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10 Things To Remember When The One You Love Suffers From Addiction

March 19, 2017 by Power of Positivity

For both people who have addiction and those who love them, darkness is an all too familiar place. Loving an addict sometimes requires “showing light” when everything feels dark.

Feelings of futility and dread are felt by both parties – and overwhelming uncertainty about what the future holds persists.

A feeling of impossibility.

Not every addict will experience the same fate; nor will every person who loves them. Loving an addict can be incredibly frustrating. It’s not uncommon for addicts to lie, manipulate, and guilt-trip in order to experience the only thing that will make them “right” again: the next fix.

As frustrating as loving an addict may be, it is a path to be taken. How we determine to walk that path is up to us.

Here, we discuss 10 things to remember when someone you love suffers from any form of addiction. We’ve approached this issue with both objectivity and compassion; applying many recommendations from experts on the topic.

Always remember:

“Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.” -Helen Keller

10 Things To Remember When The One You Love Suffers From Addiction

1. Addiction changes the person

Once an addiction grabs hold of someone, they are not the same – an unfortunate truth, but the truth nonetheless. Addiction rewires the brain, distorting reality to the point that the addict no longer recognizes themselves. They ultimately become a different person.

The sooner a loved one realizes and accepts this fact, the sooner they can begin responding to the addict in a way that promotes healing (more about this below.)

2. Don’t be afraid to say “No.”

Overcoming addiction is only possible when the addict realizes that staying the same is worse than the alternative. Addiction controls the person, not the other way around – and loved ones must understand and accept this.

In an addicted state, they’ll go to their family and friends for “help.” Maybe twenty bucks, a ride someplace, borrowing a cell phone, etc. In reality, this “help” is an enabler. It’s important to have the strength to say “No” when this is the case.

3. Be realistic about things

Loving an addict will always produce some sense of fear. The most convenient way to defeat fear is to deny its presence, which many people do. Loving an addict requires that one maintains a realistic outlook; this means not denying when something feels “off,” and resisting the urge to look past the addiction for a “favor.”

4. Don’t accept their distorted beliefs

More specifically, do not buy into their belief that they cannot live without their addiction. This isn’t easy, as an addict will indeed reach a point where they believe this to be true. Even though they may not know change is possible, you do. Recovery demands accountability from both the addict and their inner circle; of which, the latter plays a significant role.

5. Be resolute, even if things seem to get worse

When a loved one decides to stand their ground and reject any more excuses or distorted beliefs, the addict will become difficult to handle. Prior efforts to lie or manipulate are often elevated, as the addict desperately seeks resources to support their habit. A determined, undeterred mindset in this regard is critical.

6. Set clear (but loving) boundaries

Setting strict boundaries with an addict may seem harsh and unfair, but this couldn’t be any more untrue. Establishing limitations is essential, as is unbudgingly sticking with them. Boundaries allow the loved one to maintain a clear outlook; one free from the self-imposed, false realities of the addict.

7. Keep yourself in mind

As evident, loving an addict involves a significant amount of effort and stress. It is important, then, that the loved ones realize the importance of taking care of themselves. Recognizing that caring for themselves first will enable them to better care for the addict is vital

8. Distinguish between helping and enabling

When our loved ones are suffering, it is natural to offer our support in response. When dealing with an addict, understanding the difference between “helping and “enabling” may be the difference-maker in their recovery. In short, helping an addict supports the person. Enabling supports the addiction.

9. Don’t blame the addict or yourself

Although an addict may bear some responsibility for their habit, it is important to refrain from laying blame on them. Though they may not say it, they’re likely already deeply ashamed of their addiction. Blaming hurts the loved one as well, by inciting emotions of anger and regret.

10. Let them know they’re loved

Gosh, how important this last one is. Letting the person know that you have – and always will – love them is so very powerful. Say it as often as you can.

9 Ways Smart People Deal With Toxic People

March 16, 2017 by Power of Positivity

For most of us, daily life is stressful enough. We face a myriad of responsibilities, both personal and professional, that often push us close to our limits. It is, therefore, necessary to mitigate stressors that threaten our mental, emotional and physical well-being.

Similar to toxins in the environment, toxic people can inflict serious harm. Unlike many toxins, however, there is no type of “warning” that educates us on the threats such people pose. Thus, we must rely on our judgment, instincts, and will to effectively counteract toxic people.

The fact is that some people are more adept at handling toxic people than others; as such people often possess a keen sense of emotional intelligence and other attributes, along with the will to act when necessary

Toxicity: The degree to which a substance (a toxin or poison) can harm humans or animals. Acute toxicity involves harmful effects in an organism through a single or short-term exposure. – MedicineNet

This brings us to the topic of this article. We’re going to discuss 9 ways that smart people efficiently and swiftly deal with toxic people.

Here’s how smart people handle toxic people:

1. They’re very self-aware

Psychology Today defines the term as “accurate appraisal and understanding of your abilities and preferences and their implications for your behavior and their impact on others.”

A keen sense of self-awareness is also an incredibly powerful prevention tool – and a essential one. Being self-aware allows us to acknowledge, understand and account for any internal or external influence that threats to “throw us off our game.” Of course, this includes toxic folk.

2. They forgive, but don’t forget

The gray matter between our ears is not the only determinant of intellect. Intelligence is multifaceted. As it pertains to handling toxic people, emotional intelligence takes the cake.

Emotionally intelligent people understand forgiveness as a necessary component of psychological well-being. However, they also understand the importance of not forgetting those who betrayed their trust. This intelligence allows the person to focus their efforts on building relationships with individuals who have earned such a right.

3. They’re unaffected by circumstance

Let’s not kid ourselves: it isn’t easy to remain emotionally neutral when amongst toxic people; however, it is an absolute necessity. Resilience is an attribute of emotional intelligence – and one that pays significant dividends when having to deal with toxic people.

Since we’re on a “definition-fest,” we’ll define resilience as “that ineffable quality that allows some people to be knocked down by life and come back stronger than ever.” Make no mistake, toxic people cause many to be “knocked down,” but resilience allows us to come back strong.

4. They quickly establish boundaries

Smart people often possess the innate ability to remain productive and effective. To this end, they’ll quickly mitigate any detectable threat that may affect that ability. Relatedly, when smart people detect toxic people, they’ll take swift and effective action.

This doesn’t mean they’ll be rude and abrasive. They’ll be polite and firm, yet unambiguous and uncompromising. They just won’t allow negative people to effect them in any way, shape, or form.

5. They’re “energy-smart.”

While toxic people thrive by draining others’ energy, smart people thrive by maintaining their energy supply. Being “energy-smart” simply means understanding how to manage one’s energy in the most efficient way possible.

When we’re energy-smart, we won’t allow toxic people to drain this precious resource. Instead, we’ll conserve it in order to take positive action.

6. They focus on the task at hand

When it comes right down to it, toxic people are simply another external distraction. This perception isn’t dehumanizing – it’s realistic and fair. In fact, many toxic people intend to distract others with their antics.

Smart people just do not allow permit such distractions. They’ll focus on what’s in front of them and move on…regardless of who is around them.

7. They look for their support system

As mentioned, smart people are often driven people – individuals that seek a better life for both themselves and their loved ones. It’s also quite likely that such individuals understand the importance of mentorship and teamwork.

When faced with the challenge of a toxic person (or group of people), smarties will tap into their pool of trust mentors and co-workers to rectify the situation.

8. They’ll quickly check negative self-talk

Even those with high emotional intelligence are susceptible to negative self-talk from time-to-time. Toxic people can induce negative thinking in others if the recipient is unprepared for such – and this happens to all of us.

However, smart people are often able to quickly recognize and neutralize negative self-talk. The ability to neutralize includes counterproductive thoughts that arise from a toxic person.

9. They’re solution-oriented

As is apparent by now, intelligent people have the talent for seeking out solutions to problems. Dealing with a toxic person or group of people is just another issue that demands a solution. In typical fashion, emotionally intelligent people will assess their options and take the appropriate action.

References:
Furnham, A., Ph.D. (2016, November 27). Self Awareness. Retrieved January 03, 2017, from https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/sideways-view/201511/self-awareness
Hendricks, D. A. (2015, July 09). 8 Ways Emotionally Intelligent People Deal With Toxic People. Retrieved January 03, 2017, from http://www.inc.com/drew-hendricks/8-ways-emotionally-intelligent-people-deal-with-toxic-people.html
Whitbourne-Krauss , S., Ph.D., Bernhard, T., J.D., & Flora, C. (n.d.). Psychology Today. Retrieved January 03, 2017, from https://www.psychologytoday.com/basics/resilience

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

40 Things Every Person Should Know By Age 40

March 16, 2017 by Power of Positivity

Are there things that everyone “should know” by age 40?

As the “generations” evolve, so does the experience of “growing up.” For example, the “Greatest Generation” had it different than the “Baby Boomers”, who (certainly) have experienced life differently than millennials. No offense, young ones. Generational differences aside, the accumulation of “life knowledge”– at least to an extent – depends on involuntary factors (e.g. sex and type of upbringing). In creating this list, we’ve taken these things into account.

This question is very subjective. 40 years is a long time (at least in human years), and many of us have very likely gained life experiences and knowledge that are applicable to other 40-somethings.

In other words, it is highly probable that many in this demographic have a shared understanding – at least at a basic level – of “how the world works.” So, we’re going to list 40 things everyone ‘should’ know by age 40? Why 40 things? We’ll let you try and figure that one out.

It is important to understand that this article, as with many we publish, are intended to be fun, humorous…and, maybe, a bit insightful. Some of these may apply to you, some (most likely) will not.

We just want you to have fun, laugh a bit, and maybe (maybe) take away something else.

“Life really does begin at 40. Up until then, you are just doing research.” – Carl Jung

Anyways…here are those 40 things/experiences/lessons:

1. Weekend benders are ALWAYS a bad idea

2. Nothing beats a good night’s sleep

3. One’s “career path” can include multiple forks in the road

4. Having your own den/mancave/hideout is irreplaceable

5. Your social circle has become smaller and smaller – and for the better

6. A night alone or with a significant other beats “hitting the town” almost every time

7. You’ve had at least one great love that took some time to get over

8. To have kids or to not have kids? Odds are, you know the answer by now

9. To have a pet or not have a pet? Same thing…it’s either your “thing” or not

10. You’ve experienced at least one tragedy, unfortunately

11. You’ve ate something completely strange…and now love it

12. You’ve fought for something bigger than yourself…by donating money, giving time, etc.

13. Singing karaoke is enough to induce a panic attack if sober

14. Singing karaoke can be a blast (or at least tolerable) when you’ve “had a few”

15. Fashion sense matters as much as the color of your toilet’s lid

16. You’ve (hopefully) realized the inevitability of death – and seek to live to the fullest

17. If you’re not a “people person,” you’ll (probably) never be one

18. Fatty foods seem to have an immediate bloating effect

19. Exercise is a wonderful antidote to just about anything

20. A good read is a wonderful antidote to just about anything

21. The word “success” takes on much, much less meaning

22. Intimacy (i.e. “sex life”) is wonderful in moderation…and when you’re in love

23. The youngsters look to you for advice more often – for better or worse

24. Dancing is either (a) completely acceptable (you can dance), or (b) completely off limits (just, no)

25. 99 percent of the stuff learned in college is not – and never will be – an important part of your life

26. Slippers, a robe, a cardigan – you either own one of these…and/or you enjoy crossword puzzles

27. Marijuana (aka, “pot”)…you either enjoy the occasional hit, or you absolutely refuse

28. Your internal bull**** meter has been finely-tuned, or at least received a tune-up

29. Talking to people on the phone is limited to (a) co-workers or (b) family – about 99 percent of the time

30. Being “uninvited” to something can feel really, really good

31. Formal work events almost always suck

32. Playing videogames, computer games, and/or other games are still really fun…or not

33. Not having “a plan” has been totally worth it…or the “plan” has yielded a good life

34. Incoming phone calls, e-mails, and other communications are looked upon with disdain

35. Taking the time to learn something new is almost always stoked by passion, not persuasion

36. Arguing with someone is: (a) pointless, (b) a waste of energy, and (c) “isn’t my favorite show on right now?”

37. You’ve either wished to travel the world, don’t care, or have obtained a passport

38. Come to realize that hangovers are both miserable and completely avoidable

39. The “Snooze” button looks really, really good from Monday through Friday…maybe even Saturday and Sunday…

40. Realized that 40 is still young…and you’ve got plenty left in the tank – and you’re grateful for that.

How about you, dear reader, can you identify with any of these 40 “things you should know by age 40?”

We’d love to hear your feedback!

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

How to Train Your Brain To Fall Asleep in 1 Minute or Less

March 14, 2017 by Power of Positivity

In our constantly plugged-in, fast-paced society today, it’s no wonder why so many people have problems falling asleep. Some doctors and researchers have even called lack of adequate sleep a public health epidemic due to the number of sleep-deprived citizens today. In fact, according to a Gallup report, a staggering 41% of Americans don’t get the recommended 7-8 hours of sleep per night.

As you’ve probably heard before, our cells regenerate during sleep, allowing us to carry out all the tasks of a day’s work. However, improper sleep can lead to poor mental and physical health. In fact, David Earnest, Ph.D., a professor at Texas A & M University’s College of Medicine, warned that “Sleep deprivation’s effect on working memory is staggering. Your brain loses efficiency with each hour of sleep deprivation.”

Sleep deficiency can lead to chronic health problems, including high blood pressure, obesity, anxiety, depression, heart disease, and cancer, to name a few. Researchers found that the genes affected controlled inflammation, immunity, and stress response.

So, what can we do about this ever-growing sleep problem? For starters, it would help to learn how to fall asleep again, something that came very naturally to us as children. However, due to life stress and all the things that come along with “growing up,” many of us have simply forgotten how to fall asleep quickly. Our minds keep us awake at night, inducing anxiety and restlessness.

How to Train Your Brain To Fall Asleep in 1 Minute or Less

While clearing your mind before sleep may seem difficult, Dr. Andrew Weil recommends a simple breathing technique to help you relax. He points to the 4-7-8 breathing technique as a natural sleep remedy for the nights when sleep seems to elude you. Below, we’ll discuss exactly how to do this breathing exercise.

First, ensure you have the right posture to allow deep breathing. (Sit up straight, relax your shoulders, etc)
Place the tip of your tongue on the roof of your mouth behind your front teeth. Keep it there throughout the exercise, even as you exhale.
Exhale completely.
Inhale through your nose to a count of four.
Hold your breath for a count of seven.
Exhale through your mouth to a count of eight.
Then, complete the sequence three more times.

It might take a few nights of practice to work, but consistency is key. You might have trouble concentrating on doing the exercise at first, but remember to set aside some time before bed so that you can focus on nothing but breathing.

So, why does this technique work so well, you ask? We have three main reasons. Firstly, it allows you to slow your breathing, automatically making you feel more relaxed. Secondly, you will have more oxygen coursing through your body by taking deeper breaths. Thirdly, concentrating on solely your breathing will teach you mindfulness, which many scientists have proven to reduce stress, anxiety, and racing thoughts.

Maybe we’ve forgotten how to sleep because we’ve forgotten how to breathe, but by practicing this breathing exercise, you’ll fall asleep quicker and have a more restful sleep.

You can also do other things to induce sleep, a few of which we have outlined below.

More Tips on How to Fall Asleep Faster

Don’t do any work in your bed. You need to associate your bed with sleep and relaxation, not anything else.
Keep the house comfortable. Studies have shown that people sleep better when the thermostat is set to cool.
Write down any thoughts you might have before you go to sleep. This way, you can get out all of your stress and frustration before sleep so that you won’t lie awake thinking of everything under the sun that worries you.
Remove any distractions. Turn off your cell phone, TV, and other digital devices to prepare for sleep and avoid keeping your mind active.
Try to keep your house quiet. However, if relaxing music helps you fall asleep, by all means, turn it on before bed.
Have a routine. Our bodies require a specific wake-sleep cycle to function correctly, so go to bed at the same time each night and wake at the same time each morning.

Final Thoughts on Making Sleep a Priority in Your Life–You Deserve It!

Remember, sleep is vital to living your best life, so honor your needs and prioritize your sleep. You’ll feel more vibrant and happy once you have a regular sleeping schedule. Sweet dreams!

References:
In U.S., 40% Get Less Than Recommended Amount of Sleep. http://www.gallup.com/poll/166553/less-recommended-amount-sleep.aspx?utm_source=alert&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=syndication&utm_content=morelink&utm_term=USA%20-%20Well-Being
The 4-7-8 Breath: Health Benefits and Demonstration. https://www.drweil.com/videos-features/videos/the-4-7-8-breath-health-benefits-demonstration/

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

How Changing The Clock Changes Your Brain

March 12, 2017 by Power of Positivity

Daylight savings time is a fairly modern invention and it became a popular idea for practical and financial reasons. When people first used artificial light, they had to either burn either gas or oil lamps. The use of these fuels cost money, and the more dark hours that people were awake, the more money it took to light the home.

As lighting technology evolved, electrical bills made for a similar financial problem. By changing the time on the clock, we could save money by keeping the lights on less time that we were awake. At the other end of the clock in the morning, farmers were getting up with first light to work their fields no matter what the clock said.

Daylight Savings Time and Your Brain

Due to the tilting of the Earth on its axis at the Winter Equinox, we in the Northern Hemisphere loose precious hours of daylight while those in the Southern Hemisphere experience the reversed seasons. According to timeanddate.com, legislators in Canada were the first to propose that we simply shift our clocks to say that when the nights are too long, we extend waking hours by moving the clock forward an hour.

When the sun would be setting at around 6pm, we shift our clocks to say that sunset is now at 7pm, giving us an ‘extra’ hour of daylight. Time is a fluid concept in the sense that we have artificially assigned a number to the hour of the day. For example, the number 12 represents either noon or midnight. But we could just as easily call noon by the number 4 or 8.

According to the American Journal of Physiology, daylight savings time can have detrimental effects on the human brain, partly due to decreased levels of melatonin. The researchers say ‘We recently reported that humans have mechanisms, like those that exist in other animals, which detect changes in day length and make corresponding adjustments in the duration of nocturnal periods of secretion of melatonin and of other functions. We detected these responses in individuals who were exposed to artificial “days” of different durations.’

Our human senses have evolved to be able to detect changes in the natural light around us. The ability to detect small changes in light resulted in ancient humans developing the ability to increase secretion of melatonin and of other functions as they sleep. However, modern man isn’t adapting well to changes in daylight savings time.

Research shows that our use of artificial light has reduced our natural ability to detect daylight changes as the seasons change. The scientists say ‘The results of this study suggest that modern men’s use of artificial light suppresses responses to seasonal changes in the natural photoperiod that might otherwise occur.’

Circadian Rhythm and Your Mental Health

The amount of daylight we are exposed to can affect mental health by increasing the risk for depression. Depression from a lack of sunlight is a very real mental health condition. Sufferers of Seasonal Affective Disorder are those who feel the ‘Winter Blahs’ particularly strongly as symptoms that are like those of a depressed mood. The winter season with less sunlight can cause a lack of appetite, lack of energy, lack of desire to do anything, depressed feelings, and withdrawing from social activities.

By manipulating the amount of artificial light that a group of study participants received in the morning, researchers in the American Journal of Psychiatry were able to reduce symptoms of depression that are brought on by reduced daylight. The scientists found that the optimal amount of light was a 250-lux dawn simulation over a 2-hour period of time to reduce the effects of winter depression from a lack of daylight.

Avoiding Mental Health Problems During Daylight Savings Time

To improve your mental effectiveness during waking hours in the darker months and prevent psychological problems, look for light bulbs that give you a full spectrum of light. Using full spectrum light bulbs in light fixtures that you turn on in the morning will help your body to sense the artificial daylight and respond with more alertness.

During the winter months when daylight savings time is in effect, try to spend at least 15 minutes outside when the sun is at its strongest, usually between noon and 2pm. A small amount of exposure to sunlight will fulfill your requirements to get your daily Vitamin D benefit. In the winter, even with typical head to toe body coverings, we need only approximately one square inch of skin exposed to the sunlight for about 30 minutes to produce adequate Vitamin D for our bodies.

Improving your diet with foods fortified with Vitamin D or dietary supplements will allow your body to have access to more of the only vitamin that your body naturally produces with exposure to sunshine. This may be necessary, especially in winter months if you limit your exposure to sunlight when it is cold.

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved

Sources:
http://time.com/4560579/daylight-savings-mental-health/
Suppression of men’s responses to seasonal changes in day length by modern artificial lighting
http://ajpregu.physiology.org/content/269/1/R173.short
History of daylight savings time : timeanddate.com
https://www.timeanddate.com/time/dst/history.html
Dawn simulation treatment of winter depression: a controlled study
http://ajp.psychiatryonline.org/doi/abs/10.1176/ajp.150.1.113
http://www.amazinghealthfacts.org/Portals/8/AH_Sunlight_preview.pdf’ver=2012-10-24-171652-683

What Is Your True Age, According To Your Mind?

March 5, 2017 by Power of Positivity

We all have our actual age, and then we have something called our “mental age.” What is mental age, you ask? Basically, our mental age relates to how we think, act, and talk, regardless of our birthday. In other words, some people might call you an old soul if you act older than your age, or a young soul if you act younger than your age.

Today, we’ve put together a little quiz for you to test your mental age. Don’t take it too seriously though; there’s no passing or failing here! Just answer the questions as honestly as you can, and read on to the bottom for your results!

What Is Your Age, According To Your Mind?

1. What color pops out at you most in this image?

A. Dark brown

B. Light brown

C. Green

2. How about this one?

A. Black

B. Light brown

C. Orange/yellow

3. Which is the dominant color in this photo, to you?

A. Blue

B. Green

C. Orange

4. What color stands out the most here?

A. Green

B. Red

C. Yellow

5. I think you get the idea now. How about this one?

A. Green

B. Brown

C. Pink

6. How about here?

A. Dark Green

B. Lighter Green

C. Red

7. What color stands out most here?

A. Orange

B. Yellow

C. Green

8. Last question, we promise. What color is most prominent here?

A. Red

B. Orange

C. Green

Now, for what you’ve been waiting for: the results!

If you chose mostly A:

You’re an old soul. Your mental age is somewhere around 75-80. You’ve been called wise beyond your years by your friends and family, and they often go to you to seek advice about personal matters. You feel like you’ve been on this planet before. And you don’t really relate to most of what goes on here. You prefer to spend time by yourself doing quiet activities such as writing, reading, walking in nature, or gardening. You love the great outdoors, and find the most peace there.

If you chose mostly B:

You’re a vibrant, outgoing person, and prefer being around people. Your mental age is around 35-40. You have a fairly young spirit, but have a maturity about you that helps you remain balanced in life. You do enjoy the social scene. But you don’t allow yourself to go overboard when it comes to going out. You also take care of responsibilities. Perhaps you enjoy decorating your home, and allowing your creativity to flourish in whatever you do. You likely have a leadership role at work, because you do very well in dealing with people and taking the reigns when you need to. You stand out in the crowd, and you carry yourself very confidently.

If you chose mostly C:

You’re a very young soul. You have a mental age of around 5-10. You don’t take life too seriously. Instead, you feel compelled to follow your intuition and heart wherever they may lead you. You don’t really get along with people your age, and actually find yourself playing with the little ones whenever it comes to choosing between them and the adults. You just don’t have much to talk about with older people, because you feel like you came here to simply play, laugh, and love. People are drawn to you for your infectious smile and laugh, and your ability to see the bright side of everything and cheer others up when they’re feeling down.

What About a Combination?

If you chose a combination of answers: Eh, no worries. Your mental age likely changes depending on the seasons. Sometimes you feel like a kid, sometimes you feel like an old man/woman, and sometimes you feel somewhere in between. That’s perfectly normal, and most of us probably feel this way.

Lao Tzu’s Four Spiritual Rules Of Living

March 5, 2017 by Power of Positivity

Lao Tzu, one of the greatest Chinese masters to live many centuries ago, created the Four Cardinal Virtues, or rules of living. When practiced, they can provide a life of true peace and purpose. Lao Tzu believed that centering one’s life around these virtues would allow one to access true wisdom from the universe and align oneself with Source energy.

“When you succeed in connecting your energy with the divine realm through high awareness and the practice of undiscriminating virtue, the transmission of the ultimate subtle truths will follow.” Lao Tzu

Lao Tzu means ‘Old Master,’ and many believed he had attained the highest state of consciousness available to man, which would make him a God-realized being. The Four Cardinal Virtues in the Tao Te Ching a religious text full of Taoist teachings and principles. The Tao (also known as the Way or the Dao) contains ancient universal wisdom in a very cryptic yet profound format. It invites seekers of wisdom to go within and find spirituality through their own interpretations of the book.

If you seek answers to life’s questions and want to impart on a spiritual journey, you might want to refer to Lao Tzu’s ancient teachings to help guide you through the world’s chaos into a place of true peace.

Here are Lao Tzu’s spiritual rules for living:

“To realize the constancy and steadiness in your life is to realize the deep nature of the universe. This realization is not dependent on any transitory internal or external condition, rather it is an expression of one’s own immutable spiritual nature. The only way to attain the Universal Way is to maintain the integral virtues of the constancy, steadiness and simplicity in one’s daily life.” – Lao Tzu

1. Reverence for all Life

The first cardinal rule states that we should respect all life forms in the creation and not seek to dominate or control them. We first must love and honor ourselves, and then this love will flow outwardly toward all beings. In this world, we must depend on other life forms for sheer survival, which means we must treat them with respect, kindness, and gratitude. Lao Tzu believed we can all live in peace and harmony if we remember this spiritual rule of living first.

2. Natural Sincerity

This virtue manifests as honesty, simplicity, and authenticity. It states to stay true to who you are and not allow outside forces to sway you. Own your true nature, and don’t let others tell you who to be. Once we can come into a place of realness and sincerity, we can begin to understand what we need to remain happy and peaceful, and we can extend this to include others who might struggle along their path. Live in your truth, and everything else will fall into place. Plus, you’ll inspire others along the way to also show their true selves and live authentically. Allow your thoughts and actions to align, and you’ll come to know the meaning of sincerity.

3. Gentleness

In the world we live in today, we greatly need this virtue to be practiced more often. Gentleness means being kind to all life and not coming from a place of egoistic desires. When we practice gentleness, we give up the need to be right because being kind is more important than being correct. When we’re sensitive to other people’s needs and throw away the desire to control or dominate them, we can live in harmony with one another. Many people mistake being gentle and kind as weak, but this is only because we live in a world full of inflated egos. Practice gentleness, and you’ll awaken yourself and the world to what truly matters.

“Gentleness generally implies that you no longer have a strong ego-inspired desire to dominate or control others, which allows you to move into a rhythm with the universe. You cooperate with it, much like a surfer who rides with the waves instead of trying to overpower them. Gentleness means accepting life and people as they are, rather than insisting that they be as you are. As you practice living this way, blame disappears and you enjoy a peaceful world.” – Wayne Dyer

“My religion is very simple, my religion is kindness.” – Dalai Lama

4. Supportiveness

This virtue implies that we must support all life forms, including ourselves. When we first attend to supporting ourselves, we can more easily help others we encounter along our life’s journey. This final cardinal virtue states to love and serve all, regardless of what we can get from it. We can shift from a place of receiving into a place of giving without wondering what we can get in return. This virtue comes naturally to us, but this world we’ve been born into tells us to focus on ourselves and become happier. In reality, many people do not feel fulfilled following this path. So, by putting ourselves aside and living to serve others, we may find a life of true purpose and joy by striving to make other people’s lives a little easier.

“The greatest joy comes from giving and serving, so replace your habit of focusing exclusively on yourself and what’s in it for you. When you make the shift to supporting others in your life, without expecting anything in return, you’ll think less about what you want and find comfort and joy in the act of giving and serving.” Wayne Dyer

Let these four virtues fragrance your life, and notice the grace and ease that will come your way. Each one of these virtues brings in the way of being that is light, graceful and flowing and will help you shed destructive, self-defeating patterns that sabotage your inner peace and happiness.

“The four cardinal virtues are a road map to the simple truth of the universe. To revere all of life, to live with natural sincerity, to practice gentleness, and to be in service to others is to replicate the energy field from which you originated.” – Dr. Wayne Dyer

10 Tips For Creating More Happiness In Your Life

March 5, 2017 by Power of Positivity

I think it’s safe to say that we all could use a little more happiness in our lives. We spend so much time searching for this seemingly elusive feeling, but usually come up empty-handed. So, how can we fix this tiresome pattern of searching but never finding? How can we truly break the cycle of unhappiness and frustration, and move into a place of bliss and freedom?

Well, we don’t claim to have all the answers here, but making a few simple lifestyle changes can make a world of difference. We have so much power in our minds to actually create happiness, so we want to help you realize this gift and utilize it to your full potential.

In this article, we’ll discuss a few helpful ways to create more happiness in your life, starting today.

10 Tips for Creating More Happiness In Your Life

1. Find happiness by releasing the things you cannot change.

“If a problem is fixable, if a situation is such that you can do something about it, then there is no need to worry. If it’s not fixable, then there is no help in worrying. There is no benefit in worrying whatsoever.” – Dalai Lama

Simply put, worrying does nothing except add more stress to your life. If you can fix something, then do not worry about it, but come up with solutions instead. If you cannot fix it, then don’t worry about it. Easier said than done, we know, but writing down the worries on your mind can help to alleviate them.

Make a list each day of the things that worry you, and then decide how many of those you can actually do something about. If you cannot feasibly change something, then cross it off your list. Take the problems left on your list, and come up with actionable steps you can take to greatly reduce those stressors. Once you can see all of this on paper, you can begin to sort out all the thoughts in your mind and compartmentalize them so they don’t seem so overwhelming.

2. Move your body for greater happiness.

It’s been said over and over again by countless scientists and researchers that we MUST exercise in order to remain healthy. There’s no way around this, unfortunately, but the key is to find some sort of exercise that you actually enjoy doing. Something that doesn’t feel like drudgery, in other words. Maybe you don’t know what you even like to do in terms of exercise, but the fun is in the process of figuring this out! Stay away from things you already know you won’t be able to stick to, and focus on trying new forms of exercise that you can at least tolerate.

Many people enjoy taking Zumba classes, for instance, because they still burn a ton of calories, yet you can have fun doing it in a group setting. Or, if you need to let out some aggression while getting a workout, try out kickboxing classes. If you enjoy the outdoors and being on the water, try kayaking. We have endless choices for exercise, but it’s up to you to decide what type of movement and activity you can commit to on a regular basis.

3. Make better dietary choices.

As you probably already know, you can’t out-exercise a poor diet. As much of a perfect world as that would be, our bodies simply cannot process certain foods efficiently. We, too, are animals, and we require certain vitamins and minerals in order to function optimally. Highly processed, overly sugary or salty foods are hard for our bodies to break down, and in terms of nutrition, they tend to have very little. Stick to mostly whole foods, and limit consumption of red meats, sugary or salty foods, alcohol, and other substances that have little nutritional value.

Look to what grows naturally on this planet, and fuel your body with that. It might take discipline, but the health benefits you will notice are going to be worth it, one thousand times over.

4. Practice mindfulness.

In our crazy, fast-paced world, we can easily become imbalanced and out of touch with ourselves. No matter what you have going on in life, you must take time to simply breathe and focus on the present moment. Even if you don’t like meditation, you can practice mindfulness at any given moment of your day without having to sit cross-legged on the floor in a quiet room away from society. You can bring awareness to your mind and body at any point during your day; in a work meeting, in the car on the way home, at the grocery store, during your workout, etc. Mindfulness simply means becoming aware of your thoughts and centering yourself within the present moment.

Once you practice this more often, it will come more naturally to you, and you’ll feel much more relaxed and balanced as a result.

5. Get rid of clutter to boost happiness.

A cluttered outer world becomes a cluttered inner world, so try out minimalism in order to clear out unnecessary items and bring more space into your environment. Plus, you could sell some of the things you don’t want, which would put more money in your pocket, too. We all just want more space, both mentally and physically, so one of the easiest and most rewarding ways to achieve this goal is to get rid of material items.

Creating more space in your environment will allow you to have more space in your mind, as well. Plus, you won’t have the burden of having to maintain and pay for all of the items you used to own, which will eliminate a great deal of stress.

6. Start appreciating the little things in life.

One main reason many people cannot create happiness is that they focus so much on what they don’t have, that they lose sight of what is already in their possession. Even if you own nothing, you can appreciate the miracle of being alive. You can be thankful for being above ground and having air to breathe, water to drink, and food to eat.

At the end of our lives, we won’t remember all of the cool gadgets we bought or the fancy houses we owned. We will remember our relationships with others, and the quality of life we lived. So, instead of always wanting more, learn to be happy with less. Be IN this world, but not OF it. It still holds true that the best things in life are free, so don’t let society tempt you with the illusions of happiness they want to sell to you.

7. Volunteer your time helping others.

We create much of our own unhappiness by dwelling on ourselves and our own problems. One easy fix for this is to give back to our world so that we can become a little less burdened by ourselves, and help others along the way. We’re all just walking each other home, so don’t get so caught up in your own world that you forget about the world outside yourself that desperately needs help, too.

8. Try new things.

Much unhappiness breeds from boredom and complacency, so to combat this, start changing things up a little. If you’ve always wanted to learn martial arts, look for a class in your area and try it out. We are our greatest obstacle, so stop letting your mind tell you what you can and cannot do. You are your own limit, and the only way to move past it is to challenge it, and go after what you want even if you have insecurities or doubts about what you can accomplish. Once life starts to feel dull and mundane, it’s time to start doing things that you enjoy again. Don’t be afraid to step outside of your comfort zone, because once you do, you’ll start developing a whole new sense of self-confidence and break the cycle of unhappiness as well.

9. Disconnect to reconnect.

As you have probably already noticed, we’ve become a very disconnected society. Sure, we’re more connected to each other in the virtual world, but we’re growing apart faster than ever in the real world. We spend most of our days engrossed in various screens, from our TVs to our phones to our laptops. When did we let it get to this? Our greatest asset in life is not our online image or status, but our real-life friends, family, and lovers. We must rely on other people in order to survive, so creating distance from them by way of social media and other online distractions only separates us further from what we need to truly be happy.

Learn to put down the technology and talk to the people around you. We are social animals, and this hasn’t changed since the birth of early humans. We need each other, so don’t let the trends of today take away from the connections you share with others.

10. Get lost so you can find yourself.

Remember when you were a little kid running through fields of sunflowers, splashing in puddles after a rainstorm, and exploring the woods behind your house for hours on end? You didn’t have to be somewhere at a certain time, except at the dinner table in time for supper. You could get lost in nature and explore to your heart’s content, and you loved every minute of it. So, why can’t you do that now? On a day when you have time, drive to a nature spot you’ve always wanted to explore, and lose yourself once again. Run through the forest, jump in the river, lay in the sunshine among a bed of soft grass, let the wind whip through your hair, and enjoy the natural world like you used to, before you forgot about the importance of playtime.

Your inner child is calling out to you, so it’s time to answer its calls and be a little kid again, if only for a day.

How To Contact Your Guardian Angel

March 4, 2017 by Kristen Lawrence

Guardian angel, spirit guide, spirit animal, higher self – whatever you want to call it, more people than ever wish to contact these otherworldly beings. Let’s face it; life on Earth can seem downright exhausting, confusing, and terrifying at times. But, learning to connect with your guardian angel can help you navigate the turbulent waters and sail to smoother seas once again.

These times can feel very isolating and scary, but our guardian angels want us to know that they are here with us and can help guide us along our unique paths. Maybe you have tried to contact your guardian angels before to no avail. On the other hand, perhaps you are interested in the spirit world but haven’t tried making connections yet.

10 Ways to Connect With Your Guardian Angel

No matter your situation, we will discuss some ways to connect with your guardian angel below.

1. Pay Attention to Your Physical Environment and How You React to It

Guardian angels like to communicate with us through physical sensations at times, so you don’t need to do anything except take note of how you feel. For example, if you start to get goosebumps on your skin for no apparent reason or feel a presence near you, it might be your guardian angel attempting to contact you.

When something in your physical environment occurs without you being able to pinpoint the source, recognize that it could very well be a spirit guide. If we pay attention to our surroundings and focus on the sensations we feel, we can have a better chance of contacting our guardian angel.

2. Meditate and Ask Your Guardian Angel to Reveal Themselves

Our guardian angels contact us in a different realm, so it can take time to receive their messages in our denser reality. However, meditation provides an excellent medium to get in touch with your guide, as this practice increases your vibration. This allows you to access higher realms yourself. During your meditation, ask your guardian angel(s) to make themselves known to you. They might respond immediately, or it could take some time, depending on your readiness to receive the messages.

Guardian angels often don’t make themselves known unless we initiate contact with them, and meditation allows them a way to communicate with us on Earth. During meditation, we can block out worldly distractions and focus on just ‘being’ and receiving messages as they come in.

3. Pay Attention to Repeating Numbers

According to Doreen Virtue, seeing 11:11 frequently means that your guardian angel wants to send you a message from the higher realms. It also means that your thoughts have begun manifesting into reality very quickly. The more you notice repeating numbers, especially 1’s, the stronger the connection between you and your guardian angel.

Learn to slow down and pay attention to these signs, as more and more people notice repeating numbers these days. This shows that our angels, or whatever you’d like to call them, are more desperate than ever to make contact with us.

4. Notice Messages in Songs You Hear or Other Types of Media

Also, if you happen to hear the same song on the radio every time you get in the car, pay attention to its meaning and how it may pertain to your life. Our guides often like to communicate with us through music on the radio, believe it or not. We quickly understand the frequency of music, so this may explain why guardian angels use it to send messages.

In addition, your guardian angels may talk to you through books or TV shows. Perhaps you feel drawn to a specific passage in the book you’re reading or relate deeply to a specific scene in a show. Spirit guides don’t discriminate in how they speak to us, as they know that we sometimes enjoy escaping into fantasy worlds.

5. Ask Your Guardian Angel to Communicate in Your Dreams

They also love to relay messages to us in our dreams since we have entered another reality and don’t have distractions left and right from daily life. In our restful state, we become much easier to contact. Before going to sleep each night, ask them to visit in your dreams, and make sure to write down anything you remember the following day.

Your dream will vary depending on what messages or signs your guardian angel needs to deliver to you. Don’t feel alarmed if you have a bad dream, though; it still offers an essential meaning to your life’s journey.

6. Pray for Their Assistance in Your Life

Doreen Virtue, a well-known psychic, angel healer, and motivational speaker, says: “No angel shall interfere with a human’s life unless asked, with the sole exception of a life-threatening emergency” in her book, Angel Therapy. Just like in real life, to receive help from our angels, we must ask for it first.

As long as you have a genuine need and desire to connect with your spirit guide, they will make contact with you and offer assistance. Remember, they want to help you, so don’t hesitate to call on them for support when you need it most.

7. Cultivate a Relationship With Your Guardian Angel

Just as you put effort into your Earthly relationships, your connection with heavenly beings also requires cultivation. Before work or school each day, take a few moments to pray or talk with your spirit guides. If you form a relationship with these exalted beings, they will make their presence more obvious in your life.

8. Work on Your Spirituality

It’s difficult to contact angels if you have no connection to your spiritual side. Whether you pray, meditate, do yoga, or practice mindfulness, it’s crucial to develop your spirituality. This will make your energy field more open and receptive to any contact from spiritual beings.

9. Surrender to the Cosmic Order

Creation follows specific laws that make life on Earth possible; however, when people don’t adhere to the laws of nature, discord ensues. If you want to connect more with guardian angels, you should try to align with the spiritual laws of the universe.

Show kindness to others, practice minimalism, give more than you take, and do some form of meditation to cultivate your spirituality. If you surrender to the higher ways of existence rather than following your ego, you will feel more peace in your daily life.

10. Trust Your Spirit Guides

If you surrender to the cosmic law, the next step is to trust your guides and the messages they send you. They won’t lead you astray; even if a situation seems difficult or scary, your companions have your best interest at heart. We came to Earth to learn vital lessons and work out some of our karma. So, our guides already know what path we should take to become our highest selves. Please put your full trust in the universe because it won’t give you anything you can’t handle.

3 Signs Your Guardian Angel is Nearby

Now that you have an idea of how to reach out to spiritual beings let’s look at how to know when they arrive.

1. You feel comforted and safe all of a sudden.

Maybe you’ve been feeling stressed or disconnected in life lately. However, if you suddenly feel comfort or love pass through you, your spirit guides might be nearby. They want the best for you and hate seeing you suffer. If you have tuned yourself to the frequency of the angelic realms, you can quickly feel the presence of spiritual beings.

2. A butterfly lands near you, or you find other objects like a white feather.

Particular objects and animals have a spiritual significance. For instance, many cultures believe the butterfly symbolizes transformation or reincarnation throughout the world. If one lands on you, it might mean your guardian angels want to send you a message. Perhaps they wish for your spiritual transformation and growth as you enter a new chapter in life.

White feathers can also signify the presence of a loving spirit, as these feathers represent the white wings of angels. They symbolize purity and beauty, two qualities that every spiritual being embodies.

3. You get chills or goosebumps.

Sometimes spirit guides will make themselves known physically. You might get goosebumps on your neck or shoulders if they’re nearby, as their presence causes a vibrational change in the atmosphere. Also, you might feel a tingling on the crown of your head if a benevolent being is with you.

Final Thoughts on Ways to Contact Your Spirit Guides

If you’re a spiritual person, you will want to connect with higher beings to receive important messages. Whether you pray, meditate or practice mantras, you can begin making contact with higher realms with a personal practice. By forming a relationship with these heavenly beings, it will become easier to recognize their presence in your life.

You will start noticing subtle signs of their friendship, such as white feathers or butterflies nearby. They may direct your attention to certain songs on the radio or come into your dreams to contact you. No matter how they connect with you, it’s a life-changing moment when a guardian angel appears in your life.

Weekly tips, affirmations, and small actions to feel your best.

Every day is a day to shine. Shine on!