It’s not always easy to know if someone special is paying attention to you and is interested in something more than friendship. If only life were as cut and dry as dating on the internet, where you can hide behind a screen and pour out your heart.

In the real world, you need to rely on subtle clues from body language.

You’re at a social gathering, and an exciting person approaches and comments on your hair. Could they be hitting on you, or do they just like your hair? It’s hard to figure out the difference between someone being a lovely human being or if they’re giving you some much-needed attention.

25 Ways to Know If Someone Is Paying Attention to You

If you’re unlucky in love or don’t have much experience in the field, then you may not know if someone is into you. You certainly don’t want to make a fool of yourself, so it’s best to look for these subtle clues before you say or do anything. If you’re flattered at their advances, then you can flirt back, as it helps them to know if you’re interested.

However, if you find yourself unattracted to them, then you can ignore them and move right along. Watch for the following signs.

paying attention
1. Asking Lots of Questions

They seem to be a chatterbox that has more questions than a five-year-old. They want to know more about you, and they’re trying to dig for information. Be careful, it could be a narcissistic person just wanting to get in good with you, but it could be the person you’ve been waiting for too.

2. Body Contact

Has this person accidentally brushed into you? Did they walk past you more times than necessary so that they could touch you? Oh, they won’t do this on purpose yet, but they are eager to feel your soft skin or smell your fragrance.

3. Dilated Pupils

It might seem strange that you would look close enough to see someone’s pupils, but did you know that your pupils dilate when the brain likes what it sees? Who knew body language could be stimulated and acted out as a brain command?

4. Full of Compliments

You can brush off a compliment or two as just being nice, but when this person seems to talk constantly about how wonderful you are and look, then it’s a big sign. This person is paying attention to you and wants you to reciprocate.

5. Their Eyes Meet Yours

When you think someone is attractive, your eyes can’t help but wander towards that person. Your subconscious brain can do this without you even realizing it. If someone can’t take their eyes off you, then it’s a sign that they like what they see.

6. Gestures of Affection

Did they hold the door for you, get you a refill on a drink, or pull out a chair on your behalf? Little gestures of affection can go a long way. This person wants you to see their good manners, and they’re interested in you.

7. Lip Licking

Okay, so this is one of the more apparent gestures, but if someone is paying attention to you and likes what they see, they may lick their lips. Again, they’re probably not doing this for a show or to gain attention, but their brain is causing them to make subconscious moves because it likes what it sees.

8. Nervous and Jittery

If someone is crushing on you, then it’s only standard for them to become nervous or jittery in your presence. They may talk at a fast pace, put their hands in their pockets, or go through their purse.

It’s also not uncommon for them to fidget with their cell phone and act like they have important business to take care of. The truth is that their heart is beating out of their chest, and they don’t know how to control it.

9. They Want Your Digits

If someone asks you for your phone number, it’s a pretty good indication that they are into you. Now, you may not be ready to give out those numbers just yet, so this bold move might catch you off guard.

10. Social Media Stalker

If you just met this person and they start following you on social media, then it’s a sign they’re paying attention to you. Now, if they start commenting on all your pictures and posts, then it’s the most significant sign you will get that they’re crushing bad. They’re begging for you to notice them.

11. Making Plans

What if this person starts making plans and including you in them? Well, if they see you in their future, they might have no issue being a bit presumptuous and including you in some activities.

12. Coffee Date

Did they ask you if you would like to get coffee or drinks sometime? They may be interested in having some good conversation, but the chances are that they are into you for more than drinks.

13. Share Future Goals

Whether you know this person or not, someone that starts telling you all their hopes and dreams is suspect. They probably want to see if your futures can align. Go ahead and give them a little bit of bait and see how far they drag your line. Remember, there are lots of fish in the sea, and you could be about to reel in a big one.

14. Hanging on Every Word

It doesn’t matter if there are 100 people in the room. When you speak, this person is all ears. They laugh at your jokes, even if they’re not that funny. This person is interested in what you have to say.

15. The 411 on Your Past

So, anytime a person is interested in your past relationships, it’s probably because they want to see what your future looks like. They want to know if you are more of a person who dates around or looking to settle down.

16. Kindness is Key

Everyone should be kind, but this person seems to be going out of their way to be kind to you. They want you to know how sweet, pleasant, and charming they are.

17. Honesty

If someone starts telling you about their love life, their triumphs, and devastations, then it’s because they want you to know them. They’re trusting you and cross a privacy line to see how you react.

18. Friendly with Your Friends

Not only does this person seem friendly to you, but they want to get to know your friends. If they seem genuinely interested in hooking up with your group, then they’re trying hard to win your affection.

19. All Smiles

They can’t help it; every time they look at you, they are beaming. There’s something about you that they can’t help but smile at because they like what they see.

20. Good Impressions

No matter where you two cross paths, they always try to make a good impression. They want you to know that they’re a stand-up person that you can’t live without.

21. Toe Tendencies

The next time you’re around this person, watch where their toes are pointed. Their toes might be pointed right at you if you have their attention. An article in Cosmopolitan about body language states that the toes point in the direction the heart wants to head.

22. Your Opinion Matters

If someone asks your opinion about important things, then they trust you. If they ask your opinion about their future or significant purchases, then they might be into you.

23. Mirroring Your Movements

If a person is engrossed in your conversation, then they may mirror your movements. If you cross your arms, they’ll cross their arms. Additionally, they’re not doing this on purpose, but they are just so into you they can’t help themselves.

24. Introduction to Their Friends

If someone is paying attention to you and likes what they see, they will likely want to introduce you to their friends. Now, if they’re with their family and want to introduce you, then they’ve got it bad for you.

25. Adjusting Their Gait

It’s never romantic when someone dashes ahead of you or your friends. When someone is interested and you’re walking about, they will match their gate with yours. They don’t want to risk missing one word you say.

paying attention
Final Thoughts on Discerning When Someone Is Paying Attention to You

If there’s so many fish in the sea, why does it have to be challenging to find the right one? Why is it that people always tend to latch onto the sharks that want to do nothing but cause destruction? Alas, there are some great people out there, but you need to be open and receptive to their advances.

When you like a person and think they may want you to, then make your move. Since you’ve noticed they’re paying attention to you, then show them a little attention in return. What can it hurt anyway?