The loss of a loved one can turn one’s world upside down. Many days it’s hard to even get out of bed. This is normal, and one day you will be able to get back to everyday life. Your feelings of loss and despair are normal during a period of mourning. Do not feel guilty when you feel ready to heal your soul.
Here are ten tips for recovering during a period of mourning.
It’s time to begin to heal your raw emotions. Here are some words of advice.
1. Take Care Of Yourself
One of the first things that happen when we face pain and mourning is that we often ignore our health. We either eat too much, don’t eat at all, or we stop exercising or doing things we enjoy. Our mental and physical health is put on the back-burner as we live in our grief. There is a period of time where we can mourn.
After this time, it’s important to care for your physical body. When we take care of our physical body, our mental health will be able to improve. Take time to be in nature. Get fresh air, so you’re able to breathe easier. If you don’t want to start running miles a day, you don’t have to. What you need to do is something you enjoy that provides you physical stimulation. Try not to indulge in high sugar and high fat foods.
Don’t go down the rabbit hole of horrible eating. This will just lead you to bigger health issues. It’s also important to watch for bad habits that could lead to alcoholism or taking drugs. Remember that your feelings are only temporary. The high you get from these stimulants won’t fix anything in the long run.
2. Allow Yourself To Laugh
Laughter is medicine for many people. You might wonder why anyone in the world can laugh when you’re mourning. You want the world to step with you. One day you’ll accidentally laugh, and you’ll actually feel good. It’s okay to let in laughter. It’s okay when you’re in the middle of grief to feel as if laughter will never happen again.
In reality, you will laugh again. Try to find the little funny things in the day that bring a smile to your face. Remember the things that your loved one found funny. One day you’ll notice that smile creeping back to your face.
Watch a silly movie or read a funny book that gets a chuckle. It’s okay to laugh even if you’re sad. Some say laughter through tears is one of the most satisfying emotions.
3. Create Your New Normal
One day you will realize that nothing you do can change your loss. The only thing you can do is move forward. You have to restructure your life. This doesn’t need to happen quickly. This will happen as you figure out how to navigate your new normal. Mourning the loss of a loved one doesn’t have a time limit.
You will go through many different emotions. The thing you can do to maintain these emotions is to create new rituals and daily habits. Find comfort in everyday activities. You have to live this new life to figure out how to have the strength to cope with your loss.
Things will not ever be the same, but you can create a new journey.
4. It’s Okay To Cry
Some people think crying is weak. In reality, it’s okay to cry or feel angry. Let yourself feel. If you never let go of negative emotions, they build up, and you end up blowing up. Those bottled-up feelings inside only make you feel worse.
Take a few cry breaks. Let yourself feel around those you trust and love. You can cry alone in your bedroom, thinking of memories. One day you will realize you don’t need to cry. One day you’ll be able to face the light of the day without those tears.
At one point, you might think the tears will never stop, but one day they will. It’s natural and normal to let go of feelings when you are mourning someone you love.
5. Center Yourself
You’re going to feel the waves of sadness at the most random times. You might be washing dishes and suddenly feel overcome with sadness. This is normal. You have to learn to center yourself during these helpless times.
Take deep breaths and feel your entire body. If you need to cry, you can do so. This doesn’t mean you’re slipping into depression. It means you’re a normal person that is dealing with grief. When you breathe deeply and calm yourself down, you’re able to stay grounded.
Waves of grief are something that never totally stop. You might feel knocked over by a wave years after your loved one passes. Center yourself and feel the pain, then get back to your life.
6. Understand Feelings
Mourning takes a lot of understanding when it comes to feelings. Ongoing grief is normal. Understand that it’s okay to some days feel on top of the world like you’re going to be okay, then the next day feels as if your world is ending. We aren’t meant as humans to only feel the good times. We know there will be a time when we feel pain and sadness.
Learn to accept these feelings. If you push them away at all costs, you’ll never heal. Remember that you’ll also feel appreciation and love when thinking of your lost loved one.
You’ll have times that memories bring a smile to your face and times that memories hit you in the gut. Understand and feel each emotion to move forward.
7. Reach Out For Support
You don’t have to do anything alone. Reach out for friends, loved ones, support groups, and professionals. People will beg to help you at the beginning of your loss. Then they seem to fade away. They are still there. They just aren’t in your face trying to offer support.
Remember to reach out to those you trust to talk about your feelings. Tell people when you need them. If you put your head in the ground, no one knows you need help. Don’t feel strange about talking to a professional. Sometimes the only way to move past your mourning is to seek professional help.
There are people that deal with grief on a daily basis. They know how to give you the tools you need to handle your own grief. Never feel weak about asking for help.
8. Celebrate The Life Of Your Loved One
Remember to celebrate the life of your loved one. It’s important to keep their memory alive by honoring them. Anniversaries and holidays will be tough, but you can make these times better by remembering the happy times.
You can even collect donations to their favorite charity or do something they love to remember them. It’s all about honoring your relationship in a way that brings their life to light. You can even celebrate them on a daily basis if you feel. You can light a candle or talk to them each day. Listen to music they loved, so you dance a little. Wear their old t-shirt, so you feel their spirit.
You know how to celebrate the things they loved. You know in your heart you’ll never forget them, but it’s important to celebrate their life as well.
9. Adopt Mindfulness Practices
There are a few things you can do daily that help you practice mindfulness. You can do deep breathing, as we mentioned before. This helps you feel and bring yourself back to the present. You can pray or meditate.
This helps you clear your mind. You’re able to expel all of the thoughts bouncing around in your head by just being. These things help you live in the movement. Focus on the moment that you’re in at all times. This will help your mind stay focused instead of drifting to your grief. You’ll be able to only see and think of the things that are in that very minute.
When you feel overwhelmed with grief, try these practices to bring you back to that day and that minute of your life.
10. Stay Curious
It’s tough to be sad and curious at the same time. Do something that piques your curiosity, so you stay busy and occupied. You might take a local class to learn a new subject or hobby. Join a travel group. Find a hobby that you enjoy. You don’t need to follow any set of rules. Find something that makes you happy. By doing these things, you’ll find a new outlook on life. You’ll realize that life does go on.
Overall, remember that life goes on. You may feel as if life is never going to be the same. Though it won’t be the same, you will learn how to handle it without your loved one. It will be tough, but it will be worth it to make it out the other side. Fight to find the goodness in each day. Find your light, and you’ll be able to shine it for others as well.