Change is inevitable in life. As soon as you get used to cold temperatures and snow, the flowers begin to bloom, and the warm air fills the atmosphere. Even nature knows that things are constantly evolving, but why are so many people resisting change in life?
If you listened in science class, you might recall the fantastic journey of the caterpillar to become a butterfly. They go through many stages to evolve into something beautiful. There’s a point during the metamorphosis process where the caterpillar completely digests itself, and it appears their life is over, according to Scientific American.
However, while things may seem a little grim when the pupa liquifies, this must happen to complete the process. Now, put that into terms of your life. Have you felt that you’ve been beaten up by living, shaken to your core, and you’ve nothing left to give?
There may be many times you feel that you want to “throw in the towel.” However, it’s during these times of uncertainty that the Universe is molding and shaping you for something bigger, better, and more beautiful than you can imagine.
Change Is Scary
Change is never easy, and it can be downright scary at times. Take, for instance, getting offered a new job and moving halfway across the country. It can be a significant feat to leave family and friends in search of a unique opportunity. However, what you can’t see is there will be new friends, more things to do, and a whole new you will emerge.
However, some people are just resistant to change, almost to the point that any change is upsetting their entire schedule. Did you know that children thrive on habits? Ask any pediatrician, and they will tell you that kids do better when established on a routine.
If you get their bedtime off even by a half-hour, it can cause them to have a major meltdown. It’s also an issue for adults. You become accustomed to waking up at 6 am to be at work by 8 am.
When you oversleep by even 15 minutes, it throws your whole day off. Resisting change is common, and it’s even expected. You may be excited at the opportunity to buy a new home and move to a bigger space, but when it comes down to the actual task of moving, you become reluctant.
Deep down, you know that you made the right decision, but you’re so scared of the unknown. Your mind will play tricks on you in this process too. You will find everything you look at as undesirable in the new home.
You may point out a light switch that feels loose, a room that’s warmer than others, or a wall that has imperfections from shoddy drywall work. However, it’s your brain’s way of justifying your feelings. The good news is that soon those imperfections won’t be noticeable, and the house will feel like your home.
However, when you’re going through this type of metamorphosis in life, things look grim.
Ten Ways To Stop Resisting Change
The good news is that you’re not alone in how you feel, as these are common feelings. Now how do you stop resisting change and embrace the newness that life brings?
Since you can’t stop it, you might as well learn practical coping tools to embrace the opportunities you’ve been given. Here are some ways to help you accomplish this goal.
1. Find Your Inner Strength
Everyone has an inner strength and help that they call on in times of trouble. Turning to your faith can be beneficial when your life is changing. You don’t have to be sad and downtrodden.
You can use tools like meditation, prayers, and yoga to help get you into a better mind space and stop resisting the inevitable.
2. Be More Open and Flexible
As you age, you learn that being flexible sure makes life a lot easier. The more you resist, the more difficult it will be for you. Now, you should know that gaining flexibility will not happen overnight, but you can slowly start to open and extend beyond your comfort zone.
Though it is hard, try ordering something new at your favorite restaurant. Sure, you’ve got manicotti for twenty years when you go to this Italian eatery, but why not change it up and get some lasagna? Start incorporating small changes like this into your life so that you’re not resistant to the bigger things.
3. Discover What You’re Resisting
Identify what about the change is making you so hesitant. For instance, if you’re moving to a new town, write down the parts that cause your apprehension.
If the resistance is coming from not having any friends, you should brainstorm ways to mingle when you get to the new city. Being proactive about your opposition can help you to work through it.
4. Recognize Your Actual Fears
What are you scared of? If you’re buying a new house, is it out of your comfort zone financially? Sure, you can afford it, or the bank wouldn’t give you the loan, but you need identify the concern. When you face your fears, you desensitize them.
Exposure therapy is a tool that therapists often use for people who have phobias. According to the National Library of Medicine, when the condition is anxiety-based, this type of therapy is very effective.
5. Change Your Mindset
Did you know that you have the power to change your mindset? Every time negative thoughts pop into your head about change, you can counter them with something positive. So, if you’re mind starts wandering and you’re thinking, “There’s no way I will be happy in a new city with no one I know,” why not counter it with “There’s going to be so many new and exciting people to meet.”
By changing your thought processes, you can alter your perceptions. Eventually, your brain will automatically start thinking about all the good things rather than dwelling on the negative.
6. Consider the Upsides
Why do people always look at all the negative things about any change? It would help if you considered the upsides. For instance, if you’re changing jobs, why not think about all the money you will make rather than the coworkers you’ll lose? Again, it’s about changing the brain and altering your perceptions to comfort yourself.
7. Talk to a Therapist
A therapist is a person who can help you get through tough times. They can help you uncover why you’re resisting change and give you ways to overcome your fears.
8. Accept Your Resistance
Maybe you need to embrace that resistance to change is expected. Your feelings are normal, and you’re not thinking anything that no one else would in your shoes. Embrace the things that make you fearful, but learn how to have power over your negative thoughts.
9. Switch Perspectives and Identify and See Why Change Is Good
Have you ever heard of someone “playing Devil’s advocate?” Look at the other side of the situation rather than seeing things from only your perspective. How would your parents, friends, or other family members see this change in your life?