Likable people have an aura of confidence and joyfulness. They are always smiling. These folks don’t carry the world on their shoulders or have anything that forces negativity in your presence. Their behavior is easy. But what makes others like someone so much? What attracts us to them?
Being likable means having qualities that make others feel comfortable and attracted to you. Likable individuals are often friendly, approachable, and empathetic, with a positive attitude and a genuine interest in others. They have good social skills and connect with people on a personal level. Being likable can help to build strong relationships, create positive first impressions, and increase opportunities for success in both personal and professional settings. Ultimately, well-liked people are those who others enjoy being around.
To be likable, you must have good communication skills, including listening actively and responding appropriately to others. Well-liked people also tend to have a sense of humor, which can help ease social tension and make others feel more relaxed. Being likable can also involve being open-minded, non-judgmental, and accepting others’ differences, creating a more inclusive and welcoming social environment. Additionally, likable people tend to be confident in themselves without being arrogant and show genuine interest in others, which helps build trust and rapport with others. Finally, being likable involves being authentic and genuine rather than putting on a facade or trying to be someone you’re not.
Here are six behaviors that make people like you more:
1. They want nothing in return.
Likable people genuinely ask for nothing. They sit with you, share a cup of coffee, and converse. They make eye contact, smile, and want to be with you. The likable individual places you in the moment. In an interview, author Toni Morrison shared with Oprah many years ago that one of the most critical aspects we possess is the art of being present with anyone. If someone walks into the room, give that person your attention.
Likable people can put whoever is around them first and foremost for attention. They want to help and will offer assistance with wholehearted presence. A likable person wants to help you, but not for their benefit. They want to make sure they can be of service to you because they have endured their share of struggles.
2. They have incredible listening powers.
A likable individual will let you talk and share about your life. When you walk away from them, you immediately think, “Wow, what a great person. I know nothing about them.” They will make you the center of attention and have no problem making you feel lighter with all you share. They can feel like a free therapy session. You will often admit, “I’ve never shared this with anyone before.”
These folks have such a beautiful sense of awesomeness that the person talking doesn’t realize they haven’t even asked about them. But that’s the incredible characteristic of a likable person: they are never selfish. They believe everyone is owed a moment of feeling special. After all, don’t we all want to be heard?
3. They aren’t insecure.
Likable people have no hangups about how others see them. They are happy in their skins. They know that they will meet many people when they are in a group setting. The likable person can transfer that confidence to others when they speak with them. You can’t be jealous of someone providing space for you to feel good about yourself. They compliment others with easiness.
These types of people don’t care how anyone sees them. They only want to make sure you know your greatness. They will do anything to make you feel good about yourself. You can start a conversation with them, complaining, and they will change it and say something like, “Isn’t that an amazing opportunity for you to….”
4. They are genuine folks.
The likable person has nothing to prove. What you see is what you get with them. They are genuine in all aspects. If they don’t like something, they will let you know. They speak up and share with others, even if the subject doesn’t agree. They can let you know, “I admire your opinion. Let’s agree to disagree.” And they will say this in a non-condescending manner that doesn’t feel intrusive. It’s just a matter of choosing your language and your tone. The likable person knows that words have power, and they will utilize language most commonly without ever feeling attacked.
5. They do not judge or criticize.
These folks like everyone. And, if they don’t understand something, they will accept it as is but never judge or criticize you for what you are doing. The likable person believes everyone is entitled to lessons, opportunities, and opinions. They learn from others. These people know that diversity is the secret to growth. If you want to be liked, start holding back any judgment against another. Likable people have no class barriers or standards. They can sit with the homeless person as easily as a rich one. They know that life has ups and downs and everyone is the same.
6. They touch people.
The likable person has few personal boundaries. They like to touch and hug. It doesn’t matter who you are. They enjoy feeling the person nearby, and not in a creepy way, of course. They make you feel comfortable but not pushing themselves on you. These people know how to read body language. They aren’t shy individuals; whether it is a pat on the shoulders, a handshake, or a hug, the likable person connects with you. A handshake will do if you are trying to be likable and have an issue with touching others. Touching is one of the most expressive arts of communication.
Final Thoughts on Behaviors That Make People Like You
Likable people are liked because of what they give: full attention, compliments, listening skills, and friendly advice. They are teachers and givers of time. They laugh at themselves and rarely show any negative qualities. Whatever happens in their lives, they move past those things with grace. To be liked, you must be selfless, giving, and willing to put others in front of the conversation. The likable person wants to be present and enjoy.
If you want to become more likable, engaging in self-examination and critically examining your behavior and social skills is essential. It means being honest about your strengths and weaknesses and identifying improvement areas. You should also seek feedback from others by asking directly or observing their reactions to your behavior. Once you clearly understand your strengths and areas for improvement, you can make changes and develop the skills and qualities to make you more likable. However, this process requires self-awareness, introspection, and a willingness to change, which can be challenging but ultimately rewarding.