Why is it that older men love dating younger women, and many people don’t think much about it? It doesn’t require any research to realize that they love someone who makes them feel young at heart. However, why is it that the younger women who love to date older guys are often stereotyped?
While the research we cite specifically deals with younger women-older gentlemen attraction, some could argue that younger men-older women relationships flourish, as well. However, we will leave the second topic to a separate blog post!
Attraction to an Older Man
Some say that these younger women have daddy issues when they want someone older, but that’s not always the case. Others say they are just interested in money. You must put stereotypes aside and realize that some women love the senior guy because of his maturity.
They also crave the worldly wisdom they’ve obtained as well as the financial stability they’ve acquired. Keep in mind that financial stability doesn’t always mean wealth. It just means that they’ve made their blunders at a young age and have already learned the hard financial lessons.
Society tends to accept a small age gap, which is anywhere from 5-10 years difference. However, what about the women that date men that are old enough to be their fathers? Is there a limit on age restrictions, and how do you know if the age gap is too much for a relationship?
There are both evolutionary and social motives behind a woman wanting an older man. Irrespective of the motive, both parties will have to overcome much stigma and many stereotypes to be together.
Many people will stop and gawk when they see an older man holding hands or kissing a younger woman in public. It has to do with cultural norms and what society expects. People passing have no clue about this couple, yet they are ready to make snap judgments on what they see.
Many studies have been conducted on these types of relationships, and science has come up with a few answers.
The Apparent Unfair Benefit of Age
In 2018, a study examined why there are so much prejudice and stereotypes when people are involved in age gap relationships. The bias rate was much higher in a relationship where the woman was younger and the man much older.
Many think that the man has the upper hand in these unions, which equals relational inequity. Older men that enter a relationship with younger women are often called “cradle robbers,” but the women are called “gold diggers,” both of which are derogatory terms.
Other women see the younger lady with an older gentleman, and they perceive that they want a comfortable lifestyle that money and this guy can offer. In other cases, they may insist that it’s the connections and resources they wish to gain to help further their career or obtain a certain social status in life.
Not all relationships are about money or influence. In fact, many people are together because they love each other and nothing else. True love doesn’t look at the chronological age and see any difference as it’s more focused on the heart.
Interpersonal Connection and Age
In 2016, a study was done on why some women wanted the older man as a partner. When the age gap is more than ten years, people think it’s an unhealthy relationship with the father. This study wanted to prove or discredit this theory, and they found that it’s not a fair stereotype because there’s no truth in these claims.
Of the 173 participants in this study, 44 were dating men at least a decade older than themselves. Most of these women had good relationships with their fathers and did not need to seek solace or a father/daughter relationship with an older man.
About 75 percent of the women said that they weren’t looking for a father figure, but they preferred the company of an older man to make them feel secure. If the father had been a great role model for the younger woman in life, then the maturity level they observed growing up brings them comfort in their relationship.
Younger Women Want Pleasant, and Strong Relationships–Regardless of Age
A couple with any sort of age difference can enjoy a healthy, satisfying, and loving relationship. Regardless of whether there are ulterior motives or one of the parties suffers from past childhood issues, many have strong unions that can stand up against the scrutiny of society.
Sure, there are couples where a younger woman wants to date the older man due to ulterior motives or because they are looking for a marriage of convenience. However, it’s unfair to lump all relationships with age gaps in this category. More often than not, people come together because they love each other.
Five Reasons Why Younger Women Like Older Men
It’s easy to see that many women who like older men often do it out of love and not selfish motives. However, what are the reasons why these women prefer someone with a significant age gap between them? Here are the top five reasons why the older man is more appealing.
It’s assumed that younger women are still in their childbearing years. When looking for someone to be the father of a child, you would want someone who ages well, is financially secure, and has his life together. It sure makes it easier than being with someone young who has nothing to offer.
They need to feel secure is one of the biggest reasons for the attraction to an older man, though it’s not about how much is in the bank.
2. Older Men Have Confidence
An older gentleman has already been through many storms in life and has developed an aura of confidence. They have a great deal of experience and are wise beyond their years. To the young lady who has much to experience in life, it can make things better to be with someone who is well seasoned.
It’s hard when you are younger and worry about money. Though the older man may not have great wealth, they probably have a home and a car, which is quite appealing to someone just starting in life. It takes time to really build your career to be able to afford such things.
3. They Know How To Treat A Lady
Perhaps one of the most appealing things about the older gentlemen is that they know how to treat a lady. Going back even two decades ago, men still opened the doors for the women and treated her like a queen. The older generation lived in vastly different times.
Sure, they expect a meal on the table when they get home from work, but they have no problem pampering their princess. The guys these days have a different set of morals and values that is nothing like those born before 1980. A few men show that chivalry is still alive, but it’s very few who practice it.
4. Older Men Are Interested in the Mind Too
These days, people become intimate on the first date. Unless you have something that goes beyond those one-night stands, the relationship may fizzle. Women love intimacy just as much as men, but they want someone interested in their minds too.
The older man enjoys good conversation and companionship. While they are interested in a sensual relationship, they are more about finding someone they enjoy talking to over coffee and bonding.
5. They’ve Got Style
What happened to the days when men knew how to dress like a man? Few women find it attractive when males have their pants hanging two inches below their underwear or holes all in their clothes. Some of the styles of yesteryear should make a comeback as they rival any trend of today.
The older man knows how to dress down for a day at the park or a beach, but they also know how to get all fancy for a night on the town. If younger women want the feeling of being a princess, she wants someone who will be her equivalent of a prince.
True love isn’t about age, skin color, wealth, or religion. It’s about a mental, physical, and spiritual connection between two people that conquers all obstacles in their way. Who are we to judge these couples?
When it comes to love, variety is the spice of life. One woman may prefer a man in his 50s who loves animals. The next lady may want someone in their 70s with a big bank account that can spoil her. There are all sorts of reasons why people fall in love. But society likes to typecast the traditional relationship and judge those that don’t fit into that mold.
If you are lucky enough to find someone in this life that makes you feel better about yourself, gives you a reason to smile, and holds your hand through the darkest days, then you have found a treasure that is far greater than any labels society may give you. While many younger women love men, most do it for the right reasons with no ulterior motives. After all, true love is timeless.