Love is tough to understand and even harder to explain, leaving everyone with different ideas. People fall in love for many reasons, with each situation being different.
Researchers have heavily studied love and what it means scientifically and psychologically. They found biological aspects of the emotional response, but there are also scientific reasons why people fall in love.
People talking about falling in love describe it as intense, overwhelming, and fast. They also explain that it feels like fate, but that’s another concept that’s hard to explain. As time passes and a couple becomes more comfortable together, those initial feelings fade into something more comfortable.
Whether you’re looking for a relationship, are in a new partnership, or have been with your significant other for a while, you might want to know why people fall in love. Since the reasons vary, it’s essential to address many of them to help understand.
Nine Key Reasons Why People Fall in Love
1. Release Hormones
Many hormones are involved in falling in love for different reasons. When hormones increase, it causes feelings of infatuation or obsession. These feelings are why the beginning of a relationship is so intense and romantic.
When your body releases dopamine early in the relationship, it brings excitement and happiness. It makes you feel good as it stimulates the brain and triggers heightened senses.
Testosterone encourages a person to go after the person they want. It gives people the courage to approach someone they’re interested in. This hormone occurs early in the relationship, as well, and increases sexual desire.
Your brain also produces more serotonin when you’re around someone you’re interested in. It makes you feel good as it encourages a positive sense of well-being. This hormone makes people fall for someone because it leaves them wanting more.
Oxytocin is called the cuddle hormone, and its increase makes you feel close to the other person. It’ll encourage you to make long-term plans with a partner, too. Additionally, being near your crush triggers the release of phenylethylamine, giving you the feeling of butterflies in your tummy.
2. They Feel Lovable
People who don’t feel lovable won’t find romance as easily. Those that feel lovable seem to find love a little easier. When they feel this way, they’re better able to give love in return. Feeling lovable allows them to project that feeling to others, opening themselves to a romantic experience.
Not feeling lovable exudes a lack of confidence, potentially repelling love interests. Those who love themselves and feel lovable are more likely to find a healthy, loving relationship.
Your body releases pheromones that affect your behavior and how people feel about you. When people smell your pheromones, they feel closer to you. Pheromones are a person’s unique scent that lingers in sweat and bodily fluids.
Research indicates that the scent of someone’s pheromones can play a role in falling in love. It is one of the first subconscious factors in initial attraction to another person.
Some studies even show that women are attracted to the pheromones of a man with whom they can have healthy babies. Women prefer the scent of a man with disease-resistant genes, indicating that it’s human nature to mate for reproduction.
4. The Body’s Reward System
When your brain uses chemicals as a reward for stimulation, it can make you fall for someone. It produces happiness and satisfaction, encouraging positive feedback on the situation. Once you experience the reward a time or two, you’ll start receiving it while anticipating an encounter.
5. Their Upbringing
Your early life teaches you quite a bit about relationships, including what to expect from them and how to maintain them. It also shows you your role in relationships as you watch the adults in your life handle their partnerships.
People often fall for someone similar to their parents because it’s all they know. They know how to handle that type of relationship and situation, so they are drawn to it as an adult.
Another aspect of your upbringing that can contribute to your love life is your parent’s age when you were born. People respond best to someone close to that age range because they sense more of a bond. So, if you were born to older parents, you might fall for someone of the same age range.
People are more likely to fall in love in an unusual or unfamiliar environment. The unusualness arouses them and can spark a passion for another person they’re with. This reason is also valid for dangerous or scary situations.
7. Fulfilling Needs
Many people find love as a way to fill needs in their life. They might need companionship, love, sex, or other things. When they meet someone who can fulfill their needs, they could quickly fall for that person.
Some people need a relationship, and their options are more diverse, for good or bad. No matter the need, there’s a good chance of love when they find someone who can fulfill it.
Attentiveness plays a role in falling in love because people need attention from their partners. The more you pay attention to someone, the more likely they will fall for you. Likewise, you’re more likely to fall in love with them when you keep your attention on that person.
When someone is attentive toward you, it has the same effect. Satisfying each other’s need for attentiveness will likely lead to deeper feelings between you.
Attentiveness shows that you’re interested in the other person, what they do, and the things they say. When people feel heard and seen, they’ll be more open to a deeper connection, and things will escalate naturally. They’ll know they can turn to you, giving them a sense of security.
9. Appearance and Attractiveness
Studies show that people are often attracted to those who are equally attractive. Desirable characteristics vary for everyone, but they play a role in each situation. Being attracted to someone releases hormones in the brain, making love feel like an addiction.
The people you’re attracted to can also result from your life experiences, which is why your taste differs from others. The faces you were exposed to as a child and the relationships you had to play a role in who you love as an adult. When you have a positive relationship with someone, you’ll subconsciously be attracted to some of their facial characteristics.
People are drawn to and develop deeper feelings for those similar to other people in their lives. This is also why people judge faces that are different from everyone else.
10. Non-Physical Similarity
Sometimes people fall in love because of things they have in common, including beliefs, personality traits, and ways of thinking. Couples that love each other tend to have more in common, although they will have a few differences.
Having similar life views is essential because it shows a possible future together. If you didn’t have the same outlooks on life, you likely wouldn’t fall in love. Lasting relationships rely on similar perspectives on life, and you’ll subconsciously look for someone similar.
While people sometimes fall because of unusual environments, they still strive for familiarity. When people fall for each other, it’s often because they’re familiar. They might have become familiar by spending time together or living close to one another.
However, with online dating becoming more common, there are other ways to develop familiarity. People can now become familiar with one another by simply thinking about the other person. The more often they communicate, the more likely they find love.
12. Societal Influences
Some people believe that no one would find love without societal influences. They would still develop close bonds with others, but things like love stories increase the expectation. It makes people look for passion, companionship, and commitment in another person.
Additionally, people often find romance because the people around them encourage it. They deal with friends and family telling them to go after or become serious with someone. Putting this idea in their mind can work, making people fall for one another.
Final Thoughts on Reasons People Fall in Love
Falling in love is a crazy experience and different for everyone. It’s hard to pinpoint why someone falls for another person, but these reasons here are common. Whether your hormones make you fall in love or it’s something else, the experience is exciting and joyful.
The initial feelings of love change, but it doesn’t change the reason for the deep connection in the first place. While these reasons aren’t accurate for everyone, you’re likely to relate to a few of them.
If you’re looking for a partner, remember these reasons and stay open to love in relatable situations. However, if you’re already in a relationship, see if you can pinpoint why you and your partner fell for one another. There’s still a long way to fully understanding love, so don’t stop here.