Your relationship is not perfect and you’ve been wondering if the grass is possibly greener elsewhere, so should you end it? If you haven’t come to a decision about whether or not to break up with your partner, we have a little advice for you.
It is always easier to break something than to fix what is broken, but you don’t throw away a car because it has a broken window; you pay to get it fixed. The same is true of a relationship.
When a relationship ends, there is a period of time where we need to grieve the loss of the connection to that person who was a part of our lives for so long. Researchers who conducted brain scan imaging of people who are grieving the loss of a romantic relationship found that the patterns of activity in the brain are similar to that found in people suffering from depression.
In your relationship, you have made an investment in time, energy, emotion, and other parts of your life. Maybe you shouldn’t end your relationship yet. Here are six signs to help you make a decision about whether breaking it off should be your next move.
6 Signs You Shouldn’t End Your Relationship
1. You have great chemistry
You shouldn’t end your relationship of boring sex life has never been a problem for you two, even now that you’ve been together for a while. If that’s the case, you are indeed lucky to have such amazing chemistry and an innovative partner.
Being able to keep things interesting in the bedroom is a good sign that you shouldn’t end your relationship. No one wants to grow old with someone that they are tired of making love to, but if you and your partner have what it takes to keep things passionate, you may have found a keeper. Read our related article to be sure.
2. You fight over little things
He has the remote and won’t let you watch your show. You made a salad for dinner and he’s a carnivore. The fighting sometimes seems endless in your relationship and you just want it to end.
But do you argue over the big things that matter? If you aren’t fighting over your values, beliefs, or morals then you may be more compatible than you thought. Learn to compromise on the unimportant things and you’ll be much happier in the relationship you already have rather than ending things.
All couples have arguments. You can learn to live with having separate preferences for dinner but at least you share a common set of values that would help you raise an amazing family together.
3. You’re stronger together than apart
Are you a better person when you’re with your partner or when you’re apart? Does your partner challenge you? Do they encourage you and inspire you to be your best? If your partner helps you to be your best self, it’s not a good idea to end your relationship.
Few people can say that they have found someone who is a match for them spiritually, in the sense that their partner helps them to be fulfilled. If your partner looks after your mental, emotional, physical and spiritual well-being, you can hardly ask for anything else in a relationship.
4. Your partner supports your dreams
When you told your partner that you wanted to quit your job and be a pastry chef, they said ‘That’s amazing!’ rather than ‘Why on earth would you want to do that?’ you should not end your relationship with this supportive person.
5. You have built something together
When you and your partner have worked toward a common goal of building a loving family, a business, or a project that you intend to keep working on, it’s a sign that you shouldn’t end your relationship.
Ending your relationship now would mean that you will have to keep seeing your ex as you continue to focus on what you are both passionately involved in. That could get quite awkward.
6. Your partner is willing to work at the relationship
If you have someone who makes an effort to tend to your needs, it’s probably a sign that you shouldn’t end your relationship. Having that drive to do what it takes to make a relationship work is indeed a rare thing. Hang on to this one.
On the other hand, if your partner is not willing to make an effort, read our article to see if it’s time to end things after all.
If you decide to end your relationship, at least walk away having learned something. Personal growth can be a part of a unhealthy romantic relationship.
Researchers found that after a breakup, women more often than men reported being able to improve their own characteristics, traits, and beliefs. For example, one person reported that they learned to admit that they were wrong.
Deciding that you should end your relationship is difficult. Once you have grieved for a time, you may be wondering if it’s time to find another partner. Read our article 7 Signs You’re Ready for a Relationship Again for advice on your next step.