Self-hatred starts out a lot of different ways. Perhaps, a person is bullied or abused. Or they have been criticized for too many years. All of the negative comments, insults, and hurtful things that have been done to them build up in the mind over time. And if someone isn’t careful, they will start to take all of the negativity deep into their sub-conscious, where it festers and turns into further negative beliefs that make them think that all of it is their fault.
Because of the damaging nature of self-hatred, it is crucial that people learn to change their negative thoughts by starting to appreciate themselves. That way, they can begin to have more of a consistent flow of repetitive positive thoughts that will help boost their self-esteem and encourage change in the way that they treat themselves and allow others to treat them.
In order to begin the process, it helps to try practicing the following six ways to stop hating and start appreciating yourself:
Think About All That You Have Accomplished
If you don’t appreciate yourself because you don’t believe that you have accomplished enough in your life, and it seems like everyone else is further ahead in their careers or goals than you are, then you can stop this negative self-talk quickly by making a list of everything that you do in a day at your job, in your home, and for other people. Afterwards, if you still feel that you fall short of where you want to be, then come up with a step-by-step plan that will help you get back on track.
Consider the Validity of the Negative Messages
Sometimes, in order to appreciate yourself, you have to take a hard look at what other people have been saying about you to see if there is any validity to their messages. For example, one of the tricks that bullies use to make their victims feel worthless inside is to tell them how ugly they are. That does not mean that what they have to say is the truth though. They could be targeting you for the opposite reason, which is that you are actually more attractive than they are. And they feel jealous over your looks. So try challenging their messages by looking closely at yourself in the mirror for a few minutes. Then, mentally tell yourself what you like about all of your features and how amazing it is that you are so unique.
Remember There Are Others Worse Off Than You
One great way to appreciate where you are in life is to consider that there are many other people in far worse situations than what you are in. Some are homeless. Others have no family or friends. And they would love to have a job, house, and loved ones like you have.
Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
In reality, all of us on this planet are just doing the best we can in life. And if you stop to appreciate this fact, instead of comparing yourself to other people, things won’t seem so bad. We all have qualities and talents that make us unique. And it is wonderful to stand out and be different than other people.
Do Something Kind for Yourself
Think about the last time that you rewarded yourself for a job well done. Has it been a while? If so, that needs to change. Just be sure that whatever rewards you give yourself will lift you up inside, not tear you down.
Ask Those Who Care About You to Tell You What They Appreciate About You
It may be a little scary at first, but it is alright to let others know that you have been feeling really down for a while. Ask them to help you feel better by telling them that you would like to hear about any of the things that they appreciate about you. Just remember to do the same for them too though. After all, research shows that everyone can always use a little extra encouragement.
In conclusion, these are just six of the ways to stop hating and start appreciating yourself today. If you find a few others that work for you, give those a try too. And remember, the key to the process of ending self-hatred is to lift yourself up inside. It also means that you stop allowing others that don’t appreciate you to tear you down though. So if you are being regularly bullied or insulted by anyone, be sure to get the help you need to get their negative influence out of your life.