How to Tell If It’s LOVE. . . or Just Lust

How to Tell If It’s LOVE. . . or Just Lust

We all want to fall in love. Some of us already have, while many of us are looking for that one person that will make such a profound impact on our hearts that we will never be the same.

Either way, how do you know if it’s truly love or just lust?

Sometimes our heart and mind get so caught up that it’s hard to tell the difference. In the moment, we feel so amazing that sometimes we just don’t care. But, it’s important to be careful. A broken heart can be devastating. Especially if you allow yourself to fall in love with the wrong person (in that case check out Karen Salmansohn’s book “Prince Harming Syndrome”). Or, if you develop strong feelings for someone who doesn’t desire the same level of commitment.

Any and all situations can arise, but we specifically want to help you determine if it’s truly love or just lust.

How to Tell If It’s LOVE. . . or Just Lust

First, it’s important to know exactly what both are and what they aren’t.

Real, true, unconditional LOVE is an intense feeling of affection – it’s fondness, warmth, attachment and endearment in the most intense and powerful way.  True love forms a strong emotional attachment. It withstands troubles, problems, imperfections and upset.

Lust is simply a very strong sexual desire. Lust revolves completely around attraction and sex. While lust is needed for love, love is not needed for lust. It can feel very powerful and usually it does. 😉  But, it cannot withstand time. It’s not unconditional and it will fade.

This may contribute to today’s divorce rate. You’ve got to be careful not to allow lust to dominate the relationship when love is truly the driving force for a beautiful, lasting relationship.

To fall in love, you must be willing to accept that person at their very best and worst. You get to know them fully and see them for who they truly are. You learn about their past and talk about their aspirations for the future. If together you see yourself as a perfect fit and can truly visualize your life together, you may be falling in love.

When you truly fall in love, it’s mutual. You are both head over heels for each other. Falling in love doesn’t mean your life will always be easy. Because, truthfully, it can get tough. But, you can be tough together (trust me you’ll need to be).

You know you’re in love when you. . .

– Fall in LOVE with someone who absolutely adores YOU – who cherishes you fully and embraces your imperfections.

– Fall in LOVE with someone you can’t stop thinking about. 😉

– Fall in LOVE with someone who you love with your whole heart.

– Fall in LOVE with someone that you think is absolutely, all-over-the-place SEXY – mind, body & soul!

– Fall in LOVE with someone who cares about your happiness and listens openly about your feelings.

– Fall in LOVE with someone you admire and who admires you.

– Fall in LOVE with someone that finishes your sentences and compliments who you are.

– Fall in LOVE with someone who makes you feel like you’re the most amazing person in the whole world.

– Fall in LOVE with someone who has strengths in areas that you need improvement. Many of the best relationships are people who are complete opposites.

– Fall in LOVE with someone who you get lost in conversation with (for hours at a time)!

– Fall in LOVE with someone who makes you want to be a better person and can help you do that.

– Fall in LOVE with someone who WANTS to meet your closest friends and family, and then accepts you even after that (haha).

– Fall in LOVE with someone who you hold a deep romantic passion for. In fact, they are the only one you desire!

The TRUTH is when you fall in love, you aren’t choosing lust or love. You are creating a balance of the two. Both are needed for a successful, long lasting relationship. Cheers to you and your relationship success! <3

Join the LOVE Conversation with Kristen:

So, I’ve been married to the love of my life, Christopher,  for over 10 years now. I’ve learned a lot, but I am always open to learning more. In a comment below, finish the sentence and share your love wisdom. . .

Finish the sentence: “Fall in LOVE with someone . . . “

Kristen Butler

Kristen Butler

Kristen has a real love for life! She is the Founder of Power of Positivity and a proud Mom and Wife. She loves Social Media and was a Social Media Maven over 15 years ago. She loves connecting with other like minds! Her interests include positivity, spirituality, law of attraction, health & fitness, natural living, animals and plant-based nutrition. Kristen has dramatically transformed her life in many areas and has a strong desire to help and inspire others daily! Connect with her.

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View Comments (32)


  1. rupali

    September 3, 2014 at 4:33 am

    yeah you are right…
    i am also in love with a guy, and this is awesome feeling…and wanna to marry him…

  2. Dee

    September 3, 2014 at 7:23 pm

    who will love you back no matter what!

  3. Arjun

    September 6, 2014 at 4:11 am

    Heart breaks are devastating. Unfortunately I’ve been there twice. At times even after almost a year it still gets real hard.
    If true love is the most amazing feeling in the world then a heart break is the worst experience you’ll gave in life. So plz people, chose wisely. Right now I’m so immune to pain in life. Like I can still get heart broken ten times over without complaining. Lost my heart to people who never deserved an ounce of it. At times carrying on living seems like dragging a huge rock in a deserted land with No sign of destination. The only thing which ignites life is ‘hope’…that maybe someday things will change. Love is a reason to live. There’s nothing like it.

  4. karismatic88

    September 8, 2014 at 8:40 am

    Fall in love with someone who accepts your past, stands by you in your present and leads you ahead in your future…. 🙂

  5. Kathy Bintz

    September 21, 2014 at 3:23 pm

    Fall in Love with someone who puts your feelings at the top of their list and is completely honest about everything.

  6. Romeo

    October 18, 2014 at 5:13 am

    Fall in love with someone who is very open,accept you as you are and put your feelings at the top of their preference

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