“True love is not a strong, fiery, impetuous passion. It is, on the contrary, an element calm and deep. It looks beyond mere externals, and is attracted by qualities alone. It is wise and discriminating, and its devotion is real and abiding.” – Ellen G. White
When is the last time you thought about the innate qualities that make you absolutely adorable?
Maybe you are too busy, scattered, or distracted that you haven’t thought about these qualities for some time. Make no mistake: you possess unique qualities that people truly appreciate and admire. Perhaps without even knowing, someone drew inspiration and strength from these qualities.
Think about the people in your life who you adore and are inspired by. What is it about these individuals that stimulate your inspiration? Perhaps it’s a mother, father, sister, brother, grandparent; could be someone who is not related, or a romantic interest. Is it their humor, strength, intelligence, honesty, energy, resilience, or something else? You can probably think of at least one person that has influenced you in this way.
Adoration – love, devotion, respect, reverence or strong admiration – is one of the strongest emotions that we feel. To adore someone is to be in awe of their being. Further, it creates very strong feelings of attraction. By exhibiting our qualities, we indeed create feelings of attraction and admiration in someone else.
Perhaps you possess some of the following qualities, perhaps you don’t. However, it doesn’t mean that you can’t develop them. Here are nine demonstrable qualities that cause attraction and adoration:
9 ways to attract someone who adores you:
1. Be Yourself
There is nothing more attractive than embracing who you really are and showing that to others. Even if you succeed in attracting someone by using tactics that don’t reflect your true self, it is almost guaranteed that your true self will be discovered. When you allow your unique self to shine through, people will realize, respect, and yes, even adore that.
It all boils down to the fact that we are all truly embodiments of love. Why would you want to create something outside of that? You may have to discover yourself for yourself first, but when you do, you won’t want to ever be anyone else.
2. Be honest
Being honest about your thoughts and feelings is attractive. Honesty, even when it’s uncomfortable, demonstrates individuality and confidence. On the other hand, dishonesty is seen as selfish, manipulative, and egocentric.
Unfiltered honesty about your opinions and perspectives appeals to most people. Those that disagree with and admonish you because of your opinions do not demonstrate understanding or rational thinking. They’re being harshly judgmental and showing people they are ignorant in the process.
Simply put: be honest in everything that you do. Anything else is lying or deceitfulness, plain and simple.
3. Have a sense of humor
Having a sense of humor is a tremendous asset. Life is complicated and messy at times, which makes this quality all the more important. It also turns out that a sense of humor is a quality that causes attraction and adoration.
Women reading this article will attest to humor being incredibly attractive in both friends and romantic partners. Turns out that there is a biological reason why women view humor necessary in both plutonic and romantic relationships.
In a study done at Stanford University, 22 children aged six to 13 were shown a series of video clips – some of which were funny and some not. The children were hooked up to a functional magnetic resonance imaging machine (fMRI) to measure their brain’s activity.
When viewing the humorous material, girls showed more positive feelings in response than the boys did. Further, the girls felt more of a sense of reward in watching them.
Make them laugh, fellas.
4. Be confident.
Confidence is not only important in attraction, it’s also important for an individual’s self-esteem. Confident people are easily observed, as they often radiate positivity, courage and self-respect.
Often times, confident people are the change agents of society. They believe very strongly in their ideas and their ability to get people to get behind them – often through sheer self-assurance. It takes a tremendous amount of confidence to create a following – in both yourself and in other people.
The former Steve Jobs, co-founder of Apple, is a perfect example. Jobs took a computer prototype manufactured in his garage, created a brand, and built a multi-billion dollar empire. Jobs and Steve Wozniak, the other co-founder, dealt with obstacle after obstacle before Apple, Inc. was actually established. Not to mention, Jobs was fired and re-hired as CEO from the very company that he helped create!
5. Practice selflessness
Putting others before ourselves is not something for the faint of heart. Individuals who are selfless have changed our world in incredible ways. These agents of change have often shouldered the heaviest burden; and through their willingness to sacrifice themselves for the greater good, these people continue to earn the respect and adoration of people around the world.
Jesus; Buddha; Gandhi; Mother Teresa; Nelson Mandela; Martin Luther King Jr…some of our greatest leaders were also the most selfless.
Now it turns to you. Is selflessness one of your qualities?
6. Be open-minded
As human beings continue to evolve, our society does as well. We are witnessing the challenge of conventional thinking on various issues – gay marriage, marijuana use, armed conflicts, global warming, etc. – viewpoints that were once considered untouchably mainstream.
Regardless of where you stand on an issue, the ability to remain open-minded is an essential quality to have. The ability to challenge conventional thinking, expand your consciousness, and pursue knowledge is invaluable. It also demonstrates intelligence and fluid thinking – two other traits that are admirable in people.
7. Be helpful
Have you ever met a selfish person? What was your impression? Similar to most people, you likely didn’t have a favorable opinion. The willingness to help others is something that our world needs more of. Many of the problems that exist – poverty, hunger, and other social ills can be solved if more people just make a determined effort to help.
If you’ve achieved some sort of success and are financially capable, consider donating to a worthy cause. Even better, consider donating your time. Numerous volunteer organizations exist within your community and are always looking for volunteers to work with and promote their cause.
8. Practice humility
What a wonderful breath of fresh air to be around someone who’s successful and intelligent, yet humble and unassuming. In America and other places, we’ve idealized people who are boastful and brash if they’ve achieved any success. The axiom “Actions speak louder than words” has seemingly fallen by the wayside.
Humility is an attractive quality because it’s becoming increasingly rare. There will always be the crowd that idolizes the brash and domineering qualities of successful people. However – for us – true admiration and respect is best reserved for those who quietly and unpretentiously make the world a better place.
9. Be resourceful
Resourcefulness – the ability to deal skillfully with new or difficult situations or to find solutions to problems – is a wonderful quality to have. Our experiences have given us a wide range of knowledge that enables us to help ourselves and others.
It’s not enough to simply possess knowledge for your own benefit. It should be used to help others in some way. Remember that not everyone is blessed with the same gifts that you are, and that you can make a big difference in the life of someone else.
Look into becoming a Big Brother or Big Sister, volunteering in a classroom, helping a child to read, volunteering in a hospital, or something else.