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15 Ways to Show Admiration Without Saying a Word

April 6, 2022 by Chris Butler

How often have you heard your actions speak louder than your words? What comes out of your mouth can be sugar, spice, and everything nice, but if your body language doesn’t align with the spoken word, it’s all a waste. Many people say they love one another but don’t show admiration.

Sure, part of loving someone is telling them how you feel. However, the other part of being in a relationship is demonstrating this love. You can show admiration for someone without ever opening your mouth.

You display true feelings that don’t get lost in the translation in many ways. For instance, it’s cold and snowy outside, and a husband starts his wife’s car and scrapes all the ice from it. So when she leaves for work, her car is toasty warm and ready to go.

Did he have to go out and scrape the ice and battle the elements for her? No! However, he did it because he loved her and didn’t want her to be cold and miserable. What about the wife that takes her husband lunch because she knows he’s so busy he won’t have time for a break that day?

All of these little things can add up and help to fill the love tank, which is essential if you want to make it for the long haul.

Fifteen Ways to Show Admiration Without Speaking

These little things you do each day reiterate your verbal statements. You probably already show admiration in many ways, but here are a few more to add to your list.

1. Show Admiration by Putting Down the Cell Phone

If your partner has something they want to talk about, put down your phone! Don’t scroll through social media as they speak. They shouldn’t have to compete with an electronic device for your attention.

If you go to the movies, dinner, or out with friends, leave the phone in the car or on vibrate. There’s nothing more important than the one that stole your heart. Flirt a little bit and make them feel like a teenager again.

2. Make an Effort with Their Family and Friends

Their family and friends predate your relationship, so these people are essential to the one you love. While you won’t always see eye-to-eye with others, make a conscious effort for your partner. A top reason couples seek counseling is trouble with in-laws.

He further states in his article that parents often have a hard time letting go of their children, and most of the backlash and controlling behavior stems from this issue. Look at the situation with fresh eyes and tell them you love their child and want to love them.

3. Leave Love Notes to Express Admiration

Why not let the loved one know you still have a crush on them? Whether you’re newly dating or married for twenty years doesn’t matter. If you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, you must find ways to let them know they’re still the one.

4. Support Them

If you want to show admiration to someone you love, be there for them for all the little things in their life. If they’re being honored at a dinner for their job, then you clear your schedule to show up. They need you to support them through the big and small things, and this goes far beyond lip service and saying you love them.

5. Ask About Their Day and How They’re Doing

When you admire someone, you care about the happenings of their life. Many folks use the “How was your day” question as a filler conversation for dinner time. However, when you love someone, you care about what happened in their day and how they’re doing.

6. Bring Them Breakfast in Bed

Songs have been written about the little things and their importance. A simple gesture like making breakfast in bed for them shows how much you care. You take time out of your day to make them feel special, and it’s a very kind act.

7. Turn on the PDA

Some people would prefer to keep public displays of affection to themselves. However, you must be considerate of the other person’s feelings. Your partner wants you to show the world that you’re not ashamed to be with them, and there’s nothing at that moment more important than feeling their touch and warm embrace.

8. Help Them Out

In a romantic relationship, you need to help one another. While it doesn’t seem like the stuff dreams are made of, having the support of your loved one means a lot.

If your partner struggles because of deadlines at work and other responsibilities, pitch in and help them out. Sometimes, you must get your hands dirty when you admire someone to make their lives easier.

9. Check in During the Day to Reveal Admiration

Find some time during the day to connect with text messaging. Even if it’s a funny meme or a joke you can’t wait to share, it shows you’re thinking about them. If you have a break or lunch hour at work, take a couple of minutes to check in with them during the day.

10. Make Time

You’re both busy, but you must make time for one another. You can show admiration by finding a way to be together. When people are dating, they will drive for many hours or fly across the world to see each other.

However, once you’re married or in a committed relationship, this shouldn’t change. If something is important to you, you will make time.

11. Use Spontaneity

Life can get pretty dull when everything is so routine and regimented. However, when you add a splash of pizzazz into the week, it shakes things up. A quick weekend away or a dinner at a fancy restaurant mid-week shows you can still turn on the charm for your crush.

12. Perform Acts of Service That Display Your Admiration

If you know anything about love languages, you know that some people need acts of service to fill their love tank. Doing little things, like a backrub, running a bubble bath, buying a new outfit, or making their favorite meal, can show how much you admire them.

According to Dr. Marni Amsellem from Psych Central, sometimes the most meaningful things in your relationship can’t be boxed with a pretty bow. She further states that doing little things for no other reason than “just because” can mean everything.

13. Make Their Dreams Come True

If you want to show admiration to someone you love, why not make their dreams come true? Maybe they dream of going to Italy and riding a Gondola down the Arno River. You win their hearts without saying a word when you take their highest hopes and dreams and make them a reality.

There’s an inner child inside each of you who wants someone to buy them the latest toy or take them on a memorable vacation. When you move mountains to make their dreams come true, you’ll capture their heart forever.

14. Write a Thank You Note

When did you last thank your significant other for all they do for you? Do they help keep the laundry clean, the house livable and go to work daily to provide money? Why not thank them for all these things?

So it’s not glamorous and doesn’t stand out as the most memorable thing to do, but it means a lot when you feel down and unappreciated. Hearing how proud you’re of them can show how much they’re admired.

15. Be a Good Listener

Why does it seem that listening to people requires so much work? When your significant other speaks to you, you must stop what you’re doing and engage. Being an active listener demonstrates that not only do you care about what they’re saying, but you’re taking time out of your day for them.

Final Thoughts on Ways to Show Admiration Silently

When you first start dating, you will flirt by playing footsie under the table, pouring affection, and doing anything to get them to commit. However, once you’ve been together for a while, you will find that things shift a bit.

When someone is by your side day in and day out, you slowly slip into a routine that can become mundane. You and your partner want to hear that you’re loved, but more than anything, you want someone to show you. Anybody can come up with beautiful words that seem like they were written for a card, but if there are no actions behind these sayings, they’re nothing more than words.

Things like holding the umbrella when it’s raining, doing all the chores so they can rest, or warming their clothes in the dryer on a cold day all show just how much they mean to you. Many relationships can’t survive without all these little things, as in the grand scale of things, they’re pretty substantial.

12 Benefits of Writing in a Positivity Journal Every Day

April 6, 2022 by Kristen Butler

Keeping a diary or journal-style recording of life events has been done since the dawn of time. Cave dwellers would carve pictures and leave these records for future generations to see their struggles and celebrations. Writing is a powerful tool, so have you ever considered keeping a positivity journal?

It’s possible that this optimistic writing style could change your life, and it can certainly alter your perspective of the world around you. The problem with journaling is that many people start it only to give it up a few days later, as it can sometimes be mundane. It would be best if you learned how beneficial it is to push through those times when you don’t want to do it.

The difference is that a positivity journal can inspire you and help you feel better. It’s an integral part of your self-care, and it can be beneficial for your overall health and well-being. Everyone benefits from keeping this style of an optimistic diary.

This is especially true of folks who are moody, have a negative mindset, and are often depressed, as they can find it even more helpful. Could this be the key to achieving a better perspective and developing a positive attitude?

Twelve Undeniable Benefits of Writing in a Positivity Journal

Journaling is known to help folks that suffer from anxiety disorders, like obsessive-compulsive disorder. Similar to depression, the encouraging results are well-documented. Here are some benefits to positive journaling for you to consider.

1. Keeping a Positivity Journal Enhances Your Creativity

Everyone has a creative side, but many folks need the inspiration to help them tap into it, and journaling can be that tool. When you get your creative juices flowing, you can bring a healing calm to yourself. Why do you think people paint, learn to play musical instruments, and craft?

Writing is another form of creativity, and greats like Mark Twain, Ernest Hemingway, and Agatha Christie, learned that writing could also be very profitable. Your imagination can be beneficial in many aspects of life, and journaling is a way to get started.

2. Releases Pent-up Feelings

Part of your emotional well-being is learning how to release your pent-up feelings. As you go through life, you carry a heavy load of stress. It doesn’t matter how much money you have or where you live; stress is inevitable.

However, journaling allows you a great outlet to get rid of those frustrations to develop a more positive mindset.

3. Writing in a Positivity Journal Improves Gratitude

You can make your writings part of a gratitude journal too. Taking the time to write down five things a day that you’re grateful for will change your outlook. Instead of always focusing on how bad things are when you start looking at the good side, it will alter your perceptions.

4. Change Your Mood

Do you wish that you could be in a better mood? A positivity journal may be just what you need to help boost your spirits. When you write down the things you’re thankful for, your goals, and your blessings, it can’t help but change how you feel.

Someone who dwells on the negative all the time will be pessimistic. However, the optimistic person will have a better outlook on life and an enhanced mood.

5. Prove Your Progress and Personal Growth with a Positivity Journal

A daily journal can be like a roadmap; there’s no right or wrong way to do it. You can set up your writings however you wish. This book can be imperative if you’re making a weight loss journey or achieving sobriety.

You can keep track of where you start and monitor your progress. You can look back through these writings and see the things you’ve overcome and how far you’ve been. It can be terrific for your psyche to see progress, which is one thing positivity journaling can provide.

6. Improve Your Quality of Life

Whatever you want to call it, taking time out of your day to sit alone and practice gratitude can significantly improve life quality. Scientists have even reported that writing down five things you’re thankful for every day can dramatically improve your outlook.

If you want an extraordinary life, you need this time to put everything else aside and focus on yourself. Find a comfortable space to sit alone and look at all the good things happening to you. Remember, since this is a positivity journal, you want to focus on the positive aspects.

When you write things in this book like:

“I got an unexpected pay raise today.”
“My kids picked me wildflowers and made me a handmade card.”
“I had a great day at work, and everything went my way.”
“I made a memorable dinner with all the trimmings, and my family loved it.”

Again, you can set up your journal however you like it, but the key here is that you’re creating positive memories. One day, when you look back on this list, you will see the little things that make your life so unique.

When you have times when the world seems cruel, and you don’t feel like you can go another day, reading things like these entries above can recharge your spirit.

7. Improves Physical Health

Who knew that keeping a gratitude journal could impact your health? First, writing about your blessings will help you have a sense of calm about yourself. It will allow you to handle stress better and help keep things like hypertension, headaches, and heart disease at bay.

Did you know that you can help control blood sugar with these writings? According to a study by the Journal of Positive Psychology, folks who use positivity journaling could lower their HbA1c levels within months.

8. A Positivity Journal Promotes Spiritual Growth

When you work to maintain a positive mindset, you become grateful for every cycle you experience. Learning to embrace those tough times can significantly impact your mental stress. Once you realize that hardship promotes growth, it changes your outlook when struggles come your way.

Through positive journaling and this process, many people realize the need for divine guidance and power more significant to help them. Using the timeline that this book provides shows that it’s been there all along.

9. You Increase Self-Esteem if You Keep a Positivity Journal

If you want a better mood, you need to start using a daily journal to enhance your self-esteem. It’s hard to stay in a poor air after reminding yourself of your worth. A study reported by Science Direct proves that people who engaged in body-focused positivity writing had a better overall view of themselves.

Additionally, there was less prejudice about weight, and people learned to accept themselves as they are. Participants became more accepting of themselves and those around them.

10. Improves Relationships

When was the last time someone acknowledged your accomplishments at home or work? How did you feel when you received this praise? It feels fantastic to be recognized for your contributions, but did you know that it can help you to improve your relationships?

It sounds bizarre that being praised helps with relationships. Consequently, some believe it demonstrates that giving and receiving gratitude gives you a deeper connection with people. It can improve your romantic relationships as well as those with coworkers.

11. You Sleep Better

Part of your emotional well-being is hinged on you getting sufficient rest. A study conducted by the National Library of Medicine found that people who express their gratitude and live with a positive mindset get better rest at night. There’s nothing worse than tossing and turning just to get a few hours of shut-eye.

12. Writing in a Positivity Journal Enhances Mental Well-Being

The decision to have a positive mindset will have an overwhelming effect on your mental health. According to the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, folks who wrote in a positivity journal daily had a more optimistic outlook for their future. The mental health benefits of keeping such a diary impact your physical body and mind.

12 things you should always track in your positivity journal

Here are some ideas to help you start journaling.

1. Track the Day’s Events in Your Positivity Journal

Whether big or small, keeping track of events is a great way to see what a typical day in your life looks like. As you remember these events, you may feel prompted to write how the event made you feel. For instance, if you went to a park during your lunch break, you might note how pleasant it was to sit in the sunshine for twenty minutes while you ate your sandwich. Even if the event seems mundane, it’s still significant because it was part of your day.

2. Make a Note of Any Challenges You Face

Be sure to write any challenges you faced during the day. Again, they can be big or small events. Perhaps someone was rude to you at the grocery, or you lost the car keys, and it took an hour to find them. Whatever your challenges, write them down in your positivity journal. Remember, you’re not alone. Everyone faces challenges in their daily life. Here are some everyday challenges everyone faces at some point in their life that challenge their positivity.

Feeling isolated at work or school.
Unsure about future; can’t decide about career or schooling, maybe need to change jobs.
No time to rest or relax. Family or work can be consuming. Feel you never get a break.
Financial pressures; not making ends meet financially or being in debt.
Over-committed: You give to saying yes all the time.
Relationship problems with family or friends. These struggles can wear you down.
Poor self-care: You don’t feel your best when you don’t eat right or exercise.
Being around negative people: You feel like the people around you don’t support you but pull you down.

3. Remember Positive Events of the Day

In light of the challenges you recorded, what positive steps did you take to overcome them? Maybe you ignored the rude person or turned on your favorite music while looking for your car keys. Whatever you did to get through the challenge, write it down.

4. Add Your Daily Accomplishments to a Positivity Journal

As you reflect on the day, look for your achievements that you can be proud of. They don’t need to be earth-shaking to be significant and meaningful. Maybe you finished reading a biography of someone you admire or organized the linen closet in your bathroom. Other things you could write:

Taking small steps to complete a project or begin a new project
Going to the gym for the first time in months
Eating healthy for an entire day
Making the dreaded phone call to talk to someone you needed to connect with
Making a doctor’s appointment, you’d been putting off
Getting the courage to tell someone you can’t do something instead of saying yes automatically

5. Keep Track of Your Exercise and Physical Activities

Record your physical activities, such as any sports you play, exercises you do, or long walks you take. Please record how long you did the training and whether or not you enjoyed it. Ways to get more physical exercise without even trying.

Park farther away from the store, so you need to walk farther.
Skip the elevator and walk up the stairs
Walk your dog
Walk to your friend’s house
While you’re at your child’s sporting events, walk around
Walk at the golf course instead of driving a golf cart
Ride your bike to the store

6. Remember to be Grateful

Write what you are grateful for today. Maybe you’re grateful to be pain-free today, thankful to see your family, or you can work remotely today. Focusing on gratitude can change your outlook on life.

A study at the University of Miami had one group of people record things they were grateful for during their week. A second group wrote their daily irritating situations or something they didn’t like each day. The third group of people wrote about events that happened to them, not bad or good, just what happened. After two and a half months of doing this, the researchers found that the people who wrote about what they were grateful for were more optimistic, didn’t focus on their problems as much, and didn’t go to the doctor. In general, these people were happier than the other groups.

Other ways you focus on gratitude each day include:

Thank someone today-Specifically thank someone today. You can do this in person or through an email or text. Tell them how you appreciate what they do. Explain how what they do makes your life and the lives of others better.
Pray for someone-Talk to God about this person. Thank him for creating them.
Practice mindfulness-Focus on the moment of your day and what you’re incredibly grateful for at that moment.

7. Share Your Thoughts on How Music Impacts Your Mood

Keep a record of any music you listened to today that enhanced your positive thinking. Usually, happy music makes you feel better. The upbeat tune and lyrics help your brain release chemicals that improve your mood. Consider creating a playlist of upbeat songs that make you optimistic about life. Listen to these songs when you’re down or need a boost in your day.

8. Note Anything That Delights You in a Positivity Journal

Who made you laugh out loud today? Was it a guy on TikTok? Or maybe your co-worker did something that made you laugh. Whoever it was, write about the experience in your positivity journal. When you reread this, no doubt just remembering it will give you a chuckle.

9. Reflect on Whether You Are Flexible or Resilient

Were you flexible today when you found out a coworker didn’t reserve the restaurant for a birthday lunch like they said they would? Were you resilient enough to find another place to eat, so the birthday lunch still happened? Life throws you surprise all the time. Flexibility means you can re-adjust when needed when there is a sudden change. Unexpected problems don’t cause you to fall apart, but you recover quickly and get the job done.

10. Think About the Tasty Foods You Ate to Instill Gratitude

It’s basic, but why not write about the foods you ate today in your positivity journal? Perhaps you tried something new and found out you like it. Or maybe you had dinner at your grandma’s, and she served your favorite casserole. If you savored each comforting bite, it’s worth writing about.

11. Release Negative Residue from the Day

So, what wasn’t your favorite thing today? Maybe you had to run errands and hate doing that. Or perhaps it was going to the dentist or taking your dog to the groomers. Everybody has their not-so-favorite things. Why not write about it to release the negative residue?

12. Explain What Made You Happy

What was something you enjoyed today? Maybe you took your kids to the pool, and it was fun chatting with other moms about your kids. Or perhaps you went to the gym with a buddy for the first time in months, and it was good to get caught up. Whatever the activity, write about how it made you feel.

Final Thoughts on the Benefits of Writing in a Positivity Journal

It’s easy to see that keeping a positivity journal comes with massive benefits. This powerful practice will help you be a better person and feel better. Journaling can enhance your mental, physical, spiritual, and emotional well-being and help you build resilience.

You can improve relationships with your partner, children, coworkers, and the divine, as well as reduce your stress levels. You can improve your self-esteem, learn to be more accepting of others, and be thankful for all the gifts received in life.

While you should strive to write in this journal every day, at least a few times a week will suffice. The important part is to get that pent-up anxiety and stress out of your heart and mind into a positivity journal. This little book is a roadmap of the times you won and the times you’ve lost, but most importantly, it’s a reminder that you’re resilient.

Researchers Reveal Which Exercise Is the Best To Relieve Chronic Anxiety

April 6, 2022 by Kristen Lawrence

Studies show that intensive exercise can help relieve symptoms of chronic anxiety. Of course, this doesn’t mean training provides a universal answer for mental health problems. Many other factors contribute to anxiety, such as stress levels, eating habits, brain chemistry, careers, and home life. However, exercising can provide a buffer against the stresses of modern life.

Anxiety often makes people feel paralyzed or afraid for no apparent reason. This feeling can strike unexpectedly, making them feel like they have no control over their mind. Exercise helps to boost confidence and release built-up tension, which eases anxiety temporarily. Over time, these cumulative effects can lead to increased mental resilience and perhaps total relief of anxiety.

How Intensive Exercise Helps Relieve Chronic Anxiety

Chronic anxiety doesn’t discriminate; it can affect anyone at various stages in life. Since our brains haven’t fully evolved for this modern world, many people experience anxiety. We’re no longer scanning the horizon for predators, but we have many other problems.

Since we live more sedentary lifestyles than our ancestors, these stresses accumulate in our bodies. Over time, it overwhelms our nervous systems and can cause chronic anxiety. However, perhaps we should look to the past to answer our mental health epidemic. Moving our bodies can reduce anxiety because it provides an outlet for excess energy.

Research shows that intensive exercise, such as aerobic activities, can help treat anxiety. High-intensity workouts may include running, biking, dancing, brisk walking, or swimming. It’s essential to choose something you can stick with long-term to reap the full benefits.

How Working Out Can Help Alleviate Anxious Feelings

Exercising helps relieve anxiety by:

Take the attention off your thoughts and onto an activity.
Reducing muscle tension, where most anxiety and stress get stored.
Increasing your heart rate alters brain chemicals. Intensive exercise floods the brain with neurotransmitters such as serotonin, gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA), brain-derived neurotrophic factor (BDNF), and endocannabinoids.
Activating frontal regions of the brain govern executive function, including the amygdala. Exercise helps strengthen neural circuits in this part of the brain, effectively reducing anxiety.
Increases self-efficacy, which makes a person less prone to anxious feelings.

Best Intensive Exercise to Reduce Anxiety Symptoms

So, you know that intensive exercise can help you feel less anxious and more relaxed. However, choosing the best exercises to relieve anxiety is not always easy. Luckily, experts have found that a few exercises reign supreme when easing anxious feelings.

Running boosts norepinephrine, a neurotransmitter that increases focus and alertness. It also releases endorphins, feel-good hormones responsible for the “runner’s high.” It can also enhance mental clarity because of increased oxygen in the prefrontal cortex. After just one running session, they were notable but increased with regular exercise.
Hiking or walking in the woods. When you’re surrounded by nature, it’s easy to forget about all the daily worries. Green spaces have been proven to lower anxiety, blood pressure, and heart rate because nature soothes the senses. In a Japanese study published in Environmental Health and Preventive Medicine, researchers told participants to walk in either a forest or city for 20 minutes. They found that those who walked in the woods had lower cortisol than those who went on an urban walk.
Yoga combines breathing techniques with specific postures to calm the mind and reduce stress. While some types of yoga are slower-paced, others offer intensive exercise. In 2012, a research team studied the impact of yoga on anxiety and stress. They reviewed trials and published the results in Alternative Medicine Review. In 25 of the 35 studies, participants noticed a significant decline in anxiety and stress levels after yoga practice.

Since many people don’t like taking anxiety medications, exercise provides an excellent natural remedy. The list above isn’t exhaustive by any means. Still, it can offer some ideas for a workout routine. In addition to intensive exercise, other lifestyle changes can ease chronic anxiety.

Other Ways to Lower Anxiety Levels

Give technology a break. We’re overstimulated with all our technology, between phones, computers, TVs, and other gadgets. Our minds need a break, so make sure to allot time each day for true rest. Many people use their downtime to scroll on social media or binge-watch a show, but this doesn’t relax your mind. To truly experience peace, it’s essential to shut everything off sometimes.
Eat a balanced diet. Our diets impact our mental health in profound ways. Studies have linked processed foods high in artificial sweeteners, sugar, gluten, and inflammatory omega-6 fatty acids to anxiety. On the other hand, eating a balanced diet full of fresh fruits, vegetables, nuts, seeds, and omega-3 fatty acids protects mental health.
Get your beauty rest. Today, many people suffer from chronic sleep deprivation, worsening anxiety, and depression. Put yourself first and make sure you’re sticking to a regular sleep schedule. Notifications on your phone or favorite TV show can always wait until the following afternoon.
Live a slower-paced life. To put it bluntly, we’re not designed for such a fast pace of life. Don’t feel inadequate or ashamed if you can’t or don’t want to keep up. Your mental health should come first, so if you feel overwhelmed, consider downsizing to reduce monthly bills. If you have less to pay for, you’ll have more free time and fewer mental burdens.

Final Thoughts on Engaging in Intensive Exercise to Reduce Chronic Anxiety

In recent years, anxiety levels have skyrocketed due to several factors. The pandemic, financial worries, climate change, career stress, and daily life, in general, have contributed to the mental health crisis. However, studies have shown that intensive exercise may help reduce anxiety symptoms. In addition to other lifestyle factors such as eating well, prioritizing sleep, and embracing minimalism, it’s possible to manage anxiety.

Of course, exercise and lifestyle changes don’t permanently eliminate anxiety for everyone. Many people find relief with medication, therapy, and natural remedies.

8 Social Factors That Hurt Children’s Mental Health, According to Psychology

April 6, 2022 by Kristen Lawrence

Researchers from Johns Hopkins University discovered eight social factors that influence childhood mental health. Their comprehensive multi-year study found that children exposed to adversity had an increased risk of developing cognitive, emotional, or behavioral problems. However, having strong family support and resilience could counteract the negative impacts of childhood adversity.

The study categorized adversity into two groups: relational and social. Researchers determined that relational risks decrease mental health in children more than social risks. Children exposed to substance abuse at home, for instance, displayed more behavioral, mental, and emotional problems than those facing social threats such as economic disparity.

The analysis is based on 2016-2019 data survey responses, including nearly 132,000 children ages 3 to 17. It examines the complex relationship between childhood mental health and social and relational health risks. The findings have been published online in the January 2022 issue of Child and Adolescent Psychiatric Clinics of North America.

Overall, the study determined that 21.8% of U.S. children in the age group surveyed experience one or more mental, emotional, or behavioral problems. The frequency of mental health problems across U.S. children ranged from roughly 15-60%. As exposure to social and relational risks increased, children typically displayed worse mental health.

“If we treat children with mental, emotional, and behavioral problems without individually and collectively addressing social and relational health risks, or even assessing them, which is often the case, we are missing some of the biggest factors driving the mental and emotional suffering of our children,” says study leader Christina Bethell, Ph.D., MPH, MBA, professor in the Department of Population, Family and Reproductive Health. She’s also the director of the Child and Adolescent Health Measurement Initiative at the Bloomberg School.

Child Psychologists Explain 8 Social Factors That Decrease Mental Health in Kids

Research shows that social factors and relational risks can cause behavioral, mental, and emotional problems in children. However, most of the previous studies have investigated only individual health risks. This study examines the individual and combined effects of social and relational problems on U.S. children.

Bethell and her team compiled data from the National Survey of Children’s Health for the study. The U.S. leads the yearly survey. Health Resources and Services Administration’s Maternal and Child Health Bureau and the U.S. Bureau of the Census. Parents and caregivers who complete the survey provide data on various, complex aspects of children’s lives. Topics in the survey include:

a child’s physical and mental health;
access to quality health care;
the child’s family life;
school and social experiences;
and neighborhood environment.

The results determined that over 66% of children with mental health problems experienced at least one of the eight relational or social factors investigated in the study. Only about 50% of children without mental health problems were exposed to adverse childhood experiences.

What Social Factors Did the Scientists Study?

The eight relational and social factors examined in the study included the following:

economic hardship
food insecurity
unsafe neighborhood
racial discrimination
multiple Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs), such as substance abuse or domestic violence
poor caregiver mental health
lack of resilience in caregivers
frequent conflict with their child

Compared with social factors, relational health risks occurred more frequently in children with mental health problems. They also had a stronger correlation with poor mental health. Almost one-third of children with mental disorders experience social and relational health risks.

Social Factors that Boost Childhood Mental Health

While these results are discouraging, the study also found opportunities to bolster children’s mental health. The authors determined that building resilience and being engaged at school could reduce negative impacts from adverse social factors. Being able to self-regulate during challenging times encourages self-confidence and more resilient children.

The research team discovered that children engaged in school 77% less when they lacked self-regulation skills. However, several factors helped increase their engagement in school. Children with mental health problems displayed self-regulation almost six times more often when they had a strong bond with their parents. These odds increased by over 2.25 times when their family remained cheerful and resilient during challenging times.

The findings remained steady among all levels of relational and social factors.

Bethell added that both parent-child relationships and family resilience stem from conditioned behaviors. This means that families can change their behaviors through effort and a desire for positive outcomes. For instance, building skills in resiliency and optimistic thinking can help mitigate any negative experiences.

Bethell also noted that the American Academy of Pediatrics encourages mental health professionals, doctors, and school personnel to promote these skills. Teaching positive social factors to children and their families early in life will help strengthen society as a whole.

The study co-author Tamar Mendelson, Ph.D., MA, a Bloomberg Professor of American Health in the Bloomberg School’s Department of Mental Health, says this:

“There is a mental, emotional, and behavioral health crisis for children in our country, but most children with these conditions have risk factors that we can identify and do something about. Ultimately, we need to address the structural and systemic issues that threaten young people’s well-being; at the same time, there is a lot we can be doing to decrease risk factors for families.”

The Robert Wood Johnson Foundation funded the study.

Many children today experience social factors and stressors contributing to poor mental health. We shouldn’t expect them to bear the burdens for their parents or other caregivers at such a young age. As such, it’s essential to provide a calm, loving atmosphere in addition to coping skills. Protecting their emotional health early in life will ensure they become strong, healthy adults.

Final Thoughts on Social Factors that Impact Childhood Mental Health

Children are like sponges, picking up on social and emotional cues from their environment. Their developing minds require stability, support, and love to function correctly. However, many children today face multiple negative relational and social factors that harm their mental health. Adverse childhood experiences such as poverty, racial discrimination, stressful home life, and unsafe neighborhoods can impact their behavior and school engagement.

However, researchers from Johns Hopkins University also identified coping skills that children can develop to mitigate the adverse effects of these social factors. They say that a strong relationship with the family, resiliency, and self-regulation can promote positive outcomes and better mental health in young children.

How to End a Bad Relationship on a Positive Note

April 6, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

Staying in an unhappy or failed relationship isn’t beneficial to either partner. Many people take relationships lightly and allow bad relationships to affect them mentally, emotionally, and physically. They stick around to avoid the uncomfortable experience of a breakup, but there are ways to end a relationship on a positive note.

While it’s good to try and save your relationship, it’s sometimes not possible. Things don’t always work out, and the relationship could continue to affect you negatively. Even if you want it to last forever, you must admit when it has become a heavy burden.

Ending a relationship is difficult, even when you’re the one doing it. Emotions run high when you close this chapter of your life, and it’s never easy to say goodbye. It’ll be easier if you don’t end things on a negative note, though, and things will be smoother and less harmful.

These tips can help you end your relationship on a positive note, allowing both of you to move forward. They’ll promote healing and acceptance, and it won’t be so awkward if you run into your ex later.

Why Relationships End

Essentially, it doesn’t always matter why you want to end a romance. If you want out of the relationship or feel like your needs are unmet, that is all the reason you need. However, relationships often end for many different reasons, including these:

Conflict
Personality differences
Lack of quality time
Infidelity
Lack of positive interactions
Low relationship satisfaction overall

Ways to End a Bad Relationship on a Positive Note

There’s no best way to end a relationship, but you can take steps to make it a little easier. Everyone is different, so you must determine which tips work for your situation. Consider the needs and feelings of your partner, and think about their personality before you decide how to end things.

1 – Set up to End on a Positive Note by Having the Conversation in Person

Technology makes it easy to send a message to break up with someone. However, a virtual breakup will always end things negatively, leading to shock and confusion. It can increase heartbreak because of the lack of consideration given.

Plus, virtually breaking up can make your partner think there’s a chance that things will be okay when you meet up in person. A face-to-face conversation is the best way to handle a breakup. While a secluded location is beneficial, you can choose a public place if you fear a violent reaction.

2 – Don’t Blame the Other Person

Avoid blaming your partner, and don’t accept blame, either. Instead, avoid blame by accepting the situation and planning to move on. Blaming one another can lead to hatred or cause you to cling to each other to prove the other wrong.

While it might be tempting, you should avoid voicing complaints that could hurt your partner’s feelings. Even if your thoughts are accurate, it’s best to let them go because it won’t help. Blaming one another is hurtful and can lead to fights, not allowing you to end things on a positive note.

3 – Give Genuine Reasons, but Don’t Be Mean

While you don’t want to blame your partner, you must give a genuine reason. The other person should have the chance to understand why the relationship is over. It eliminates misunderstandings, helps ease heartbreak, and allows for growth.

As you give the reason, make sure you’re not being harsh. It could make the other person angry and defensive, hindering your efforts to end on a positive note. Be honest about the reason, but don’t give so much detail that it harms your partner’s self-esteem.

4 – Remember That It Isn’t Easy

There is no simple way to end a relationship, so don’t find the easy way out. No matter how you do it, there will be pain involved for both of you. Even when the relationship went south long ago, there will be hurt feelings and pain.

Remembering that it isn’t easy will give you the courage to follow your plan. Don’t linger in an unhappy relationship because it’s easier than ending things. Acknowledging the pain will prepare you for the experience and aftermath.

5 – Don’t Cave to Arguments or Protesting

Your partner might want to argue or protest the breakup, but don’t give in. If the situation surprises your partner, their arguments might be even worse. They will likely get defensive and offer reasons to stay together and try again.

While you might waver because of their arguments, remind yourself of all the reasons you need this to happen. Stay firm, and don’t cave into their protests, or you’ll likely have to do this entire process again soon. If you don’t give in, you can start the healing process immediately, allowing things to end positively.

6 – Don’t Suggest Keeping in Touch

If you want your relationship to end positively, you must make a clean break. You might think it’s kind to suggest keeping in touch or staying friends, but it won’t go well. To move on from a relationship, you must take time away to heal.

If you continually see your ex or spend time with them, it’ll be harder to move on, worsening the pain. It might be possible to become friends again when you’ve both healed, but now isn’t the time.

7 – Express Sympathy

You’ll likely be sad about the breakup even if you decide to do it. Consider how you feel and say things that help you both feel better. If you feel sad about it, imagine how your soon-to-be ex feels.

Although the relationship didn’t work out, there’s no reason to cause more pain than necessary. Show sympathy during the experience by discussing some of the good times you had together. It helps soften the blow and makes it more likely that you’ll end on a positive note.

Whatever you say, express sympathy by letting your partner know they positively impacted your life. Also, let them know that you feel sad about the situation and that it isn’t what you had hoped for.

8 – Don’t Wait

The timing will never be perfect, so don’t wait for an ideal time or situation. Instead, end the relationship as soon as you know that you will. If you wait, it’ll be harder for both of you.

When you know your relationship is over, please take the necessary steps to end it. You don’t need to receive permission from anyone, as this is your situation. Trust your gut, and don’t put off the inevitable.

9 – Prepare Yourself Mentally to End on a Positive Note

When you realize your relationship has no future, start planning to end it. Preparing for the breakup can help you move on, allowing your partner to realize that things aren’t working. While you shouldn’t wait to end things, you should create a plan and do some things to prepare.

You can start preparing by not making plans together for the future. When you don’t have any upcoming plans, it makes the breakup less devastating when the situation occurs. Plus, it can create an opening to have a discussion.

Additionally, you’ll want to prepare the setting for your breakup. Preparing the stage for the situation might sound crazy, but you’ll want to ensure no distractions. You’ll also want to ensure no third parties present that could create conflicts or offer unwarranted judgment.

10 – Say Some Good Things About the Other Person

Breaking up will likely make your partner feel bad about themselves, so do what you can to ease the situation. Bring up the things you enjoyed about the other person, and be sincere as you do it.

Focus on positive aspects of your relationship and things your partner did well. They’ll feel better knowing that you appreciate and care about them.

11 – Be Clear

Don’t use vague terminology when breaking up with someone. You want your partner to know what you’re getting at and ensure they don’t think they can change your mind. Use specific words to prevent confusion, including:

End the relationship
Stop being a couple
Separate

12 – Avoid Comparisons to Keep Things on a Positive Note

It’s tempting to compare yourself to the other person or compare the other person to someone else you know. However, comparisons are sure to cause the relationship to end negatively. Even if you think your relationship was the worst, avoid comparing because it doesn’t help.

Final Thoughts on How to End a Bad Relationship on a Positive Note

Breaking up with someone is never easy, but you can take steps to end it on a positive note. Focus on being kind and sympathetic, and avoid blaming and comparing. Remember that as badly as you’re feeling right now, your partner will feel bad, too.

If you want things to end positively, follow the tips discussed above. Then, if you run into your ex later on, things aren’t awkward or tense. Plus, you can move on without worrying about bad karma catching up to you.

Having A Bad Day? Rescue Yourself with These 12 Self-Care Tips

April 5, 2022 by Deborah Tayloe

Bad days are inevitable, and everybody has them. How can you be happy when it seems like the whole world is falling in around you? You know there’s power in being positive, but sometimes you feel like throwing in the towel and waving the white flag to surrender.

How would you know how sweet the sunshine is if you never experienced rainy seasons? It’s hard going through those storms, but you must learn to treat yourself well in good times and bad. On those days when you want to run and hide, you need to engage in self-love even more.

Twelve Self-Care Tips to Rescue Yourself at the End of a Bad Day

What you do in these moments that test your will is what matters most. Some people can’t take the pressure and turn to unhealthy habits that do nothing but cause further damage, like smoking, drinking excessive amounts of alcohol, and doing drugs. Thankfully, there are much better ways to deal with your problems than putting a band-aid over them.

It’s beneficial to have healthy coping mechanisms to ease your anxiety and allow you to rest your mind. Here are some of the best ways to rescue yourself and show the self-love you desperately need when everything goes wrong.

1. Take a Bubble Bath to Soothe Your Soul After a Bad Day

Something is soothing and tranquil about water, so it’s no wonder that a bubble bath can make you feel better. The heat from the water can relax tense muscles, which often happens during bad days. To make this bath even more healing, why not add soft music and a few candles to add ambiance?

2. Call a Friend or Family Member

Having an inner circle of positive people is imperative for times like these. Call your friend or relative when you think you can’t go another step. They can listen and give sage advice that can help sustain you until the dark cloud lifts.

Everyone needs someone they can call who will always be on your side, no matter what happens. Sometimes, hearing the voice of someone who loves and cares about you can make you happy on a bad day.

3. Say Goodbye to a Bad Day by Treating Yourself Well

Part of loving yourself is to get the occasional reward. Bad days are the best time to give yourself a little pick me up. Is there a new purse or wallet you’ve had your eye on, or perhaps it’s time for a new, more stylish haircut?

People think children are the only ones who like to be rewarded, but it’s not true. Adults love reward programs, too, and why do you think employers use financial incentives to boost morale and increase production?

4. Go For a Drive

You know it’s essential to treat yourself well, and sometimes, this means getting away from the everyday grind and relaxing. There’s something very tranquil about a car ride in the country. Roll down the windows and blast your favorite songs if the weather permits.

Life often seems like a monotonous routine where you do the same old thing. It would help if you had something to shake up your schedule to make it seem bearable. When you’re having a horrible day, just breaking free, feeling the wind in your hair, and belting out your favorite tunes can change everything.

5. Throw Down in the Kitchen After a Bad Day

Maybe you have culinary skills and like to throw down in the kitchen. Why not look up some fantastic recipes online and try your hand at something new? Did you know that many folks find cooking relaxing and inspirational?

Registered dietician Sharon Palmer contributed to a study published by US News and World Report. They found that some people who engage in cooking find it as relaxing as meditation. Cooking is considered a blessing in many countries, especially in nations that experience shortages and supply issues.

Not only can cooking benefit your mental health, but it can remind you of the blessings you’ve been given, like food on your table.

6. Count Your Blessings

These rough days sometimes happen because we aren’t looking at the big picture. You find yourself stuck in the drama regarding a situation that’s out of your control. However, have you ever stopped and taken a minute to look at all your blessings?

So many times, your blessings come through raindrops, and your healing will come through your tears. In these downtimes, why not develop an attitude of gratitude? It’s pretty hard to be upset and worried about a gossiping coworker or other trivial issues when you focus on things like a roof above you, an excellent place to sleep, food on your table, and a nice pair of shoes on your feet.

7. Meditate

You’ve already heard the benefits of meditation, but if you haven’t tried it yet, you don’t know what you’re missing. You can inhale a new, more positive attitude and exhale all the bad juju you’ve picked up. Releasing the angst inside and learning to breathe is a powerful way to combat those bad days.

8. End a Bad Day with Prayer

Your religion or beliefs don’t matter here. The key is that it’s very comforting to realize that someone powerful has your back, says a study by Harvard University and McLean Hospital in 2011.

This research aimed to see if believing in God made people happier. The study found that humans are hardwired to believe in a higher power of some kind. They also found that the more intuitive you are, the more likely you believe in God.

Other shocking findings included that people who believe in God don’t worry as much about the future, have a stress-reducing benefit, and find comfort in knowing that something or someone is watching over them from above.

9. Listen To Ted Talks

Ted Talks became a popular outlet a few years ago that showcases the human spirit. These influential videos can make your bad day seem futile when considering what these people have overcome. Besides this one, there are other sites, but Ted Talks appears to be the most popular.

When you feel down and out, and like you can’t go on, find one of these inspirational stories to lift your spirits.

10. Journal Your Feelings

If you hate writing, type out your feelings in a digital log. The key is that you need to get all that depression and anxiety from within your being and put it somewhere safe. A journal creates an excellent roadmap that can help you see where you’ve been but remind you that you’re not stuck on this stormy day.

11. Sit Outside to Close Out a Bad Day

Though it sounds a bit cliche, grab a glass of lemonade and a good book and head outside. Find a shady spot, curl up with your book, and enjoy all Mother Nature offers. There’s something so relaxing about hearing the birds chirp and enjoying the sights and smells of the great outdoors.

When you’re having a rough day, it seems like stepping outside can make everything seem much better. Additionally, if you need help with grounding, take your shoes off and feel the earth between your toes. The planet’s vibrations can pair with your vibrations and bring you back to a center point.

12. Go Out to Dinner or a Movie

When you’re feeling bad, the worst thing you can do is sit behind four walls and sulk. You should get out and enjoy the company of friends. Why not try a new restaurant you’ve wanted to explore, or there may be a good movie you’ve been waiting to see?

When you’re having a bad day, you must love yourself enough to do something that counters these negative feelings. So, what better way to show yourself how resilient you are than to go out and have fun despite how you feel?

Final Thoughts on Self-Care Tips to Rescue Yourself After a Bad Day

Which of these twelve self-care tips do you think you’re likely to use? Maybe you have other methods to calm yourself and counter those bad days. The key is not to let anything that life throws your way get you down.

Depression and anxiety can easily slip in, and these feelings are circumstantial in many cases. You’re resilient and can withstand much more than you ever imagine, but it’s all about having the proper coping mechanisms to get you through. If nothing else works, why not visit the less fortunate or those sick in the hospital to help put things into perspective?

Even your worst day here on earth is better than the alternative. So many people would have loved to have one more day on this planet, even if it was bad. As long as you have breath in your body and a will to live, you can overcome anything these down days bring.

15 Websites to Help You Learn Something New Every Day (for Free!)

April 5, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

One of the best ways to improve your life is to learn something new. No matter how much knowledge you possess, there is always something more out there. You can build on skills you already have or spend time focusing on something entirely new.

While you might not think you have the time to take an in-person class, you do have other options. You might also believe that acquiring a new skill requires paying for expensive courses. However, there are many free options for development and growth.

Learning something new is exciting, and you shouldn’t miss out on it because of cost or time constraints. Luckily, you will find websites to help you learn something new every day for free. If you have self-motivation and a focused mind, you can Learn baking and other useful skills online.

Instead of missing out or spending time sitting through long lectures, you can make progress on your schedule. These websites will help you learn something new without requiring schedule or financial changes.

Free Websites to Help You Learn Something New Every Day

Check out these free learning resources.

1. Coursera

As a website that works with universities and reputable organizations, Coursera offers many online courses for free. Aside from universities, you’ll find courses from museums and trusts, too. The course selection is vast, and it’s easy to search for something that’ll interest you.

Not only do you have plenty of courses to choose from, but the courses are also in-depth. Each one lasts about four to twelve weeks, depending on the topic. The lessons consist of video lectures, quizzes, weekly exercises, peer-revied assignments, and a final project or exam.

2. Khan Academy

The teachers for Khan Academy break down complicated topics into simple concepts for you to understand. Rather than devoting lots of time to long lessons, Khan Academy allows you to learn in just a few minutes each day. You can spend more time if you want, but it isn’t necessary for making progress.

Khan Academy is user-friendly, making it easy to stick to your goals. They use short videos to teach information, allowing you to retain each bit of information. Plus, you can do optional supplementary practice exercises.

3. Hackaday

Hackaday is a website that offers information on making your life easier and becoming more productive. The courses focus on life hacks and productivity, and many of them take only five minutes each day. If you need to learn more about technology, this website is the perfect one for you.

You can find more than just technology hacks on Hackaday, too. They also offer information on art, design, and science.

4. Open Culture Online Courses

Open Culture Online Courses offer thousands of lectures, videos, and podcasts from universities worldwide. They offer a wide variety of topics, allowing you to learn something new every day. Some of their content comes directly from the private sites of prestigious universities.

Their website is easy to browse, making it easy to find the content you desire. It allows you to choose information from many universities all in one place rather than browsing each website.

5. Highbrow

Highbrow is a user-friendly website with plenty of courses on business, marketing, creativity, design, history, and more. When you sign up, you’ll receive new lessons in your e-mail each morning, allowing you to learn something new every day.

The courses are only five minutes each and offer plenty of information to help you become a better version of yourself. They even give tips and offer lessons on being happy, working with a focused mind, and negotiating better.

6. Lynda

Created by LinkedIn, Lynda offers thousands of courses about business, marketing, design, and software tools, including Photoshop. It is only free for the first ten days, but you can learn so much during that time. The courses are taught by experts, allowing you to improve your skills exponentially.

After the ten days are up, you can decide to pay to continue using their platform. You can use the skills you learn in a professional or personal setting, so you’ll never run out of new content.

7. Academic Earth

Academic Earth brings many courses from universities to one place on their website. The lessons are taught by professionals and experts, ensuring you get the best information. Academic Earth offers courses on many subjects, so you can find anything you’re looking for. It’s easy to find courses that interest you as they are listed by subject and school.

8. Rype

If you want to learn a foreign language, Rype is the website for you. You can get an unlimited number of 1-on-1 language lessons with professionals from around the world. The lessons are thirty minutes each, easily fitting into your daily schedule. Plus, the short sessions make it easier to retain the information.

Rype is only free for the first two weeks, but you can get a good start during that time. You can decide if it works for you before committing financially.

9. Codeacademy

Codeacademy can help you learn to build a website through an interactive approach to coding. It helps you learn programming languages including HTML, CSS, JavaScript, Ruby on Rails, and much more.

On Codeacademy, you will learn by practicing the languages without spending time on the theory. You can practice the languages while still viewing the lesson material, allowing optimal progress. The things you learn on Codeacademy can be used on your resume, helping you get a job or promotion. They can also help you build a website and take your future into your own hands.

10. Lifehack Fast Track Class

The skills you’ll learn from Lifehack Fast Track Class will help you make the most of your time, energy, and quality of life. The courses give expert mentoring and coaching to succeed with your business.

You’ll gain tools that allow you to understand powerful internet marketing concepts, including training in affiliate business. The courses also offer general knowledge on business strategies, personal development, management, and many other topics.

11. Calm

Calm is a website all about meditation, teaching you how to get started or do different types. There are step-by-step guides for everyone, no matter how much you know about meditation. It helps with your first experience, but you can also find more in-depth teachings to help build on your skills.

The teachers are easy to follow, and they offer enlightening insight into the practice of mediation. Calm is especially beneficial to those who struggle with stress and anxiety. It teaches you how to use your breathing to increase your overall well-being.

12. Investopedia

If you’re interested in finances, then Investopedia is the website for you. The website offers courses in personal finance, investing, and market analysis.

Finances are tricky, and you might not know where to begin, but Investopedia has all of the information you could ask for. You can spend a little time on their website each day, ensuring that you learn something new every day.

13. Udemy

Udemy offers many courses covering a variety of topics. Their concept is similar to Coursera’s but has some additional options. You can build custom courses from the lessons you find, allowing you to take control.

When you can customize your courses, you ensure the best course for your needs. You won’t have to waste time on concepts you don’t want or need. The customized option still offers courses from professors at top universities worldwide.

Udemy focuses on providing top-quality content, so you’ll always receive the best information. They offer free courses, but you will find paid content mixed in.

14. Big Think

Big Think is another website that allows you to learn from experts worldwide. You can learn about scientific breakthroughs, business concepts, and many other topics. They offer courses about anything from disease research to social media data. Their short videos allow you to learn something new every day, and you commit less than ten minutes of your time.

15. 7-Min

Many people want to become more active but don’t know how to find the time. 7-Min is a website that teaches you dozens of seven-minute workout routines to help you get in shape. With these exercises, you can stay active even with a busy life.

No matter how much time your work, family, and hobbies take, you can spare seven minutes to be active. You can save time by not having to drive to the gym and back, and you’ll still get a little physical activity in. It’s harder to make excuses when the exercise takes up so little of your time.

Final Thoughts on Finding Wonderful Websites to Help You Learn Something New Every Day (for Free!)

You no longer have to go to in-person courses to learn something new every day. You can learn new skills or build on pre-existing strengths through these helpful websites. When it’s so easy to develop new skills, you have no excuse for not bettering yourself every day.

Try out the websites and see how much you learn in just a short time. You’ll learn to love free online educational resources, continually boosting your learn .

15 Ways Toxic People Use Humiliation to Control Others

April 5, 2022 by Deborah Tayloe

Relationships require mutual trust and respect, whether they are personal or professional. If these elements are lacking, the relationship won’t work. It may also turn toxic when control issues and humiliation are thrown into the mix.

Humiliation, humility, and humbleness have the same Latin root humilis, which means bringing someone low to the ground. While being humble is a virtue, humiliation is merciless. It’s using words and actions to demean, hurt, control, or even destroy others.

Have you ever played the game “King of the Mountain” as a kid? You and your friends found a small hill and raced to see who could reach the top first. The first person to the top was considered king or queen of the mountain until other players pushed them aside and claimed their royal title.

It may have been a harmlessly fun childhood game, but it’s not so fun in real life. Some people are so self-absorbed that they’ll stop at nothing to gain more influence, power, and possessions. They will push, manipulate, and humiliate their way to the top of society’s hill.

The game rules haven’t changed, but it’s just become personal and malicious in the adult world. Humiliation is a toxic mix of verbal, mental, psychological, and emotional abuse. It often goes unnoticed because the resulting scars are internal and can affect the survivor for years afterward.

Fifteen Ways that Abusive People Use Humiliation to Control Others

Abusive control issues can exist in any relationship: family, friends, employers, or coworkers. The ploys usually start with simple problems but gradually escalate to toxicity. These are fifteen ways that toxic people humiliate others to get their way.

1. You Might See Manipulation by Humiliation

Abusive people humiliate others to manipulate their thoughts, words, and actions. They’ll continually needle you until you get frustrated and do what they want. If they have to insult and bully you, they’ll do it to get your cooperation.

2. Gaslighting

A critical element that toxic people use to humiliate others is gaslighting. It’s a cruel psychological game where they try to convince you that you’ve lost your senses. They patronize and shame you until you start believing that every issue in the relationship is your fault.

3. Jealousy

If you’re in a personal or professional abusive relationship, you’ll notice the person’s jealous nature. They are inwardly seething when something good happens or you accomplish something. They’re not interested if they can’t be the star.

Sure, they’ll be right at your side during trying times. However, they’re with you to boast and not as actual support. They not only can’t rejoice with you, but they’ll use humiliation as a weapon to downgrade your good news.

4. Judgmental Statements Cause Others to Feel Humiliation

When condemning others, toxic personalities are the judge and jury. They harshly critique people’s looks and everything about them. Neither family, friends, coworkers, nor strangers are immune from their venomous remarks.

Ironically, the faults these people find in others are often the same ones they have too. So, they hide their imperfections by judgment, humiliation, and hurtful words. Be assured that if they are badmouthing others, they do the same to you behind your back.

5. Blame Shifting

Blame-shifting is a standard tool in narcissists’ arsenal. It is the person’s way of deflecting their responsibility. Rather than own up to their shortcomings and offenses, they blame it on other people, usually those closest to them.

6. Don’t Respect Boundaries

For any relationship to be healthy and lasting, you need boundaries. These are essential, whether it’s personal or professional. Boundaries tell people what you find is acceptable or unacceptable behavior in your life.

Unfortunately, controlling individuals only care about their limitations. They will use manipulation and humiliation to push you past your limits. Little by little, you lose ground until they ultimately control the relationship.

7. Constantly Sarcastic to Cause Humiliation

To increase their habit of humiliation, toxic people often use mean-spirited sarcasm. They don’t even have to raise their voice or utter insults up front. The tone they use and the implications can be hurtful, even when they’re said with a smile.

These poisonous personalities have perfected the intolerable art of the backhanded compliment. They often use these as a twisted form of humor, but they’re the only ones laughing. For example: “Your new hairstyle looks great. Are you wearing a new wig to cover your bald spots?”

8. Refuse to Apologize

Since many abusive people are selfish, they can fathom being wrong. It would indicate that they aren’t perfect and in control. Offering an apology is a sign of weakness they aren’t willing to display.

Even when forced to apologize, it’s rarely genuine or heartfelt. They’ll find a way to turn the tables on you as if you made them do it. Physically abusive people often say, “If you didn’t make me so angry, I wouldn’t have hit you.”

9. Insulting

Malicious people are in their toxic element when they’re in a group. The only way they know how to build themselves up is to belittle others. They can be exceedingly hurtful if you’re their partner, friend, or coworker.

They do their dirty work under the pretext of a joke. Their heartless humor often has veiled prejudice and hate. If you get defensive, this person will quickly say it was a “joke,” and you don’t have a good sense of humor.

10. Demand Loyalty

If you’ve been in a toxic relationship, you understand how these harsh people demand loyalty. Although they’ll never admit it, they are insecure and are afraid of losing control over you. So, they constantly expect you to prove that you choose them over everyone else.

They get agitated and more controlling when they think you’re getting too close to family or friends. They’ll often say, “it’s either them or me.” Unless you take a stand, they’ll completely isolate you.

11. Inconsistent Behavior

Having friends and loved ones treat you the same way every day is refreshing. When dealing with a toxic person, you never know who you’ll get. One day, they may be pleasant, ranting and raving the next.

Beyond obvious mental issues, this is another control ploy. They don’t want you to get comfortable and perhaps stand up to them. It’s like being stuck in a house of mirrors, and you don’t know what you’ll see next. Sadly, there could be a condition like bipolar disorder lingering under the surface and fueling these inconsistencies.

12. Humiliation Tactics and Bragging Go Hand-in-Hand

People who are constantly boasting to others lack self-esteem. They think that if they brag about their possessions and accomplishments, others will admire them more. Abusive individuals take it further by belittling others while making their brags.

Not only have they experienced everything you have, but their story is better. They even try to “one-up” people in a hurtful situations.

13. Take Advantage of You

Healthy relationships are all about giving and taking. However, toxic people are always on the take side. The kinder you are, and the more you try to give them, they expect more.

They can take advantage of you in all aspects of your life, such as your love, time, and resources. Should your generosity hesitate, they’ll often use guilt or abuse to get what they want.

14. Pathological Liars

Poisonous personalities are so used to lying that they may begin to believe the lies themselves. An article published by PsychCentral states that pathological lying happens with little or no empathy. According to the report, it’s usually a borderline, narcissistic, or antisocial personality disorder symptom.

Unlike compulsive liars, pathological liars can control their behavior. Pathological liars also have an ulterior motive for their manipulative falsehoods. They often create a mythical world where they have absolute control and authority.

15. They Have Control Issues

Some individuals can’t be in any relationship unless they exert control. It can be a toxic mate or a micromanaging boss who must have you under their thumb. Such control issues may stem from low self-esteem or power-hungry narcissism.

If they can control small things, they’ll eventually seize complete control. They’ll criticize and manipulate every aspect of your being until you feel like a lifeless puppet. These people will use every cruel trick and device to break your will so that you will obey them without question.

Final Thoughts on Humiliation and Control Issues

Nobody has the right to humiliate, hurt, or control you. If you’ve identified one or more of these signs in a personal or professional relationship. Assert your requests and walk away with the dignity you deserve.

These narcissists will destroy you if you stay and allow them, but leaving this horrible situation takes a stronger person to break the ties that bind.

12 Ways to Repair Broken Trust in a Relationship

April 5, 2022 by Chris Butler

Trust is foundational in a healthy relationship. While each person interprets what it means to be trustworthy, in essence, it means to have a firm belief in someone based on truth, honesty, and reliability. You know you can rely on your partner because you feel safe with them and are confident. They won’t purposely hurt you.

Trust makes a relationship more meaningful. It allows you and your partner to be vulnerable with one another without fear of judgment. But sometimes, there is broken trust in a relationship. How do you gain back the confidence you once had with your partner?

12 Ways to restore a relationship fraught with broken trust

Here are some suggestions of twelve ways to repair broken trust in a relationship for you and your partner.

1. Be honest

If there is broken trust in your relationship, honesty is essential. Don’t dance around the issue, but bring it up with our partner in a kind but firm way. Please don’t assume you know what they’re thinking but ask lots of questions. Try to understand what happened and what they’re feeling. Lying won’t help resolve the problems, so resist the temptation to skirt the truth. Even if you think you’re telling a “little white lie,” it’s not helpful for your relationship.

2. Open communication

If you don’t understand, ask for clarity. Find a time and a place to talk where you won’t be interrupted. Allow time to discuss what’s going on. You may need to talk about the issues throughout a couple of days. Reassure your partner that you’re for them and want to understand. If they’re sorry for what they’ve done, be sure to assure them of your love. This doesn’t mean you tell them it’s okay what they did but try to separate them from their actions. On the other side of the coin, don’t be quick to say, “It’s okay.” Take your time to figure out what’s going on in your heart.

3. Be respectful when restoring broken trust

When you’re hurt, it’s easy to feel dissatisfied and angry. Even in your anger, be respectful towards them. This is someone you love. Even if they messed up big time, you could be courteous to them.

4. Listen well

Be attentive to your partner as they share. Make eye contact and lean forward in your chair. Nod your head to show you’re fully engaged in listening to what they say. Other things you can do to listen well include:

Give your partner your full attention
Don’t interrupt them as they share
Ask open-ended questions that require more than yes or no.
Please clarify what you think you hear them saying to you.
Don’t judge until you hear the whole story

5. Forgive as you start to repair broken trust

If your partner has been untrustworthy and is sorry for what they’ve done, forgive them. After all, everyone makes mistakes. Of course, this doesn’t mean you’ll trust them right away. Depending on what they did, it may take some time for them to earn back your trust. But for your own sake and the health of your relationship, you will need to forgive them.

6. Explain what you need to trust them

Honestly, explain to your partner what you need them to do to rebuild your trust. Explain how their actions affected you and what your struggles are now. Your partner isn’t a mind reader. They need to understand what will be helpful to you and what won’t be beneficial.

7. Be patient–broken trust is a lengthy fix

If your partner has been untrustworthy, remember to be patient. Once you hear them out and understand the reason behind their untrustworthiness, then you need to be patient with them as they gain your trust again.

8. Don’t overreact

While your partner is building your trust, it may tempt you to overreact especially if you think they’ve fallen back into their old behavior. If you’re curious about what’s going on, ask. Don’t assume you know and get upset until you have all the facts.

9. Don’t hold their lack of honesty over their head

If your partner is working hard to change, don’t keep bringing up their past offenses. It’s humiliating and discouraging to rehash past mistakes over and again. If you genuinely offer forgiveness, you must stop reminding them about their past mistakes.

10. Don’t keep secrets

Be quick to share things that happened at work or school. Share your temptations and stuff you’re thinking about. This helps both of you understand there are no secrets between you.

11. Trustworthy behavior earns faith

No amount of gifts or promises can earn back your trust. Remind your partner that their trustworthy actions and behavior will show you they are a reliable individual.

12. Lay a new foundation to rebuild after broken trust

In a relationship with broken trust, you’ll need to rebuild the foundation of trust between the two of you. Begin to incorporate the things like honesty, commitment, and loyalty into your relationship. If you two are wholly committed to making your relationship work, you will succeed in re-establishing the trust you need.

What are signs of broken trust in a relationship?

Signs of broken trust in your relationship include:

Dishonesty: Your partner doesn’t tell you the whole truth. Perhaps they lie about buying an expensive item or say they’ll come to an event and then never show up. Their dishonest actions make you feel unfair. They’re not trustworthy.
Disloyal: A partner can show disloyalty by sharing private conversations you’ve had as a couple with others. They may make fun of you in public. Relationships are built on trust that another person has your best interest in mind. That means they are loyal and protective of you.
Withdraw: When your partner withdraws from you emotionally or physically, it’s a red flag that something is wrong. Perhaps they feel ashamed of what they did. Or they may be angry at you and seeking revenge by withdrawing from you. Whatever the reason, you must understand what’s going on by asking questions.
Undependable: Your relationship depends on your ability to trust your partner. You rely upon them to do the things they commit to. If they commit to helping you clean up the backyard but then make excuses when it’s time to work, you’ll feel you can’t depend upon them. Broken promises, no matter how small, are a sign that your partner isn’t wholly omitted from you or the relationship.

What causes broken trust issues?

During childhood, the foundation of trust is created. Your experiences with trustworthy adults early in life affect how you interpret trust and respond to in your relationships as an adult. The relationship you had with your parents or caregivers set you up for future relationships. Here are some situations that may cause you to not trust people in relationships.

Neglect, lack of love and affection from your parents or caregivers
Divorce
Emotional or physical abuse
Having a parent or caregiver that’s addicted to drugs or alcohol or gambling
Being cheated on by a spouse or partner as an adult
Being abandoned by a parent or caregiver, or partner

Learning to trust is difficult, but over time, you can learn to trust those people who are genuinely trustworthy. Don’t be too hard on yourself. You may have a good reason for not being able to trust.

Signs your past relationships contribute to your current broken trust:

Being in a relationship reveals how you trust people. You may try to protect yourself, even if your partner is entirely trustworthy. You need to realize that your past is affecting your present-day relationships. Here are some signs that you have a hard time trusting people.

You find it hard to get close to others
You suspect of people’s motives
You’re constantly wondering if your partner or spouse is cheating on you
You have unrealistic expectations of other people
You are in intense relationships, and then they fall apart
You’ve experienced a hard time being vulnerable
You struggle with anxiety
You try to control the people around you

Final thoughts on repairing broken trust in a relationship

Trust is a foundation part of all relationships. You learn early on to trust those around you. If you experience broken trust as a child, you are likely to struggle with trust issues as an adult. Once trust is broken in a relationship, it’s possible to rebuild trust with honesty, commitment, and patience over time.

Be sure to explain to your partner what they need to do to earn back your trust. As you rebuild trust in your relationship, you will experience a more profound connection on a solid foundation.

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