finds that this separation allows you to change the status of your emotions while observing them as they come and go instead of focusing on their strength or how long they last.

· It Decreases Believability

It seems counterproductive to decrease believability in the experiences that you have. Still, studies show that this is a crucial part of cultivating acceptance, primarily through emotional regulation. When you decrease that believability, you also lessen the degree of attachment and reliance on your feelings, thoughts, and past experiences as a self-defining feature. The less attached you are to those things, the more likely you are to be able to accept them instead of dwell on them.

· It Lets You Witness Them From The Outside

Have you ever noticed that people who are too close to a subject have trouble seeing what’s obvious to everyone a little further away? As an outside witness to your own emotions, you’ll be able to observe yourself without being too close to the subject, so you can see it as a third party would. This kind of perspective-shifting is crucial for positive thinking and self-compassionate acceptance, as it helps to contextualize what you experience with realism, say studies.

So the next time you find yourself struggling with emotions and feelings related to an inability to accept reality and truth, take a step back. View your feelings and thoughts as separate from you, and you’ll be able to analyze better and understand them, which will push you towards acceptance.

2. Understand What Acceptance Is Not

A lot of people refuse to cultivate acceptance because they have false ideas of what acceptance truly is. You may even have negative beliefs about what acceptance entails, causing you to want to avoid it altogether. But the truth about acceptance may surprise you! Here’s what acceptance is not:

· Avoiding Improvement

Some people may conflate the concept of acceptance with apathy, believing that it’s an inherently uncaring behavior that relinquishes agency and may even be akin to giving up on growth and development altogether. But that’s not the case! Acceptance is vital to improvement. It allows you to understand yourself better. So acknowledge the positive and negative sides of reality, and accept that there are things that you need to work on. It’s the furthest from avoiding improvement – it’s instrumental to the process!

· Supporting Or Wanting What You Accept

Acceptance doesn’t mean necessarily liking what you’re accepting, nor does it suggest that you support or want it. Instead, it’s about avoiding the unnecessary suffering caused by rejecting a reality just because you dislike it or don’t want it. It would be best to accept when the fact is outside your control to shift your focus onto things you can control or do to handle the situation better. Acceptance allows you to exist as is without shame, which in turn will enable you to shed excess pain and focus energy on forwarding momentum.

· Being Passive

Some people think of acceptance as something passive that means letting things happen without caring about the world. In fact, acceptance is a very active skill, and it’s also a perishable one. It takes constant work and effort to commit to consciously accepting the present state of yourself and your life, and the less you practice the skill, the less likely you are to be able to perform it time and time again. Acceptance is always overriding the natural urges you feel to try and control the uncontrollable, and it’s constantly aware of the truth so you can make more informed decisions. It’s the furthest thing from being passive!

When you overcome false ideas of acceptance and start focusing on the truth of the skill, you’ll find cultivating it is a more appealing idea.

3. Build Better Awareness Of Self When You Want To Cultivate Acceptance

As previously mentioned, acceptance is an active skill, not a passive one. It requires vigilance and awareness of the self, especially of your inner thoughts and emotions, and a realistic grasp of the world around you. Only with this awareness can you know what it is that you need to accept. Here are some tips for building that awareness:

· Be Completely Honest With Yourself

It’s hard to confront uncomfortable facts or realities about yourself and your thoughts. There may be things you’re ashamed of about yourself that you push away, so you don’t have to think about them. Unfortunately, those things are the very things you need to accept. It’s time to get radically honest about the roots of your issues and the core of your values. Spend time journaling, reflecting, examining your thoughts, and talking to yourself like a friend. These steps will help you become more aware of yourself, even when those aspects aren’t things you’re the proudest of. Once you’re aware of them, you can accept them, and once you accept them, you can change them.

· Develop A Willingness To Experience

If you want to be aware, you have to be willing to be aware, along with all that this may entail. You must be ready to deal with negative emotions and maintain an openness to them, say studies, no matter how complex or uncomfortable they may be. This willingness must then also extend to experiences and circumstances of life. You don’t have to like where you are, but you have to be ready to deal with what comes with it. Only then can you indeed be aware of everything with no sense of denial or avoidance?

· Be Present And Mindful

Mindfulness and the act of being present allow you to pay attention to your emotions, thoughts, and environment, which is an excellent key to awareness. Studies have found that this is a positive part of cultivating acceptance. It works hand in hand with a willingness to experience. And the fact that mindfulness is such an essential part of everyday health and wellbeing helps, too!

4. Take Responsibility

Cultivating acceptance doesn’t mean that you never accept responsibility for the things you’ve done. It’s a big step that should accompany commitment if you truly want to cultivate genuine, positive acceptance. They don’t call it “accepting” responsibility for no reason, after all!

This is because acceptance involves being honest with yourself and the realities of your behaviors, thoughts, and reactions. It means knowing when your actions were less than stellar, understanding how your behavior affects the world around you, seeing your issues, and being at peace with your journey to correct and change them.

When you’re able to hold yourself accountable, you’re also able to accept yourself better. You know that you’re capable of improvement and doing better, so you feel more confident accepting different aspects of yourself. You also know that you’ll be able to handle the world’s challenges and hurdles, so you accept those, too! Here are some ways to start taking responsibility to cultivate acceptance:

· Seek Solutions Instead Of Complaint

It’s easy to fall into the habit of complaining when things don’t go your way or when you’re dealing with something hard to accept. But this only makes it tougher for you to move forward with acceptance! So start focusing on finding solutions and brainstorming ideas for lessons and next steps. This allows you to look to the future and see positive ways to manage your current situation. When you can be optimistic about what’s to come, you can accept things more easily.

· Put Fear Away When You Hope To Cultivate Acceptance

Fear can be overwhelming and overpowering, and it can leave you paralyzed and unable to accept a situation or reality. But the fact of the matter is that you’re the one who has the power to put that fear aside and change the story that it tells you. While it’s okay to take some time to build up the courage to move past fear, it’s also important to remember that it’s up to you to accept the truth about something scary and move forward. When you learn that you’re capable of stepping past fear with your abilities, you’ll be able to accept better that it’s okay to be afraid and still move forward!

· Let Go Of Fears And Biases to Cultivate Acceptance

Have you experienced something devastating that changed your life? It can be complicated to accept the new reality you face. But if you live your life defined by that experience, you’ll never be able to move forward. That’s why letting go is so important. While you have no control over the past, you do have control over the future. Accept the responsibility to shape the journey ahead of you and accept what you can’t change about the past in the process.

Final Thoughts On Some Effective Habits To Cultivate Acceptance

Acceptance will allow you to live a life that focuses on the present, plans for the future, and is at peace with things unchangeable. It’s a wonderful way to live, and you can cultivate acceptance by practicing the proper habits every day!

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