“You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly.” – Sam Keen

The effects of giving and receiving love in a relationship can throw us some pretty big challenges in life. So colossal sometimes, that they can rarely be solved all at once.  No matter how big the challenge may be. However, the best way to succeed is through a series of small, measurable steps.

First and foremost, it’s important to remember that love always needs to be nurtured. It develops deeper and deeper as it is fostered by small, loving steps.  Authentic, lasting relationships are rarely created overnight. Love takes time.

Creating a successful relationship is a lot like building a home.  First, you inspect and familiarize yourself with the land and decide if it’s the right place to build.  When you’ve found the perfect spot,  it’s time to begin building a strong and sturdy foundation. Each brick,  slab of wood, wall, window, and ceiling are carefully placed with long term intention. Even after the home is built, there is specific care and maintenance that needs to be done for proper upkeep of the home. Without it, the interior and exterior start to break down.

That’s why the real secret to great love can be found in the loving small steps of your daily routine.  In fact, many of them are free, it just take conscious effort. Try a few of these regularly to see a boost in your relationships and love life.

21 Small Ways to Love big:

1. Give more hugs!

Studies show hugs release oxytocin that reduces stress, relieves pain, eases anxiety and boosts your immune system.  This is a simple, free action we can take every day to bring more love and wellness to our partner.

2. Give your partner more of your full attention, especially if they ask for it.

3. Complain less and compliment more.

4. Admit your mistakes.

5. Give a genuine “Thank You” more often.

Let daily gratitude for your partner flow naturally. Gratitude now creates more to be thankful for later.  Which will naturally create a more loving relationship.

6. Be open minded about his/her ideas.

7. Focus on their needs first.

8. Say “I Love You” a few times a day.

9. Laugh together.

10. Make their favorite meal.

11. Allow them to have their own space when they need it.

12. Send a random, love-filled text message or Facebook message.

13. Cuddle and/or have sex more.

Just like hugging, studies have found cuddling to create the same effect on the body. Studies also find that couples who have sex more often

14. Be honest.

15. Plan occasional weekend getaways. Plan them together unless your partner loves spontaneity, then randomly surprise them.

16. Be their biggest fan! Encourage them to do well and keep them going in the areas they want to see the most success. We can all benefit from outside support. Successful people always have huge support that has helped them along the way.

17. Hold hands any chance you get.

18. Listen and be more conscious. 

Pay attention to those little annoyances your partner asks you to be mindful of like putting the toilet seat down, picking up your clothes, putting dishes away, keeping your word, etc. Fine-tuning some of the daily little habits that can spark a big argument can really make a big difference.

19. Do a household chore that your partner usually does (pick one they don’t like for extra points).

20. Plan a random, romantic date.

21. Get them a small, thoughtful gift.

It could even be something they were saying they wish they had or needed to pick up (but haven’t yet).

BONUS: Be Generous. A study found that generosity between couples is a key element to their happiness.

Join the Conversation:
Do something that isn’t on the list? We’d like to hear about it . . .

What small thing do you and your partner do for each other regularly that has enhanced your relationship?