Weekly tips, affirmations, and small actions to feel your best.

Researchers Reveal How Many Hours of Sleep You Need to Be Productive

Sleep is important to your physical and mental health. Each time you don’t get enough sleep, you feel tired and low in energy. You also experience a hard time concentrating on your tasks, remembering important details, or making good choices in your day-to-day activities.

But how many hours of sleep should you get every night? Most people think that eight is the magic number that equates to better productivity the next day. But researchers from a study in the Archives of General Psychiatry learned that people who get seven hours of sleep significantly lower their health and mortality risks more so than those who get eight hours of sleep or more.

Sleep researcher Daniel Kripke also stated in an interview with Time that the most ideal number of sleep hours is from 6.5 to 7.5 a night. He also emphasized that people who exceed these hours, such as those who oversleep to nine or 10 hours, may feel even worse and more unproductive than those who only get four or five hours every night.

These studies also show that the ideal number of hours might be less important than gaining sleep quality. So, even if you regularly get less than eight hours of sleep, you may still have a productive and positive day if your rest is generally comfortable, deep, and uninterrupted.

Here’s How Many Hours Of Sleep You Need To Be Productive

“Sleep is the golden chain that binds health and our bodies together.” – Thomas Dekker

bed sleep

1.    The 8-hours-a-night requirement is a myth

In reality, the amount of sleep you need really depends on what your body requires. If you follow a lifestyle that consists of a healthy diet and regular exercise, and if you don’t have vices like smoking or drinking, then your body and mind might still be productive even if you have fewer than the ideal hours resting.

Understand that the amount of sleep you get at night might be different than the amount you need to function well. If you can perform your tasks and work well even with just six hours of shuteye, it doesn’t mean that you will operate a lot better if you get two hours more in bed.

Sleep expert Dr. Neil Stanley told The Independent that getting eight hours of sleep is not the norm. Additionally, not every person needs that many hours of rest. Instead, you have to listen to your body for the cues. If you’re tired and falling asleep while at work, that says a lot about the quality of your rest from the previous night.

2.    Watch out for these signs to tell if you’re really sleep deprived

Your body gives off a lot of signs when you are sleep deprived.

  • Apart from feeling tired in the middle of the day, you may already be suffering from sleep problems if you find it extra hard to get out of bed in the morning, need multiple cups of coffee to get through the day, or feel drowsy after a heavy lunch.
  • If you easily fall asleep when you’re watching TV at night, or if you have the need to snooze late into the morning during the weekends, you could also be sleep deprived.
  • If you have been skimping on the quality of your sleep far too long then you might not even realize that you already have a sleep problem.
  • It’s easy to disregard the signs if you think that the meeting you had was just boring or bland, so you got sleepy.

3.    Your sleep hours do change

Kripke also said that the number of hours your body needs to rest can change depending on the state of your body.

  • If you are sick, you might need more than eight hours of rest so that your body’s immunity can be boosted to fight any bacterial or viral infection.
  • If you’ve had a long or physically active day, it’s also normal for your body to demand more sleep hours at night so you could wake up refreshed and ready to be productive the next day.

However, a change in your body’s required hours sleeping is different from inconsistent or irregular sleep. The latter do impact your cognitive abilities and productivity, as per a study in the Scientific Reports.

Researchers observed the sleep patterns in a group of students from Harvard for a month. All the students in the study had similar total hours of sleep but the findings showed that those who maintained a regular sleeping schedule had better academic performance than those who slept at different times of the day or night.

This other group’s irregular sleeping patterns affected how their internal body clock functioned, which in turn affected their productivity.

4.    You can actually reset your body clock to maintain a better sleep schedule

Did you know that your body can easily adjust to a new sleep schedule? You can reset your body clock if you are experiencing a disruptive sleeping pattern that’s also affecting your chance to gain hours of sleep for productivity.

The human body follows a 24-hour cycle, known as the circadian rhythm, which takes cues from the light. This rhythm determines the time you sleep and wake up. However, there might be unavoidable circumstances when this rhythm becomes disrupted, such as when you travel to a different time zone or have a job with changing schedules.

It’s normal to feel groggy and out of the loop if your rhythm is thrown off but you can get it back on track within a few days by adopting a new sleeping pattern. According to researchers from Canada, whose work appears in the journal Nature Neuroscience, the human body also has a molecular switch that may synchronize and put order back to your body clock.

So, if you are used to working during the graveyard shift but you’re now assigned to a daytime schedule, expect to experience struggles with sleeping and low productivity. However, this setback is only temporary as your body learns to adjust.

  • One way to put your circadian rhythms back in order is to manipulate your exposure to light.
  • When you wake up in the morning, open your windows wide to let the light in.
  • When you settle down for the night, dim the lights, lower the shades, and remove devices in your bedroom.
  • The lights from the screen of your tablets and mobile phones also impact your circadian rhythms.

5.    Try to follow a sleep routine to create positive habits for productivity

When you stick to a nightly routine, you develop good habits that can impact your sleep quality. This will, in turn, affect your productivity.

For instance, you might find it beneficial to have a 20-minute walk around your neighborhood two hours before your bedtime. Walking can help clear your head so you won’t toss and turn at night. Walking will also pump up your heart, priming you to go to bed as soon as you switch off the lights.

Other routines might include reading a good book or taking a relaxing bath before you go to bed. In the morning, you can also train your body to follow a consistent time for waking up. But if you’re always hitting the snooze button and oversleeping, you should look for a different nighttime routine.

6.    You can take naps every day to re-energize your brain to be more productive

The experts also recommend napping as a coping mechanism if a lack of sleep is affecting your productivity. By allowing yourself 20 minutes of nap time, you can re-energize brain.

It might help if you know when your body crashes and your productivity dives. Many people feel their energy levels dropping around 1 to 3 p.m. If this is the same for you, try to take short naps during this space of time every day.  However, it is also important that you don’t nap for more than 30 minutes. Why? This will have an impact on your ability to get a good night’s rest later on.

NASA pilots who take measured and controlled 26-minute naps log a 34-percent improvement in their performance. The National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB) also recommends that air traffic controllers take 26-minute nap breaks. This increases these workers’ alertness by 54 percent.

7.    Sleep-ins won’t help productivity, as you cannot make up lost sleep

Some people go to bed too late one night and then “recover” the next day by making up the hours of sleep they’ve lost. However, there is a such a thing as a sleep debt as per Harvard Health, which accumulates when you keep failing to follow your bedtime routine and schedule.

sleep

Making up lost sleep won’t bring the same positive effects to your productivity compared to getting regular, quality rest.

  • If you’re not generally sleeping well every day, your mind misses out on the benefits of the Rapid Eye Movement (REM) state.
  • This is a phase your brain goes through every time you fall into a deep rest.
  • REM consolidates your memories and restores your brain cells. REM stimulates the parts of your brain connected to learning, processing information, and storing knowledge.
  • It helps retain your sharpness and cognitive ability.

So, while sleeping in may bring positive effects, it’s not a healthy habit to adopt in your lifestyle. It’s still best to follow a consistent routine and solid schedule for going to bed and waking up. Choose this over setting aside days to pay off your sleep debt.

Final Thoughts On How Many Hours Of Sleep You Need To Be Productive

Poor sleep quality costs the U.S. economy $411 billion a year because of unproductive workers, as per The Lancet Journal. The study showed that companies and businesses lose when employees show up late, skip work, or fall ill because of sleep deprivation. Even if they do show up for work, they are either unable to focus or do their job well.

The positive thing about sleep and productivity, however, is that these problems can be corrected and improved. When a good night’s rest is matched with healthy lifestyle habits, you’ll experience better memory and decision-making skills. You’ll also enjoy a smooth creative flow, fewer mistakes at work, and less risks of burnout from your job.

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

10 Signs You’re Underestimating Yourself

What does it mean to underestimate yourself?

Put simply, one who underestimates themselves believes that they’re not enough. Underestimating yourself is the antonym of overestimating yourself – a.k.a. having over-confidence.

Underestimate:  “to estimate something to be smaller or less important than it actually is.” Synonyms: lowball, underappreciate, underrate, undervalue ~ Oxford University Press (source)

Besides underestimating ourselves, we can underestimate others. Relationships in which one person is known to minimize the other include bosses and subordinates, teachers and students, and, perhaps most sadly, parents and children.

People may undervalue any number of attributes, including their abilities, capabilities, compassion, inner-strength, intelligence, and self-worth (i.e. what they “bring to the table.”) Underestimation of oneself can result in a lifetime of diminished confidence and stress – sometimes even developing into mental health disorders, including anxiety and depression. (1)

What causes someone to underestimate themselves?

“You underestimate yourself because you lack faith in yourself. Each human has the potential to do something great and magical in their life, but it is only possible when one believes in themselves.” – ‘Jill C.’ on Quora

As to why a person underestimates themselves, reasons vary. Psychologists commonly trace the origin of low adult self-esteem to:

  • An abusive or dysfunctional childhood (including being the victim of bullying)
  • Financial difficulties
  • Dissolution of a relationship
  • Environmental stressors
  • Other negative life events

The simple fact is that life often does not go the way we want or expect. Worse, we struggle to “find” the “answer” to life’s problems. Indeed, it is entirely possible to perpetually wade in the confusing undertow of existence – suffering much in the process.

What are the effects of underestimating yourself?

A sense of worthlessness often accompanies the tendency to underestimate oneself. When people lose any sense of self-worth, they are at their most vulnerable. When a person reaches such depths, they often grow desperate to escape the negative and ruminating thoughts that seem to take over the mind.

For example, numerous studies link a low sense of self-worth with alcoholism. In a 283-person study published in the journal Addict Health, researchers found that low self-esteem correlates with poor choices and acts of self-harm, including addiction, prostitution, and theft. (2)

Low self-worth brought about by underestimating oneself may make a person more prone to suicide. It is believed that the adverse emotions brought on by low self-esteem – including depressive symptoms and hopelessness – are primarily responsible for the increased risk of suicide.

Are you underestimating yourself?

First, let us distinguish between humility and modesty and underestimation. The former is a set of personality traits; these traits are generally labeled as positive. The latter is potentially damaging psychologically – and not to be welcomed.

Second, it is essential to fully acknowledge and understand that having pride in your abilities and hard work is not a bad thing. In fact, these attributes help to build confidence and strength in oneself. We all know that price – taken to excess – is not a positive. Fortunately, very few of us have this problem!

Lastly, it entirely possible to subtly underestimate yourself. We discuss some of the ways in which we do so shortly. You may also underestimate the importance of specific activities and frames of mind – all of which allow you to be the best version of yourself. These too are mentioned.

So, what are possible signs that you’re underestimating yourself? Here are ten:

10 Signs You are Underestimating Yourself

1. You always compare yourself to others

Let’s get one thing straight: competitiveness is not necessary for growth. An unhealthy attitude of hyper-competitiveness has, for some inexplicable reason, taken hold in most of modern society.

Now, competition can be a good thing for some people – and in the right circumstances. Scholastic, sports, and fitness competitions, for example, can motivate some to fulfill their potential – and make themselves a better, happier, and more satisfied person in the process.

But constantly gauging how you “measure up” against everyone else is extremely unhealthy. There is only one individual with whom to compare yourself – and that’s, you guessed it, yourself!

2. You are a “people-pleaser.”

People-pleasing is one of the most ubiquitous signs of underestimating yourself. You people-please because you want people to “like you,” thinking that by doing what they want, they will accept you. In other words, you don’t believe you are good enough on your own merits.

Not only does people-pleasing not work (see: high school), it can lead you down the path of indentured servitude. Be the best version of yourself – and you will never have to worry about pleasing others ever again.

3. You have toxic relationships

People who have tendencies toward people-pleasing often also remain in toxic relationships. Why do people do stay in the company of bad characters? Because that’s who they think they deserve. Maybe you have a similar story in your family: the super-smart kid who, out of a desperate need for acceptance, gets in with the wrong crowd, grows up and does the same thing in adulthood.

The old adages “You are the company you keep” and “Birds of a feather flock together” are as true today as ever. Spend your time with positive people who genuinely value the same things you do.

4. You don’t stimulate your brain

Speaking of adages, here’s another: “The mind is a terrible thing to waste.”  How true, how true. Consider this: the average American watches 35.5 hours of television per week. We spend nearly as much time plopped in front of the tube as we do working a full-time job!

It goes without saying that television isn’t the best thing for your brain. This is particularly true for children. Scientists have linked prolonged television watching to antisocial behavior, lower verbal intelligence, and altered brain structure. (3)

5. You have no routine

Okay, so this isn’t saying that you need to plan your life down to the minute – but you should have some idea as to where your time is going. It is true that those who don’t manage their time are managed by it – and you can ill afford to waste your most precious resource.

People who underestimate themselves often under- or overestimate the time they have left. Instead, find a middle ground. Also, allocate some time to those things that will allow you to grow as a person.

6. You don’t eat properly

Nutrients from food fuels the body and brain. When we are underestimating the importance of food, we are setting ourselves up to fail. We are undervaluing our physical and mental capabilities. Moreover, the fatigue that we encounter when we don’t eat right makes it easier to fall back into unproductive, unhealthy habits.

To rectify these nutritional inadequacies, focus on getting most of your food from fruits, vegetables, and whole grains. Keep the consumption of red meat to a minimum – instead opting for organic poultry and fatty fish.

7. You’re overly anxious in social situations

People with social anxiety experience a profound feeling of anxiety and fear in social situations. A conditioned, intense anxiety or fear may leave the individual feeling as if they’re being watched, looked down upon, or negatively evaluated in either a performance or social situation.

It’s safe to assume that some level of unworthiness underpins the neural mechanisms producing social anxiety. Research shows that other environmental and genetic factors may also contribute to the disorder.

8. You’ve been bullied

Research shows that the effects of bullying persist into adulthood. Per a study conducted by Duke University Medical Center, victims of childhood bullying are more likely to experience anxiety, depression, and suicidal ideation. Victims are also at an increased risk of developing disorders such as panic attacks and agoraphobia (fear of open spaces).

Bullying has profoundly adverse effects on self-image and self-worth that can last into adulthood. It is therefore not unusual that the person often undervalues and underestimates themselves as a result.

9. You are a chronic settler

If you underestimate yourself, you’ve probably have had one or more people tell you that you’re not living up to your potential. It’s also probable that you’ve settled for jobs and relationships that can be considered “beneath” you. (Whether you agree with such a sentiment is an entirely different matter.)

The point here is that people who undervalue their talents and abilities often find themselves in life situations that don’t satisfy the core of who they truly are. This deep dissatisfaction indicates you may be underestimating yourself!

self esteem

  1. You feel the need to over-explain

This last one is sort of related to people-pleasing. If you feel the innate need to over-explain things, you are likely underestimating some aspect of yourself. You may also feel misunderstood and think that explaining more should clear up confusion. Unfortunately, these added details often only further cloud the situation.

Final Thoughts on Signs You’re Underestimating Yourself

“[E]verything can be taken from a man but one thing; the last of the human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” – Viktor Frankl, psychiatrist, and Holocaust survivor                                    

It is human nature to doubt yourself at times. We all do it – and we needn’t beat ourselves up over it. It is when this negative self-image, this underestimation of yourself, becomes the mind’s default state where troubles arise.

You deserve to live a life of contentment and fulfillment. No matter what is going on in your life, always remember that you are enough. You need not convince anyone but yourself of this pertinent fact.

Psychologists Explain 4 Reasons to Embrace Your Darkest Self

We talk a lot about positive thinking on our site, but what you may not know is that it’s equally important to embrace negativity as well. As the quote above says, you cannot have light without darkness. So, in order to accept both sides of yourself, you need to get to know them both very well.

Embracing your darkest self doesn’t mean you have to wallow in negativity and lose sight of what makes you shine; it just means you need to understand it better. In this world, we often put on a mask for others because society tells us what it acceptable. You might hear people say, “Smile more!” or “What’s wrong?” if you don’t look happy 24/7. Of course, many people also put on a happy face for others because showing negative emotions is largely looked down upon in our society.

This alone might be contributing to the anxiety and depression epidemic because people feel that they cannot show other sides of themselves. We have to put on so many masks for others that we can start to lose sight of who we really are. Embracing your darkest self will help you tap into parts of yourself that might have been “asleep” before and allow you to release judgement about negative emotions.

In this article, we’ll go over some reasons why going to the dark side (at least for a bit) may not be so bad after all.

Here are 4 reasons to embrace your darkest self:

“In order for the light to shine so brightly, the darkness must be present.” – Francis Bacon

1. It can benefit your mental health.

Acceptance is so important, especially in today’s world where we are bombarded with messages about who we should be. Advertisements, social media, and even our peers and family give us input about what we should buy, what we should be, what we should eat, and everything in between. So, to cut through all the noise in the outside world, you need to have a firm grasp of who you are.

Most people are easily influenced and get lost in this world because they aren’t centered; instead, they are swayed by the crowds and forget their true essence.

One study by psychologist professor Brett Ford actually found that acceptance of your darkest emotions can boost your mental health. According to Ford, “Acceptance involves not trying to change how we are feeling, but staying in touch with your feelings and taking them for what they are.” We are told to always remain positive, but human nature just doesn’t allow for that. As complex beings, we go through a myriad of emotions every day, and it’s time to start embracing that rather than denying our true selves.

The Study

In the study, researchers found that acceptance works across the board; it doesn’t discriminate based on race, socioeconomic status, or any other category. People of varying backgrounds had positive results when using acceptance to manage their emotions. Acceptance of your darkest self can mean using this method whether it’s during the hardest of times or simply for slight inconveniences.

For example, if someone close to you passed away, you can utilize acceptance to help you move through those dark emotions rather than pushing them down and bottling them up. On a lighter note, you can go back to acceptance if someone cut you off in traffic when you’re already running late. Acceptance works for a variety of situations, because in all instances, it teaches you to embrace what is happening rather than fighting it.

Ford added that acceptance plays the most important part in the act of mindfulness. She says it is linked with better mental health more than other teachings of mindfulness such as non-reactivity and observing. She says, “Acceptance, non-judging acceptance, seems to be the key ingredient to mindfulness.”

Three Tests of Acceptance

The study involved three different experiments that studied people’s emotions in various situations.

In the first part, questionnaires were sent to 1,000 undergrad students. The questions centered around mental health and emotional stability. The results, unsurprisingly, showed that students who practiced acceptance had fewer negative emotions and greater well-being.

In the next study, 156 people had to give a three-minute speech as part of a pretend job interview. The ones who practiced acceptance seemed to do much better than the ones who didn’t.

More than half of the participants chosen for this study had experienced a major stress in recent months. For the final study, the researchers asked 222 to keep a diary of the most stressful events that had occurred in the last two weeks.

Once again, the participants who practiced acceptance fared much better in this study. They seemed to take the stressful events in stride and were able to cope with all the situations they faced.

Now that you know how acceptance of your emotions can improve your mental health, we’ll move on to other reasons why acceptance is beneficial to you.

2. It helps you remain in the moment.

Accepting all your emotions – even those parts of your darkest self – means facing them rather than running from them. As you become more open to acceptance, you’ll notice that you remain more rooted in the present moment. You will open new doors to yourself and your emotions, which will deepen your experiences in life. Accepting the good, bad, and ugly emotions will also help you relate to others better, which can richen your relations with people.

Most people never stay in the moment due to ruminating about the past or future too much. Accepting your emotions can help you remain in the now. There are other factors to mindfulness, of course, but acceptance is a perfect way to start.

If something bad happens, acceptance will help you to move through the problem with greater mental focus and understanding. Acceptance allows you to understand your negative emotions on a deeper level and face a problem head-on rather than hiding from it.

3. You’ll get to know yourself better.

Most people live in denial of their true selves, or simply don’t take the time to truly know themselves. This can lead to a feeling of disconnectedness throughout your life, which means you won’t really be living at all. To live fully, you must accept and embrace all sides of yourself, which requires self-reflection and solitude. Being alone doesn’t have to feel lonely. In fact, it can be utterly liberating!

When you embrace your darkest self, you begin to understand your strengths and weaknesses much better. We all have darkness within us, but opening that door doesn’t mean you have to let that side of you take over. It simply means that part of you will no longer live dormant and misunderstood.

Freeing your darkest emotions will allow you to step into yourself more wholly and live life to the fullest. We should not be afraid of negative emotions, for they shape us just as much as the positive ones.

4. It will increase your self-compassion.

Being nonjudgmental toward ourselves is key when it comes to acceptance. Many of us are far too hard on ourselves in this life, which can lead to self-hatred and destructive behaviors. Compassion toward ourselves can help us have sympathy for the human condition, because none of us is perfect.

We all have flaws despite our greatest efforts to reach perfection.

So, increasing awareness and acceptance of yourself will lead to a more compassionate stance toward yourself and others. We have beat ourselves down too long in this life; it’s time to do the opposite and see the beautiful things that unfold from doing so. Self-compassion goes hand-in-hand with acceptance. In embracing yourself, you will start to view yourself as a friend rather than enemy.

darkest self

Self-compassion simply means treating yourself as you would want a friend to treat you. It means embracing the fact that you will make mistakes and fail in life, but this doesn’t make you unlovable or unsuccessful. Compassion means accepting that you are human, too, and deserve your love and affection as much as anyone else.

Final thoughts on Embracing Your Darkest Self

As you can see, accepting your darkest self can greatly benefit your well-being. Not only can it boost your mental health, but it can keep you rooted in the present, allow you to understand yourself better, and increase compassion toward yourself and others. Acceptance of darkness doesn’t mean you have to shun the light. It simply means embracing both sides of yourself and accepting that human nature requires these two opposing parts.

Acceptance will allow you to live life more deeply and have a greater understanding about your place in it. Getting to know your dark side might seem scary, but it’s vital to your human experience. Without delving in to your true nature, you won’t be able to fully understand yourself, which will in turn affect your understanding of others.

Introspection is becoming a lost art, but it’s so important to our journeys as it helps us remove all the chatter and truly find ourselves.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWkzCo0h0Ok

Suffering From Insomnia : 21 Things To Do When You Can’t Sleep (Science Backed Tips)

Insomnia has become pandemic. “Why can’t I sleep!” is the 2 a.m. cry of frustration and desperation from millions of bedrooms around the globe. How can you change your lifestyle or bedtime habits to relieve your own insomnia symptoms and remove your name from the list of sufferers?

No one enjoys the results of missed sleep, even for only one night. For those who suffer sleeplessness on a regular basis, there is ever-growing hope for finding a natural solution. If you are searching for relief from persistent insomnia without prescribed medications, there are a variety of ways to make a good start.

There’s a long list of do’s and don’t’s to consider. Insomnia can be caused by what you do, what you eat, and even your sleeping environment. Insomnia symptoms may be greatly reduced by changing only one or two bedtime habits, or it may require a major lifestyle commitment to alleviate the causes of sleeplessness.

Let’s consider 21 activities or habit changes that could cure your insomnia.

Relax to ease your restlessness

bed sleep

1. Allow time to wind down.

Give yourself at least 30 minutes to take control of your thoughts and calm your body for sleep. Dim the lights. Create a bedtime routine that helps you shift gears from the activities of the day to rest. Prepare yourself mentally to lie down and relax.

2. Breathe.

Alleviate insomnia symptoms with deep breathing exercises to slow your metabolism and calm your thinking and emotions. Purposely slow your breathing with deep, cleansing breaths. Research different breathing exercises to find which ones will best help you relax.[1]

3. Read a book.

Avoid heavy reading, but choose something enjoyable that can help put your mind at ease (and no ebooks, either). Read good, old-fashioned paper books. The artificial light emitted by electronic devices will not help your psyche know it’s bedtime. Light or inspirational reading will help your mind relax and focus on positive thoughts.

4. Journaling

Many experts verify the benefits of taking 10-20 minutes to chronicle the positives of the day. Write things you are thankful for or what you enjoyed. Don’t underestimate the power of the little things to help change your perspective and end the day on an upbeat note.[2]

5. Think happy thoughts.

That’s right. Go to your happy place. Picture your favorite scenery or the face of a loved one. Dwell on people, places, or activities that you enjoy. Focus on the moment, not on the long list of goals you must reach tomorrow. A good night’s sleep will get those creative juices flowing when you need them.

Watch What You Eat and Drink if You Have Insomnia

6. Avoid heavy meals.

Evening meals heavy in carbs are not a good idea if you want a good night sleep. Try to eat a light dinner at least four hours before bedtime. Also, avoid spicy foods or foods that you know may upset your stomach.

7. Avoid caffeine and alcohol.

If you are a habitual coffee drinker, enjoy your last cup at least 4-6 hours before bedtime.[3] The stimulant effects of caffeine need to be well out of your system before you try to sleep. Also, although alcohol may seem relaxing, it can lead to waking during the night. Cigarettes should also be avoided too close to bedtime, as nicotine can also be disruptive to sleep patterns.

8. Try a soothing drink.

A relaxing herbal drink, such as chamomile tea, may help you begin to relax. There are several alternatives to coffee which can help soothe and relax you at bedtime. However, you need to limit fluid intake in order to avoid being awakened by the need to go to the bathroom.

9. Bedtime snacks.

We all get those cravings for a bedtime snack. If you feel in need of a treat, choose a healthful snack that will help to satisfy your cravings while aiding your body’s ability to sleep better. When you do snack, do so wisely and at least 45 minutes before bedtime.

10. Try natural supplements.

Along with herbal remedies, there are a number of natural supplements which have been shown to calm the brain’s activity while promoting the production of helpful hormones. For example, adding a recommended dose of melatonin or magnesium to your evening routine may help you achieve a deeper, more effective night’s sleep.[4]

Create a Restful Sleep Environment if You Have Insomnia

11. Turn off electronic devices.

To your brain, the blue light produced by PCs and tablets is similar to sitting in bright daylight. So turn off TVs, laptops, and other electronic devices. Darken the space where you sleep as much as possible. The brain is programmed to recognize darkness as the time for rest.

12. No working in bed!

Don’t bring work projects into your sleeping environment, where they may contribute to stress and make it difficult to slow down your thinking processes. Make your bedroom a safe zone, where the deadlines and demands of the workplace are not allowed to worry you. If you are a person prone to many projects, give them an area of their own outside of your sleeping space.

13. Control your pets.

This is a tough one. You love your pets, but if they are keeping you from sleeping well with their nocturnal activities, it’s time to address the issue. If necessary, you may have to move your pets to separate sleeping quarters. Or maybe other family members would be less disturbed by the movement of your animal friend.

14. Try aromatherapy.

For some, a calming, pleasant aroma can bring almost instantaneous relaxation. Certain odors have been found to help settle brain activity so sleep comes easier. If you decide to try this method, make sure your bedroom is well ventilated and there is no danger of fire.

15. Plants.

Certain plants, such as aloe vera or snake plants, are known for their ability to increase oxygen levels, relax brain activity, and even remove toxins or allergens from the air. Many of these healthful plants are easy to grow, but if you have a green thumb, you may decide to experiment with some of the more exotic, air purifying plants.

16. Adjust room temperature.

For a more comfortable night’s sleep, a bedroom temperature of between 60-75 degrees Fahrenheit is recommended. Your body’s temperature fluctuates during sleep, and a cooler temperature is more conducive to deep rest. An overly warm room lowers the comfort level for your body during the sleep cycle.

Establish a Bedtime Routine.

17. Schedule your sleep time.

Besides demanding a winding down period each evening, set both a bedtime and wake-up time for each day. You can program your brain to know when it’s time to start gearing down for rest. Keeping a regular sleep schedule can eliminate many of the causes of insomnia.

18. Daily exercise.

Maintaining some kind of daily exercise routine can greatly increase your chances for a deeper, more restful sleep. It’s better to exercise early in the day, but if that’s not possible, just include some physical activity some time during each day. Our bodies were made to move, so using up that excess energy will give your body even more reason to recover during sleep.

insomnia

19. Avoid naps.

Avoid taking naps if at all if possible, and never nap late in the afternoon. If you begin to feel overly tired, try a power nap of about 20 minutes early in the day. Too much sleep during the day can lead to insomnia symptoms during the night.

20. Get comfortable.

A comfortable mattress and pillow can make all the difference between sleep and insomnia symptoms. A mattress and pillow that will adequately support you in the position you most often sleep are worth the investment. If you are able to, adjust your sleep position to one that will help achieve optimum sleep.

21. Allow the right amount of sleep time.

Either too little or too much sleep can be detrimental to your health. How much sleep is needed depends a great deal on your age. Studies show adults between 18-65 years old require 7-9 hours of sleep per night, so make sure you allow this amount of time in your daily routine.

Final Thoughts on Coping with Insomnia

Insomnia affects every part of the body, every kind of tissue, and every internal system. Although it may seem that you relax into sleep, your mind and body are actually quite active during this time. Researchers agree there’s still a lot to learn about what happens during sleep and why it’s so important to the mind and body, but the detriments of insomnia are easy to see and miserable to experience.

If you are struggling with insomnia symptoms, don’t ignore them. If it seems you have tried everything and you still can’t sleep, don’t hesitate to contact your doctor or a sleep specialist for further help. These experts may have more suggestions to fit your particular situation.

Insomnia is a serious disorder. For your own well-being and quality of life, don’t let the condition continue unaddressed. Help is out there, so relax. It’s time for a good night’s sleep.

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

10 Things I Did To Pay Off All My Debt In Just 1 Year (Earning Money Online Is One Of Them)

Are you struggling with debt? If yes, then listing your debts, laddering them, saving, learning how to earn money online, and using other strategies can make you debt free.

Here are ten things I did to pay off my debt in just one year:

 Listing Debts by Interest Rate

When paying bills gets tough, you might be tempted to stash them away. However, the essential key to clearing your debt is identifying your position. Get all your bills and debts and make a list of the smallest to the largest ones. Then, organize the list by the debts with the most interest to the ones with the least interest. Because the debt with the most interest is incurring more cost, you want to start clearing it first. Once you have your complete list of debts with their interest rates, you will be aware of what you must tackle to be debt-free.

Ladder Your Debts

After listing your debts from the one with the highest rate of interest to the one with the lowest rate of interest, start with the one with the highest rate of interest. Pay off the most you can and once you are through, pay a similar amount to the next debt with the most interest and so on. This will save you a lot of money, and after debts begin disappearing from the list, you will achieve more momentum.

Get an Emergency Saving Fund

Since emergencies can occur, you must prepare for them. However, saving up for an emergency should not delay your plan to clear your debts. Prior to clearing your debts, create a small emergency fund of $1000 or more for unexpected costs like medical bills, car repair, or more. This can be cash you can use when something random comes up. In case there is an emergency and you use the money, top it up before resuming debt payment. However, remember to keep paying your minimum debt payments as you top up your fund to ensure you don’t face costly penalties.

According to experts at Crediful, credit cards typically have high rates of interest. Therefore, if you use your credit card to cater to an emergency, you will end up in more debt. The more the debt you get into, the more months it will take you to clear it, and the more debt you will pay due to higher interest rates. Additionally, you will ruin your credit score.

Keep in mind that an emergency fund includes money that needs to be easily and quickly accessible once there is an emergency. You need to keep it in a safe place like a savings account. The money won’t grow much, but accessing it will be easy and it will always be there if you need it.

Make Minimum Monthly Payments

You must always ensure you meet minimum monthly payments on your debt to avoid incurring late fees and higher interest rates. The ideal way to be on par with monthly card payments is to use the closing date of the card as opposed to the due date of the payment. The closing date completes your monthly bill, and any payment after this date is part of the following month’s statement. The closing date of your card is on the statement.

The report of the card’s balance at the closing date is usually sent to the credit bureau. Hence, if you clear the balance prior to that date, your balance will be zero on your statement. This will assist you in avoiding late fees and higher interest rates in addition to improving your credit score. Check out this website, creditrewardperks.com, and learn about the best credit card rewards.

Make a Budget and Eradicate Any Extraneous Things

Coming up with a budget is an excellent idea of staying on top of your expenses. As much as budgeting might make you feel broke, it is a way of directing the destination of your money.

An ideal starting point is to acquire your previous month’s expenses from a credit card or bank statement. Use an Excel spreadsheet or a paper budget to organize your expenses. Also, use an app such as Mint to budget your costs. You will need to come up with categories for every expense to create a limit to that expense and indicate your income. Ensure that your income always exceeds your budget. In case it happens, consider cutting some items from the budget.

If it becomes hard to use a computer or paper to budget, you could go for the envelope method. This is a traditional money management method that some people still use to control their spending. In this method, you make payments in cash for every expense you can, using envelopes to hold the money and maintain the budget.

Downsizing Temporarily

Paying off debt does not happen forever. It is a delayed gratification that will enable you to enjoy a life free of debt. Look at the expenses of your previous month and look for things that are not essentials. It could be eating out, entertainment, monthly subscription services, and so on. Do away with these expenses temporarily and then use the savings to clear out more debt.

Increase Your Income

After organizing your debts and creating a budget, the next step is to increase your income. You can do this by looking for a higher paying job. You can also apply for more senior positions at your current company. Additionally, you can acquire a second job so that you can make more money. You can also look into how to earn money online.

Getting a promotion or another job might take a while or prove difficult. But, do you know how to earn money online by utilizing a skill you have? If you are an application programmer or a web designer, there are many clients online looking for someone with your particular set of skills. Registering on sites like Fiver and creating an appealing profile can aid you in landing clients who are willing to pay for your talent, and this will enable you to earn money online.

You don’t need to be a web designer or an app developer to earn money online. There are jobs for hundreds of skills. 20% of the US population is working in the freelance economy with people working remotely. You can be a graphic designer, project manager, writer, or personal assistant, and there are many more ways to earn money online. If you don’t have any skills, you can learn a skill of your interest online in under two weeks and earn money online.

Transferring Balances

If you are incurring high-interest rates, transfer your balances to save and clear your debt. Make sure your minimum payments are met and your balance is cleared prior to the expiry of the introductory interest rate. Otherwise, it will result in late fees and higher interest rates.

In case you have a challenge meeting your balances as well as the minimum payments, contact the Consumer Credit Counselling Service. They offer credit counseling for free together with debt management service at the cost of 3 to 5 percent per month without exceeding $50, depending on the state.

Rewarding Oneself for Small Victories

The debt payment process need not be a chore, and you can make it fun while you do it. Make a game out of it and offer yourself a reward whenever you hit a milestone like clearing one debt off your list.

Each time you clear a debt, celebrate with something you like to do. These can include going to the movies, going out for coffee, buying some ice-cream, or anything that can be managed within your budget. This will motivate you to keep paying off your debt.

Selling Unnecessary Items to Earn Money Online

Look around your home searching for anything that is using unnecessary space because you don’t need it. It could be some massive furniture eating up your space that you can sell off to clear your debt with the money and reduce your financial obligations. You could initiate a garage sale or earn money online by selling things on Facebook, eBay, Craigslist, and other sites.

earn money online

eBay is the top site for selling things to earn money online. This popular online marketplace has been the best in enabling the sale of used items since the 1990s. You start by creating an account, listing your things to be sold, and uploading pictures of the items. The site offers you access to more than 160 million people. However, eBay will cost you $0.3 to list an item and 10 percent of the sale of each item.

Bonanza is another retail merchandising site where you can list your used merchandise for sale. Its structure resembles eBay but with a lower list cost. You will incur a charge of 3.5 percent of the value of items below $500. If over $500, it will cost you $17.5 plus 1.5% of the sale. You can also link your items on this site to Google shopping.

You can also earn money online by selling items through Etsy. This site specializes in the sale of handcrafted merchandise and used things that are twenty years old or more. These goods are referred to as vintage, and if you have such items, you can sell them on this site for quick money. You incur a cost of $0.2 to list and 3.5% of the sale as well as $0.25 and 3% for processing of the payment. The site has 22.6 million shoppers that can be potential clients for your vintage or handmade items. If you were wondering about how to earn money online, this is it.

Conclusion

Paying off your debts can be a stressful process, but if you organize your debts, budget, and earn money online, you will be able to be free of debt in no time. Knowing how to earn money online can be instrumental since you will get quick cash that can clear your debt impromptu. Earn money online and remain debt free.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grYB1kV_B6Y

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

21 Health Benefits of Broccoli (+10 Broccoli Recipes)

Are you looking for a vegetable to spice up your diet in a healthy way? If yes, then broccoli, also called Brassica oleracea italica, is the vegetable you want. The dark green crucifer is not only delicious but also has a multitude of nutrients that are vital to your wellbeing.

Here are 21 broccoli health benefits:

1. Contains Bioactive Compounds, Minerals, and Vitamins

Broccoli has the advantage of having a variety of nutrients. It has various fiber, vitamins, minerals, and other bioactive compounds. The vegetable can be eaten raw or cooked and offers different nutrient profiles.
Various cooking methods like steaming, stir-frying, boiling, and microwaving change the nutrient composition of the vegetable, especially decreasing vitamin C, sugar, and soluble protein. Steaming has the least adverse effects.

2. Has Potent Antioxidants

Antioxidants are elements that neutralize or inhibit cell damage created by free radicals. It can lead to a general health-protective impact and reduced inflammation.

Broccoli has high amounts of glucoraphanin, which converts into sulforaphane antioxidant during digestion. According to research, sulforaphane has multiple health benefits like reduced development of chronic disease, oxidative stress, high blood sugar, and high cholesterol levels.

3. Reduced Inflammation

This crucifer contains a variety of bioactive compounds that can minimize inflammation in the tissues of the body. A flavonoid called Kaempferol in this vegetable reveals powerful anti-inflammatory impacts, according to research.
A study of tobacco smokers showed that consuming the crucifer caused an essential decrease in inflammation markers.

4. Protection against Particular Types of Cancer

The vegetable has numerous bioactive compounds that help to decrease damage to cells caused by particular chronic diseases. According to studies, eating this crucifer may prevent cancers of the bladder, colon, prostate, kidney, stomach, and breast.

5. Blood Sugar Control

If you have diabetes, consuming this crucifer will aid in better control of blood sugar. The mechanism may not be known but could be linked to the antioxidant content of the vegetable. Research shows that consuming the crucifer daily could decrease insulin resistance in persons with type 2 diabetes.

Another study reveals that the crucifer reduces blood sugar in addition to reducing damage to the pancreas. Also, due to its high fiber content, it leads to lower blood sugar. This is one of the most vital broccoli health benefits.

6. Heart Health

High levels of bad cholesterol and triglycerides is a significant risk factor when it comes to heart disease. Research shows that regular consumption of this crucifer can aid in reducing triglyceride and bad cholesterol levels and increasing levels of good cholesterol.

Research also reveals that particular antioxidants contained in the sprout could decrease the general risk of heart attack. Moreover, due to the high levels of fiber in the sprout, it is linked to lower risk of heart attack.

7. Healthy Digestion and Reduced Constipation

Due to the high content of antioxidants and fiber in the crucifer, you will have a healthy digestive system and bowel function. It is vital that you have healthy gut bacteria and bowel regularity.

Research has shown that the crucifer leads to favorable adjustments in gut bacteria as well as decreased levels of inflammation in the colon. People who consume this vegetable can defecate easily.

8. Healthy Brain Function and Slow Mental Decline

Some bioactive compounds and nutrients in the crucifer could support healthy nervous tissue and brain function as well as reduce mental decline, making it one of the most crucial broccoli health benefits. A study showed that regular consumption of this dark green vegetable could resist mental decline linked to aging.

9. Slow Aging Process

The aging process is caused by a decline in metabolism and increased oxidative stress. Even though aging is natural, your diet may determine the development of diseases that are age-related.

According to research, sulforaphane found in the crucifer, can slow down the biochemical aging process through heightening the expression of antioxidant genes.

broccoli for aging

10. Healthy Immune System

The immune system of humans is complex and needs numerous nutrients for proper functioning. Vitamin C is the most vital nutrient for immune function and is found in high levels in this crucifer. Research reveals that vitamin C has a significant role in preventing and treating various diseases. A half a cup of Brassica oleracea italica has 84 percent of the required daily intake.

11. Oral and Dental Health

The crucifer is rich in calcium and vitamin C, which reduce the risk of periodontal infection. Kaempferol is a flavonoid found in the vegetable that aids in preventing periodontitis. Research shows that sulforaphane could reduce oral cancer risk.

12. Healthy Joints and Bones

Brassica oleracea italica is a rich source of calcium and vitamin K, which help in maintaining healthy and strong bones. It also has vitamins C and A, zinc, and phosphorous that are also essential for healthy bones.
Research has revealed the ability of sulforaphane to prevent osteoarthritis.

13. Healthy Pregnancy

The crucifer is an ideal source of B vitamins, particularly B9 or folate. It is an essential nutrient for developing the fetal spinal cord and brain. Studies reveal that regular consumption of the sprout by a pregnant mother could aid in the healthier cognitive development of the fetus.

14. Skin Protection from Sun Damage

According to studies, bioactive compounds in the crucifer could assist in protecting your skin against UV radiation, which causes skin cancer.

15. Vision Health

Research shows that the sprout could prevent blindness. This is due to the antioxidant called sulforaphane that safeguards your eyes from UV radiation. It also helps to avoid other serious eye diseases such as macular degeneration and cataracts. Other nutrients found in this vegetable that are important to your vision are vitamin C, zeaxanthin, and lutein.

16. Improved Sexual Health of Men

The crucifer is rich in folate that enhances the production of semen, causing improved fertility and more powerful orgasms. The crucifer also has vitamin A that increases the sperm count. It also prevents bladder cancer, which is more common in males than females.

17. Hair is Imparted with Luster

The crucifer’s seed oil has a special fatty acid composition that is responsible for making your hair shine. This omega-9 fatty acid is also referred to as erucic acid and offers your hair a natural and smooth sheen. This is one of the most amazing broccoli health benefits.

18. Reduced Cholesterol Levels

The sprout is high in soluble fiber and reduces the levels of cholesterol in your body, making it one of the essential broccoli health benefits. The fiber binds with bile acids in the digestive system to make it easy to remove cholesterol from your body.

19. Prevention of Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS)

ALS is a neurological disorder that causes nerve cells to die. Due to high amounts of carotenoids in Brassica oleracea italica, its regular intake prevents ALS.

20. Prevention of Anemia

The crucifer is rich in folic acids and iron that are essential in the prevention of anemia. It also has copper that helps to improve red blood cell production.

21. Prevention of High Blood Pressure

The sprout is rich in fiber and antioxidants that aid to regulate insulin. As a result, the blood pressure of your body will be regulated.

Here are 10 Broccoli Recipes:

1. Brassica Oleracea Italica, Pasta Salad, and Babycorn

This addictive serving includes the crucifer and fresh herbs such as basil and parsley for additional flavor as well as a dollop of cream to indulge yourself. The salad recipe is suitable for a light dinner or breakfast.

2. Broccoli Salad with Roasted Bell Pepper

This recipe has spring onions, Brassica oleracea italica, red peppers and yellow peppers mixed with a light seasoning of crunchy apricots.

3. Brassica Oleracea Italica with Salmon

It includes steamed salmon sprinkled with groundnut oil, ginger, onions, and garlic. It comes together with blanched Brassica oleracea italica served with ginger dressing, soy, and sesame seeds.

4. Brassica Oleracea Italica Pasta

The meal includes chili and cheese as well as Brassica oleracea italica and pasta. It takes only fifteen minutes to get ready. It is not only quick and easy to make, but it is also delicious and satisfying.

5. Cream of Brassica Oleracea Italica Soup

Soups are usually an ideal option to break the monotony of other meals. It can be even more perfect when a healthy vegetable such as Brassica oleracea italica is involved. It is healthy, thick, and creamy to eat when you feel cold during winter.

6. Broccoli with Cheddar Crepes

The recipe involves melted butter, bread crumbs, creamy Brassica oleracea italica sauce, and some grated and glazed cheese. The final meal consists of layers of thin crepes that are smeared with sauce and covered with grated cheese, melted butter, and bread crumbs, baked golden.

broccoli

7. Chatpatti Brassica Oleracea Italica

This stunning Brassica oleracea italica is prepared along with curry leaves, masala, tamarind, and pepper. The meal takes only twenty minutes to be ready and is delicious with lots of flavors.

8. Chargrilled Broccoli and Buttermilk Chicken

In the recipe, chicken is cooked with smooth buttermilk and served with garlic and chili sauce, lots of freshly grilled Brassica oleracea italica, and almond flakes. The meal is easy to prepare from home.

9. Broccoli Salad and French Dressing

This meal includes a mixture of bell peppers, celery, carrots, and Brassica oleracea italica florets together with French dressing.

10. Brassica Oleracea Italica Baked

This recipe involves using fresh creamy cheese and Brassica oleracea italica to make a no-fuss bake. It is a delicious and creamy meal to make at home. Children will not even notice the high quantity of vegetables.

Conclusion

High consumption of broccoli is not only delicious but also beneficial to your body in at least twenty one ways. These broccoli health benefits are essential since they affect major body organs including the brain, the heart, the skin, the eyes, and more. Eat this sprout for a healthy lifestyle.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yG-G9_LOkLA

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

10 Habits of A Lasting Relationship

The strive for a lasting relationship is a driving force and motivation in the lives of many. And by relationships, we mean everything from marriage to dating and ending with the relationship between friends.

Couples in long-lasting relationships seem to have been made for each other. It is proven that couples who stay together have some things in common like doing chores together, sharing the same values, and having common social circles.

Although there are things that are a given when it comes to good relationships, each couple has the potential to make it in the long run. It is our habits that create our character and our lives. That being said, the habits of a long-lasting relationship have proven to work in smoothing out even the roughest rides between two people.

10 Habits of a Long-Lasting Relationship

relationship myths

Open Communication

Communication is the primary factor behind really good relationships. While all relationships go through hard periods when the two people within the couple can convey what they want to say in a clear and precise manner, it makes things much easier for both people.

Many people in relationships somehow expect their partners to know what is on their minds. Unfortunately, most of us cannot read minds or the subtle clues that the other is trying to pass to us. This can cause the other to believe the other doesn’t understand them and lead to anger, resentment, and confusion.

In a relationship, the two people will have different way of conveying ideas. It may take some practice for couples to achieve communication that is understandable to both of them.

A good way to start is to follow some simple steps for the communication to flow easily, even if the partners have very different communication styles.

  • Take away all types of distractions when communicating with your partner. This includes the phone, computers, and TV.
  • Know clearly what it is that you want to communicate to the other
  • Talk about the situation and how you feel about it
  • Talk about your feelings and needs using “I.”
  • Within the conversation, do not involve and throw the responsibility on the other. Be responsible for your own experiences by stating everything using “I.”
  • Be a good listener. In parts of the conversation, allow the other person to express their point of view without interrupting and with an understanding about where they are coming from
  • Maintain the tone of your voice

Think About Your Partner’s Happiness

We believe that relationships are there to make us happy and take care of all of our needs. However, happiness is more about living in symbiosis with the others and caring for their needs.

A lasting relationship is one in which each person gives to the other and prioritizes their wants and needs. If the other person is just as committed to you as you are to them, they will learn from you and begin to prioritize your needs.

This is the general way in which a good lasting relationship operates. Long-lasting relationships between people who genuinely love each have this model work for them.

Have Time For Affection

Physical touch is one of the languages of love. it is the ultimate biological way to show another human being that they are important to you, and you accept them completely.

People who are in a physically affectionate-lasting relationship are much more happy and more satisfied than others. It is simple and easy to do.

When couples are just starting their lives together, there is a lot of physical affection for each other. This stage of the relationship is something that doesn’t have to go away and it is something that can strengthen the chemistry and intimacy between the couple.

Generosity

Being generous is something that we all know theoretically. But what is it like to go a little out of your way to make the life of another easier and more pleasant? This is where generosity comes in.

Generosity can show in many ways in a long-lasting relationship. It could be done by trying to make the other laugh, being generous with your time even when you are busy, and giving small gifts occasionally.

Being Present

Being present in the moment is a subtle quality with a big effect on the interaction within a lasting relationship. Think about being with someone who only pays partial attention to what you are saying or doing.

Being present and being there for the other person through listening to them, paying attention to them, and seeing them when they are home makes you attractive to your partner. This means prioritizing the relationship and putting other things off for a second so your partner can feel validated and respected.

Being Open to Change

A lasting relationship is something that should go on for a long time. It is impossible for two people to never change in the long time they are together. Couples who want to know that together and even expect it as a part of their journey together.

Couples in a long-lasting relationship will understand that things will change as the two people change. instead of feeling threatened, a good partner will accept this change s an integral part of their relationship and evolve with it.

Forgiveness and Apology

Everyone makes mistakes. This is an inevitable part of life and it is especially hard to avoid hurting someone who is in a lasting relationship with you.

Couples who are solid in their relations with each other do not let fights and small arguments drag into their relationships. People in couples are so important to one another that they can let themselves admit their mistakes by asking for forgiveness and owning their mistakes. The other person is compassionate enough to be able to forgive.

Holding grudges and ‘punishing’ the other are habits that can be poisonous to long-term relationships. That is why people who genuinely care for their partner allow themselves the time to calm down and let go of their hurts with the optimism that everything will work out fine in the future.

Holding Onto the Best of the Other

No person in the world is perfect. While there can be strong degrees of compatibility, there will always be something about the other person that is not enjoyed. The difference between ordinary couples and those in successful, long-lasting relationships is that those in long-term relationships understand the power of their perception of the other.

A factor that predicts longevity in a relationship is holding a positive image of one’s partner. This means that although the partner exhibits different behaviors when one keeps focussing on their good qualities and what is preferred in them, the couple tends to stay ‘in love even when they have been together for a very long time.

Detecting and Managing Stress

Stress can eat away at us, particularly something that is so important to us as our lasting relationship is. When we are stressed, our relationships are affected as well. Most people can unknowingly transfer their stresses from other parts of their lives onto their partnerships.

A good place to start is knowing where your stress comes from and what is causing it. Make a clear distinction between stressful factors and your relationship, and leave the stress out the door when talking and interacting with your partner.

Things that you can do to manage your stress levels are seemingly little, but they help. It could be meditating, sleeping enough hours every night, eating well, and exercising. These things will not only improve your health but your relationship as well.

Being a Team

Some couples tend to interact with each other as if they are on a battlefield. This is a pattern of behavior that does not contribute to a good relationship.

When two people are in a couple, it is in their best interest to understand that they are together on the same ship. When one fails, so does the other.

lasting relationship

While conflicts can arise and they do between two different people, couples who want to make it, in the long run, understand that they must solve the problems together as a team. It is no longer about who is right and wrong but more about “how can we work together to solve this problem that we have”.

This type of behavior builds trust and friendliness between the two people and lets them solve conflicts in a mature manner.

Final Thoughts on Cultivating a Lasting Relationship

A long lasting relationship is not something that is a given. Compatibility between partners is only the soil on which the lasting relationship grows. Although it matters, a couple that wants to make something beautiful grow between them will cultivate their relations and grow as individuals along the way.

And as Anthony Robbins says, “Do what you did at the beginning of the relationship and there won’t be an end”. It is too easy to slack off when time passes, but a long-term relationship does not have to be given up on. Make every day as if it is the first one you met the other to keep the relationship refreshed and alive.

18 Signs Of A Toxic Relationship (Most People Ignore)

A toxic relationship has the ability to surface in any type of relationship such as with a significant other, a child, a parent, a co-worker or even a best friend. For your mental and physical health, it is essential that you get rid of toxic relationship situations in your life as quickly as possible.

It is important to keep your eyes open to red flags as a toxic relationships can have serious and severe consequences. Some of such consequences can be to your long-term health.

Once you get rid of toxic relationship circumstances, your life will quickly begin to head in a positive direction, your self-confidence will return, you will begin to succeed at work, your other relationships will return to ones of positivity and you will feel happier each day.

Here are 18 signs that you need to get rid of toxic relationship people in your life:

You Give, They Take

respectAdam Grant, who is a Wharton professor and a highly regarded relationship author, says that the best way to achieve a successful relationship is to establish an equal match of give and take. In a toxic relationship, one person only takes and never gives.

While being a giver in a relationship, whether it be business or romantic, does not necessarily mean you are being taken advantage of by someone. You might simply like to take care of others. For a successful relationship, it is important to learn to establish balance.

You are Exhausted

An unhealthy relationship can be entirely exhausting. You might feel depleted and emotionally drained from arguing, walking on eggshells or hoping you do not encounter the toxic individual.

These people can be anyone from a co-worker who constantly tries to undermine or demean your accomplishments or an in-law who likes to cause trouble. If you are simply exhausted from speaking or encountering these people, you are likely in a toxic relationship.

Low Self-Esteem

Are you typically a confident individual in most situations, yet with that certain someone you often feel bad about yourself after you spend time together? If so, you need to get rid of toxic relationship people who give you low self-esteem.

According to a study published by the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, low self-esteem in a relationship can cause you to perceive the relationship differently than its reality. It can cause you to behave differently than normal and even make you paranoid or insecure.

You Feel Threatened

You can feel threatened in a number of ways. For instance, you might feel threatened to lose your identity. You might feel threatened by a third party in a jealous manner. Or, you might feel threatened in a more dangerous manner. If you ever question your safety, get out immediately.

You should never be made to feel intimidated or threatened in a physical manner. This is unacceptable, and you should tell someone. Do not hesitate to involve the authorities.

So Much Drama

Too much drama is not constructive and results in a toxic relationship. Examples of excessive drama include game playing, an open-ended relationship status, wondering eyes, not cleaning up after one’s self, being jealous, constant gossiping, neediness and emotional unavailability.

A little drama can be directly related to passion; however, if the drama never stops, it is likely unhealthy and time to walk away.

Controlling Tendencies

Do you feel as though you cannot express your opinions without this person having a bad emotional reaction? They will attempt to control the way you think, as well as the things you do and the people with whom you spend time. They will also make fun of you to make you feel bad.

Some ways to break free from such individuals, according to Psychology Today, is to create a support system, ask for help, establish goals to get rid of toxic relationship circumstances and follow through in the end.

Belittling

Belittling may not seem like a big deal; however, it absolutely is a big deal and should be dealt with as soon as possible. When someone is intentionally, or unintentionally, putting your down, it is not okay.

This type of toxicity is typically regarded as emotional and psychological abuse. Abuse does not have to be physical to cause lasting damage and should never be tolerated.

Negativity Bias

Negativity bias contributes greatly to bad habits and bad situations. That’s because negativity bias forms from bad experiences over time.

These experiences make a person assume a circumstance is going to result in the same manner and react negatively before the other person even has a chance to respond or act. If you or the other person is always assuming the worse, the relationship is unlikely to succeed.

Physical Reactions

Even if the person in your negative relationship has never been physically abusive, you can still have involuntary physical reactions to someone. You might become nervous, anxious or even ill in their presence or simply from thinking about an upcoming encounter.

According to an NBC News article, some anxiousness is normal and even considered good. However, if these feelings are negatively impacting your life, it is not a good sign.

The Endless Bickering

Do you feel as though you are in an endless argument because you are fighting incessantly? It is important to note that many mental health professionals, such as couples therapist Wendi L. Dumbroff, MA, LPC, believe that some fighting in a relationship is healthy.

Note that constant disagreements are not considered healthy, and the way you approach disagreements, fights and arguments can be considered healthy or unhealthy. If you rarely find common ground and disagree about most things, this is likely a toxic relationship.

Isolation

If an individual wishes to remove you from all other relationships in your life, this type of isolation is toxic. The person will do everything in their power to remove you from your support system so they can control you even further.

It is important to be mindful of whether or not it is you or your partner trying to isolate you from the people in your life. Some people unknowingly disappear when they start a relationship without influence from their partner, and this is not necessarily toxic.

Keeping Score

Every couple knows that it is quite normal to keep score on occasion. However, you need to get rid of toxic relationships when scorekeeping increases from rare to common.

Dr. Bernstein also states that keeping score often stems from frustration and significant misunderstandings. He suggests that to avoid this type of destructive communication it is best to point out positive aspects and eliminate criticism.

Everything is a Competition

A toxic relationship based on competition is often found in work relationships and friendships; however, they can also occur in romantic partnerships and with family members. These people never actually listen to you and they will constantly try to one-up you in every aspect of your life.

Power Struggle

It is possible that you are both contributors to the toxicity of the relationship in some way. This is the result of a power struggle by both parties. When a person feels powerless in a relationship, they will often lash out in a demanding way as a method of overcompensation.

This dynamic can occur in all relationships from a child and a parent to interactions between co-workers. Sometimes, the reaction is based on another person attempting to control the other; whereas, in other circumstances, the lashing out is a self-imposed powerless feeling.

Self-Sabotage

You or the other person in your relationship may be deliberately or subconsciously sabotaging the relationship for a number of reasons. Someone may feel the relationship has run its course. They may feel highly insecure about the relationship. Or, it could be a reaction to past experiences.

Lack of Trust

Trust is difficult for some people. Whether you have been wronged in relationships in the past or you have a feeling that the person in your current relationship is not trustworthy, you cannot move forward if you do not have trust.

toxic relationship

Some actions that may prove that you do not trust someone are that you constantly monitor their social media, you ask others to confirm where they have been, you make accusations, you get jealous or you insist on having their passwords. These are all bad signs.

Judgment and Criticism

If someone is constantly passing judgment on you and criticizing you in a highly non-constructive manner, they are a toxic person. It is important to note that a complaint is not criticism, and a person who holds contempt in a relationship is equally as toxic.

Disrespect

According to the Palo Alto Medical Foundation, respect is the most important factor in building a healthy relationship. A person with respect in a relationship will not incorporate many of the previous actions listed. Think of behaviors like belittling, accusing irrationally, or inflicting emotional abuse.

Final Thoughts on a Toxic Relationship

Toxic people can cause a rapid decline in your quality of life, as well as negatively impact all of your relationships. The good news is that you can take control back and turn all of those negatives into positives.

It is important to pay attention to all red flags and be sure to take accountability for your own possible contributions to the toxicity. If you feel bad about yourself in any relationship or if you ever feel in danger, it is time to make a change, and do so quickly.

Top 4 Zodiac Signs That You Are Most Compatible With According To Your Zodiac

Are you looking for your perfect match? When you are searching for a friend or partner, one fun way to check out your compatibility is by using your zodiac sign. Zodiac sign compatibility depends on a variety of factors. The pairings of zodiac signs shown here is based on the traditional personality qualities of each sign.

Your zodiac sign compatibility can lead you to a fruitful friendship or a romantic match. Look through this list and find out whether your partnership is destined to last based on your zodiac sign. Be open-minded and ready to look at friendships and relationships you wouldn’t expect to succeed.

Top 4 Signs That You Are Most Compatible With According to your Zodiac Sign

“The starry vault of heaven is in truth the open book of cosmic projection…” – Carl Jung

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Ideal Matches for Aries: Leo, Sagittarius, Libra, and Aquarius

Aries is focused on action, not words. They are most compatible with fellow fire signs Leo and Sagittarius. They can be frustrated by air signs like Libra, but their essential differences can mesh to provide a lively relationship.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Ideal Matches for Taurus: Virgo, Pisces, Capricorn, and Libra

Taurus is one of the most steadfast signs. Focused on comfort and stability, the Taurus can provide a sensitive sign like Pisces with necessary stability. Taurus also appreciates the arts and the finer things in life.

Gemini (May 21 – June 21)

Ideal Matches for Gemini: Libra, Aquarius, Leo, and Sagittarius

Gemini loves intellectual conversations. Their fellow air signs, Libra and Aquarius, will provide plenty of witty banter.

Cancer (June 22 – July 22)

Ideal Matches for Cancer: Pisces, Capricorn, Gemini, and Scorpio

Cancer is one of the most sensitive and emotional signs of the zodiac. Pisces is his or her perfect match much of the time. Both Capricorn and Gemini find Cancer’s gentle personality attractive.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

Ideal Matches for Leo: Sagittarius, Libra, Gemini, and Aries

Leo and Aries have an instant compatibility. Both Fire signs, they can get to know each other deeply. Leo finds a useful contrast in joking Sagittarius and compassionate Aquarius.

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Ideal Matches for Virgo: Taurus, Capricorn, Scorpio, and Pisces

Earth sign Virgo goes best with Taurus, Capricorn, and Scorpio, but can also be delighted with the gentle Pisces.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Ideal Matches for Libra: Aries, Gemini, Taurus, and Aquarius

Libra is capable of settling down the temperamental Aries, something no other zodiac sign can claim. Libra enjoys Gemini’s sparkling personality and is reassured by Taurus’ steadiness.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Ideal Matches for Scorpio: Capricorn, Pisces, Scorpio, and Taurus

It’s been said that Scorpio is the most stubborn of all signs. Bull-headed Taurus has the fortitude to put up with a Scorpio’s forceful personality, as does another Scorpio. Scorpio finds more of a contrast in Pisces and Capricorn.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Ideal Matches for Sagittarius: Aries, Leo, Gemini, and Aquarius

Sagittarius has the reputation of becoming bored easily. These four signs can keep things lively with sparkling conversation and spontaneous actions.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Ideal Matches for Capricorn: Taurus, Cancer, Virgo, and Pisces

Another Earth sign, Capricorn longs for a long-term, lasting partnerships. These four signs desire a commitment and will make a good complement to Capricorn’s intellectual personality.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Ideal Matches for Aquarius: Gemini, Libra, Pisces, and Leo

Aquarius is mysterious and free-spirited, appealing to Gemini’s two-sided nature. Aquarius is fascinated with the dreamy Pisces.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Ideal Matches for Pisces: Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, and Pisces

Pisces is one of the most emotional signs. Cancer finds a lot in common with this Water sign. The fiery Scorpio is also drawn to the calmness and mystery of Pisces.

zodiac sign

Final Thoughts

Don’t worry if your pairing with your partner or with your best friend isn’t listed here. Astrology can provide a useful guide to the mix and match of different personalities, but a zodiac sign can’t make or break a relationship. Sometimes the exception proves the rule.

Have fun with these pairings and find out which of your friends and family are listed here. Whether your friends and family members are liberated Air signs or steadfast Earth signs, you’ll find new dimensions to their personalities when you consider their zodiac signs.

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