You know those days when everything seems to go wrong and nothing seems to go right? We’ve all had them, but sometimes, knowing how to deal with them without having a heart attack seems impossible. We want to sort out the problems and find solutions, but when that doesn’t happen as quickly as we’d like, we sometimes panic, take out our anger on someone else, or just run away from our problems. However, none of these methods will really make the day any better; it will simply add to your mounting stress. If you really want to keep a level head when things go wrong, and learn to deal with problems rationally and thoughtfully, you just need to keep a few tips handy.
Here are 7 things to do (and avoid) when things go wrong:
1. Express your problems, but don’t lose your temper.
When everything comes crashing down in our lives, we usually turn to friends and family for support. However, just because these people love you unconditionally, does not mean you can take advantage of that and expect them to take all the heat. They will probably endure your wrath, but that doesn’t mean they should. Try to take a few minutes to catch your breath and calm down, so you can explain the issues clearly without letting your anger control you.
2. Talk to your friends, but don’t drag them into your own fire.
You should always go to your loved ones for some guidance, but don’t bring them down if you have a bad day. Bring up the issues, allow them to express their thoughts, and then move on to other conversation. They might have some issues of their own to talk about, too, so remember that everyone, not just you, struggles with something in life. You can always rise above the problems though, by having a positive mindset and believing in yourself to get through it. Your friends can help you get back up on your feet, but just remember that at the end of the day, you will ultimately have to put out the fire yourself.
3. Get opinions on solutions, but don’t let others make decisions for you.
People just love to meddle in others’ lives and try to offer advice; in some ways, it should make us feel good since they care about us, but at other times, it just seems like they’re overstepping their bounds. Let other people try to help you out, but don’t allow them to totally take the wheel and steer. You get the final say on what will happen in your life, so just remember that the next time people try to decide things for you.
4. Try to solve the problems, but don’t beat yourself up if you can’t.
Sometimes, as much as we try to conquer a problem, it just can’t be solved. That doesn’t mean we won’t ever get an answer, but maybe we just need to distance ourselves from the issues and let them work themselves out for a while. You can’t solve every problem in the world, so don’t try. Focus on the things that you know without a doubt you can change, and don’t worry yourself with problems you can’t change.
5. Meet the issues head on, but don’t sit and dwell on them forever.
You should definitely confront the problems in your life head on, but if they continue to linger, you can’t just let them take over your life. Trust that the universe will work things out for you, and if you’ve done all you can to sort out a problem, let it be for a while. Focus on everything you do in life well, and those areas of your life will outshine the times when things go wrong. Dwelling on problems doesn’t make them go away; it just makes them seem worse than they really are.
6. Give yourself space from the problem to figure things out, but don’t run from it.
Sometimes, we just need to distance ourselves from the problems at hand to get real answers. Go on a camping trip, take a drive out into the country, or just find some quiet space in your home or workspace so you can try to sort through the mess. We can find any answers we need when we quiet our minds and go into our hearts, even if it seems elusive and pointless at first. However, going within doesn’t mean we try to escape from our problems by just listening to our inner voice and not getting out there to conquer the problems. Don’t run from your problems; rather, distance yourself for periods of time to decompress and rebalance your energies. When you do confront your problems again, you will feel much more prepared and resilient.
7. Take things seriously when things go wrong, but don’t forget to have fun, too.
Just because this journey is temporary, doesn’t mean we shouldn’t take some things seriously. If you need car repairs or if someone steals your credit cards, for example, you need to take action immediately. However, you shouldn’t let your problems totally rule your life. After you tackle some of the problems for the day, go out and do something you truly enjoy. Act like a kid again – buy a coloring book, play with sidewalk chalk, watch a Disney movie, or just something that takes you away from adult responsibilities for a while. After all, being human is about letting go and giving into your inner child sometimes; growing up doesn’t have to totally kill your spirit.