‘If you look around every corner, there’s always that nagging reminder that you could do better because you’re not good enough. Seeing all these negative images can leave your confidence at dismal levels. However, the self-confident woman isn’t swayed by what she sees or hears, as she has assurance.

It’s easy to be tilted towards negativity when you open social media. There’s always someone with more money, more time with loved ones, and those who seem to be born with a silver spoon in their mouth. It’s no wonder many people struggle with self-image, as the constant comparisons weigh heavily on your psyche.

Thankfully, you can rise above all the things that swirl around you, as you must remember that much of what you see isn’t true. An old saying was used years ago that says someone was “putting on the dog.” It simply means that you’re trying to be something you’re not.


People on social media only let you see a glimpse of their lives, and if you saw what went on behind closed doors, you might not be so envious.

NOTE: Men can also have a healthy degree of confidence. But because males display it differently, we cover them in a separate article.

Self-Confident Women Aren’t Impressed by These Twelve Things

Someone who displays confidence doesn’t care what car their neighbor drives or their social status. They’re independent and career driven, so they are busy with what’s happening in their life. The self-confident woman is a force to be reckoned with, as she knows what she wants and goes after it.

If you’re trying to impress this fantastic lady, you might want to use diverse tactics. What will make some girls turn their heads won’t work for her. Here are some things that won’t impress that lady with a great self-image.

self-confident women

1. Self-Confident Women Do Not Play the Blame Game

One thing a self-confident lady despises is someone who’s always pointing fingers at others. If you’ve done something wrong, she expects you to admit fault. She’s not afraid to say when she’s made a mistake, which is why many people admire her tenacity.

If you don’t have enough confidence to admit when you’re wrong and learn and grow from it, this woman isn’t going to put you in her inner circle.

2. Pleasing Everyone Else

Independence comes from being free from the opinions and beliefs of others. A highly confident woman doesn’t live her life to please someone else. She wants to make herself happy, so she knows she might offend a few.

Being true to herself is at the top of the list, so she doesn’t want you to be a person who is always trying to maintain your status. Nothing will push her away further than a person who lives to be in the limelight and rides on the significance of pleasing people.

3. Self-Confident Women Do Not Compare Themselves with Others

Having a high confidence level means you don’t compare yourself with others. She doesn’t care what degree you have or how much money is in your bank account. She works hard in her career and doesn’t have time for such petty games. She’ll walk the other way if you’re name-dropping and constantly flaunting your wealth.

4. Making Fun of Others

A self-confident woman would never put someone else down to make herself feel better. Additionally, she doesn’t like to see other people struggling and going through hard times, as it doesn’t make her feel like more of a winner.

She loves to help others and will lift them when they’ve fallen. So, if you want to impress her, you won’t put others down in her presence. She sees it as distasteful and shallow.

5. Self-Confident Women Do Not Overthink Things

Overthinking is constantly meditating on things. The person continually overthinks and picks apart every piece of an issue until it consumes them. While you may be prone to overthinking, it will be off-putting to the confident woman.

She doesn’t like people who can’t make decisions and overanalyze everything to the point of madness. She wants you to make the best choices and let the chips fall where they may. Overthinking can be crippling, as it often coincides with an anxiety disorder.

According to an article by Concordia University, this is a common problem. Thankfully, you can overcome it. They suggest using the acronym R.A.I.N.

R – Recognize that your anxiety is getting the best of you.

A – Accept and acknowledge your feelings.

I – Investigate and uncover where these feelings are coming from, so you can stop them.

N – Non-Identify means to realize that this is probably coming from anxiety, and you can’t let fear dictate your need to make decisions.

6. People Who Are Afraid of Vulnerability

Just because she’s self-confident and driven doesn’t mean she’s afraid to show her emotions. She wants you to be honest with her, and it’s okay for a man to cry in her presence. While you might see it as a weakness, she sees it as a strength. Showing your vulnerability with a self-confident woman is never a bad thing.

self-confident women

7. Avoiding Hard Things

Some folks will walk a mile away to avoid doing something challenging. Confident people know they don’t like doing those things, but they push themselves because they know life isn’t always easy. They have enough faith in themselves to know that even though the task is challenging, they can do anything they want.

Having confidence like these ladies means you won’t back down from things that build character. She will appreciate that quality in you.

8. External Validation

People constantly seeking external validation is a big turnoff to a self-confident woman. Folks who look to others to feel validated are dangerous. She likes people to be aware of their strengths and weaknesses, and she wants her inner circle to be folks who keep it real.

Just because she has strength doesn’t mean that she keeps up with trends, and she never bases her self-worth on the opinion of others. If you want her to turn away from you, then constantly needing validation from her and others is the way to do it.

9. Self-Confident Women Do Not Expect Perfection

Her independence has cost her greatly, as she’s fallen many times during the learning process. Perfection is more of a state of mind. Sure, she’s a high achiever who likes to get things right, but she knows she’s not perfect.

She doesn’t want anyone coming around her with demands for perfectionism, as she knows this mindset is about control. She has realistic expectations for herself and others and expects you to do the same.

10. Compromising Boundaries

Part of having confidence means having boundaries and staying grounded. The self-reliant woman is strong and knows when to say “no” to others. She doesn’t give in to peer pressure to act or live in a certain way, as she’s aware that she only needs to please and be happy for herself.

11. Playing Games

The self-confident woman doesn’t like to play games. She doesn’t need anyone in her life who manipulates her with their toxic narcissism. Another thing she despises is someone that brags about being so much better than others, as she sees everyone as equals.

Confidence allows a person to be proud without bragging, and she doesn’t have time for the manipulative game player.

12. Self-Confident Women Do Not Use the Victim Card

Many people have been through horrific things in life. However, you must learn to rise above those things and help others. When someone plays the victim card, it’s a big turnoff to someone who overcame many obstacles.

The self-confident lady has weathered her share of storms in life, but she doesn’t use her trials as a crutch. She doesn’t blame shift, is confident enough to admit when she’s wrong, and never sees herself as a victim. According to an article published on the Master’s Seminary, there’s a certain allure to using a victim mentality.

People who see themselves as victims get special treatment as people feel sorry for them. They think it gives them a right to complain about their life, and people will listen empathetically. Lastly, being a victim gives people a sense of belonging.

The confident woman might be a “victim,” but she will never use that to get ahead. She cries on her pillow at night and gets up for work the following day. Her silent strength and resilience are what power her for greatness.

self-confident women

Final Thoughts on Impressing the Self-Confident Women

Ladies with confidence on the inside possess quiet strength and resilience that power them for greatness. She doesn’t have time to gossip or put others down, as she’s too busy to worry about what others are doing.

She’s a great person to have as a friend or a lover, as she’s grounded and has good self-esteem. Having this independent woman in your life is a blessing, as she’s what most people aspire to be.