Revealing your feelings to your secret love is a scary but exciting experience. Whether the person is one of your friends or someone else, telling them how you feel can be the start of something new. Many people fear rejection, but these methods can help you overcome the worry.
You don’t know how the situation will go, so keep things respectful and positive. If they don’t reciprocate, you want to ensure you can still be friends or respectful acquaintances. You can’t let the fear of unrequited feeling hold you back, either, because it’s the only way to find out.
While you can’t make someone love you back, you can put your feelings out there. By expressing yourself, you’ll know if there is something romantic between the two of you. Otherwise, you’ll know that your secret love doesn’t feel the same way, allowing you to escape the romantic limbo.
Twelve Tips for Revealing Your Feelings to Your Secret Love
While expressing your feelings to your love will be hard, you’ll be glad that you did it. You will either begin a romantic relationship, or you’ll know that you’re looking in the wrong direction. To make the conversation easier, follow these tips for revealing your feelings.
If you’re nervous about expressing your feelings, you should build up your confidence before beginning. Try to be yourself as you interact with them, and let your personality shine. It might help if you talk to your love about common things first, making things normal and comfortable.
Then, once you feel confident enough, start the conversation about your feelings. As you express yourself, remain confident and hold eye contact. Your confidence will show sincerity, and it’ll show that you’ve given this a lot of thought.
2. Listen Intently
By listening when someone is talking, you reveal that you care about what they have to say. When you show someone that you value their words, they’ll feel supported by you. Make sure to give an attentive, meaningful reply so that they know you understand them.
If you make a habit of listening intently, your secret love will likely know how you feel about them. Plus, it will help you when you vocally express your feelings. The person will already know that you give your undivided attention and listen to them, so they’ll be more open to deepening your relationship.
3. Do Things With Your Secret Love to Show Them That You Care
Doing nice things for the person you love is a sure way to reveal your feelings. If you can ease their burden and help them out, don’t hesitate to do it. It will show how much you care about and love them.
Getting the person coffee or breakfast when you know they’re running late will show that you care. Plus, it’ll ensure that you’re on their mind all day, too. You can also offer to run an errand for them or help when they’re in a bind.
Another option is to pick up their favorite candy bar or treat when you know that you’ll see them. It doesn’t matter what you do, as long as you show them that you care.
4. Have Fun Together
Having fun with someone will bring joy to your relationship. It prevents things from becoming monotonous or boring. When you’re always doing fun things and enjoying life together, they are sure to see how you feel about them.
Your secret love will enjoy knowing that you work to keep things fun and enjoyable. Plan fun adventures to create memories together. These adventures will also show the other person why they should date you, too.
Chances are, while you’re out having fun together, you’ll both let your guard down. Use one of these opportunities to vocalize your feelings, keeping it light-hearted and fun.
5. Make Sure They Know How Important They Are
One of the best ways to reveal your feelings to someone is by telling them how important they are. Share your feelings and explain how they have a positive impact on your life. Give examples so that they know you’re sincere.
By letting them know how important they are, you show how much you love and value them. Don’t hesitate to tell your love that seeing or talking to them always puts you in a better mood.
6. Plan for Quality Time Together
With busy lives, you might not always have free time to make spur of the moment plans. Rather than hoping that something works out for the two of you to get together, make a plan. When you set aside time for your love, they’ll see how much they mean to you.
Plus, quality time allows you to reconnect and express your feelings. Show them that they are a priority in your life, and make sure to plan something meaningful.
One way to reveal your feelings is by using skillful and intentional body language. Start by focusing on eye contact, as it’s a sure way to let someone know how you feel. If you repeatedly make eye contact, they’ll understand that you want a deeper connection with them.
Another way to use body language to reveal your feelings is by lightly and affectionately touching your love. You don’t want to make them uncomfortable, so don’t go overboard. Touch their shoulder as you walk by, or put your arm around them while you walk together.
Studies show that touching someone can cause their brain to release oxytocin, a feel-good hormone. With higher levels of oxytocin, they’ll be more likely to reciprocate your feelings.
8. Be Upfront, Bold, and Honest
When you are ready to reveal your feelings, be upfront and bold. Explain how you feel, and don’t hold back. Make sure they understand that you think they’re special and valuable.
Don’t be afraid to tell them that you love them, either. When you feel so strongly about someone, the best option is to tell that person directly without hinting at it. Get your feelings out in the open, and then the rest is up to them.
You’ll experience a sense of relief once they know how you feel. Even if the other person doesn’t feel the same way, you won’t have to keep wondering.
9. Be Considerate of Them
Think about the other person’s feelings and comfort whenever you can. For example, if you’re going on a hike, bring extra water for them in case they run out or forget theirs. Anytime you’re going to be with them, and you’re bringing things along, bring some for them, too.
You never know when your consideration will save their day. Plus, they’ll be thrilled to realize that you think of them so much and make an effort to ensure their comfort. Little things like this are the perfect way to express your feelings.
10. Write Your Secret Love a Heartfelt Letter
Writing a love letter is a romantic way to express your deepest feelings. You won’t have to worry about saying the wrong thing or forgetting important things you wanted to convey. Sometimes it’s easier to verbalize your feelings through a letter, too.
If you don’t know where to start with your letter, start writing your natural stream of thoughts. You can edit it later and explain things better, so start getting your words on paper and worry about the rest later. Consider what you want to accomplish with your letter, and make sure you incorporate that.
You can also include your favorite memories to bring good feelings as they read the letter. Your personal and heartfelt letter will mean so much to your love, so make it as meaningful as possible.
11. Be Vulnerable
Expressing your feelings can make you vulnerable, and many people avoid it. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable, as it’ll show that you are sincere in your feelings. Express that you love what you have with the other person right now, but you want a deeper connection.
Anytime you reveal your thoughts and feelings without reserve, you become vulnerable. It opens you up to criticism, hurt, and rejection. Putting yourself in this position will be worth it, though, and it’s necessary if you want your love to know how you feel.
Your love will also see that you’re committed to the way that you feel. They’ll realize that you sacrificed your comfort and security by opening up in this way.
12. Tell Them in Person
It might be easy to text your feelings, but it won’t have the same effect. Revealing your feelings in person allows you to make eye contact and see the other person’s reaction. Plus, it makes the moment more special.
When you decide to tell your secret love how you feel, choose a stress-free place. Make sure the space is appropriate for the conversation, and offer a few compliments along the way.
After you reveal your feelings, give them time to react and process the information. Don’t pressure them to explain how they feel right away because you don’t want to come across as too intense.
Revealing your feelings to your secret love is a hard thing to do. It takes vulnerability, as you express your deepest thoughts and feelings and potentially face rejection. Don’t let fear hold you back, though, because being open and honest is always worth it.
Once you reveal your feelings, you’ll know where the relationship stands. Then, you can continue as friends or begin a new romantic relationship. Use these tips to help you reveal your feelings, and it’ll make the conversation a little easier.