5 Things To Never Expect From A Narcissist

5 Things To Never Expect From A Narcissist



Narcissists are only concerned with themselves. They are egotistical and self-absorbed. They manipulate situations and people to their benefit. Be wary of anything that comes from them, because ultimately it’s about the grandiose perception.


“You can look at individual scores of narcissism, you can look at data on lifetime prevalence of Narcissistic Personality Disorder, you can look at related cultural trends, and they all point to one thing,” says W. Keith Campbell, PhD, head of the University of Georgia psychology department. “Narcissism is on the rise.”


We all know someone who is egotistical and selfish. But, what can you expect from them with these sorts of behavior?


Here are 5 things to never expect from a narcissist:

1. Never expect empathy and compassion.

Unless you are going to be giving them something in return, don’t expect sympathy. The narcissist is incapable of compassion because it would require them to get out of their own needs. It’s all about “what can I get from you?” If something doesn’t concern them, they have little interest. Your mother could be in the hospital and if you ask them for help, they will avoid you unless they can get something for helping. And, if they are empathetic, it will be for showing others what they did. They are missing an empathy and compassion gene. Most narcissists lack self-insight. In their own lack of worth, they dispose their destructive behavior onto others.


2. Never expect them to listen.

Narcissists are not great at listening to anyone’s problems. They will listen when they need something from you, utilizing your weaknesses or traumas to get what they want. These folks are not the ones you go to in order to vent. They will hear you but never pay attention. If the conversation is not about them, then they have no use for your words. And even then, they will only hear what pertains to their greatness. Dr. Leon F. Seltzer writes in Psychology Today:

“It’s been said about narcissists that they can’t tell where they end and the other person begins. Unconsciously viewing others as “extensions” of themselves, they regard them as existing primarily to serve their own needs—just as they routinely put their needs before everyone else’s (frequently, even their own children). Since others are regarded (if they’re regarded at all!) as what in the literature is often called “narcissistic supplies”—that is, existing chiefly to cater to their personal desires—they generally don’t think about others independently of how they might “use” them to their own advantage. Whatever narcissists seek to give themselves, they generally expect to get from others, too (which is yet another dimension of their famous—or infamous —sense of entitlement).”


3. Never expect anything for free.

When a narcissist does you a favor, he/she will reclaim it quickly. They keep tally on all that they do for others. Unless they can get something out of you, don’t expect them to do it out of the kindness of their hearts. If it doesn’t benefit them, there is no point in doing anything for you. Don’t expect generosity without signing your soul to the devil. The narcissist will lie and cheat to get what they desire for their own benefit. So, if they are doing something for you, expect that it’s all about them.

Inspiration to your Inbox


4. Never expect an apology.

A narcissist does no wrong. If something goes wrong, it wasn’t their fault. They have no problem turning that against you. You can’t expect them to feel sorry for anything because they are perfect. Any misunderstandings are all on you. They couldn’t possibly have done anything to upset you. Narcissistic people are bullies, and they have no problem turning things around to hurt others rather than take responsibility for their actions. The narcissist is self-righteous. They are entitled and deserving of anything, therefore, they are never in the wrong.


5. Never expect gratitude.

The egotistical person will never share the things you have done for them, only those things that you haven’t done. They focus on the negative and the things that are missing at the moment. Do not expect gratitude…ever. They are incapable of taking attention off of themselves. However, they will claim and retell all that they have done for you without a problem and expect gratitude. Dr. Pavel G. Somov writes that, “As a narcissist, perhaps the only way for you to feel special is to command special treatment, to insist on unquestioning compliance with your wishes from others, to demand nothing less than perfection from others.”

Related article: Are You A Narcissist Magnet? Here’s How To Find Out…

Narcissists cannot give of themselves for the sake of giving without expecting recognition, admiration and appreciation. They are manipulators of time and effort. They bulldoze through people and their emotional needs for their benefit. Perhaps the most frustrating thing about narcissistic personality disorder is that it’s difficult to treat with therapy, as clients are unwilling to see they have an issue. In relationships of any kind, it’s even more difficult to acknowledge since the narcissist doesn’t see a problem with themselves. The best way to deal with a narcissist is to have no expectations.

(C)Power of Positivity, LLC. All rights reserved


4 thoughts on “5 Things To Never Expect From A Narcissist

  1. My father, I just realized by reading your article, is a true Narcissist. He only thought of himself, often forgetting about his 5 children, and only did something for someone if he were to benefit from it. I grew up and made the big mistake of marrying someone just like him as most girls do. I remarried and my 2nd husband was totally opposite but had a bad “binge drinking problem” which he hid from me.
    I lost my job and moved in with a guy who was the largest narcissist of all. Always putting me down. I suffered much emotional & verbal abuse from him as did my dog and cat. My cat eventually ran away. I finally left him and lived in my car for 3 months. I’d rather live in my car than with a narcissist anyday.

  2. We work with someone like this. You have described the person to a T. We are trying to get our boss to notice this. She will cry when our boss pulls her in to talk to her. So our boss backs off. Thank you for verifying what we are seeing.

Leave a Reply

Our passion is to serve and bring the best possible positive information, news, expertise and opinions to this page. We want to help our community find and shine their inner light - the truth of love, light, and positivity that is within us all! Read more about Power of Positivity...

Follow Me: