Therapists Explain 10 Ways to Build an Emotional Connection

Therapists Explain 10 Ways to Build an Emotional Connection

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Everyone wants their relationships to be full of happiness, warmth, affection, and depth. When you learn an effective way to build an emotional connection, it can help you feel a deeper relationship with your loved ones. This is important for your spouse, children, parents, and anyone else you’re lucky enough to call family.

Understanding the emotional connection is not so easy, as it means different things to each of you. However, some generalities give this term common ground. When you have a relationship with someone, feelings allow this bond to form.

According to an article published by Everyday Health’s Isabella Gladd, this bond comes with emotional attachments that can secure the relationship. When there is no strong connection between two people, the relationship won’t last long or sustain the shifting winds of life. Having a bond with one another is so much more than just feeling a connection, as there must be ties and deep roots that emotionally bind you.

The connection does not appear between two people, as it takes time to cultivate and develop roots. Think of planting a new flower in the springtime. You often start these inside or from a seedling and transplant them to the earth.

If the flower is healthy, it will take root and begin to grow and flourish. However, how many times have you planted a flower only to see it wither away and die? You don’t know what you did wrong because you water it, and it was just as strong as the other seedlings who made it.

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The difference is that this flower didn’t take root. For whatever reason, the plant didn’t grow and mature. Use this analogy to think of emotional connections. Many relationships are surface with no real depth, but to get the depth you want in your connection, it must take root.

Ten Ways to Build Emotional Connection with Loved Ones

emotional connection
An emotional tie allows you to create a secure bond, and it’s a connection that makes you feel safe emotionally. Additionally, having strong relationships allows you to have an increase in both your self-worth and your self-esteem. Teresa Maples-Zuvela is a renowned therapist that deals with relationship issues.

She suggests that it automatically improves the connection between the two of you when you develop a bond in your relationship. Conversely, this is the tie necessary to sustain marriages and improve on what you currently have going. Why do some married couples make it twenty years when others only make it 2 years?

The difference is the foundation and the emotional ties between the couple. The ones who make it for the long haul are deeply rooted and able to sustain life’s storms, but the others don’t have a deep enough connection emotionally to weather the turbulent weather. Here are some easy ways to help you build that emotional connection your relationships need.

1. Accept Them for Who They Are

Why do people always get together and try to change one another? You must love each other for who and what you are in this life. Remember, a tiger cannot change its stripes, so your loved one will not change their ways.

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You’ll only disappoint yourself and the other party if you’re constantly trying to change them into something or someone you consider perfect. Part of establishing a connection emotionally is accepting the person as is.

2. See Things from Their Perspective

Everyone has a point of view. Your way of viewing things isn’t going to be the same as someone else. You must be open and understanding enough to see things from their side. If you’re so closed-minded that you don’t allow other opinions and perspectives, you will have difficulty developing deep connections with folks.

3. Trust Them

Have you ever seen the game where someone tells you to fall back into their arms and asks if you trust them? The point of this exercise is to see how much trust you have for one another. If you were to fall backward and not trust them, you might end up on the ground hurting.

You must trust your partner or loved one 100 percent. There can be no doubts when you’re trying to establish connections emotionally. Any doubt that seeps into the relationship can cause the foundation to become shaky.

4. Communicate Often

How well would your relationship with your boss be if you didn’t communicate? You must share to ensure that you stay connected. Communication unlocks the doors to the heart, allowing you to step inside the mind of others.

You understand one another when you communicate about your feelings, dreams, goals, and desires.

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5. Never Judge or Criticize Their Actions or Behaviors

While this person may not act or say what you would, you should never judge them. When you criticize one another, you don’t build a bond but destroy it. If your partner feels that you will be critical of their thoughts or feelings, they will start being dishonest to avoid scrutiny.

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6. Be Honest

Don’t lie, even if it’s a white, tiny mistruth. Mirel Goldstein is a renowned therapist from Clifton, New Jersey. She deals with couples counseling and blogs about her experiences to help others. She brings an interesting point in one of her writings.

Goldstein states that many people are stuck in “pretend mode” because they don’t believe reality is relevant. It’s often the case that the lack of acceptance allows two people to see things differently. Before you jump to conclusions that your loved one is lying, you need to make sure that you communicate to understand their perspectives.

Sometimes, it’s just a blatant lie that needs no explanation. These are the situations that you want to avoid.

7. Dream with Them

Do you remember as a child laying down and looking at the night sky and all the stars? Legend says that if you wish on a falling star, whatever you want will come true. There’s nothing like the peaceful calm of nature to set the stage for dreaming.

These are the experiences that bond you with your loved one. Forming an emotional connection while dreaming is a powerful way to link you. If your dreams are going in the same direction, it even further solidifies the relationship.

8. Argue Smartly

Choose your battles wisely, and don’t be so eager to jump to conclusions. It’s okay to argue and have beneficial disagreements because if you agree all the time, then it’s certainly not healthy. However, it would help if you did not quarrel about every little thing.

Inspiration to your Inbox

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When everything you say or do becomes an argument, you will quickly shut down to avoid contention.

9. Plan Adventures

While you’re dreaming and making plans, you need to include some adventures and vacations. Life cannot be all about work and no play. You need time to feel free from the restrictions of your life and career and to be able to let your hair down.

Did you know that some countries mandate vacation time for the sake of the citizens’ mental health? According to The Travel Channel, Brazil is listed at the top, giving their residents thirty days’ annually. Vacation helps to reset the mind, and it lowers stress levels and gives people more time for their families.

10. Spend Quality Time Together

While it’s nice to plan adventures and to travel the world, you need to have quality time that works within your schedules. It’s not feasible to be globe-setting around the world all the time, and your funds may not permit it. Never underestimate the power of date night.

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Having a set time and day that you spend time together is valuable. Who says that after you’ve been married or in a relationship long term that you can’t still date one another? In fact, it’s probably wise that you do date one another so that you can maintain the connection you developed when you first got together.

Keeping the magic alive means being together. What’s essential about these dates is that you experience new things, communicate with one another, and continue to work on your emotional bond.

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Final Thoughts on Building an Emotional Connection

While building an emotional connection won’t happen overnight, it’s not something that can be rushed. You want to take time and establish the bond naturally and not force anything. Some people say when they meet, it’s kismet and everything seems to flow together naturally.

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While others say that the connection didn’t happen till much later in the relationship, doing things like spending quality time together, going on adventures, dreaming, being honest, and accepting them for who they are is all helpful in solidifying this link. Whether it’s a partner or a parent, you need to learn how to accept them and not try to change them.

If someone feels that they don’t meet your standards or that you constantly want them to evolve into someone else, then they won’t trust you with their innermost secrets. In fact, it will open the door to dishonesty and a lack of communication. Now, you can take the knowledge you learned here and help to develop the emotional connections you desire.

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Deborah is a full-time editor, blogger, and children's book author. Her book series helps children with anxiety overcome the challenges in everyday life using kindness and courage. She holds a Bachelor's of Science degree in Secondary Education English and a Spanish minor from the Edinboro University of Pennsylvania. When she's not working on one of her many writing projects, you will find Deborah working in her herb garden. She is currently completing her master herbalist certification and can't wait to share the knowledge.

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