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5 Life Lessons We Only Learn Through Grief

June 25, 2022 by Zane Landin

Anyone who’s experienced grief can attest it is one of the hardest things anyone can endure – whether expecting the loss or not. Some describe it as an incredibly dynamic assemblage of feelings where the bereaved face a wide range of emotions rather than just one. Depending on the circumstances and relationship, some people will feel sad, happy, nostalgic, angry, and even peaceful. It can be a significant hodgepodge. There is no one right way to grieve. Everyone will feel differently since the person’s relationship with the deceased is personal and unique, but still there are resources that offer grief counseling for any person that needed.

Even though it is not something necessarily meticulously thought about, when people encounter grief, they change and develop a degree of cathartic self-knowledge when someone passes away. Their death gives them an unfortunate revelation to reflect on the relationship, how it will change, and how the bereaved will move forward. It is an arduous, lifelong process, but here are some life lessons that you can learn from grief.

Life Lessons We Learn From Our Grief

1 – Appreciate Every Day You Have

When someone passes away, we enter a new reality without that person. It causes us to think deeply about what life is. Even though the phrase “life is short” is somewhat a cliche at this point, it is entirely accurate. People can easily take life for granted as it just passes them day by day. It is easy to do because we become swamped with other aspects of our life. When someone you are close with passes away, you learn how your life changes without them. You now must live your life without them. You experience constant reminders of what they brought you. Especially for those who’ve lost someone unexpectedly, life is not guaranteed tomorrow. Living life to the fullest is a critical philosophy and lesson learned from grief because it is entirely possible to lose someone instantly.

2 – Grief Proves How Change is Inevitable

The recent pandemic taught us to embrace uncertainty. From the unrelenting conditions people have had to live in, the number of people who have passed away, and the tension of a long-lived medical pandemic.

In general, throughout life, it is entirely normal to change. People often fear the process of change, but it is something that we must all embrace. How can the world progress if we don’t constantly challenge ourselves and each other? It is irrational to fear the unknown because it is inevitable. It is impossible to avoid change. The same goes for when someone passes away.

You may never be the same person again, and that is okay. You are now on a different wavelength. There is no reason to add the weight of the pressure of expecting yourself to stay the same. You may reach a stillness, a prolonged pause. Your perspective of life and death may significantly shift too. You may ponder the meaning of life and why death happens. Embrace your new self.

3 – Love the Ones Around You

The loss leaves a massive void in our hearts when someone passes away. The person who substantially shaped our identity is gone, so it will feel like a piece of our identity is missing. While we may never fill that void again, their death reminds us how important love is. For the people around you, take the time to love them because you never know when you won’t have them anymore. This doesn’t mean you won’t have difficult times with them moving forward but try to be more forgiving and loving. It can be incredibly hard, but as the first lesson, life is too short to focus on things that don’t matter in the long run.

We will all experience grief in our lives, and there are countless lessons that we can take away from this overwhelming process. These are essential lessons to think about before it happens, but they will be different for everyone.

4 – Grief Teaches Us That Vulnerability is Strength

When someone passes away, you learn a great deal about yourself. You might even surprise yourself with how emotionally resilient you are. You need to give yourself the space to experience everything for your healing. Don’t let anyone tell you how to process your emotions. Several societal and cultural messages have instilled in us to dismiss or ignore these emotions. Vulnerability has been seen for the longest time as a weakness, but it is a strength that allows us to heal, love, and support others.

Ignoring our emotions will leave us fragmented and can even further traumatize us. Strong feelings have been viewed as problematic, but truthfully, emotions contain such a rich value. It is difficult to express your feelings in public openly, but grief and mourning allow you to do so without repercussions. This should apply to every aspect of our lives. Vulnerability is valuable, and it makes us stronger and closer to the ones we care about. Appreciate your feelings, express them, and give other people the space to be vulnerable.

5 – Life is a Process

As mentioned in the beginning, we may feel grief in different waves. You never really know when those feelings will hit you. This cycle is very similar to how life works. This teaches us life is a process, and we should strive to appreciate the moments it brings. Life would be easier if we had control of everything. It will never be on a linear path. Things are constantly changing. For the well-being of people, it is helpful to accept the things we cannot change and act on what we can control, like the love we can share with the world.

It would be much easier if things were planned and determined, but we don’t have that luxury. The passing of someone shows that life is a process. Life is about experiencing the “moments of happiness” because those positive moments matter. Don’t focus on always trying to be okay and happy. Take it one day at a time. You will achieve more inner peace when you give yourself time and break away from those expectations.

Final Thoughts: Connecting Grief to Life Lessons

Everything connects because each lesson seamlessly overlaps with one another. Concluding, grief is very complex and hard to fully grasp until you have experienced it with someone you were close to. Unfortunately, it is something we will each face in our lives, and there are countless life lessons that we can learn from this overwhelming process. Everyone will learn something different, and these are essential lessons to think about before it happens.

3 Emotional Wounds Children With Abandonment Issues Carry Into Adulthood

June 25, 2022 by Lakeisha Ethans

Are you often afraid of people leaving you? Do you need a lot of validation from those around you? Do you struggle with commitment, or are you too quick to commit? Any of these things can mean that you have abandonment issues.

Like many severe patterns that are harmful in adulthood, abandonment issues often have their roots in childhood. The environment you grow up in plays such a massive role in the person you become. Thus, unlearning what you learned as a kid can be very difficult.

But how does this work? How do seemingly unrelated issues you face as a child lead to toxic patterns when you grow up? Understanding why and how this happens can help you to overcome these hurdles. Here’s how childhood abandonment issues carry to adulthood.

1. How Children Develop Abandonment Issues

In an ideal situation, a child’s home environment is safe and secure, and their needs are met well by their parental figures. Sadly, this isn’t always the case. In fact, some kids do wind up in situations where they learn the concept of abandonment at an early age.

Very young children often don’t fully understand this concept, but they do know the negative feelings that they experience due to it. Their brains are aware that something is wrong and will put up protective measures on a subconscious level.

To survive this, children gain coping mechanisms that are often unhealthy to handle the abandonment they face. They may also develop a mental illness that dysregulates their capacity to process and manage emotions to stay sane.

Risk factors for abandonment fear in children include the following:

· Loss Of Parental Figures or Family Members

Children commonly feel abandonment when they lose parental figures or other loved ones in an unexpected or challenging way. This is frequently attributed to a parent leaving the family, but it can also occur due to loss through death. It may also happen when a sibling leaves home and cannot contact or maintain a relationship with the rest of the family.

· Death

In the same vein, the death of someone in a child’s life, such as a friend or figure they look up to, can lead to abandonment issues as the child struggles to understand that someone can be taken away suddenly for reasons beyond their comprehension.

· Neglect Can Cause Abandonment Issues

Often overlooked, child neglect is a form of abuse that involves a child’s needs being ignored. Dealing with that neglect can cause a child to feel unwanted or as though they cannot rely on anyone, triggering abandonment issues. There are many forms of neglect, and they don’t just involve insufficient basic needs. A child may be physically provided with food, clothing, entertainment, education, and physical safety but may not receive affection, which is still neglect.

· Any Other Form Of Abuse

All abuse can result in abandonment issues at any age. Children subjected to abuse can have numerous reasons to develop a fear of abandonment.

· Moving Constantly

Constantly moving from house to house and having to lose and make friends can always affect children negatively. They may have trouble investing emotionally in relationships or might develop an unhealthy understanding of the fleeting nature of relationships. This is also true for kids in the foster system who move often.

· Abandonment Issues Can Impact Poverty

Living without a lot of resources can cause the development of a scarcity mindset or the idea that there is a limited number of available things that must be hoarded or used sparingly. A child may be afraid that all items in their life are limited in this way.

· Stress

High-stress environments can create a lot of anxiety in children, exacerbating any usual fears and turning them into extreme ones. It certainly doesn’t help matters that many high-stress environments also do not meet other needs of children at the same time. This means that the stress makes an already bad situation much worse.

· Any Traumatic Events

Any traumatic event in a child’s life, including unpredictable and uncontrollable ones, can trigger abandonment issues. These events can include natural disasters, injuries, crimes, or anything that instills a fear that they will lose people or things they treasure.

2. How Abandonment Issues Manifest In Attachment Styles

We understand how childhood affects adulthood through several different psychological theories. The one that’s most relevant here is attachment theory. This theory explains that infants and young children are naturally attached to those they’re exposed to who are responsive in social situations with them. This usually refers to primary caregivers.

As they grow, kids begin to learn social actions from their interactions with their caregivers. They start to use their attachment figures as an example of how to explore interaction. The responses of these figures then shape children’s beliefs, thoughts, and expectations for their future relationships, say studies.

Many people who grow up in bad homes find themselves in bad relationships, often repeating the same patterns they experienced in childhood. It’s easy to see how abandonment issues become a part of a child’s attachment style as they grow. For example, if their caregivers are emotionally unavailable, the child will learn to interact with others, thus growing up to be emotionally detached.

Children who have abandonment issues develop insecure attachment styles that affect them as adults. These insecure attachment styles may be any of the researched techniques, which are:

· Avoidant Attachment

Adults with the avoidant attachment style do precisely what the style’s name suggests. They handle their abandonment issues by avoiding situations where someone could leave them. This means they’re often highly reluctant to get close to the people around them, fearing commitment and vulnerability. They may not trust others and prefer not to open up, become withdrawn or distant, and have trouble forming meaningful relationships.

· Anxious Attachment

Adults with the anxious attachment style cope with abandonment issues by developing highly codependent relationships. They become very needy and have trouble forming healthy relationships. They are very insecure and latch onto the people around them with intensity. Further, they often mask their emotions, viewing conflict and unusual behavior as signs that they will soon be abandoned. Essentially, because they fear abandonment, anxiously attached individuals need constant reassurance and validation that they aren’t being left, often with counterproductive results.

· Disorganized Attachment

The disorganized attachment style is also called fearful-avoidant attachment because it combines the struggles of both anxious and avoidant styles. Adults with this attachment style can struggle with empathy and vulnerability and may not feel comfortable with any form of intimacy. They can behave in erratic and unpredictable ways, acting “hot and cold” as they swing between anxious clinginess and fearful avoidance.

3. How Abandonment Issues Manifest In Adulthood Relationships

Your attachment style will determine precisely how your abandonment issues manifest, say studies. Here are some possible signs of abandonment issues that you may exhibit:

· Attachment To Toxic Relationships

Even when a relationship becomes toxic, you may not want to leave because you don’t want to lose the person you’re dating. Your abandonment issues mean that you’re terrified of being alone and would rather be miserable with someone than happier without them.

· Abandonment Issues Reveal an Excessive Need For Validation

You may constantly worry that the people around you will leave you. You may need or demand validation, often by urging partners or friends to make grand statements about their devotion to you. However, you may still not believe them and accuse them of lying. Or you may only be satisfied for a short time before needing validation again.

· Getting Very Attached Very Quickly

When you’re afraid of someone abandoning you, you may have an urge to grab onto someone you don’t want to lose and cling to them as hard as you can. You may come on too strong to those around you and profess love for people you’ve just met because you’re trying to prevent abandonment. Ironically, this usually pushes people away.

· Insecurity

You’re constantly worried that people will leave you. You think you’re not good enough for the people in your life. You become jealous very quickly and tend to compare yourself to other people in the lives of the people you love.

· Jumping From Relationship To Relationship

When you have abandonment issues, you might be afraid of intimacy and commitment. As a result, you avoid settling down for too long. The thought of someone knowing you so deeply frightens you, as you’re worried that the other person will leave you and leave you feeling hurt and alone. As such, you’d instead end the relationship first to avoid the pain of someone else ending it with you.

· People-Pleasing Behavior

To prevent people from leaving you, you may resort to excessive people-pleasing behavior. This will often occur at the expense of your health, time, and happiness, breeding resentment and damaging relationships further. This only furthers the cycle. It can even make you believe that you have to get better at people-pleasing each time another relationship falls apart because of it.

· Relationship Sabotage

When your feelings for a partner become very serious, you may become so afraid of losing them or them abandoning you that you sabotage the relationship. You’ll behave irrationally to push someone away and escape the relationship.

Final Thoughts on How Childhood Abandonment Issues Carry to Adulthood

Childhood abandonment issues are born from adverse environments where a child’s needs are not met. This can happen for various reasons, ranging from trauma from the loss of a loved one to severe abuse. These environments then set the stage for developing unhealthy attachment patterns that you bring with you into adulthood, manifesting in toxic and complex ways.

Abandonment issues can be complicated to overcome. But it is possible to recover from them and learn secure attachment styles. Professional help in the form of therapy is one of the best ways to work on fear of abandonment. On top of that, taking care of yourself and being kind to yourself is also an essential step in unlearning these harmful patterns. You’re not alone, and you can face, manage, and heal from abandonment issues!

3 Reasons Strong People Move on Without Closure

June 25, 2022 by Lakeisha Ethans

Cognitive closure is a term referring to a social psychological concept. In essence, closure refers to one person’s desire for an answer or explanation that reduces or removes ambiguity from a scenario or thought. However, you likely heard about closure most when ending a relationship.

The former definition is a relatively scientific, expert-agreed definition.

But a sudden breakup with no concrete explanation can cause someone to seek out their former partner in hopes of understanding why the split occurred. It’s also a familiar concept for abuse survivors, who may want the satisfaction of speaking to their abusers one last time later in life.

But is this process necessary? It’s referred to as a “need.” The term “need” here mainly refers to the natural human desire to seek information. This type of motivation stems from survival. Humans want to know things concretely to learn and prepare for the future.

But the truth is that closure is not truly necessary for someone to move on. Some people learn that closure is meaningless and carry on with their lives. Some people are also simply not inclined to seek closure to begin with. Here’s the psychology behind why strong people won’t demand closure and will move on without you.

1. A High Need For Closure When Ending a Relationship Is Associated With Negative Traits

To some degree, it’s okay to want closure. But an extreme need for closure often arises from various negative traits. This desire is not necessarily about causation. Hinging everything on closure is born from difficult-rooted issues. Those issues are most likely to be present in those with specific traits from similar roots.

There’s an exciting study that covers this topic. It’s called “What the Need for Closure Scale measures and what it does not: Toward differentiating among related epistemic motives.”

Why Some People Do Not Require Resolution from a Former Partner

Here are some of the traits that people with a very high need for closure may also have and the possible reasons behind them:

They are more likely to make judgments based on stereotypes. This data may be because of their focus on collecting information for future use and prediction. The vast generalizations based on stereotypes are the data supply for future planning.
They are more likely to perform correspondence bias. This type of bias tends to draw unique conclusions about someone’s character based on actions that can quickly occur through generic, situational means. This may be the case because those who seek closure may try to find deeper explanations for everything they see.
They are more likely to become stuck in something they’re convinced of. If they have old information, they may be unable to assimilate new information to update their knowledge. However, this depends highly on the individual’s personality.
They are likely to make decisions based on the need for closure instead of good decision-making ability, says research. Their desire to receive closure will cause them to make rash decisions without properly thinking them through, all for closure!
They have trouble thinking creatively. The desire to know things and be aware of all information can prevent those with a high need for closure from being creative. They find themselves unable to think outside of the box because they need to know all details first.
They can struggle with cognitive complexity and critical thinking. The need to put things into boxes and get all information for an unambiguous answer can reduce their ability to consider nuance and gray areas in their quest for answers.

How This Informs Someone’s Strength

But what does this have to do with strength? Well, mentally strong people don’t usually let themselves adopt traits like this. They are likely to be more adaptable and open-minded and will try to avoid incorrect thought forms to make wiser and better decisions.

This is not to say that strong people never perform those traits! No one is perfect, and strength is about overcoming the worst effects of those traits, not eradicating them with a golden track record. Essentially, a strong person is more likely to realize that closure is not a good enough reason to compromise their wisdom and beliefs. They view ending a relationship as a chance to rise again, learn, and do better the next time.

2. True Closure Comes From Within

Closure often faces outward–on receiving a form of extrinsic validation in the form of a concrete answer from an external source. While this can be extremely helpful in some cases, such as in the event of an extenuating circumstance or tragedy, in most day-to-day applications, this isn’t the right way to seek closure.

It’s okay to desire external input and validation, of course, occasionally! But most forms of reassurance are best sought within yourself. Receiving much-desired closure will often not feel satisfying or sufficient, usually falling short of expectations and failing to click everything into place the way you’d like.

Genuine closure that puts you at peace with past circumstances can only come from within. This involves you personally accepting the ambiguity of a situation and making peace with that, allowing you to progress with your life.

Lack of Resolution from an Ex Does Not matter to a Resilient Person

It is easy to use a lack of closure as an excuse to remain stagnant in life. You stay within your comfort zone and get stuck because you rely on this external closure to propel you forward. But what if it doesn’t propel you at all? What if the closure is unsatisfying or doesn’t give you the expected answer? What if a resolution isn’t possible? Do you stay trapped forever?

What is it about this event that you need to hold onto? Do you have personal beliefs that support the concept of closure? There might be something that you fear will happen if you start moving forward without it. Are those fears valid and grounded in reality, or are they holding you back unnecessarily?

A strong person draws from their emotional resilience to move forward after ending a relationship. They focus internally and on intrinsic motivation. They don’t need closure from an external source, as they know it will not be as powerful as the closure they can give themselves.

Strong people also know that self-improvement is the best way to overcome pain. They will eventually no longer feel any desire for that closure, as mentioned above, by working on themselves.

3. An Acceptable Way To Request Closure If You’re Ending a Relationship

The keyword we’ve discussed here is “demand.” Asking for closure in itself isn’t always a bad thing. Even strong people may try to see if closure is possible before deciding to move on because they also believe it’s better to have tried than not tried at all! When received healthily, closure can be a beautiful and powerful thing. It’s a chance to learn and grow with new information and close and open life chapters.

What you need to do is to avoid hinging your every move on this closure. It would be best if you weren’t so focused on it that it becomes one of your biggest motivators. And you definitely shouldn’t pressure other people into giving you closure, even if they wronged you and, to some degree, perhaps owe you an explanation.

Ending a Relationship?

A strong person will request resolution in the following ways:

They will explain their interest in closure with open, honest communication and neutral language that focuses on their feelings, not on accusing the person they’re speaking to.
They will end their request with an open invitation for the other person to provide closure. In other words, they will put the onus on the other individual to respond after saying their piece. For example, they might say, “Please let me know when you’d be ready to discuss this.”
They don’t use pushy language or vague terms. They don’t coerce or guilt-trip the other party into providing closure. Instead, they understand the importance of being mature in this scenario.
They don’t get their hopes up too high, retaining realistic expectations of the most likely outcome and preparing for worse results than that. Instead, they know the difference between positivity and setting themselves up for disappointment.
If the person doesn’t respond, they allow the matter to drop and respect the person’s non-answer. They accept this outcome and understand that no answer is a great one. They also don’t take this too personally and focus on themselves, not wasting time on speculation.

What’s Next?

And if closure doesn’t come, strong people don’t necessarily entirely give up on it. However, they do move on with their lives. They may hope that some closure may come, but they stay realistic about that possibility. They trust that, in the end, the information that they need to know will find its way to them when they’re ready.

Final Thoughts on Why Strong People Won’t Demand Closure After Ending a Relationship

Strong people don’t demand closure and often don’t even seek it out casually. However, this is not to say that wanting closure makes one weak. Many victims of unfavorable circumstances and harmful perpetrators need closure because they were wrongly hurt. If that describes you, you’re not weak for wanting a solid resolution.

With that being said, the fact remains that hinging your desires on psychological closure isn’t a good idea. You’ll often be unable to gain the closure you seek, no matter how much you want it. Other times, the closure you eventually get may be anticlimactic, leaving you feeling underwhelmed and even more confused.

Even when a resolution is possible and feels satisfying, focusing your life on obtaining it will leave you feeling lost once you’ve received it. External, extrinsic sources of comfort like closure often don’t measure up to the benefits of personally obtaining your closure internally by moving on.

Finally, if someone in your life you wish would get closure from you, you might want that closure. Focus on moving on in your life and self-improvement, and you’ll soon wonder why you wanted that closure. Learning to leave behind the drive for closure is incredibly powerful and will make you a stronger person.

These 18 Things Happen When a Breakthrough Is About to Happen

June 24, 2022 by Chris Butler

Are you at a point when you instinctively know that change is on the horizon? Although you have countless achievements, you may feel like something is missing. Perhaps you’re ready for a personal breakthrough.

What is a Breakthrough?

Remember in math class when you were stumped on a problem? You picked your brain and tried different formulas. Then, suddenly, you figured out the solution, and it was a moment of triumph.

Although that’s a simplified example, going to the next spiritual level in your life can be exhilarating. You open a closed door and walk into a light you’ve always desired. You may even wonder why it took you so long.

For some people, the process of mental and spiritual maturity isn’t as complicated as it is for others. The good news is that the Universe always gives you signs to notice. You don’t always have to search for your destination like a scavenger hunt.

Eighteen Things That Happen Right Before a Breakthrough

How do you know if you’re ready to reach a new level in your life? Will you wake up one day and realize the change, or is it a process? Here are eighteen signs from the Universe that your breakthrough is coming.

1. Questioning Your Belief System May Indicate an Imminent Breakthrough

One of the classic signs of a personal breakthrough is when you doubt past beliefs and traditions. Like most people, you blindly accepted what your parents and other mentors taught you as truth. Maybe some of this indoctrination turned out to be toxic.

There comes a point when you’ll feel compelled to revisit your past beliefs. Do they benefit your well-being and make you want to be a better person? If not, it may be time to discard old beliefs and traditions that are toxic or no longer serving you.

2. Tightening Your Circle of People

Everyone has a circle of family, friends, coworkers, and acquaintances. Many of these relationships overlap, and they form your support system. Your broader circle is often a revolving door of closeness, distance, and drifting apart.

You may notice this circle getting tighter right before a breakthrough. It’s easier to recognize genuine friends from those there when they need you. Time is precious, and you reserve it for those who matter in your life.

3. Connecting With Those Who are Like-Minded

Remember the old saying about birds of a feather flocking together? It’s part of the law of attraction that says you attract whatever you place in the Universe. You’ll start drawing the right folks in your circle before you level up.

Some may be acquaintances, or they may be strangers. They often are in the same place in life and share many of your dreams. Perhaps you’ll meet someone who was meant to be your mentor for self-improvement.

4. You Notice an Unusual Sense of Calm Before a Breakthrough

Have you been struggling with a lot of issues in your life? When you’re on the verge of a breakthrough, calm overcomes your mind and spirit. Although you still have many questions, you have a peace you can’t explain.

Trusting the universe allows you to take a deep breath and “be.” You send out more positive affirmations and are ready to receive the same. Your stress and anxiety levels may decrease as feelings of well-being increase.

5. Expressing More Gratitude

Many areas of your life will level up right before a personal breakthrough. An article published by UC Berkeley states that gratitude helps promote self-improvement. Instead of taking things for granted, you learn to count your blessings.

Gratitude lifts your mood and tends to make you more optimistic. Such a mindset is fertile ground for cultivating new dreams. When you’re thankful for what you have, the Universe provides you with more beautiful gifts.

6. Offering More Forgiveness and Letting Go

If you’re ready for a spiritual breakthrough, it starts by letting go of the past. Think of your self-development as a journey. How far can you travel if you’re bogged down with unnecessary luggage?

Only when you decide to release the burdens of the past can you look for a better future. When you forgive others, you’re no longer smothered by bitterness. Often, you must learn to forgive yourself before your next life phase.

7. Understanding Your Boundaries Better

Setting healthy boundaries shows how you treat others and expect to be treated. If they aren’t clearly defined, it’s a recipe for a toxic relationship. In the process of a breakthrough, it may become easier for you to set and enforce boundaries.

8. Taking Responsibility for Your Joy

Your spiritual evolution teaches you many lessons, like taking responsibility for your joy. You no longer depend on people, achievements, or possessions to do it for you.

Soon, you re-evaluate activities in your daily life. If they don’t bring you joy, why keep doing them? You stop being a people pleaser and learn that it’s unnecessary for a fulfilling life.

9. Developing More Self-Confidence Is a Sign of a Breakthrough

Isn’t it fulfilling when you finally notice the breakthrough you need? If you can do this, what other challenges can you meet? Having faith in your abilities is one of the best self-help tools.

Are you contemplating going back to school or advancing in your career? Maybe you want to change your career path altogether. Having more confidence in yourself will let you take risks.

10. Searching for More Meaning

You may never know the meaning of life, but it’s a quest that keeps you motivated. Maybe your soul has felt stagnant, and you’re just running in circles. Trusting your intuition more and allowing your Higher Self to guide you may be the inspiration you need.

11. Accepting What You Can’t Change

It’s a healing breakthrough to realize that there are things in this world you can’t change. For some unknown reason, good and evil coexist, and you learn to accept them. However, this realization gives you the self-confidence to change things within your power.

12. Craving More Solitude May Reveal a Breakthrough

According to a study published by the National Library of Medicine, solitude can put you in a more positive mood. Those precious hours of alone time may help you become more resilient. Unlike loneliness, occasional solitude has positive benefits.

Many self-help guides recommend that you spend some time alone. You can use it to meditate, journal, or rest. Being alone with yourself can help you focus more on your inner voice.

13. Having More Vivid Dreams

Are you a person who usually remembers your dreams? When a positive life change is imminent, you may have more vivid dreams than usual. Some of these dreams may be related to the next step you’re about to take.

14. Becoming Less Materialistic

You won’t be as interested in “getting more.” While there’s nothing wrong with wanting fine things, they aren’t the emphasis of your life. You become more focused on things money can’t buy, like all your intangible blessings.

You’ll also be more generous with your time and resources. Perhaps you’ll volunteer for your local food pantry or another worthy cause. You realize your blessings, and you want to give back to others.

15. Spending More Time in Nature

If you ever need a breath of inspiration, all you need is to walk outside. Something magical about the sky, trees, flowers, and woodland creatures revitalizes your soul. The closer you are to a new level in life, the more you may seek these wonders of nature.

Try to walk outside every day in the woods or a park. It’s good exercise, and it will stimulate your mind. It may inspire some new goals you want to achieve.

16. Experiencing Serendipity More Often

Is everything up to time and chance, or do things happen for a reason? Spiritual breakthroughs usually accompany coincidences that can’t be explained. The Universe tells you that things are about to change for the good.

17. Struggling with Restlessness

The human spirit longs to be challenged and to discover new things. If not, you get bored and risk a negative mindset. Your current restlessness may signify that you’re ready to walk out of faith into your next adventure.

18. More Bursts of Creativity

Positive life changes charge you physically, mentally, and spiritually. The results are bursts of creativity that express what’s difficult to put into words. You may notice a lift in your problem-solving abilities and your creative outlets.

Final Thoughts on Things That Happen Before a Breakthrough

The more you trust your inner voice, the more sensitive you’ll be to signs from the Universe. Milestones of change and maturation often mark your journey of self-development. All you need to do is trust and walk through the open door.

Psychology Explains How Too Much Clutter Holds You Back

June 24, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

If you find comfort in obtaining items, you could be holding yourself back. Collecting items might seem like a sign of doing well, or it could be a sentimental habit. Either way, you’ll be surprised to learn that too much clutter interferes with your life.

As you fill your home with items you enjoy, it can quickly lead to the habit of saving other things, too. You might place things on a shelf, forgetting about them soon after. It eventually becomes owning many things you don’t even need or want.

Look around your home and see how many items you don’t need. You likely don’t have to go far to find at least a handful of things you don’t need. Psychologists explain that too much clutter holds you back, so you must get it under control immediately.

If you ever feel burdened by too much stuff, you might need to get rid of some. You might notice that your desk has piles of papers, and drawers are full of junk. If this is the case for you, you’ll benefit from getting rid of some of it.

Clutter Holds You Back in These Ten Ways

You might be surprised to hear that clutter holds you back, but psychologists reveal it’s true. Once you know how it happens, you’ll be ready to make a beneficial change in your life.

1 – Clutter Gives You More Commitment and Obligation

The more items you know, the more commitment and obligation you have. When you have too much stuff, it adds more responsibility to your already busy life. With less clutter, you can focus on what you want to spend your time doing.

2 – You’ll Feel Stuck

When you own lots of things, it’ll make you feel stuck. Eventually, you might feel trapped because so many things keep you where you are now.

3 – It Takes Time to Manage the Clutter

By obtaining fewer things, you free up your time. You’ll have less housework and upkeep, and you’ll experience less oversight. The more stuff you have, the more time you’ll spend cleaning, dusting, putting things away, and sorting.

Having too much stuff can also slow down your daily routine. It’ll take you longer to find things and prepare for the day.

4 – It Decreases Productivity

If you start your day frantically searching for things, it doesn’t set you up for productivity. Instead, it causes you to feel unfocused, even after getting to work. The decreased productivity worsens if your desk is cluttered, too.

You’ll get less done around the house, too. It’s hard to know where to start when you have so many things to handle and deal with. It’ll quickly become overwhelming, causing you to miss out on productivity.

5 – Clutter Might Prevent You from Socializing in Your Home

If you have too much stuff, it might prevent you from entertaining in your home. Whether you’re embarrassed or don’t have the space, it could hold you back from hosting get-togethers.

Once you declutter, you’ll be excited to host for the first time. You won’t have to hide your mess because it’s already gone, giving you a sense of lightness. Another bonus is that you won’t panic about unexpected visitors because your home is always ready for guests.

6 – It Makes It Harder to Relax

Clutter makes it hard for you to feel at ease in your home. You’ll see stacks of papers, overflowing baskets, and items strewn around. When you see these things, it is hard to enjoy your time.

7 – You Could Develop Health Problems

Too much clutter can interfere with your sleep, and research shows it leads to health complications. An untidy home can cause anxious thoughts that keep you awake at night. If your bedroom is cluttered, it can intensify those anxious thoughts as you lay in bed.

Additionally, clutter tends to collect dust, triggering allergies and asthma. Dust mites are a common reason for year-round symptoms. Minimizing how much stuff you have can drastically improve your health.

8 – It Wastes Money

When you have so much stuff lying around, you waste money. Things will go bad before you use them, resulting in buying new and waste products.

Plus, you must buy storage for everything you own. If you have too much stuff, you’ll constantly have to pay for more storage.

9 – It Can Interfere with Your Relationship

Living with a partner has its challenges, and too much clutter can be one. If your house is always untidy, it could cause tension in your relationship. It can also cause disagreements over the value and usefulness of the items.

10 – It Causes Stress and Disappointment

The unused items around your house constantly remind you of what you haven’t accomplished. These items remind you of failed goals, making you feel stressed and disappointed. There’s no reason to keep the items if you aren’t using them, so go ahead and remove them.

Nine Minimalist Tips for Eliminating Clutter

Knowing how clutter holds you back is only the first step. Next, you must learn to eliminate some of the stuff you own.

1 – Ask yourself if It’s Functional

If an item isn’t functional for your lifestyle, get rid of it. You don’t need to hold onto useless things in your life. Additionally, if an item isn’t functional because it doesn’t work, you can do without it.

2 – Eliminate Things That Don’t Reflect Who You Are

What you own should reflect who you are today, not who you used to be. If your items keep you rooted in the past, it’s time to eliminate them. Keep things that help you focus on where you’re heading next.

3 – Don’t Keep Clutter Out of Guilt or Obligation

You might hesitate to get rid of things if you feel obligated to keep them. The guilt you feel at the thought of parting with it might threaten to hold you back each time.

However, urge yourself to get it over with, and you’ll soon feel better about it. You’ll quickly forget about the item and the guilt after getting rid of it.

You might convince yourself that getting rid of your late relative’s things means you didn’t love them. That thought isn’t true, though, and you know it. Separate the person from their possession, and remember that the love is still within you.

4 – Separate Items That Clutter Your Space

As you tackle the clutter in your home, you’ll need a place to start. Focus on one room at a time, and separate everything into different categories.

Have a place for items you want to keep, sell, donate, recycle, or throw away. These categories give you a place to put everything, helping you start fresh in each room.

5 – Give Everything a Home

Minimalists believe every home item should have a purpose and a place. When everything has a home, you’ll know where to put it as you tidy up. Plus, you’ll be more likely to put it where it belongs right away rather than having it float around the home.

6 – Personally Define “Enough.”

No one else can tell you how much stuff is enough. This decision is yours to make, and it’ll help you determine how much you need to eliminate. When you define what enough means, you’ll start to think about the things that truly matter.

7 – Donate Clothes

You don’t wear every item in your closet, and now is a good time to part with some clothing. If something doesn’t fit you, don’t hang onto it hoping it will soon. Instead, donate it and only keep clothing that fits you right now.

If you have multiple similar items, donate those, too. You don’t need three black t-shirts; it’ll free up some closet space.

8 – Pretend You’re a First-Time Visitor as You Look Around Your Home

You get used to how your home looks and eventually stop paying attention. The next time you come home, pretend you’re a visitor walking through the door. Focus on your first impression of the home, including the cleanliness and how you feel about the organization.

Your first impression should be your starting point for decluttering. Tackle the things you noticed first, and then start the process again.

9 – Ask a Friend to Help

Having someone help, you will make the process easier. Ask the friend to suggest some items to get rid of, and keep an open mind about their choices. If you can’t give a good reason for keeping it, follow their advice and get rid of it.

Final Thoughts on How Too Much Clutter Holds You Back

Understanding how clutter holds you back can help you make the first step to reducing it. Once you make a change, you’ll notice an improvement in your life. There are many ways clutter holds you back, but you can make a change today.

Don’t waste any time starting your decluttering project. Use the advice here to help you get started, and then follow your intuition on the rest. It might be hard to get rid of things at first, but it’ll become easier as you see how free it makes you feel.

New Research Links Apple Cider Vinegar To A Better Mood

June 24, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

Apple cider vinegar is a pantry staple with many uses and benefits. You might associate the liquid with cooking but can do much more with it. It goes far beyond the kitchen and does more than improve the taste of your food.

Recent research shows that apple cider vinegar can improve your mood and promote mental health. This fermented beverage has a history as a home remedy, but its effects on mood have only recently been discovered. While there aren’t many studies regarding the topic, the existing ones prove the benefits.

Whether you have depression or have just been in a bad mood lately, vinegar can help. Health enthusiasts swear by it, but now it can help everyone else. You’ll appreciate the health effects even if you don’t enjoy the taste.

What the Study Says About Vinegar’s Effect on Mood

Researchers from Arizona State University wanted to find out if vinegar played a role in mental health. They believed it might be related because of the gut-brain connection of apple cider vinegar. For the study, the researchers found 25 healthy college students to test.

They spent four weeks giving half of the students a placebo pill and the other half an apple cider vinegar drink. The placebo pill smelled like vinegar, so the subjects believed they had the real deal. However, the drug didn’t have acetic acid, the main active ingredient in vinegar.

Those with the ACV drink had one cup of water and two tablespoons of vinegar. They sipped on the drink each day throughout the study.

During the four-week trial, students maintained their regular diet and exercise routines. They completed questionnaires about their mood and gave urine samples before and after the study.

The Results of The Study

The results showed that the drink proved beneficial for mood and brain health. Researchers found the subjects who consumed the drink experienced a 20-34% reduction in poor moods. On the other hand, those who took the placebo experienced an increase.

The urine samples give a clue as to why apple cider vinegar improves your mood. ACV affects metabolic pathways affecting the brain. It also promotes a healthier hexosamine pathway that encourages cognitive functioning and brain health.

Additionally, drinking this vinegar improves glycine and threonine metabolism, amino acids that balance neurotransmitters. They also stimulate hormones like serotonin, a feel-good hormone.

Apple cider vinegar also improves gut health, further improving your mood. When your gut is off-balance, you won’t feel your best, and it can interfere with your mental health and well-being. ACV contains probiotic properties, encouraging good bacteria that aid many bodily functions.

This study was small and lacked diversity, but it showed promising results. Further research is necessary, but researchers are on the right path. An improved mood isn’t the only benefit of apple cider vinegar either.

Other Benefits of Apple Cider Vinegar

This liquid helps improve your mood, but it also has many other benefits. Some of the benefits include the following:

Weight Loss

Apple cider vinegar comes from apples, a fruit high in pectin. Pectin is an insoluble fiber that increases feeling full after a meal. Research shows that it can lead to people eating up to 275 fewer calories.

If you typically feel unsatisfied after a meal, mix some vinegar with water and drink it before eating. You’ll feel more satisfied and have reduced cravings later in the day. Without so many intense cravings, you’re less likely to binge on unhealthy foods.

Further studies show that consuming this liquid is associated with reduced belly fat. It is also low in calories, so you don’t have to worry about it adding to your daily count.

Growth Hormone Production

The acid helps break down protein into amino acids. Each amino acid aids in bodily processes, which’re essential for many reasons. They promote hormone creation, including growth hormone.

Releases Iron from Food

Another benefit of the acid in vinegar is that it helps release iron from your food. Iron doesn’t always release independently, but your body requires it. Your body needs iron for hemoglobin and myoglobin functioning. Hemoglobin and myoglobin carry oxygen to your cells, so you don’t want to go without iron.

Supports Healthy Blood Sugar and Glycemic Control

Apple cider vinegar helps lower blood sugar levels, and research indicates it could help with type 2 diabetes. This type of diabetes can be caused by insulin resistance or lack of insulin production, but vinegar promotes glycemic control.

Researchers studied two groups of people. One group consumed a placebo, and the other had apple cider vinegar. The small study showed that the group with apple cider vinegar experienced significantly lowered post-meal glucose levels before their meal.

However, you can’t rely on vinegar alone to treat diabetes or regulate blood sugar. You also must avoid refined carbs and sugar and follow your professional treatment plan.

Detoxes the Body

This vinegar detoxes the body as it breaks down enzymes from food. It eliminates toxins and restores your body to a healthy PH level balance. It also allows your body to absorb the enzymes from food, allowing you to take in more nutrients to replace the toxins.

Promotes Healthy Skin

Drinking a vinegar mixture each day works wonders on your skin. It controls the outbreak of acne, eliminating current breakouts and preventing future ones. Don’t apply the vinegar to your skin without diluting it with water first.

This type of vinegar also remedied dry skin and eczema in mice. It helps reestablish the natural pH balance of your skin, promoting a healthy protective barrier.

Boosts the Immune System

As bacteria become more resistant to antibiotics, scientists hunt for alternatives. Their search led them to test apple cider vinegar and its effect on the immune system. The results showed that it helps fight bacterial infections, boosting your immune system.

This research also showed that vinegar contains antimicrobial effects. It reduces inflammation, helping you overcome infections much quicker.

How to Experience the Benefits of Apple Cider Vinegar

If you want to experience the benefits, you must know how to drink them. Consuming suitable vinegar is essential, so don’t overdo it. Add only one or two tablespoons of vinegar to a glass of water.

Your water can be warm or cold, so you can have it however you like. If you don’t enjoy the taste, you can add a tablespoon of honey or a few apple pieces. You can also use lemon juice or a little cayenne pepper to mask the flavor of the vinegar.

If you still can’t drink vinegar water, you can find capsule supplements in the store. Taking capsules means you don’t have to smell or taste the liquid.

You can also implement more apple cider vinegar into your diet by using it in cooking. It can be added to salad dressings and homemade sauces, making it an easy ingredient to use.

Drink the beverage before your meals, as doing it afterward can cause gastric issues. Drinking the water every day isn’t necessary, although you can if you want to. Otherwise, you can have it every other day.

Cautionary Advice

Although apple cider vinegar benefits your mind and body, you don’t want to overconsume. You also don’t want to consume it alone, as direct consumption can have consequences. Drink it in a moderate amount, and dilute the vinegar in water.

Apple cider vinegar is a highly acidic liquid that could cause tooth erosion or a burning sensation in your mouth and throat. After you drink the vinegar water, rinse your mouth out.

You also might want to drink it through a straw if you make it a daily beverage. Using a straw prevents it from touching your teeth as much.

However, don’t brush your teeth right afterward because it could grind the acid into your tooth enamel. Wait at least thirty minutes before brushing to be safe.

Make sure to drink the beverage before a meal to avoid gastric issues. Having it afterward could delay digestion as it slows down the food so it can’t pass into the intestine. It’ll give you a stomach ache and make you feel unwell.

Additionally, avoid drinking the mixture before bed. It can cause acid reflux and esophagus irritation. You’ll want to sit upright for at least thirty minutes after having the drink.

Final Thoughts on New Apple Cider Vinegar for Your Mood

Given all the health benefits of apple cider vinegar, try the mixture. It might not be the best-tasting beverage, but you can add things to make it taste better. Additionally, you can think about the benefits of chugging the vinegar water.

Whatever way you get it down, you’ll be happy about the benefits. It promotes an improved mood, boosts physical health, and has many other benefits. It might be hard to get used to initially, but you’ll be glad you did.

Editorial note 10/02/2023: Changed reference to the skin study, noting that it was conducted on mice.

If You See a Black Butterfly, This Is What It Means

June 24, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

If you see a black butterfly, you might wonder what it means. Rest assured, you shouldn’t be afraid if you see one in your home, flying around your garden, or even landing on you.

As part of the Erebidae family, black butterflies help pollinate plants. They consume fermented fruit juice and prefer to take refuge in the shade. If you see one in your home, you’ll likely notice that they stay in the doorways and corners where it’s darker.

While often thought of as gothic and mysterious, many positive symbols are associated with a black butterfly. They signify positive change, gracious aging, and many other beneficial aspects of life.

What It Means When You See a Black Butterfly

Butterflies signify growth and transformation, as their life cycle relies heavily on both aspects. Their change takes time and isn’t easy, but it leads you to something beautiful. Black butterflies have many other symbols, too.

1 – A Black Butterfly Signifies Spiritual Awakening or Positive Life Changes

As a symbol of renewal, this butterfly species signifies spiritual awakening or positive life changes. If you encounter a black butterfly, it indicates that you will soon embrace rebirth and life transformation.

They represent a shift and encourage you to embrace change. Even when the change is beneficial, it can surprise you and cause uneasy feelings. However, if you see a black butterfly, you can find comfort knowing that the shift is for the best.

Don’t try to avoid the change, even if it isn’t easy. Instead, face the challenges that come your way because it’s the only way to grow and develop.

2 – You Might Experience Good Luck

Seeing a black butterfly means good luck will come your way. You might win a prize or the lottery, so keep an open mind if you see one in your home.

3 – A Black Butterfly Promotes Healthy Relationships

Black butterflies can guide you to new romances and friendships and deepen family relationships. They are guides to lead you to healthy relationships that enhance your well-being.

If you’ve recently had a dispute with a close friend or loved one, a black butterfly could be a sign to address it. It indicates that you should be compassionate and remember how meaningful the relationship is.

4 – Forgiveness

If you are holding a grudge, it implies that you should let it go and release your anger. When you release the negative feelings, it creates a shift that improves your relationship and benefits your life.

Forgiveness is life-changing, and you’ll be glad you left your grudges behind. Don’t hesitate to make amends, especially after seeing a black butterfly.

5 – The Black Butterfly Represents Mysterious Wisdom

The color black is associated with mystery and wisdom, and the black butterfly is the same. If you encounter one, it hints that you’ll be receiving insight into something beneficial. Be ready for the mysterious wisdom, and keep an open mind whenever you hear something. It could mean much more than you realize.

6 – Freedom and Following Your Path

Some urban legends explain that black butterflies were saved from death, indicating freedom. They represent a free spirit unconfined by anything. It implies that you should follow your path, regardless of what anyone else wants for you and your life.

Abandon herd mentality and the opinion of others for something aligned with your skills, values, and dreams. You don’t have to do what everyone else does, so stop listening to what society tells you. The black butterfly reminds you that you must redefine what success and happiness mean to you.

7 – A Black Butterfly Tells You to Dig Deeper

If you see a black butterfly, think about if there are any topics you need to look into. There might be a specific issue in your life that you must think about a little more. Take a step back to fully comprehend the steps you need to accomplish to resolve an issue.

Don’t give up if you feel you’ve reached a dead end and are all out of options. Dig deeper and see if there’s anything you missed or anything left to discover. Let go of limiting beliefs and develop a growth mindset to avoid missing out on opportunities.

Seeing a black butterfly is a reminder, so don’t ignore it. If you do, you will surely miss something because it tells you you must seek additional information. Use whatever you have right now to dig deeper, researching to fill in the things you don’t know yet.

8 – The Black Butterfly Encourages You to Cope with Aging

You can’t control getting older, which often causes anxiety and other issues. Don’t ignore the signs if a black butterfly comes to you in your dreams, subconscious, or real life. Instead, view it as a symbol of the beauty of aging.

Spend time reflecting on the passage of time because seeing the butterfly is a sure sign that there is a vital lesson for you to learn. As you reflect on your situation, remember that aging comes with developing the heart, mind, body, and soul.

It signifies a life well-lived, full of knowledge and experience. This butterfly is also a reminder to live in the moment, cherish each moment, and find a passion for life, learning, and growth.

9 – Let Go of Anxiety and Worry if You See a Black Butterfly

A black butterfly could imply that you are experiencing too much stress. If you see one, take a moment to reflect and re-evaluate the stressful situations in your life.

See if there’s anything you can let go of, allowing you some time to breathe and take care of yourself. It can also be a sign that you should stop ruminating and focus on living your best life right now. Plus, you should stop worrying about an uncertain future and use your energy to learn and grow.

Besides a Black Butterfly, Here is the Symbolism of Other Species

Black butterflies aren’t the only symbolic butterfly species. All butterflies symbolize growth, transformation, rebirth, and change, but each species offers other insights, too. The symbolism of butterflies runs much deeper than you may realize.

Monarch

Monarch butterflies symbolize strength, spirituality, trust, endurance, staying true to values, and transformation. They travel from Canada to Mexico, making them a strong representation of evolution and spiritual connection. Monarchs encourage you to connect to your inner self, allowing you to reflect on who you are and what you want.

If you see a monarch, it could mean that you’re in a season of growth and transformation. Keep an open mind and discover your inner truth because your life is likely changing. It reminds you to be strong and persevere while embracing your journey.

Don’t fear a new stage in your life journey because it means you’re growing and becoming a better version of yourself. If the monarch lands on you, it implies that you’re heading down the right path, so find comfort in the experience.

Red Admiral

A Red Admiral butterfly signifies life-changing news, so something big could be heading your way. Important things will happen for you, and red butterflies are a good omen. The changes will be positive and offer prosperity, so look forward to a new job, relationship, or beginning.

If a red butterfly lands on you, it could mean you have the solution to a current problem. Your life-changing news will come from discovering the answer you’ve been searching for. You already have the solution in mind, so spend time reflecting and focusing on growth and spiritual alignment.

As you wait to figure out the change, be aware of how you speak, think, and behave. Life is changing, and you must actively improve your characteristics. Hone in on your listening skills and ability to act with grace while accepting things you can’t change.

Viceroy

The Viceroy butterfly is a sign that you’re manifesting things quickly. Your spiritual being is in tune with the universe, and you’ll soon start getting everything you’ve wanted and needed. If you don’t currently feel like things are going your way, it’s a sign that some changes are coming that’ll get you there.

The Viceroy butterfly serves as a reminder of all the good in the world around you. It encourages you to be grateful for what and who you have right now.

Swallowtail

Swallowtail butterflies represent grace, free nature, hope, endurance, change, and a good life. These butterflies are also symbols of innovation and encourage growth and reflection.

This butterfly helps you see yourself for you who you are right now. The Swallowtail encourages you to embrace your life and live in the moment, seeing life as a miracle of hope, love, and joy.

White Butterflies

If you see a white butterfly, it symbolizes spiritual change and transformation. It also signifies purity and innocence. It is the universe’s way of telling you that there is a message for you and that you should keep an open mind.

If you encounter this butterfly, take some time to clear your mind and open your heart, allowing the universe to reach you.

Final Thoughts on the Symbolism of a Black Butterfly

If you encounter a butterfly, don’t ignore the symbolism it could offer. A black butterfly can help pave the way for your next steps in life. It can also signify what you should focus on or do to improve your mind.

Black butterflies aren’t the only species that offer signs and symbolism. The symbolism of butterflies is relevant for all species, although they may mean different things. Use this information to help you recognize the signs that come your way.

15 Ways to Stop Procrastination

June 23, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

Procrastination happens to all of us, but it can interfere with our success. Constantly putting things off doesn’t help your journey but can make the whole experience more stressful. Learning ways to stop procrastinating is essential if you want to get anything done promptly.

If you can stop procrastination, you’ll notice increased productivity. You’ll also experience less stress than before. It improves your mental health and makes your life better overall.

These ways to stop procrastination can make a difference in your life. You can overcome the urge to slack off while getting more done. You’ll have more time for fun when you get things done ahead of time.

The Difference Between Procrastination and Laziness

Many people think procrastination and laziness are the same, but that isn’t true. When you procrastinate, you work long and hard before your deadline. Being lazy would mean that you wouldn’t get it done at all.

Since being a procrastinator doesn’t indicate laziness, you can find ways to overcome it. Once you find the methods that work for you, you’ll have less stress getting your work done.

How to Stop Procrastination

Procrastination is a bad habit that stands in the way of your success. It can cause unnecessary stress and failing something you could have done well on. Learning to stop avoiding essential tasks can immensely improve your life and well-being.

1. Acknowledge the Procrastination

The first step to stopping procrastinating is recognizing that you are doing it. If you put things off indefinitely or avoid doing something, it’s time to admit the problem.

Some other signs that you might be procrastinating include:

Filling your day with low-priority tasks
Leaving things on your to-do list for an extended time
Putting off dealing with emails
Avoiding making decisions
Starting essential duties and then immediately taking a break
Waiting for the right time

2. Figure Out Why

Once you acknowledge that you’re putting things off, it’s time to figure out why. Determine the reason before tackling the problem so that you know what to work on. If you avoid something because it’s boring, make it a point to do it first and get to the enjoyable tasks. You might procrastinate because you’re unorganized, so that’ll be the issue that you address.

Another reason people avoid doing things is that they fear failure. If things don’t go well, they default to the excuse that they didn’t have time to do a better job. Procrastination can even stem from underlying health issues or stress. If you think that’s why you should seek help from a professional.

There are many reasons for putting things off, and it’s up to you to figure out your motivation. You can’t stop doing it if you don’t know the root of the problem.

3. Work on Developing New Habits to Replace Procrastination

Since procrastinating is a habit, you must develop new ingrained behavior patterns. You can’t break habits overnight, and being patient with yourself is best. Find positive actions to replace your old habits, and it’ll become easier soon enough.

4. Find an Accountability Partner

Sometimes it’s easier to stop putting things off with an accountability partner. Ask a friend to check-in or join a self-help group that can encourage you.

5. Minimize Distractions

Distractions make you put off your essential tasks, so minimize them. Think about your biggest distractions and plan to avoid them.

If email is a problem, log out during your most important tasks. When social media keeps you from getting things done, turn off your notifications for a while. You must control whatever distracts you if you want to stop procrastinating.

6. Forgive Yourself

You might guilt-trip yourself for procrastinating in the past, which can interfere with your life today. If you haven’t forgiven yourself, it can lead to further procrastination.

Research shows that forgiving yourself can make you feel good about your life. It also reduces the chance that you’ll continue to put things off now and in the future.

7. Instead of Procrastination, Do Things as They Come Up

One of the best ways to stop procrastinating is to do things as soon as they arise. Take care of a task as soon as it arises. This habit prevents stuff from building up and making you feel overwhelmed. Plus, it stops you from putting things off, and you’ll quickly realize how good it makes you feel.

8. Get the Unpleasant Tasks Done First

You know the tasks you dread each day, and you likely put them off for the end. However, you’re more likely to procrastinate when you only have dreadful things to look forward to at the end of the day. You don’t want to do that task, so you won’t be in a hurry to get to it.

Change this habit by doing the most unpleasant task first. Then, you have the most challenging part, giving you more to look forward to. You’ll feel relieved each time you accomplish the task early in the day.

Doing the most unpleasant task early in the day can be a form of active procrastination, delaying a job to focus on urgent things. Make the unpleasant tasks the urgent ones on your list, purposely putting off the more enjoyable things. Not only will you get it over with, but you’ll also feel motivated to get things done.

9. Reference a To-Do List

If you put things off because you’re unorganized, it’s time to make a change. Keeping a to-do list can help you prioritize and focus on what needs done. It’ll stop you from forgetting about or ignoring the task.

When you make a to-do list, place the most important tasks at the top of your list. Prioritize everything, and don’t start on the lower tasks until you’ve finished the other ones.

10. Commit to What You are Working On

Whatever task you’re working on, commit to it and focus on getting it done. Specify a time for accomplishing the essential activities, helping you work proactively.

If you can’t seem to get started, commit to a small task. Whatever task you choose, please write it down and get started. Once you finish, you’ll feel motivated to move on to the next item on your list.

Committing to the task and seeing it through gives you confidence and reminds you that you can get things done. Force yourself to finish the job no matter what happens. You’ll begin to trust yourself more, breaking your habit of putting things off.

11. Think About Your Procrastination and Set Long-Term Goals

When nothing else seems to work, think long-term. You’re less likely to put things off when considering the long-term benefits of getting it done. Think about the consequences of not accomplishing the task, too.

Having your long-term goals in mind will keep you motivated. It promotes positivity, productivity, and happiness. Remember that the most important thing is learning and achieving, not simply rushing to get things done.

12. Schedule and Plan

When you plan your time effectively, you can get more done and reduce stress. Schedule specific dates to complete tasks, and continually track your goal. It’ll motivate you to reach those milestones, helping build confidence and accomplish things.

Each night, spend time planning for the next day. By planning, you avoid figuring it out at the start of your workday. Schedule everything you need to accomplish so you know what you must do.

You can choose one big thing that you must do, and then make sure to include your daily habits. If you exercise every day, add it to your plan. Then, plan whatever else you’d like to accomplish.

Planning in this order ensures getting the most important things done first. You also give yourself time for daily habits, ensuring you don’t forgo your to-do list to exercise or read a book. You always know what you must do when you schedule and plan everything.

13. Reward Yourself

Reward yourself when you accomplish a difficult task or one you dislike. Make the reward something you love, like a piece of chocolate or a latte. It doesn’t have to be big, but it does have to motivate you.

14. Rephrase Your Thoughts

Negative self-talk won’t help you get things done. Instead, it’ll hold you back and cause you to put things off. Switch your thought from negativity to positivity, and you’ll notice a difference. It might help if you use positive affirmations each morning.

Stop using phrases that begin with “need to.” These phrases cause a lack of motivation because it makes you feel like you have no control over your situation. Instead, say “I want to” or “I choose to.”

15. Break Your Tasks Down to Avoid Procrastination

When you think of a large project, it might feel overwhelming. If that’s the case, you’re more likely to put it off. Instead of focusing only on the desired result, you must focus on what you can do now.

Break your goal down into manageable tasks, and put them on your to-do list as smaller milestones. Make the first task or two easy ones, gaining momentum by crossing things off your list. Accomplishing these small milestones will make you feel better about tackling the larger ones.

Final Thoughts on How to Stop Procrastination

Procrastination can hinder your progress in life, interfering with your goals and happiness. Delaying essential tasks might be easy at the moment, but it causes problems later on. Overcoming procrastination is necessary for your success and well-being.

Procrastinators may act like they’re okay with the lifestyle, but you know it’s stressful. These tips can help you stop putting things off. When you stop, you will surely notice an improvement in all areas of your life.

14 Things That Prove You’re on The Right Path in Life

June 23, 2022 by Chris Butler

Have you ever felt a bit lost in your world? If you’ve ever asked yourself why you were here and what’s your purpose, you’re in good company. Pursuing the right path in life has been a human endeavor since the beginning.

You’ll be disappointed if you wait for a personal message on a giant billboard to direct your paths. You may receive general guidance from spiritual leaders, but they don’t get the final say as you control your destiny.

Most people grow up with a list of accomplishments that pinpoint their success. You finally live the good life when you do this or have that. However, it’s not usually so obvious.

Will you have a unique feeling, or will it come to you in a dream? Must you be a certain age or earn a specific salary? Maybe the realization will hit you on top of the head like Newton’s mythical apple.

Fourteen Ways to Tell You’re on the Right Path

The irony of discovering your destiny is that you’ll only find it when you stop searching. That doesn’t mean you stop trying to improve yourself or curb your curiosity about life’s mysteries. The Universe and your inner voice will enlighten your steps.

All you need to do is listen to your heart and look for the signs. Some of them are more obvious than others. Fourteen signs prove you’re traveling the life path meant for you.

1. Experiencing Profound Life Changes

As you travel the right path, you’ll often experience monumental changes. Be they positive or negative, they will become your life’s touchstones. The positive ones may include your firsts, like your car, job, diploma, apartment, etc.

These are the changes that you build on for your life’s goals. Other positive changes include relationships and having children. These are beautiful moments that leave indelible signatures on your heart.

On the other hand, you’ll also encounter negative changes like loss and grief. You learn to turn the pain into a tool that helps you. While nobody likes change, it defines learning, maturing, and progressing.

2. Craving More Solitude Can Reveal You Are on the Right Path

You often crave more time alone when you’re on the right path. It doesn’t mean that you dislike people. It’s just that you need solitude to recharge. According to an article from the Journal of The Theory of Social Behavior, isolation has many benefits.

Spending quality alone time may boost your creativity and self-awareness. Unlike loneliness, solitude is usually a positive experience.

3. Distancing Yourself from Materialism

Everyone likes to have nice things. It’s not a moral deficit to want a lovely home, sharp vehicle, and a lucrative career. However, the more confident you are on the right path, the less material-minded you are.

The good news is that you needn’t renounce the world and become a hermit. You’re discovering actual values, such as health, love, and relationships with family and friends. No amount of money in the world could buy these intangible treasures.

4. Taking More Risks

As you mature, you learn to trust your intuition more. Consequently, you may be willing to take more risks. There’s a nugget of truth in the old saying that nothing ventured is nothing gained.

It takes self-confidence and faith to step into unfamiliar territory. Perhaps you’ve contemplated a career change or freedom from a toxic relationship. It could be the first step on the right road to your destiny.

5. You Are on the Right Path if You Find Your Niche

It’s not easy to find where you fit into this world. Be assured that the Universe has your best interests at heart and will gently guide you. If you follow your intuition, your life’s path will align with the purpose you feel in your spirit.

Some people instinctively know their niche even when they are children. That could be you, or maybe you’re destined to have more experiences and soul searching. Either way, your heart will “know” your role when you find it.

6. Noticing More Motivation

Have you always been a highly motivated person? You know how to set reasonable goals and achieve them. Then, you use these achievements to set your bar higher.

When you’re traveling the right path, you eventually realize no stopping point. You won’t announce that you’ve “arrived.” Instead, you are continually motivated to seek, knock, and ask.

7. Dreaming Vividly about Your Future

Dreams and goals are used interchangeably because people often have literal dreams about their future. Do you consider yourself a dreamer? Have you experienced vivid night visions about your life’s purpose?

You might consider keeping a dream journal on your nightstand. Write down details about these visions so you’ll remember them. You may be surprised how the Universe will use them as signposts that you’re on the right path.

8. Asserting Yourself More Often

There is a difference between aggression and assertion. While aggression threatens others’ rights, assertion protects your rights as an individual. You can make a stand for yourself firmly and politely without even needing to raise your voice.

You have every right to expect others to treat you with respect and dignity. As an individual, you have skills and talents that are valuable. You know that you’re worthy of love while walking your life path.

9. Learning from Failure Helps You on the Right Path

In his article published by the National Library of Medicine, Dr. Joseph Loscalzo takes a unique perspective on failure. Loscalzo urges people to embrace failure instead of avoiding it at all costs. Per the article, it can be a great teacher for self-improvement and self-esteem.

There are inevitable stumbles even when you’re on the right road. Instead of quitting, you get back up, dust yourself off, and move forward. As Dr. Loscalzo emphasizes, your only fundamental mistake is one that you make without learning anything from it.

10. Accepting Responsibility on the Right Path

Isn’t it astounding that you don’t have to teach young children to play the blame game? Even toddlers with limited vocabulary instinctively know how to point the finger at another kid. It may be cute for a toddler but ceases to be amusing when adults play this childish game.

Not only is shifting the blame a sign of immaturity, but it can also signify a toxic personality. As a mature person who knows where you’re going, you own your mistakes. Your ego isn’t too big to apologize for an offense and make proper amends.

11. Cultivating a Tighter Circle

Both extroverts and introverts have paths that are right for them. Some people are social butterflies with countless friends and acquaintances. Others are more reserved, with a few tight relationships with family and friends.

While making new friends is always great, your circle often gets tighter as you realize you’re on the right road. You value friendship, and you emphasize quality over quantity. As difficult as it can be, you learn to end relationships you’ve outgrown or are toxic.

12. Giving Back to Others

Although your destiny is a singular path, it’s not solitary. There have been many folks in your past who’ve been loving mentors. They reached out to you and shared their knowledge and resources. In honor of their sterling example, you learn to give to others who are finding their way.

Whether it’s being an after-school tutor or a volunteer in your local food pantry, you want to make a difference. This perpetual circle of giving and receiving is what makes future leaders and world influencers.

13. Allowing Yourself to Let Go More

Have you ever noticed how travel experts recommend that you pack lightly? When you pack only the necessities, the journey is so much lighter. You’re not paying a fortune for extra baggage and lugging them through the airport.

Likewise, traveling on the right path requires light packing. After a few miles, you start to discard heavy burdens like grudges and regrets. You trade them for necessities like love, joy, peace, forgiveness, and happiness.

14. Questioning Your Beliefs

Consider doing an honest internal inventory as you’re discarding some extra baggage. You may have blindly accepted these assumptions and beliefs in the past. Ask yourself which of these resonates with truth in your spirit or fall short.

Any of these that don’t pass this honesty test can be tossed. Why cling to hurtful beliefs that aren’t based on truth and reality? Instead, keep only those that agree with your heart that point to the right path.

Final Thoughts on Proving You’re on the Right Path

Even though the Universe is the sum of all power, you still have free will to design your life. When you learn to trust your intuition and Higher Power, they’ll guide you on the right road.

Fulfilling your destiny is the journey of a lifetime, so don’t be in a big hurry to get somewhere. Just take your time and enjoy each step embracing the freshness of each day and experience.

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