When you observe today’s world, you might come to the conclusion that people seem self-absorbed, entitled, and selfish. In the age of selfies, self-promotion, and self-indulgence, we seem to have an obsession with garnering attention and inflating our egos…on the surface. However, if we dive deeper into this idea of focusing on ourselves, we can start to understand why putting ourselves first, having confidence, and loving ourselves serves as the foundation for building a healthy, happy life.
“I choose to honor my feelings. I choose to give myself permission to get my needs met. I choose to make self-care a priority. I choose me.” – Daniell Koepke
Before we continue, let’s first look at some definitions.
- Self – a person’s essential being that distinguishes them from others, especially considered as the object of introspection or reflexive action.
- Selfish – (of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one’s own personal profit or pleasure.
What if we combined these two definitions to encompass the idea of having consideration for others by becoming better people ourselves? If you still think this sounds selfish, we hope you will hear us out as we explain why you shouldn’t feel guilty about making this coming year all about you.
Here are 7 reasons why you need to make 2016 your selfish year:
1. You will have better relationships with others.
Have you ever noticed how many people in the world have rifts and struggles in their relationships? Whether with their bosses, parents, lovers, or friends, so many relationships become tarnished and weathered by pain, guilt, anger, and just the strain of daily life. Underlying these seemingly unstoppable issues is one core problem: a lack of love for oneself.
Remember, if you don’t take time and energy to break through your own barriers and become love yourself, you will always seek it from others. When you strip away worldly attachments, relationships, desires, and everything else, you just have you. As you learn how to have a healthy relationship with yourself, and not allow your ego to bring you down, all your relationships will start to go through a metamorphosis.
All relationships in life depend on how deeply you can love yourself, because you attract what you are. Life is simply a mirror, so if you don’t see love and understanding when you look outside yourself, you have to first correct the blockages and negative thinking patterns within.
2. You will learn unconditional love.
This world could use some more love, but unfortunately, most people look outside themselves for acceptance. We live in an age where we pine for likes and comments on our pictures to give us self-worth, but we do very little to garner this feeling ourselves. We don’t spend enough time healing our souls, wrapping our arms around our insecurities and giving ourselves the love we deserve.
If we don’t offer ourselves affection and compassion, how can we ever expect to receive that from other people? By loving yourself wholeheartedly and unconditionally, you will have so much goodness in your heart and soul that it will overflow, attracting others who also love themselves.
In the age of self-indulgence, don’t be afraid to indulge in your own love. Nothing feels better than having so much love for yourself that nothing outside of you can possibly take it away.
3. You will uplift the lives of everyone around you.
By loving yourself, others will feel better just by interacting with you and being in your presence. If others see you acting carefree and blissful, it encourages them to act positively and see the good in themselves, too. Simply put, by putting your needs first and healing past wounds within yourself, you don’t just change your life; you change the world.
4. You will improve your health.
Inevitably, when people begin to search inwardly for answers, they discover that they run the show. They make all the decisions in their lives, including how healthy they choose to be. By loving yourself, you will only want to put loving things in your body. You won’t want fake processed foods and sugary carbonated drinks; you’ll want foods that increase your energy and vitality, and make you feel more loved and cared for. Taking time to prepare healthy meals full of living foods does not make you selfish; caring for yourself does not make you selfish. It makes you born again, transformed into an improved human being, and nothing about that is selfish.
5. You will get out of your own way.
Much of our problems exist on this planet because we don’t love ourselves; heck, we don’t even like ourselves. We allow our minds to control us like puppets, dictating our every move and making us believe we have no value. Therefore, we create chaos and destruction because we feel we cannot control ourselves. The lack of love in our world directly reflects the lack of love for ourselves. When we step out of our own way, out of the shadows and into the light, we make the world a little less burdened. By putting ourselves first and removing all of the old, deflating thought patterns, we set ourselves free. And the world becomes a little lighter, in turn.
6. You will learn to become your own best friend.
Not only will you attract people who also love and care for themselves, but you will learn to be there for yourself when no one else is. You will no longer feel lonely; you will simply enjoy alone time when you have it, without feeling anxious or depressed. Going deep within yourself and gaining greater understanding will allow you to truly know yourself, which will increase your self-confidence and self-esteem.
7. You will start making better decisions for yourself.
Finally, taking time to love yourself will remove everything that no longer serves you, therefore, bringing better things and people into your life. Decision-making will seem much easier, because you will know exactly who you are and what you want out of life. By knowing and loving the Self, you can make choices that reflect your new state of being, and those decisions will fall into perfect alignment with your ultimate goals and desires.
So you see, focusing on the self does not equate to selfishness. True selfish behavior means you only look out for yourself, with no regard for others. However, self-love and care are selfless in nature, because you aren’t becoming a better person to obtain anything from others; you’re changing yourself to have a better relationship with yourself and others. To see and appreciate yourself for who you truly are so you can do the same to others. And nothing about that is selfish.