We all know that relationships are a lot of work. In the beginning, everything seems so easy. The honeymoon period fades, though, and relationships become more about communication and compromise. Not all relationships are destined to be together forever, but many are capable of overcoming the years. Couples who stay in love for years practice some of the same core habits.
Here Are 10 Habits of Couples Who Stay Madly in Love
This is truly the golden rule when it comes to couples staying madly in love. Good communication is key for every relationship, especially ones that are strong. Being able to talk to your partner will greatly improve your relationship.
But, there’s a huge difference between communication and making conversation with your partner. Author and philanthropist Tony Robbins says, “People often confuse communication for talking or making conversation, and this is the root cause of why many of these same people are so unsuccessful in communicating with their partners. Communication in relationships, at its core, is about connecting and using your verbal, written and physical skills to fulfill your partner’s needs.”
Open and honest communication is a habit that every couple should have, especially if you want your relationship to last.
2. Say “I love you” … a lot
“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” – Lao Tzu
For some people, saying “I Iove you” is incredibly meaningful. That means that they don’t want to cheapen the words by saying them too often. But saying “I love you” too much, is much better than not saying it enough.
Professor and author Terri Orbuch, Ph.D. states, “Saying and doing small, simple expressions of gratitude every day yields big rewards. When people feel recognized as special and appreciated, they’re happier in that relationship and more motivated to make the relationship better and stronger.”
Don’t be afraid to express your love for your partner whenever you feel it. Couples who stay in love for years express their love often.
3. Be kind to one another
Teasing and jokes are okay, but don’t take things too far. If you know that there’s something that your partner is sensitive about, don’t try to tease them about it. Being kind can go a long way.
“Becoming a more effective partner is the most efficient way to assure a loving, intimate relationship. Kindness and having your partner’s back are essential,” says psychotherapist, counselor and the author, Judy Ford. Couples who have a love that lasts for years are always kind to one another. Being kind is how you build understanding and trust.
4. Make time for one another
Even when you’re busy with work or school, always make time to be with one another. “No matter who you are or what your work is, you need to nurture your relationship. Make sure you schedule time for the well-being of your relationship. That includes making “play dates” and also taking downtime together,” says psychologist Lynda Klau, PhD.
Life can get in the way, but couples who have strong and long-lasting relationships always put one another first. Even if it’s only an hour to meet for lunch, having time where you can see one another and connect is important.
Everyone makes mistakes. We’re all human. Even couples who are madly in love make mistakes and accidentally hurt one another’s feelings. However, couples who make their relationship last always know how to forgive one another. Forgiveness can help heal a lot of cracks in a relationship and make it stronger.
Another staple of any strong relationship is compromise. Things can’t always be done the exact way you want them to. When that happens, knowing how to compromise with your partner will keep you both sane.
Dr. Gabrielle Morrissey says, “… compromise is part of a relationship. When you get two people merging and sharing their lives, communication isn’t the only necessary skill to navigate all that and stay happy together…compromise is a big part of it too.”
Being able to concede on some things is part of growing up. It is also part of keeping your relationship good and strong.
7. Enjoy the moment
Stress can build quickly if you’re always looking towards the future. Stress can also cause a lot of strain on a relationship. Couples who have strong relationships always make sure to take some time and enjoy being in the moment. Appreciate the time that you have together, and your love will last for years.
8. Take time for yourself
As much as you love spending time with your partner, you need to make sure that you always make time for yourself. Do the things that you love, and make time for your hobbies. Couples who have strong relationships always take time to make themselves strong, too.
“There is one major cause of relationship problems: self-abandonment. When you decide to learn to love yourself rather than continue to abandon yourself, you will discover how to create a loving relationship with your partner,” says relationship expert and author Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
A relationship should be two individual people coming together.
9. Listen to each other
And that means really listening! Don’t just hear them – listen to what they have to say. Couples who have strong and lasting relationships commit to listening to one another every day. This builds companionship between both partners, as well as trust and affection.
10. Support each other
As a couple, you are each other’s biggest cheerleaders. You’re also the first line when it comes to being one another’s support system.
“Being supportive does not mean doing anything for your partner that makes us uncomfortable. Part of being supportive is to be really present and a good listener, to not constantly stand in judgment and actually have a sincere and caring disposition,” says couples and marriage counsellor Keith Flynn BSc, Dip. Hyp.
Couples with long-lasting relationships support each other. Even when things get tough, being there for one another will keep your love strong.