Something is different about the way your partner is acting lately and it has you worried that they might be falling out of love. The signs of a change of heart are easy to see once you look back at the ruins of a past a relationship, but seeing them before it’s too late is more challenging.
No one wants to be blindsided when a relationship ends. Being dumped is psychologically traumatic and can set you back emotionally.
Falling in love is so much more fun than falling out of love, so let’s hope that’s not what your partner is feeling. Here are 5 signs that your partner is falling out of love with you, and how you might be able to save your relationship.
5 Signs Your Partner Is Falling Out of Love
Humans like to think that we are a monogamous species, but we rarely bond with a single mate for life. Still, the romantic ideal of the one true love is something we yearn for. Scientists are looking at our ability to make and break relationships as an evolutionary tool.
A study in the Review of General Psychology found that ‘because romantic love is a species-typical trait, all members of the human species may come equipped with the mental hardware for both falling in love as well as for ending a relationship.’
They believe that we may have evolved the ability to fall in and out of love in order to find the best mates to reproduce with. Being able to fall out of love means that we can keep looking for the best genetic partner to have children with.
1. Less time spent together having fun
Sure your partner spends time with you, but when they are having fun it is with other people, not you. The time you spend together is sleeping, eating, and doing chores, not playtime.
Make it a priority to schedule fun time with your partner. Work to make them laugh and do what they love doing. If you can make your partner smile, you are doing great at trying to keep them from falling out of love.
2. Not sharing emotions
You have no idea if your partner is upset, depressed or worried because he or she will never open up to you about their emotions. If your partner leaves you guessing about their feelings, it’s a sign they may be falling out of love with you.
Emotional cheating often happens before physical cheating does. Being available to your partner as a counselor to help them work through their emotions will help to keep them from seeking someone who will listen.
Researchers who study people falling out of love call it ‘mate ejection,’ like ejecting a disk from a computer drive. They say that stereotypically ‘males are expected to initiate mate ejection in response to their partner’s sexual infidelity. Women are expected to initiate mate ejection in response to emotional infidelity.’
3. Less touching than before
Physical connection is one of the most important parts of a loving relationship because it’s what makes an intimate partnership intimate. Changes in the amount of kissing, hugging, fondling, etc., and not in the positive direction, are a sign that your partner is falling out of love.
4. Your partner is doing something new/different
Change is bad when you suspect that your partner is falling out of love. Change could mean someone else. Instead of waiting around, you can take action if your partner is showing this sign.
Weight change, appearance change, and hobby changes are all bad signs. When one partner is considering a breakup, they often find a replacement partner before ending the relationship. Changes in behavior mean that they are trying to please a new romantic partner.
They never used to care about sci-fi, and now they’re attending ComicCon. They’ve never worn plaid before and now they look Scottish. Major behavior changes are concerning because your partner is changing to like the things that their new romantic partner likes.
5. You talk less than you used to
Your partner used to ask you about your day, but now they don’t seem to be able to care enough to ask you. When we care, we ask questions because we like knowing about our partner. It’s a sign that your partner is falling out of love if they aren’t asking questions anymore.
If this sign has you worried, try asking your partner about their day. Don’t talk about yourself at all. Instead, ask many questions and be as fascinated by what your partner says as possible.
Most people want to not just be heard, but to be understood fully, and deeply. Giving your partner this connection is one possible way to keep them from falling out of love.