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6 Ways to Rid Yourself of Negative Energy

May 6, 2015 by Power of Positivity

Just like a computer stores files, your brain stores thoughts–containing both positive and negative energy. You don’t access these thoughts every day, but they are there and can be opened at any time.

Negative energy comes into your life through thoughts, words, actions, and reactions. When you take care of your body and your mind, you stand a better chance of resisting negative influences. Energy cleansing rituals have played a part in many spiritual practices since the beginning of man. Whether you practice external or internal rituals, finding what works for you is what matters.

Since we’ve talked about external tips to cleanse negative energy in a previous article (read it here), we’re going to tackle some internal strategies to clear negative energy.

Here are 7 ways to cleanse yourself of negative energy:

1 – Protect Your Mind

Negative energy begins in your mind, so it is up to you to learn how to protect it. You can protect your mind through listening:

Listen Critically: Studies show that what you often hear shapes what you believe, so it’s important to listen with a critical ear.
Listen Selectively: News, music, other people’s conversation all play a role in forming a thought. In fact, it is as influential as having a direct conversation with someone. When you stop inviting negativity in, you will become a little bit happier and a little less negative.
Listen Visually: Take a long hard look at what you see. Negative thoughts can also enter through images on TV, in magazines and on your computer. Hide negativity in your social media feeds, watch shows that are positive in nature and flip through magazines that are inspiring.

2 – Find Some Quiet

Whatever quiet looks like to you, find it and commit to just being and breathing. No phones, no computer, no TV, no conversation. Just let the absence of noise and negativity engulf you for a few minutes. And that’s all it takes – just a few minutes.

Be careful though, as you begin to find quiet, you will crave more of it. Just go with the flow and find some calm in a world of chaos.

3 – Broaden Your Perspective

Negative thoughts are heightened when you focus more on yourself and your challenges then you focus on others. When you are selfabsorbed, you limit your potential.

When you include a strong social network into your world, you continue to grow. It’s the new experiences that come with being active and social that broaden your perspective.

You can’t control what you hear from others, but you can choose how to process it. And the choice you make

is based on your perspective. The wider your perspective, the more opportunity you have for choosing positive reactions and creating positive energy.

4 – Be Open to the Moment

Everyone likes to be in control, and when challenges enter your day, you fight it and try to stop it but all it ends up doing is throwing you for a loop.

What if you welcomed chaos into your day? How would it feel if you just accepted the happenings of the moment, looked for the possibilities and took action based on what was before you?

That is creating positive energy and living in a happier state of mind. Let Go of the Need for Approval

The need for approval plays an important role in our thoughts. It kills our ability to think positively and prevents us from our journey. Instead, we think and act based on other people’s agenda.

The need for approval is negatively impacting your life – you procrastinate, avoid doing important things, feel anxiety and fear, and get stuck in worry – all in the quest to gain approval.

Create positive energy by acting freely without the worry of people’s opinions. You will have the freedom to pursue things that make you feel good and be able to meander on your life’s path, trying new things without the fear of failure.

5 – Look Within to Identify Negative Energy

Self confidence allows you to create accurate and positive opinions about your circumstances. When you are confident, you trust that you will be able to do what you set out to do. Trusting your path, means obstacles are just that and failure isn’t in your vocabulary. You take each challenge as the lesson needed to continue your journey. Self confidence lets the real you emerge.

Being self confident isn’t only the key to doing anything you want, it is the clear understanding of what you want and your preparedness for that quest.

As a result, you gain the self confidence to take the risk. You think for yourself, and you don’t have to be just like everyone else. When you are self confident, the negative energy that surrounds you tends to shrink, and the positivity shines through.

6 – Choose the Right Words to Release Negative Energy

As you become more aware of your thoughts, actions, and words, it gets easier to notice the negativity that is all around, even from you.

What you say and the words you choose are very important to maintaining a positive perspective and working towards positive outcomes. Taking the power of positive thought to the next level requires evaluating the words we use in our thoughts.

Even something that is intended to be positive in nature can be negative because of the words we choose. For example, how many times do you say, “don’t forget ….” Well, what word is the focus there? Forget.

Instead, try saying, “remember ….” Can you feel the shift? That is the power of word choice and mastering it can be very influential in cleansing yourself of negative energy.

How do you cleanse negative energy? What rituals do you observe to help you foster more positivity? Share in the discussion below…

51 Quotes to Help You Stop Over Thinking

May 6, 2015 by Power of Positivity

Past events only affect us when we continue thinking about them. It is overthinking that gives them power. By constantly replaying the events, worrying about them and trying to figure them out, we remove ourselves from living in the now and instead choose to relive the past. There is no good that comes from reliving something over and over again. Learn the lesson and move back into the present.

At the same time, pondering too much about the future also keeps you from the present moment. Sometimes, the most important lessons we can learn are that both the past, and the future, are not happening. In fact, they’re never truly happening. Enjoy the gift of the current moment, this is why it’s called the present…

Here are 51 quotes to help you to stop overthinking.

“The more you overthink the less you will understand.” – Habeeb Akande

“We are dying from overthinking. We are slowly killing ourselves by thinking about everything. Think, think, think. You can never trust the human mind anyway. It’s a death trap.” – Anthony Hopkins

“Your perspective on life comes from the cage you were held captive in.” – Shannon L. Alder

“I’m tired of being inside my head. I want to live out here, with you.” – Colleen McCarty

“Overthinking ruins moods and kills good vibes.” – SupaNova Slom

“Don’t overthink things. Sometimes you can convince your head not to listen to your heart. Those are the decisions you regret for the rest of your life.” Faith Barnett From Texas Tangle” – Leah Braemel

“Thinking will not overcome fear but action will.” – Clement Stone

“We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.” – Albert Einstein

“There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so.” – William Shakespeare

“Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is probably the reason why so few engage in it.” – Henry Ford

“The head thinks. The heart knows.” – Rasheed Ogunlaru

“If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done.” – Bruce Lee

“Half our mistakes in life arise from feeling where we ought to think, and thinking where we ought to feel.” – John Churton Collins

“The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” – Alice Walker

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t–you’re right.” – Henry Ford

“The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.” – Terry Pratchett

“The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” – Albert Einstein

“I think and think and think, I‘ve thought myself out of happiness one million times, but never once into it.” – Jonathan Safran Foer

“The mind is not a vessel to be filled, but a fire to be kindled.” – Plutarch

“Stop thinking, and end your problems.” – Lao Tzu

“Think for yourself and let others enjoy the privilege of doing so too.” – Voltaire

“If you believe that your thoughts originate inside your brain, do you also believe that television shows are made inside your television set?” – Warren Ellis

“The spirit of the individual is determined by his dominating thought habits.” – Bruce Lee

“Take time to deliberate, but when the time for action comes, stop thinking and go in.” – Napoléon Bonaparte

“Thinking is the hardest work there is, which is probably the reason so few engage in it.” – Henry Ford

“The essence of the independent mind lies not in what it thinks, but in how it thinks.” – Christopher Hitchens

“We are set in our ways, bound by our perspectives and stuck in our thinking.” – Joel Osteen

“Thinking is a bit uncomfortable, but you’ll get used to it. A matter of time and practice.” – Lloyd Alexander

“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation, but your thoughts about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking.” – Eckhart Tolle

“You’ve never lived what you are thinking, and that isn’t good. Only the ideas we actually live are of any value.” – Hermann Hesse

“Too often we… enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought.” – John F. Kennedy

“The trouble with most people is that they think with their hopes or fears or wishes rather than with their minds.” – Will Durant

“Nothing is more conducive to peace of mind than not having any opinion at all.” – G.C. Lichtenberg

“Thoughts are like an open ocean, they can either move you forward within its waves, or sink you under deep into its abyss.” – Anthony Liccione

“It’s crazy how you can get yourself in a mess sometimes and not even be able to think about it with any sense and yet not be able to think about anything else.” – Stanley Kubrick

“[Thinking is] what a great many people think they are doing when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.” – William James

“You cannot plough a field by turning it over in your mind.” – Author Unknown

“No way of thinking or doing, however ancient, can be trusted without proof.” – Henry David Thoreau

“It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.” – Aristotle

“Clear thinking requires courage rather than intelligence.” — Thomas Szasz

“It is well for people who think, to change their minds occasionally in order to keep them clean.” — Luther Burbank

“Thought is the blossom; language the bud; action the fruit behind it.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson

“A real decision is measured by the fact that you’ve taken a new action. If there’s no action, you haven’t truly decided.” — Tony Robbins

“Better to be without logic than without feeling.” – Charlotte Bronte

“Don’t think. Thinking is the enemy of creativity. It’s self-conscious, and anything self-conscious is lousy. You can’t try to do things. You simply must do things.” — Ray Bradbury

“Every great and deep difficulty bears in itself its own solution. It forces us to change our thinking in order to find it.” — Niels Bohr

“I began to realize that thinking itself is nothing but the process of asking and answering questions.” — Tony Robbins

“I once tried thinking for an entire day, but I found it less valuable than one moment of study.” — Xun Zi

“If you keep thinking about what you want to do or what you hope will happen, you don’t do it, and it won’t happen.” — Desiderius Erasmus

“I really wish I was less of a thinking man and more of a fool not afraid of rejection.” — Billy Joel

“What we think, we become.” — Buddha

10 Reasons People Give Up On Love

May 5, 2015 by Power of Positivity

Choosing not to fall in love is entirely different than falling out of love. When people fall out of love, they have grown in different ways while choosing not to fall in love means people purposefully keep love from happening.

Our hearts do not understand the difference between romantic love and friendship love. Love is love and by not allowing oneself to fall in love we are in essence refusing all love.

People may not even realize they are doing it, so we’ve compiled ten reasons people stop falling in love to help understand why it happens.

“I’m looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can’t live without each other love.” ~Carrie Bradshaw

10 Reasons People Give Up On Love:

1. Seeking instant gratification.

As part of a society that promotes and delivers instant access to anything and everything, there’s a problem created, simply because falling in love is anything but instant.

Falling in love isn’t about the “love at first sight” feelings people talk about, it is about building a relationship based on common values and mutual interests. And that takes time.

Unfortunately, instant gratification is an enemy of falling in love, and if we aren’t careful, it could prevent us from experiencing it.

2. Being emotionally unavailable

Some people think of feelings as the enemy and that having them is a sign of weakness. You hide from your feelings in an attempt to appear strong and confident. You create a false reality based on what you think other people want to see.

How can you fall in love when you are not open to the feelings that the process creates? Falling in love is all about feelings, very heightened and very wonderful feelings.

3. Commitment issues

There is nothing wrong with wanting the best for yourself unless it gets in the way of what is right for you. But If you are on a constant quest for something better, you will never know when the best has arrived.

You run the risk of letting the best get away unless you are willing to commit to what is now. Instead of consistently looking for something better, look at what’s best in life right now and focus on that. Only then will better things come to pass.

4. Too much focus on “self”

Being happy is all about doing more of what makes yourself feel good, so it makes sense that we think about what we need. It’s being overly focused on our own selves that’s the problem.

We have to function in society, and that means having relationships with other people, who are also thinking about their needs. It’s important to balance our needs with the needs of others.

5. You just want to have fun

How many times have you said to yourself, “I’m just having fun right now?” You want to go to clubs, date around and party it up. That attitude makes the assumption that falling in love or being in a committed relationship isn’t fun. You are just playing mind games with yourself.

You go out and put yourself out there in the hopes of finding someone to fall in love with, but the reality is you are sending the opposite signals. You are giving up the opportunity to find the right person while in the wrong places.

6. A lack of compromise.

You have an idea of what your perfect partner looks like, but you can’t seem to find them. The problem is that your idea of the perfect partner may not exactly exist.

Start out with a list to use as a guide, but be willing to compromise. It can be painstakingly difficult to find someone who meets every quality, so spend time with people who match the most important characteristics and be open to compromise on the rest.

7. Fairy-Tale Chasing

It’s a fairy tale for a reason. Life doesn’t always follow a script, so why would you expect falling in love to follow one? No one can live up to such high expectations.

Falling in love is something that happens by forging a path, on its terms. Do yourself a favor and allow it just to happen.

8. Perfectionism

Being perfect in a relationship, and especially while falling in love is not a time to try to be perfect. People make mistakes and even fail from time to time.

If an expectation of perfection is present, mistakes and failures will prevent you from moving forward in your relationship. If you aren’t expecting perfection and always strive for excellence instead, you can dust yourself off and continue falling in love.

9. You are focused on your goals.

Many people want to become financially independent, debt-free, find a partner, and buy a house by age 30. While these are fairly lofty goals, it doesn’t sound like time for falling in love has a place on that list.

Dreams, goals, and aspirations are an important part of your individual growth but putting off love until you get your life together can be a big mistake. It will prevent you from opening your heart to love.

By not keeping your heart open, you risk the chance that it may not be available in the future. Be open to falling in love and trust that it will happen when it’s right for you. Don’t give up.

10. Love is confusing.

Love is not something you can expect to perform a certain way. It changes, evolves and grows in the most unexpected ways. This is a complex emotion, and you need to accept it as it comes. That can be scary, but it is also wonderful and euphoric when you allow it the freedom to do its thing. Stop trying to figure it out and just be happy you are on the journey.

Are you guilty of any of these? If the answer is yes, consider choosing some of the solutions and see what happens. Chances are you will regret waiting so long to make the choice.

15 Things You Should Make Time For Again

May 5, 2015 by Power of Positivity

Each day, most of us scramble around in the morning before work, mindlessly grabbing toaster tarts and a thermos full of coffee, and kissing our family goodbye. We make time for things that make us more efficient, productive human beings, but do we make the time for the things that really matter in life?

Let the words you’re about to read really sink in because we could all use a refresher on the irreplaceable parts of life we often don’t make much time for anymore.

Here are 15 Things to Make Time For Again

1 – Talking to people face-to-face.

In today’s world, most of our communication happens through our cell phones, where we can conveniently type out a sentence or two and send it to our friends and loved ones. But, digital communication will never substitute for in-person interaction; you can’t hug someone through a phone, or see them smile, or read their body language. Make sure you actually set aside time to see people you love in person and learn to use your phone only in times of emergency or just some quick catching up on social media.

2 – Yourself.

This one seems pretty obvious, but how many of us really can say we set aside time to take care of ourselves? Or that we prioritize our health and well-being above all else? As the population continues to get sicker, it’s pretty apparent that many of us don’t make time for the most important thing: our health. Take the extra time to prepare healthier foods, take naps, exercise, spend time in the sun, meditate, and relax. You matter, so treat yourself as such.

3 – Vacations.

According to a 2013 Vacation Deprivation study done by Expedia, the average American was given 14 days of vacation, but only used 10. Altogether, that’s roughly 577,212,000 collective days of unused vacation! If you haven’t been on a family trip in a while and money seems to be the reason, you can always book a cheaper hotel, cook meals at home for a while to save money, or cut spending in some other way. You’ll want to look back on your life and think of all the memories you made, not all the hours you clocked in at work.

4 – Acting like a kid.

Before your life was consumed with work and responsibilities, what did you enjoy doing? Probably rolling around in the grass, playing hide-and-seek, racing go-karts, or jumping around in puddles after a rainstorm. Whether you’re 23 or 85 now, do more kid things. They will make you feel half your age, and remind you that life isn’t as serious as we make it out to be.

5 – Disconnecting from the hustle and bustle, and reconnecting to nature.

City life can wear on a person’s nerves after a while, so make sure you take plenty of time to get out of the city and tune back into nature. Ever heard of noise and light pollution? Yeah, those affect us each and every day, unless you live in a cave or something. Before the invention of modern society, we would spend our days mostly outdoors, gathering food and playing in the sun. To be frank, the way we do things now isn’t remotely healthy for anybody, so take ample time to heal and channel your spirit guides for assistance along your journey. This helps greatly as we try to navigate the earthly 3D realms.

6 – Quality time with relatives.

Remember the days when you played board games and told ghost stories with your cousins? Do it all over again, even if you feel silly at first. We spend far too much time communicating through posts on Facebook, and not enough time bonding in person with one another.

7 – Reading books.

Not books on Kindles or iPads or Nooks, but REAL books that have those pages you can turn and creases to put bookmarks in. Digital books don’t have that distinctive “book” smell either, and you can’t listen to the crinkle of the pages as you turn them. Books you can actually hold in your hand just offer an entirely different experience (a better one, I think).

8 – Cooking for our families.

How many nights do we get take-out instead of cooking what we have at home? Probably far too many. Surprise your family by cooking a nice, fresh, homemade meal for them, or have them help you in the kitchen. It just feels better to eat food you made yourself, plus your family will really appreciate what you did for them.

9 – Watching home videos.

This makes for a great family bonding activity, plus it takes you back to the good ol’ days and helps you reconnect to your childhood self.

10 – Looking through old photo albums.

We often look through photos on our cell phones, but do we ever open up physical photo albums anymore? Sit down with your parents and siblings and look at all the old pictures you have lying around the house – as they’ve collected dust, you’ve probably long forgotten some of the best memories you had growing up.

11 – Being happy just because.

We’re always looking for a reason to be happy, but what about feeling happy for the heck of it? You don’t always something to attach your happiness to; if you’re alive, that’s reason enough. 🙂

12 – Doing nothing.

Everyone’s always striving, moving, exerting, rushing, explaining, complaining, and the list goes on. It feels amazing to just sit down and be, without having to worry about normal human activities for a while.

13 – Journaling.

It’s not healthy to keep all your thoughts locked up in a cage (your mind). Free them by letting them all out on paper; you probably journaled often as a teenager, so why not now? As an adult, you have MORE reason to need an outlet for your emotions since your life is likely much more complicated and fast-paced.

14 – Taking pictures with a cheap disposable camera, and actually developing them.

How many pictures do you have in your iPhone that you haven’t developed? Go out and buy a 90s camera if you can find it, take pictures with your family, and get them developed. Now, you actually have a physical copy of your memories, rather than just a digital version that you can’t put in a scrapbook.

15 – Connecting with each other.

Have family dinners instead of eating in separate rooms. Have conversations about life instead of sitting idly on social media. Nothing will ever take the place of face-to-face human connection, so don’t take your friends and family for granted. It might be the digital age, but we should all work to reinforce a new age: the age of reconnection.

10 Ways to Change Your Life in 10 Minutes or Less

May 4, 2015 by Power of Positivity

There seems to be a greater focus on being happy in today’s world. While happiness is a worthwhile goal, many people tackle happiness like they tackle buying a house. They start focusing on the final destination instead of focusing on what they can do today to achieve the ultimate goal. Here are ways to begin to change your life today.

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” – Lao Tzu

One might argue that you will never achieve the ultimate happiest life because there is always room to be even happier. What makes you happier will continue to change as you evolve, so focusing on the end goal is a short-sided approach. Want to be happier? Start now.

Here are 10 ways to change your life in 10 minutes or less – beginning today.

1 – Learn Something New

The need to learn something doesn’t stop when we stop going to school. Learning for the sake of learning is what makes us human and what allows us to continue to grow and evolve into our best selves.

A world of interesting information and knowledge awaits and it has never been easier to learn something new. You can start to enhance your life by watching a Ted talk, listening to a podcast or subscribe to feeds like Did You Know? and Tell Me Why?. Whatever it is, learn something new today.

Learning makes us confident, feeds our creative soul and broadens our perspective. It doesn’t have to be a formal process; you can start by devoting just ten minutes a day to learning something new.

2 – Breathe

Deep and purposeful breathing is our best tool against anxiety, frustration, and overall negative feelings. When you start to feel the tension in your neck or butterflies in your stomach, take a minute and breathe deeply.

Close your eyes and focus on your breath. Breathe in deeply through your nose and visualize your entire body filling up with your breath. Then slowly exhale through your mouth and watch the breath leave.

Do this five times and feel the incredibly relaxing effects it has on your body and mind.

3 – Hug

Virginia Satir, a family therapist, contends, “We need four hugs a day for survival. We need eight hugs a day for maintenance. We need twelve hugs a day for growth.”

This relatively simple practice can help reduce stress, improve our mood and make us feel good about ourselves. Believe it or not, research shows that hugs can be effective in healing sickness too. Now, go out and hug someone or twelve someones today. Indeed, it will certainly change your life.

4 – 10 Minutes of Yoga

The benefits of yoga are pretty well-known including stress release, an increase in fitness, improved immunity, and inner peace. Even so, plenty of people are reluctant to start practicing it because they think they can’t do the poses they see on Facebook.

Well, what better way to start a yoga practice than in your home with a simple 5-minute yoga sequence. This will help you start each day with added flexibility and calm and watch how your perspective will change.

5 – Visualize

Spend a few minutes visualizing your perfect day and watch what happens. Visualize making good choices, doing great work, laughing with good friends and having a good day and a better day will magically happen.

When we bring our intention to doing things that make us feel good, we respond by making it a reality through our actions. Visualize and expect the day to be a great day, exactly the way you want to be and enjoy it as it happens.

6 – Eat for a positive mood.

The foods we eat affect our mood and if you want to change your life, then choose foods that affect your mood for the positive. Foods affect people in different ways so when you eat something, listen to your body and see how you feel.

If you feel good, keep eating it and if you don’t then stop. This doesn’t mean you have to give up the foods you love because they don’t agree with you, but understanding how they affect you will help you make better food choices.

7 – Go Outside

Nothing feeds the soul like some fresh air, and a good boost of vitamin D. Make it a point to go outside when you are feeling “blah” or need a quick break. Doing so will increase your mood, make you more productive and bring out your creative mind.

8 – Declutter

Clutter can rob you of the vital energy you need to live your best life. Spending just a few minutes decluttering the spaces you live and work in can have a huge impact on enhancing your life.

Make a conscious choice to declutter. This will free you up to appreciate what you have and focus your attention on the things that matter most. Start small with a shelf or a drawer. You will be surprised how far you can get with just ten minutes of decluttering.

9 – Compliment Others

Complimenting others helps you as much as them. It can build trust, spark creativity and make you and the other person feel good. The best benefit of all? It takes the focus off of you.

The next time you are feeling down or stuck, start complimenting others and watch your self-esteem increase.

10 – Ten Minutes of Gratitude

Focusing on the things that we are grateful for every day brings the good in our life into focus. What better way to change your life for the better than to remind ourselves daily why our life is already so awesome?

Spend a few minutes every day reflecting on all the things that make you happy and make you feel good. There is no better way to live a great life than to realize how great life really is.

Now it’s your turn. What activities do you do that help change your life for the better?

7 Things That Keep You From Living In the Now

May 3, 2015 by Power of Positivity

Mindfulness, or living in the now, is making the choice to focus on our present and live in our experiences. It sounds like something that should be easy, but it takes effort and practice. If you are struggling to live in the now, it might be because of one of these seven things.

“Mindfulness means paying attention in a particular way; On purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally.” ~Jon Kabat-Zinn

7 Things That Keep You From Living In the Now

1 – You Are Trying to Hard to Fit Into The Mindfulness Box

Being mindful of the present looks different for everyone. There is a perception around how to practice mindfulness that would have you enjoy a clear mind except for what is happening right now. That is not a reality for most people because life is happening all around us. It is hard to live in the now when you are trying so hard to be like someone else, instead of yourself.

The Fix

How you choose to practice mindfulness is just right for you. Like everything we do, living in the now takes practice and the more you do it, the better you will become. One of the key ingredients of living in the now is to not beat yourself up. Do what you can, learn your lessons, try again.

2 – Too Much Focus On The Goal

Having goals means that focus is placed on the future, which is the exact opposite of living in the now. Goals are important for moving forward and continuing your growth. The problem happens when you are so focused on your future goals that you forget the steps it will take to get there.

The Fix

Stop making the goal the focus and shift your attention on what you can today, right now, in support of that goal. Other than visualizing and feeling the result, the big goal should be about the little steps you need to take along the way. Set the goal and intention, release and live now.

3 – Over-planning

Planning by nature is fine, but too much is the opposite of living in the now. When every little detail is scheduled in advance, the freedom of enjoying experiences as they happen is being restricted. Of course, there are things that must get done – just realize your day will be better when things just happen.

The Fix

Keep a few hours of every day free from scheduled events. Give yourself the time for a walk, coffee with a friend or spending time with your journal. It is easier to live in the now when you stop focusing on what you have to do later in the day.

4 – Reliving Failures

Holding on to your failures keeps you living in the past and prevents you from living in the now. You know in your head that you can’t change the past, so allow yourself to make the best decisions right now with the information you have on hand.

Holding onto your failures will have you choosing scared. It will prevent you from making the right choices because you don’t want to repeat the mistake.

The Fix

Learn from your mistakes and take the lesson with you, not the failure. It can be hard to do sometimes but when you are thinking about the failure, make sure and always associate the lesson with it. End your thought on the lesson not on the actual event.

5 – Seeking Immediate Satisfaction

We live in a 24/7 world and sometimes that knowledge works against us. When we expect immediate results, we are waiting for the result and not focusing on what is happening now.

The now includes the waiting and the process, and those are an important part of feeling satisfied and content. When we expect immediate satisfaction, it is hard to fully appreciate the experience.

The Fix

Be okay with allowing things to happen in their own time. Know with each passing moment your satisfaction will be greater and last longer because of the process it took to get there. Slow down, look around and enjoy what is happening while you wait.

6 – You’re Easily Distracted

It’s hard not to be distracted in this crazy, chaotic world. Cell phones are ringing, texts are flying and you have a million things on your to-do list.

Distractions can take you away from the moment and shift your attention to something else. Trying to avoid distractions is also a distraction and can hurt more than it can help.

The Fix

Know distractions will happen and when they do acknowledge it, make a note of it, and then go back to the task at hand. Bringing your attention back to the now is an important skill, and you can only do that when you acknowledge what is happening around you and choose to come back.

7 – People Pleasing

Let’s face it – we, as a society, are people pleasers. Unfortunately, when you spend time trying to please others you are not living your life, you are living theirs.

It is hard to remain in the now when you are focused on making other people happy. Instead of living in and enjoying your experiences, you are spending your energy trying to figure out your next step.

The Fix

Ask yourself what you want and how you feel? Make sure you are living your truth and not trying to live up to someone else’s expectations.

By living your life, you can let go of the planning and just enjoy moments knowing you are on your journey and ultimately the right path.

Practicing mindful thought and living in the now can be frustrating at first. Remember that it looks different for everyone and your mindfulness practice should feel right not contentious. Give yourself the time to practice and enjoy the process. It does get easier over time.

5 Ways to Forgive and Let Go

May 3, 2015 by Power of Positivity

“Forgive others. Not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace.”

When we come into this world, we have no concept of pain, deceit, or betrayal. We retain these feelings as we navigate life, though, and they build up over time if we fail to go within and clear our energy bodies of these toxic thoughts. Holding grudges can literally make us feel ill; it causes dis-ease of the mind, which can then breed physical diseases as well.

At first, it won’t come easily to forgive those who hurt you in the past, but it’s necessary in order to evolve and shed yourself of your “pain-body” as Eckhart Tolle calls it in his book “The Power of Now.” These tips will help you get started on the path of healing your emotional pain and allow the light to shine on your soul once again.

5 Ways to Forgive and Let Go

1. Don’t try, just be.

While setting and achieving goals is a part of life, don’t allow the process of reaching new heights to keep you from staying grounded in the present moment. You have to accept where you’re at in your journey right now before you can begin to work towards forgiveness. Even then, don’t stress out about the distance between your state of consciousness and forgiving others – just take one step at a time, staying present during every phase of the process.

When you give up the need to try, you allow your natural state to come through effortlessly. Believe in yourself and remember you have incredible potential as a spiritual being at this very moment. Just as you shouldn’t hold onto past pain, you also shouldn’t cause more pain for yourself by criticizing your progress. Breathe, and remember you have so much more value than you give yourself credit for.

2. Don’t identify with any thoughts – just silently observe them.

We cause unnecessary pain by quickly attaching to our thoughts instead of mindfully watching them. Our egos (minds) always want to fight for control, so the key here is to back down. Don’t strive to eliminate or change your thoughts; become aware of them. Once you develop awareness regarding your mind, you will realize the Ego wants to play tricks on you.

The true self lies within your heart and soul – by tuning in more to your feelings rather than thoughts, you will start to vibrate on a higher frequency, and destructive thoughts about your past will enter your mind less often.

The National Science Foundation estimated a number of years ago that people have an average of 70,000 to 80,000 thoughts per day, with 80% of those being negative, and 95% being repeated. That means that we aren’t really thinking – we’re remembering. To get our brains rewired for more helpful thoughts, we have to refrain from labeling those thoughts as ‘good’ or ‘bad.’ They’re simply thoughts, and you don’t actually own them – they come and go as they please from the collective consciousness. You may not control what enters your brain, but you can control how you react to it.

3. Send out love to those who hurt you.

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

Wishing harm to others will only destroy you in the end. Think about it. When you send negative vibes into the universe, you lower your vibration, inviting bad karma in. You attract what you are. Therefore, you only perpetuate the pain you feel in your own life by seeking revenge. You won’t feel free until you surrender to love, so you have to love those who caused you suffering, as hard as it might seem.

You don’t have to do this overnight. But taking small steps to increase the love in your heart will result in a positive outcome every time. Relinquish your addiction to feeling pain, and there you will find ultimate liberation and fulfillment.

4. Focus on becoming the best version of yourself.

“Hurt people, hurt people; healed people, heal people.”

As simple as this concept seems, many of us forget it in the haste of our daily lives. So much suffering continues on the planet because those who have been hurt keep the pain alive, passing it on to someone else. To avoid spreading this dis-ease of the mind and soul, accept that you can control your own emotions, and others have no ability to affect you negatively unless you allow them to. Focus all your energy not on tearing others down, but on building yourself up.

The work is ultimately the same, but you will feel more accomplished by improving yourself than destroying others. Plus, you will have found peace within, and that feels much better than harboring toxic thoughts.

5. Forgive because expecting perfection is unrealistic.

We live in a world where people make mistakes, and they make them often. While some have worse consequences than others, many happen accidentally, not on purpose. We all are just trying to survive, and most don’t intentionally wish bad things upon others. Please realize that we all swim in the same sea and battle the same currents. All of us try to keep our heads above the water, but sometimes we sink throughout this test of life. Does that mean we should be punished because we slipped up for once? Allow people to make mistakes and grow, and try to remember that you once probably made the same mistake.

Final Thoughts: Let Go, Forgive, and Continue to Evolve

You can forgive others much easier when you remember that they, like you, are human and vulnerable to the same mishaps and road bumps. If you are ready to forgive and let go, repeat the following affirmation:

I forgive and release. I am enabling my walk toward a brighter future! Shine on!

7 Ways to Show Gratitude When You Need It Most

May 3, 2015 by Power of Positivity

It’s easy to be grateful when life is going according to plan. Life, however, rarely goes according to plan. There are times when being grateful is hard, and it is in these times that your gratitude practice will serve you most.

Being grateful isn’t something to achieve, it’s part of who we are and it comes from being. There may never be a day when you will feel you are the most grateful person you can be, and your work is complete. Occasionally there will be a dark day where finding even a sliver of gratitude will be challenging.

Here are 7 ways to show gratitude when you need it most.

1 – Remember That You’re A Work In Progress

As mentioned above, you may not be in a place when everything is exactly the way you want, and there isn’t anything more that you desire. Life is a work in progress, and if you keep that perspective, you will know this dark day is just one day.

Trust your instincts, let your intuition guide you knowing you will make mistakes and that mistakes are a part of making progress. Focus less on the end game and more on getting there. Do something small today to make tomorrow a bit brighter.

2 – Reframe The Complaint

According to Psychology Today, the average person complains 15-30 times per day. That is some serious complaining. In fact, complaining is the number one enemy of gratitude because it’s common, it happens daily, it’s easy to do, and it happens without us even realizing it.

When you hear yourself complaining, make it a requirement to force yourself to accept or change the situation. You can do that by adding an “and” to the end of your complaint.

Here’s an example: I don’t like my job. My boss always yells at me. He makes me feel like a failure … and … I have scheduled a meeting to discuss how I feel.

By adding the “and”, you aren’t resting on the complaint but instead changing the focus to a positive solution or alternative.

3 – Keep Gratitude Visible

Gratitude only works if you keep it visible. Sharing your intentions, expressing gratitude in conversations, and truly integrating gratitude into your daily life is necessary if you intend on becoming a grateful person.

When we keep gratitude visible, it infiltrates our lives through other sources like family, friends and even acquaintances. During tough times, all these sources will become your support to help remind you of the things you are grateful for.

4 – Seek Gratitude

Situations often seem worse than they are when we are in the middle of it all. When things are tough, sometimes you have to go out looking for things that make you grateful.

Think back on some of the mistakes you made and searched for the lesson. What did learning that lesson teach you? Maybe you avoided a similar mistake with a bigger impact or maybe you made a different decision that led to a success.

Either way, that mistake and the lesson you learned are something to recognize. Another place to hunt for moments of gratitude might be in things that didn’t happen.

You never know what you avoided by being late, missing the train or failing to get a job. Understand that there may be something to be grateful for in the things that go wrong.

5 – Make Gratitude Intentional

It’s easy to go through the motions of practicing gratitude but not so easy to intentionally focus on becoming more grateful. Contradictory feelings cannot reside in the same space. If you are feeling grateful, it is impossible to feel envious or resentful.

Create intention around your gratitude practice. Ask yourself, “Why do I want to be grateful?” Then ask, “What will my life look like if I choose not to be grateful?” Hopefully, you will begin to understand why a practice of gratitude is important for you and create a clear intention and vision around your practice.

6 – Remember the Little Things

There will be days when you take a moment to express what you are grateful for, and it just doesn’t come out – no matter how hard you try.

Surely you can’t just put it off, especially when you need it most. So what do you do?

You refer to the little things that matter most, whether they’re already stored in your head, or on paper – these things may be exactly what you need to get through. They might not be the big moments that made you thankful, but they are the subtle gifts that are ever-present in your life. They are things like a family, food on the table, a roof over your head and so on.

It’s the little things that can help you remember the bigger things you’re grateful for. For this reason alone, it is an essential element in your gratitude practice.

7 – When All Else Fails – Look Up

So much of our day is spent moving from point A to point B with our head down. When all else fails, try looking up.

You will find gratitude when strangers smile back at you, you will find curiosity in the beautiful architecture and will marvel at the stunning landscape and foliage that surround you every day.

When you look up, you open your eyes to the world before you and the possibility around you.

Going beyond practicing gratitude and becoming a grateful person is the key to keeping gratitude present when you need it most. Wake up every day with the intention of being grateful and grateful you will be.

Join the discussion: How have you found gratitude when you needed it most?

10 Things to Stop Expecting From Others

May 2, 2015 by Power of Positivity

We put ourselves through unnecessary suffering when we have unreasonable expectations for others or constantly put them under a microscope. Of course, we all deserve basic things in relationships, like respect, but counting on anything other than that may leave you sorely disappointed.

Remember that everyone is at a different place on their journey, so their words and actions will reflect that. If you want to have more successful, happier relationships with people, it’s important that you…

Stop Expecting These 10 Things From Others:

1. Stop expecting them to always do the “right thing” based on your standards.

People’s morals and ethics differ based on a lot of factors, like their upbringing, culture, spiritual beliefs, etc. Let’s say you never swear, but your friend curses like a sailor.

Does that make him or her wrong? Well, to some it does, but expecting them to do right in your eyes will always end in frustration because right and wrong aren’t clearly defined.

Just focus on adhering to your own morals, and let others live as they choose, as long as it doesn’t hurt you or the people you care about.

2. Stop expecting them to be perfect.

If you view imperfections as perfect, then you won’t ever feel disappointed. However, a lot of people still give others a really hard time when they slip up, and it makes them feel like a letdown, plus it can seriously strain relationships.

If anything, you should actually discourage others from becoming perfectionists, because this obsessive compulsion to have everything just right can lead to depression, anxiety, chronic diseases, and a higher risk of suicide, according to a paper in the Review of General Psychology.

Allow people to make mistakes and learn from them, and think about how life would be if no one ever messed up. We’d be a world full of cold, heartless robots, and I don’t think anyone wants to see that reality play out!

3. Stop expecting them to agree with every word you say.

Even the best of friends don’t agree on everything, so don’t get upset when people challenge what you say, or simply have a different opinion. The world would be quite boring if no one ever disagreed; our unique perspectives and beliefs allow the planet to keep evolving and moving toward better solutions.

Think about what would happen if we all agreed with continuing to use fossil fuels to power our cars, houses, and just about everything in our lives…we wouldn’t have solar panels and electric cars if no one challenged the mainstream!

4. Stop expecting them to read your mind.

Some people have a more finely tuned intuition, but others just can’t read feelings or faces as well. Just because you might be more sensitive and understanding of how others feel doesn’t mean other people are on the same wavelength.

Not everyone wants to become a psychic, so express yourself clearly so others don’t have to guess your thoughts all the time. Honest, open communication builds stronger relationships, too.

5. Stop expecting them to pick you up every time you fall.

Of course, good friends and family will help you when you need it, but don’t count on them to brush the dirt off your shoulders every time. Maybe they have their own internal struggles and can’t carry the weight of both your problems and theirs at the moment, so try to understand their point of view.

They want to help, but just can’t for the time being. That doesn’t mean they don’t care, it just means you have to channel your inner warrior and fight your own battles sometimes.

6. Stop expecting them to understand you.

“Not everyone will understand your journey. That’s fine. It’s not theirs to make sense of – it’s yours.” – Unknown

As long as you understand you, you won’t feel the need to gain acceptance from others. Then, the fact that they just don’t “get” you won’t really phase you anymore.

7. Stop expecting them to treat you how you treat them.

Ideally, everyone would follow the golden rule, but we don’t live in a perfect world. Until everyone becomes more conscious, we will just have to accept that people will still treat us poorly because they lack a true relationship with themselves.

View their attitude from a compassionate stance, and you won’t feel so hurt if people don’t treat you as kindly as you treat them.

8. Stop expecting them to be the same person they were a year ago.

People change over time based on their experiences and circumstances.

Every day, people fight a tough battle that no one truly understands but them, so keep this in mind when you get the urge to judge them. Love everyone no matter what or who they’ve become, not just if they meet your ideals or standards.

9. Stop expecting them to always have everything together.

Life throws everyone a curveball from time to time, and it may take people longer than expected to make it up to the plate. Have compassion for others, and understand that everyone is just trying to do the best they can. Focus on bringing more value to the world and into your relationships, and don’t try to control or chastise others for how they handle their lives.

10. Stop expecting them to give you love if you don’t first offer it to yourself.

All relationships start and end with you, so truly have to cultivate love within yourself first if you want it to make that full circle back to you. Using others to shower you with the love you refuse to give yourself will only lead to strained, insincere relationships. Developing a more loving attitude toward yourself, however, will bring about beautiful, thriving relationships.

“Don’t forget to fall in love with yourself first.” – Carrie Bradshaw

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Every day is a day to shine. Shine on!