When a loved one passes, it can feel like someone stabbed a knife through your heart. No matter your beliefs about the afterlife, losing a loved one always hurts on a deep level. We have to adjust ourselves to a life without this person, and the longer they’ve been with us, the more time it will take to heal. When a loved one passes, we have memories to console us, but the image of them so vibrant and alive in our minds can also hurt if we dwell on these memories too much. So, how do we properly heal from losing a loved one? How can we deal with something so permanent and final?
We all have lost a loved one in life, and while time does tend to heal wounds, it doesn’t help when our emotions are so raw, and the loss just doesn’t seem real. So, when you are faced with indescribable grief and pain, remember these 5 things when a loved one passes.
5 Things To Remember When A Loved One Passes
1. You made an unforgettable impact on their life.
No matter how long you knew this person, you made an impact on their life. The interactions you had with your loved one will forever be etched into their consciousness, and your very presence and spirit will never be forgotten. You have to realize that everything here is temporary, and loss is part of life. While this doesn’t make it any easier to deal with in the weeks or even months after you lose someone, it can help in the long-term.
No one likes losing a loved one, but as long as you let them into your heart even for a short amount of time, you made an impact on them and brightened their world. You should feel grateful for the opportunity of getting to know them, and share space on this planet while you could.
2. You got to experience life with them, even if it seemed short in hindsight.
Going off of the last point, remember that when you lose a loved one, you got to experience things with them while they were here. None of us are even guaranteed a spot on this planet, and life is truly a miracle. So, even being here with them for that short amount of time is a blessing, because you got to connect, share, laugh, love, and cherish those moments with a beautiful human being. The very fact that the next day isn’t guaranteed to us should make us live life to the fullest, and tell everyone we love how much we care for them.
If the person you lost knew how you felt about them, or how much they meant to you at all, then you should have no regrets when you look back on how you spent your time together.
3. No pain lasts forever.
Also, keep in mind that all pain is temporary. It may seem excruciating, and you might not even want to get out of bed some days, but this too shall pass. You WILL find hope, light, love, and happiness again. To know happiness, we must know sadness, anyway. So, in order for you to find that spark again, you must deal with the darkness.
Let yourself feel the pain, as deeply as you must. Remember to take care of yourself, count on your support system, and take as much time as you need to heal. Your loved one would’ve wanted that for you.
4. You have other loved ones to cherish in life.
Although you lost someone special, you shouldn’t let that take away from experiencing all you can right now in this life. You have other friends and family who love you dearly and need your attention. Of course, we don’t want to discount the pain you feel from losing a loved one, but while you deal with the grief, remember to show love to the other special people in your life. After all, we never know how much time we have with someone, so we have to make every second count.
On that note, remember to keep an open mind after a loved one dies. Many people have had experiences with talking to someone from “beyond,” so you might want to talk to a licensed professional, or medium, who can help you contact your loved one. A review of 20 after-death communications found that people who had an encounter with the deceased felt more able to cope with the grief. This may have happened because people felt reassured by the experience, as it supported their spiritual beliefs.
5. Keep following your dreams.
This one might not seem obvious, but the death of a loved one should remind all of us how very short life truly is. We have to live the hell out of this life, however we see fit for us as individuals. We have to get out there and follow our dreams, no matter how scary they seem. We have to stop spending so much time living vicariously through others, and do what makes our hearts soar. We have to do all of this, for our own good. We all deserve to feel our souls on fire from the sheer bliss of living, and this is what your loved one would’ve wanted.
So, don’t ever let fear stop you.
You’re powerful beyond measure. Let the loss of your loved one inspire you to live every second as if you’re about to take your last breath, because none of us truly knows when that will be.