Weekly tips, affirmations, and small actions to feel your best.

4 Reasons Never to Give Up On Yourself

Have you ever been in a situation where you felt close to quitting an endeavor? Maybe you’re at a point in your life now where things feel hopeless and pointless, and you’re just ready to throw in the towel. Well, we’re here to give you some encouragement, and science-backed facts, about why you should keep going. Always. Here are four reasons never to give up on yourself.

1.    You Have Control

You are the only person who can make decisions in your life. It is your choice how you act, how you respond to different circumstances, and what your paradigm is. Yes, there are things outside of your control, and many people who want to give up on themselves focus a lot on those things. But there are also plenty of things that you can be the boss of.

Concentrating on the control that you do have can empower you to continue. Why give up when you can make things work with that power you hold? Here are some ways that you have control:

·         All Problems Have Solutions

give upThis fact is simple: no matter what problem you face in life, there is a solution to it. You have to find it. This means that it is up to you whether you seek a solution or allow the problem to win, as regardless of a problem’s difficulty, the answer does exist out there somewhere. Better yet, there are often many different potential solutions, giving you more control over which one you can choose. Try brainstorming, seeking outside opinions, and exploring multiple options, and you’ll find that you have a lot of control over how your problems play out.

·         Your Reality Is Yours To Dictate

The way you experience your life and how you view it is entirely up to you. Only you have full say over your perception, and you get to decide how you respond to all sorts of different situations, no matter how negative or positive they are. This means it’s up to you if what you’re experiencing is an unfair struggle or a chance to learn, or if it’s a sign that it’s time to give up or a call to action and an attractive challenge. Harness that power to change your reality and boost your positive thinking!

·         You Already Have Everything You Need

You are strong and powerful. You’re capable of doing a great many things. You have tremendous strengths and surprising talents, and you already come with everything necessary to go far in life and succeed. You’re unique, and that combination that makes up who you are provides you with the required tools. Don’t forget that all those positive parts of you and all your strengths can prove themselves useful in all sorts of situations.

2.    There Is Something Waiting For You

You may want to give up because you feel that there is nothing out there for you, but that’s false. The reality is that there are things that wait in the future of your journey that you would love to see, and those things would be a huge pity to miss out on if you give up! Some things are waiting for you.

·         Purpose

Don’t feel discouraged if you haven’t found a sense of purpose yet. Having a sense of purpose is a highly positive force in your life, improving your physical and mental wellbeing. But many people take time to get there, and they find it along the way on their long journeys to success. That could be true for you, too! Plus, purpose can be very varied and look like a lot of different things. Someone’s goal can be as lofty as being a renowned philanthropist or as simple as having a family and loved ones surrounding them. You’ll find out what yours is – but you have to keep going first!

·         Success

Here’s the truth: success is waiting for those who work smart and don’t give up. It is a certainty in those who play their cards right. How can you play your cards right? By not giving up, which will give you more opportunities to learn how to be savvy as you work towards success. In other words, the act of not giving up is already your first step towards almost inevitable success.

·         What You Deserve

You deserve to be happy and to achieve your goals. You deserve to learn more about yourself and discover what matters most to you. And you also deserve not to give up on yourself. Don’t let yourself down – keep pushing forward so you can reach the things that are rightfully yours!

michael jordan3.    Failure Is Important

Giving up can often occur when you think you’ve failed, as you feel discouraged and unmotivated by the perceived failure. But what you don’t realize is that this failure is instrumental to your future successes. This is because:

·         Failure Gets You Used To Discomfort

The easier people have their lives, the less likely they are to handle impending failures and issues. Think about it: who’s more likely to have a robust and keep-going response to challenges – someone who’s already been through and bested their past hurdles, or someone who’s never had to work a hard day in their life? When you fail, you become more used to the feelings that come with it. You get accustomed to the concept of being uncomfortable or picking yourself up after a failure. And, in turn, this means you’re more comfortable taking risks and expanding your horizons beyond your initial comfort zone – and that helps to increase your chances of success!

·         Failure Teaches Lessons

When you fail, you get the opportunity to learn from the mistakes that led to those failures. You can reflect on what happened, find its root causes, address those root causes, and work on ways to avoid similar events in the future. The next time you face a similar challenge, you’ll be armed and prepared with the knowledge from the failures you’ve had before, increasing your chances of success each time.

·         Failure Increases Your Resilience

Resilience refers to mental fortitude and strength, often of an emotional kind. It means having the ability to pick yourself back up and bounce back from difficult, painful, or harmful scenarios. When you’re not used to failure, every single mistake hurts. But the more you get used to it, the stronger you’ll be, and the less likely you are to want to give up. It can be an uphill battle at first as you build resilience, but this trait is crucial to positive wellbeing and can be instrumental in your success.

·         Failure Lets You Re-evaluate

Sometimes, being so forward-driven can mean you don’t have the time to stop and think about your approach or if your goals have changed. When you fail, you’re hitting a red light that tells you, “hey, it’s time to pause and reflect on this.” Failure gives you a reason to pause and take a good, long look at yourself. Is this the path you want to be on? Has your approach been flawed? Are there things you’ve been ignoring that need more attention, or are there things you’ve focused too much on? Do your priorities remain the same? Use failure to be productive, and you won’t want to give up anymore!

4.    You’re Almost There

One of the biggest problems with giving up on yourself is that it’s a huge, colossal waste. You’ve worked so hard and for so long, and you’re going to throw it all away. If that thought already makes you have less positive thinking towards the idea of giving up, then consider this – you could be almost there and then lose it all due to giving up. Here are some thoughts to keep in mind along this vein:

·         You Can Never Tell How Close You Are To Success

There is something especially sad about giving up right before you would have found success or the desired breakthrough. And you never know – that sad thing could be happening right now to you. You could be so close, and you’d have no idea until you get there.

Do you want to risk that?

·         You May Be Past The Point Of No Return

There comes the point in your journey where you’ve made enough commitments that you can’t simply turn around and go back on them – but ironically, this is where many people cut and run. The pressure heightens, and things can feel overwhelming, so people sacrifice everything they’ve done to throw in the towel and escape to a safe zone that is now no longer reliable. It’s a shame, and you’ll be much worse off if you go back on yourself than if you see things through and then fail.

·         Assuming You Are Always Almost There Can Keep You Going

An “almost there” mentality can fill you with positive thinking and help keep you moving forward. It’s a great source of intrinsic motivation, which studies are reasonably clear is the most positive way to develop a healthy sense of self-determination. It makes you want to seek success for your sake, not for any external factors. When balanced well with the ability to congratulate yourself on progress and the achievement of milestones and goals, and “almost there” way of thinking fuels your drive forward in powerful ways.

·         You Truly Are Always Almost There

People often assume that success will be a massive transformation, so they tend to give up on themselves when they don’t see that significant change in their lives. But that’s not the case at all. That significant change is happening all the time. Every step you take towards your personal goals, you’re actively participating in that evolution. Don’t forget that you’re always almost there because you’re continuously improving and moving towards your new goals and achievements. The transformation happens all the time!

As a disclaimer, remember that being “almost there” doesn’t mean you have to work yourself to the bone. There is a difference between giving up and simply taking a rest to recharge. There is no shame in needing to rest even if you genuinely are almost there. A little break to focus on self-care can be the best thing you can do for yourself to push yourself through the finish line.

giving upFinal Thoughts On Some Reasons Why You Should Never Give Up On Yourself

Giving up on yourself is never the answer. It’s okay to take breaks, but remember that you have the power to move forward, learn from failures, claim what lies ahead, and finally reach your goals!

If You Dream About Death Often, This Is What It Means

Nobody wants to think about death, especially their own. It’s even more disturbing if you dream about dying. Perhaps it’s one of the most prominent night vision themes.

Are dreams about death an ominous warning of doom, or could they be a bit of overnight indigestion? Is the Universe trying to bring you to terms with mortality? Whether you have visions of yourself or your loved one passing away, it can cause severe stress and sleepless nights.

Fascination with dreaming is as old as humankind. Everybody dreams, whether they remember them or not, shares an article published by the Sleep Foundation. The report says that most people dream about two hours every night, which can happen in any sleep state.

However, when you go into the most profound sleep state, called REM, your dreams can be more vivid and memorable. If you are experiencing troublesome dreams about death, you probably have them during REM state. Your brain activities are more active, and nightmares tend to be more bizarre.

On the other hand, when you dream during lighter sleep states, they’re more apt to be about everyday happenings. These surface dreams are often the ones you probably forget. REM dreams often have recurring themes that can be puzzling or even frightening.

About Those Dreams

breathe darling memeWhat is your dream style? Some people dream in black and white, like a noir film, while others see bright colors. Even people born blind have dreams, although theirs are grounded in their sense of sound, smell, and touch.

According to an article published by the Review of Neurosciences, dreaming serves many purposes. They can contribute to brain maturation and learning, giving you a deeper glimpse into your subconscious. Unfortunately, many of your dreams are the results of wishful thinking.

Since dreaming is firmly rooted in the human condition, it has constants for everyone. First, when you dream, you are always the first-person observer. Secondly, your dreams will be framed in a setting, not just floating in blank space.

So, this article concludes that an integral reason for human dreams may be to develop your sense of identity. As the omnipresent observer in your dreams, you learn at an early age that you are separate from your surroundings.

Two Universal Dream Themes

Talk to anyone worldwide, and you’ll find they share the same themes in their dreams as you do. The background may be a little different, but the themes are consistent. Often, a dream may reoccur during times of stress or indecision with these themes.

1 – Lost, Naked, and Afraid

How many times have you dreamed that you were back in high school and forgot where your class was? Maybe you see yourself walking into a crowded room and notice to your horror, that you’re stark naked. Some people may attribute these universal themes as a subtle indication that you feel self-conscious.

When you have those dreams, they probably don’t bother you much. You understand that they are familiar and harmless. Nevertheless, most people experience these themes periodically for the rest of their lives.

2 – I’ve Fallen, and I Can’t Wake Up

Another common dream theme is falling down an endless flight of stairs or through a bottomless abyss. When you dream of falling, you may awaken slightly panicked. You might feel your body slightly jerk as if you are trying to catch yourself.

Falling dreams are often scary because of your body’s reflexes and because they have been historically viewed as a bad omen. Many cultures believe that it predicts your premature death if you dream of falling and hitting the ground.

While some people may have passed away after having such dreams, it’s merely a coincidence. Your brain often uses falling as a symbol of you feeling frustrated or helpless in a situation. When you fix the problem, you may notice that your falling dreams have gone.

The Darker Side of Dreams

Since you are asleep and your brain can’t chat with you, it uses symbols in your dreams. For example, you may be hoping for a job promotion, so you may dream about flying effortlessly through the sky. Sometimes, you may have strange night visions representing inner conflict or other challenges.

However, sometimes your dreams take a more sinister approach, at least it seems to you. These dark dreams are alarming, especially when they reoccur in the same way. Here are the two most notorious ones:

dream about death1 – The Phantom Chaser

Does this scenario sound familiar to you? You are in a deep slumber when you suddenly see yourself running for your life. You don’t know who or why someone or something is chasing you in this dream.

The setting is usually dark, in an open field, or down a lonely road. It feels like you are moving in slow motion, and you try to scream but can’t. It’s like a scene in a bad horror movie.

Your body is pumped with adrenaline, and the fear is natural. Fortunately, your brain is equipped with a mechanism that keeps you from running in your sleep and getting injured. Nevertheless, when you awaken, you feel shaken and wonder about the dream’s meaning.

The good news is that having an unknown pursuer is just a brain symbol. It can usually mean that you are running away from an important decision. On the other hand, others may interpret it as some past wrongs that must be rectified.

2 – Dreaming of Dying

Perhaps one of the scariest themes is when you dream about death. Although you have friends, family, and beloved pets deceased, your mind still can’t grasp the end. Instead, your brain protects you from this fear with a false sense of immortality.

If you dream about death, you may consider it more of a nightmare than a dream. As with the falling theme, death dreams have always been linked with evil premonitions. History abounds with stories about people who foretold someone’s demise or their death while being in a dream state.

Again, such tales are coincidental and aren’t based on reality. However, it’s a morbid theme, and understandably, it would upset you. Who wants to see themselves or someone else die in their dreams?

3 – Are You Going to Die?

Of course, you’re mortal and will eventually have your appointment with death. However, if you chronically worry and stress about dying, you’re missing the beauty of life in the present. Yes, a dream about death is unpleasant, but it’s not a premonition.

Having a dream about death doesn’t always mean a physical end. Instead, it is usually symbolic of your current situation in life. When you think about these situations, you can better understand your dream’s message.

4 – Dreams about Funerals

If you dream that you are attending a funeral, your mind is signaling the end of something. Maybe there are some things in your life that you need to lay to rest, like bitterness. If you’re attending a friend or loved one’s funeral in the dream, perhaps it’s time to bury your differences.

5 – Dreams about A Dead Body

It’s gruesome at best, but you may envision a dead body when you dream about dying. However, what you see isn’t a natural body but a representation of loss in your life. Losing your job or a broken relationship is like death; your brain may use that figuratively.

6 – Walking through a Cemetery

A dream about death can also be set in a cemetery, a place of eternal rest for the dead. It is usually a dark and stormy night in your dream. Perhaps you will unwillingly see your tombstone, as Dickenson’s classic Scrooge did.

All these creepy elements are enough to turn your dream into a nightmare. So, does this death dream act as a warning that you’ll soon be a resident of the city of the dead? Once again, your brain uses dark symbols to bring things to light.

What are you harboring in your mind that you must bring into the open? Maybe there are some past traumas or mistakes that need to stay buried. On the other hand, your dreams may encourage you to leave the graves and return to the living where you belong.

7 – Dreams about a Violent Death

Dreams about being murdered are so traumatic that they would be classified as nightmares. However, you can learn much about your subconscious, even from these horrific dreams. For example, if you are experiencing a sudden change or being forced upon you, your brain may symbolize that someone is “killing” your comfort level.

If you chronically dream about death, it can eventually cause anxiety and depression. You may also lose sleep because you don’t want to have these repeated visions. Talk to a mental health professional or your primary healthcare provider for referrals.

dream about deathFinal Thoughts On Dreaming about Death

Dreams and their universal themes have intrigued humans since the beginning. If you dream of death, you can learn about your life through your brain’s symbols. They are often imagery of changes in your life and new experiences that are in your future.

5 Reasons Why You’re Indecisive (And 5 Ways to Reverse It)

Life is all about making decisions. From choosing what to eat to deciding on life-changing opportunities, each day is filled with options that you must pick between. If you have trouble with being indecisive, it can clog your life with unnecessarily wasted time.

Indecision is a common problem that many face, and it’s a complex topic with many potential causes and solutions. Here are five reasons why you’re indecisive and ways to reverse that in 5 methods.

5 Reasons Why You’re Indecisive

Do any of these traits sound like you?

1.    You’re A Perfectionist

indecisivePeople may tout perfectionism as a positive thing, but its drawbacks can be easily seen within the term itself. Indeed, it’s the act of seeking perfection, something that is inherently impossible. There’s no way to make everything perfect all the time because nothing is perfect, and that’s part of what makes life interesting.

Studies have found that perfectionism is linked to indecisiveness. This is because:

  • Perfectionism can often mean fear of not getting the best outcome, making it hard to make decisions when even a slightly less favorable result would be condemned as imperfect.
  • Perfectionism can stem from childhood upbringing; if you were in an environment where being right was more important than learning and growing, your desire to be right can muddle decision-making with an obsession with getting it right.
  • Many decisions involve unknown elements, and perfectionists like to analyze every bit of knowledge to make the best decision, even when that knowledge isn’t available.

2.    You Are Afraid

Fear is a powerful motivator. Being afraid can make someone act out of character, show their true colors after years of hiding, or trap someone in a stagnant, frozen state – that’s how powerful it can be. And being frozen in fear is a quick way to become too frightened to decide anything. You might be afraid that:

  • You’ll make the wrong decision
  • You will lose valuable safety nets
  • You’ll have to deal with change and adjustments
  • You won’t be able to know what’s coming next
  • You’ll suffer as a result of your choices
  • You’re not good enough for your decisions

These kinds of fears quickly prevent you from solidifying a choice. The consequences for that choice are ones you may not ever want to face. Worse still, this can result in you making no decisions at all and winding up in an even worse situation than if you’d just picked anything at all.

3.    You’ve Lost Sight Of Your Goals

Big decisions are all about choosing which ones best align with your personal goals. When you’ve lost sight of where you’re heading in life, it’s easy for choices to become harder to make. You don’t feel the pull of your passions and drive as strongly, so you’re crippled as to what would best help you.

On top of that, the act of overthinking and anxiety can drive you even further away from properly keeping your goals in mind. You don’t know what you want any more, and you slip into uncertainty as the things you’re aiming for don’t make sense to you at the time. Without a clear guiding light, you don’t know where your desires to point, which can contribute to decision-making difficulty.

4.    You Have A Scarcity Mentality

A scarcity mentality refers to the concept of believing that there is a limited, or scarce, amount of resources in the world. This thinking doesn’t refer to more significant big-picture crises where resources are limited. However – it relates to the idea that there is only a certain amount of success that can happen to humanity, and if you miss out, other people will claim those remaining spaces.

The concept exists in many forms, but the ways it may be affecting your decision making include:

  • Causing a belief that every decision must involve a close look at every minute detail necessitates full evaluation to a microscopic level of every aspect of these decisions.
  • Altering psychological, neural processing at a subconscious level, leading you to make decisions based on the fear of losing out (according to research).
  • Freezing you amid complex calculations into the future, involving outcomes you cannot possibly accurately guess or know.
  • Believing that others are your competition, causing you to factor their thoughts and personal path into your decision-making.

5.    You Want To Please Everyone

It’s okay to enjoy making others happy. But at the end of the day, you can’t be responsible for others, nor can you successfully please everyone in your life. Some of the decisions you make will face disagreement and discord, and you’ll have to make choices against the wishes of the people around you.

If you’re trying to please everyone and gain everyone’s validation and approval, it’s pretty apparent that indecision will follow. You emphasize the desires of others instead of your own. While it’s good to listen to other perspectives and accommodate some people in certain circumstances, decisions regarding your life have to be influenced primarily by you.

breathe darling meme5 Ways To Reverse Being Indecisive

Are you ready to become more firm in your decisions? Take a look at this advice.

1.    Ask Who You’re Aiming To Please

It’s true that sometimes, you have to make decisions while taking into account certain other people. That can make choices more difficult, especially if it’s reasonable to include them. But if you’re indecisive by nature, the chances are that you tend to try to please too many people at once.

So ask yourself: who are you trying to please with your decisions? And should you care about their thoughts on your choices? For example, are you:

  • Trying to prove yourself to someone who isn’t worth the effort or the wasted decision?
  • Aiming to please everyone around you, including people with opposite opinions on the matter?
  • One of the people you include in your considerations people whose opinions shouldn’t have a say in your choices?
  • Someone who you’re trying to please known for being a perfectionist or demanding the impossible?

Consider if you’re allowing yourself to try and please too many people. It might be time to let some of them down gently. Remember, when you’re making decisions about your personal life, only your say matters in the end. It’s your responsibility to make choices and deal with the consequences, so why should anyone else get a say?

2.    Think Well Of Yourself

Many indecisive people are also insecure or have low self-esteem, which leads to:

  • Fear of being unable to make the right decision or a lack of trust in their capabilities to handle any possible consequences.
  • Thinking you’re not worthy enough for certain decisions and outcomes that could otherwise positively affect your life.
  • Acts of seeking validation from others by making decisions that will please, accommodate, impress, or receive attention or praise.

This is why positive thinking when you consider yourself is so important. Being aware of your strengths allows you to feel more confident in making decisions, as you know what you’re capable of and are more assured in your thought processes. Cultivate healthy self-esteem by listing and appreciating your strengths and feeling validated intrinsically.

3.    Understand The Broadness Of The Decision

There’s a broad spectrum of different choices, with varying severities, degrees of urgency, and degrees of importance. Fully comprehending where a decision lies on that spectrum will allow you to respond appropriately instead of rushing an extensive choice or overthinking a small matter. Here are some questions to consider:

·         What Matters Most In This Choice’s Outcome?

What do you want to come out of the choice that you’re making? Do you want personal happiness? Do you want to keep the peace? Are you looking for practical answers that may not be the most interesting but are essential for more profound reasons? Focusing on what is essential can allow you to hone in on the exact details required to make your decision.

·         How Far-Reaching Is The Choice?

How will this decision affect you in the future? And how will it affect you in ten days? How about in ten months? How about in ten years? Something that will have semi-permanent effects on you is likely to be worthy of more consideration than something that won’t matter anymore in a week. You will feel less indecisive once you put this into perspective.

·         Can The Choice Be Reversed?

Once you make this decision, can you go back on it? Will you be able to wing it if you see that things aren’t going to plan? If it is changeable, what will the effects of change be? A decision with long-term, unchangeable results requires more careful thought than something you can go back on.

4.    Visualize The Outcomes

If you’re having trouble deciding what to do, it can be helpful to try imagining the possible outcomes. Consider trying these actions why you feel indecisive:

  • What is the best-case scenario for each choice? Imagine them.
  • What’s the worst-case scenario for each choice? How will you handle those scenarios? Imagine yourself handling them.
  • What is your goal outcome? Imagine it. Which of the envisioned scenarios fits best, and which one are you more ready to handle adverse effects of?

Creative visualization can help you to make decisions by giving you a projection of yourself at your best. The goal is to visualize a good outcome with positive thinking or imagine yourself capably handling negative ones. You’ll feel more confident in your choices after this, and the visualization may help you realize what’s important.

5.    Forgive Past Bad Decisions

Holding onto past bad decisions can cripple you when you need to make new ones. The mistakes of your past may haunt you and cause you to second-guess regularly, which ironically may lead to more flawed decisions that generate more failure.

Forgive yourself for the bad decisions you’ve made, and then practice validating your new choices. Remember the times that you have successfully chosen well, and remember how you overcame terrible choices, too.

indecisiveFinal Thoughts On Why You’re Indecisive And How To Reverse That

It’s okay to take your time to choose between different options in your life, but not every decision is worthy of rumination. Suppose your indecisive tendencies are beginning to mess with you in earnest, time-consuming, or even problem-causing ways. In that case, it’s time to learn to step back and make decisions with a more transparent and more efficient mindset.

Why People Lose Relationships Even When Their Partner Loves Them

Love is complicated, and sometimes it isn’t enough to make people stay together. You can love someone with all your heart, but it doesn’t mean that it’s they’re the right person for you or the situation is ideal. You can lose relationships even when you both love each other very much.

What if the one you love isn’t there anymore by your side? When you first became a couple, you were inseparable. You sent texts every chance you got, and you must have told each other how you felt at least ten times a day.

However, life and circumstances get in the way. It doesn’t mean your love has changed, but the newness of your union has worn off. There are no more random trips out of town just so you can be alone, as your work schedule doesn’t permit such things.

You Must Nourish Love

lose relationshipsYou’ve stopped sending flowers just because she’s had a bad day, or perhaps you’ve stopped giving him cards to tell him how you genuinely feel. Once you’ve been together for any time, you settle into a pattern of predictability. Why do you think so many people need to reinvent their relationships occasionally?

The issue is that you will lose your loved one if you don’t wake up and realize that having a relationship takes work. Assume you bought a plant from the nursery for your home. What would happen to that plant if you didn’t water it when it gets dry?

It wouldn’t take long before the plant would wither up and die.

The good news is that many plants can be salvaged and brought back to life even in a decaying drought. The same can be said about your relationships. Even though things may appear beyond the point of return, there is always hope if little life is left.

Top Ten Reasons Why People Lose Relationships

Do you ever wonder why people lose relationships, even when they started so sizzling hot? What causes the flame of love to fade on a couple who still has feelings for one another? Have they become drowned by the cares of life? Here are the top reasons why people drift away from one another.

1. Communication Dies

Communication is an essential part of any relationship. While you can’t wait to talk to your partner initially, you may find that it’s not so easy to talk as things go on. If you don’t converse with one another, how will you know what you’re thinking, feeling, or going through in life?

One of the biggest reasons people lose one another is that they stop communicating, which builds walls around their hearts. It also leaves the door open for speculation and their lover’s mind to go wild with why you’re no longer communicating with them.

2. Priorities Are Off Balance

People have time for what they want to do in life. In the first days of your relationship, you would stay up all night long talking on the phone or texting. Do you remember dragging into work the following day because you had little sleep from all the activities the night before?

When the newness begins to wear off, you know that sleep is more important than impressing someone who already loves you. The sad part is it’s easy to let job responsibilities, exhaustion, and other issues get in the way of your time with your lover. Remember, if he or she is a priority in your life, then you can and will make time for them.

3. Taking One Another For Granted

When’s the last time you complimented her on her beautiful hair? When did you last tell him how much you love his cologne? It’s important to say those things to one another when trying to solidify the relationship, but it’s easy not to feel the need to say such things once you capture their heart.

It doesn’t matter if you’ve been together for two months or twenty years; it’s your responsibility to make the other person feel needed and wanted. Many people lose relationships because they don’t tell their partner what they long to hear, and they find someone else who is more than eager to say such things to them.

4. Low Self-Esteem

Many times, people don’t stay together has nothing to do with anything you’re doing wrong, but the issue is that you don’t feel like you measure up. Low self-esteem may make you think you don’t meet your partner’s expectations. You may fear intimacy and want to shy away from any romance because you’re afraid you’re not good enough.

It’s important to talk about esteem issues and let the other person know what you’re feeling. They can help you discuss some of these matters and reassure you that your thoughts are not theirs.

5. Financial Troubles

When you take the step to get married or move in together, you may struggle with finances. The New York Post referenced research conducted by the Austin Institute for The Study of Family and Culture. The focus was using data from over 4,000 people who filed for divorce.

They wanted to uncover the most common reasons why marriage doesn’t always work. They found that financial issues are among the most prevalent reasons for couples to split. Whether you’re not making enough money or the other party is spending it like you’re printing it in the basement, financial problems can take a significant toll on a union.

financial habits6. Infidelity

If your partner isn’t your top priority, you’re leaving the door open for someone else to enter your heart. When you don’t communicate properly and lack the connection you once had, you’re setting yourself up for some real issues. Infidelity doesn’t mean that you don’t love the one you’re with; it simply means that there is something wrong in your relationship that you’re not addressing.

Dr. Joel Block is a psychologist at Hofstra Northwell School of Medicine, and he helped collaborate an article on their blog. He states that an affair is a mental exit strategy to a relationship that’s in trouble. After many years of counseling, he sees cheating as a sign that one party wants out.

7. Ignoring One Another’s Needs

Every person alive has needs that are emotional and physical. When you’re not meeting those needs, then it’s one way you can lose relationships. Your partner needs you to be intimate with them, as it’s one way to show love.

Additionally, they need you to hold them when they cry, be there when their world is crashing down, and support them. When you stop caring about the other person’s needs or put them ahead of theirs, it’s a recipe for disaster.

8. Commitment Issues

Love and commitment are two vastly different things. If there’s something in either one of your pasts that makes you suspicious of commitment. Indeed, it can be rough to make it long-term.

When a cheating partner hurts you or you watch your parents go through a painful divorce, it’s easy to fear commitment. However, the other party may not be willing to remain in the friend zone for long.

9. Untruthfulness

The only thing worse than someone not telling you what’s going on in their life is the person who lies about it. Have you ever been in a relationship with someone less than honest? Trust is one of the foundational building blocks of a partnership, and if you can’t trust each other, your relationship won’t last.

10. Sexual Incompatibility

Each person has a sex drive that is dictated by the hormones in their body. If one person has a higher drive than the other, it can cause some real issues. One party may desire to be together multiple times in a week, while the other person is satisfied just a couple of times a month.

It’s essential that even though you might not have the same drive for sex, you always consider the other person’s needs. You can quickly lose relationships if the person feels that their needs are going unmet.

lose relationshipsFinal Thoughts on Losing Relationships Even When You’re In Love

A famous songwriter once said that love is a battlefield, and this statement is absolute truth. Many folks don’t get into committed relationships because they know they take a lot of work to make things good. Even if you have a great partnership with your spouse, it didn’t just happen that way.

It would help if you always considered the needs of your spouse and their desires. Communicate with them and always be honest about your feelings. If finances are an issue, work through them so they don’t destroy your union.

If you don’t want to lose relationships, you must be willing to give yourself completely to someone you love.

14 Behaviors That Reveal Histrionic Personality Disorder

There are many personality disorders recognized by the mental health community, but one of the more severe is histrionic personality disorder. This disorder’s severity stems from the person’s intense and unstable emotions that make them quite unbalanced. Since this individual has a twisted self-image, they want everyone to notice them.

The very root of the word means dramatic or theatrical, so it’s easy to see why HPD is a condition where the person’s emotional stability is volatile. According to the Cleveland Clinic, females tend to have this disorder more often than males. They also state that the signs of this mental health condition are usually displayed in childhood, but it can be diagnosed early in adulthood.

Signs of Histrionic Personality Disorder

With HPD, it’s not always easy to detect because the person has keen social skills. Sadly, they use these skills to manipulate and control those around them. They desire to be the center of attention in everything they do, so they can often be confused with a narcissistic or self-centered person.

Here are some classic behaviors that indicate that a person has a histrionic personality disorder.

histrionic1. Problems Maintaining Relationships

Like the classic manipulator, they cannot maintain relationships. They use people to make them feel better and to further their agenda. Relationships with family and friends are often strained, which is why there are few, if any, in their inner circle.

2. Dress Provocatively

To get attention, their attire stands out to get them noticed. This individual will wear the most outlandish clothing just so that people can’t help but look. Their poor self-esteem is boosted when someone looks at them longingly.

3. Uncomfortable Unless All Eyes Are on Them

The person suffering from histrionic personality wants all eyes on them. If others in the room are getting more attention, they will use emotional displays to shift the focus to themselves.

4. Shifting Emotions Rapidly

Their emotions are all over the board. They can be happy and on top of the world one minute, and the next minute they’re crying and wanting to end their life. Finding a happy medium is hard for a person who needs the constant approval of others to keep themselves going.

5. Acts Dramatically

Some might call this person the king or queen of drama. They will turn the smallest infraction into a huge ordeal. Everything is over the top, and people dread interactions with them because of their outlandish behavior.

6. Uses Suicidal Attempts for Attention

The person with HPD is not against using suicidal attempts to get attention. They want people to cater to them and rally around in support. They may like the attention they get from this behavior, and they may often use this threat to get their way.

7. Seductive and Flirtatious

Their seductive nature knows no bounds. They will flirt and seduce anyone in their presence. They openly use inappropriate advances to control people, and they have no problem with one-night stands, as long-term relationships don’t often work for them.

8. Bored by Routine

While some people thrive on routine, the HPD person finds it boring. Since they don’t like a set schedule, holding down a job may be impossible. They won’t be the type of person to sit home on the weekend with nothing to do.

They will find something to get into, even if it’s significant trouble. Some might say that they run to danger like a moth to a flame.

pop quote9. Makes Rash Decisions

Sure, these individuals make rash decisions, but their brain is working in overdrive. Their impulse control problems are similar to that of a person suffering from attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, ADHD.

Remember, this person is bored often, so they will do anything for a little fun. They don’t think twice before doing something most people would think long and hard over. Making big purchases or running away for a weekend with a stranger just seems like the thing to do. Sadly, they put themselves in harm’s way too frequently.

10. Self-Centered

No one is as important to the theatrical person as themselves. They think no one can do anything quite as good as they do. While this may be the persona they portray on the outside, inside is usually a deeply wounded individual who has been traumatized by something in life.

11. Extremely Sensitive to Criticism

The HPD individual doesn’t like criticism, even if it’s meant to help. They find that anyone who calls them out on their behaviors is trying to hurt them deliberately. Due to their sensitive nature, going to therapy or getting help for their condition is challenging.

12. Very Gullible

While they tend to focus on themselves, they are very susceptible and don’t see when someone uses them. Their poor decision-making skills and rash movements often make them extremely sensitive to getting involved in sinister things. So, you might not be surprised to learn this person has a history with the law or a substance abuse problem too.

13. Starts Many Projects but Doesn’t Finish Them

Their attention span and tendency to be easily bored means that most projects they start don’t get finished. People have learned in their dealings that they can’t count on them to get the job done. This individual may start with the best of intentions, but their hyperactive brain just goes in circles.

14. Needs the Constant Reassurance and Approval of Others

Something happened in their life that destroyed their self-worth, so they desire others’ approval at all costs. They need that constant reassurance from others, even if it’s strangers, that their life is okay.

What Causes Histrionic Personalidy Disorder?

Not much is known about the origins of this mental health condition. However, the medical community believes that there are genetic links, according to an article on the National Library of Medicine. Since this disorder is often found in families, like bipolar and schizophrenia, it’s believed there are inherited components.

It’s important to note that some children who grow up with a person suffering from HPD might mimic their behaviors. They may learn that it’s socially acceptable to use people to get their way. While this is not indicative of the disorder, poor parenting and a chaotic childhood can be a factor.

Genetics is one possibility of developing this condition, but many environmental influences cannot be ignored. A child who has suffered from damaging psychological situations might use some of the behaviors of HPD as coping mechanisms.

For instance, a kid who was severely neglected by parents who didn’t have time for them may crave attention to fill the void. They can develop such a condition to ease the chaos they feel in their mind.

Treating Histrionic Personality Disorder

As with any mental illness, there is no cut and dry treatment that works for all.

The person who suffers from HPD doesn’t see the need for care as most don’t believe that they have a problem. Treatment is brutal when they don’t like routine and fight any changes.

They may be willing to accept help for specific aspects of the condition, like depression or anxiety, but they don’t consider the bigger picture. The best way to treat a person with HPD is by using psychotherapy. During treatment, the therapist tries to get to the root of their fears, which is the cause of their behaviors.

Uncovering the motivation behind these actions can be quite scary, and therefore so many are resistant to care. Cognitive-behavioral therapy helps the person suffering from HPD learn how to treat others more positively so that they can have meaningful relationships.

Since this mental health condition affects social, professional, or romantic relations, they must seek treatment to have any normality in their life. It’s not uncommon for this individual to suffer from deep depressive moods when their tactics to get attention and compensate for their negative feelings don’t work.

histrionicFinal Thoughts on Histrionic Personality Disorder

HPD falls under “Cluster B” personality disorders in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders or DSM-5. Due to the nature of personality disorders, they’re often hard to treat. Someone suffering from histrionic personality will battle this condition lifelong in most instances.

If you regularly deal with this person, you will need firm guidelines in what will be acceptable to you. It’s increasingly challenging to have any relationship with this individual, so encouraging them to seek treatment is advisable. With therapy and a healthy support system, the person with HPD can have a good, quality life.

The goal is to retrain the brain to view situations differently and get at the core issues driving these toxic behaviors. When trauma and environmental factors are to blame, processing these events can help to bring relief and ease the internal struggle. Genetic components are harder to fight, but therapy can be a useful tool to cope.

Woman Reinvents Herself With 115 Pound Weight Loss

When you have the urge to reinvent yourself, it usually stems from a strong desire for change. People go through many transformations, but weight loss is the most common life change by far. In our world of modern food choices, staying healthy and fit is a real challenge. However, with practice and consistency, it can be done.

Marissa Dawn went on this journey herself, losing 115 pounds in the process! She now works as a personal trainer and does online coaching as well. Here is her uplifting and motivating weight loss story.

“My starting weight was 260 pounds, and I was like a lot of other people,” Marissa says. In the beginning, she thought she’d missed out on many opportunities in life. She thought she was stuck forever being overweight, at a job she hated, and in a relationship that didn’t make her happy.

“Overall, I just thought my life was what it was and there was no changing it, no matter how hard that I had tried.”

However, she quickly found out that she could reinvent herself at any time; she didn’t have to settle. After beginning her weight loss journey, she documented her results on her Instagram and YouTube channel. She never imagined she’d have a fulfilling new career helping others achieve their fitness goals as well. Now, her YouTube channel has over 120K subscribers, and she’s been voted the #1 personal trainer in the San Antonio area.

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A post shared by Marissa Dawn (@70lbsoflife)

“I have gone through my very own 115-pound weight loss journey, but more importantly, I went through a major mindset shift along the way, and this is how I did it,” Marissa says. “One of the main reasons I decided to lose weight is because I realized that my body was no longer serving me.”

Marissa decided to reinvent herself to feel good in her own skin again.

She says that at 25 years old, she couldn’t walk and keep up with friends while in New York City. She had to hold her breath, experiencing chaffing on her thighs and getting quickly overheated and red in the face. Marissa felt embarrassed and uncomfortable in her own skin like she was suffocating. Feeling this way made her want to lose weight for good so she could enjoy life again.

When she returned home from her trip to New York, she went to the doctor and got diagnosed with pre-diabetes. This motivated her even more to reinvent herself and shed the excess weight she’d been carrying around. She had tried many times to lose weight in the past, but she finally found success this time thanks to fitness  gadgets like those on sale at https://www.allvibrationplates.com/vibration-plate-benefits/.

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A post shared by Marissa Dawn (@70lbsoflife)

Here are three main things that she attributes to her weight loss success:

How did she achieve this?

1. Holding herself accountable by making video diaries.

She put the video diaries on YouTube, which helped her stay accountable since other people followed her journey. They checked in with her once a week to see how much weight she had lost or what meals she’d made. They also asked her about the exercises she’d done to have inspiration for their own workouts.

2. Surprisingly, she said letting go of the idea of motivation helped her lose weight.

Instead, she focused on the process and procedures of losing weight. This way, it became part of her routine, whether she felt particularly motivated each day or not. By taking the necessary steps to reach her goal and putting feelings aside, she found it easier to maintain a routine.

3. Finally, she turned her weight loss journey into a fun experience.

Many people end up quitting the gym or whatever exercise routine they have because it’s simply grueling. However, Marissa wanted to find exercises she enjoyed to stick with the process to the end. She found that dance classes, HIIT body workouts, and lifting weights made exercise fun.

So, by holding herself accountable, sticking to the process no matter what, and making exercise fun, Marissa reached her goal. Actually, she ended up losing more weight than she ever imagined, having a whole new lease on life. By reaching her goals, she found a whole new passion and career path as well. Plus, since people had watched her lose weight, they felt even more inclined to hire her as their personal trainer.

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A post shared by Marissa Dawn (@70lbsoflife)

Marissa’s advice to anyone looking to reinvent themselves physically, mentally, and emotionally

“My biggest piece of advice for somebody who’s just getting on a weight loss journey and the same piece of advice that I give to all of my clients is to stop focusing on instant gratification,” Marissa says. “You have to be focused on the long term, so really ask yourself throughout the day, check-in with yourself, be mindful, get rid of negative self-talk. You CAN do it, you are worthy, you’re meant to be whatever you want to be in life, and it is never, ever too late for you.”

If Marissa can do it, you can too! For someone who reinvents themselves, they already know what they signed up for. They know the journey won’t be easy, but the reward waits for them at the end. Actually, the whole process itself is rewarding because every positive step gets you closer to your goal. Never give up on your dreams or yourself because you’re more capable than you think.

Final thoughts: you can reinvent yourself at any time and become whatever you want

Marissa’s story is a powerful reminder that we are not trees – we don’t have to stay stuck in life. We can move wherever and however we please and grow to become something totally different. In life, the only constant is change, so it doesn’t make sense to resist it. If we can embrace life by emboldening ourselves and realizing our inner power, we will no longer be bound by limits.

We leave you with this helpful piece of advice from Marissa’s Instagram:

“Instead of focusing on quick results, turn your focus towards just the system, aka the choices you are making. Make choices with a purpose, get the results you want. Make the same choices you have been; get the same results.

My journey started in 2016. I have been making choices with a purpose for four years now. And every year, I have gotten more and more results.”

Therapists Explain 5 Ways to Discipline Children Without Hurting Feelings

The methods to discipline children have evolved over the past two decades. Corporal punishment has been proven to be damaging to a child’s psychological well-being, and many studies have been used to validate this claim further.

One such study occurred at the Punjab University Laboratory School over six months.

The children in this study were divided into two groups. One group of children received corporal punishment, while the other was corrected using positive methods. The children with a more aggressive approach to discipline showed negative signs from their instruction. They didn’t have any desire to learn, and they had more psychological issues than the other students.

It’s easy to see that the old-fashioned philosophies of striking the child have done more harm than good. So, how does one discipline children healthily without hurting their feelings or psychological well-being?

Five Ways to Discipline Children Without Causing Further Pain

discipline childrenYou want to be a good parent, and you want your child to grow up well-rounded. You certainly don’t want to be the cause of why they’re sitting on a psychiatrist’s couch crying their eyes out about their childhood when they’re older. It’s your job as a mom or dad to guide them and provide instruction to make wise choices.

It seems like a simple task to keep your children in line, but parenting is not for the faint of heart. Did you know that many people who use corporal punishment acts are doing it to vent their frustrations in the actions rather than as an effective form of discipline? To balance this best, parents need to find positive ways to correct their children that don’t have long-term effects.

If your toddler has a temper tantrum and throws toys while screaming, does it make sense for you to yell and spank their bottom as a punishment? Essentially, you’re punishing the behavior by acting similarly. Here are five ways to discipline children without hurting their feelings or causing them more significant pain.

1. Time Out

Time out is an effective punishment that toddlers can use for teens, though the methods will vary. Children love to stay busy, and they don’t want you to interrupt them from their activities. For a toddler, having them sit in a dedicated spot where they can no longer play is the equivalent of torture.

While the action is essential, what you say during this period is even more beneficial. They must know that this is a natural consequence of their actions. You don’t want to call them names, shout, or be aggressive, but keep reminding them that they didn’t listen, so this is the result of their bad choices.

If the child is older, making them have time out in their room to think is advisable. Ensure they don’t have electronics and other devices as this is no pleasure sentence. You want them to pause and separate themselves from others for a short period to allow time to think.

The goal is to make them realize the error of their ways and give them the keys to empower them to make changes.

2. Grounding

Grounding will have little effect on a child until they’re old enough to understand the concept of loss. If you take a toy from a toddler who has 1,000 other toys, it’s not going to have an impact. However, if you take a video game system from a 15-year-old, it will send a powerful message.

Grounding is a consequence they will see as unfavorable, but it’s not psychologically damaging. Remember that if you’ve taken the game system ten times in the past month, it’s clear that this method is not practical for this child. Grounding should be from events and objects but never from things like the family dinner table, game night with their siblings, and other special events.

The goal is to never isolate the child from the family unit, where they draw their strength. You want to keep them engaged to feel isolated from their family, which can hurt their feelings and cause severe damage. No one wants to grow up feeling like an outsider, even if it’s due to their behavior.

oldest child3. Having A Heart-to-Heart Conversation

All kids are different, and what works for one will not work for another. If you have a child that needs a distinct look from you, then having a heart-to-heart may be a good form of correction. Sit the child down, look them right in the eye, and tell them why what they did was wrong.

Assume that your son climbed out his window to meet friends at midnight. You found out about it the next day from a neighbor. Your son needs to understand the severity of his actions. He could have been kidnapped, got hurt, got in trouble with the police for being out past curfew, or had many things happen.

Children don’t think about consequences, and they only live for the moment without forethought. Kids with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder are notorious for having poor impulse control, but they’re not the only ones. Your child probably counted on the fact that he wouldn’t get in trouble because he had no intentions of being caught.

They should know how much they hurt you by their actions and how scared you were for their well-being. You must never use words like dumb, stupid, brain dead, loser, moron, or an idiot. These words should be erased from your vocabulary when it comes to discipline, as they cut like a knife and can cause long-term psychological damage.

4. Use the Reward System

One way to look at discipline is to counter bad behavior by honoring good deeds. Star charts and other accomplishment trackers are seen as positive forms of direction. If you lead them in the right way, then you will do less punishing. You can stop them from engaging in destructive behavior by allowing them to see what happens when they do right.

Children under ten years of age love seeing stars by their name, and a goal is accomplished. To be honest, don’t you like getting praise from your boss when you do a good job, and doesn’t it make you want to do even better? It feels good to be praised and told you did good, so one way to discipline children is to use positive reinforcement.

Why focus on all the negative stuff anyway? The reward system makes direction fun, and you get to play the “good cop” by praising and rewarding when they’ve done what is required. Plus, it feels so good to encourage rather than punish, and it can change the whole atmosphere and relationships in your home.

5. Create Diversions and Redirect

Redirection is a technique that is seen as positive. Rather than focusing on punishing the negative actions, why not redirect them into another activity? Assume your little three-year-old daughter won’t stop fighting with your five-year-old son over a toy.

It’s a little flashlight that isn’t that great of a toy anyway, but they are continuously fighting over who has control of it. If you let them argue, they can keep up these actions for long periods. The result may be a temper tantrum, physical violence, and an uncomfortable afternoon for all involved.

However, what if you cut off their wrong actions at the pass? Go over, remove the flashlight, and direct their attention to another activity. When you take the object out of the equation and turn the focus towards something else, then you can avoid all this drama.

Parents are guilty of letting things drag on because you learn to tune things out. If you’re scrolling social media or talking on the phone, you might not catch everything. However, being proactive allows you to create a more harmonious atmosphere in your home.

discipline childrenFinal Thoughts on Methods to Discipline Children Without Hurting Them

Think back to your childhood and how you were disciplined. What things would you change, and what did you think was acceptable? Was there anything that hurt you and caused you significant psychological discomfort?

When you discipline children, the goal is to learn from your parents’ mistakes and make wise choices in your child-rearing. Now, that’s easier said than done. It never fails; you will inevitably hear your mother or father coming out of your mouth at some point.

While you can take the good things about your child-rearing to direct your kids, you need to remember that society knows much more now about the long last effects of poor discipline. You don’t want to hurt your children’s feelings, nor do you want to cause them to be aggressive towards your future grandchildren.

If your children grow up in a home where there is name-calling, hitting each other, and mind games are used as forms of punishment, then it’s going to be impossible for them to be well-rounded and not affected. Kids don’t come with a manual, and it would be great if they did. You will find that each child responds differently to correction, and some need more assertive actions than others.

Counselors Explain Why Rebound Relationships Are A Bad Idea

It’s never easy to break up with someone with whom you shared a romantic relationship. Whether it was good or bad doesn’t matter; breaking up is hard to do. However, jumping right into another relationship seems like an excellent way to get over your heartbreak, but rebound relationships are a recipe for disaster.

Many people think the best way to get over one person is to fall for another, but it’s a bad idea. Rebound relationships are real, and there are feelings involved. While you may be coming out of a breakup, the other person may be ready, willing, and able to love you in the purest sense. You, on the other hand, have a lot of healing to do.

Sure, people get married on the rebound and even go on to find their true love, but it’s not always the case when you’re trying to get over someone else. You’re a human being, and you’re going to make mistakes along life’s journey. However, you must be careful because you tend to turn a blind eye to all the toxic things in a relationship when you’re in love.

The truth is that you need time to heal and to process all that’s happened in your previous union. While it feels good to move on and validate the feelings that you still have what it takes, it’s not always a sign that you’re over your ex. They say that it takes seconds to fall in love but a lifetime to get over it, and nothing could be more accurate.

Tales of Rebound Woes

Do you know how easy it is to jump into a rebound situation? Here are some speculative stories for you to consider.

rebound relationships• The Legal Nightmare

Destiny was successful in life and love. She and her boyfriend of four years were going strong until he cheated. Destiny didn’t have the time or effort she needed to put into a relationship as a busy lawyer.

When her boyfriend dumped her for another woman, she felt betrayed, angry, and wondered what people would think. Everyone believed they were destined to be together and going to get married. Rather than taking time to heal and reflect, she jumped into a new relationship within a week with a partner at the law firm.

The relationship was messy, and it ended badly within two months. Now, she must face this guy every day, and it’s made things tense at work.

• Depressed and Vulnerable

Consider William, an auto mechanic whose wife left him after ten years of marriage. He is devastated, and they have two kids that are tangled in this situation. William is so hurt by his wife leaving him that he sinks into a deep depression.

His friends suggest he come to a club with them where he meets Danielle. They instantly have a connection and become physical. The relationship becomes friends with benefits, but the rebound situation lasts but a few weeks.

William didn’t really know much about Danielle, but she stole a bunch of money from him. She had a criminal history and a substance abuse habit. Thankfully, he got away from her before things could get any worse.

• Used to Settle The Score

Lisa was a carefree spirit that everyone loved. She had lots of friends and a boyfriend of six years. When Chris decided that he wanted to move on and try new things, Lisa became devastated.

To get back at him for leaving her, she started dating his best friend, Mark. Mark didn’t really want to be with Lisa, but he wanted to get back at his friend for a grudge he harbored from years prior. Though he treated her well, he was never emotionally available to her.

Though Lisa fell hard for Mark because of his kind and caring nature, she ended up hurt even worse when she found out he had a secret mission of revenge and used her. She would have been better off to have never even entertained a relationship with him.

Ten Reasons Why Rebound Relationships Are A Terrible Idea

If you’ve faced a breakup, you may want to reconsider jumping into a rebound situation. It would help if you had time to mend, which can take months or even years. Here are some reasons why these relationships don’t work.

1. No Time to Reflect and Heal

It would be best if you had time to reflect on what happened, process it, and grow. Every life experience gives you a chance to take inventory and purge the bad things in you. If you don’t use this opportunity to fix yourself, it could be a disaster for the next relationship.

2. You Can Be Taken Advantage Of

You’re very vulnerable after a breakup, so you need to be careful. In this vulnerable state, you can be taken advantage of, especially if you get with the wrong person. Not everyone in the dating world will have your best interests at heart.

3. It Can Be Dangerous

It’s impossible to have rational thinking when your heart has been ripped in two. Your emotions are raw, and you might find yourself in potentially dangerous situations. Many people turn to drugs and alcohol to ease their pain, and they’re just asking for an even bigger problem.

4. You’re Not on Your “A” Game

You want to give your rebound relationship the best chance possible. However, once you’ve been hurt and are trying to heal, you’re not exactly on top of the world. You’re not ready to give yourself a hundred percent to your rebound because a piece of your heart still belongs to your ex.

pop meme5. It’s A Temporary Fix

Rebounds are often a temporary fix to a long-term issue. Sure, it feels good to be desired and intimate with someone again, but it’s only going to put a band-aid on the wound. The truth is that it’s going to take time, and you’re not allowing yourself the proper amount of time when you jump back into a relationship too soon.

6. Your Reputation Is On The Line

It’s not uncommon for people to get into a string of relationships because they don’t take time to address their feelings. You certainly don’t want to have the reputation of being fickle and irrational, and if you hop from one relationship to another, this is precisely what people will think.

7. Ends Chances of Reconciliation

Many couples have an on-again, off-again type of union. If you jump into another relationship, it decreases the chances of getting back with your ex. They may see you as moved on and let it go, which might be for the better anyway.

8. They Often Don’t Last

The Modern Man referenced a study on rebound relationships and how many end in disaster. It was discovered that more than 65 percent of these relationships wouldn’t make it to the six-month mark.

9. Usually More Damaging Than Therapeutic

Rather than helping you, having a relationship with someone that isn’t right can cause further damage. Since you’re so vulnerable, you’re likely to find that this new person will only make things worse, no matter how good of a person they are in life.

10. It’s About Your Ex – Not You or Your New Love Interest

The fact is that this new relationship isn’t about you or your new love interest. Rather, this new person is all about getting back at your ex. You want to show them, yourself, and the world that you still have what it takes to get someone. It feels good to show your ex that you don’t need them to make it and that many people still find you desirable.

Getting Your Mojo Back

You’ve found out all the reasons why these rebound relationships don’t last, but you need to know how to get yourself back to a good place. Here are a few tips to help you get your mojo back and heal.

•Stop blaming the other party and take accountability for what you’ve done wrong.

•Get counseling to help you get over this breakup and move on.

•Purge the negativity from your life so that you can be more positive about your future.

•Don’t rush things. Take all the time you need to heal.

•It’s okay to see people as friends, but you should be upfront and honest with them about your situation.

•Work on your self-esteem. Try using positive affirmations to boost your ego and help you feel better about yourself.

rebound relationshipsFinal Thoughts on Rebound Relationships

One of the best sayings out there is “don’t get bitter, get better.” You must acknowledge any wrongdoing on your part in this relationship so that you can move on. There are always three sides to every story, yours, theirs, and the truth.

Breakups are torturous, but the good news is, according to The Huffington Post, it takes about four months to get over a broken heart. They say that time heals all wounds, and there is undoubtedly some truth to that adage.

Rebound relationships complicate things, and they can make matters much worse. Do yourself and others a favor and allow yourself the proper time to heal so that you’re ready to be involved with someone for all the right reasons.

Special Needs Dog Learns to Use a Wheelchair, Leads a Happy Life

Hannah, a dog with special needs, lives a full life thanks to a wheelchair and her amazing owners. She has a hereditary neurological condition called cerebellar hypoplasia. This means that since birth, her cerebellum has been underdeveloped. Since this brain area controls motor movements, it affects Hannah’s mobility.

However, since Cassidy and her partner adopted Hannah, she’s been able to live a much happier life. Hannah spent her first three years of life in shelters and foster homes. Thankfully, she finally found her forever home in November 2019.

“We discovered Hannah through a rescue online in about October 2019,” Cassidy said. “We followed her story for about a month, and after she didn’t find a home still, we decided that we were going to apply to adopt her.”

Raising Hannah

They got to bring her home the following month after she’d just turned three years old. Cassidy and her partner then started training Hannah to walk in her wheelchair.

“Once she came home to us, we began working with her on her mobility. She’s unable to walk on her own – she wobbles, and she falls over,” Cassidy explained. “She came with a wheelchair, but she had never truly learned how to use it, so we kind of started there.”

It took a while for Hannah to get used to it, but she eventually got the hang of it. Now, she can explore both inside and outside with her mom’s supervision.

“After several months of trial and error – and practice – she now is able to get around by herself with a wheelchair while she’s outside.”

Hannah’s disability doesn’t seem to get her down. Cassidy says that she’s “always happy” and “is excited when you get home.”

Special needs dogs give so much love and deserve it in return.

While she can’t come up to the door to greet them, she shows her happiness differently. Cassidy says that Hannah’s whole body shakes with excitement on the couch when they walk into the house. Hannah has a dog brother named Coda and gets along great with him! They both love one another and seem to make an incredible team.

“He’s been such a blessing for her,” Cassidy said. “He knows how to play with her. He protects her; they’re just the best of friends.”

Cassidy says that they want to spread awareness about Hannah’s condition to others. They made her an Instagram account, in part, so that they can advocate for her. However, they also love having her around and want to spread that joy to others.

Cassidy says this:

“We share Hannah on social media for several reasons. One of the first ones is that she makes us very happy, and is very much a light in our lives. We share her to share that with others. Despite the cards that she’s been dealt, she doesn’t know she’s any different. Many of the dogs that have this condition don’t get a chance in life. This is another reason why we share Hannah, just to show that these dogs are out there, and they are spectacular. They deserve loving, forever homes just as much as any other dog.”

Hannah now has over 16,000 fans on Instagram, where she receives loving, supportive comments each day. Her life wasn’t always so happy, though. She was found as a stray in San Antonio, Texas, at ten months old. She went to rescue, and then a family decided to foster her for a year. However, because of all the extra work Hannah required, they chose not to adopt her.

Hannah finally found her forever family who truly loves her.

Hannah got transferred to a Wisconsin shelter, where Cassidy and her partner saw the special needs dog. Once they heard her story, they knew they had to bring her home. Hannah had just celebrated her third birthday and got the best present ever. Now, she could get the training and support she needed not only to survive but thrive.

Hannah now lives in Nebraska with her two moms and loving brother Coda. With plenty of wide-open spaces to practice with her wheelchair, it’s the perfect place for her. Hannah still struggles to steer the wheelchair due to her condition, but she practices almost every day. Cassidy and her partner give her love and patience, which is what she’s needed all along.

Along with the right support, special needs dogs like Hannah require proper training and guidance. She goes to hydrotherapy every week to improve her strength and mobility. Hannah is making fantastic progress with it thus far. Cassidy says that the vet recommends other therapies for her condition, but they are quite expensive.

Other needs emerge

Due to the costs, Hannah does not attend the additional necessary therapies. Cassidy says they also need additional supplies to make Hannah more comfortable. Her wagon is ripping on the side Hannah leans against, and they use it to transport her.

Additionally, they have been researching the right types of gear and outerwear for Hannah in colder temperatures. Hannah’s owners want her to enjoy the outdoors year-round, but her condition makes this challenging without the right equipment. If you’d like to help support their efforts, you can do so here.

Final thoughts: special needs dog finds a loving family to adopt her

Potential adopters often overlook special needs dogs like Hannah at shelters. People may get scared about the work or money involved in caring for these dogs. However, they still deserve a loving, supportive environment as much as any other dog.

Cassidy and her partner have worked hard to ensure Hannah has everything she needs. She does require various therapies and training, but Hannah’s moms don’t consider this a burden. In fact, they consider it a blessing to be able to help out a dog in need. Plus, Hannah doesn’t let her disability affect her outlook on life.

“Happy like Hannah is the motto that we use for her and is very much fitting of her.”

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