Most crushes begin with physical attraction. While this will sustain you initially, it takes much more than looks to keep you together for the long haul. There must be an emotional attraction that helps bridge the gap when the good looks and beauty fade away. But women who choose emotionally intelligent men stay attracted to their partners.
A couple grows emotionally to progress their relationship. While mutual interest and a hot body get things started, they certainly won’t keep the fires burning after a while. What do women look for in emotionally intelligent men, and how does this factor into one’s decision to enter a long-term relationship?
Why Emotionally Intelligent Men Are the Most Attractive
It would be nice if there were a magic formula that figured the emotional compatibility of a couple, but alas, there’s no such thing. So, you need to follow signs that a man is emotionally intelligent before you commit. Here are a few things to consider.
1. He Honors His Word
When someone tells you they’re going to do something, you expect it to be the way they say. Emotionally intelligent men who keep their promises are a man of their word. In fact, you learn to trust them so much that when they tell you something, you can take it to the bank.
In the writings of Steven R. Covey’s book Seven Habits of Highly Effective People®, he talks about the importance of putting things into the bank of trust. Each time a man follows through, it adds to this account. However, each time he lets you down, it reduces the balance. Those with a higher bank account balance are more attractive than overdrawn and constantly in the red.
2. Emotionally Intelligent Men Exhibit Unwavering Confidence
Having limiting beliefs can hold you back in life. When a man struggles with self-confidence, their body language will show it. However, emotionally intelligent men stand up straight and keep their heads high.
They will look you right in the eye when speaking, and they are comfortable in their skin. Without attraction, curiosity, and chemistry, you would end up in the friendzone. However, this guy knows how to show his lady just what he wants and is not afraid to go after it.
3. He Has No Qualms About Telling You No
Did you know that as a human, you crave boundaries? Perhaps it’s why so many people are attracted to those that play hard to get. Women like it when a guy is challenging and doesn’t give them everything they want.
While bending over backward to make you happy is excellent for relationships, the pleasing tendencies soon get old. Emotionally intelligent people don’t care to tell you no, and you don’t mind that he’s in control and sets limits for himself.
4. When You’re with Them, the Phone Is Out of Sight
Is there anything more annoying than a phone that’s buzzing and ringing during dinner? How can you have a conversation when someone is constantly on their phone. While the World Wide Web is necessary, it’s nice to have a guy that knows when to turn it off.
Women love emotionally intelligent guys because they will turn off their phones and be concerned with them while spending time together.
5. He Remembers the Smallest Details About You
Women are great at remembering the little details, but it’s even more attractive when a man has this keen eye. If they remember the way you smell, how your hair was fixed, or the clothes you’re wearing, they’re very observant. A man who pays attention to all these small things is in touch with their emotional side.
6. Emotionally Intelligent Men Will Give You the Space You Need
No one wants a partner who is clingy and needy all the time. A woman likes someone who will give her the space she needs when she needs it. When a man is confident enough within himself to let you be alone and not worry whether you’re cheating, it signals self-security.
7. He’s a Tender Defender
You’re probably wondering what the term tender defender means. A strong man who is also in touch with his gentle side is someone you want to keep. They’re not afraid of being caring and nurturing to those closest to them, but they will also step into a leadership or defensive role if they need to.
8. Emotionally Intelligent Men Do Not Engage in Gossip
This guy’s sensitivities let him know that listening to other people’s problems is okay, but he would never dream of repeating them. Plus, he isn’t engaging in gossip as he doesn’t have time for this foolishness. Additionally, there’s an aura of suspicion and distrust with the man who eagerly joins in the bashing of others.
9. His Style is Impeccable
A guy who knows how to dress is certainly eye candy, but it goes beyond their clothes. A man who has style doesn’t forget clean fingernails, quaffed facial hair, and staying fit. They’ve got it together both physically and emotionally.
According to an article by Inspire, you will know a person’s inner beauty by looking at the outside. True beauty radiates from the inside out as it shines from the heart. A man who cares enough to make sure his exterior is put together probably has the inside in good shape too.
10. Emotionally Intelligent Men Exhibit Patience
Life is flawed, and there’s not a perfect person alive. Still, the emotionally intelligent man knows that he must be patient and longsuffering when it comes to his woman. He must also learn to read between the lines when hormonal surges take over her sensitivity, and his lady doesn’t make good sense.
11. He Values Confidentiality
You want a man to share your deepest and darkest secrets with, and you expect them to keep these secrets to themselves. If a man should tell your stories, he’s betraying your trust and not in touch with his emotional side. To make a relationship work, you must be able to respect not only the privacy of one another but also those secrets you keep.
12. He’s Congruent with Thoughts, Words, and Actions
Emotionally intelligent men say what they mean and mean what they say. They’re honest, a good listener, and sensitive enough to have those tough conversations. Additionally, he lets his intentions be known.
13. He’s Great at Communication
Men don’t always know what’s happening inside that head of yours, but that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care about your thoughts or feelings. Communication is one of the foundational building stones of a relationship, and having a good listener is essential. While the man has emotional intelligence, he needs you to tell him what you want and not assume anything.
14. Emotionally Intelligent Men Are Not Afraid to Speak Their Minds
Men who can speak their minds regardless of what the world thinks are endearing. They’re not trying to win the approval of others, but they’re being true to themselves. Women find this quality in a man highly desirable.