“I’m not interested in trying to work on people’s perceptions. I am who I am, and if you don’t take the time to learn about that, then your perception is going to be your problem.” – Jim Brown, Former NFL Football Player
As we are all well-aware, a relationship is a two-way street; there has to be a mutual and foundational understanding for the entire thing to work out. If this foundational mutuality does not exist, the relationship will likely deteriorate to a point where it is beyond repair.
Perhaps the most difficult scenario is when one person in the relationship is unable to make things work despite all their best efforts. Understandably, this person will often safeguard their emotions by unconsciously enabling denial. “Ah, it’s only temporary” or “He/She will come around.” This is not always the case, however, which is the point of this article.
We’ll discuss a number of signs – 21 to be exact – that may indicate that your partner isn’t interested anymore.
Here they are, in no particular order.
21 Signs Your Partner Isn’t Interested Anymore
1. They are always “too busy”
Two people in a healthy relationship always make time for each other, almost without exception. This is evident during conversation; when they will quickly disengage and fire some random, unmerited excuse about having to do “something important.”
2. They’re around more when they want something
Many humans are inherently selfish creatures, but a disinterested partner becomes a bit more selfish than most. They have no problem ignoring you 90 percent of the time, but that remaining 10 percent is when they “really need” something. Anger ensues.
3. They’re non-communicative
Communication that is non-existent or highly-sporadic is a clear sign of disinterest. After all, who doesn’t want communication with a person they care about?
4. They always talk about themselves…
When there is communication, the topic of discussion always seems to focus on them. This is perhaps most evident when they are on a tirade of something burdensome, like work.
5. …while taking little interest in your life
“How was your day?” is a phrase no longer incorporated by the disinterested one. Instead, they remember they’re disinterested and either shut down or redirect the conversation back to numero uno.
6. They’re very controlling
This is borderline abuse, plain and simple. See, they’re not actually interested in you, but they are interested in controlling you. It’s despicable behavior that should signal the victim to run the other way.
7. They’re incessantly blameful
Continuously blaming someone else, without merit, is most often an intentional act to push someone away. It’s cowardly and, again, borderline abusive.
8. They’re frequently disrespectful
Ugh…yeah… someone that isn’t interested anymore can get downright nasty in their mannerisms and other behaviors. Again, this is their character flaw, not yours.
9. They seem to change you…for the worse
It’s not uncommon for someone on the receiving end of a disinterested person’s mischiefs to feel changed. As a result, you may find that you smile less, are more lethargic, and so on. A very unfortunate realization, indeed.
10. They disregard your value
This one truly is troubling. A person that is (1) lacking basic decency, and (2) categorically disinterested will have no trouble in devaluing someone else; even someone they used to “care” about.
11. They don’t bother including you
Oh, you used to hang out with each other’s friends? Not anymore. They got a promotion and didn’t tell you? Shouldn’t be a surprise…they’re already disengaged.
12. They’re heavy on the excuses
Similar to empty apologies, excuses are thrown around when we lack any motivation in abstaining from such behavior. A person that’s interested doesn’t issue meaningless excuses.
13. They seem less concerned about your welfare
When we truly care for someone else, we make it a priority to concern ourselves with their welfare. Heck, even a stranger can sympathize or empathize with someone else. This is disrespect to the highest degree.
14. They begin ignoring your inner circle
This doesn’t always take place, but ignoring/disrespecting/avoiding your inner circle is an intentional act. It’s effective at provoking anger.
15. They issue empty apologies
Episodes of empty apologies seem to be on a loop when one begins to feel disinterested. It’s simple really: they don’t find it necessary to put meaning behind their words anymore. Kind of similar to how you’re sorry when arriving late at work…if that makes sense.
16. They seem to “forget” a lot
Especially concerning things that they used to remember. When this happens, it is almost assuredly a sign of disinterest. When we’re not engaged, we tend to “hear” more often than listen.
17. There’s a lot of sex, but not much more
“Friends with benefits” doesn’t apply here, as you’re supposed to be considered much more. When casual sexual encounters are frequent, but true intimacy isn’t, it speaks volumes about their real intentions.
18. They’re non-committal
When the other person evades anything in regards to commitment, it’s generally not a very good sign. The only exception to this rule is if you’ve been dating for a short period of time while discussing the future together. Other than this caveat, the other person just isn’t interested much.
19. They treat others better than you
The lady at the local grocery store bagging your stuff seems to get better treatment than you do. When he or she is cordial to seemingly everyone else but you, it’s a definite sign that things are disintegrating fast.
20. They’re cheating
This one kind of goes without saying, doesn’t it? Cheating is a sign of complacency at best, and a sign of complete disinterest at worst. Either way, it shouldn’t be tolerated.
21. You always seem to be crying
This is the unfortunate result of any number of behaviors listed here. Feelings get hurt, people get upset and tears are shed. If this is happening on a frequent basis, it’s past time to move on.