Whether we would like to admit it or not, we are all seeking to find true love that complements us perfectly. We desire to have someone by our side who shall love us when we are at our worst, and share the memories of our existence with us. The Notebook and other numerous love flicks have dominated the silver screen for decades. So, does true love exist?
Well, here’s the thing, the myth that love is a fairy tale, is just that; a myth. So, stop looking for that perfect ‘10’ that will check out in all the qualifications that you have in your wish list. Relationships are hard because people are not perfect. Love is about being comfortable with someone’s flaws, although this does not mean imperfections that are borderline criminal or need psychiatric intervention. You can still find true love, and it will be in someone that is willing to stand by you, through the messiness of our world, and help you enjoy life to your fullest potential.
So, how do you set the foundation that will help you find real love?
Here are eight things that you must do to find true love:
1. Be Authentic
You must first be true to yourself if you are ever going to find true love. If your dream is to find someone that will love you even through your moments of weakness, you must be ready to do that for them as well. Be true to yourself, so that you are prepared to appreciate somebody else’s authenticity.
What are the things that make you happy? What makes you mad? What are you looking for in life? You must be able to answer these questions if true love matters to you. Do not get caught up in the vicious cycle of pleasing others, or doing what is popular. Do not shift your purpose, passions, and personality just to accommodate another individual as you will be untrue to yourself. People admire authenticity and are attracted to it. Know yourself so you can love yourself.
2. Be the Best Version of You
Even though it is said that opposites attract, you also need to realize that ‘like attracts like.’ This means going out of your way to becoming the person that you would wish to attract. If you don’t want a complainer in your life? Then quit complaining. Are you attracted to someone who is fit and healthy? Start going to the gym. Do you want someone who lives with integrity? Start practicing it.
3. Be Confident
You have to be confident in your abilities and the person you are before you can attract the best kind of love in your life. This ties in with the second point. You first need to practice your ideals until they are part of you. That way, you shall be confident in your ability to attract true love as you know you are whole and complete.
4. Be Open
If you want to meet someone new, you must be willing to connect with those around you. This means being open and willing to engage with people who desire to talk to you. This openness will allow you to meet a lot of people, and who knows, the love of your life might be among them.
5. Be Happy
Everyone loves happy people. Focus on doing things that make you happy. Happiness is magnetic.
6. Know Your Boundaries
You must know your deal breakers. What are the things you cannot accommodate? Is it excessive drinking? Drug abuse? Financial instability? Verbal or emotional abuse? You must know what your non-starters are before you get into any emotional involvement.
Once you have identified your deal breakers, you must follow through with them. Do not compromise because you are afraid to lose that other person, doing this will only lead to losing yourself.
7. Limit Your Requirements
Stop looking for everything you desire in one person. There isn’t such a person. This goes hand in hand with being authentic. Understand there’s no perfect individual, so do not waste your life chasing a fantasy.
8. Accept Who they Are
If you are in the quest for true love, you must accept and be comfortable with the personal life of your significant other. To be in love with a person means being comfortable with every aspect of their being, including their quirks. They might be doing everything right, but they just love sleeping with their socks. And even though you found this habit strange at first, you will find it amusing once you accept their personality.
The quest to find genuine love is one that many people have undertaken, but only a small percentage has achieved. This is because when most people are looking for true love, they often look outwards instead of inwards. Thus, they have expectations of what their ideal partner is supposed to be, without looking at whether they have ideal qualities themselves. Work on yourself, become the best version of you and be open to anything while not accepting anything less than you have to offer. Also, be okay and proud of who you are, it is the most important thing.