Love is intoxicating. It makes the world go round. It’s euphoric. It’s magical. It’s addictive. In all its glory, it takes over and consumes us. Love forces us to see life differently and we react in a manner that’s joyous. Even when we are heartbroken, hurt beyond words, have endured betrayal and loss, we still crave to fall in love. Poets, writers, artists, musicians, and other creative forces thrive on the subject of falling in love. In the mystical ancient words of Rumi: “Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love. It will not lead you astray.” So what drives us to fall in love? What allows us to give it another try even when the falling has hurt us deeply?
Here are five reasons people fall in love:
1. Love makes us whole.
The Greek philosopher, Plato, shared in The Symposium that, “According to Greek mythology, humans were originally created with four arms, four legs and a head with two faces. Fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate parts, condemning them to spend their lives in search of their other halves.” So it is possible that we are spending our lifetime searching for our other half. When we fall in love, it feels as if we are reuniting with a part of ourselves. We begin to see incredible things because somehow we had been missing them.
2. Love calls us to be the very best version of ourselves.
In an article on PsychologyToday, Mari Buti, describes the phenomenon of romantic love. “I think that love ushers us to frequencies of human life that we might find difficult to access otherwise. It opens to something more transcendent than the ordinary flow of life, summoning us, precisely, to a different (and potentially more interesting) edition of ourselves.” In other words, love lifts us to extreme compassion. We are better because of it. The intensity of feeling love and giving love shapes our personalities to be better humans, elevating us from the mundane to the extraordinary. Nothing is impossible when we are embraced by love’s light.
3. Love diminishes the fear of the world.
When we are in love when feel like we can conquer anything. We are no longer alone holding on through difficult matters. Having a partner makes things easier. Where there is love there cannot be fear. They cannot live simultaneously. Love is a high vibration frequency. Fear is a lower one. When we fall in love, we let go of anxiety. True love has no limits. In a physiological matter, fear is driven by cortisol that increases depression while love is driven by oxytocin (the love hormone) which reduces stress and fear. Love simply transcends us into another state of spiritual being. Through the emotions of lust, forgiving, giving, compassion, kindness, empathy, and others, it catapults us to follow our passions.
4. Love infuses our lives with meaning.
We are genetically created to share love. Through love we procreate. We fall in love with our children, our pets, our spouses, our parents, and life. Love gives us meaning. Romantic love energizes us with possibilities, dreams, and the ever knowing that we can conquer anything. Love clears all obstacles while we submit to its mysticism. A life without love is no life worth living. It cures a broken heart. It forces us to give of ourselves when we are lacking strength. It’s more than an emotion. It turns us upside down, right side up, and in circles and all while feeling the power of trust and faith. Love is there for us to give. The only thing it asks of us is to continue exploring it.
5. Love is a drug.
According to psychologist Dr. Rachel Needle, also an associate professor of Clinical Experiences at South University in West Palm Beach, the chemical substance such as oxytocin, dopamine and other hormones have been found as key roles in human emotions, experiences, and behaviors associated with love. “Falling in love is associated with increased energy, narrowing of mental focus, sometimes sweaty palms, light-headedness, racing heart, and a lot of positive feelings.” There is a physical component that is addictive to the high that comes from falling in love. We are physically wired to want more of it. We crave it and once we’ve experience it we cannot live without it. In its lowest point it causes depression, anxiety, and other withdrawal symptoms similar to hard-core drugs.
Throughout the history of time we have pondered on love and why we fall into its enticement. There have been millions of speculations, research, theories, religious and spiritual searches. No one really knows the reason for this absolute desirable emotion. The only thing we know is that we are created to experience it. It makes our world complete. And, no matter how many times we fall out of love, we still hold on to the possibility of falling in its arms again and again.
“Love does not appear with any warning signs. You fall into it as if pushed from a high diving board. No time to think about what’s happening. It’s inevitable. An event you can’t control. A crazy, heart-stopping, roller-coaster ride that just has to take its course.” ~ Jackie Collins