When it comes to relationships, trust is a must. If you don’t have a strong base of confidence in your partner, your connection will not survive. Staying together when life becomes intolerable and painful requires a healthy foundation of trust.
The opposite of confidence is fear, and nothing good comes from this paralyzing state. Think of trust as the glue that holds everything in place. Most people think that most relationships end because of infidelity or a betrayal, but mistrust can destroy what you have quicker than anything.
Assume you doubt your partner, so you accuse them of all sorts of things. They may not be guilty of doing anything wrong, but you become fearful of their actions because you don’t have faith and trust their word.
Seven Signs That You Lack Trust
Being in a relationship comes with significant responsibilities. If you want your connection to withstand the test of time, you need to have this strong foundation. What about when two people don’t have trust in their partnership? Here are some things that can happen:
- You feel you must be in control of everything.
- You act like a detective monitoring their every move.
- Doubting your partner’s word.
- Every time their phone rings or they get a text, you’re instantly suspicious.
- Your mind constantly replays the worst-case scenario.
- You feel like you can’t let your guard down.
- You don’t feel free enough to ask for what you want and need.
How can your relationship grow and flourish if you don’t trust one another? When you have doubts, you’re going to feel that your union is chaotic, drama-filled, and unpredictable.
Understanding The Foundation of Trust
You must consider that before you can trust someone else, you must trust yourself. Do you make sound judgments in those you have in your inner circle and love? Some say there’s a direct connection between trust and love, but the lines become blurred for some folks.
If you’re building a home, you need a good foundation. Why are so many homes built in the 1800s still standing? The foundations and craftsmanship of these homes were stellar. The master builders cut no corners and used fine materials.
If they had taken shortcuts and used lackluster supplies, the homes wouldn’t have survived the storms, floods, tornadoes, and other inclement weather over the years. Now, think of your relationship as these older homes. You can cut corners and try to take the cheap way out, or you can take time and do things right.
While it may cost you to build the best foundation for your relationship, it’s worth the effort. No one wants a shaky connection and can fail at any moment, as it’s no way to live.
Why Is a Foundation of Trust Important?
At the very least, you need to know that your partner loves you and will be loyal, and it’s a security that is necessary to survive.
It would help if you were vulnerable to them, confided in them, and felt a sense of safety. Here are eight reasons why that foundation of trust is essential.
1. It’s the Base Where Powerful Relationships Are Established
Some countries don’t have the finances or materials to build homes on a solid foundation. They use sand, dirt, or even cardboard. According to Reference, some homes in developing countries are made from whatever scraps they can find, including sticks, twigs, and mud. The foundations are poorly constructed, but it’s all they can afford.
However, a storm can blow in and wipe out everything they worked to create. So, the residents wait and pray that the weather stays good each day. Now, your relationship cannot be on such shaky ground waiting for something to in on it.
You want your relationship to be a safe place where you are loved and protected. Trust leaves no room for fear and insecurity, and when you have complete faith in someone, you’re empowering them to be the person the Universe intended them to be.
2. It’s Freeing
You were meant to be free and not bound by anything. If you want to love your partner, then trusting them can cut any chains of insecurity. When you both trust one another, you have freedom.
Additionally, you want them to thrive in your partnership and as an individual. Since trust is so freeing, you need to make sure it’s part of your union. This confidence means your partner can work late at the office without you going into a frenzy with fear and your mind creating scenarios of doubt.
3. Allows You To Feel the Full Possibilities in Your Relationship
Why do people always think the essential things in a relationship are love and intimacy? While they’re important, a foundation of trust should be at the top of the list too. If faith isn’t made a priority, you’re allowing fear and insecurity to creep in.
If you want to feel the full possibilities in your relationship, start with a foundation of trust. It allows you both to pour out your hearts and souls to one another without judgment or fear. According to The Mind’s Journal, love is born out of trust.
You can’t truly healthily love someone until you trust them, which is a profound thought.
4. Fuels Your Romance Fires
When you emphasize critical things like trust, you’re causing the romance fires to burn brighter. Think of trust as an accelerant. Have you ever cooked on an old-fashioned charcoal grill?
Unless you’ve perfected fire starting, you need something to help it burn bright. In your relationship, a foundation of trust is the accelerant that heats things up. Just like you need to get more oil when you run out, you need to do the same for confidence.
There will come storms in life that will try to put your fire out, but refilling your trust and faith in one another can top up the tank.
5. Gives Reassurance
When you believe that your spouse appreciates and loves you regardless, then you have the assurance your relationship will endure life’s roller coaster. It doesn’t matter if you disagree or have an argument; you know that you’re so much stronger than any difference.
6. Heals Hurts
There will be times when your partner will hurt you. You’re both human and not perfect, so there will be misunderstandings, needs that go unmet, and strains. However, the trust you have for one another will allow you to forgive them even when they fail, and you can pick up and go on.
7. Helps Overcome Obstacles
Trust helps you to make your relationship a priority. You know that whatever comes your way, your spouse will have your best interests at heart. There will always be challenges and things that upset you, but you know that you will work on these issues together when you have a foundation of trust.
8. Gives Your Partner Space
Here’s a big thing in any relationship; your partner needs space and time apart from you. When you have a good foundation of trust, you don’t mind them having some space. However, if you are suspicious and fearful when they’re away from you, you can suffocate them.
Signs You Have Strong Trust With Your Partner
How do you know if you and your partner are doing good and have this base of trust that’s so important? Well, here are a few signs that you’re making it a priority:
- Excellent and open lines of communication: You can both have honest conversations where you don’t fear what you say and you’re willing to share your secrets and fears.
- Putting each other first: You have significant consideration one for another, and you put their needs above yours. You make your partner a priority.
- You have nothing to hide: There are no secrets between the two of you, and you can look at them in the eyes when talking. The two of you wouldn’t dare lie to one another.
- Both partners are willing to admit mistakes: When you have made a mistake, you can talk to your partner about it without feeling judged. You don’t have to make excuses or come up with wild explanations because they understand.
- There’s physical intimacy: True romance is what happens outside the bedroom. You’re strong in your relationship, and the fires burn bright, so you hold hands, hug, and kiss often.
Final Thoughts on Building a Relationship From a Foundation of Trust
Trust can be like a thread finely woven into every ounce of a quilt, and it should be the same in your relationship. If you value trust, make it essential, and protect this foundational building block, so your connection will be strong and stand the test of time. Remember that trust is something earned, and it doesn’t always come easily.
Plus, trust can be broken, and once it’s destroyed, it’s very challenging to rebuild. Foundational issues even in your home are costly and timely to repair, and it’s no different for a couple. No matter your problems, you will still be standing when you build your union based on trust.