True love is something you experience only if you learn to care for someone despite their flaws or how they look. However, you shouldn’t fall in love with just anyone. Just because you can theoretically love someone who hurts you doesn’t mean you should. If you are looking for a new partner, you should always look past physical attraction to ensure they have some attractive traits.
Many people think that having standards for dating means you are shallow. And that can be true if your criteria are about appearance or wealth. If you only date blonde-haired people, don’t be surprised if you’re seen as shallow. Physical attraction is important as someone’s looks give you the first impression of them. If someone is not your type, then no one can condemn you for not dating them.
But there are many other attractive traits that you should prioritize. The most essential qualities are the ones that define someone’s personality. How they act and how they can treat you can make or break a relationship.
10 Attractive Traits to Seek for a Stable Relationship
Beauty transcends looks…what’s inside also counts. Look beyond physical attraction for these qualities.
1. Honesty (Maybe the most essential of these attractive traits)
At the core of every successful relationship lies honesty. If two people are honest, they can communicate and have trust. Moreover, honesty is fundamental to ensuring your relationship doesn’t become toxic. So, when you look for someone new, learn if they are honest.
This is an attractive trait that you should never give up on. Don’t settle for someone comfortable with lying to you from the beginning. Even if they are white lies, they still show that the person cannot be trusted. If they can lie to you about what they ate yesterday, what’s to say they won’t lie to you about more significant things? That’s not the type of person you need in your life. Your new partner should be able to be open with you, no matter what.
One of the most attractive traits someone can have is being respectful. Your relationship will never work if your partner doesn’t treat you equally. To be happy, you need to find someone who would never consider you beneath them. Someone who respects you will listen to you and consider your perspective. You can tell if they do even from the first date.
If they insist on going to a place you don’t like, that’s your sign to get out of there. But they’re a keeper if they ask for your opinion and plan everything with your preferences in mind. Also, if they try to get to know you and never act condescendingly, that’s a good sign. Of course, respect means much more than that. But these are a few things that you can look for as early as your first date.
3. Integrity and Values Are Highly Attractive Traits
You should always strive to be with someone who has integrity and a robust set of values. One thing that you will always consider an attractive trait is when someone shares your values. Sure, society has become more and more open-minded. You can be with someone of a different culture, religion, or economic background. But it’s always nice to share your values with the person you are dating.
Even if you don’t have the same values, being with someone with integrity is essential. That shows they are good and want to do good in the world. If they keep their word and take accountability for their mistakes, that’s an attractive trait. This is the kind of person you can create an emotional connection with.
Everyone likes to have fun. But an attractive trait in a potential partner is their maturity. When you want to build a life with someone, you must know they can be serious.
Being mature doesn’t mean being stuck up. It just means that they know how to balance fun and responsibilities. A mature person can converse intelligently and care for their issues when necessary. That means you won’t be stuck caring for the person you are dating.
You never want to fall for someone who will try to impose their views on you. Nor will you be able to form a meaningful emotional connection with someone close-minded. An attractive trait you should look for in a new partner is openness. Being open doesn’t mean they won’t have opinions and values. But it means you can openly communicate and share your thoughts and feelings. They won’t judge you for who you are.
On the contrary, they will embrace it and try to learn from you. More importantly, look for someone who isn’t bigoted and accepts everyone regardless of their background. If you date someone who looks down on people because of their culture or race, it’s time to dump them. This kind of internalized hatred will inevitably seep into your relationship. But that’s not a risk if you date someone accepting.
In any long-term relationship, problems will arise. There’s no way to avoid having some issues. You won’t always see eye to eye. Sometimes you want different things. To solve these issues, you need to be patient with someone. You need to know they won’t get angry when things don’t go their way.
Patience is also essential when you are dealing with personal issues. Having someone willing to take their time to help you out is imperative. If your partner isn’t willing to wait for you to solve your issues, the relationship won’t last.
This might seem counterintuitive to some people, but independence is one of the most attractive traits. When you are with someone, you don’t always need to be all over each other. It’s way better if you can have your own life. In that case, the relationship will be a bonus instead of the center of your existence.
If someone is too clingy or always relies on you, that’s a red flag. Your job in a relationship is not to take care of your partner as if they are your child. They need to be stable and have a life of their own. Of course, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t help them during tough times. But, if they always hang out at your place as if they lived there from the beginning, that’s not ok.
8. Look For Satisfyingly Attractive Traits, Such As Empathy and Affection
Having an empathetic and affectionate partner is something everyone wants. But they must be like that with everyone, not just you. Sure, they must treat you right. A good partner will always want to take care of you. For example, they won’t be ashamed to hold your hand in public. But you can only tell how genuine they are by seeing how they treat others.
Pay extra attention to how they treat strangers. Many people can treat their family and friends nicely. But true empathy is about being kind and understanding towards everyone. If they help people in need, that’s your sign they would make a great partner.
Ambition will always be an attractive trait. It shows that they won’t just settle. Instead, they will always try to improve on all fronts. And it’s not just about getting a promotion, though ambitious people want a promising career. It’s also about personal growth. They will always strive to learn and fix their flaws.
As you go through life, you will change and grow. And you want someone willing to take that path with you. Knowing you are with someone who will work to improve will also strengthen your faith in the relationship. But you need to be careful, as they could become too ambitious. Make sure they won’t sacrifice you for their growth. When you meet someone new, discussing how both of you see your future is important. This way, you can gauge if their ambition is healthy or not.
10. Sense of Humor
So far, all the attractive traits we’ve discussed have been more serious. But it’s essential to have a fun relationship. Not everything needs to be somber all the time. Research shows that partners with a shared sense of humor have stronger relationships.
So, look for someone who gets your jokes and has a similar sense of humor. If you are sarcastic and dry, you’ll get along the best with someone whose jokes are the same. This is because you’ll get each other instead of coming across as offensive. Humor is very personal; you don’t want to spend your whole life explaining your jokes.
Plus, you can bond and create a deep emotional connection through humor. You don’t just need someone who is objectively funny. They can be objectively unfunny. You’ll have a strong relationship if you share a sense of humor.
Final Thoughts on Some Attractive Traits to Look For in a New Partner, Besides Physical Attraction
Many people make the mistake of conflating physical attraction and true romantic attraction. Even though looks are important, there is a difference between lust and love. For love, you need a more profound connection than the one given by physical attraction. And there are many other things more attractive than looks. Personality and values are things you should value at least as much as looks, if not more.
Meeting someone new can be scary. It can be hard to read new people from the first date. But that doesn’t mean you can’t have guidelines for what you are looking for. Plus, knowing that you can have a stable relationship is more attractive. Sure, having flings can be excellent. But your potential partner must have certain qualities if you want something more.
That doesn’t mean you need to be stuck up about your choices. Give them a shot if someone isn’t as tall as you’d wished but is a fantastic person. But don’t settle for someone dishonest and unreliable just because of physical attraction. Make sure your partner has integrity and is respectful and affectionate. You should always look for the ten attractive traits listed above when dating someone. And, if they don’t have them, maybe it’s time to dump them.