Staying in an unhappy or failed relationship isn’t beneficial to either partner. Many people take relationships lightly and allow bad relationships to affect them mentally, emotionally, and physically. They stick around to avoid the uncomfortable experience of a breakup, but there are ways to end a relationship on a positive note.
While it’s good to try and save your relationship, it’s sometimes not possible. Things don’t always work out, and the relationship could continue to affect you negatively. Even if you wanted it to last forever, you must admit when it has become a heavy burden.
Ending a relationship is difficult, even when you’re the one doing it. Emotions run high when you close this chapter of your life, and it’s never easy to say goodbye. It’ll be easier if you don’t end things on a negative note, though, and things will be smoother and less harmful.
These tips can help you end your relationship on a positive note, allowing both of you to move forward. They’ll promote healing and acceptance, and it won’t be so awkward if you run into your ex later on.
Why Relationships End
Essentially, it doesn’t always matter why you want to end a romance. If you want out of the relationship or feel like your needs are unmet, that is all the reason you need. However, relationships often end for many different reasons, including these:
- Personality differences
- Lack of quality time
- Lack of positive interactions
- Low relationship satisfaction overall
Ways to End a Bad Relationship on a Positive Note
There’s no best way to end a relationship, but you can take steps to make it a little easier. Everyone is different, so you must determine which tips will work for your situation. Consider the needs and feelings of your partner, and think about their personality before you decide how to end things.
1 – Set up to End on a Positive Note by Having the Conversation in Person
Technology makes it easy to send a message to break up with someone. However, a virtual breakup will always end things negatively because it leads to shock and confusion. It can increase heartbreak because of the lack of consideration given.
Plus, virtually breaking up can make your partner think there’s a chance that things will be okay when you meet up in person. A face-to-face conversation is the best way to handle a breakup. While a secluded location is beneficial, you can choose a public place if you fear a violent reaction.
2 – Don’t Blame the Other Person
Avoid blaming your partner, and don’t accept blame, either. Instead, avoid blame altogether by accepting the situation and planning to move on. Blaming one another can lead to hatred, or it can cause you to cling to each other to prove the other wrong.
While it might be tempting, you should avoid voicing complaints that could hurt your partner’s feelings. Even if your thoughts are accurate, it’s best to let them go because it won’t help anything. Blaming one another is hurtful and can lead to fights, not allowing you to end things on a positive note.
3 – Give Genuine Reasons but Don’t Be Mean
While you don’t want to blame your partner, you must give a genuine reason. The other person should have the chance to understand why the relationship is over. It eliminates misunderstandings, helps ease heartbreak, and allows for growth.
As you give the reason, make sure you’re not being harsh. It could make the other person angry and defensive, hindering your efforts to end on a positive note. Be honest about the reason, but don’t give so much detail that it harms your partner’s self-esteem.
4 – Remember That It Isn’t Easy
There is no simple way to end a relationship, so don’t find the easy way out. No matter how you do it, there will be pain involved for both of you. Even when the relationship went south long ago, there will be hurt feelings and pain.
Remembering that it isn’t easy will give you the courage to follow your plan. Don’t linger in an unhappy relationship because it’s easier than ending things. Acknowledging the pain will prepare you for the experience and aftermath.
5 – Don’t Cave to Arguments or Protesting
Your partner might want to argue or protest the breakup, but don’t give in. If the situation surprises your partner, their arguments might be even worse. They will likely get defensive and offer reasons to stay together and try again.
While you might waver because of their arguments, remind yourself of all the reasons you need this to happen. Stay firm, and don’t cave into to their protests, or you’ll likely have to do this entire process again soon. If you don’t give in, you can both start the healing process right away, allowing things to end on a positive note.
6 – Don’t Suggest Keeping in Touch
If you want your relationship to end on a positive note, you must make a clean break. You might think it’s kind to suggest keeping in touch or staying friends, but it won’t go well. To move on from a relationship, you must both take some time away to heal.
If you continually see your ex or spend time with them, it’ll be harder to move on, worsening the pain. It might be possible to become friends again later on when you’ve both healed, but right now isn’t the time for that.
7 – Express Sympathy
You’ll likely be sad about the breakup even if you’re the one deciding to do it. Consider how you feel and say things that help you both feel better. If you feel sad about it, imagine how your soon-to-be-ex feels.
Although the relationship didn’t work out, there’s no reason to cause more pain than necessary. Show sympathy during the experience by talking about some of the good times you had together. It helps soften the blow and makes it more likely that you’ll end on a positive note.
Whatever you say, express sympathy by letting your partner know they made a positive impact on your life. Additionally, let them know that you feel sad about the situation, too, and that it isn’t what you had hoped for.
8 – Don’t Wait
The timing will never be perfect, so don’t wait around for an ideal time or situation. Instead, end the relationship as soon as you know that you will. If you wait, it’ll be harder for both of you.
When you know that your relationship is over, start taking the necessary steps to end it. You don’t need to receive permission from anyone, either, as this is your situation to handle. Trust your gut, and don’t put off the inevitable.