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Why It’s Healthy To Miss An Old Relationship (Even If You Don’t Want It Back)

October 5, 2016 by Chris Butler

Do you reflect back and miss an old relationship?

Say what?!

Why on earth would you miss Ed if you broke up six months ago? Then again, you did spend last year’s spring break in the Caribbean with him. In fact, it was the wildest time ever and you just cannot get the good times out of your head. Not to worry, lads, you can substitute ‘Ed’ for any other name. You did receive imagination as standard, after all!

Is this OK? Of course. So, where do I draw the line? The old road has too many potholes to be traveled on, which is why you left it in the first place. Therefore, getting to Miss-Him City is fine but reaching Lake Want-Him-Back further on is a no-no.

Why do you miss Ed?

The old saying goes, “Sometimes, it’s not the person you miss. It’s the feeling you had when you were with them.” Like last year’s spring break is one small example of this, you miss the sharing of everything: laughter, crying, talking, falling out, making up, making out, that late “false alarm” (phew!), and plenty of others. You may have spent years or even decades with Ed; all of this cannot and should not be forgotten, for it has helped you grow and become the person you are today.

Why It’s Healthy To Miss An Old Relationship (Even If You Don’t Want It Back)

It is natural to miss the “routine” of your old relationship. You had a certain comfort, a familiarity, a home. But not every home provides a healthy and nurturing environment. You know you deserve better; still, moving on is a struggle. That’s typical human behavior.

Learn the difference between giving up on love and letting go (in a healthy way!).

A Suggestion:

Hold a funeral in your mind and “mourn” the death of the relationship. It can be as short or long as you want, within reason. You do not want it too short not to let him go completely, nor too long to cling to the last thread of hope that you will get back together with him. Removing items that remind you of him is also important. These are props only for the lovesick, emotional hooks to reel you back. To be free from this torture, you must burn, delete, throw in the trash, and do what is necessary to release yourself. This can be part of your “ceremony” or after it. At the end of the day, they were a part of your life, but not anymore.

The Rewards for Moving On

Unlike on a laptop, there is no “undo” option for the past. Once it is done, it cannot be undone. Moving on is so painful but so rewarding. When you allow it to pass, you let a new world of dating possibilities into your life. Fred has liked you ever since you met a few years ago at the coffee shop, but you friend-zoned him for some reason. Ted keeps texting, but you “love him like a brother,” and Ned went to that concert with you just after your break-up, but it “was not the right time to start dating again.” Think Penny and Leonard of The Big Bang Theory.

Remember, the word ‘miss’ signifies this: The relationship missed the target set by you.

This ‘Stomach Vacuum’ Exercise Can Melt The Most Stubborn Belly Fat

October 5, 2016 by Power of Positivity

Stomach vacuuming? No need to worry, it does not involve taking a vacuum cleaner and sticking it to your abdomen. The only thing you will get there is an abdomen free of belly button lint!

This is actually a highly effective exercise for getting rid of belly fat. It works on the transverse abdominals, the innermost abdominal muscle at both sides of and below the better-known six-pack. This muscle group is “a significant component of the core”, according to the Wikipedia page dedicated to the muscle. In his younger bodybuilding days, Arnold Schwarzenneger has been pictured doing the stomach vacuum.

Piqued your interest, have we? Here is the stomach vacuum exercise explained.

The “Stomach Vacuum” exercise is “the easiest way to shrink your waist and melt belly fat”. Here’s how to do it:

We highly recommended that you do this without eating or drinking anything for at least an hour. After a deep five-second inhale, you bring your belly button inside towards your spinal column exhaling as you go. You hold that in for a count to between three and five, before letting go of it and breathing in again as normal. It is possible to do it standing, on all fours or lying down tummy up. You can control this particular workout by either intensity (how hard you pull in the belly button), by a range of motion (how far the belly button is pulled in), or by duration (how many pull-ins you do per set and how long each pull in lasts).

When you do the exercise, it does feel like an actual vacuum with the big exhale and hold. You may do this in conjunction with lifting objects, lifting your arms above your head, sitting down, or on its own. But the exercise by itself is the only one that is not disputed.

What else do we know about the ‘stomach vacuum’?

In yoga, it goes by the name of “Uddiyana Bandha” (UB) or abdominal lock. Authors mention UB in three important yogic texts: Hatha Yoga Pradeepika, Gheranda Samhita, and the Siva Samhita. It is said that it activates the Manipura Chakra, situated behind the belly button. It is also the centre of vitality, controlling the energy balance to heal and maintain health and, being in the position it is in, plays an important role in the function of the pancreas and digestive organs.

Blockages of this chakra could result in diabetes, blood pressure fluctuations, digestive complaints, and circulatory conditions. When energy from this chakra flows in a free manner, it will always supply the body with vitality and good health. Activating this chakra is not only the gateway to a smaller waist. But it also gives the yogi qualities like clarity, self-confidence, wisdom, knowledge, and more.

In simpler form, this practice helps to counteract a big belly by releasing the physical distress caused by the stated possible ailments and replaces them with a body that runs like clockwork healthwise. And, it strengthens the innermost abdominals. It also gives psychological benefits, along with a feelgood factor that was not as present or even unheard of in the past.

Think of it like squeezing an orange. You squeeze out all of the impurities with the help of this simple exercise. Thus, the orange, now lacking its juice, is more svelte because of the squeezing – just like your body.

Therefore, if it is good enough for the bodybuilders and the yogis among us, So why shouldn’t we all suck in that gut?

8 Hidden Things That Can Affect Your Mood

October 4, 2016 by Power of Positivity

When it comes to moods, humans go through plenty of different ones throughout the course of the day. One moment, we find ourselves sitting in traffic and getting annoyed and impatient, and the next, we make it home to find ourselves relaxed and peaceful once again. Plenty of situations and events can affect our moods, but there are a few smaller things that can alter our emotions and mindset as well.

Watch out for these lesser-known things that can affect your mood, so that you know how to deal with negative feelings the next time they strike.

8 Hidden Things That Can Affect Your Mood

1. Hanging around negative people

We often don’t think about how other people can affect our mindset and emotions, but it’s about time we start. Not only do negative people drain your precious energy, but it makes it that much harder to maintain a positive mindset when you’re surrounded by this type of energy. You may wake up one day and find that you’ve become the very thing you despise, just because of the company you keep.

Make sure you pay attention to how you feel around different people, and adjust your friendship circle accordingly.

2. Watching too many news programs

While the news can provide valuable information about current events, for the most part, news just promotes fear-mongering and dwelling on the negative. If you spend all evening catching up on the latest in the news, you will probably find yourself in a terrible mood afterwards. News programs rarely show any of the positive things happening in the world, so if you want your daily dose of negativity, make sure to tune in.

If you want to steer clear of these feelings, however, simply don’t turn your TV to the news or anything else that dwells on problems and negativity. Or, allot a certain amount of time each day to watching news, so that you don’t become exposed to too much of the toxic information that many news outlets spew.

3. Spending too much time on social media

Of course, social media sites such as Facebook and Twitter have their perks, but spending too much time on these sites can prove detrimental to your mental and physical health. Not only does social media promote laziness and lack of productivity, but it also disconnects you from others. It puts up walls between you and the rest of the world while you live in a bubble, totally uninterested and unplugged from your environment. It creates a very real barrier between people and can cause plenty of relationship problems as well. Not to mention, science backs up what we’ve thought all along: social media does more harm than good.

In a study from the University of Gothenburg in Sweden, researchers discovered that social media leaves users feeling unhappy and unsatisfied with their own lives, and this only worsened the more time they spent on these sites.

However, another study found that users who shared more of the good things happening in their lives on their social networks had an increase in happiness and self-esteem overall.

4. Disorganization

You probably already know that external clutter leads to internal clutter, and it only makes your life harder in the end. Having things scattered all over your apartment or desk means that you’ll have to take more time to find what you need, which will result in lost productivity and extra frustration.

Try to commit to cleaning your space at least a few times a week to keep it organized and free of clutter. You’ll thank yourself next time you need a pen or sheet of paper, and find it within only a few seconds of searching on your desk.

5. Staring at screens all day

This sort of ties in to point about social media, because many of us do more online than just scroll through Facebook. We spend time emailing our clients or boss, texting friends, sharing photos, looking up information, watching videos, playing Pokemon, and the list goes on. Many of us could benefit greatly from reducing our screen time and increasing time with friends, time outdoors, time for ourselves, etc.

If you experience technological overload and need a break, then make one. Commit to putting down that phone after a certain amount of time and doing other things instead. Remember the days before smartphones and computers? Of course you do. Pull out that sidewalk chalk or go down to the rope swing at the creek and have a blast. Who needs technology to have fun, anyway?

6. Staying up too late all the time

Staying up late into the night may seem fun and exciting, but it will take a toll on your health before you know it. We need sleep to survive, and many of us don’t get enough of it. Of course, there are conflicting studies out there about staying up late vs. going to bed early, but we all know that too much of something is never good. Staying up late can lead to depression, anxiety, increase in appetite, lethargy, and other pretty serious problems.

If you have a habit of staying up late, try to push your bedtime back by at least thirty minutes or an hour each night. You won’t regret it when you wake up feeling refreshed in the morning!

7. An unhealthy diet

We won’t tell you how to eat, but you want to avoid certain foods in order to have optimal mental, physical and emotional health. Eating too many fried, salty, sugary, processed, or pesticide-ridden foods will negatively affect your health in the long-run, so try to opt for whole foods as much as possible.

Our diet affects our moods more than you’d think, so try to eat like your grandparents did in the good ol’ days, before mass production took a hold of society. Pay attention to how you feel when you eat foods with fewer ingredients, and compare it to your moods and emotions when you eat a lot of unhealthy foods. You’ll likely notice a huge difference.

8. You don’t challenge yourself enough

If you don’t push yourself enough in life, you’ll fall into a state of complacency, and that can lead to stagnation. Challenges and goals serve as a way to keep us excited about life and encourage us to constantly push the limits. If we don’t continue to get better, then what are we doing with our lives? This doesn’t mean you aren’t good enough right now, but all of us could always improve on something.

Set goals for yourself regularly, and try your hardest to achieve them. Not only will this increase your mood, but it will hold you accountable for improving your life, and make you a more well-rounded, resilient person.

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

10 Things Men Should Never Tell Their Pregnant Partner

October 4, 2016 by Power of Positivity

“It is the most powerful creation to have life growing inside of you. There is no bigger gift.”

– Beyoncé Knowles

The 9 months that a woman is pregnant is an emotional Pandora’s Box. Elation, acceptance, fatigue, anticipation, sadness, and even depression often occur during pregnancy. Indeed, for many woman, pregnancy is a time of celebration; but, the three phases that make up pregnancy often bring about a number of challenges emotional and physical challenges.

As men, it is our job to be our utmost supportive and helpful during our woman’s pregnancy. First, it is essential that we are willing to understand what pregnancy entails. Second, we must use this knowledge to emotionally support our partner during a difficult time. Lastly, we need to watch the hell out…

Seriously.

Many a men have found themselves nearly castrated for saying or doing something perceptibly offensive during a woman’s pregnancy. We’re here to help with this. Don’t become castrated.

With that joyful note, here are 10 things that men should never tell their pregnant partner:

1. “You are getting big!”

Uh-huh…good luck with that, bro. This really shouldn’t have to be said: don’t comment on a woman’s body during pregnancy. Pregnancy involves a human being growing inside of an expandable womb – of course she is going to get bigger.

Just do yourself a favor and don’t say anything about it.

2. “You shouldn’t be exercising/standing up/doing anything.”

The woman is pregnant, she is not incapacitated. Your partner knows exactly what she should/shouldn’t be doing at any given time. Women have procreated for millions of years; having evolved a keen intuition concerning how/what her body is doing.

No need to advise her on this.

3. “Don’t eat (insert food here).”

This is nearly as bad as #1. Your partner is pregnant, so she needs to account for both her nutritional needs and those of the developing child. It’s perfectly normal – in fact, healthy – if she eats a bit more than she did pre-pregnancy.

Again, if you want to avoid being verbally castrated, stay away from anything involving her diet and/or food.

4. “I wish you could drink with me.”

Guess what? Your partner probably wishes she could have a cocktail or two, as well. But there’s this whole “birth defects from alcohol” thing that is preventing her from doing so. Most times, this is said with genuine intentions; we do miss enjoying the little things, like having an adult beverage, with our significant other. That said, stay away from saying this.

5. “I wish you could eat (insert food here).”

There are some foods (e.g. seafood, poultry) that women are best abstaining from while pregnant. The simple reason is that contracting food poisoning, although the risk is small, can be deadly to the developing child. She may or may not want these foods, but it’s best just to not mention them.

6. “Why is the house such a mess?”

It’s no secret that a woman’s energy is often depleted during pregnancy. It’s much, much easier to become fatigued or exhausted during pregnancy, as the body is undergoing drastic changes. This makes it more difficult to keep up with routine work both in and out of the home.

Instead, just help your partner pick up once in a while…she’ll appreciate that.

7. “Baby names? Again?”

It’s common for pregnant women to discuss baby names with their partner. Sometimes, the woman wants to discuss them quite often. There really isn’t an excuse for a man not engaging in this conversation.

For God’s sake man, she’s carrying around another human being 24/7 for 9 months…the least you can do is indulge her with some good baby names.

8. “I don’t want to shop for baby stuff.”

That’s too bad, bro, you’re going to be a dad. Get used to sharing some shopping responsibilities once in a while. We guarantee that she truly appreciates the efforts you’re making to lessening her burden during pregnancy.

If this doesn’t matter to you, then look at it this way: if you’re shopping for baby stuff, and you’ve been a good boy, maybe she’ll let you pick something out for yourself. Just sayin’.

9. “What’s taking so long?”

Ohhh, man…you’re asking for it. Hopefully, these words are never uttered from your mouth.

Can you imagine having a developing, moving child – often wreaking havoc on your body – with you, constantly, 24/7? Us men find it difficult to get moving when there’s a football game on T.V…so, we probably wouldn’t do too well carrying around another human being.

10. “You’re sleeping too much.”

This one is commonsensical. You probably don’t come close to uttering this phrase. You’re much too intelligent; understanding that a woman’s body needs to constantly recharge during pregnancy. You know that sleeping often during pregnancy is an overall health benefit for both her and the child…Right?

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

45 Year Study Reveals What It Takes to Raise Highly Intelligent Children

October 4, 2016 by Power of Positivity

In Summer of 1968, John Hopkins University (JHU) professor Julian Stanley met a 12-year old named Joseph Bates. The child grew bored of the overly simple work that his school mandated he churn out day after day. Bates, as it would turn out, was a gifted child. However, little Joseph did not receive encouragement from the staunchly-traditional education system. Indeed, the school did not recognize or cultivate intelligent students.

Joseph Bates was eventually enrolled in a computer science program at JHU – a move that the child’s parents hoped would provide an adequate challenge and proper cognitive stimulation. However, even a difficult class at one of the United States’ most prestigious universities was not enough. Eventually, the child ended up both enrolling at JHU and teaching advanced programming language to graduate students.

Observing the failure of traditional education to identify and cultivate gifted children, Stanley developed the Study of Mathematically Precocious Youth (SMPY), which would eventually revolutionize the way that gifted children are sought out and nurtured.

“I don’t know of any other study in the world that has given us such a comprehensive look at exactly how and why STEM talent develops.” – Christoph Perleth, Psychologist at the University of Rostock (Germany)

45 Year Study Reveals What It Takes to Raise Highly Intelligent Children

SMPY has been conducting childhood intelligence studies for over 45 years and is recognized as the preeminent source by many to develop the intellects of children. SMPY has produced several hundred scientifically-rigorous studies on a myriad of topics related to childhood intelligence.

Perhaps the most important work of SMPY is related to the identification and cultivation of gifted children in the areas of science, technology, engineering and mathematics, or STEM. People that have been identified by SMPY have gone forth to leave significant impacts on a variety of fields. Pioneering mathematicians Terence Tao (winner of the 2006 Fields Medal), and Lenhard Ng were involved with SMPY, as were business magnates Mark Zuckerberg and Sergey Brin. Lady Gaga was also a SMPY pupil.

What SMPY Discovered

SMPY followed the achievements of 5,000 precocious youths up to the peak of their respective careers. Researchers discovered that their subjects societal influence far outpaces those of non-subjects; namely, numerous innovators in the fields of science, technology and culture (e.g. Zuckerberg) were all supported in their early years by JHU’s Center for Talented Youth, an adjunctive entity of SMPY.

In published studies, SMBY theorizes and proves that childhood intellect has a disproportionate influence on eventual success. Here are the key findings of SMBY’s research:

Inherited intelligence is a stronger indicator of success than repeat practice or socioeconomic status.
Provided that a gifted child develops properly, they will likely make a significant impact in their chosen field of endeavor.
There exists no one single factor that can determine a person’s success; there are outliers in each intellectual tier.
Proper nurturing of gifted children is important to the future development and competitiveness of respective societies.
Gifted children can accomplish many foreign tasks, and complete work that they had no previous knowledge of (This is especially true with gifted young mathematicians).

Nurturing an intelligent child

“Setting out to raise a genius is the last thing we’d advise any parent do…(it) can lead to all sorts of social and emotional problems,” says Camilla Benbow, dean of education and human development at Vanderbilt University (which oversees SMPY initiatives).

Instead, Benbow and her talent-development researchers came up with a series of recommendations for parents of gifted children. The goal, states Benbow, is to inspire both achievement and happiness in smart children. Here are some of the points of emphasis given to parents of gifted kids.

Use labeling words such as “gifted” or “special” with precaution. Labeling a child often can lead to emotional distress.
Allow the child to experience intellectual endeavors on their own. This conveys that failure and risk is vital to the learning experience.
Focus on emphasizing effort, not innate ability. As mentioned, various factors determine someone’s relative “success,” not just inherent intelligence.
Encourage the child in intellectual areas of interest. Don’t force them to “be something” they’re not.
Collaborate with educators to plan a path. Gifted children often feel a strong sense of boredom or uncomfortable routineness with assigned work. Come up with a good, well-balanced educational plan.
Convey emotional and intellectual support. Such an approach will help with developing the child into a well-rounded person.
Expose the child to diverse experiences. Children with high intelligence often require novelty to sustain motivation.

Final thoughts on raising intelligent children

SMBY is simply one of the many entities that studies childhood intelligence. The word “intelligence” often provokes differing thoughts and emotions, and for good reason. Indeed, despite the tireless research conducted by a number of great minds, no true consensus exists as to what constitutes real “intelligence.”

This aside, we do understand that both inherent intelligence and environmental factors are influential in a child’s cognitive development. All children, regardless of innate ability, require stimulation via learning, as well as a loving and stable home environment to reach their full potential.

The fact that institutions such as SMPY and others exist ought to be encouraging. Gifted children have the potential to become tomorrow’s great scientists, artists, mathematicians, teachers, engineers, government leaders, and so on. It’s up to us to ensure the young children that make up the gifted demographic receive the nurturing and wholeheartedly embracing their intelligence.

10 Ways to Tell Your Partner You Love Them (Without Saying A Word)

October 4, 2016 by Power of Positivity

We tried to profess love without using words. Alas, everything we tried did not seem to work, thus we shall do it with their aid – so you will not need them.

Tell your partner “I Love You” (without a word) by doing any of these things…

1. Cook a meal they love

They do say that “the quickest way to a person’s heart is through their stomach,” such is the way we do not distinguish between sexes.

Even if you are no Gordon Ramsey in the kitchen, just popping their favorite food in the microwave speaks volumes about how you see your honey bunny and where you are as a couple.

2. Make sure that their clothes are clean

Unless your significant other is insignificant to you, you would want their clothes smelling fresh for the next time of use. Washing, drying, ironing, and putting them back in the closet. Fellas, sometimes you must pull your finger out in this department, too.

3. Turn on the outside light (and leave a love note) if your other half is working late

If you show this simple gesture, they don’t need to whip out their phone to know exactly where the door lock is. It also illuminates the vicinity so they are not walking into complete darkness. How depressing is it to come home to that?

And the love note? They’ll be happy to read it (and have the light to do so)…

4. Put fresh towels out for when the working day or night is done

This is very similar to #2. However, we do not usually use towels as clothes this time unless you two are all alone! Nothing says “I Love You” quite like leaving clean towels ready for when they are needed the most.

5. Designate a date night

Ensure all other distractions, including kids, pets, in-laws, meddling mothers, are out of the way. Focus on each other on your date night.

Everyone wins if you could get them together so you two love birds can enjoy some “us” time! Quality time together refreshes the relationship and allows you to do this not customarily allowed when you are not alone.

6. Wear an outfit they love to see you wear

We all love a woman/man in uniform. Her in a sexy nurse’s outfit, him in fireman’s garb. Let us get those pulses racing, the nurse’s bedside manner will see to that! The fireman will whip out his hose and put out all fires of desire, too! It is suddenly getting hot in here…

7. Give them an unexpected hug and kiss

Who does not love some unexpected sugar? This could make someone’s day, especially those hugs and kisses from behind. They do not only feel good, they are also good for our health. According to Dr. Mercola, a ten-second hug a day can “lower risk of heart disease, reduce stress, fight fatigue, boost your immune system, fight infections, ease depression.” Now imagine what kissing can do…

8. Send them a sweet text message

What exactly to send them, only you know. What we do know is that they will be made up about getting that message from you. Be as creative or as crazy as you like; they will be guaranteed to be smiling all day long and might even send something back if they get the chance.

9. Do something with them that they love doing

For him: Watch the game with him wearing his team’s colors. For her: Go to the ballet with her wearing a nice suit and Italian leather shoes. Of course, these suggestions can be changed to suit all tastes. If you go with them to do something they love, they will love you even more for it. It is a question of making an effort for your boo.

10. Be spontaneous with them (if you can)

Being spontaneous with your squeeze means you both can let your hair down and enjoy life. Taking that impromptu trip makes you love your life with them, a nice little road trip listening to your favorite songs and singing along to break the humdrum routine. At the end, you can laugh and say you cannot believe you did that. We only get one life, so enjoy living a life you love with your favorite person with you.

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

20 Things Every Man Should Stop Doing In His Relationship

October 4, 2016 by Power of Positivity

A man has two options in a relationship: Either stand up and be the man she needs or sit down, so she can see the man behind you.

Women fall in love with a man because of his character. Women also stay in love because of the man’s character. As men, our character should not change simply because we are now officially “in a relationship.” The truth is, you can lose the woman by doing so…quickly.

It is our duty, as men, to be upright and honest in everything that we do. Not just in a relationship, but outside of it. It goes without saying that your woman deserves a man with such traits of honesty and goodwill.

This article discusses 20 things a man should stop doing in a relationship. This notion assumes that you still indeed love the woman. Bearing this in mind, it is important to cease character-damaging behavior before it’s too late.

NOTE: If you want to know the actions women must stop for a successful relationship, we cover them in a separate article.

20 Things Every Man Should Stop Doing In His Relationship

1. Don’t stop getting to know your partner.

Just because you’re together don’t mean that inquisitiveness stops. Don’t become too complacent by thinking you know everything about her.

2. Don’t underestimate the importance of your partner’s work.

Whether your partner is a stay-at-home mom or a full-time office worker, don’t neglect to recognize their hard work.

3. Don’t go straight for the couch after getting home.

This is such a common behavior for us men! We have a long day and can’t wait to flop onto the soft cushions of our couch. If she’s home, give her a kiss and ask about her day.

4. Don’t put work before your partner.

Many men take it upon themselves to provide the best possible life for their partner. While this is admirable, don’t allow your work to distract you from what’s truly important.

5. Don’t pretend to be listening when you’re not.

“Uh…uh-huh…sounds good.” Meanwhile, you didn’t listen to a word that she said. Maintain eye contact, engage in conversation, and show her that you’re really good listener.

6. Don’t become a closed book.

When life gets difficult, it’s so easy for us to just shut down. But us men have to remember that someone is depending on us to be physically and mentally present.

7. Don’t critique or criticize your woman in front of others.

When there’s tension between you and her, it’s important to remain calm and collected. Don’t allow yourself to say something, especially in front of others, that you may come to regret.

8. Don’t preemptively mention “breaking up/divorce”

Breaking up is serious, and divorce even more so. These words should never be muttered in haste. Doing so can even end a salvageable relationship.

9. Don’t procrastinate with your household duties.

If it’s your responsibility to take out the garbage after dinner, do it. If you said you’d clean the garage this weekend, do it. Be a responsible man around the house.

10. Don’t forget to communicate your whereabouts.

Communication is the backbone of any relationship. When a man doesn’t clue his woman in on where he’s going or what he’s doing, it’s incredibly disrespectful.

11. Don’t purchase anything major without first discussing it.

Oh, you want that new TV? Is that new suit catching your eye? That’s cool. What isn’t cool is purchasing something costly without first discussing it with your lady.

12. Don’t hone in on other women for too long!

Beautiful women are almost irresistibly eye-catching. A first look – even a short “trail” – is natural. However, it’s probably best to check your woman-watching in front of your woman.

13. Don’t force her to make all the important decisions.

Not all decisions can be made together, for whatever reason. However, when it comes to something significant (e.g. your kids, the house), you must be willing to expend some brainpower and help with the decision.

14. Don’t react impulsively while arguing.

This one spells (unavoidable) danger. When our temper rises, we have a tendency to allow our brain to check out. This can lead to hurtful words being uttered without thinking. Allow yourself to cool down.

15. Don’t take advantage of her kindness.

One reason you probably fell in love with your woman is her sweet nature. Women can be very caring and generous; but this doesn’t give you the right to take advantage. Reciprocate kindness, as well.

16. Don’t forget to plan an evening out, on occasion.

Gosh, it just seems that we’re so busy all the time. When we’re home, it can be so tempting to want to just “Netflix and chill.” This is cool most of the time, but don’t forget to add novelty by taking her out on the town on occasion.

17. Don’t expect her to tend to your every need.

Somewhat related to #15, it is important to not anticipate her meeting your every need. As men, we must take it upon ourselves to be responsible. This means caring for ourselves, in many ways, like we did before we met her.

18. Don’t accuse her of anything without evidence.

This one is another potential backbreaker. Accusations, especially of the serious kind (e.g. cheating) can irreparably damage a relationship. Make sure you have clear evidence of the offense.

19. Don’t insult her man friends.

Odds are she probably has a male friend or acquaintance that may rub you the wrong way. You can verbalize these concerns without insulting her social circle.

20. Don’t attempt to control her.

As partners, you should both understand that time apart is both healthy and necessary. When she tries to have a night to herself, let her without becoming a master.

111 Ways to Say “I Love You” To Your Partner

October 1, 2016 by Power of Positivity

No matter how long you’ve been in a relationship with your partner, they will never get tired of hearing those three little words that mean so much. However, sometimes, you need to spice things up a bit and put a creative spin on telling your partner you love them. You can even “tell” them how you feel without actually saying a word! As they say, actions speak louder than words, so maybe this long list of ways to show your partner how you feel about them will get you inspired to sweep your lover off their feet all over again.

Life can sometimes get in the way of even the strongest relationships, so this list will help you get ideas on how to continue nurturing and growing your relationship, even when times seem tough.

111 Ways to Say “I Love You” To Your Partner

1) Send a cute text message or leave a love note in their purse or wallet before they leave for work.

2) Buy your cutie their favorite snack on your next shopping trip.

3) Make them a special dinner in the middle of the week, just because you can.

4) Learn something with your partner that they have an interest in, such as surfing or playing guitar.

5) Kiss your partner unexpectedly, like when you’re waiting in line for ice cream.

6) Bake something sweet and delicious for him/her to show you care.

7) Give him or her a compliment and watch their face light up.

Sweet Gestures That Say I Love You

8) Write him/her a poem or love letter, and leave it in the mailbox for them to find.

9) Look at old photos of you two together.

10) Write down what you love about your partner, and share it with him/her.

11) Give your partner a full body massage.

12) Take your lover on a cute date, like a picnic.

13) Buy your partner a small gift, like flowers or a candy bar.

14) Learn to love the little things about your partner that you find annoying.

15) Cuddle your partner in the mornings before work.

16) Go walk in nature together, and get lost to your heart’s content.

17) Massage your lover’s neck while they drive.

18) Give him/her a compliment in front of others.

19) Buy your love tickets to their favorite band.

20) Allow your special someone to pick where to eat next time.

Thoughtful Things to Show You Care

21) Send flowers to their workplace, along with a cute love note.

22) Call just because you can.

23) Make him/her a thoughtful homemade gift, like a hat or scarf.

24) Wash his/her car as a nice surprise.

25) Do an errand for them that they haven’t had time for lately.

26) Say something totally mushy and cute (but genuine) on your social media about them.

27) Invite him/her out with your friends for an evening.

28) Make them breakfast in bed.

29) Do something totally crazy and unordinary with them, like skydiving.

30) Forget about adulting for a day, and just spend all day with them in bed.

31) Ask them what’s on their mind, and listen.

32) Share with him/her why you chose them out of everyone else.

Creative Ways to Say I Love You

33) Write a song about them.

34) Tell your partner how cute/attractive/handsome/beautiful they are.

35) Look your partner in the eyes for a few moments, and just smile.

36) Become your partner’s workout buddy.

37) Massage his/her feet after a long day of work.

38) Clean up the house for him/her.

39) Tell your partner how beautiful their mind/soul is, and why.

40) Go to a yoga/meditation class with your partner, even if you aren’t that into it.

41) Kiss him/her on the forehead.

42) Read books in bed together.

43) Tell your lover that you believe in them.

44) Buy your SO’s favorite incense or candles.

Make Life an Adventure

45) Plan a vacation together to a place that your lover wants to go.

46) Take your lover out for breakfast one morning.

47) Plan a romantic date, but don’t tell them where you’re going. Surprise them.

48) Help them accomplish their goals, one step at a time.

48) Make a scrapbook of your favorite pics together.

49) Redecorate the house/bedroom with some of his/her favorite colors, artwork, etc.

50) Try out tantric sex together(as long as they feel comfortable first).

51) Watch his/her favorite show or movie with them.

52) Tell your partner to get in the car, and drive them to a beautiful place to spend the afternoon.

Make Your Relationship Your Top Priority

53) Put away your phone and pay complete attention to him/her.

54) Turn off all electronics for a day, and spend time talking and reconnecting to your lover.

55) Help your partner solve a problem in their life.

56) Style your partner’s hair, just for fun.

57) Make a healthy meal for him/her.

58) Encourage your lover to follow their dreams, no matter how big.

59) Burn a CD for him/her, or just make a playlist for them.

60) Listen to them with the intent to understand, not to reply.

61) Help him/her clean out their car.

62) Watch a sunrise or sunset with your lover.

63) Laugh with them.

64) Allow him or her to be vulnerable and open without judgment.

65) Pull out old boardgames to play together.

66) Watch a mind-opening documentary together, and talk about it afterwards.

67) Send him or her a funny meme or video at work.

Be Vulnerable

68) Give your mate a big, long hug.

69) Help him or her get over one of their fears, and be there every step of the way.

70) Let them finish talking completely before you reply.

71) Do a chore that they normally do, such as grocery shopping or picking up dry cleaning.

72) Ask about their day.

73) Write a love message on the back of their car.

74) Bring your partner to their favorite place.

75) Take them hiking somewhere beautiful.

The Smallest Gestures Can Say I Love You

76) Wash the laundry for him/her.

77) Choose to see only the good qualities about your partner.

78) Do something you normally would hate, but they love, such as watching a sports game together.

79) Accept him/her as they are, today.

80) Do something therapeutic together, like a massage, acupuncture, etc.

81) Choose to sit in silence together for a bit, and just enjoy each other’s company.

82) Shower or bathe together.

83) Go somewhere quiet where the two of you can just relax and bond without distractions.

84) Make a yummy meal with your man or woman.

85) Help them silence his/her biggest insecurities.

86) Work on a project together, such as cleaning the house or building a bookshelf.

87) Allow them to share their deepest thoughts without criticism or interruptions.

88) Ask your partner about their biggest dreams, and help them to reach their goals.

89) Play their favorite song in the car.

Have a Little Bit of Fun

90) Try couple’s yoga!

91) Tell jokes with your partner.

92) Surprise your lover with morning sex to get the day started on the right note!

93) Plant a long, passionate kiss on their lips unexpectedly.

94) Go stargazing with them.

95) Listen to an educational podcast or YouTube channel together.

96) Tell him/her “I love you” in public.

97) Commit to saying positive affirmations with him/her in the mornings and evenings.

98) Create a sanctuary somewhere in your home or apartment for them to retreat to on hard days.

99) Tell them how wonderful they are, just because.

100) Buy him/her a new shirt that you know they’d love.

101) Go see a concert with your lover.

102) Initiate sex by making the first move.

103) Build up your partner with kindness and encouragement.

104) Act like kids for a day and color, draw, play outside, roll around in the grass, go to a playground, etc.

105) Sit outside and enjoy the day together.

106) Look up at the clouds with your lover and figure out what shapes they make.

107) Plan a fun road trip together.

108) When something stressful happens, give them a hug until they calm down.

109) When you get angry with him/her, take a few deep breaths before you respond.

110) Take a walk in the park together, and bring a soccer ball or Frisbee for something fun to play with!

111) Learn a new sport together, and practice it often!

Do you do any of these with your partner already? Let us know in the comments below!

5 Types of Toxic Coworkers And How to Deal With Them

October 1, 2016 by Power of Positivity

Work is stressful for many people (even on a good day). Toxic coworkers can cause even more stress and frustration at work, which can lead to difficulties at home and health-related issues. As the stress takes its toll on our emotional stability and physical well-being, our productivity and happiness go down. Toxic coworkers can literally suck the life out of us if we aren’t careful. We all have them and we all have to deal with them in a professional manner.

Here are five types of toxic coworkers and how to deal with them:

1. The Politician

The Politician is obsessed with inter-office politics. They are more worried about getting the next high profile project or client than actually doing their work. They spend most of their day reminding the boss how awesome they are and talking with other employees to try and figure out what is going on and who is doing what. It is all a game to them and one they plan on winning, even if they have to back-stab and step on everyone they work with to win.

Don’t get drawn into their schemes or plots. Don’t give them any more information than you have to, as they will suck away your time asking questions about who is doing what or who is the boss’s favorite. Also, document all of your work and make sure that your work flows directly to your boss and not through the Politician. Save emails and voicemail in case you need proof that you, in fact, did the work, and not the Politician who likely wants credit for it. Be careful with emails, as the Politician will ask you to forward work to them for review while they send it on to the boss and claim credit for it.

2. The Singularity

A Singularity is also called a Black Hole. They are time suckers in that they procrastinate and wait to the last minute to complete assignments or turn in projects. They’re always in a crisis. They are negative and always have some sob story or another to share with you as to why they are late or behind schedule.

The easiest way to deal with them is to leave enough room in the schedule between the deadline you give them and the actual deadline. This way, their crisis does not become a actual crisis for you.

3. The Rumor Monger

This person is the nexus for the office rumor mill. They spend most of their day chatting with coworkers. Furthermore, they dig for juicy tidbits of personal information. They get a perverse pleasure from talking about other people. They waste everyone’s time with trivial stories about fellow coworkers that may or may not even be true. In short, they are a massive time sucker.

Don’t engage with them. They will take anything you say and spread it around the office. Unless you want information to be spread to everyone in the office, then don’t talk to this person. Anything you say will be passed on to everyone else.

4. The Slacker

This person spends more time working to avoid work than just doing their job. They’re content to let everyone else in the office pick up their slack. They don’t care what anyone thinks of them. So if they can get away with not doing anything, then they will do as little as possible. They spend a lot of time learning exactly what they can get away with and how little they can do without getting fired.

The best way to deal with them is to demand accountability and pop in to visit unannounced. Keep them on their toes so that they never know when they will be checked up on. Also, if you reward their productivity when they actually produce, you may incentivize them into better work habits without the increased supervision.

5. The Social Butterfly

This person wants to chat and goof off all day with their coworkers. They see work as a chance to socialize and hangout. They’re loud and distracting, as they are inherently charismatic and funny. They are typically immature and unprofessional and like to fan office drama for their own enjoyment. They tend to waste work time with non-work-related conversations and distract other employees.

They tend to have a lot of energy and good interpersonal skills, and if you can redirect those positive traits into work-related areas, they may become an asset. Until then, they will require a lot of supervising and redirecting them back onto the task at hand.

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