Strength is often considered to be something strictly physical. But it doesn’t have to be strictly related to your muscles’ size. Quiet strength has nothing to do with the physical aspect; instead, it is about dealing with challenges with quiet and calm. So even though men may want to appear strong, this definition of strength is still misleading. And it can make men feel bad about themselves and their self-worth.
Even when strength is not defined as strictly physical, it only encompasses certain stereotypically masculine traits. For example, being assertive and bossy are qualities often associated with strength. But these are not qualities that all men have, nor should they. And they are not the only qualities that indicate a man’s strength.
Unfortunately, we live in a society filled with stereotypes and assumptions about people. And while women tend to get the brunt of it, men are also often mischaracterized. And, if they don’t measure up to arbitrary standards, they will be considered weak. This might not seem like such a big deal, but it’s one of the worst insults you can direct toward a man.
It implies that you think he is unfit and doesn’t live up to the expectations that were imposed on him. But unfortunately, we still live in a society where men are expected to provide and work their hardest to reach top positions. And, if that doesn’t happen, they are looked down on. But, as a society, we should start appreciating the quiet strength that men are capable of, as opposed to the male stereotypes.
NOTE: We cover the signs of women of quiet strength in a companion article because females display slightly different behaviors.
6 Signs of a Man with Quiet Strength
1. Strength in a Man is Calm
Men are expected to be firecrackers and assert their will wherever they go. But, more often than not, this attitude isn’t natural. For most men, it comes from a sense of obligation. Men fake being assertive because they are afraid of being judged otherwise. For example, it’s expected of a man CEO to manage the company using fear and to keep employees on a tight leash.
But it’s seen as a weakness to do the same job by being calm and understanding. So, unfortunately, a calm man will be considered weak. Not to mention that it can be hard to stay calm, considering how hectic the world is. However, calmness should never be considered a weakness. On the contrary, it’s a sign of quiet strength. As a man, to be able to ignore all societal pressure and stay calm during conflict is remarkable.
If a man does that, he can put what’s morally right above his image. Even if others tell him he can’t cut it, he’ll stay true to himself. And in fact, being calm is a much better way to handle conflict and manage different situations than always being up for a fight. Strength comes from knowing that it’s better to back off sometimes.
2. He is Self-Confident
Confidence isn’t necessarily a trait you wouldn’t have expected to be listed. But it’s essential to remember that we’re specifically talking about the kind of confidence that isn’t arrogant. Many men can be raised with the idea that they are destined to change the world. When they are little, they play with toy trucks and tools, indicating that they are meant to innovate and build.
And, of course, parents want their kids to believe they are meant for great things. The problem is this environment usually makes boys think they are better than everyone else. Sometimes, this even has a misogynistic angle, as boys grow up to believe they are better than girls. Because of this, men can become arrogant instead of learning to be confident.
They blindly believe they are the best since sliced bread without a reason to believe it. A self-confident man has faith in his abilities and knowledge. But he doesn’t need to prove that to anyone. His quiet strength comes from knowing just how good he is, so he doesn’t need validation from anyone.
3. Strength is Modest
Modesty is a quality that could often be misinterpreted as a weakness. For example, when a man doesn’t parade his accomplishments around, people tend to believe that it’s because he has nothing to be proud of. But this misconception only makes people feel the need to be arrogant, as we discussed previously.
To avoid being considered weak, many men put up a façade and forget about being modest. But modesty is one of the biggest signs of strength out there. Sure, on the outside, it might not look like it. A modest person doesn’t boast or show off in any way. They might seem like the blandest person ever.
But, being able to keep to yourself and stay humble when society almost forces you to be arrogant to succeed is a sign of quiet strength. It shows that he cares more about being true to himself than how others perceive him. Because when push comes to shove, he knows that modesty is a sign of integrity and a quality that will help him when it matters most.
4. He is Empathetic
Society is harsh, and people often need to be individualistic. This is especially true for men, who are expected to only look out for themselves, even at the expense of others. Not to mention that empathy is a quality that’s traditionally considered feminine. Women are expected to help others and have a high emotional intelligence.
But, when men display empathy, they are automatically considered weak. For example, many men get weird looks when taking their kids to the park. That’s because they aren’t expected to be emotionally mature. Instead, many people picture dads as having a distant, cold role. And a man who decides to be warm and present is considered weak and weird.
Many other examples support this idea. But it’s enough to understand that empathy is not usually associated with a strong man. This is a big misconception, as empathy signifies quiet strength. An empathetic man understands the need to be kind and help people in need, even if they get nothing out of it.
Even when it comes to the workplace, empathy is still vital. Understanding why people think and feel the way they do is the key to creating strong connections, which can help you in all areas of life.
5. He Shows His Emotions
One of the men’s biggest issues is their inability to reveal their true emotions. Men are expected to be angry, annoyed, or emotionless, but that’s about it. But society doesn’t allow them to express themselves in any other way. So, they are told to get over it whenever a man is going through something and is affected.
Responses like these make men shut the world off and distance themselves from people. This seemingly stoic attitude is, unfortunately, considered a good thing. If a woman isolates herself, her friends and family will immediately become worried. But, when a man does the same, he is seen as quiet, strong, and independent. All these societal factors make it so that men have the highest rates of mental health disorders.
So, when a man can show his emotions, that’s a true sign of quiet strength. It shows that he has healed from all these negative societal expectations and learned to focus on himself. Even though he risks being judged, he’ll still do what’s best for him. He knows bottling things up is the worst decision they can make in the long run.
6. Strength is Balanced
Being ambitious and focused on work is vital in everyone’s life. But men are taught from a young age that they should value nothing more than their professional achievements. So if a man doesn’t spend all his time at the office, he’ll probably be considered weak and distracted. But life isn’t all about work.
And true strength comes from understanding that you need to relax and focus on other aspects of life as much as you need to work. So, a man who understands the importance of balance is a man who displays quiet strength.
Women will never be judged for caring for themselves and finding hobbies outside work. But the moment a man uses a face mask or starts to crochet as a hobby, he will immediately be labeled weak. For him, it can be hard to turn a blind eye to the critics and focus on himself.
So, if he does, that shows he is too interested in his well-being to risk listening to outdated, mean opinions. Having a balanced lifestyle also means he can focus on what’s truly important to him. If he puts family first, this balanced lifestyle will allow him to spend time with the ones he loves. But, if he wants to invest fully in his career, he can do that too.
Final Thoughts on Some Signs of a Man with Quiet Strength
For a man to be considered traditionally strong, he needs to be assertive, brave, and outspoken. Of course, it also helps if he is physically strong. But that’s demeaning to men, especially the ones who don’t fit in this traditional box. Not to mention that people don’t understand that strength doesn’t need to be displayed obnoxiously.
Most people have a quiet strength that isn’t easily noticeable if you don’t look closely. Most qualities that make a man strong are things people usually associate with weakness. But it’s important to understand that nothing is stronger than an empathetic man who understands his and others’ emotions. Plus, being calm shows that you can face pressure while staying respectful and not adding fuel to the fire.
Being self-confident is also a sign, as long as he is modest. No one likes an arrogant man, nor is such a man truly strong. Lastly, being balanced shows that he can organize his life to ensure he can do everything he wants. If he wants to stay home in a calm environment and relax, he’ll do that. If he wants to work, that’s what he’ll do. And he won’t be interested in impressing or convincing anyone of his qualities.