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Psychology Explains How to Face Your Fears and Let Them Go

July 8, 2022 by Lakeisha Ethans

Fear is a standard part of life. For some, it’s easy to push past. But some powerful fears are difficult to overcome and can significantly grip one’s life and soul. How can you fight back against anxiety that feels so overwhelming? Here’s how psychology explains how to face your fears and let them go.

1. Understand The Fears That You Face

It can seem counterproductive to release fear by focusing on it first. But if you don’t name the problem, you can’t solve it or overcome it. That’s why facing your fear is the first step in letting it go. To understand your fear, you can try the following methods:

· Accept Your Fears

A lot of times, it’s tempting to dismiss a fear because it seems or feels silly. You might say, “I have no right to be afraid of this. Lots of people face worse things.”

Or you may say, “I shouldn’t be afraid because someone I know isn’t afraid of this!”

These ways of thinking are counterintuitive. To release fear, we must accept its presence and admit to it. This includes not being ashamed of seemingly “silly” fears or anxiety not rooted in anything deep or complex. Not all fear has to stem from something severe and dire, and studies show that the biology of fear is about more than phobia and trauma.

· Write Down Your Fears

It is already a brave step in the right direction to name and detail your fears. You can write in a journal, on a piece of paper, or even type on a notes app or word document. Whatever works for you! The important part is locating your fears and putting them into the tangible form of words and digestible language. As much detail as possible, search for hidden worries, too.

· Seek The Roots Of Your Anxiety

Why do you have this fear? Some conerns are easy to trace. For example, maybe you’re afraid of dogs because you were chased by one when you were younger. But other fears are rooted in more complex things. Fears of failure, abandonment, and loss of control, for example, provide cover for more serious internal issues. Understanding the problems underscore your phobias can help demystify them, making them easier to process and comprehend.

· Get A Realistic Perspective

Lots of people fear things, but they do them anyway. Why? Because they have perspective. Getting perspective on your fear means understanding its true weight in the real world. What are the actual chances of it happening? What is the reward that may come if you brave it? Will a negative result be as bad as your fearful thoughts tell you? Realism is not the most capable combatant of fear, but it is still powerful and can be a good thing to hold on to. It reminds your logical brain that you are safe so that the rest of your brain has the energy to process less realistic emotions.

2. Redirect Your View On Your Fear

The way we view fear is what has the greatest chokehold on us. Redirecting that perspective can completely transform how you interact with fear and all of its madness. Here’s how to do this:

· Respond To Your Fears

When your fear begins to tell you something, put it on pause and respond to it, conversing with it as if it were a third party. Ask your fear why it feels this way, then validate those emotions and redirect them. For example, you may say, “I am afraid to accept this project because I am afraid that I will perform badly and be embarrassed.”

You can then respond, “It’s always scary to try something new and work on something so big. But think of all the experience we’ll gain and how much we’ll grow! It won’t matter if we performed badly in a year because those lessons will have moved us on to greater things.” This perspective shift is a great way to begin tackling the darkest voices of your fear.

· Be Open To Possibility

In the face of fear, it is easy to shut down and try to block everything out, but don’t fall into that trap. When something frightening happens, open your heart instead. Remind yourself that there is a chance this will not be what you fear. Remind yourself of reality and remain open to that reality. Remind yourself about what you have done to overcome your fear, and stay open to the idea that things will be different this time.

Maintaining openness bravely and boldly by focusing on silver linings will slowly but surely change your perspective to seek out the positivity in life, not the fear. Do note that we’re not referring to behaving foolishly or unwisely. If a particular approach isn’t working, you can change it without closing yourself off by saying, “Since that didn’t work, I am open to the possibility that this other method may work instead.” You can also say, “I know that there is something I can do that will make this work, and I am open to doing things in new ways to achieve that.”

· Respond To Fears With Surrender

This sounds like another counterproductive step, but it’s a huge one. Letting go of fear involves accepting that it exists and not getting worked up over it. When your fearfulness says, “But what if we mess up?” respond, “Then I surrender, and I’ll try again.”

This mantra reminds you that there is a tomorrow and that you can lose a battle without losing a war. When you release your fear, you silence the noise in your head by accepting its presence. It’s challenging to learn, but it’s powerful once you do.

3. Practice Calming Techniques For Anxiety

When you’re in the heat of fear, it can be difficult to calm down correctly, even after accepting it, responding to it, and being open to it. Your body sometimes takes a while to catch up to your mind’s decision. This is when you should try a few calming techniques. These are great ways to bring yourself back to reality and can aid in releasing fear. Here are some to try:

· Visualization

Visualization is the act of imagining something calming or positive. It’s a powerful way to face your fears and calm down from them. Studies deem it effective in managing anxiety responses. Go somewhere quiet and calm, sit or lie in a comfortable position, and relax as you envision your happy place.

Think of somewhere calming in nature and fully immerse yourself in that imagery. Ask yourself what pleasant scents you smell and what relevant sounds you hear in this visualized world. You’ll feel calmer very quickly! You can also use visualization to imagine overcoming a fear. Your brain will automatically pick up on that and will start to believe that it has already overcome the fear, making it easier to face it again later.

· Mindfulness

Mindfulness is the act of being present in the here and now. It can be performed in a meditative state but help in everyday life. To achieve mindfulness, pay attention to your body and the world around you. When you feel fear, what parts of you show signs of it? Is your heart racing? Are your palms sweating? Then, look at your thought and detach yourself from them. Watch them pass over your head as a witness would watch cars going by. Do not actively engage with them. Watch them sail by.

· Speak To Yourself With A Kind Voice

A lot of people become their own worst bullies in times of fear. You might speak to yourself with judgment or shame or be disappointed that you didn’t overcome it this time. Don’t do this. Instead, talk to yourself kindly. Pat yourself for trying and compliment yourself on what you did well and how you handled the situation. Commend yourself for being brave and for continuing to be brave. When you treat yourself like a friend instead of an enemy, fears are less frightening.

4. Get Professional Help For Anxiety

You may need help to face the things that frighten you, and there’s no shame in admitting that reality. Debilitating phobias, such as ones tied to mental health conditions and disorders or rooted in intense phobias, can be too difficult to fight on your own. Professional therapists can help people overcome these more complex fears, and research finds them effective!

Fears can be rooted in anxiety disorders, post-traumatic stress disorders, and eating disorders or be born from genuine phobias that impact everyday life. If you find yourself constantly thinking about your fear or having everyday life made more difficult because of it, you may need professional aid. Treatment options include:

· Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

This type of fear-facing treatment involves desensitizing you to your fears via small steps that replace negative thoughts and reactions with neutral or positive ones.

· Exposure Therapy or Immersion Therapy

These types of therapy involve regularly exposing you, in small incremental ways, to the subjects of your phobia. The goal is to teach comfort or neutrality in the face of different fear-creating experiences and topics by getting you used to those subjects.

· Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)

This type of treatment teaches acceptance, allowing you to view your phobias in a less threatening way. This then minimizes the impact of your worry on your everyday life.

· Psychoanalytic Therapy

Psychoanalysis involves delving deep into the roots of various fears, especially those caused by trauma or anxiety disorders. The goal is to uproot the source of your fear, so you are no longer affected by them, as the original problem is resolved or mostly resolved.

Professional help can also assist by training you with relaxation techniques and giving you a safe space to vent or talk about these fears, which is already helpful.

Final Thoughts On How To Face Your Fears And Let Them Go

Fear is temporary, and it can be worked through. Understand your anxiety, redirect your perspectives on them, and learn to calm your mind and body when fear takes over. If you need help, you can get professional aid to teach you the best ways to work through more complex or intense fears and phobias.

Mental Health Expert Explains How Staying Focused Can Reduce Anxiety

July 8, 2022 by Kristen Lawrence

If you have a hard time staying focused, it could contribute to heightened anxiety and restlessness. People with anxiety tend to have a more robust fight-or-flight response, increasing their cortisol levels. This makes it challenging to stay on task, especially if it involves tedious mental work such as studying for exams.

Having a heightened fear response also causes people with anxiety to scan for dangers in their environment constantly. Unfortunately, their brains can’t easily discern between threatening and non-threatening stimuli. This hypervigilance distracts them from tasks that require intense concentration, which can cause problems in work and school.

However, mindfulness and meditation can increase focus, reducing anxiety and cortisol levels. Below, we’ll explain a bit more about why remaining in the present moment can invoke a sense of peace.

Researchers Explain Why Increasing Concentration Lowers Anxiety

Before we get into the benefits of meditation for reducing anxiety, it’s important to remember that other remedies may be necessary. Meditation and mindfulness can enhance many aspects of life, but they may not wholly cure anxious feelings.

Some people may require medication, therapy such as CBT, or diet and exercise to combat anxiety. Remember to do what works best for you, and most of all, practice self-compassion.

However, research does show that mindfulness helps you stay focused, which reduces anxiety and stress. According to a study from the University of Waterloo, just ten minutes of daily mindfulness meditation can prevent mind wandering and anxiousness. If you struggle with intrusive, repetitive thoughts, meditation can help turn the volume down in your brain.

The study included 82 participants with diagnosed anxiety disorders. Researchers wanted to gauge how 10 minutes of meditation impacted their anxiety levels. Surprisingly, they observed noticeable decreases in repetitive, anxious thinking incidences when participants practiced present-moment awareness.

“Our results indicate that mindfulness training may have protective effects on mind wandering for anxious individuals,” said Mengran Xu, a researcher and Ph.D. candidate at Waterloo. “We also found that meditation practice appears to help anxious people to shift their attention from their own internal worries to the present-moment external world, which enables better focus on a task at hand.”

Mindfulness Can Benefit Everyone, Not Just People With Anxiety

For the study, the research team asked participants to perform a task on a computer. While they did the job, researchers introduced frequent distractions to observe how well they focused. Then, they placed the participants into two groups: the control group listened to an audio story while the other meditated for 10 minutes. Finally, the team reevaluated each group to see how each exercise affected them.

“Mind wandering accounts for nearly half of any person’s daily stream of consciousness,” said Xu. “For people with anxiety, repetitive off-task thoughts can negatively affect their ability to learn, to complete tasks, or even function safely.

“It would be interesting to see what the impacts would be if mindful meditation was practiced by anxious populations more widely.”

Mindfulness means remaining focused on the present moment without judgment. This awareness forms the basis of all yoga and meditation practices, with the goal being the complete cessation of thoughts. Of course, it takes many years or even lifetimes of practice to reach this point.

But everyone can still benefit from mindfulness, as it teaches you to observe your thoughts without reacting to them. You can begin detaching from your thoughts by becoming friends with your mind. This way, they won’t have so much power over you.

Other Ways to Be More Focused (Besides Meditation)

If you’re a chronic daydreamer who struggles to complete tasks, you’re not alone. With so many distractions, most people have difficulty focusing in today’s world. Instead, we would escape the chaos and stressors rather rather than deal with them, lowering our resilience. You will feel better in the long run by boosting your focus since your brain won’t be as reactive to stimuli.

You can also practice these habits to focus your mind:

Take a break from your smartphone. Smartphones and other technologies have become notorious for hijacking our attention spans and increasing anxiety. To combat this growing problem, set aside a specific time for smartphone use each day. Check emails, chat with friends, or do activities you enjoy, then turn off the phone. You’ll find that you can stay focused throughout the day when you don’t check your phone as often.
Pay more attention to other people. Sadly, the modern world doesn’t seem to prioritize personal relationships anymore. We’re all engrossed in our own lives yet feel lonelier than ever. However, relationships reduce anxiety and foster feelings of love and affection. We need each other to survive, so reach out to others around you. Putting more focus on others will help you forget your problems, at least temporarily. Plus, making a difference in people’s lives promotes positive physiological changes, such as reduced depression.
Support your brain health with a proper diet. Eating a balanced diet with whole grains, fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and dairy can keep your brain sharp. Studies have found that omega-3 fatty acids, in particular, can boost concentration and cognitive function in general. Fish such as salmon, herring, and tuna provide the best animal-based sources of omega-3s. Plant-based options include flax, chia, hemp seeds, and canola oil in your diet.

Final Thoughts on How Staying Focused Reduces Anxiety

Certain mental disorders such as anxiety, depression, ADHD, and PTSD can make it challenging to remain focused. Many people with these disorders have overactive fight-or-flight responses, which can cause hypervigilance. However, studies show that mindfulness meditation can lower stress and anxiety levels, even if practiced for just 10 minutes per day. In addition to being aware of the present moment, other lifestyle changes can quell anxiety. Using smartphones moderately, eating plenty of omega-3 fatty acids, and helping others can improve mental health. These habits increase concentration and create more peace in life and support brain health.

Biohackers Reveal 3 Tricks for a Longer Life

July 8, 2022 by Lakeisha Ethans

The term “biohackers” might seem like something from a sci-fi movie. While the idea of biohacking has been used precisely for making sci-fi movies and series, that’s not the only reason it’s suitable. Biohacking is a newer idea that seems to be gaining traction with people looking to live a longer life.

Living a longer, healthier life is probably on everyone’s to-do list. But, right now, we are bound by our genetic constraints to live somewhere around seventy years. Of course, this average depends on many factors, higher in more developed states. A person’s genes, as well as their environment and lifestyle, influence life expectancy.

But, as of right now, people can only improve their environment and lifestyle. While many scientists are trying to “cure” aging, this doesn’t seem achievable in our lifetime. Gene modification might be a solution for the future, but right now, we have to rely on other methods. Because of this, there has been a rise in the number of biohackers practicing. And their plans seem to be effective.

Here are some tricks that biohackers use to ensure they’ll live a longer life.

What Are Biohackers?

The easiest way to describe the concept of biohacking is the idea of using technology to influence human genetics. But it’s not limited to using technology to achieve their goals. In fact, the most mainstream form of biohacking is DIY biology, which deals with using science to enhance the human condition. While most biohackers go for the DIY biology approach, some choose to incorporate nutrigenomics or grinder techniques in their lifestyles.

DIY Biology

DIY biology is the most reliable genre of biohacking, as it’s spread by people with education and experience in the biological field. Some describe it as the predecessor of the biohacking movement. This field was pioneered in 2005 by bio-economist Rob Carlson. This movement hopes to end the era of “garbage biology,” as Carlson called it.

It includes innovative life science solutions that also contribute to the economy. Carlson believed that the average person could build a functional genetic engineering lab at home with as little as $1,000. That same year, Carlson put his money where his mouth was and made a garage lab from where he worked on projects he had started at the Molecular Sciences Institute in Berkley.

This movement encourages ordinary people to learn more about science from reliable sources and apply the finding in their daily life. It also aims to create more openness in scientific spaces. As a result of this phenomenon, biohacking spaces started opening worldwide, with the first spaces opening in 2010.

Nutrigenomics

Nutrigenomics is a field later incorporated into the biohacking movement. Biohackers started being interested in how their food interacts with genes, and a whole subculture emerged. In essence, nutrigenomics studies the effects of nutrition on gene expression. But it also examines how genetic variations affect the nutritional environment. This data could bring more awareness to how specific dietary regimes affect our health.

A combination of nature and nurture governs our health, and there is no way to determine whether someone will fall ill, for example. But nutrigenomics aims to lower the risks of early demise by making sure our genes can be appropriately expressed. Because molecules in food can affect gene expression, it’s crucial to understand how to control this interaction. If done correctly, nutrigenomics aims to allow individuals to attain their full genetic potential.

Grinders

Grinders are potentially the sci-fi type of biohackers, as their subculture stems from transhumanist philosophies. They aim to integrate mechanical parts into the human body. Essentially, they want to become cybernetic organisms (cyborgs). For example, a colorblind grinder might use a bone-conducting implant in their skull that would allow them to hear colors.

Three Tricks Biohackers Use for a Longer Life

Not all enhancements done by grinders have to be drastic, and not all grinders want to become full-fledged robots. Something as simple as having an implant in your hand that stores all your medical records is considered grinding. So, any biohacker can use some of the knowledge grinders have to increase their longevity.

1. They Use Wearable Technology

Grinders mostly use this idea, but that has become mainstream because it’s not as invasive as other grinder methods. Wearable technologies are implants inside the body to enhance and prolong human life. This idea is trendy among biohackers as it doesn’t require much effort. It’s not a significant change in your daily routine that you have to maintain for your whole life.

Wearable technologies aren’t exactly a new idea. The hearing aids humans have used for so long are examples of such technologies. It’s just that there have been many new developments lately in this field. This is also because interest is continuously rising.

One of the most sophisticated examples of wearable technologies is AI hearing aids or even VR headsets. But there are many technologies, like disposable skin patches that transmit patient data to devices in healthcare facilities, that are less complex. These technologies don’t have to fall into a single category. They aren’t just meant to enhance your physiological capabilities.

Even smartwatches or Bluetooth headphones are examples of wearable technologies. Of course, biohackers are more interested in the ones that can enhance human life from a medical standpoint. And they hope that these technologies will evolve in a way that will allow them to override the limitations of the human body and enable them to live longer.

2. They Aim to Acquire Scientific Knowledge on How to Achieve a Longer Life

A big part of biohacking centers around advocating for open-source science. Most biohackers see an issue with how science is reserved chiefly for academic spaces, and they are right. They believe people have a right to know scientific details without paying for scientific articles, for example. And available medicine is a big part of their advocacy.

One of the best tips one could learn from biohackers is that everyone needs to understand some basics of science to have a longer life. Biohackers don’t operate alone and unsupervised. It’s a community that unites specialists and people willing to learn. If you go to a certified biohacking space, you will find a well-structured community that operates in the safest way possible.

You can take classes, talk to advisors, and access high-tech equipment in this community. All of these are under rigorous safety standards, so the risk is no higher than if you’d go straight to the doctor. These spaces will teach you that information is the key to living a good and long life. The medical field isn’t as advanced as it could be, and some of its procedures are outdated. In these biohacking spaces, people are free to use newer techniques to respond to specific issues.

For example, biohackers work toward using 3D printers for as many procedures as possible. As of right now, the most notable use of 3D printers is for custom-printed orthoses. So, if you want to acquire more scientific knowledge, you might want to consider joining one of these spaces.

3. Biohackers Use Nutrition to Their Advantage

You might think that you need to eat only vegetables and lean meat for longer and better life. But that’s not the case, and biohackers know it. The most important thing you can do is learn how foods interact with your genes and use that to your advantage. For example, biohackers don’t even eliminate caffeine from their diets. On the contrary, they use it as a productivity booster.

They even use something they call bulletproof coffee (which combines coffee, oil, and butter) as a substitute for breakfast. Bulletproof coffee enthusiasts claim that it gives you enough productivity for the whole day and even helps with weight loss. Not all diet tips from biohackers sound as extreme as this one. The most well-known advice is to use an elimination diet. What you need to do to follow this diet is eliminate a particular food for a week or so and see what happens.

Then, reintroduce the food slowly into your diet, and note the changes. This technique can affect your mood, energy levels, and overall well-being. Biohackers use this method to figure out if they are allergic to a particular food. If, after reintroduction, symptoms like rashes appear, then you know you are allergic to that food.

Another popular diet amongst biohackers is intermittent fasting. This diet is highly customizable, depending on your needs. Some people go to the extreme and only have a four-hour window in which they can eat. But the most popular type of intermittent fasting is the 16-8 one. In this diet, you have an eight-hour window to eat, and outside that window, you can only drink water.

This diet lowers insulin levels, which helps you burn fat more efficiently. It also helps repair damaged tissue and prevents diseases such as cancer. But you should be wary that people with diabetes, low blood pressure, and other issues shouldn’t go for this diet.

Final Thoughts On Three Tricks Biohackers Use for a Longer Life

Biohacking might be the answer to our concerns about living a longer life. It’s a newer spin on science that tries to incorporate things like technology into our daily life. It’s also concerned with reaching the perfect balance between good genetics and a good environment. It aims not only to make life longer but also more comfortable.

Biohackers fall into many categories, but they all want to reach the same goal: longevity. For that purpose, they take different paths. But all types of biohackers have tips that genuinely work and are worth a look. And by contributing to research in fields like wearable technologies, they help make advancements in science.

But they also focus on simpler things, such as changes in one’s diet. Things like intermittent fasting have improved people’s quality of life, so maybe that’s something you’d want to implement in your lifestyle. But, potentially, the most important thing you can learn from biohackers is that open-source science is essential. The more you know about science, the better and longer your life can be.

18 Behaviors Bullies Display Before Revealing Their Intentions

July 7, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

Many people believe bullying only happens during childhood, but that’s not entirely accurate. Bullies continue their behavior into adulthood, filling a regular role in your life. Their behavior is often more subtle and thought out than a child’s, but it’s still there.

Anyone in your life can be a bully, so watch for it no matter where you are. Some of the people you might experience cruelty from including your:

Boss or co-worker
Romantic partner
Neighbor
Sales or business representatives
Family members
Friends
Social media contacts
Acquaintances

Identifying bullying behavior can help you figure out the people who don’t want what’s best for you. You have options, and there are things you can do as a victim or a bystander.

Types of Adult Bullies

Cruel people come in different forms and use different tactics to hurt the people around them. The situation is detrimental to your well-being, from physical harm to emotional abuse.

Some of the types of bullies to watch out for include the following:

Verbal: They often shame and insult you using criticism or cruel teasing. Sometimes they use disrespectful or threatening behavior.
Passive-aggressive: They usually act kind and friendly and then take unexpected turns. You’ll notice eye-rolling, rude facial expressions, and ridicule. They also like to isolate their victims to hide their intentions from others.
Material: They use their power to intimidate and control you. This person could be your boss or manager, or they could have control of your finances.
Cyber: They send malicious emails, social media messages, comments, or text messages. Their behavior doesn’t always surface in person because they feel safer doing it over the internet.
Physical: They might show violent tendencies like raising their fists or pretending like they’re going to hurt you. Sometimes they throw or break things to get their point across. They also engage in violent acts like domestic, physical, and sexual abuse.

Eighteen Behaviors Bullies Display Before Revealing Their Intentions

Watch for these signs if you think someone might have cruel intentions.

1. Being Passive-aggressive Can Indicate Bullying

This type of person works to avoid confrontation, resorting to indirect cruelty. They might do things like pout, gossip, or procrastinate when they know you’re waiting on them. These behaviors are their subtle ways of inflicting harm on those around them.

2. Giving the Silent Treatment

Many adult bullies give the silent treatment to get back at you. Rather than talk about things that bother them, they lead you to figure it out while they pretend you don’t exist. They’ll continue ignoring you until you give them what they want or say you were wrong.

3. Bullies Are Controlling

A bully wants everything to go their way, and they won’t settle for anything less. They want everyone to go along with them and become more condescending the longer you hold out.

4. Bullies Love to Argue About Past Mistakes

Everyone makes mistakes, and a bully won’t let you forget about yours. While you must learn from your mistakes, you also must leave them in the past.

If someone in your life continually brings them up, it’s their way of being cruel. They want to remind you that you messed up, and it’s their subtle way of ridiculing you.

5. Lying or Pretending Not to Understand

A bully might make a point by saying they didn’t do something that they did do. They use lies to get their way, often blaming others for their mistakes. Sometimes they’ll even take credit for other people’s work.

This type of person often pretends not to understand things as a way to protect themselves. They also do it to get their way or get you to do their work for them.

6. Sabotage Is a Bullying Behavior

If someone ruins your project, destroys your items, or causes you to suffer for their gain, it’s sabotage. They want to see you fail and do whatever they can to make it happen.

7. Constant Criticism

Constantly judging and criticizing others is a sign of a bully. Unnecessary and unconstructive criticism is a way for them to tear you down so they can gain power and feel important. It causes decreased self-esteem and feelings of doubt or worthlessness.

8. A Bully Hopes to Instill Fear

Bullies want to gain control, and they’ll stop at nothing. They instill fear in others to gain what they need, often targeting innocent people.

9. Withholding Emotions

A bully might withhold emotions or approval until you do things the way they want you to. They won’t give any feedback unless you give in. Even if your method is effective, they’ll continue withholding because they didn’t get their way.

10. Isolation

Cruel people know their victims are easier to handle when alone. They find ways to isolate their victim to instill more fear and intimidation. If they can’t get you alone, they’ll do things to get others to stay away from you.

One example is when you introduce someone new to your group of friends. The new person might make things uncomfortable or act in a way that makes your friends not want to come around.

A bully wants to be the only person in your life so that they can control and benefit from your behavior. They worry your other friends will voice their concerns, so they want to get them out of the way.

Another example is that a cruel person singles people out. They won’t tell you about meetings or invite you to social activities with co-workers or mutual friends.

11. Frequent Temper Tantrums

Temper tantrums are natural for children, but you’ve likely seen a few adults have them. Adults have advanced their tantrum skills and understand how to wear others down and hit emotional triggers. It makes you feel abused and scarred and only benefits the bully.

Some examples of adult temper tantrums include:

Yelling and scream
Name-calling
Announcing your insecurities

12. They Gossip and Spread Misinformation

Bullies love to gossip, and they often start rumors about others. They talk badly behind people’s backs and then smile to their faces.

This behavior is incredibly hurtful to their victims, and the bully doesn’t show remorse. The bully does this because they have low self-esteem and feel better about making others feel bad.

13. Blaming Others

This type of person never takes responsibility for their mistakes. They blame others for what went wrong, even if no one else was involved. This behavior often creates chaos and hinders productivity.

14. They Ignore Boundaries

They do whatever they want, even if it makes other people uncomfortable. This type of person knows when they are crossing a boundary and does it anyway. You can reassert your boundary many times, and they’ll keep pushing.

15. Repeatedly Discussing the Same Idea

It’s a bad sign when someone keeps talking about the same thing, even after you’ve given your opinion. They’ll continue bringing it up until they convince you to agree with them.

If you didn’t answer their question how they wanted you to, they might keep asking it. They know that many people will eventually give in and tell them what they want to hear.

16. Bullying Often Involves Constant Complaining

Bullies complain all the time, and it seems like nothing can make them happy. They hold others to an impossible standard and complain no matter how hard you tried. You’ll often hear them complaining that someone else caused their negative feelings, too.

17. Always Saying No or Telling Someone They’re Wrong

The first thing out of a bully’s mouth is usually no. They don’t want to negotiate or discuss the situation, leaving nothing else for you to do.

Another common issue is that they tell others they are wrong even when they’re not. They tell people they are wrong for their feelings and that every statement is incorrect. Plus, they’ll do whatever they can to prove you wrong and undermine you.

18. Public Belittling

Bullies often publicly belittle their victims either in person or via the internet. They will point out your flaws and insecurities and attack your decisions. Afterward, they find people who will take their side on the matter.

How to Deal with Adult Bullies

Dealing with adult bullies isn’t fun, but it is possible. A few of the things you can do to protect yourself include:

Choosing which battles to fight: If you don’t see the person often and can mostly avoid them, it might be best to hold back your reaction.
Making eye contact: People have less empathy when they can’t see your eyes. While it’s tempting to turn away from a cruel person, you might benefit from making eye contact and showing your face.
Create space between you: Limit your interactions with the bully whenever possible. Move to the other side of the room or find another area to work on your task.
Confront them: They usually don’t like confrontation, so confrontation can sometimes stop their behavior. A bully will be less likely to target you if they know you won’t put up with it.

If these ideas don’t work, document every offense, primarily if it occurs at work. You never know when you will need to make a complaint or address the issue with a third party.

Final Thoughts on Behaviors Bullies Display

If you recognize any of these behaviors in someone you know, they are likely a bully. You shouldn’t have to deal with someone making you feel bad about yourself. Rather than giving in and letting bullies do what they want, find a way to make a change. It won’t be a fun process, but you can make it happen to improve your life.

11 Things That Prove All Important Things Come from Within

July 7, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

When life gets busy, it’s easy to forget about important things. You’ll start chasing external sources, following a path of less importance and meaning. If that happens to you, it’s time to start looking within because that’s where you’ll find what you’re looking for.

Most people think about the important things in life and sometimes even talk about them. However, they believe that what helps them gain these aspects of life comes from external sources.

Some prioritize money while others turn to finding success, thinking it’ll bring everything they need. However, these things don’t always lead to happiness and meaning because you must determine what ensures the quality of life.

Thinking of what makes your life worthwhile requires looking within, and that’s where you’ll find your answers. The important things stem from discovering and embracing who you are and your beliefs. Many aspects of life prove all important things come from within, and it’ll help you remember what matters.

11 Things That Prove How All Important Things in Life Come from Within

When life gets busy, it’s easy to forget about important things. You’ll start chasing external sources, following a path that won’t lead to meaning. If that happens to you, it’s time to start looking within because that’s where you’ll find what you’re looking for.

1. Helping Others is of Importance to Your Soul

When you help others, it shows that you’re a kind person. Tapping into who you make it easy to want to help others, and you’ll find fulfillment in it.

People won’t forget how you helped them, and you won’t forget how it made you feel. It benefits both of you, allowing you to recognize the importance of being a kind person. Helping others also helps build a support system that will be there when you’re in need, creating a lasting connection.

2. Self-Confidence Helps You Believe in Yourself

If success is important to you, improving your self-confidence is essential. You’ll be more likely to take on new experiences and overcome obstacles when you believe in yourself. Finding fulfillment comes from having faith that you can persevere and achieve your goals.

You can achieve anything you want if you believe in yourself and have a sense of self-worth. It’ll reaffirm that anything is possible, helping you take small steps toward your overall goal. With self-confidence, you can see beyond what’s right in front of you, helping you find meaning.

3. Having Goals Is One of the Important Thigns, As They Help You Reach Your Dreams

You must have goals to fulfill your purpose and achieve your dreams. Plans help you progress and keep track of how far you’ve come. They also help you figure out and focus on your priorities.

You’ll discover your purpose and talents when you set goals and take steps to achieve them. You’ll be less likely to seek answers from external sources too. It also helps you find the inner motivation it takes to persevere.

Additionally, setting goals allows you to get more out of your progress. Each time you hit a milestone, you’ll experience a moment of victory that pushes you forward. With frequent satisfaction, you’ll make more progress than before.

Setting a goal shows that you know what you want in life. It forces you to take time to reflect and understand yourself and your desires. Then, you can break your dreams down into realistic goals that allow you to live the life of your dreams.

Your goals inspire you, so you must figure out what you want. If your dreams aren’t true to who you are, you’ll never find fulfillment or meaning. Look within to find these answers and live your best life.

4. Happiness Is a Choice (and One of the Most Important Things in Life)

You can have plenty of money, success, and worldly objects and still not be happy. If you aren’t satisfied with who you are on the inside, you’ll be on a constant search for meaning and importance in life. You won’t find what you’re looking for anywhere because everything of importance comes from inside you.

If you want to find happiness, you must choose to be happy. It won’t come from a job, more money, a new home, or any physical object. Happiness only comes from within, and it sometimes requires choosing joy over immediate comfort.

Many people think of what they must achieve or gain to find happiness. If you feel this way, you still won’t find happiness even as you achieve your goals. It’ll always seem out of reach because you’re looking to external sources.

You must choose happiness each day, even on the bad days. Your life won’t be perfect, but you can choose joy no matter what happens. Do things that make you happy rather than going along with what you think you should do. Your happiness matters, and it all comes down to your decisions.

5. Love is How You Connect

Love is an intensely profound feeling, and it’s how you connect to the world around you. You connect to yourself, your family, friends, and other people through love. It’s a freeing emotion that opens your heart and allows you to align with others.

6. Positivity Leads to Inspiration

Positive thinking and optimism can make all the difference in your life. No matter what you want, it takes inspiration to make it happen. Negative thinking and self-talk will only set you back, interfering with your goals.

Have a positive approach even when you don’t have anyone supporting you. Anything can happen if you believe in yourself, and your thoughts must align with that. If you live with negative thinking, try using positive affirmations to create better habits.

Positive thinking not only motivates you but also helps you stay focused. What’s the importance of that? You’ll remain consistent in your progress and dedication to the process. Positivity also builds confidence, further improving your life.

7. Your Purpose Motivates You

Identifying your purpose can help motivate you toward your dreams. Your goal doesn’t have to include career achievements because there is more to life than work. Even if your purpose involves your career, it’s also essential to have a personal intention.

Your purpose keeps you focused on your journey, encouraging your best efforts daily. Think about what keeps you going and your reason for living life to the fullest. The important things that came to mind are what give you purpose.

Having a purpose keeps life exciting and gives you the confidence to take on new challenges. You’ll become a better version of yourself when you have something to work for.

8. Gratitude Leads to Happiness

When you’re grateful for what and who you have in life, you’ll find happiness and fulfillment. It helps you remember and appreciate all the good parts of your life. Gratitude encourages you to eliminate negative thinking because you’ll stay focused on the rest.

9. Self-Awareness Helps You Get to Know Yourself

Self-awareness means you’ve taken the time to explore who you are. You’ll understand yourself and feel confident in your values and beliefs. It helps you become conscious of your character and meaning in the world.

When you learn about yourself, you also learn to control anything negatively affecting you. You know to control how you react to things and how to heal yourself. Many people monitor, but you’ll never find the answers doing that.

10. Your Passions Bring Importance to Your Life

Your passions are one of the most important things in your life. Without passion, nothing will bring meaning. You can set and achieve all the goals you want, and you will still feel unfulfilled if you’re not passionate about it.

Goals can be frustrating sometimes, but passion will help you stay dedicated and motivated. You’ll see how the frustrations benefit the bigger picture and make you want to keep going. If you don’t know your passion, spend time experimenting to figure it out.

11. Hard Work Is One of the Most Important Things, Which Makes Everything Else Fall in Place

Hard work is essential for making anything happen. It starts within, and you must have the willpower to keep putting forth your best effort. You can’t simply trust that things will work out for you because that’s not how life works.

Get out there and take the necessary steps to achieve your goals. You can’t count on anyone else to make it happen for you either. Hard work is up to you, and it’s a choice you must make every day.

Working hard also means you quit blaming external sources for your lack of progress. Take responsibility for your life and use the tools you have right now to make your dreams come true. Let go of hesitation, procrastination, fear, and anything else that stops you from working hard.

Final Thoughts on Things That Prove All Important Things in Life Come from Within

These things prove that all things of value and importance come from within. Stop turning to external sources to find happiness and fulfillment. Look within, and you’ll find everything you’ve been searching for.

Everyone is different and should follow separate paths in life. All important things come from within, so you must rely on yourself to make the best choices for your life.

15 Hidden Manipulation Behaviors That Reveal a Controlling Person

July 7, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

A controlling person exhibits hidden manipulation behaviors that you might not recognize immediately. While you might envision an aggressive person, that’s not always the case. There are other subtle signs that someone might be manipulative you might not know about. In fact, these hidden manipulation behaviors speak volumes.

All relationships, romantic or otherwise, involve some social influence. However, no one should have control over aspects of your life. They shouldn’t want to change you or the things you love, either.

Remember that this situation doesn’t only affect romantic relationships. You can experience hidden manipulation behaviors from your friends, family members, your boss, or anyone else in your life.

Once you recognize the hidden manipulation behaviors that reveal a dominating person, you can learn how to deal with it. No matter the reason for this behavior, it’s not okay, and you should find a way to overcome it.

How a Manipulative person Controls People

A manipulator wants to use people for their benefit. They create a power imbalance and use other people to serve their agenda. They use psychological manipulation to take control over you and your life.

A controlling person wants to have power and make you ask for benefits or privileges. When this happens, it’s safe to say that the relationship is unhealthy. They want control over the details of other people’s lives, crossing a line into abusiveness.

If someone makes you feel embarrassed, inconsequential, or humiliated, it’s time to reassess. Think about your relationship with them and if they behave in the ways mentioned below. If you can identify the hidden manipulation behaviors, you can protect yourself.

Fifteen Hidden Manipulation Behaviors

These hidden manipulation behaviors can help you identify a dominating person in your life. You deserve people who love you for who you are and want the best for you. The following manipulation behaviors show that someone only wants to use you for their benefit.

1. They Do Favors, But Hidden Manipulation Expects Something in Return

A controlling person will do nice things for you, even when you don’t ask them to do it. However, they’ll expect a favor in return. If you don’t do what they want, they’ll make you feel guilty and continually remind you of what they did for you.

Once you repay one favor, they’ll continue the cycle and keep you indebted to them. They’ll also bring up the favors, sometimes listing them all, anytime you don’t give them their way.

2. They Pressure You Before You’re Ready

A manipulator controls you by pressuring you to decide before you’re ready. They give you little time to think things through, sometimes demanding an immediate answer. It’s their way of forcing you to do what they want because you don’t have time to consider the alternative.

3. They Only Want to Meet in Their Space

Dominating people prefer to meet where they are comfortable. They’ll choose places they feel in control, allowing them to dominate you. These areas might include their office, home, car, or any other space they own.

If they can’t meet you in one of these places, they’ll choose another spot where they’re comfortable. You’ll notice they always decide on a place you’re unfamiliar with.

4. Hidden Manipulation Pretends Not to Understand

Manipulative people often pretend ignorance, acting like they don’t understand what you want. They’ll pretend they don’t know what you want them to do or what they should do.

When they behave this way, it forces you to take on their responsibilities with yours. They also do it to make you uncomfortable or upset.

5. They Give Negative Information Without Warning

A dominating person will spring negative information on you without warning. They do it this way to disrupt your balance and gain an advantage.

Sometimes they’ll return on a deal they agreed to, but only after receiving what they wanted. Or, they’ll do it as you’re already working on your end of the deal.

Other times, the person will surprise you with the information that they can’t do something they said they would. They often give this information at an inconvenient time, such as at the last minute. This type of person doesn’t want you to have time to prepare for a change.

6. They Act Like the Expert on Everything

These people act like they’re more knowledgeable than others. They frequently tell people facts, statistics, and information that not everyone knows. You’ll notice that they only do it when it can give them an advantage over others.

Manipulative people use this tactic in financial, professional, and personal situations. They want to gain power over you by making it seem like they know more.

7. They Want Everything Their Way

If someone in your life won’t compromise on even minor issues, it’s a hidden manipulation behavior. They want you to wear what they like and do what they want. What you need or want won’t matter because they want everything their way.

8. Hidden Manipulation Does Not Admit to Blame

A manipulator typically refuses to accept blame. They don’t want to admit when they made a mistake, even when the situation is their issue. No matter what occurred, they refuse to accept blame.

Sometimes they’ll even blame you for causing them to make a mistake. The person will say you distracted them or interfered in some other way. Other times, they’ll blame you for things you weren’t even present for.

9. They Keep Pushing Even After You Say No

A dominating person isn’t good at accepting healthy boundaries. Even after you say no or clear your feelings, they’ll keep pushing and trying to change your mind.

This person won’t care about the situation or why you’re saying no. They all care about getting their way no matter what it takes.

10. Manipulative People Give the Silent Treatment

Someone who purposely ignores you is likely a controlling person. They’ll not respond to your phone calls, text messages, emails, or other methods of communication. It helps them feel superior because it makes you wait on them.

They also like that it places uncertainty in your mind, making you doubt yourself. These people use the silent treatment to gain control over you.

11. They Tell Mean Jokes to Make You Feel Weak

Manipulators make rude comments disguised as humor. They know these comments will upset you, and they do it to make you feel inferior and insecure. If someone makes mean jokes and makes you question yourself, you must find a way to handle it.

Controlling people to behave this way makes you look and feel bad. Some of the things they comment on include your:

Appearance
Possessions
Education
Credentials
Background
Fitness level

12. Hidden Manipulation Distorts the Truth

A dominating person manipulates the facts to distort the truth. They deny your reality and gain power with dishonesty. Some of the things they do include:

Lying
Making excuses
Being two-faced
Withholding information
Exaggerating
Understating

13. They’re Unpredictable and Moody

You never know what a manipulative person will do next or how they will behave. They keep you guessing so that you stay focused on them. Their moods change drastically, causing you to question where you stand with them.

14. They Raise Their Voice and Exhibit Negativity

Controlling people often raise their voices during discussions. They think that if they speak loudly or exhibit negative behavior, you’ll give in to what they want. These people will also likely stand during the discussion or use animated gestures.

15. They Do Anything to Be the Center of Attention

A manipulative person always wants to be the center of attention. If you experience a victory, they’ll rush in to try and upstage you. They also create drama to get people to pay attention to them.

If you talk about something exciting, they’ll overshadow it with their life issues. They’ll change the subject and talk about something that went wrong for them. When they do this, they’re trying to get you to feel bad for them, ruining your moment.

Tips on How to Handle Manipulative People

At some point, everyone deals with a manipulative person who wants to control their life. Whether it’s your boss, a family member, a friend, or your spouse, you must learn how to handle it. If one method doesn’t work, try the next, and keep going until you achieve the desired results.

If the behavior is manageable, you can talk to the offender. Tell them how you feel, avoiding placing blame. If talking to them doesn’t work, try the following:

Walk away until they calm down
Refuse to give in
Stop reading the text messages or emails they send
Set and enforce boundaries
Be clear about what you think is happening

You might need to end the relationship if nothing seems to ease the situation. You deserve happiness, and the people in your life shouldn’t interfere with that. If you can’t eliminate it, limit your time with that person or ensure there’s always a third-party present.

Final Thoughts on Hidden Manipulation Behaviors That Reveal a Controlling Person

If someone makes you feel bad about yourself, it’s a sign of hidden manipulation behaviors. Please don’t ignore your feeling because It’s there for a reason.

These behaviors can help you identify a controlling person in your life. Don’t let the situation continue, or it’ll create more significant issues in your life. You deserve people who care about you, so don’t settle for anything less.

10 Ways to Tell If You’re Living the Life You Deserve

July 7, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

You deserve to live the best, most meaningful life possible. If you’re unsure if you’re living it, take a moment to assess your life. These signs will help you see if you’re living the fulfilled life you deserve.

It’s easy to look at your life and see the things that didn’t work out as planned. You might recall a person you lost, a goal you didn’t achieve, or a dream that didn’t work out. Everyone has these moments, but you shouldn’t fixate on them.

When you fixate on the things that didn’t work out, you’ll always feel empty or sad. You’ll lose meaning and feel unfilled, searching for something to help you feel better. It’s time to stop looking for fulfillment from outside sources because it’s already within.

These feelings indicate that you aren’t living the meaningful life you deserve. If you think that’s the case for you, these signs can help you identify areas of your life that need work. Or, they’ll help you realize that you’re already living a meaningful life.

Ten Signs of a Meaningful Life

These signs can help you determine if you’re living the meaningful life you deserve. Life is short, and it goes by fast, so you must make the most of each day.

1 – You Have Enough of What You Need

Think about your life and how many of the essentials you have. You’re already off to a good start if you have food to eat, clean water to drink, and a roof over your head.

Next, consider whether your vital organs are functioning and intact. If so, that’s another blessing that shows you have a chance at a healthy life.

You might think these things are minimal and don’t signify a meaningful life, but they are plenty. Many people don’t have these things, so don’t lose sight of the blessings in your life. Let these necessities be enough when you’re going through a hard time, and you’ll always have something to be thankful for.

2 – You Have People Who Cherish You and Want Build a Meaningful Life With You

When you feel empty, take a moment to think about all the people who care about you. Consider those who would be affected if you suddenly weren’t in their lives anymore.

Don’t only think about the people who love you deeply and know you intimately. Many other people in the world would be sad about losing you. These people are the ones who appreciate you and know you in different ways.

Think of those who recognize your voice on the phone or smile when they see you. You might think of the person who remembers how you like your coffee or enjoys seeing your life updates. People who see you as a meaningful person don’t always have a deep connection with you.

3 – You Have Responsibilities–and Feel Fulfilled by Them

It’s sometimes hard to think of the daily tasks of your life as meaningful, but they are. The seemingly mundane reality of each day can begin to feel pointless if you don’t have the right mindset. However, even if your life doesn’t match your childhood fantasies, it is still fulfilling if you have priorities.

From making appointments to driving to and from work, you can find meaning in every task. The fulfillment comes from having responsibilities that affect someone else, whether directly or indirectly. Think of the people you impact by following through on your daily commitments.

Even if someone else can do the same thing you do, you still did it. That means that you’re the one who made the difference in this situation. Each day as you fulfill your obligations and responsibilities, you bring more meaning to your life.

4 – You Made Sacrifices for Someone You Cared About

If you ever gave up on a dream, you might still wish you’d made it happen. However, even if you had to give up on something, you can still live a meaningful life today.

You might have had to give up a dream when you had children or got a steady job. Or, you might have had to let go of something you wanted to move to a new location with your spouse. Whatever didn’t go the way you’d dreamt, remember that it is all okay now.

If you have people worth making sacrifices, try to count your blessings. You only made sacrifices to promote the happiness, safety, and well-being of someone you cared about. Some common instances of making sacrifices for someone you cared about include:

Passing on your dream college to be with your high school sweetheart
Not moving for your dream job to care for your parents
Letting go of your wish to have pets because your partner is allergic
Traveling the world because you have children

While it’s easy to dwell on missing the chance or thinking you made the wrong choice, it’s essential that you shift your mindset. Shifting your mindset isn’t to say you should give up on your dreams to benefit others. Instead, it’s to say that it means you had deep, impactful relationships.

These decisions also helped shape your decision-making process while being considerate of others. These seemingly bad decisions show that you’re a good person, and you should never shame yourself for that.

Let it be enough that you have a good life now. Every decision you made led you to the people and places you’ve experienced along the way.

5 – You Couldn’t Control the Things That Went Wrong

When things don’t go how you wanted them to, you might regret the situation later on. However, don’t dwell on things that were beyond your control. If you know you can’t change things, it doesn’t reduce the meaning of your life.

Since the world isn’t perfect, things won’t always work out. Things not going as planned don’t mean that your life isn’t fulfilling. Release the thoughts of things you couldn’t control, and you’ll find the meaning you deserve.

6 – You Embrace Challenges if You Have a Meaningful Life

When you acknowledge something isn’t right for you, it’s time to change. Sometimes you might be afraid to delve in and face the challenge. However, if you can embrace the challenges and see the good in your situation, you live a meaningful life.

Challenges don’t have to be defeating. Instead, they can be the changes that make your life better. Making the most of each challenge can make all the difference. Plus, it helps you make decisions for your future, too.

Making the most of the challenges and using the tools you have right now show that you live a fulfilled life. Then, you can learn to make better choices for the future. These experiences bring meaning, strength, perspective, and wisdom to your life.

7 – You Try to Build Meaningful Routines

Routines enhance your ability to make good choices. When something is important to you, nurture those steps. If you don’t wait until you feel ready, you’ll feel more fulfilled. Jumping in and practicing routines can make all the difference.

Taking small steps can help build momentum, helping you see all that you can accomplish. Each time you fulfill the routine, you’ll experience happiness, grace, pleasure, and excellence. As long as you keep trying, you’ll realize how meaningful your life is.

Building routines also shows a healthy balance between enjoying life and doing meaningful things. It builds a solid foundation for happiness, allowing you to embrace your life. A meaningful life is all about working at it each day, not waiting for the big moments.

8 – You Can Identify the Source of Your Intense Emotions

Intense emotions are part of life, including negative emotions. It shows intelligence if you experience anger, sadness, embarrassment, jealousy, guilt, resentment, fear, or regret. Using these emotions as signals to build emotional processing skills shows that you have a meaningful life.

When you avoid overthinking these emotions, it helps you understand the underlying issue. Then, you can work on making things right. Being able to do this shows that you have a fulfilling life.

9 – A Meaningful Life Means You Value Your Time

Time is a resource that will eventually run out. If you think of time any other way, it can interfere with achieving your personal goals. However, if you value your time, it helps you prioritize your goals and face your problems.

10 – You Don’t Limit Yourself

If you don’t limit yourself to things you couldn’t do in the past, you’re doing well. It helps you let go of your failures as you implement better habits. Removing these limits indicates that you’re doing better than before, and that’s all that matters.

Final Thoughts on Living the Meaningful Life You Deserve

You’ve made it this far in life, and it says so much about you. The aspects of life that you often ignore show that you’re living the meaningful life you deserve. Regardless if life worked out the way you dreamed, you’ve still built a beautiful life.

Your life doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s to be meaningful. Embrace the people and things that mean the most, and focus on bettering yourself each day. You can find meaning everywhere, especially in the repetitive parts of your day.

11 Behaviors People Need to Stop Taking Things Personally

July 6, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

When you keep taking things personally, it can take a toll on your well-being. It can make you feel judged or questioned, even when the other person never meant to offend you. These negative thoughts can be emotionally draining.

Someone can ask a harmless question or make a statement that leaves you feeling upset. Likewise, you might feel like the person thinks less of you. Whatever thoughts run through your mind, it’s sure to make you feel like a victim.

Sometimes, you might even take it personally when someone is too busy to see you all the time. It can make you assume the worst, going so far as to think someone doesn’t like you. However, reflecting on your behavior can help you stop taking things personally.

You can adapt some behaviors that allow you to stop taking things personally. Adopting these behaviors helps you develop and grow while building your self-esteem simultaneously.

The Negative Thoughts That Cause Taking Things Personally

There are a few reasons people continually take things personally. The reasons vary for everyone, but some include:

Being insecure
Misinterpreting a conversation
Defensiveness
Feeling an attack on their character, abilities, or competence
Having their achievements diminished
Being disrespected or mistreated

While you can’t control what other people say and do, you can control how you react. Please don’t blame yourself or assume that you’re the reason for their behavior. Whether the things they say are true or untrue, you can choose to disregard or internalize them.

When you internalize, it leads to taking things personally. However, disregarding the words allows you to push away negativity and self-limiting beliefs.

Eleven Ways to Stop Taking Things Personally

Taking things personally can hinder your ability to pursue your goals or engage in your passions. Learning to let go helps you take control of your response, emotions, and energy level.

1. Create Some Space Before Taking Things Personally

When you feel offended, create some space before reacting. Allow yourself to calm down before returning to the situation. By doing so, you can prevent yourself from lashing out in anger, frustration, or pain.

While taking your space, reflect on the situation and see if you reacted negatively. You might realize that the other person wasn’t judging you or being condescending.

Additionally, remember that you don’t know everything about the situation. You don’t know what’s on the other person’s mind or what else they’re dealing with. Whether it’s about you or not, taking time before reacting can make a difference.

2. Focus on Self-Compassion

Self-compassion can help you stop taking things personally. When you’re hard on yourself, it’s easy to become offended by what someone else says.

However, you can choose not to take negative comments personally with self-compassion. It’ll help you stay positive even when another person is rude or insensitive.

When someone is rude to you, you can shift the situation. You can choose not to let it in, allowing you to take control of your emotions and mindset.

3. Change Your Self-Talk from Negative Thoughts to Positive

When you take someone’s statement personally, it often confirms a negative self-thought. The words trigger you because you already feel inferior in that area of life. If this is the case for you, it’s time to shift your mindset and adjust your self-talk.

Rather than think of yourself as messy, consider yourself creative. If you tell yourself you’re not a good cook, remember your other skills. While you can’t be good at everything, you can shift from negative thinking to positivity.

You can stop taking things personally by focusing on what you’re good at. Everyone has flaws and weaknesses, but you shouldn’t fixate on them.

4. Stay Busy

When you don’t have anything to do, it’s easy to let your mind wander to negative thoughts and emotions. This negativity often links to things other people said or about you. Instead of letting your thoughts get the best of you, find ways to stay busy.

Spend your time wisely, doing productive things you enjoy. It keeps you too busy to care what other people say and stops a cycle of negative thinking.

If you aren’t sure what to do to stay busy, think about what you enjoy doing. You can take a class, sign up for a club, or join a team. Or, you can do home-improvement projects to improve your environment while staying busy.

5. Question Your Negative Thoughts and Beliefs

If you greet someone and they don’t respond, you might think it’s because they don’t like you. However, you must question that thought because you don’t know if it’s true.

Instead, the person may not have seen you or didn’t have time to recognize you. Or, maybe they were lost in thought and didn’t even acknowledge that anyone greeted them. Your negative thoughts and beliefs lead to misinterpretation, causing you to take things personally.

6. Know Yourself and Your Worth

If you know yourself and your worth, it’ll boost your confidence. It helps you understand who you are, allowing you to ignore comments that say otherwise. Knowing yourself helps you push away negativity rather than taking it personally.

When you know your worth, it prevents you from believing what other people say about you. Even when they say something passive-aggressive, you’ll be resilient to their attempt to hurt you. Knowing your worth lays a solid foundation for what you need to stop taking things personally.

7. Don’t Reply with Negative Thoughts

When someone disrespects you, don’t respond in the same way. Avoid further toxicity and negativity because it’ll make you part of the problem. It might make you feel good momentarily, but it’ll make you feel bad later.

If you can remember to be mature and respond respectfully, it’ll help you stop taking things personally. You’ll feel better about who you are, too, boosting your confidence.

8. Accept That Not Everyone Will Like you, and It’s Okay

Everyone is different, and that means not everyone will like you. However, don’t take it personally because it’s not worth changing who you are. You can’t force everyone to like you, and you don’t need their approval.

Think about why you take it personally, and then focus on the root of the problem. If you want someone’s approval because you want everyone to like you, shift your mindset. You don’t need everyone to like you, and it’ll never happen anyway, so learn to be resilient when it happens.

Sometimes you’ll want someone to like you because they are a friend or family member of someone you care about. In this case, you must remember that their opinion of you doesn’t change who you are. Even if you’d enjoy their approval, you don’t need it, and you still know your self-worth.

Make an effort to stop caring what other people think about you. It’s not always easy, but you must stay true to yourself and let go of those who don’t embrace it.

9. Be Assertive But Kind

You can be kind while still being assertive. Many people believe that assertiveness is a way to be mean, but it’s not true. Instead, it means standing up for yourself or something you care about.

If someone says untrue things about you, being assertive can end it. Declare the lies and half-truths for what they are, and make it clear that you have boundaries. It helps you regain control of the situation and your response processes.

If you take things personally because you don’t get something you want or deserve. When this happens, it’s up to you to be assertive and ask for it.

Maybe you want your partner to stop bringing something up, but you haven’t asked them. You must speak up and let the other person know that their actions or words cause pain because they might not realize it.

10. Remember That It’s Not About You

When someone is insensitive and says harsh things, it’s often not about you. Sometimes a rude person might be having a bad day and takes it out on whoever they can. Or, they might struggle with self-esteem and confidence and feel better about themselves when they’re mean to others.

11. Ask for Clarification to Eliminate Taking Things Personally

If you know the person well enough, speak up and ask for clarification. When they say something upsetting, it’s best to ask what they meant or intended. You may have misinterpreted the situation, and giving them a chance to explain can prevent future issues.

Plus, asking for clarification prevents you from overthinking the situation later. You either get the answer you wanted or recognize a person you should eliminate from your life. The people in your life shouldn’t intentionally hurt you, so getting clarification can help.

Final Thoughts on the Behaviors That Help Someone to Stop Taking Things Personally

Taking things personally can negatively affect your confidence levels and sense of self-worth. It can also interfere with the progress you make toward your goals.

Rather than letting words bring you down, learn to stop taking things personally. Remember that it’s often not about you at all, and even when it is, it doesn’t change who you are. Let go of things that bring you down, and focus on all the good instead.

9 Ways to Manifest a Positive Change

July 6, 2022 by Sarah Barkley

Life is a blessing, but it can also be challenging sometimes. It’s easy to focus on negative thinking when things get hard, although it won’t help. Instead, find ways to manifest positive change in your life to improve the situation. How? By unlocking the Law of Attraction.

Manifesting positive change will improve your life in ways you never expected. You can quickly shift your mindset when you face challenges or experience negative thinking. With positive thoughts, anything is possible, and you’ll find fulfillment.

If you struggle to overcome negative thinking, making these changes in your life can make a difference. You don’t have to let negativity hold you back and hinder your happiness. Instead, make a positive change and live the life of your dreams.

Manifesting positive change in life takes dedication and persistence. You must develop new habits and avoid reverting to old habits. You can do it, though, and you’ll find the changes joyful.

What is Manifesting?

You’ll be happy to know you can manifest anything in life, including positivity and change. It takes commitment and self-discipline to stick to the positive changes. However, there will be no looking back once you realize how effective the differences are.

Manifesting is the process you use to bring your desires to reality. Your thoughts, dreams, and goals can become real if you display them with positive change. It involves the Law of Attraction that states “like attracts like,” so positivity brings beneficial change.

To attract good things into your life, you must have matching energy. Your energy must remain positive to reach your goals and accomplish your desires. Recognize that all good things come from within, and you won’t find them elsewhere.

How to Manifest Positive Change in Life

Staying positive is a choice; you can manifest positive change in your life daily. Learning how to choose each day will change your life and help you find happiness.

1. Visualize How You Want the Next Day to Play Out

Before going to bed each night, visualize how you want the next day to go. Think positively as you envision the next day, making it easier to make positive choices. Doing this before bed can help the thoughts and feelings solidify in your subconscious. Plus, falling asleep with a positive mindset allows you to wake up in the same state.

2. Use Positive Affirmations

Positive affirmations can help in all aspects of your life. Using them to manifest positive change can help you eliminate negative thinking and focus on good things instead. They help you develop a positive mindset, allowing you to attract everything you want and need.

If you come up with your affirmations, make sure they are:

In the present tense
Focused on positivity
Realistic

If you’d prefer to use pre-created affirmations, plenty are available online. You can repeat them exactly or alter them to fit your situation.

Use affirmations in the morning as you prepare for the day, allowing you to start on the right path. You can also use them at night to release negativity from the day and help you sleep better. Plus, using them throughout the day can help keep your mind focused on the good, even when things go wrong.

3. Practice Gratitude to Unlock the Law of Attraction

Gratitude can make every aspect of your life better. If you live with negative or anxious thoughts, think about the things that mean the most to you. Please don’t focus on what could go wrong or isn’t working out because it’ll cause you to think you’re lacking.

With gratitude, you’ll feel like anything is possible. Implement daily gratitude practices into your life, and you’ll feel better each time. Some of the ways you can practice thankfulness include:

Take a deep breath in and out while envisioning three things you’re grateful for
Keeping a gratitude journal near your bed for a daily list
Writing letters to people who have helped you

Focusing on gratitude allows you to attract more positivity into your life. Setbacks or obstacles will seem more accessible to overcome when you know that you have good things no matter what.

4. Implement a Morning Routine to Make Positive Change

A morning routine can be life-changing because it starts you out on a positive note. You get to choose how you want your day to go. Of course, that all starts with a good routine. A morning routine shows that you’re committed to making positive changes in your life and will encourage you throughout the day.

Without a routine, you might hit snooze a few times, unhappily drag yourself out of bed, and rush to get ready. This process is stressful, and it starts your day off negatively.

Instead, try getting up early, getting ready with minimal stress, and beginning your day on time. The positive change will improve your life because your days will be more positive. How you start your day can make a difference in manifesting positive change. It’ll keep your mindset positive and influence the rest of your day.

5. Avoid Negative Content When You Want to Make Positive Change

The things you fill your mind with affect every part of your life. If you constantly take in harmful content, you’ll acquire unhelpful thoughts. IF you want to manifest positive change in life, you must consume positive content instead.

If harmful content affects your life, consider doing the following to harness the Law of Attraction:

Listen to uplifting music
Follow positive social media accounts
Read inspiring books
Find positive news sources
Listen to positive podcasts
Turn off your electronics when harmful content seems constant

Sometimes, avoiding harmful content requires avoiding the news altogether. Delete the news apps from your phone, and limit your time on websites. Negative information can cause fear-based thinking and negativity, so it’s best to stop indulging in it.

6. Envision Positive Change on a Vision Board

A vision board gives you positive reminders of what you want in life. It helps you envision your dreams, allowing you to turn them into realistic goals. Vision boards help you attach emotion to your goals, giving you something to direct your energy on.

Vision boards are fun to create and help you think about what you truly want out of life. Once it’s on your board, you’ll be more likely to develop an operational plan that helps you get there. Plus, it allows you to push away negative thoughts because you’ll have your eye on the prize.

7. Find Something Positive in Every Situation

When things aren’t going as planned, it’s easy to focus on negativity. However, you’ll manifest positive change if you find something positive in these situations.

Staying positive allows you to look for options you wouldn’t have considered otherwise. Plus, it helps you keep an open mind as you work through the obstacles. You can find good aspects in any situation, even when hurt or devastated.

Making it a habit can make all the difference as it’ll help you remember that the world is still good. Finding the positive aspect doesn’t invalidate the situation but gives you enlightenment. If you can’t think of anything else, you can find a beneficial life lesson in the experience.

8. Go for Regular Walks Outside

Daily exercise is good for your mental and physical health and can help manifest positive change. Getting outside makes the experience even more beneficial. Researchers from UC Berkeley found that you’ll experience positive emotions when in the presence of natural beauty.

Further studies show that sunlight benefits your well-being in the following ways:

Improves brain function
Lowers blood pressure
Improves bone health
Lifts moderate depression

Make it a point to go on a 30-minute walk around your neighborhood daily. You can squeeze in a half-hour for walking even when you’re busy.

9. Take a Break from Social Media

You must exude positivity to benefit from the Law of Attraction.

Social media can zap your happiness and cause constant negativity. It can be highly detrimental with scary news articles, comparisons, and online drama. Pay attention to your mood when you use social media. You might find that you could benefit from a social media break.

Aside from a break, you can be more mindful of your social media usage. Set personal boundaries like limiting your time and monitoring who you follow. If specific pages or people make you feel bad, you don’t have to follow or interact with them.

Consider the apps you use, too. If one app brings more negativity than others, get rid of it. Likewise, if you spend too much time on a specific app, set a time limit on your phone. You will receive a notification when you’re getting close to your limit.

Another option is to set times of the day when you can’t use social media. You can choose not to use it during work, dinner, family time, or any time you think it creates negativity. Other beneficial times to avoid it is first thing in the morning and last thing at night.

Final Thoughts on Ways to Manifest Positive Change in Life

If you want to see improvement in your life, it’s time to manifest positive change. Create better habits by implementing some of these ways. You’ll experience increased positivity and happiness, and the Law of Attraction will take care of the rest. Start small by implementing one or two positive changes in your life. Gradually add more methods until you’re living the life of your dreams.

Weekly tips, affirmations, and small actions to feel your best.

Every day is a day to shine. Shine on!