The highly sensitive person needs certain things in friendships and relationships, and today, we’ll tell you a few things you need to do if you love one of these special souls.
Before the 1990s, no one had really heard of heightened sensitivity in humans, but a psychologist named Dr. Elaine Aron began to study this trait tirelessly. Surprisingly, she discovered that 15-20% of the population carries the trait that classifies them as highly sensitive, which means they respond to external stimuli more noticeably than non-HSP’s. In highly sensitive people, the part of their brain that regulates emotions performs differently than their less sensitive counterparts.
Before you start a relationship with a highly sensitive person, here are some pointers to keep in mind about what highly sensitive people need from you.
Here are 11 things you need to do if you love a highly sensitive person:
1. Always tell the truth and don’t hold back your emotions.
Empaths, or highly sensitive people, read energies and body language extremely well. If you want to continue a happy relationship with an HSP, you need to come clean about your emotions, because they will pick up on them regardless. However, they don’t like it when people hide things from them, so just remain honest and open in the relationship. Empaths can sense things going on deep beneath the surface, but they don’t like to play games. They need transparency and trust in a relationship to make it work.
2. Respect their heightened sensitivity and emotions.
They have a deep sense of the emotional world. They can feel other people’s pain and will try to fix it. In return they find themselves with a broken heart. They wear their heart on their sleeve. They have a deep, complex personality and just long for someone to accept and love them regardless of the emotional rollercoaster they tend to put people on. Just love them as they come, and they will love you right back.
3. Give a highly sensitive person ample alone time.
Empaths desperately need to decompress from the world around them, and may disappear for hours at a time in their room. Know that they simply need time to process their environment and recharge after going out in society, and that they don’t want to hurt you. They are not retreating or avoiding you, but rather, protecting their precious energy stores. They get their energy from spending time alone, so make sure to give this gift to your highly sensitive lover.
4. Expect both passion and apathy, depending on the subject.
Empaths, or highly sensitive people, tend to resonate with only a few passions in life, and follow them intensely. They have a creative streak, and probably make this their line of work, if they can. However, they also have what some people would call an “extreme” nature; either they love something, or they can’t stand it. For instance, you might get them to talk for hours about the state of the world and how we can fix it, but they will totally go silent when you bring up sports or shopping. If you love an HSP, you need to respect their interests and allow them to follow their passions.
5. Stimulate their mind.
Even beyond that, HSP’s need stimulation of the soul; they cannot engage in shallow relationships and meaningless conversations. Bring up topics such as how we got here, aliens, space, physics, animals, nature, or anything remotely deep that involves emotions and thinking on a higher level. Otherwise, they might just pretend to act interested in order to not hurt your feelings.
6. Help them fall asleep at night.
Because their minds run a mile a minute, they sometimes have a hard time falling asleep at night. Talk to them gently, caress their back and arms, cuddle with them, or even read to them to get their mind to calm down. Empaths tend to worry about things quite a bit, so creating a peaceful environment at night can do wonders for their insomnia.
7. Go on adventures with them.
Empaths also tend to love nature and spontaneity, so if you love an HSP, take them on an unexpected trip. Surprise them; this makes them feel alive, and takes them away from the mundane nature of daily life that stifles their spirit.
8. Show plenty of affection to a highly sensitive person.
HSP’s also need tons of love, so don’t hold back. Physical touch helps to reduce anxiety and depression, and in empaths, they feel these emotions on a much deeper level. Your affection helps them to feel loved and wanted, and will easily win them over.
9. Encourage them to get out and do things they love.
Empaths can sometimes get in the habit of staying home too often and becoming a total hermit, so try to get them out of the house to challenge them and get them involved in things they love. Your HSP lover might show resistance at first, but they’ll thank you in the long run.