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How Smartphones Impact Child Mental Health, According to Therapists

January 23, 2022 by Chris Butler

Does your child have a smartphone, and you’re worried about the effects it might have on their wellbeing? From the toddler years, children are using electronics to pass the time. Some great apps can enhance their skills, but is the child’s mental health at risk?

According to a study conducted by Today’s Parent, the average age of a child owning a cell phone is around ten. However, having direct ownership and using one each day is different.

Many parents gladly hand off their phones to their young ones to keep them quiet in the car, a restaurant, or other location. Sadly, it may give them a few minutes of peace, but it could cause a lifetime of issues for their kid.

Advantages of Early Exposure to Technology

While it’s easy to point out all the things that are so wrong with technological usage, some good things can come from being exposed. First, kids are becoming more technically literate from an early age. Since the world is run by computers and electronics, getting them a jump start can be advantageous.

1. Better Job Opportunities

The IT field is quickly growing. A study reported by CompTIA found that IT jobs rose more than 134 percent in the past two years. Security breaches and safety concerns have added jobs by the tens of thousands. The future is still a bit unsure as times are constantly changing, but it’s safe to say that having any IT skills will put a child in a better position for the job market.

2. They Learn Academics Early

Your kids learn a lot from watching shows. Take, for instance, Sesame Street. The program started in 1969, and it’s been going strong. The chances are that you grew up watching the same schedule as your children.

The lovable characters and songs teach children how to count, the alphabet, and life lessons about getting along with others and diversity. These likable characters have a way to sing and dance into the heart of your young one in ways that you cannot. Their message of love and acceptance of others is essential.

They also teach the foundations of reading, which prepares them to start school. It’s easy to see some good things happen by letting your child use a smartphone. However, the key is moderation.

Technology is as addicting as any drug, so you must be the one who sets the time limits and guidelines for usage. However, it can spark their creativity and even make them more empathetic, so a little bit doesn’t hurt them.

Five Ways Smartphones Might Harm Child Mental Health

While the smartphone does bring about some peace and calm for a few minutes, what is it doing to the child’s mental health? The Canadian Paediatric Society states that children between the ages of 1-4 should use their cell phones for one hour or less each day. The doctor who headed the study, Michael Cheng, states that it damages developing brains. Here are some issues that can occur with too much technology.

1. They Forgo Outdoor Fun

The cell phone isn’t all bad, as many educational games exist. However, the real issue comes when the child is engaged in technology and not outside getting fresh air. Many children will forgo mealtime, bathroom, and other essential functions to get five more minutes on a game.

Many kids only do other things when the battery is dead or they’ve exhausted their parental time limits. They should get plenty of sunshine, which gives Vitamin D. Nothing good comes about from a child behind four walls all day.

2. Hinders Social Skills and Child Mental Health

Children start preschool at around 3-4 years of age. They must socialize and interact with other children continuously. Some parents opt to forgo preschool and send their kids straight to kindergarten. However, if a child has spent their days mostly on technology, their mental health has been impacted.

Kids who live in the virtual world often feel that the people and characters online are their friends. Thus, they don’t learn how to interact in person. They will gladly take their virtual friends over real ones, but how will this affect them once they go to school?

The child who is never socialized will have issues throughout life. If they constantly turn to the smartphones to be entertained and meet people, they’re missing out greatly. They won’t know how to interact and have quality relationships.

3. Filter-Induced Body Dysmorphia, a Severe Child Mental Health Crisis

While it’s fun for relatives to see babies and young toddlers on the smartphone, the child can’t process all the colors and brightness of the screen. It’s even more confusing for them to add filters that change their appearance.

Young children learn a sense of self when they look in the mirror, but your cell phone and the attached camera are not a replacement that helps them to identify their reflection. Research reported by AI & Society shows that children who don’t engage in regular play and the use of mirrors often have a sense of induced body dysmorphia caused by the use of AR filters.

4. Sedentary Living Leads to Hyperactivity, a Fairly Common Child Mental Health Challenge

The Centers for Disease Control, CDC, estimates that more than 9.4 percent of children develop ADHD before their eighteenth birthday. Of those children, nearly 400,000 are under the age of five. A study cited by Nationwide Children’s Hospital states that the number of children with this neurological condition has grown between 50-80 percent in the past two decades.

It’s believed that there’s a direct correlation between the child’s mental health and the screen time they use. Additionally, there’s also a genuine concern about ADHD and the foods they enjoy, as a diet seems to help reduce such symptoms. Children are more sedentary these days, causing them significant physical and mental health issues.

Their brains may be engaged in an activity, but their bodies are sedentary. They need to move and burn off some of that energy. A child that sits idle for many hours is at a greater risk of developing ADHD.

5. Obesity

Johnny comes home from school, grabs a bag of chips and a handful of cookies, and picks up the smartphone. He sits on the couch playing games and chatting with friends for hours until it’s time for dinner. Then, he eats a massive portion and goes back to his gaming.

He doesn’t move again until his mother tells him it’s time for a bath and bed. So, he’s sat since he got home from school and sat at a desk for most of the day. Now, it’s safe to say that unless Johnny naturally has a high metabolism, he will put on some pounds.

It’s effortless for children to eat mindlessly while playing games or watching programs. He’s lacking the exercise he needs, which will cause him to develop a weight issue. The childhood obesity rates are astronomical.

The CDC estimates that around 19.3 percent of kids fit the criteria for obesity. Additionally, a whopping 13 percent of those kids are between 2-5 years old. How can this not impact the child’s mental health?

Overweight children are more likely to be picked on in school, have low self-esteem, and sit on the sidelines throughout life. This can cause further issues when it’s time to go to college, get a job, and provide for their families.

Tips for Controlling Smartphone Addiction to Improve Child Mental Health

Most parents don’t see how these behaviors start at a young age but can affect people through adulthood. Here are some tips for how to control technology in your home, including smartphones, TVs, computers, and all other electronic devices.

Set strict limits on screentime.
Make outside play mandatory.
Interact with the children through board games and other types of play
Please don’t give a child under ten years of age their phone
Use smartphone monitoring apps to control where your child goes online
Have times when the entire family unplugs and does things the old-fashioned or manual way

There are many benefits to using technology early, but some significant drawbacks can affect your child’s mental health. You can control many issues by implementing some boundaries for cell phone usage. According to the American Pediatric Association, here is the recommended amount of screen time per age:

Birth to 18 Months – Only video chats for short periods
18-24 Months – Short, educational programming only on occasion
2-5 Years – One hour a day of educational programming and three hours on the weekend
6-13 Years – 90 minutes of screentime for regular content and two hours for educational
14-18 Years – Set content guidelines as well as screentime based on the child’s needs

Final Thoughts on the Impact of Child Mental Health and Smartphones

Technology is hard to escape nowadays, as it’s everywhere. However, you should control how much time they spend on a smartphone for your children. It’s just not a good idea for an eight-year-old child to have a phone, as they’re not mentally mature enough for such a responsibility.

The biggest mistake you can make as a parent is using electronics to babysit for you. Sure, it might buy you a few minutes of peace, but it will cause you more significant problems down the road. A sedentary child is at a higher risk of developing obesity, ADHD, and being socially inept.

While telling your child “No” is often challenging, you can assure yourself that setting healthy technological boundaries is imperative for your child’s mental health.

Energy Healer Explains How to Raise Your Vibration to Change Your Life

January 23, 2022 by Kristen Lawrence

An energy healer reads the auras of others and helps them remove blockages to free up stagnant energy. We’re all the products of our thoughts, feelings, and memories, so each of us faces different challenges. Ideally, our energy would flow freely, and we’d have no self-created inhibitions or limits.

We could easily tap into our intuition, that inner voice that helps us discern right from wrong. This acts as an antenna, helping us reach higher realms to guide us in the right direction. When we have static in our energy field, it prevents us from hearing this voice. So, an energy healer’s job involves clearing these blocked energies to embody our highest selves.

Energy healer Christie Marie Sheldon explains more about this concept, revealing how we can shift our inner frequency to change our outer world. Hopefully, this advice will empower and remind you that you’re who you’ve been waiting for. Everything you need lies within. You have to quiet those inner voices that hold you back.

Energy Healer Explains How to Raise Your Vibration to Change Your Life

Everything you see around you appears as solid matter, but energy vibrates at various frequencies. Vibrations of light and sound comprise every living thing on Earth. We all come from the same source; the only difference lies in our thoughts and feelings. These determine our consciousness, which constantly fluctuates according to our reactions to stimuli.

The world may seem like a chaotic, random mess, but it’s a projection of our consciousness. What we think manifests outwardly, determining our reality. That’s why two people can look at something and have entirely different perceptions about it.

When most of us vibrate at higher frequencies, we have peace, harmony, and love. When most people live in lower frequencies, we see fear, hatred, and divisiveness. Our reality on this dense realm we call Earth stems from the cumulation of karma. We have a lot of karma to work out in this current incarnation.

However, we can change outcomes and create a more harmonious world through energy healing. Christie gives some insight on how we can work together to manifest the reality we wish to see.

She says that by understanding energy, “you will then be tapped into the causal plane where everything can be changed.” This realm houses very finely vibrating energy essentially composed of ideas or thoughts. If you can tap into this higher frequency, you can change your thoughts and manifest your desires.

The energy healer explains it further: “Everything you see in the out-picturing of your life is the effect of your life. And everything that created it was created by your thoughts, beliefs, ideologies, and every judgment you’ve ever bought or sold to or from somebody. So those points of view make up your reality.”

Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life

She also cites the Maharishi Effect phenomenon, named after the yogi Maharishi Mahesh Yogi. Known as the founder of Transcendental Meditation, Maharishi stated that if just 1% of the population meditated deeply, it could produce noticeable positive shifts in the world.

Christie spoke on a study by Maharishi where he placed 7,000 monks in various cities across the globe. Afterward, they measured what happened before and after in those cities using scientific methods. In one location, the crime rate dropped 22%. In other cities, pollution decreased, and in Tel Aviv, the stock market went up.

These outcomes prove that we have power beyond measure and can consciously influence our environment.

The energy healer also discussed a book by renowned spiritual teacher and psychiatrist Dr. David R. Hawkins in her talk. Called Power vs. Force: The Hidden Determinants of Human Behavior, the book contains a scale of human emotions. He ranked them from low frequency to high frequency, assigning a rating to each one. The scale is as follows, from high to low vibrational thought:

700+
600
540
500
400
350
310
250
200
175
150
125
100
75
50
30
20

How to Understand These Numbers

As you can see from this scale, guilt and shame produce the lowest frequencies. Christie says that in her clients, she finds that people who harbor these emotions have the most resistance to change. However, by figuring out where these feelings stem from, it’s possible to move past them.

By removing these long-standing beliefs and thoughts which create your being, you can effectively become more “you.” We all can reflect love, peace, and harmony, raising our frequency beyond fear and hatred. What kind of world we wish to create is up to us, but most people live unconsciously. They go about their days on autopilot, not really consciously thinking about their actions.

Simply becoming aware of your thoughts can create a dramatic difference in your life. To do this, sit quietly in the mornings and reflect on your inner world without distractions. Notice what thoughts come up – are they positive or negative? If you want to create a more peaceful, fulfilling life, use positive affirmations such as:

I am enough.
I can do this!
I’m a happy, positive person.
I love myself and everyone around me.
I believe in myself.

Saying these statements to yourself each day will help you become your energy healer and move past distressing emotions. Remember, you’re the one you’ve been waiting for; what you think, you become.

Final Thoughts on Lessons From an Energy Healer to Raise Your Vibration

Be careful what you speak into your life; it’s a conversation with the Universe. If you want a happy life, pay attention to your innermost thoughts and feelings. Energy healer Christie Sheldon explains that you have to go deep within to bring about healing in your life.

By peeling back these layers, you can start to reflect on your true self: a loving, blissful, conscious being. You’re a manifestation of the universe and have a divine purpose on this Earth. You have to quiet the noise in your head and remember who you indeed are.

Emory University Reveals How Grandmother Brains React to Grandchildren

January 22, 2022 by Kristen Lawrence

Science finally reveals why a grandmother beams with joy upon seeing her grandchildren. Grandmas have so much kindness and love to offer and often show it by baking cookies, buying gifts, or simply showering their grandkids affectionately. They also encourage a child’s development and brain health in significant ways.

For the first time, scientists have scanned grandmothers’ brains while looking at photos of their grandchildren. This activity helped them better understand their bond and how grandmas influence their grandkids.

The findings by Emory University researchers published the results in the journal Proceedings of the Royal Society B. It marks the first to investigate grandmaternal brain function.

“What jumps out in the data is the activation in areas of the brain associated with emotional empathy,” says James Rilling, Emory professor of anthropology and lead author of the study. “That really suggests that grandmothers are geared toward feeling what their grandchildren are feeling when they interact with them. If their grandchild is smiling, they’re feeling the child’s joy. And if their grandchild is crying, they’re feeling the child’s pain and distress.”

They also analyzed the brains of grandmothers while viewing pictures of their grown children. Researchers found that brain areas linked to cognitive empathy lit up rather than emotional empathy. This data suggests the grandmother may be trying to understand their child’s thoughts or feelings, but not in a moving way. Age probably plays the most significant factor in these reactions.

“Young children have likely evolved traits to be able to manipulate not just the maternal brain, but the grand maternal brain,” Rilling says. “An adult child doesn’t have the same cute ‘factor,’ so they may not elicit the same emotional response.”

The Grandmother is a Crucial Part of the Family

Minwoo Lee, a Ph.D. candidate in Emory’s Department of Anthropology, and Amber Gonzalez, a former Emory research specialist, co-authored the study.

Lee added she relates to the study since she spent much time around her grandmothers. She has fond memories of them and recalls that they always seemed happy to see her. As an adult, she finally understands their warm, welcoming attitude toward her.

She added that it’s rare to study the older human brain besides dementia or age-related disorders in the scientific world. This makes the research even more special.

“Here, we’re highlighting the brain functions of grandmothers that may play an important role in our social lives and development,” Lee says. “It’s an important aspect of the human experience that has been largely left out of the field of neuroscience.”

Rilling’s research centers around the neural basis of human behavior and social cognition. While neuroscientists have focused chiefly on motherhood, he leads the way in the lesser-known neuroscience of fatherhood.

However, for this study, he wanted to examine the brain response of grandmothers during interactions with their grandchildren. It’s a relatively new topic but has important implications in almost every culture.

“Evidence is emerging in neuroscience for a global, parental caregiving system in the brain,” Rilling says. “We wanted to see how grandmothers might fit into that pattern.”

Traditional Communities Rely on the Grandmother for Survival

In human families, everyone contributes in some way to care for offspring. Of course, mothers are the primary caregivers, but the grandmother also plays a crucial role.

“We often assume that fathers are the most important caregivers next to mothers, but that’s not always true,” Rilling says. “In some cases, grandmothers are the primary helper.”

The “grandmother hypothesis” suggests that human females live well past their reproductive years to support their children and grandchildren. A study of the traditional Hadza people of Tanzania confirms this hypothesis. In their society, grandmothers help forage for food, which offers nutritional benefits to their grandkids.

The authors cite a separate study of traditional communities as well. In this study, having the grandmother around led to more grandchildren being born in a shorter timeframe. So, it seems that the grandmother is the glue holding families together, in a way. Her support ensures a strong, healthy family that works together to survive and thrive in various communities.

In modern societies, evidence shows that children have better academic, physical, social, and behavioral health when their grandmother is actively involved.

Emory University Reveals How Grandmothers’ Brains React to Seeing Grandchildren

For this study, the researchers aimed to understand how engaged grandmothers benefit their families. The team gathered 50 participants for the study and asked them to fill out questionnaires about their experiences as grandmothers. They answered questions about how much time they spent with their grandkids, what activities they did together, and how much love they felt for them.

Researchers also scanned their brains using functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) while viewing their grandchild’s images. They repeated the scans while the grandmother looked at pictures of an unknown child, the same-sex parent of the grandchild, and an adult stranger.

Results indicated that the grandmother viewing pictures of her grandkid had more brain regions associated with emotional empathy and movement. Researchers didn’t note this when they viewed the other images.

However, grandmothers whose brain scans showed more cognitive empathy reported wanting to be more involved with caring for their grandchildren.

“Our results add to the evidence that there does seem to be a global parenting caregiving system in the brain and that grandmothers’ responses to their grandchildren maps onto it,” Rilling says.

Rilling added that interviewing the grandmothers personally was the highlight of the study. “It was fun,” he says. “I wanted to get a sense of the rewards and challenges of being a grandmother.”

“Many of them also said how nice it is to not be under as much time and financial pressure as they were when raising their children,” Rilling says. “They get to enjoy the experience of being a grandmother much more than they did being parents.”

Final Thoughts on a Study Showing How a Grandmother Reacts to Seeing a Grandchild

You probably don’t need a study to prove how much your grandmother loves you. However, it’s interesting to see how the brains of grandmothers light up when they see a picture of their grandchild. So, when you visit your grandmother, give her the biggest hug and tell her how much you appreciate her.

20 Positive Changes to Make for a Better Life (#11 Is Highly Effective)

January 22, 2022 by Kristen Butler

The human experience has often been compared to writing a book. Each person gets a blank volume and the chance to draft their own story. While you can’t erase a chapter from the past, you have a new page to create every day. Every time you have the chance to make positive changes, you only improve the content of that story.

You have the right to success just as much as anybody else in this world. If you’re overwhelmed by doubt, fear, and negativity, you can’t realize your potential. Speaking positive affirmations into the Universe empowers you to believe in yourself and bring your dreams into reality.

Twenty Positive Changes to Make for a Better Life

Are you tired of just existing and settling for the second-best? Even though you can’t change the world alone, you can change yourself and your attitude. Consider these twenty helpful hints for positive changes that will make a difference in your life.

1. Speak Blessings Instead of Curses to Attract Positive Changes

Start using the law of attraction to bring positive changes to your life. The Universal Mind knew and loved you before you were born and destined you for greatness. Your first step into your best life is to speak positive affirmations.

When you speak blessings to yourself and others, the Universe responds in kind. You’ll attract the same benefits you say. Use compassionate affirmations and agree with your Higher Power that you’re loved, worthy, and eternally blessed.

2. Get the Sleep You Need

Your body cannot stay in perpetual motion. It depends on your circadian rhythm for optimal sleep/wake hours. While you sleep, your brain and body get the chance to rest and recharge for the next day.

An article published by the American Academy of Sleep Medicine explains the link between sleep deprivation and negative thought patterns. Do you want to be more optimistic? Try to get at least six to eight hours of sleep each night.

3. Plan Your Day According to Your Energy Levels

Have you ever noticed that your energy levels wax and wane throughout the day? This is called your ultradian rhythm, and it varies by individual. You may feel your best in the morning and be in an energy slump by midday.

Or perhaps you’re a night owl, and you’re lively and creative in the evenings. Discovering your peak energy times can bring positive changes at home and work. Consider keeping a journal of your energy levels and planning your most ardent tasks during those times.

4. Organize Your Space to Make Room

Maybe one of the reasons you don’t accomplish what you want is because your space is cluttered and disorganized. Positive changes start by clearing the clutter in your home, office, and mind.

Keep only the necessary things or those that warm your heart and get rid of the rest. Dispel grudges and negative attitudes that hamper your mind and spirit. Create an unobstructed, beautiful space that’s conducive to positivity, dreaming, and creativity.

5. Don’t Skip Breakfast (Making Positive Changes Needs Fuel!)

You’re not doing yourself any favors by skipping breakfast. Are your mornings usually a mad rush trying to get out the door on time? At most, you may grab a sugar-ladened toaster pastry on your way to the car.

When you don’t replenish your energy in the morning, you’ll experience the dreaded afternoon blahs. Instead, try to awaken earlier and plan quick, easy, and nutritious breakfasts. Your body will thank you for being more productive.

6. Revive Your Spirit with Music

Do you feel tired and gloomy and need an emotional recharge? Since the beginning, music has been the universal calm and inspiration. Pep yourself up with a lively beat or relax and focus with easy-listening or classical tunes.

Do you play a musical instrument? Maybe it’s time to learn how to make your music. Why not take lessons in your spare time or get some instruction online?

7. Dress Colorfully to Reflect the Positive Changes You Will Manifest

Take a cue from nature and see the vibrant colors of the plants and animals. There’s nothing attractive about wearing dull, drab clothing. You can even make a gray outfit sparkle when you add a splash of color.

Of course, you don’t want to look like a clown. Find the colors that look best for your skin tone and use them to your advantage. Making positive changes in your wardrobe can boost your self-esteem. Plus, you’re not channeling happiness if you feel uncomfortable in your clothes.

8. Stay Hydrated with Water

Since your body is made of a high percentage of water, you need to stay hydrated. It’s essential for all body functions, and you would die without it. However, you may be dehydrated and not even know it.

An article published by the Mayo Clinic recommends at least 11.5 cups of water a day for women and 15.5 cups for men. Water naturally flushes toxins from your system and keeps your cells plump and healthy. Keep a bottle of fresh water with you wherever you go.

9. Use A Timer

The human mind works on a reward system, and you can use it to your advantage. When you need to focus on a task, consider using a timer set for 60 minutes. Minimize distractions and be as productive as you can for that hour.

When the timer buzzes, set in again for 10 minutes. It’s your free time as a reward for your hard work. Use it to read, take a walk, or even a quick power nap.

10. Be Accountable to Someone

If you only have yourself to answer to, it can be easy to slack off a bit. However, giving an account to another person can make you feel more responsible. When you’re making positive changes like weight loss or breaking addiction, having a partner can help your outcome.

You can create a buddy system with your mate, trusted friend, or family member. Choose someone who has experience or is struggling with the same challenges. When you feel disheartened, you both have a buddy who will listen and encourage you.

11. Release Negative People

Unfortunately, you’ll always have at least one negative person in your inner circle. You may not change their attitude, but you can control their influence over you. Let go of toxic relationships and people who are dragging you down.

Surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you. Their supportive love gives you the confidence to make positive affirmations that happen. Those naysayers who can’t be supportive don’t belong in your circle.

12. Save Your Change

You’d be surprised at how quickly spare change can add up in a jar. Just a quick sweep of your sofa cushions and car floor may yield a whole handful of coins. Save all your change in a container and use it for a vacation or something else you’ve always wanted.

13. Making Positive Changes Means You Must Dig Deep and Learn Something New Each Day

Your brain craves a challenge and can’t tolerate boredom. Boost your mental power by learning new things. Consider studying a foreign language or reading about a subject that’s always piqued your curiosity.

14. Hit the Unsubscribe Button

If you’re like most people, your email account is overflowing with countless junk emails. The same can be said of all the junk mail and catalogs that are crammed in your post box. Unsubscribe to all spam emails and ask to be taken off any unwanted mailing lists.

15. Read a Chapter a Day

People who love to read will always be open to new concepts and adventures. Fiction can take you to another place and time and give your mind a rest. Try to read at least one chapter a day and choose different genres.

16. Snack Smart (PoP Staff Favorite of the Positive Changes List)

Are you among the long line of coworkers by the vending machines? This junk food may satisfy your hunger, but it can spike your blood sugar and make you tired. Prepare portioned healthy snacks to bring to work or eat when busy at home.

17. Do the Most Dreaded First

No matter what you do in life, you’ll always have tasks that you don’t enjoy. Maybe it’s laundry, dishes, balancing the checkbook, or doing reports at work. Aim to get these dreaded chores out of your way first, and you’ll have the rest of your time for more enjoyable things.

18. Show Gratitude for All You Have…and the Positive Changes You Will Soon See

Bring more positive changes in your life by being grateful for what you already have. You may find it helpful to keep a gratitude journal or keep a list posted where you see it each day. Meditation is an excellent way to express your gratitude mindfully.

19. Get Your Body Moving

It’s nearly impossible to make a difference in your life when you live a sedentary lifestyle. Be kind to your body and find a daily exercise regimen that works for you. Walking in nature, swimming, and playing sports are ideal fun exercises.

20. Reconnect with Yourself

You must know who you are and where you’re going. Take time to reconnect with your inner-self and listen to what your body says. Don’t be so distracted with the cares of life that you lose your individuality.

Final Thoughts on Making Positive Changes and Claiming Your Rightful Power

Are you longing for a better life? Your power to make positive changes begins in your mind. You can have more joy and satisfaction when you incorporate these and other helpful suggestions into your routine.

15 Signs of a Karmic Connection Never to Overlook

January 22, 2022 by Chris Butler

Occasionally, you have a deep connection with someone that alters the course of your life because it’s so powerful. Some people call this person their soul mate, but it’s a passionate yet turbulent relationship that goes beyond the realm of understanding. It’s a karmic connection that few can grasp, but fate sent them into your life for a purpose.

You get so caught up in the way you feel that you forget that things with this person aren’t what you imagine from the fairytales. You can’t think of letting them go, but they’re not here long term, only long enough to teach you valuable lessons.

Understanding the Concept of a Karmic Connection

Everyone wants to find their soulmate or the one person meant for only them. However, many individuals find that they have a different experience that feels the same, but it’s called a karmic connection, and it’s vastly different. These are relations where you love one another but drive each other crazy.

The key is understanding what this connection means and realizing that this person can help or test you in your journey. The difference between having a karmic association versus finding what many call a “soulmate” is that the bond is different. This person is meant to be in your life, but not to nurture and care for you until your golden years.

While they make you feel butterflies and see stars, they also drive you to the point of rage at times. These connections serve a purpose, but it’s not the stuff dreams are made of. It isn’t evident when your feelings are involved as you want these associations to work so much, but it’s not healthy or what you need to be your best self.

For those who have been in and out of meaningful relations but never had anything substantial, you may be relieved to find that all was not lost. Many people come into your life to test you or help you grow into a better person.

You may not want this association to end, but some folks come into your life as nothing more than a learning experience. When this person crosses your path by way of the Universe, the lesson and connections will be epic. Most people find that these relations are profound almost on a spiritual level, even if they only last briefly.

You might consider this connection like that of riding an airplane. Things are smooth sailing for a bit, but turbulence hits, and you think the whole thing will crash. Then, suddenly it all seems to clear, and you’re back to sunny skies.

This constant back-and-forth cycle will drive you to the brink of exhaustion, but you’ll learn. It takes a powerful person to break free, but all is not lost. The things you discover will help you in the next relationship.

15 Signs of a Karmic Connection

Remember that a karmic connection is deep and intense, but it’s not always the best connection for you. You feel this strong urge to be together, but there are many obstacles along the way.

They’re not the person to be with you throughout eternity, but they do teach you some good and bad lessons along the way. Here are fifteen signs that you’re in a karmic connection.

1. You Have an Instant Bond

From the beginning, the connection between you two was passionate and quick. You felt an instant draw, and you couldn’t tear yourself away from them. You think they’re your soulmate, but you still have doubts, too, because of how rocky the road is between you two.

2. The Association Feels Addicting if its a Karmic Connection

You want them more than your next breath. If you don’t have them in your life, you won’t make it. You feel addicted to them like a drug, and you can’t get enough.

3. You Develop a Codependency

One of the signs of karma in a connection is that you develop codependency. Your life is dependent on your partner, and you can’t do anything without them. You’ve lost your sense of individuality, and your association is unbalanced.

4. A Whirlwind of Highs and Lows

There are so many highs and lows with this person that you feel like you’re on a roller coaster. One minute you’re joyful and laughing, and the next, you’ve broken up for the third time this week. It’s exhausting keeping up with you two.

5. Feelings of Jealousy and Possessiveness

All the uncertainty and trouble in the association bring out your worst. Both of you may feel jealous and possessive due to the turbulence in the connection. According to a study done by Penn State University, many people develop these jealousy issues when they feel they will lose someone.

The article further states that a little bit of jealousy is not always a bad thing, but it can quickly get out of hand. You can bring baggage from a past partner with a loss, which only contributes to these feelings of distrust.

6. Karmic Connections Might Bring Out the Worst in You

When karma is involved, the association may be quite different. While your soul mate will enhance and complete you, the karmic connection does the exact opposite. It’s not uncommon to find yourself becoming an entirely different person when you’re with this individual.

7. Volatile and Unpredictable

The situation is very volatile and completely unpredictable. Even a little argument about what kind of jelly to put on toast can turn into a reason to end things. It seems like the smallest of infractions start an inferno of emotion and rage.

8. Same Fights Repeatedly

Sometimes it feels like the same story but on a different day. The arguments have become repetitive as well as the behaviors. It’s just mentally grueling, and the situation has become a toxic union.

9. Karmic Connections Can Be Completely Exhausting

When you live in a constant state of upheaval, you’re constantly arguing, and the passion only lasts for a tiny bit. The whole situation is overwhelming. You can’t imagine one day without them, but the days are long and tiring.

10. Lots of Drama and Sentiments

You never know what’s going to hit you today, and you’re always waiting for the next shoe to drop. The constant drama seems to wipe you out, as well as the emotions they bring along with it. You wish you could get off the merry-go-round of emotional drama, but then again, you don’t think you can live without them.

11. You Ignore the Red Flags

There have been so many red flags in this association, but you ignore everyone. Even if someone came to you and told you something horrible, they did; you would get angry but never leave. You feel like going without them would take the very breath from your body.

12. Underlying Fear

Though you hate to admit it, you’re scared. You live every day wondering if this will be the day that things end. To lose them feels like losing a limb, and you don’t know if you can go on.

13. Inclined Towards Unhealthy Addictions

Sadly, many of these connections have addictive tendencies. They may cause you to drink, smoke, or do drugs. Being with this person makes you inclined to take a walk on the wild side.

Having physical relations with them is just as addicting as lust is another drug you crave. The problem is that after you’ve sufficed all the addictions to cope with the pain, there are still some abusive natures to this connection that you cannot deny.

14. Controlling

The fear of losing one another makes for a controlling situation. You both likely feel these intense sentiments of lust, emotional turmoil, and the all-around war on some days.

Your addiction to each other is hard to break. What do you do when you’re afraid you’re going to lose someone? You control them so that you can attempt to keep them.

15. Karmic Connections Might Not Respect Boundaries

According to Psycho Logs, you need healthy boundaries with your partner because it helps to facilitate mutual understanding. Everyone has limits, and they don’t want to be pushed far beyond these guidelines. However, you’ve found that your association has no boundaries, and you two know how to make buttons just to upset the other one.

Final Thoughts on Karmic Connections

Karmic connections challenge you. However, this person provides you with an opportunity to step into a more robust phase in life. They’re helping you become a better you.

You will experience a rollercoaster of emotions, and some baggage may come from this connection. Still, you’re a better person for the journey. The good news is that you can heal from this, and through this person, you will learn what’s healthy and unhealthy in a partner.

One of the best things about these connections is that they teach you all about self-love. It shows you that there’s significant importance in taking care of yourself. They also teach you how important it is to have mental peace, a good sense of self-worth, and take care of your psychological and physical health.

Due to the deep connection, you will likely mistake this bond for a soulmate, but few of these karmic relations last. While you may feel like you can never let that person go, you should know that you can!

15 Meaningful Ways to Celebrate Relationship Milestones

January 22, 2022 by Chris Butler

The very essence of being a human being is to grow, change, and become and do more. From an infant, you were hitting milestones as you grew and developed. You celebrated small victories from your first steps to high school graduation. But what about your relationship milestones?

Are you currently celebrating all the things you accomplish as a couple? If you’ve been with your partner for a long time, you’ve learned that marriage and commitment are challenging. There are good days, bad days, and times when you want to walk away and never see them again.

However, you quickly come to your senses and realize you have something worth keeping. Since your union is so unique, why not celebrate the little things along the way? While you grow and evolve as a person, you do the same as a couple. These little affirmations of your accomplishment nourish your continued growth by encouraging you and your soul mate.

Another exciting aspect of celebrating these milestones is that it allows you a chance to reflect on how far you’ve come, and it also allows you to make continued goals for the future.

Fifteen Meaningful Ways to Celebrate Relationship Milestones

When you have anniversaries as a couple, there are gifts that you’re supposed to buy. According to Hallmark, the first anniversary is a gift of paper. But by the time you get to the 40th celebration, it’s a ruby. The longer you are together, the more clout you have as a couple, and the gifts’ value increases.

Not every celebration warrants a precious stone, but you can always celebrate in the ways you see fit. While many people don’t stick to these old traditions, celebrating your romantic milestones is essential. Here are fifteen ways to celebrate your love and accomplishments and help sustain your union.

1. Get a Cake to Mark Relationship Milestones

Is there never a good time for cake? Whether it’s birthdays, anniversaries, or celebrations, someone must bring the cake. A cake is just a little token that shows you’ve done well.

You can pick one up at your local supermarket with moral sentiments written on top, or you can go a little more upscale and order one from a gourmet bakery. Why not celebrate those relationship milestones with a sweet treat? Very few people don’t put the cake together with celebrations, as it sort of goes together like a hand and glove.

2. Share Fun Experiences

Many people put a lot of focus into buying material possessions, which often means little. Why not make memories. If you’ve had a significant accomplishment as a couple, then why not share something fun like ice skating, snowboarding, or another adventure that you will look back on with smiles?

Just think of all the photo opportunities you can share with the world, your children, and keep in a scrapbook that honors your love.

3. Treat Yourself to a Gift

A special occasion calls for a gift. Remember all the rewards as kids and how fondly you look back on those days? Relationship milestones can be celebrated with a unique token when you have relationship milestones. Imagine a beautifully crafted necklace or ring, designed specifically to honor your journey together, capturing the essence of your bond in every detail. For example, for 7th wedding anniversary celebration, a piece of custom jewelry can symbolize the strength and beauty of your partnership. Whether it’s a piece featuring the gemstones of your birth months or an intricate design that reflects your shared experiences, this personalized touch will make the occasion unforgettable. Custom jewelry not only serves as a stunning accessory but also as a lasting reminder of the love and commitment you’ve built over the years.

Gifts are a wonderful way to honor a meaningful moment, whether it’s an anniversary, birthday, or simply a gesture of appreciation. Think of something that not only brings joy in the moment but also offers sentimental value long after the celebration. A carefully chosen gift can evoke memories of a special day every time it’s seen or used, deepening the connection between you and your loved one. For instance, a custom music fridge magnet could be a sweet addition to your home, showcasing a favorite song or melody that has significance in your relationship. It’s a small yet meaningful token that can continuously remind you both of the soundtrack to your love story.

4. Create Pin Board or Collage, Adding Relationship Milestones Over the Years

Vision boards are all the rage right now, but you can also do a celebration board. You can do a timeline to see where you started and where you’re at now.

Why not add some pictures of your journey to help personalize it? Is there any better way to showcase your love throughout the years than with such a commemorative piece?

5. Pop Open a Bottle of Champagne

Champagne is the standard way to celebrate anything, but romantic accomplishments are incredibly fantastic. If you’ve made it any length of time, and have weathered many storms, then pop open some bubbly and rejoice.

Maybe you bought your first home, adopted a child, or had another major milestone. You can always incorporate this way to celebrate with other methods on the list. Who doesn’t want some cake while drinking little sparkling spirits?

6. Take the Day Off

Sometimes the best way to celebrate those relationship triumphs is by doing nothing. Why not take the day off and spend it together watching TV and snuggling? You deserve a break, so why not give it to yourself? The term “Netflix and chill” is undoubtedly a good idea for having a personal day.

7. Throw a Party

If the milestone is excellent, it calls for a more significant scale celebration. Having a party with friends and loved ones can enhance the occasion by having the entire crowd help you celebrate. There’s nothing better than celebrating when it’s done surrounded by all those you love.

8. Do Something on Your Bucket List

If you don’t have a bucket list, now is the time to put one together. Now, why not cross one of those items off your list in celebration of your milestone? Maybe you’ve always wanted to skydive, so why not make this the way you celebrate?

9. Plan a Themed Dinner to Match Any Relationship Milestones

Themed dinners are few and far between, but they’re so much fun. Why not have some friends get in on the action and create a night to remember? You can go to the Old West and have foods that commemorate this period, or you can even do something Spanish with some delicious cuisine.

No matter your age, it’s always exciting to have a night of fun and some appropriate themes to go along with it.

10. Upgrade Something

While it’s not usually exciting to upgrade an appliance or something you need, it can be done to commemorate something. For instance, if you’ve been together for 20 years and raised four kids, then you might think you deserve that high-efficiency washer and dryer you’ve always wanted. Celebrating can be nothing more than upgrading, and that’s okay too, especially if it’s a car or house.

11. Get a Special Piece of Jewelry

Nothing says love like diamonds. Many folks think that jewelry is the perfect way to celebrate those relationship milestones. Maybe it’s time to upgrade your promise or wedding rings? No wonder so many people like to buy jewelry gifts, as it appreciates in value and is very sentimental.

12. Frame Your Success

Some things are just worth framing, like a marriage license. There are documents, pictures, and other memorabilia that belong on the wall for all to see. Be proud of your journey and how far you’ve come, and why not showcase it as a constant reminder of where you’ve been and where you’re going?

13. Go on a Road Trip

It’s always a good time to hit the open road. Whether you take a plane, train or automobile doesn’t matter, but it’s all about the quality time you get to spend together. According to an article on What to Get My, they state that road trips are an excellent time to catch up on passion, share heart-filled moments, enjoy new experiences, and have fun.

14. Book Something Massive

Have you always wanted to go to Europe or swim with the sharks? If you’ve achieved a significant relationship milestone, then it calls for pulling out all the stops. Why not celebrate by doing something that will go down in history as a hallmark for your relationship?

Sometimes, you need to treat yourself big. In an era where people constantly rush in and out of relationships, you need to celebrate those milestones with pride.

15. Get Dressed Up and Go Out for the Biggest Relationship Milestones

When was the last time you put on a shirt and tie or fancy dress and went out on the town in style? They’re just not enough occasions these days that warrant getting all dolled up. However, when you hit milestones and want to celebrate, why not put on your Sunday best and paint the town red?

Relationship Milestones to Celebrate Always

These little milestones might not be a big deal to others, but they don’t know the stories behind the victory. When you, as a couple, have accomplished important things, you owe it to yourself to celebrate. What are some of the things you can honor?

•Employment advances or raises

•Anniversary (dating – first kiss- saying “I love you”)

•Birthdays

•Paying off a large debt

•Having a child

•Buying a home or car

•Anything special to you both

Final Thoughts on Celebrating Relationship Milestones

The above-listed milestones are just a few, but they’re certainly not the only ones that call for celebration. You’ve probably commemorated many things that aren’t included but are still unique to you.

Anything that your relationship experiences are markers that you should honor. In the end, the goal is all about building a wonderful life together. If you were married for over 50 years, would not all your shared experiences be worth celebrating? Of course, they were.

If you want to live together, make it the long haul, and have a good time along the way, then you learn to celebrate the little things that make your union so unique.

15 Emotionally Abusive Relationship Signs People Ignore Until It’s Too Late

January 21, 2022 by Chris Butler

Being in a healthy relationship can lead to a joyful and fulfilling life. As a couple, you share your dreams, happiness, sorrow, and fears as you support one another. However, what if you’re trapped in an emotionally abusive relationship?

Abuse comes in many forms, including physical, mental, verbal, and emotional. Each is just as painful and unconscionable. The internal bruises from psychological abuse aren’t as apparent as those on the body. Any person who perpetrates any abuse can’t be excused or tolerated.

Fifteen Warning Signs of an Abusive Relationship

Does your relationship bring joy and security or pain and fear? Is your person gentle, loving, and kind, or are they volatile and manipulative? Here are fifteen tell-tale signs of an emotionally abusive relationship and why you should leave.

1. A Partner in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship Will Criticize and Humiliate You

When your partner kindly offers constructive criticism with your best interests at heart, it benefits you. You realize that you can share any idea or project with them, and they will be sincere. However, unfounded criticism is cruel and intended to crush your spirit.

They fire off these mean-spirited comments in a snide or condescending way. They are usually generalized and are not helpful. After listening to these degrading remarks for so long, you often internalize them. Soon, your mind is playing perpetual loops of false statements that can destroy your self-esteem.

2. There’s No Support in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

In an article published by Current Opinions in Psychiatry, Maija Reblin and Dr. Bert N. Uchino suggest a strong link between emotional support and your health. Validation and emotional support are basic human needs. If you don’t have it, you can eventually develop serious issues that affect your entire well-being.

Of all the people in your support network, you would expect your mate to be your top cheerleader. Whether you win or lose, you know they have your back and will always be encouraging. If your partner is constantly crushing your dreams and isn’t there for you emotionally, it may be time to evaluate the relationship.

3. It’s Always Your Fault

Mature and conscientious people take responsibility for their shortcomings and mistakes and correct them. There’s no such thing as a perfect person or couple. You and your significant other will occasionally mess up and must apologize.

Toxic partners often have narcissistic personalities and rely on manipulation and gaslighting. When you confront them for something wrong they did, they will try to shift the blame to you or others. They may go so far as to demand a confession and apology from you for their offenses.

4. They Refuse to Let You Socialize

For an abusive relationship to last, the toxic mate must isolate you from your family and friends. They want to be the sole source of controlling your thoughts and actions. It’s also a way to prevent you from disclosing these cruel tactics to anyone.

This self-centered person must have you all to themselves. Such isolation is damaging to your mental and spiritual health. Sadly, you may feel like a prisoner in your own home whose feelings aren’t considered.

5. Jealousy Issues Are Over the Top in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Manipulative partners usually have trust issues and extreme jealousy. Their skewed perception considers family, friends, co-workers, and even strangers as a threat to their control over you. If they allow you a rare time to socialize, they must be at your side like a vicious guard dog.

Discussing the issue with them is futile because they’ll disregard your concerns. Furthermore, they would probably turn the situation around on you as if you’re the jealous one. It sends up a red flag to your family and friends that you’re being smothered and emotionally abused.

6. They Keep Tabs on You

In a healthy relationship, it’s normal for a couple to check in with each other when they’re on the road or away for a while. It’s also okay to call or occasionally text to relay important information. However, manipulative mates can’t trust you alone for any time without blowing up your phone.

Such behavior goes beyond loving communication and concerns and is a control tactic. They may also breach your right to privacy by secretly following you, reading your email, and eavesdropping on your conversations. Instead of being your compassionate partner, they are your prison warden. Of course, telling lies is their specialty, not yours.

7. There’s A Double Standard in Almost Every Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Everyone strives to be fair in a wholesome relationship. You love each other enough to make mutual compromises, so each is happy. If your significant other imposes standards on you that don’t apply to them, your relationship is one-sided and toxic.

These double standards can appear in every aspect of their control over you. They are free to socialize with family and friends, but you get verbally attacked if you do. If you aren’t equal in all matters, you’re being hurt and cheated.

8. Constant Fighting

Occasional arguing is not only usual in a relationship, but it’s also healthy. It shows that both of you retain your unique ideas and opinions. However, a loving couple knows how to apologize and make compromises as needed.

Chronic fighting isn’t beneficial and can wreak havoc on your well-being. Having someone yelling at you constantly is devastating to your self-worth. You want to be in a compassionate, loving relationship and not a war.

9. You Hide Their Behavior from Friends and Family

Another tell-tale sign of an emotionally abusive relationship is your irrational desire to protect your manipulative partner. When you are allowed to socialize with family and friends, you’re afraid to discuss the abuse because of the repercussions later. You may try to present your relationship with your toxic mate in the best light.

Unfortunately, you may start to believe the lie yourself. If you’re so afraid to tell your friends the truth about your mate, then you’re in denial. You may try to protect your person, but you’re only hurting yourself in the long run.

10. You Walk on Eggshells

It’s unnerving to be around someone whose temper is as volatile as a vial of nitroglycerin. When that emotional powder keg is your partner, it’s even worse. You may feel like you must watch each word or action for fear that they’ll explode.

Such an emotionally abusive relationship keeps your nerves on edge and your stress levels high. According to an article published by IBCCES Learning Center, emotional abuse can trigger anxiety, depression, and other severe mental conditions. Living under such pressure isn’t worth it.

11. There’s No Effort from Them

Another inequity in an emotionally abusive relationship is that you do one the work. You must do everything to keep the relationship going while your partner does nothing. All the responsibility for love, devotion, understanding, and effort falls in your lap.

12. They Manipulate You to Stay

Why would a kind, sensible, and worthy person like you stay in an emotionally abusive relationship? If you’re with a manipulative narcissist, they’ll give you plenty of fake reasons. If they constantly threaten you with a breakup, if you don’t comply with their wishes, then they’re toxic and not your true love.

They may also try to manipulate your sense of obligation as if you owe them your devotion. If you aren’t a silent prisoner, then they are walking out the door.

13. They’re Verbally Abusive

While it’s normal for couples to split, it’s never an excuse for name-calling and verbal abuse. It’s often associated with an emotionally abusive relationship and is just as cruel and hurtful as physical abuse. Screaming, cursing, and name-calling by an evil partner leave lasting scars in your heart that are slow to heal.

14. You Experience Emotional Abuse (Which Might Not Be as Obvious as it Sounds!)

An emotionally abusive relationship works like a boa constrictor as it slowly squeezes away your life. The toxic mate’s goal is to continually tell lies to make you compliant and meek. What’s worse is that you may eventually believe you’re worthless and deserve their abuse.

If there’s any fault in the relationship, they want you to shoulder it. This abuse batters your mind and soul until you lose your identity and purpose. Until you take a stand against them, you remain shackled in the dark dungeon of their warped control.

15. Your Codependent on Your Partner in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Not only do you lose yourself in an emotionally abusive relationship, but you also lose those closest to you. These are your true friends and family who have your best interest at heart. It’s not that they want to leave your circle; it’s that you’ve allowed your manipulative partner to force them away.

Now, they have you right where they want you: discouraged, scared, and lonely. You can only turn to them, and you’re finally their prisoner. Such codependency puts this narcissist at the center of your world just as they planned.

Final Thoughts on Identifying and Coping With Emotionally Abusive Relationships

The freedom you deserve comes the moment you realize that you’re being cruelly manipulated and abused. You can only “try” as long as your partner is willing to change. If all else fails, don’t be ashamed of the lessons you learned. Refuse to be part of their vile contempt and regain control of your life. Walk away with your dignity as a beautiful, loving, and worthy person.

7 Types of Romantic Hugs That Really Show the Love

January 21, 2022 by Deborah Tayloe

The human touch provides an essential connection between people and those they love. Infants instinctively cling to their parents at birth and soon equate it with love and security. Romantic hugs are a way for couples to connect and display their affection.

In America, greeting close friends and family with a warm hug is common. However, this benign sign of affection isn’t shared globally. According to a study published by Aalto University, the level of people’s comfort with another person’s touch varies by country, gender, and relationship.

Science and Cuddling

The hug is so entrenched in American culture that we celebrate National Hug Day on January 21st every year. Archeological evidence suggests that humans have been huggers for thousands of years. The report also mentions that the average hug lasts about 3.17 seconds.

Hugs have different meanings, the same as the word love. There’s the kinship love and hug you give to your parents and extended family. It’s different from the “side hug” you give your best friend or close coworker. Perhaps your place of worship encourages a hug of fellowship with same-gender members.

All these are genuine hugs, but they aren’t the ones of lovers. Just as you may say you “love” your grandmother or “love” your best friend, you have romantic love for your significant other. It’s the same way with your romantic hugs.

Two Essential Rules for Embracing

There aren’t any ironclad rules for hugging your mate. However, you must use your intuition to know the right time to cuddle them and when to leave them alone. Even the book of Ecclesiastes 5:3 advises that there’s a time to embrace and a time to refrain from such things.

When you see that your lover had a tough day at work, your supportive hug can mean the world to them. It’s also a nonverbal affirmation that reminds them that they are “the one” and always will be. A heartfelt cuddle is soothing in the evenings and helps you both relax and enjoy each other’s company.

1. Hands Off

If you follow the ancient wisdom of King Solomon, you’ll realize when to keep your hands to yourself. If you’ve had a spat and your mate is angry with you, it’s probably not a good idea to reach out for a bear hug. It can come across as condescending, making them even more furious.

When your person is deep in thought or working toward a deadline, give them some space. You mean well by wrapping your arms around them, but it might disrupt their train of thought. Of course, if they are stressed and overwhelmed, your loving presence may be welcomed.

2. Together But Different

While many couples are bound in love by common interests, some are attracted to opposites. Even in a long, healthy relationship, teams still have their individuality. You and your partner may differ in culture, religion, and philosophy.

The relationship works because you respect each other’s opinions and preferences and compromise as needed. The hug rules require more sensitivity when a hugger loves a non-hugger. Your family may hug everyone in their path while your partner hails from a family that doesn’t display affection.

If you’re the hugger, you must respect your non-hugger’s boundaries. Allow your lover to hug or not hug as they prefer. They could be affectionate behind closed doors but are uncomfortable around others.

Romantic Hugs Are More Than Intimacy

According to an article published by CNN, most women say they want more than just physical intimacy in a relationship. They crave hugs and cuddling for assurance and a spiritual connection. Unfortunately, most men are biologically inclined to forget the romantic portion.

It’s imperative to be sensitive to your partner’s needs, both males and females. Don’t forget the gentle caresses and cuddling that say you need to be close to them. Such nonverbal communication goes a long way in a healthy relationship.

Seven Types of Romantic Hugs

Do you and your partner hug the same way every time? Learn to be spontaneous and what each type says about how you feel. These are seven types of romantic hugs to consider.

1. Eye-to-Eye Romantic Hugs

If you’ve recently fallen in love or are still crazy about your mate, this may be one of your favorite romantic hugs. Both you and your significant other are poised as if you are ready to dance. Usually, the shorter partner has their arms lifted and loosely circled the taller one’s neck and shoulders.

The hallmark of this enduring embrace is eye-to-eye contact. The loving glow in each other’s eyes mesmerizes you and your partner. Reassuring words of affection often accompany the eye-to-eye type.

2. The Loving Straddle

The straddle is perhaps one of the most intimate of romantic hugs. It’s almost complete body contact with your eyes locked in a romantic gaze. You can hug this way when your partner relaxes in a chair or the side of the bed. You sit on their knees with your legs on each side of their legs.

Since it’s such a close togetherness, the straddle is mainly reserved for private moments. However, you may get by as a public display of affection if it’s playful and not too intimate. Some embraces are best kept in the privacy of your home.

3. I’ve Got Your Back

Surprising your special someone with a romantic hug face-to-face isn’t easy. But when you cuddle them from behind, your sweet affection may make their day. The back style is done when your mate’s back is turned, and they’re often preoccupied.

You gently encircle your arms around their neck while you lean your chest against their upper back. It’s almost like spooning, except you’re both standing. Think of the iconic back hug Patrick Swayze gave Demi Moore in the movie “Ghost.” That moment and intimate connection captivated audiences and made movie history.

4. Long, Comforting Romantic Hugs

According to an article published by Forbes Magazine, science proves the benefits of hugs. The power of touch releases hormones that can lower stress and your blood pressure. Plus, it can be a silent gesture that soothes anxiety, as stated in the article.

A long-lasting snuggle usually involves strong emotions such as loss and grief. You offer it to family and close friends when they are having a difficult time. When used romantically, it provides assurance. Or, you can hug this way when you plan to be apart for a while.

It revels in the closeness that neither of you wants to end. You share loving and positive energy from heart to heart. It says, “I’m here for you, and I’ll hold your hand and heart forever.”

5. The Twirl (Romantic Hugs Like You See in the Movies)

The twirl is a classic cuddle that’s reminiscent of a dance. It’s a celebration of joy and youthful love. However, you must ensure that you and your partner are up for lifting and twirling. The twirl is the most spontaneous and attractive to all the romantic hugs to onlookers.

It usually starts with you running into your mate’s outstretched arms. They catch you at the waist, lift you overhead, and do a little ballet-like twirl. A kiss in midair often accompanies it.

Don’t feel bad if one or both of you can’t do the lifting or twirling. You can have the same romantic effect by rushing into each other’s arms and twirling as in a ballroom dance step. The twirl is even more dramatic when they bend you back for a sweet kiss as you raise one foot.

6. The Catcher

The catcher is a passionate twin of the twirl because both involve running and lifting. These are romantic hugs you see when a couple is rescued or reunited in the movies. It exclaims, “I’ve missed you,” or “never going to let you go.”

As with twirl, the catcher begins with you rushing into the outstretched arms of your beloved. They squeeze you tight at the waist but don’t lift you over their head. Instead, they raise you just enough to bring your feet off the ground, usually bent upwards at the knees.

7. The Cuddler Romantic Hugs

Not all romantic hugs are passionate and boisterous. Like the cuddle bug, some are tranquil and relay their amorous message without a word. While parents often cuddle their children to offer comfort and parental love, this cuddling hug differs.

You can do the cuddle bug while relaxing on the sofa watching a favorite movie. Both you and your partner are gently wrapped up together in each other’s arms. Perhaps they are lying on your shoulder or lap, or you’re intimately snuggled under a cozy blanket.

This warm cuddle is restful and playful, especially after a long day. At the same time, it fulfills an innate desire for closeness and safety. It tells your person that you feel secure and satisfied in their arms.

Final Thoughts about the Role of Romantic Hugs in Your Relationship

Perhaps nothing brings you closer to your person than a heartfelt hug. The way you cuddle each other communicates how you’re feeling now. As lovers, you instinctively know each other’s touch and the eternal connection it creates.

6 Signs of Codependent Behavior (And How to Break The Cycle)

January 21, 2022 by Lakeisha Ethans

Codependent behavior is a psychological condition that involves an unhealthy relationship attachment style. Initially, counselors use the term primarily to refer to partners and family members involved with a person struggling with addiction. However, the definition has since expanded and updated to include a broader range of different toxic attachments.

A lot of codependency is rooted in childhood trauma and instability. This is what makes it so difficult to overcome its behaviors. If you constantly feel exhausted from taking care of everyone else, it may be time to examine your actions. Here are six signs of codependent behavior and how to break the cycle.

Six Early Signs of Codependent Behavior

1. Caretaking

Caretaking is a widespread codependent behavior. In fact, it’s pretty much synonymous with the entire issue! This is the state where you believe you must constantly take care of everyone all the time. Research indicates this is often a result of childhood parentification, where kids must grow up too quickly to take care of siblings or their parents.

If that description applies to you, you’ll feel like things won’t go well if you don’t take care of those around you. You constantly try to be the “mom friend” or ensure everyone else’s comfort above yours. You worry that, by voicing your needs, you’ll harm the comfort of others, so you stay silent. But this only builds resentment and leads to negative relationships in the long run!

2. Lack Of Boundaries

The key hallmark of codependent behavior is a notable lack of boundaries. It’s in the term itself: “codependency,” indicating an unhealthy dependency on someone else who is also dependent on you in a similar way. This lack of boundaries may appear in the following ways:

· Failure To Enforce Limits

You may have attempted to set certain boundaries before. You might have even promised yourself that you won’t be accepting specific treatment anymore. But then, when your limits are crossed, you stay silent and let it happen. You continue to allow these actions, causing your tolerance of them to slowly but surely increase to devastating levels.

· Self-Sacrifice

You constantly give to others at your expense. Your life revolves around others, and you give up time, money, effort, and energy for the people around you. This can even center on just one person, and if so, you’ll jeopardize all other relationships you have for them. You’ll even ruin your career, passions, and goals for their sake. You end up in this martyr position and can’t say no.

· Overstepping

It’s not just about your boundaries. You fail to recognize the typical limitations of others, too. In your attempts to care for them, you constantly overstep. You border on controlling, trying to fix other people and their problems by force and without empathy. When people don’t do as you want them to, you get frustrated and upset.

3. One-Sided Relationships

Codependent relationships are typically highly one-sided. They involve a dynamic where:

One individual is the “responsible” one, acting as a caretaker and martyr.
The other individual is highly irresponsible and performs multiple harmful behaviors.
The “responsible” individual excuses or enables the behavior of the inconsistent individual.
The irresponsible individual can continually perform their harmful behavior because the “responsible” individual takes care of them.

This negative relationship causes a lot of strain on the “responsible” codependent. A lot of people find themselves in that so-called responsible position. In reality, of course, it isn’t responsible, but an unhealthy and toxic bond where you feel responsible for the actions of others.

4. Avoidance of Personal Emotion

Codependent behavior involves a refusal to focus on yourself. You rely on others and focus only on providing for the people around you to a dangerous and harmful level. This means you’ll often avoid your emotions so you can better focus on the feelings of those around you. Instead of processing your feelings, you perform and experience the following:

· Repression

You’re afraid to be yourself and express your feelings. But those emotions build up whether you want them to or not. And since you’re not willing to voice them, you opt to push them back down instead. You bottle things up and may even seem very happy to those around you. But, deep down, those repressed issues only build up over time and influence your happiness and behaviors.

· Guilt

Whenever you feel strong emotions, you also feel guilty for having them. You feel as though you don’t deserve to experience your emotions. That guilt forces further suppression, making you chastise yourself for having those feelings.

· Denial

Codependent behavior doesn’t make you unintelligent. You’ll likely notice and be aware of various emotions and problems in your life. You may recognize the gravity of multiple situations and how they affect you. But because you want to avoid experiencing that truth, you put yourself in denial about them. You lie to yourself, ignore your issues, and distract yourself from reality, insisting everything is fine.

5. Lack of Trust

Codependent behavior can involve a notable lack of trust in others. You may constantly feel that others are unable to take care of themselves. As such, you become controlling and obsessive over them to save them from themselves. You may also not trust the people who have been good to you because you don’t believe yourself deserving of them. This can also manifest in the following ways:

· You Don’t Trust Yourself

You constantly second-guess your decisions and thoughts. You need other people to validate your choices. Alternatively, you never do anything that you think about doing. You don’t think you’re capable of pulling it off, or you think you can’t do it.

· You Trust The Wrong People

There are some people you trust – but they always seem to end up betraying that faith. You start to wonder if you’re just not worthy of good treatment. In reality, however, you’re subconsciously attracted to people based on your codependency and choose the wrong individuals to trust.

· You’ve Lost Previous Faiths

The people you trusted before have now entirely lost your trust. Sometimes that’s for a good reason, but if it’s fueled by codependency, it might not be. If you were previously religious, you might have lost that faith, too, believing that your god has forsaken you.

6. Lack Of Communication

A healthy relationship involves positive communication. But most codependent behaviors entirely get in the way of that. When you’re codependent, you lack an understanding of your own needs. And if you do know what your needs are, you likely feel uncomfortable or reluctant in expressing them.

This is because there’s a good chance that you believe that your only job is to take care of those around you. You don’t want to assert yourself by stating what you think and feel. You may even communicate with dishonesty, insisting you’re happy and okay when you’re not.

How To Break The Cycle of Codependent Behavior

Now that you see you are trapped in this cycle, here are some ways to help you break free.

1. Improve Self-Esteem

Codependency can’t take root when you have a high, positive sense of self-esteem. Many codependent behaviors stem from a desire to seek validation due to an innate belief that something’s wrong with you. You may:

Try to prove your worth to others, which is why your boundaries are nonexistent, and you keep overextending yourself.
Act as a caretaker to others so that you can feel of use to the people around you, as you define yourself by your service to others.
Ignore your own needs because you don’t think your desires and preferences are valid since you don’t believe in your worth.

To break the cycle of such codependent behavior, you need to start thinking about yourself. Take things slow and treat yourself with compassion as you validate your emotions. Take steps towards self-care and telling yourself that you deserve good things in life. You have to internalize the message that your worth doesn’t depend on your service to others.

2. Detach Healthily

Avoidance is unhealthy, true! But there’s a difference between avoidance and detachment. Healthy detachment is the art of letting go. It’s something that a lot of codependent individuals struggle with. You attach so much to your actions and how people perceive you that it’s tough to live an everyday life without that influence.

It’s essential to understand how detaching isn’t a selfish action. It’s something that ensures your boundaries are kept and met. It separates you from other people in a way that facilitates healthier relationships, giving you room for yourself. Detachment may involve:

No longer reacting to those around you, instead of staying calm in the face of stressors.
Disengaging from drama and arguments.
Setting healthy boundaries and enforcing them.
Refusing to enable the negative behaviors of others.
Ceasing criticizing and nagging activities.
Considering the emotions and needs of yourself.
Leaving any situations that you’re not comfortable being a part of.
Listening to others instead of trying to fix or solve their issues.

3. Learn About Yourself

Codependency causes you to struggle to have your own identity. You define yourself by your value and use to others. That’s why a big step in breaking the cycle of codependent behavior is all about learning your own true identity. You have to reconnect yourself after a long time of forcefully turning yourself into whoever you think others want you to be.

You may have lost touch with your goals, dreams, and beliefs, along with your identity. This likely makes it even harder to stop the codependency, as you have nothing to fall back on. Don’t worry – you can take it slow! Begin by asking yourself a few questions, such as:

What are my hobbies? What do I like doing?
How can I improve my mood? How can I make myself feel better?
Who are the people I enjoy spending time with most?
What are my goals and dreams in life? Is there something I want to do?

Final Thoughts On Some Behaviors Of Codependency And How To Break The Cycle

Codependent behavior is a highly harmful form of attachment. It’ll jeopardize your life and subject you to repeated harm while preventing others from taking their accountability. To escape its clutches, you have to break the cycle. Don’t be afraid to seek professional help for this frightening and challenging process!

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