If you want to give love to others, you must first show yourself some love. The foundation of your reality begins from within – and when you consistently send yourself divine inner love, you cannot go without it.

As simple of a concept as that may sound, many still ask, “what’s the next step?” The next step involves “The 4 R’s” – read, relate, release, and re-love! Here are ten simple ways to do it, starting now!

Why We Don’t Show Ourselves Love

Too often forget to take care of–and show love to–ourselves. And, here is the worst part. We make up excuses–one after another–to sidestep the issue.

So, why do we ignore our own needs? Here are the excuses we use to rationalize for skipping out on self-adoration

We are too busy.

Kids. Career. Aging parents. Pets. We put all others before ourselves. And the sad truth is that it deems us ineffective. How can we look after our loved ones without caring for our own needs? Perhaps you have never looked at it in that way.


We feel undeserving.

At times, we are our own worst critics. Although we know we set impossible goals, we are hard on ourselves when we fail to reach them. For example, we might set sights on losing five pounds by Friday. When that day rolls around, we beat ourselves up. And that leads to a feeling of being undeserving.

No extra money.

Ok. So maybe you are tight on funds. But that’s not a valid excuse either! The best treat you can give yourself might even be free! Think of taking 30 minutes to relax, a hot bubble bath in your favorite essential oils, write an affirmations list, or enjoy a long walk with the dog.

You deserve it!

Ten Simple Ways to Love Yourself

Try these self-care behaviors.


1.     Accept Compliments, Especially From Yourself

How often do you show yourself some love by remembering your many positive qualities? Too often, we’re highly critical of ourselves and forget what makes us unique, amazing beings. This negative attitude can affect everything, from relationships to career opportunities. So, make sure you lift yourself as often as possible!

You can practice positive affirmations to get in the habit of giving yourself compliments. Scientific research proves that psyching yourself up may promote beneficial brain changes! Studies have shown that self-affirmations cause neural pathways in the ventromedial prefrontal cortex to increase. This part of the brain governs self-related information processing and positive valuation.

Another study discovered positive affirmations could make the brain more resilient to threatening information. The mind begins to see the value in new experiences and feels more comfortable with the unfamiliar. This likely happens because positivity can enhance your confidence and self-esteem, helping you thrive again!

Affirmations you can practice include:

  • “I love myself unconditionally.”
  • “I can achieve anything I set my mind to.”
  • “I’m beautiful, confident, and strong.”
  • “I have everything I need within.”
  • “I am at peace with myself.”

Remember to accept compliments from strangers, as they simply affirm what you already know within!

2.     Do Something You Truly Love and Enjoy

Doing activities you genuinely enjoy can ease the monotony of daily life and add some excitement to your schedule. Plus, it’s medicine for the soul to do things you feel passionate about. Even if you have a busy work week, you can use the weekends to explore your interests.

Whether you feel drawn to hiking, pottery, karaoke, or yoga, pencil in your favorite activity at least once a week. It will give you something to look forward to and revitalize your spirit for the week ahead.

3.     Say “No” To Others and “Yes” To Yourself

You can’t always turn people down, primarily if you depend on them for a paycheck. However, you can exert boundaries so that others know how to treat you and what you expect in the relationship. For instance, perhaps your boss asked you to take on another project even though you work 50+ hours a week. In this case, explain that you feel burnt out and ask if he can delegate to someone else.

Saying “no” to others and “yes” to yourself doesn’t make you selfish, regardless of society’s thoughts. You have to put yourself first sometimes because no one else will. Our community moves far too quickly nowadays, causing us to feel disconnected and mentally unwell. So give yourself permission to take your power back and move to the rhythm of your soul!

4.     Celebrate Your Strengths!

We’ve become a society of critics nowadays, and usually, we’re the cruelest towards ourselves. Perhaps self-love isn’t taught enough in schools or at home, but it forms the foundation for our lives. How can we become valuable members of society if we don’t value the person in the mirror?

Let’s end this trend toward self-hatred by remembering and honoring our strengths instead of perceived failures. Avoid ruminating about how you did something or what you said in a past conversation. Instead, focus on everything you’ve achieved in life and your numerous talents. We all have a unique purpose here, so never compare yourself to others; it only steals your joy!

5.     Ask For Or Accept Help More Often

Many people view asking for help as a form of weakness in our individualized, atomized society. They do everything themselves, not realizing that we have depended on each other since the dawn of humanity. Those who ventured off alone likely met an unfortunate fate since it made them more vulnerable.

So, please don’t hesitate to ask people for assistance when needed. And, always keep your hands and heart open to offer help to others because kindness keeps the world moving. Studies show that showing love and compassion to others is contagious, so never underestimate how your actions can impact people. As they say, it only takes a ripple to create a wave.

6.     Release Worry, Guilt, and Fear. All Is Well.

This segues back to the topic of self-criticism and limiting beliefs. Stress and worry about something lowers your vibration and blocks any love from entering your life. However, if you affirm that everything is working in divine order, nothing can stop your blessings! So, release guilt or fear because you deserve abundance and happiness like anyone else.

7.     Stop Putting Yourself Down – Lift Yourself Instead!

Love isn’t just for people who have their lives perfectly manicured and put together. We can all experience love and bliss, which only requires you to believe. So, please avoid thinking negatively about yourself because there’s no need to feel flawed. If you focus more on your strengths, life will flow much easier and more enjoyable. Regardless of your circumstances, you deserve self-love, so give yourself this gift occasionally.

8.     Allow Yourself More Time to Relax and Unwind

We can’t keep up with society’s demands without taking time to recharge our batteries. Even a few hours of self-love and care can greatly affect our mood and functioning. When you get home from work, leave all your worries behind and relax your mind.

Run a warm bath with your favorite essential oils, play your favorite music, and turn your home into a sanctuary. Relax into the present moment and watch all your troubles dissipate.

9.     Smile More!

Smiling invites love and positive vibes into your life because it shows others you’re friendly and non-threatening. Like compassion, smiles have a habit of spreading throughout the room, so don’t hesitate to share a grin with a stranger. You never know how that small positive action may also benefit their lives.

10. Tell Yourself “I Love You!”

If all else fails, look at yourself in the mirror and say “I love you!” every so often. It only takes a few seconds but can lift your spirits throughout the day. Having a positive, healthy relationship with yourself ensures your other relationships will flourish. It all begins with how you treat yourself, so don’t hold back self-love; you’re worth it!


Final Thoughts On Showing Yourself Love

Imagine how different the world would look if we showed ourselves more love instead of doubt and hatred. How we treat ourselves manifests outwardly, explaining today’s increasingly divisive, fearful society. Hopefully, these tips above will help you become more loving toward yourself and others. We certainly need all the love we can get, and luckily, we need only look within to receive it.