Attraction is a beautiful mystery. The way our heart flutters in the presence of a particular individual. Or how our mind repeatedly drifts towards thoughts of them. It’s a profoundly human experience. Attraction, however, is a deeply subjective phenomenon. What one person finds alluring, another might find mundane.
Despite this subjectivity, science has shown us several universally appealing traits and attributes most people find attractive. Let’s explore these together, not just as points to apply but as a journey into understanding the intricacies of human attraction.
Try These Five Things to Be More Attractive:
1 – Be Entertaining
This isn’t about turning into a clown or comedian. From a psychological standpoint, being entertaining means tapping into our brain’s inherent craving for novelty, engagement, and stimulation. We have a unique blend of interests, preferences, and values. What one person finds dull, another might find exhilarating.
So, the secret lies in authentically engaging in your way, fostering intrigue and curiosity. Embrace your individuality, your distinct sense of humor, your particular train of thought. People are more likely to be attracted to someone genuine, vibrant, and, in their way, captivating.
2 – Act Quickly When You and Someone Find Each Other Mutually Attractive
Time is of the essence when it comes to attraction. Our brain’s attention span is surprisingly short (even shorter than a goldfish’s!), meaning our impressions must be swift and impactful. The thrill of attraction often lies in the spontaneity, the unexpected. Hence, you’ll want to act with alacrity to spark someone’s interest, seizing the moment with grace and confidence. Remember, the key is not to rush your actions but to respond promptly and authentically to situations.
3 – Use Open Body Language
Research shows that body language is among the most important drivers of attraction. More specifically, positioning the body to convey “openness’ is among the most critical drivers of attraction.
Body language goes beyond mere posture or positioning. It’s a powerful form of communication that often transcends cultural and linguistic barriers. Open body language speaks of a person’s openness to experiences and interactions, readiness to connect, and interest in the world around them. It suggests a person who is not just physically present, but also emotionally and mentally engaged. It conveys a certain level of vulnerability. In fact, it invites others to approach and interact, exuding an appealing sense of authenticity.
Open body language also exhibits self-confidence—a universally attractive trait. Confidence is not about dominating a room or overshadowing others. Instead, it’s a quiet assurance, a comfortable acceptance of oneself with all its imperfections. When a person exhibits open body language, they’re showing that they’re secure in their own skin. They’re open to engagement, not threatened by differing viewpoints, and confident enough to display a receptive demeanor. This transparency is a powerful attractor. It demonstrates that you’re not afraid to be yourself, and that’s incredibly appealing.
4 – Smile Often
Sometimes, the most straightforward actions are the most powerful. A genuine smile can light up your face and make you more appealing. Smiling intensifies perceptions of attractiveness, so much so that it can compensate for perceived physical unattractiveness. However, the emphasis here is on authenticity. Fake or forced smiles can come across as insincere. So, aim to cultivate a sense of joy and positivity within you, which will naturally translate into warm, genuine smiles that can win hearts.
Here’s the research that suggests smiling is universally attractive:
Researchers at the University of Bern examined this relationship between attraction and smiling in two experiments. During the first (and most telling) experiment, participants viewed a series of photographs consisting of alternating expressions of outward happiness (smiling) and other varying expressions. The participants were then asked to gauge the relative attractiveness of the photographs.
The researchers summarized: “The results of Experiment 1 revealed that the evaluation of attractiveness is strongly influenced by the intensive of a smile expressed on a face: A happy facial expression could even compensate for relative unattractiveness.”
5 – Have a Sense of Humor
A good sense of humor can be an irresistible magnet. It’s not just about cracking jokes but more about seeing the lighter side of life and making others feel good.
When we laugh, our brain releases a cocktail of feel-good chemicals like endorphins, oxytocin, serotonin, and dopamine, making us feel happy and relaxed and enhancing our attractiveness. A sense of humor indicates that you can bring joy and positivity to others’ lives, undeniably appealing qualities.
Here’s an example of how that relates to attraction.
Ask a close female friend if they’ve seen any Mike Myers or Jim Carrey films (e.g., the “Austin Powers” or “Ace Ventura” series). If so, ask them if they found Myers’ or Carrey’s characters attractive.
If you’re uncomfortable doing this, YouTube Myers or Carrey movie clips and sift through the comments – many women find both men highly attractive.
Why is this?
Myers and Carrey are not physically-unattractive men (admittedly subjective!). But they’re not Brad Pitt or George Clooney, either. Still, Myers and Carrey demonstrate an inimitably-powerful sense of humor, namely making people laugh (hysterically). And many find them highly attractive for their hilarious sense of humor.
Final Thoughts about What Makes Someone Attractive
So moving forward, remember that attractiveness transcends superficial physical traits. It’s about the whole person—their personality, confidence, passion, sense of humor, and most importantly, their authentic self. These are the elements that create the potent magic of attraction.
Science has provided us with some insight into universally attractive traits. However, the essence of attraction is as individual as we are. What makes someone attractive is a profoundly personal mix of many factors. In striving to become more attractive, the goal should not be to conform to a set of universal standards but to enhance and express your true self more fully and genuinely.
After all, the most attractive you is the authentic you. You can create meaningful connections far beyond the surface by embracing who you are and sharing that with others. Remember, you are uniquely captivating in your own right, and your attractiveness shines brightest when it is authentically yours. So, dare to be yourself, dare to express, and dare to attract!